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Headlines matching 'flu'
Wed April 23, 2014
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
HBO developing new show about aliens influencing Ancient Egypt. I'm not saying it sounds like Stargate, but it sounds like Stargate
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 


Mon April 21, 2014
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Female Marine who flunked the Marine Core's Infantry Officer Course says she was set up for failure, and that physical fitness standards for women need to be... increased?
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(145)
 


Thu April 17, 2014
(Salon)
 
 
 
Portland flushed 38 million gallons of drinking water, thanks to a single dick
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(133)
 
(News 10 ABC Sacramento)
 
 
 
This is what happens when you weirdos dress Sir Whiskerlickens von Fluffybutt in people clothes
source: news10.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 


Wed April 16, 2014
(Fox News)
 
 
 
What's a good Democrat to do if she wants to use her remarks from a Senate hearing in a campaign ad, but accidentally flubbed them on camera? Why, restage the hearing and pretend like it's the real one, of course
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 


Mon April 14, 2014
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
This may come as a surprise, but business groups and the wealthy have substantial impacts on U.S. government policy, while average citizens have little or no influence. Here comes the science
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 


Sun April 13, 2014
(NPR)
 
 
 
Congress has pissed off the rest of the world again, with Republicans blocking IMF reforms that the rest of the world has overwhelmingly approved. The non-vote will actually weaken America's influence. Dick move, GOP
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 


Sat April 12, 2014
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Surviving members of GWAR release a statement on the death of Dave Brockie. Usually all the fluids GWAR sprays makes it LESS dusty
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 


Thu April 10, 2014
(WTFark)
 
Plug
 
JESUS CHRIST STRIPPERBAR: True Believers Spread the Word at Strip Club. Just Like Jesus Would Do
 
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Could the corrupting influence of money ever be taken out of Washington? Or should we just get over it and resign ourselves to a corrupt status quo, and move on to other issues?
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
New report: Tamiflu is crap and we wasted millions of dollars on it
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 


Sat April 05, 2014
(The Fiscal Times)
 
 
 
Ted Cruz continues to win friends and influence others in the GOP by promising to end his shenanigans, and behave himself, and then not doing so
source: thefiscaltimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 


Fri April 04, 2014
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Jon Stewart biatch slaps SCOTUS: "the last great hope of preserving our democracy from the corrupting influence of money is carpal tunnel syndrome"
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 


Thu April 03, 2014
(Trust.org)
 
 
 
France briefs doctors on warning signs of ebola as fears grow that latest outbreak could spread from Africa. Briefly, when a patient complains of flu-like symptoms then starts to bleed from the eyes and liquefy like a bass in a blender, it's ebola
source: trust.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 


Sun March 30, 2014
(Christian News)
 
 
 
Alabama Governor Robert Bentley (R-ighteous) unveils plan to help Alabama's students overcome gang violence, drugs, alcohol, peer pressure, and negative media influence
source: christiannews.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(107)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Newt Gingrich expresses concern that ultra-rich donors like Sheldon Adelson may have too much influence on the American political process. That's the joke
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 


Wed March 26, 2014
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Silly you, clowns ride tricycles, not naked grown men under the influence of cocaine
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(39)
 
(LiveJournal)
 
 
 
Photoshop Fluffy, the Destroyer of Worlds
source: ic.pics.livejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Walgreen finds that a milder flu season is a prescription for failure
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 


Tue March 25, 2014
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Taco Bell sent 1,000 free "breakfast phones" to "fast-food influencers" to go on "secret breakfast missions." Unemployed millennials, consider branding yourselves as fast-food influencers to get some respect
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 


Fri March 21, 2014
(Medium)
 
 
 
The fluid dynamics of beer tapping finally explained by dedicated team of drunk physicists (with video)
source: medium.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 


Wed March 19, 2014
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Vaccines cause autism. Big Pharma is conspiring to keep us sick. HIV was created to kill minorities. Fluoridation is how companies get rid of toxic waste. Half of you believed something in this headline
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Forget flying car, here's a 1,000 mph car. Where we're going, we don't need a flux capacitor
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(Trust.org)
 
