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Headlines matching 'far'
Tue April 22, 2014
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Fark: Naval Academy lacrosse player threatens cab driver with a knife. Farker: A butter knife
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Texas, where pig farms have better air-condition and temperature regulations than the state jails
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(175)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Fark: In the previous calendar year there were 100 cases of MERS. FARK: In the last two weeks there have been 100. MERS kill rate is 33 %. Farkkkkk
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Some biatchin' Camaro HQ)
 
 
 
Ex-Detroit Tiger recounts how his career was damaged by an affinity for 'The Dead Milkmen': "Baseball's rural. It has its roots in farmland shiat, they still chew tobacco"
source: chinmusic.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Tesla, symbol of American manufacturing resurgence, is planning another factory. FARK: In China
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Major League Baseball)
 
 
 
"Squirrel is heading toward 3rd." Fark's very own makes his MLB debut. Must've had a large 2-0 count
source: m.mlb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
Not News: 2016 Presidential hopeful supports ObamaCare. Fark: Republican Jeb Bush
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Designer creates Metro-style road map of all 48 contiguous United States. "The individual state maps still look relatively simple and far more subway map-like: it's only when you see the whole thing put together that it looks so insane"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 


Mon April 21, 2014
(Fark)
 
Plug
 
I used to be a regular farker like you, but then I took an arrow to the wallet
 
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Remember those thousands of farmers who committed mass-suicide over failed GMO crops? Yeah, about that
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Viewers ask: Has Game of Thrones finally gone too far? (spoilers) (and references to rape involving siblings over the corpse of their dead offspring, but whatever)
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(232)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Reddit users revolting due to headline censorship. Fark users would never put up with that kind of farking bullshiat. Boobies
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Globe and Mail)
 
 
 
Farmers-only dating site hopes to encourage more rolls in the hay, sowing of seed
source: theglobeandmail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(The Daily Californian)
 
 
 
How to poofread you're friend's essay without sounding like a totalfarker
source: dailycal.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Donovan McNabbed, police find dog with a cell phone but no collar ID, and Vladimir Putin not the only Russian losing his shirt: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 4/13 - 4/19
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(8)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Bad: Your neighborhood has a rash of break-ins. Good: People in your neighborhood start up a block watch. Fark: The KKK starts up your block watch. Includes photo of what a KKK block watch poster might look like
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(266)
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Look upward and share the wonders I've seen. A Farscape movies is in the works
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 


Sun April 20, 2014
(KSBW Monterey)
 
 
 
At last, our long national nightmare is over. California farmers will get more water thanks to The Department of Water Resources, the U.S. Bureau of Reclamation and state and federal officials
source: ksbw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Dumb: Getting caught texting while driving. Dumber: You're an on-duty police officer. Fark: On a motorcycle
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming up live at the top of the hour it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of music from Juneau, Alaska, hosted by a farker
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(227)
 


Sat April 19, 2014
(ABC)
 
 
 
News: Twins attack carjacker with fists and rubber snake. Fark: They're seven years old
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
5/3 NEPA/NJ - Lehigh Valley Fark Party
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Riverside Fark Party
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
GOP's problems are due to infiltration by liberals causing it to lean too far to the left
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
2nd Annual Farks In The Wild at the Buffalo Zoo. July 23, 6pm
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Denver Fark Party: 4/19 - 4/20
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 
(TSN)
 
 
 
Unless there is another multi-OT game (darn, what a shame THAT would be), today's NHL playoff games are spaced far enough apart that you should be able to see them all. CHI/STL @ 3ET, COL/PIT @ 7 & COL/MIN @ 9:30. Get your chores done early today
source: tsn.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(940)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Not News: Two elderly women aged 63 and 58 allegedly bilked their 74-year-old neighbor. News: Out of $450,000. Fark: That she had set aside for her pride and joy, a cat named Puddy Cat
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
If you ever owned a shortwave radio back during the Cold War, you probably remember those creepy 'Number Stations' where a child or woman's voice would utter random numbers, presumably code for field agents. FARK: They're still on the air
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(193)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
The average bank or insurance document contains more words than it took for Shakespeare to write Macbeth, and they could all be condensed into 'If anything happens, you're farked. Sign here'
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
After female camel who lives on farm with no male camels gives birth, farmer asks nervously, "What are you all looking at me for?"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
May 3, 8pm: STL Fark Party 2: Electric Boogaloo (UPDATED)
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(92)
 


Fri April 18, 2014
(Chicago Business)
 
 
 
Hey dude far out, but ya know 100 bucks can buy a lot of burritos
source: chicagobusiness.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets" and other pearls of food wisdom from Fark's patron saint, Ron Swanson
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's now time for your favorite thing on Friday, the Fark Weird News Quiz. Okay, second favorite after the fact that it's Friday. Well, third thing after the fact that it's Friday and you're not wearing pants. I'll come in again
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Joint statement from Geneva: We realize everyone's shiat is all emotional right now, but everyone needs the chill the fark out, cuz we got us a plan to fix everything in Ukraine
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(MIT)
 
 
 
MIT scholars say that the safety risks of nuclear reactors, and the safety risks of offshore oil platforms, should cancel out if you just combine the two somewhere far, far away from MIT
source: newsoffice.mit.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Not News: People are mad at Michelle Obama over food. Fark: Easter eggs
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Amazon should buy Sears, claims business analyst whose head is too far up his anus
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Eight-year-old girl gets surprise package from Amazon in the mail. Fark: It contains two boxes of condoms and Amazon won't tell her parents who the anonymous sender is, unless they get a a subpoena. Cops: It "might" be considered harassment
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(148)
 


Thu April 17, 2014
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
Have you ever played FarmVille for a long time and noticed the chickens act just like Don Knotts and the rabbits look like Natalie Portman?
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(KPTV Portland)
 
 
 
Apparently the state has learned something in the past 44 years and chose to bury it a big farking hole rather than blowing it up
source: kptv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Not news: New dance club opens in New York. Fark: You have to be under 12 to get in
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Holiday meal planning time, so tell us - Do you do something special for Good Friday and Easter? Have go-to recipes for Passover? What recipes will be big wins for family gatherings?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Rowdy Roddy Piper says he sees the ghosts of dead wrestlers. These WWE/SyFy crossovers are going a bit too far
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(WTFark)
 
 
 
A boy, a claw machine, and a very special guest on this week's WTFark
source: ora.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Not news: The Most Haunted Place In The World. News: It's For Sale. FARK: The core of the island is literally human remains
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(93)
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
State university has a $36 million shortfall. How to deal with this? Give the head financial administrator a 40k raise. What the fark, UMaine?
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 467: "Muybridge". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 


