Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		Teabaggers conduct a civil, high-minded conversation at todays protest at the capitol, just kidding, they shout the n-word at congressman John Lewis, a civil-rights hero  (huffingtonpost.com)	(429)
		Not news: Constituent calls Congressman's office to voice his opinion on health care. News: Staffer hangs up, calls Capital Police on him. Fark: Capital Police tells staffer to STFU and take the call  (biggovernment.com)	(89)

		Republican Congressman denounces "War of Yankee Aggression" on the floor of the House of Representatives  (yglesias.thinkprogress.org)	(120)
		Rep. Steve Cohen (D-Tenn.) educates all the old squares in Congress and all the emo whippersnappers on You Tube with an emotional tribute to his friend Alex Chilton on the House floor  (youtube.com)	(22)
		While everyone was arguing about Healthcare reform, Congress quietly proposed the biggest deficit reduction bill since 1993  (dailykos.com)	(310)
		Arguing in favor of "Don't Ask, Don't Tell," former NATO SAC tells Congress that gay Dutch soldiers directly caused the 1995 Srebrenica Genocide. Here comes the sci- Wait, what?  (wonkroom.thinkprogress.org)	(83)

Thousands, or possibly less than 300, enraged Tea Partiers descend on the offices of the evil Congressional Democrats who are destroying their country and ..well, find them terribly polite and quite nice actually  (politico.com)

(143)

		The sage grouse is facing extinction. Congressman Jacob Chaffetz of Utah (R-d) "The only place the sage grouse belongs is on the menu of a French bistro"  (nytimes.com)	(44)
		Taliban cleric calls for overthrow of US government. What's that? I'm sorry; make that "US Congressman Steve King calls for overthrow of US government."  (tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(158)

(Some Guy)

Flight Attendants want Congress to limit carry-on bag size because people are not wanting to pay for baggage. If only there was some way to have the same outcome without legislation, perhaps a repeal of some prior policy  (kstp.com)

(202)

WASP (Women Airforce Service Pilots) of World War 2 finally recognized after 60 years with the Congressional Gold Medal. Subby has something in his eye  (examiner.com)

(77)

Conservatives demand a new constitutional amendment to force Congress to be subject to the health care laws they pass. Unaware of section 1312 of said bill, which does that already. But no matter, FIX OLD NO NEW  (voices.washingtonpost.com)

(94)

		According to the nonpartisan Congressional Budget Office, Obama's health reform initiative will increase the deficit by $118 billion. What's that? I'm sorry, that's DECREASE the deficit by $118 billion  (rawstory.com)	(402)
		Most ethical Congress ever blocks further investigation into Rep. Massa scandal  (news.yahoo.com)	(92)

According to a new AP poll, Obama is more popular than Congress, Roman Polanski, lepers, swine flu, hurtz donuts, Toyota engineers  (news.yahoo.com)

(210)

		Cisco just invented a new router that can download the entire Library of Congress in one second, every movie ever made in four minutes, all the porn on the internet in 69 years    (finance.yahoo.com)	(88)
		Former Rep. Eric Massa (D-NY) accomplished little in his year-plus in Congress, sexually harassed a male staffer and was pressured to resign. So, naturally, Beck and Limbaugh consider him a hero  (politico.com)	(45)

With out of control spending and approval ratings in the teens, Rep. Ann Kirkpatrick (D), introduces a bill to cut congress salaries by 5%  (foxnews.com)

(90)

		Good news: only 36,000 people lost their jobs today. Bad news: members of congress still employed  (voices.kansascity.com)	(51)
		Now that Israel and Turkey are all pissy at each other, Turkey can't get the U.S. pro-Israeli lobby to ensure the U.S. congress doesn't accuse Turkey of an Armenian Genocide  (jpost.com)	(59)

		What your children will learn in history class: "Single-term President Barack Obama sacrificed his second term to push Health Care through Congress for the benefit of the American people"  (reuters.com)	(392)
		Thanks, Congress. Toyota's now so desperate for customers it's offering 0 percent financing, and American car companies have to follow, eliminating all the interest they earn, and badly need, from financing loans  (theatlantic.com)	(109)