 
 
Yet another mystery hemorrhagic fever is set to come racing out of Africa. Naturally, it appears as 'flu-like' symptoms before your whole body just sorta liquefies
source: trust.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 


Tue March 18, 2014
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Hell hath no flurry? Woman allegedly set car on fire after man refused to buy her a McFlurry
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 


Wed March 12, 2014
(KSDK St. Louis)
 
 
 
Ukrainian lawmaker vows to use his influence with the new interim president to push peace with Russia, let Crimea forge its own path. HA, GOTCHA. He wants Ukraine to go nuclear
source: ksdk.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(NBC Miami)
 
 
 
Bieber lawyer takes affluenza defense up another notch
source: nbcmiami.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Jazz great Charlie Parker died this day in 1955 in a flurry of 16th notes, alcohol and heroin
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 


Mon March 10, 2014
(Politico)
 
 
 
"Canadians are so polite, mild-mannered, modest, unassuming, open-minded. Thank God my family fled that oppressive influence before it could change me." - Texas Sen. Ted Cruz
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 


Sat March 08, 2014
(Some Sad Liberal)
 
 
 
Bartcop died this morning of flu, pneumonia and leukemia. His first online presence was "Rush Limbaugh, Lying Nazi Whore", and started in 1996. RIP
source: bartcop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 


Fri March 07, 2014
(The Lancet)
 
 
 
Those crazy people who are afraid of fluoride might have been right all along
source: thelancet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 


Mon March 03, 2014
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Former Bush flunkie chides Obama administration for failing to use "contingency planning sessions" to anticipate global events and deal with them pre-emptively. That's the joke
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 


Sun March 02, 2014
(NYPost)
 
 
 
It turns out that flushable wipes are not flushable after all. Well, shiat
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(180)
 


Sat March 01, 2014
(Dorking and Leatherhead)
 
 
 
Residents and merchants of Dorking surveyed on what they value about Dorking. "Dorking is lucky enough to have some real destination retail outlets, such as Astronomia, The Fluff-a-torium and Dorking Desk Shop" (12)
 
(Equestria Daily)
 
 
 
Um, excuse me, but Fluttershy needs to help the Breezies find a new home. They'll likely twist her to do their bidding, but I'm sure she won't mind. So, it would be just great if you could watch 'It Ain't Easy Being Breezies' at 10:30AM on The Hub
source: equestriadaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(220)
 


Mon February 24, 2014
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Intent on getting a Fark headline every week, Kansas legislature is now seeking to mandate public health warnings if drinking water contains fluoride
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(155)
 


Sat February 22, 2014
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
It isn't just NBC coverage of the Olympics that sucks; every country in the world is obsessed with national athletes' influential dead relatives, heartwarming struggles, their Lycra-covered breasts and biased officiating. Here's a quick roundup
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 


Fri February 21, 2014
(College Football Talk)
 
 
 
How to Win Friends and Influence People, by Bret Bielema
source: collegefootballtalk.nbcsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 


Thu February 20, 2014
(Time)
 
 
 
TIME compiles a list of the 13 most "influential" candy bars of all time. Subby never even heard of #6. Who the heck would eat a candy bar called "Chicken Dinner"?
source: newsfeed.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 


Sat February 15, 2014
(Equestria Daily)
 
 
 
Will the Ponytones be tone deaf without Big Mac? Can Fluttershy sing them to victory? Is this Flutterguy's chance for a comeback tour? Make sure your CDs don't start skipping, it's time for 'Filli Vanilli' on MLP:FiM (10:30a est, Hub)
source: equestriadaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(269)
 


Fri February 14, 2014
(News24)
 
 
 
Remember that flushable cat litter from the dollar store? Yeah, about that
source: news24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(CBS San Francisco)
 
 
 