Wed April 16, 2014
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Ha Ha. You thought the rat apocalypse that was invading Britain was bad, get ready for the giant Asian killer hornets that have killed six so far
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(48)
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
With Easter fast approaching, it's time for the annual "How to make your own marshmallow Peeps" Fark thread. Directions to the left, ideas of what to do with them to the right
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Not news: The new Samsung Galaxy S5's fingerprint sensor has design flaw that makes hacking ridiculously easy. Fark: Fingerprint sensor authentication allows access to user's bank account
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(World Review)
 
 
 
Euroscepticism is on the march across Europe. Watch in horror as European countries slide in slow-motion towards the (far-ish) right during the May EU elections. And here's a question - if EU falls apart, how will Russia react?
source: worldreview.info   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Cool: Senate able to reach bipartisan agreement and pass legislation. Fark: To give $85 Billion in tax breaks to the 1%
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Naples Daily News)
 
 
 
News: Teacher Arrested For DUI. Worse News: She blew a .27 two hours after she was pulled over... Fark: ...on her way to school at 7:00 a.m
source: m.naplesnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
High school coach facing jail for A) having a sexual relationship with a minor, B) embezzling school funds, or C) shoving a kid who farted in his face
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 


Tue April 15, 2014
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
India has created a third sex for transgendered people. Fark has created no sex, for any people
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
In addition to wearing number 42 today, major league ballplayers might want to futher honor Jackie Robinson by saying "fark you" to the team bus driver
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Small town fights sexting scandal with common sense, which makes it pretty hard to come up with a really good Fark headline
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Keloland)
 
 
 
News: Bodies of two missing teenage girls found when their overturned car was spotted in a creek less than a mile from where they were last seen. Fark: 42 years later
source: keloland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 
(Advertising Age)
 
 
 
Congress wants to regulate Photoshopping. Farkers with guns and tanks mass at the Maryland border
source: adage.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(RamblingBeachCat.com)
 
 
 
Embarrassing: Trying to rob a hair salon. Really Embarrassing: Have the receptionist laugh in your face. Farking Embarrassing: Having to call your mom to come pick you up after the failed robbery attempt
source: ramblingbeachcat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British Farkers who click on this will likely experience a wet sensation in their groin area
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(70)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
News: Pa Kettle elected mayor of town. Fark: He's a dog. Ultra Fark: He beat out a cat, a wolf, a hedgehog, a horse and several other dogs
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 


Mon April 14, 2014
(Fox News)
 
 
 
There's a blood moon tonight. What does it mean? WHAT DOES IT MEAN??? Seriously, I have no farking idea here
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(380)
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Shrug: 10 unique vehicles you want as an adult. Fark: 10 unique vehicles you want as a supervillian
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
Woman regrets buying Neil Diamond album. FARK: because it cost her $4364
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Lab-grown vaginas, springtime in Toronto, and a man with three wishes: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 4/6 - 4/12
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(3)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Not News: Famous person throws terrible first pitch at baseball game. FARK: Person is future HOFer Jim Thome
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
Not News: Man is stabbed. News: In the neck. Fark: And he won't cooperate with the police
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Spectacular Orioles play in the field saves a run. Fark: By the third-base ball girl. (Priceless reaction shot at 0:25)
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 


Sun April 13, 2014
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Carl Kasell tells me to stop noodling around on Fark.com...Fark shout out on Wait, Wait...pre-news teaser
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Researchers determine that cognitive decline begins at age 24. FARK: By studying StarCraft 2 players
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Page Six)
 
 
 
The best looking college strippers in New York come from Baruch and Brooklyn Colleges, the most rejects from Queens College and NYU. "They're not so good-looking. I don't know why. So far, none have met our standards"
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
Not news: New Virginia governor vetoes bill that passed with only one no vote. Not news: It affected the red light camera industry, which gave him and his party $63,000. Fark: Loophole in law means you can throw the citation away with no penalty
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
"I like my beer like I like my violence...domestic" sign gets bartender fired. FARK: the sign sports the Heineken logo
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Muslim blogger decides to wear a hijab in public to prove that people are racist. Fark: Everyone was nicer to her, and gave her respect (to be fair, this was Canada)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 
(Hardball Talk)
 
 
 
Yankee fans disappointed after Derek Jeter is given the day off. Joe Girardi: "I wasn't hired to put on a farewell tour"
source: hardballtalk.nbcsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Atlanta Farkers have lost the most upbeat, lovable traffic reporter known to mankind. RIP Captain Herb Emory
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Not news: Wedding. News: Priest sings during ceremony. Fark: It's so freakin' awesome
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 


Sat April 12, 2014
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
Chicago Sun-Times will not let readers comment on articles because, according to the managing editor, internet comments are a "morass of negativity, racism, and hate speech." Good thing he's never visited the Fark Politics tab
source: voices.suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(183)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Not news: Thieves cut the power and break in to a business with the intention of stealing money out of a safe. News: They tried to pry the safe open but failed. Fark: So they stole $15,000 worth of hair-removal products
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Marijuana stocks considered best investment of the next decade. Far out, man
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Best 10 Jewish delis in the country. Mmmm, who wants to meet up at Katz's and stage Fark's first group fake orgasm. Well, first at a deli anyway. OK, fine. First today at a deli. Fine you win. Who wants to meet at Katz's?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
The biggest economic struggle facing America today? Convincing youths that farming is an acceptable career choice
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 


Fri April 11, 2014
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Fittingly enough, a technical glitch forced outgoing Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius to interrupt her farewell speech at the White House
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(Info Wars)
 
 
 
The Bureau of Land Management brought snipers to the Bundy Ranch to protect the desert tortoise. And by desert tortoise, I mean they want his land for a $5B Chinese solar farm deal
source: infowars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(373)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Time for the Fark Weird News Quiz. Currently only available to Totalfarkers
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Watch this horse make farting noises with its mouth, because you have free Totalfark all day
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(7)
 
(Badger Herald)
 
 
 
Europe, you've finally gone too far. This, this we'll fight for
source: badgerherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Softpedia)
 
 
 
Not News: Microsoft made a game "Escape From XP" to get people to stop using XP. Fark: It won't run in XP with Internet Explorer
source: news.softpedia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Boy Scout proves to bullies that he can indeed start a fire. Because it ended up on Fark, you know it backfired
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Today in "b-b-b-b-b-but we need government otherwise Somalia": Social Security is now seizing people's assets for 'overpayments' to their ancestors three, four, five decades ago - overpayments they prove were made using FARK YOU, CITIZEN as evidence
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
He graduated Harvard at 18. As an officer in the National Security Agency, he is believed to have invented vodka Jell-O shots. He's also the farking funniest recording artist of the 20th Century. Ladies and gentlemen, Tom Lehrer
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Category 5 cyclone bearing down on Queensland Australia. Be safe Aussie Farkers
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
And you're getting TotalFark... and *you're* getting TotalFark... EVERYBODY'S GETTING TOTALFARK (for today only, your mileage may vary, void where prohibited, don't try this at home)
source: beesbeesbees.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(959)
 