Obama adopts several GOP ideas from healthcare summit in his proposal to congresss. GOP outraged because, well, BECAUSE because. That's why  (content.usatoday.com)

(229)

		Disgraced congressman Mark Foley is now selling his furniture in order to pay the bills. Apparently there is an "array of elephant-themed paraphernalia, no doubt bittersweet reminders of Foley's political past"  (tpmlivewire.talkingpointsmemo.com)	(40)
		Congressional candidate Barb Davis White (R-MN): "Rosa Parks did not move to the front of the bus to support sodomy."  (andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com)	(192)

WellPoint CEO testifies before Congressional Death Panel. The execution was televised    (abcnews.go.com)

(50)

		If you had 11 days in the "How long will it take Congress to ignore the new PAYGO law" pool, collect your prize  (washingtontimes.com)	(111)
		2/3 of Americans think that the Republicans in Congress are not doing enough to cooperate with President Obama, according to an new national poll that was obviously produced by the liberal, Obama-loving media  (cnn.com)	(236)

Toyota to tell Congress that it's not electronics causing acceleration problems, but floor mats and gas pedals and cementheads who step on the wrong pedal  (nytimes.com)

(223)

Union and liberal groups decry "small, puny" $15 billion jobs bill, want Congress to shake taxpayers upside-down until at least $180 billion falls out  (thehill.com)

(211)

Ric Romero enters national health care discussion. "Current health care proposals in Congress have not been finalized. In the meantime, consumers can turn to the Internet to shop for health insurance"  (abclocal.go.com)

(15)

Why does Democratic Congressman Keith Ellison refuse to meet with the man who called him "more dangerous to American values than terrorist attacks?" What are you trying to hide Mr. Ellison?  (corner.nationalreview.com)

(86)

Kim Jong-il urged to run for Rep. John Murtha's vacant congressional seat  (content.usatoday.com)

(96)

		It took the AP less than 24 hours to tie the Seattle cop shooter to Mike Huckabee, but they still haven't tied the Alabama prof. shooter to a Democrat Congressman who let her off after she shot her brother  (newsbusters.org)	(149)
		Title: "Pondering a Congress without the Kennedy family" Subtext: Do you really want Massachusetts representatives being *sober* during their votes?  (boston.com)	(31)
(Youngstown Vindicator)		James Traficant could be dipping his toe into the pool of congressional candidates this fall. No word yet if he will run as an independent or Wig    (vindy.com)	(32)

GOP strategy: Tie up Senate to make Americans sick of Congress so they will elect more Republicans. And it just might work  (dailykos.com)

(114)

Patrick Kennedy announces retirement, meaning that 2011 will be the first year since 1947 that no Kennedys are in Congress  (washingtonpost.com)

(102)

(Senate.gov)		A running track of all the filibusters so far this Congress. Come for the Credit Cardholders' Bill of Rights Act, stay for the Revolutionary War and War of 1812 Battlefield Protection Act  (senate.gov)	(67)
(The Star Press)		Remember how the Democrats in Congress would say that raising the minimum wage would help Americans and actually create jobs? Um, yeah, about that  (thestarpress.com)	(180)

You don't have to be a rocket scientist to see that the IQ of Congress will drop another 80% this fall with the retirement of its only nuclear physicist representative  (congress.blogs.foxnews.com)

(42)

		Congress can only agree on one thing these days: that weenie in the White House calling for bipartisanship is getting in the way of their bickering and he should really stop that  (washingtontimes.com)	(111)
		You know that big GOP congressional landslide that's supposed to happen in 2010? Well new polling data shows that Latino voters will decide at least 40 races next year. Looks like the GOP picked the wrong decade to play the xenophobia card  (news.yahoo.com)	(549)

"Passing health reform without any Republican votes is an electoral suicide pact and should not be an option."  (realclearpolitics.com)

(153)