Intersex? Gender Fluid? Pangender? Here's the complete list of every Facebook profile gender option, for those who are curious, or maybe bi-curious
source: sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 


Thu February 13, 2014
(Pro Football Talk)
 
 
 
Ed Reed has $50k in cash stolen from his car, a one time, fluke incident that will surely never happen again, now that people know Ed Reed sometimes keeps $50k in cash in his car
source: profootballtalk.nbcsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Can a legislator hate unions so much that he is willing to violate a federal law that forbids influencing an election on union representation? Let's ask Bob Corker
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(124)
 


Tue February 11, 2014
(Washington University St. Louis)
 
 
 
Visualization of malignant neoplasmic tissue injected with indocyanine green fluores... Wait, this is Fark: Combine Google Glass and Geordi La Forge's Visor and you can get rid of cancer faster
source: news.wustl.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(6)
 


Sun February 09, 2014
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
WV Water company: "They can't hate us any more than they already do, right? So why NOT charge the public for the water needed to flush our contaminated water out of their systems, then refuse to issue the water credits we promised?"
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 


Fri February 07, 2014
(Radar Magazine)
 
 
 
The secret report from 1993 that exonerated Woody Allen: Doctors told cops that Dylan Farrow's Sex Abuse Story was 'Fantasy-like' influenced by Mom Mia -- plus one weird trick to win custody
source: radaronline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(295)
 


Thu February 06, 2014
(CNN)
 
 
 
Texas judge orders "affluenza" teen into rehab. Medical experts plan to suck all the money out of his parents bank account to pay for the treatment until such time he no longer has to worry about their money
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(135)
 


Wed February 05, 2014
(The Daily Caller)
 
 
 
Sandra Fluke decides not to go to term
source: dailycaller.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Bubblews)
 
 
 
A thirsty Curiosity Rover finds a way to top off the fluids on Mars
source: bubblews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The Koch Brothers are funding a cartoon that exposes how corporations use political influence
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 


Mon January 27, 2014
(RealClear)
 
 
 
"It will taste salty. Some will drip down the back of your throat," says U.S. Government employee who, surprisingly, does not work for IRS
source: realclear.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
♫ You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away and know when to flush ♫
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Capital Journal)
 
 
 
Proposed South Dakota bill would fail kids with reading problems. Bill is flunked by a clinical psychologist. Fark: Subby is the psychologist, who found out about the bill on Fark
source: capjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(154)
 


Sun January 26, 2014
(CNN)
 
 
 
Man proves that flushing money down the toilet isn't just some idiom
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 


Sat January 25, 2014
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Scariest headline of the day: Toilet flushing system recalled due to impact, laceration hazards
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 


Fri January 24, 2014
(io9)
 
 
 
I'm kind of wondering what would happen to your voice if you just, you know, like stop talking? I mean, I don't talk sometimes, like at home although then I talk to my cat Mr. Fluffy. Or at night, but actually friends say I kind of talk in my sleep
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 


Thu January 23, 2014
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A who's who of influential VA Republicans have lined up to offer newly-indicted ex Governor McDonnell their moral support. Their financial support however? Not so much
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 


Mon January 20, 2014
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Canadians avoiding flu shots because they can't take a little prick
source: ca.news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Steven Spielberg tops list of most influential celebrities. Which is not to be confused with Charlie Sheen topping the list of celebrities most under the influence
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(5)
 


Sat January 18, 2014
(Time)
 
 
 
Feeling hungry? Here are the 17 most influential burgers of all-time, with an iconic slider at number one
source: newsfeed.time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 


Fri January 17, 2014
(Automotive News)
 
 
 
Tesla flubs Detroit auto show presentation, stock surges 16%
source: autonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 


Thu January 16, 2014
(USA Today)
 
 
 
CDC says that only one third of all U.S. adults got a flu shot last year. Officials concede that the number may be skewed by Alex Rodriguez claiming 40 flu shots during the baseball season
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Beijing's air downgraded to "fluffy dirt"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 