Thu April 10, 2014
(Impact Wrestling)
 
 
 
WHO will become the #1 Contender for Magnus' World Title? CAN the Wolves take the Tag Titles from the BroMans? WHY THE FARK is Dixie Carter allowed back in public? LIVE from ORLANDO, THIS is YOUR Impact Wrestling Discussion Thread (9pm ET on Spike)
source: impactwrestling.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(311)
 
(Some Food Nut)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Let's head out to the great outdoors. What are your tips and tricks for making the most of campfire cooking? Have some good recipes?
source: outdoorcookingchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
In an effort to make Fark headlines more often in the future, the town of Downers Grove seeks to give an old folk's home a liquor license
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Future Structure)
 
 
 
Wind farm to be constructed using only an Allen wrench and incomprehensibly vague instructions
source: futurestructure.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
The first reviews of Fargo, the TV series, are rolling in and is it any good? Yup, you betcha
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(Discover)
 
 
 
Here's a question you probably haven't spent enough time wondering about: Do camel farts contribute to global warming? And if so, how much?
source: blogs.discovermagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
News: Man sets world record for wearing heaviest coat. Fark: It's made of more than 460,000 live bees
source: ibtimes.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Christian Science Monitor)
 
 
 
After finding Bank of America with its hand too far in the cash drawer, the CFPB slams it on them, hard, forcing them to refund nearly $800 million to customers it sold BS "identity theft protection" and "credit card Insurance" to
source: csmonitor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Global Geopolitics)
 
 
 
Germany is warned by top economists that the Eurozone debt crisis is not going away, deepening and threatens to re-erupt on a larger scale. Well color me shocked and fark me sideways
source: glblgeopolitics.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(NESN)
 
 
 
Not news: NHL player scores a goal. News: 0 seconds into the game. Fark: He didn't play in the game
source: nesn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Actress gets sued for not performing nude scene in SkineMax series. Judge to rule: "Why the fark are you even on this show if you didn't want to get naked?"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
Cab driver repeatedly turns down smoking hot woman's sexual advances, so she gets him thrown in jail. Good News: He caught the whole thing on camera. Fark: Police didn't even bother looking at it until he sued (video is not safe for work)
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(Today's Zaman)
 
 
 
Shark: jumped. Chicken: farked. Erdogan, emboldened by election "results" to cut ties with Europe
source: todayszaman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
News: Ice kills 9 blue whales near Newfoundland. Fark: 9 whales is 4% of their Atlantic population
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(94)
 
(Smithsonian Magazine)
 
Farktography
 
Smithsonian Magazine has announced the finalists in their 2013 Photo Contest. Farker 3Horn's photo from Burning Man is #7 in the "Americana" category
source: smithsonianmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 466: "Tableau 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 


Wed April 09, 2014
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Woman forgets that Texas is farther away from Colorado than maps would have you believe
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Tipping thread....not like regular Fark. Grab some tissues
source: trendcup.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
McCain: Teddy Roosevelt spoke softly and carried a big stick, you're talking strongly and carrying a twig. Kerry: For fark's sake, at least I'm doing something over here. All you want to do is bomb the crap out of people
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
When you're a federal expert on child welfare why not go ahead and drunkenly yell at teenaged girls without your pants on
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Not News: US imports something from China. Fark: It's a mass-stabbing
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
A first look at Medicare data in 35 years. And guess what, it's as farked up and all over the place like Billy in those damn Family Circus comics
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Video Spew)
 
 
 
Screwing with your State Farm agent
source: videospew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(7)
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Vivid Video filing lawsuit to keep Farrah Abraham from opening one of her holes
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 


Tue April 08, 2014
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Court decides that mocking Bobby Jindal is perfectly okay. Farkers rejoice
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 


Mon April 07, 2014
(Fark)
 
 
 
UPDATE: 4/19 Denver Fark Party now co-hosted by VivianVivisect. LGT original thread
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(Exeter Express & Echo)
 
 
 
Cinema closes because of flooding... Fark: On the first screening of Noah
source: exeterexpressandecho.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Masseuse snatches Rolex, Chinese may have found range to MH370 with one ping only, and the Gary Busey Hypothesis: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 3/30 - 4/5
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(4)
 
(Wikipedia)
 
 
 
This may come as a surprise to Farkers since most observe this daily, but today the rest of the country is celebrating National Beer Day
source: en.wikipedia.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Fark is ruining your brain
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(76)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
"Gay marriage is a sign we don't believe in God." I'm pretty sure it's just a sign that God is one kinky motherfarker
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Not news: hockey game has bench-clearing brawl. Fark: it was a FDNY/NYPD charity hockey game
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 


Sun April 06, 2014
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Not news: Attempted mugging in Detroit. News: Victim fights back. FARK: Victim is 72-year-old man with a cane
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
#21: Their Fark handle is seen regularly in Politics tab threads
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
School principal and security guard assault and press felony charges against high school student. Fark: For using the "wrong" bathroom. Ultra Fark: The security guard spied on the kid while he was in the bathroom (77)
 
(National Geographic)
 
 
 
Cornell University student decides to find out the most painful place to get stung by a bee. The answer may surprise you. Fark: The only test subject was himself
source: phenomena.nationalgeographic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(114)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
You know that credit reporting agency that Target offered free service for its customers after it got hacked? It got hacked too. FARK: Over 200 million Social Security numbers may have been stolen
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Dumb: Taking a 1 year-old on a sailboat in an attempt to circumnavigate the globe. Dumber: Taking her even though she was sick before you left. Fark: Spending money rescuing these people
source: hosted.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(Cryptozoology News)
 
 
 
Tree camera captures a "young Yowie", also known as the Australian Bigfoot, creeping around in the woods at night. Sleep tight Australian farkers (w/creepy video)
source: cryptozoologynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(86)
 
(Chicago Sun-Times)
 
 
 
First drunken Cubs fan of season thrown out of Wrigley on opening day. Fark: An hour before the first pitch, threw a newspaper stand into an unmarked cop car and finished off with a perfect sidewalk faceplant
source: suntimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(14)
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Coming up live at the top of the hour it's Livingston Stapler Company Presents. Two hours of eclectic music from Juneau, Alaska, hosted by a farker
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(357)
 


Sat April 05, 2014
(LA Weekly)
 
 
 
Obama administration seeks to move Marijuana from Schedule 1 classification. Fark: It will require Congressional cooperation
source: laweekly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(Inland Valley Daily Bulletin)
 
 
 
40th anniversary of Cal Jam, the last great baby boomer music festival, where 200,000 smelly hippies at a racetrack rocked out to the farkin' Eagles, man
source: dailybulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(NW Florida Daily News)
 
 
 
Not news: Family trying to enjoy a day at the park calls the police on a homeless man sleeping on a bench. Fark: Homeless man sitting on a bench calls the police on a family laying down in the park
source: nwfdailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(Bleacher Report)
 
 
 
Derek Jeter refuses to give a ball to a fan begging for it, toying with her emotions by holding it above her head.... so that he can hand it to a little girl behind her. Fark, it's hard to hate this guy
source: bleacherreport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 


Fri April 04, 2014
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Irish sheep farmer inadvertently lets goat mate with his ewe, producing thriving geep that runs faster than a sheep and has softer fur than a goat. "He said the new arrival had created a lot of laughter in the pub"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Boring: Car crashes through family's home. Fark: Another car crashes through family's home
source: thesent.nl   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Snopes)
 
 
 
There. Snopes has spoken. Will you farking idiots please stop blathering about the Yellowstone caldera now? Christ
source: snopes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(146)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Time to test your knowledge against the sharpest minds in the world. Or lacking that, against your fellow Farkers. It's the Fark Weird News Quiz. Please consult your doctor before trying any new quiz
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(WTFark)
 
 
 
WTFark quickly learning the difficulty of quoting Farkers with unbearably long user names. He's probably posting from El Pueblo de Nuestra Señora la Reyna de Los Angeles de Porciúncula
source: ora.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(359)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
News: Security flaw discovered in Xbox. Fark: By five year old
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
After getting the predictable hate mail for featuring a gay couple in their "This is wholesome" ad campaign, Honey Maid graham crackers responds with perhaps the sweetest "no, fark YOU" of all time
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(140)
 
(Lex 18)
 
 
 
Headline: 1.5 millionth Corvette recovered from sinkhole. Fark: How deep IS that hole?
source: lex18.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Porn star seeks new career...as a far-right politician in party with neo-Nazi ties. Gets into trouble with her new colleagues when they discover interracial scenes from her in one of her movies
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(Derby Evening Telegraph)
 
 
 
News: Judge jails abusive partner who threatened victim with knife. Fark: Judge tells domestic abuse victim he could "paper the walls" with letters like hers saying she forgave abusive partner
source: derbytelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(118)
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
You're getting less news on your aggregators, because the journalists who feed it are being laid off: "You think you can replace [reporting] with aggregation? You go online and it's all aggregation. Aggregation is a farking sin. Call some people"
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 


Thu April 03, 2014
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Cobra man with gigantic invisible balls gives not a fark. (Not safe for work language)
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(What's Cooking, America)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Cooking without heat... it's time to bring out your ceviche recipes. What seafood do you use? Do you have twists to surprise your seafood lovers and give them something different?
source: whatscookingamerica.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
Not news: Man wants cremains placed in a jar. Fark: Specifically a Duke's mayonnaise jar
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Farker MyNameIsMofuga's Funniest Person in Austin 2014 set. Tag is for not advancing to the next round
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Pregnant woman upset her mother-in-law bribed a sonogram technician to find out the sex of her future grandchild. You know, as far as fake questions written to Dear Prudence go, this one is pretty solid
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(77)
 
(WCSH 8 Portland)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline courtesy of Captain Obvious
source: wcsh6.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 465: "These Foolish Games 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 


Wed April 02, 2014
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
Neil deGrasse Tyson will speak at Omaha Pastafarians conference. No word yet on whether he will wear the required pirate regalia
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Not News: AZ lawmaker calls for vote to remove openly gay colleague from his leadership post citing his "dishonesty". News: The Lawmaker is a Democrat. Fark: She called for the vote because she doesn't think her colleague is gay ENOUGH
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 
(WNDU South Bend)
 
 
 
In a story made for Fark, student arrested for breaking into a building while drunk, eating half a box of Hot Pockets, and passing out while eating Drumsticks. Bonus: Blew a .106 the next morning
source: wndu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(RealScreen)
 
 
 
Discovery Channel says "Fark it, let's just do the Hunger Games for real"
source: realscreen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Info Wars)
 
 
 
If Infowars and the ACLU are in agreement, human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria can not be far behind
source: infowars.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
News: Man, 83, fights off three attackers. Fark: Has his car stolen the next day
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(WHIO Dayton)
 
 
 
Not news: City tractor at construction site left with keys in it; News: Man finds said tractor and takes it on a joy ride through downtown; Fark: And picks up two women for the ride
source: whio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Ukrainian police investigation of far-right-winger killed in shootout with Ukrainian police has determined Ukrainian police were not at fault. No, he shot himself. Twice
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
You would feel much more creative at work and wouldn't have the need to troll Fark all day if only your boss asked more unusual questions or took you out skydiving
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(3)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Meh: Woman writes books about her childhood. Fark: Using the files kept by the Romanian secret police on her and her family
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
Statistical analysis of profanity in rap. Farking interesting
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Scott Brown: Fark you, Massholes
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Toronto Fark Part'Eh June 7 at Madison's - Baseball, beer, and no Biebers
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Ted Cruz asks if people are better under Obamacare on his Facebook page. Since you're reading this on Fark, you know what happens afterwards
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(298)
 
(Deseret News)
 
 
 
Another year, another Love a Marsupial Day - Totes Far Far, Out The Submitter, and Wombat Pwnage. What'd you like, what'd you hate about it? LGT Dave Barry's Year in Review
source: deseretnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 
(Today)
 
 
 
The Duggars' rules to courtship. Difficulty: no kissing or hand-holding. Fark: the Duggar girls are actually pretty hot now
source: today.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(315)
 


Tue April 01, 2014
(Politico)
 
 
 
...And I brought you farkers donuts. You're welcome
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(China Daily)
 
 
 
"What did the doctor say?" "Farker, he said, you're gonna die"
source: chinadaily.com.cn   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Boston Herald via NMA)
 
 
 
Not news: Farker complains about low speed limits. Fark: State police give him official permission to speed
source: motorists.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
News: High School senior applies to all eight Ivy League schools. Not News: He's not accepted by one of them. Fark: He's accepted by ALL of them
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Sad: owner can't find homes for puppies. Sadder: owner decides to euthanize them with a gun. Fark: puppies shoot back
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Customs officers seize 263 "Fart Bombs"
source: explodingcigar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 


Mon March 31, 2014
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
Apparently, running a car motor wide-open until it blows the fark up is a spectator sport. Grab a beer and watch this, y'all
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
When Netflix tried to bump prices up a bit, everyone on the internet freaked right the fark out. But When Amazon just jumped the cost of prime $20 there was barely a whimper of protest. Why?
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(120)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Yankees owner explains he felt hamstrung by $189 million payroll target and risked perpetual uncompetitiveness if he didn't drop big money on four big-name 2014 free agents to cover for lack of farm talent
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(4)
 
(Truth Revolt)
 
 
 
MSNBC's Ronan Farrow's show still shooting for that "beat Golden Girls repeat in the ratings" milestone
source: truthrevolt.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Pacific Standard Magazine)
 
 
 