Wed January 15, 2014
(KVIA El Paso)
 
 
 
Healthy 21-year-old movie theater concession stand worker dies of the flu. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: kvia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
So you're standing in an Arby's bathroom stall during the dinner rush. You're covered in red dye, furiously trying to flush $5800 cash down the toilet and wondering why the hell you didn't check to see if the getaway car was working BEFORE the heist
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 


Tue January 14, 2014
(BBC)
 
 
 
England will be getting a fifth of its energy from mining uneaten English food that has been flung into English garbage dumps in as little as 15 years. You submitted this with a spotted dick joke
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 


Mon January 13, 2014
(Popular Science)
 
 
 
9,137 scientists wrote peer-reviewed articles about global climate change last year. How many said it wasn't directly influenced by man? 1,000? Lower. 500? Lower. 100? Lower. 10? Lower. 2? Lower
source: popsci.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(617)
 


Sun January 12, 2014
(WCHS Charleston)
 
 
 
CEO Gary Southern sips bottled water while attempting to dodge hot, persistent reporter's fluid questions about Freedom Industries poisoning the water of 300,000 in W. Va. Gulp
source: wchstv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(187)
 


Fri January 10, 2014
(WSAZ West Virginia)
 
 
 
Water has a lot of awesome uses... unless you live in one of five counties in West Virginia; in those cases you're limited to flushing the crapper and putting out couch fires
source: wsaz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(130)
 


Tue January 07, 2014
(MSN)
 
 
 
Hong Kong movie mogul Run Run Shaw, whose kung-fu movies influenced Quentin Tarantino and other Hollywood directors, is no longer run running at age 107
source: movies.msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 


Mon January 06, 2014
(DFW Star-Telegram)
 
 
 
SWAT team launches tear gas into a house to flush out a suspect in a shooting. One burned down house later, they succeed. How Waco of them
source: star-telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 


Sun January 05, 2014
(ABC Local)
 
 
 
Remember the swine flu? Well, it's out of rehab and starting its comeback tour in California
source: abclocal.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Edmonton Journal)
 
 
 
Say what you will about Obamacare, but in Canada they give out free flu shots at inner-city bars
source: edmontonjournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 


Fri January 03, 2014
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Today's music teacher giving extracurricular skin flute lessons to a student brought to you by Overbrook High School in New Jersey
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
Here comes the flurry of seasonal articles about calling 'dibs' on shoveled-out parking spaces
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
London's subway routes were heavily influenced by: a) the Stig, b) the Time Lords, or c) up to 12,000 corpses beneath a single church causing parishioners to pass out or explode
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 


Thu January 02, 2014
(RotoExperts)
 
 
 
Like real golf, Fantasy golf can afford you the appearance of affluence
source: rotoexperts.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(8)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
What you drink influences how you vote. Like Absolut or Stolichnaya? Yer likely a Democrat. Enjoy Crown Royal or Jim Beam? Yep, Republican. Love Jägermeister or tequila? Just stay home
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Pervez Musharraf hospitalized after "feeling ill on his way to court". That's not the flu, sir, that's guilt
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(9)
 


Wed January 01, 2014
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
You're an internationally renowned flautist from Canada who lovingly crafts your flutes by hand. U.S. Customs officials: These are made of wood, which makes them agricultural products and therefore must be destroyed
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(325)
 


Tue December 31, 2013
(NPR)
 
 
 
Patrick Stewart, the coolest man in the universe, demonstrates his fluency in various dialects of cow
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 


Mon December 30, 2013
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Families of the victims of affluenza begin working towards a cure
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Flu outbreak sweeps 10 states so far... and flu season hasn't even peaked yet. Your take on getting a flu shot? Experts say it's not too late - just kinda late
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(178)
 


Sat December 28, 2013
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Twitter's stock price drops 13% after influential analyst points out "nothing has changed in the past 15 days." But before you weep for the impending collapse of Twitter, note that it's still valued at $34.7 billion
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 

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