Half of academic papers submitted are never read by anyone other than the author, referee, and journal editor. 90% of published papers are never cited. Meh, the odds are still better than getting a submission greenlit on Fark, says "professor" subby
source: psmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
After a three month undercover investigation, cops bust up a property theft ring, a drug ring, and a woman reselling welfare shrimp out of her van
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 


Sun March 30, 2014
(Paste Magazine)
 
 
 
Paste Magazine chooses Stone Farking Wheaton Wootstout as one of the top 10 Beers to Nerd Out With. "The trio wanted to brew a geeky and weird imperial stout and have achieved it well in a beautifully designed bottle as well"
source: pastemagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(Victoria Advocate)
 
 
 
"We live in an age of outrage and apology, in which each secret and slight is posted on Huffington and mocked on Fark, in which every person who makes the slightest misstep is beaten and kicked for the pleasure of the 24-hour news cycle"
source: victoriaadvocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Not news: Country cuts taxes to encourage corporate investment. News: Country cuts corporate taxes in half. Fark: Cuba
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Video of Friday's quake hitting birthday party at Farrell's Ice Cream Parlor near epicenter...beats a flaming SabreJet. Warning: footage contains perplexed youth wearing straw boaters
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 


Sat March 29, 2014
(GoFundMe)
 
 
 
Farker's smoking-hot friend has Crohn's disease and an adorable dog. She has started a fundraiser to help pay for her 8th major surgery. The 7th left her with 18cm of colon. Let the power of Fark help take care of the rest
source: gofundme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Fartbongo to cut down on farts
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(Townhall)
 
 
 
Daryll Issa to investigate into whether the military was told to 'stand down' in Benghazi. Chairman of the Joint Chiefs and his own party respond with investigation into whether or not they farking stuttered the last time he asked
source: townhall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(137)
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Not that it will ever be a risk for most of you Farkers, but the average wedding bill just hit a record $30,000
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(98)
 
(Vimeo)
 
 
 
The most action packed, suspense filled war movie you'll see today starring rabbits. Yes, starring farking rabbits with guns
source: vimeo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Subby's wife says his blood pressure would be lower if he didn't visit Fark. Share your angriest and/or most outrageous Fark moments
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Herald Online)
 
 
 
Cementing itself as a Fark Mecca, Maker's Mark now home to gorgeous Cthulhu installation
source: heraldonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 


Fri March 28, 2014
(SB Nation)
 
 
 
Not news: Pitcher told he's made the team. FARK: In the middle of an inning on the mound
source: sbnation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Not news: Woman jailed for stalking. Fark: She is 71 years old and her stalking victim is a Catholic priest. "She stripped naked and danced in front of him on more than one occasion"
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Not news: Former Bad News Bears child actor has moved on to a new career. News: As a methodist pastor. Fark: And he's doing a 545-mile fundraising bike ride to benefit an LGBT center
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(33)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Stool test that involves smelling the patient's droppings is 76% effective at diagnosing bowel disease, 100% effective at creating job that no farking sane person would ever want, ever
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Rep. Rogers: After years as head of the Intelligence committee, I think I finally found some. I'm out. Fark all y'all *drops pants*
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Clear your desks, remove your pants, and start drinking: It's time for the Fark Weird News Quiz
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
Google performs study on the work styles of its employees. Coincidentally, so did Fark, but it was largely incoherent and the report was soaked in spilled bourbon
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
That's an awfully nice profit we make off your energy demands, India. It'd be a shame if you built a solar farm and...WAIT, STOP. DON'T DO THAT. Oh that's it. Fark you guys
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
Not news: Jackass gets all road ragey, shoots a woman the bird, cuts her off. Fark: What happens next. With video
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(563)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Elizabeth Warren to Obama official: Sallie Mae is under numerous investigations for wrongdoing and you dumbasses renewed their contract? WHAT THE FARK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(Optimal Human Modulation)
 
 
 
Well gorrammit. Ain't nobody told me it was Captain Mal's birthday today. Ain't seen nothing on Fark. So, here's a shiny pictorial in honor of the Captain and Browncoats everywhere. Live to serve. See you in the 'verse
source: optimalhumanmodulation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(ESPN FC)
 
 
 
The ten dumbest soccer injuries that you probably haven't heard of, including one plater who was punched in the face by a teammate during a game for farting all the time
source: espnfc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 


Thu March 27, 2014
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Cool: old Yankees footage. Fark: from 1925. Uberfark: from the first game of Gehrig's streak
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
How long is the final minute of a 2014 NCAA Tournament game? So long you'd need six hours just to get through all of them so far
source: regressing.deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Facebook)
 
 
 
Farker's band, The biatchin' Aardvarks, needs your help to get into major radio contest. Voting is done via station's Facebook page
source: facebook.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(7)
 
(Fabulous Foods)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Does your sandwich look like whatever you find in the fridge? Are there precise ingredients that must be used with an exact order for optimal enjoyment? Show us what the proper sandwich looks like
source: fabulousfoods.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(166)
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Ten-part TV adaptation of Fargo debuts next month. For those who haven't see it, we got a trooper pulls someone over, we got a shooting, these folks drive by, there's a high-speed pursuit, ends here and then this execution-type deal
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(71)
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
House Democrats: For fark's sake, Issa, either shiat or get off the Benghazi pot. Either way, pay your damn tab, you deadbeat
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Nola.com)
 
 
 
And the states with America's most racially-segregated schools are...New York, Illinois, Michigan and California, and none of Fark's usual whipping-boy Southern states come close. Y'all put that in your NPR tote bag and smoke it, yankees
source: nola.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(222)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Florida kayaker goes on two hour tour... courtesy of a hammerhead shark, lives to tell about it. Fark bonus: Video included
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(30)
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Mom outraged as the former school security assistant who slept with her 15-year-old son freely walks out of court after guilty verdict. Fark: For the second time in a week
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
News: Before being shot to death by home-invaders, mom begged them not to hurt her daughter. Fark: The daughter who paid $10,000 to have her parents killed
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(The Atlantic Cities)
 
 
 
Another FARK ready headline: "Protesters Use Sex Dolls to Rally Against Spain's Anti-Abortion Law"
source: theatlanticcities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
Vice mayor of a small town in Arizona makes a pro-Fred Phelps post on Facebook. `We need more Fred Phelps in this world. May you rest in peace sir.'' How many times must the cannon balls fly, before Arizona gets its own Fark tag?
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 464: "Middle of the Night 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 


Wed March 26, 2014
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Nine-alarm fire in Boston's Back Bay area. Firefighters injured. Stay safe, farkers
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(119)
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
Joni grew up castrating hogs on an Iowa farm, so in Washington, she'll know how to cut pork
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
State lawmaker outraged to learn that schools are cutting back on science classes, introduces legislation to mandate that it be taught a minimum number of hours. Did subby say science? He meant a far more important subject: cursive writing
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(199)
 
(Sarnia Observer)
 
 
 
Not news: Cops do welfare check on a lady to only find her watching TV in her pajamas. News: She had been dead for over 6 months
source: theobserver.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Dem opponent of Chuck Grassley forced to apologize for his remark that "a Farmer who never practiced law" was unfit to be the next chairman of the Senate Judiciary Committee because it's somehow offensive to farmers to say they aren't lawyers
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
News: Thousands of Pepsi Max cans recalled in Sweden. Fark: Because they contained five percent alcohol
source: thelocal.se   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
The intersection of Men's Rights and My Little Pony, otherwise known as: the spend all day on FARK arguing thread
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(173)
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Asinine: WV girl forced out of Christian school because school administrators felt that her dress and behavior were too butch and did not "follow suit with her God-ordained {gender} identity," Fark: She is EIGHT years old. God hates..Tomboys? Really?
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(229)
 
(The Week)
 
 
 
Optical illusions, how do they farking work?
source: theweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(2)
 
(PBS)
 
 
 
I'll take "FARK Politics tab" for $1,000, Alex
source: pbs.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 


Tue March 25, 2014
(TSN)
 
 
 
News: Company wants the NHL to use its new puck design. Fark: It looks like a 2 year old tried to make a bat out of rubber and bounces around randomly
source: tsn.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(36)
 
(RYOT.org)
 
 
 
Icicles kill 100 people per year Russia. Hippos kill 2,900 people per year in Africa. Sex kills 11,000 people per year in the U.S. But the big killer, according to new data, is pollution, which kills 7 million people every year. Holy fark
source: ryot.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(CBS Minnesota)
 
 
 
Typical: Police spot man driving drunk, Extra: on the sidewalk, Fark: In a stolen excavator
source: minnesota.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(The New Yorker)
 
 
 
It was only a matter of time: Right's new "Welfare Queens" are the middle class. Lousy takers
source: newyorker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(142)
 
(KLTV Tyler)
 
 
 
News: Hazmat team responds to clear dangerous liquid spilled by an overturned truck. Fark: Milk
source: kltv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Seamen spilled near Lesbos, explosion victim pulls herself together, and Orange crushed: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 3/16 - 3/22
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(5)
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
How hard is it to find a plane in the middle of an ocean? Turns out that it's pretty farking hard
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Hasbro opens up Monopoly rules for modifications. Article to the left, your Fark suggestions for new rules to the right. Tag is in memory of the best game piece
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Rush Limbaugh is #1 and #4 on the New York Times bestseller list. Fark: children's books
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Has Wal-Mart become a welfare queen after revealing it is dependent on food stamps?
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(512)
 


Mon March 24, 2014
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Not news: D.C. woman calls for an ambulance. News: Paramedics start to argue. FARK: She takes the Metro to the Hospital
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(Click2Houston)
 
 
 
Texas cop gets a ticket from a 14-year-old girl for parking in a fire lane. FARK: She does NOT get TAZED
source: click2houston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(128)
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
Not news: More "Lord of the Rings" unused footage. Fark: From the 1978 Ralph Bakshi animated version
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 


Sun March 23, 2014
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Bill Maher is hard at work trying to find the worst member of Congress. So far, he has it narrowed down to 435 suspects in the House and 100 in the Senate. This may take a while
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Damn, it's Saturday already. One more notch on the bedpost for Livingston Stapler Company Presents, 2 hours of music hosted live by a farker in Juneau, Alaska. LGT stream
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(266)
 


Sat March 22, 2014
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Not news: Driver charged with DUI. Reason Fark has a Florida tag: Bicyclist charged with DUI
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(Regina Leader-Post)
 
 
 
"After being cut by the Chicago Bears, Julius Peppers agreed to join the Green Bay Packers. The transaction earned this headline at Fark.com..." (second paragraph)
source: leaderpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(5)
 
(Wisconsin Gazette)
 
 
 
Fark is a veritable wiki of the weird: "There's value in humor, value in our need to be entertained"
source: wisconsingazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(4)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
A list of the 54 failed attempts to repeal FartbongoCare
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(68)
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Pope Francis names the first members of council to advise him on sex abuse policy. Fark: Council includes an Irish woman who was abused by a priest
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(139)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Florida couple married for 45 years dies minutes apart. Which isn't unusual in Florida except in this case it didn't involve a gun or a trip to the farmers market
source: articles.sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Illinois State Representative Keith Farnham (D - umbass) wins primary, resigns "for serious health issues" Fark: His computers, even from work, are seized in kiddie porn investigation
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(125)
 
(KXLH Helena)
 
 
 
Cool: starting your school day over breakfast with Montana's governor. Cooler: he brings along a friend who draws sketches for you. Holy Fark: it's the Dude, and he won't abide kids going hungry
source: kxlh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 


Fri March 21, 2014
(CBS News)
 
 
 
More than half of the cigarettes sold in New York State are smuggled in from other places. Fark: Like the Ukraine, and China
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
NYC Fark Party - Mar 21
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Newser)
 
 
 
News: 'Unseen' John Lennon letter expected to sell for up to $9,900. Fark: It's about pee
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(BusinessWeek)
 
 
 
News: Health insurance companies are starting to revise their profit forecasts because of Obamacare. FARK: Upwards
source: businessweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(111)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
It's Friday, and that means it's time. Oh yes, it's time for the Fark Weird News Quiz. Now with zero calories
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
ABC affiliate reads Fark
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(Buffalo News)
 
 
 
Analysis of combined state and local tax burdens finds that New Yorkers pay on average $9700/yr, the nation's highest burden, not including the Fark Politics Tab Perpetual Punchline surcharge
source: blogs.buffalonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(100)
 


Thu March 20, 2014
(Chron)
 
 
 
Not news: Guy killed after falling from a hotel balcony during spring break. Fark: he was there acting as the chaperone for his daughter and her friends
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Fark: Woman with chest pains steals heart of Good Samaritan. Farker: Woman faking chest pains steals $60 from Good Samaritan
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
A plugin to display your browsing history as a grid of favicons ... fark fark porn fark fark feedly fark fark fark
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 
(Some Food Nut)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Do you bake your own bread? Use a sponge to get started? What about pita and naan? Get out your bakers' mitts and stand mixers. Show us the dough
source: kingarthurflour.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(232)
 
(Inventorspot)
 
 
 
Chinese farmer cruises through town riding giant hogzilla, can park wherever he wants
source: inventorspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Cool: researchers uncover an unpublished paper by Einstein containing a previously unknown theory as to the nature of the universe. Sad: It's wrong. Fark: because he added on one line of the equation where he should have subtracted instead
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(WTSP)
 
 
 
News: City elects country's first transgender mayor. Fark: Who then proceeds to sell his shoes to make money for said city
source: wtsp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Den Of Geek)
 
 
 
First trailer for FX's upcoming "Fargo." Watch Martin Freeman with an American accent, or whatever the heck they call that dialect up there, doncha know
source: denofgeek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
WWII gun tower with no running water, toilet or parking sells for £200,000. On the positive side, you get to live in a motherfarking gun tower (pics)
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(58)
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Fark Final Four Challenge, group name Fark-tastic, password Fark, Fail tag because most of us will
source: games.espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(Blabbermouth)
 
 
 
Celtic Frost offered $145,000 for one hour gig at the world's biggest heavy metal fest, turns it down. Fark: ummm, well, let the singer/guitarist explain that. Dumbass tag explodes
source: blabbermouth.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 463: "Urban Art 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 


Wed March 19, 2014
(UPI)
 
 
 
Scrap dealer buys golden egg for $13,000 intending to sell it for scrap. meh: He couldn't find a buyer and holds onto it. Fark: googles the name "Vacheron Constantin" that was in it. Ultrafark: It's one of the missing Faberge eggs
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 
(Charlotte Observer)
 
 
 
Rev. Billy Graham's kid: Putin is 'better' on gay issues than Obama. Fark: yes, he meant LGBT crackdowns-what did you think he meant?
source: charlotteobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
Not News: Homeowners Association make woman remove unauthorized banner. Fark: Pink ribbon for breast cancer awareness. Fark: Inside her own home
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(164)
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Fark-ready headline: "Voodoo meth priest guided massive Central Florida drug ring with prophecies"
source: thesent.nl   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(CBS Baltimore)
 
 
 
Washington Nationals criticized by FAA for using a drone to take spring training pictures. San Francisco Giants immediately see it as the only way to get a camera far enough away to get Barry Bonds' head in the shot
source: baltimore.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
FARC Commander pleads guilty to kidnapping Americans, chaining them to desks to write content for his website. CAN I AT LEAST GET A BATHROOM BREAK?
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 
(National Defense Magazine)
 
 
 
US Army says, "Well, fark it. We're going to 4-D printing"
source: nationaldefensemagazine.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(59)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Family who were trapped in the bedroom by their cat have sent the cat to a shelter, hopefully where it can be adopted by people who aren't farking morons
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(85)
 


Tue March 18, 2014
(Marshfield News Herald)
 
 
 
Teacher's aide decides to educate a couple of students about the dangers of alcohol. Fark: By getting drunk with them, sideswiping a car at the local McDonald's, and getting arrested in the school parking lot
source: marshfieldnewsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
You're taking a labor dispute too far when you secretly pour elk urine in the ventilation system of a manager's car
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 
(RYOT.org)
 
 
 
An abandoned baby squirrel found a new home. Fark: In a girl's ponytail
source: ryot.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(People Style Watch)
 
 
 
Time for everyone's favorite fill in the blank game, Fark Libs: Keira Knightley said her "wedding dress got 'quite impressively splattered' with ____"
source: stylenews.peoplestylewatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
News: French train company will not be allowed to bid on Washington DC construction project. Fark: Until it pays reparations for transporting 76,000 French Jews and other undesirables to Nazi concentration camps
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(186)
 
(Right This Minute)
 
 
 
'16 and Pregnant' Star Farrah Abraham Is blowing haters... away
source: rightthisminute.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
As proof even MIT farks up once in a while, its experts rate Avril Lavigne as the most famous Canadian
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 
(Cape - Gazette)
 
 
 
Self-penned obituary achieves international attention with the help of FARK - "And the popular FARK.com website featured it as the obit of the day"
source: capegazette.villagesoup.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(6)
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Millennials are using cash far more often than credit cards in the wake of recent security breaches and the realization that they don't make enough money to have credit cards in the first place
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(242)
 
(Topeka Capital-Journal)
 
 
 
Topeka Farkers keep your doggies safe, unknown person throwing bags filled with rat poison from white van into people's yards - 15 deaths reported
source: m.cjonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 


Mon March 17, 2014
(Fark)
 
 
 
Ear bite victim waives hearing, tampon flasks for smuggling Bloody Marys, and Cthulhu yoga: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 3/9 - 3/15
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(2)
 
(Some Tomato)
 
 
 
News: Pro-evolution Christian writes that Cosmos's sloppy handling of religion is simply fueling more nonsense like evolution-free homeschooling and Creation Museums. Fark: Written by the creator of VeggieTales
source: christianitytoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(325)
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Man arrested after hiding poultry in his pants and leaving the supermarket. You keep farking that chicken
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(24)
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Neil deGrasse Tyson debates an articulate, and presumably sober, Farker
source: sploid.gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Escapist Magazine)
 
 
 
Canadian PS4 price increase because Fark you, mapleheads
source: escapistmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Northern Territory News)
 
 
 
Today's Fark-ready headline: Brothels rub prostitutes the wrong way
source: ntnews.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
80-year-old woman amasses 20,000 Instagram followers as she documents her battle with cancer. And so far, she's not just kicking cancer's ass, she's dancing on it (pics, video)
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(22)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
You can help save the Amazon and become a cocaine farmer at the same time
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(5)
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
You know the only thing more terrifying than having a giant huntsman spider jump out of your luggage when you return from a trip to Africa? Having a giant pregnant huntsman spider jump out of your luggage (pics, but farkfarkfark giant spider)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(159)
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Listen up you dirty hippies, one of the realities of pot farming is that you kill lots of things
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Fark continues to save comedians a lot of time they used to spend writing their own jokes: "I'll go on Fark.com to see if there's any weird things going on. Some of the things these guys get, I don't know where they get them from"
source: blog.seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(0)
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Fark: New York Yankees get no-hit. Farkier: By the Miami Marlins
source: espn.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
The high school dance is becoming obsolete, with these damn kids today preferring to just drink and fark without all the needless pageantry and expense
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(87)
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Chinese farmer builds his own helicopter out of scrap parts in hopes of flying, getting on Fark
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 


Sun March 16, 2014
(Anniston Star)
 
 
 
This is why you can't have nice things, Alabama: "(Joseph) McCarthy didn't go far enough," or how the Common Core is a Communist plot against all true, red-blooded Americuns, dagnabbit
source: annistonstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(171)
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Ugly ass baby gorilla born at San Diego Zoo's Safari Park
source: animals.io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(8)
 
(Amazon)
 
 
 
Farker Knight of the Woeful Countenance released another book in his series: The Twelve Stones. It's called Petrichor and it's free for those with Amazon Prime
source: amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(7)
 
(Indiegogo)
 
 
 
"A Really Hip Plan To Repair The Van": Musician Farker is raising money through crowdsourcing to customize van for a bandmates father that was recently paralyzed
source: indiegogo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1)
 
(Townhall)
 
 
 
Drug testing welfare recipients "seems like a great way for the state to spend a minimal amount in order to save the system a lot of money", or at least it does if you ignore all the other states where it didn't
source: townhall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Russia vetoes UN Security Council resolution on Ukraine because of course they farking did, did anyone at the UN with more than two brain cells think anything else would happen?
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(Rocketnews 24)
 
 
 
Fark food thread: Japan introduces the Pizza Burger (meat patty, fried egg, veg, bacon bits, fried onion, cheese sprinkles, and demi-glace sauce on top of a traditional focaccia pizza base) - What's your favorite weird international cuisine?
source: en.rocketnews24.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Bleacher Report)
 
 
 
Here's a cool story about the life of Andre the Giant. Why is this on the sports tab? Because FARK you that's why
source: bleacherreport.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Call to action, Fark Nation
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(126)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Happy Purim. For all Gentiles on Fark, that's the Jewish holiday which is part St. Patty's, part Halloween, part Thanksgiving, and part Jews Go Crazy day. Now where subby's booze
source: theyeshivaworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
Sappy: Mother rallies community to raise funds for her dying six-year-old son so he can take trip to Disneyland. Asinine: It was all a scam. Sick-Fark: Mother had son convinced he really had cancer and would be dead within a year
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 
(KTOO Juneau)
 
 
 
Coming up at the top of the hour, the "This is totally not a cafe thread" goodness of the Livingston Stapler Company Presents radio show, featuring eclectic music madness from our third-favorite Alaskan farker. (Listen Live link)
source: ktoo.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(97)
 


Sat March 15, 2014
(WTFark)
 
Video
 
WTFark: Farkin' Florida Fridays Meet Julio, the guy who chased burglars out of his Florida home in the nude, with a shovel
source: ora.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(6)
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
The hair? The clothes? The choreography? Fark all that. A great song--'I'll Be Good To You' from The Brothers Johnson, 1976
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(4)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Skyday's Birthday Bash/Houston Fark Party Saturday March 15th
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Annual Fark Boston Pub Crawl - Saturday 3/15
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(75)
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Congo attempts to launch a rat into space. What the FARK??? CONGO has a space program?
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 
(KTVU Bay Area News)
 
 
 
Bad: Crashing your car on the way to your driver's license test. Worse: It's your third attempt. Fark: You crashed into the DMV building, causing a gas leak that closes the office for the rest of the day
source: ktvu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 


Fri March 14, 2014
(CBS Chicago)
 
 
 
Not news: Man protests closing of a rest stop. Weird: It was the place he was conceived, Fark: After a Phil Collins concert
source: chicago.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
And now, that special time when you get to sit in your chair and squint at a bunch of nonsensical words that don't seem to make sense together. No, not Finnegans Wake. It's the Fark Weird News Quiz
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Not news: A guy is selling sunglasses previously owned by Paul Walker. Farking sick news: The sunglasses were looted from the wreckage of Paul Walker's crash
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(The Inquirer)
 
 
 
The good news: Microsoft's XBox One is selling at a record pace. Bad news: Still lagging far behind Sony's Playstation 4
source: theinquirer.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(210)
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
An interview with Neil DeGrasse Tyson during which he's drinking wine, because he's a classy motherfarker
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Photobucket)
 
 
 
Ok, Fark: we all know and love Studman, but that pic is from about 5 site refreshes ago. Let's update him so his look is more current
source: i290.photobucket.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
For fark's sake. Vaccinate your children, Jay Cutler
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 


Thu March 13, 2014
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Wells Fargo quite literally wrote the manual on how to evict people from homes for which the bank didn't hold a legal mortgage
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 
(Food.com)
 
 
 
Fark Food Thread: Here come's St. Patrick's Day... when everyone's Irish and the booze is flowing. What are you eating and drinking to celebrate?
source: food.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(104)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
8 Baby names riding the next "cool wave".... Peresphone? Cordis? Oh for fark's sake...really people
source: shine.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(361)
 
(YouTube)
 
Video
 
Farkers, your dream job has arrived. Hudson Whiskey is looking for a brand ambassador
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(35)
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Dear Prudence, we took in a foreign exchange student, and now my hubby is farking her after school. Should I turn him into the police or ask if he wants a three-way with me and Lolita?
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(248)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Strange: Judge denies bail to Illinois man accused of shoplifting. Holy Fark: because he is accused of shoplifting nearly $7 MILLION worth of merchandise
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(34)
 
(AP)
 
 
 
Schlafly Beer and Phyllis Schlafly fight over who gets to trademark the family name. I'm guessing most Farkers will support the former for one or more reasons
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(56)
 
(Adam Carolla)
 
 
 
Drew Curtis discusses Patent Trolls and Fark on Adam Carolla's podcast
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(76)
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Police officer who was jailed for three months after stabbing two firefighters and shooting at a third says there should have been warning labels on an antibiotic that briefly turned him psychotic. Fark: He got his job back as a police officer
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(53)
 
(Deadline)
 
 
 
Ray Bradbury's classic horror novel "Something Wicked This Way Comes" gets movie greenlight. Fark: From noted purveyor of horror films, Disney Studios. UltraFark: Again
source: deadline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 
(Amazon)
 
 
 
TotalFarker has created a 501c3 charity to support job certification and training for Veterans. You can support them now just by shopping at Amazon. Link to their not for profit page on Amazon is in first thread post
source: smile.amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
Netflix and Amazon added to goods that make up consumer inflationary index while TiVos dropped; TotalFark remains steady at $5 because we don't believe in economics
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(2)
 
(Honolulu Star Advertiser)
 
 
 
Judge rated unqualified for State Supreme Court for "work ethic concerns, lack of professionalism in the workplace, and questions concerning the propriety of conduct toward women" Fark: Senate Committee continues with his confirmation hearing anyway
source: staradvertiser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Missouri GOP has an idea that is sure to beat the Kansas GOP: Amend the state constitution to shield puppy mills under a "right to farm" amendment
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 462: "Dirty Dirty Pictures 2". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 


Wed March 12, 2014
(Tech Crunch)
 
 
 
What is best in life? To finally possess my own farking tank with which I can crush things, see them driven before me
source: techcrunch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(Eye on Annapolis)
 
 
 
City Council is no place to be passing around notes, Mayor. Especially one thanking the Alderman for farking you
source: eyeonannapolis.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(26)
 
(RYOT.org)
 
 
 
A killer elephant bulldozed a bunch of homes in an Indian village. Fark: Then kindly rescued a baby from under the rubble
source: ryot.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 
(JSOnline)
 
 
 
Not news: Police officer resigns. News: After threat of firing over sexting. Fark: With his wife
source: jsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
FARK.com - New Liberal Bastion?
source: objectivistliving.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1809)
 
(Trebuchet Magazine)
 
 
 
New saliva tests help employers figure out how far they can push workers before they die of stress. Whoops, we meant 'help workers better cope'. Obviously
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(10)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Turns out the original 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre' was not inspired by Ed Gein, but by every Farker's fantasy while shopping during the holiday season
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(9)
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Fox News came into my house, farted on my couch, and ate all the pepperoni off my pizza
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)