No, Obama is not going to do any more British parliament-style open question forums for congressmen, because it makes too much sense and is too informative to the American public, and they're not ready for that  (huffingtonpost.com)

(88)

Rahm Emmanuel will host a group of special needs people at the White House. The hard part will be telling them apart from the Congressional delegations    (blogs.wsj.com)

(74)

Congress set to pass law requiring pilots to live where they work. You know, like plantation workers before the civil war  (businessweek.com)

(48)

(Some Guy)

New musical about teenage sexuality, featuring nudity and simulated sex acts, opens in Fort Myers. Surprisingly, some people have a problem with this  (winknews.com)

(54)

		"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof*" *offer only applies to monotheists in CA  (stltoday.com)	(198)
		Top ranking Republican admits they have no interest in bipartisanship. Congressional Dems will still grovel for approval  (politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com)	(507)

		Obama meets with congressional Republicans; Fark political thread breaks out  (foxnews.com)	(365)
		Having closed Guantanamo, convinced Congress to repeal Don't Ask Don't Tell, and persuaded Iran to drop its nuclear program, Obama plans to get Justice Department to investigate the BCS  (seattlepi.com)	(54)

		The Senate took a vote on requiring Congress not to pass legislation that it can't pay for. All 40 Republicans voted no  (yglesias.thinkprogress.org)	(291)
(Some Guy)		Taking the next logical step in Corporate Personhood, the Murray Hill Corporation is running directly for congress  (murrayhillweb.com)	(122)

Supreme Court Justice Alito's "You Lie" moment during the SOTU (w/ video)  (politico.com)

(681)

Come and listen to a story 'bout a man named........Lester Flatt; original Bluegrass Boy and genre master honored by congress  (npr.org)

(10)

(Some Guy)

Most jobs you get in trouble for spending your time on Facebook, but apparently Congressional Republicans are avid Farmville players  (politifact.com)

(85)

		Fearing campaign funding will get worse after SCOTUS decision, corporate CEOs tell Congress to quit calling them for contributions, to publically fund elections instead  (abcnews.go.com)	(151)
		"You won't have any more senators from Kansas or Oregon, you'll have senators from Cheekies and Exxon. Maybe we'll have to wear corporate logos like Nascar drivers" said the Congressman  (rawstory.com)	(466)

NFL players ask Congress to help prevent a lockout in 2011. Hey, it's not like Congress has more important things to do  (sports.yahoo.com)

(15)

		Six logical fallacies that cost you money every day. List would have been 1,000,006 logical fallacies that cost you money every day, but authors opted not to mention Congress  (cracked.com)	(339)
		Researchers say bacteria have complex decision-making abilities. Right. They say that about Congress, too    (upi.com)	(27)

President Obama plans on asking Congress for an even bigger war budget than President Bush. Suck it Nobel Committee  (news.yahoo.com)

(256)

Congress stimulates the economy. Only it was Copenhagen's economy  (drudgereport.com)

(121)

That's a nice Congressional seat you got there. It'd be a shame if anything happened to it  (nypost.com)

(73)

Just 32 percent of voters believe their congressman is representing their best interests, while the other 68 percent aren't lobbyists for agriculture or defense industries  (rasmussenreports.com)

(26)

Problem: You're a Blue Dog Democratic Congressman from Alabama. Solution: Switch parties. Problem: You're a Republican Congressman from Alabama and your entire staff has resigned because you switched parties  (dailykos.com)

(115)

		"The Constitution does not give Congress the power to require that Americans purchase health insurance."  (online.wsj.com)	(651)
		Skipping what has become a 40-year tradition, Chief Justice Roberts acknowledges the many "fellow citizens... touched by hardship," declines to ask for a raise for (underpaid) federal judges in his annual report  (washingtonpost.com)	(60)

Congressmen brag that they oppose the "failed" stimulus then take credit for stimulus money sent to their districts. Obvious trumps amusing, asinine, fail, ironic, sad, and sick  (thinkprogress.org)

(109)

GOP Congressman has no explanation for GOP hypocrisy  (tpmlivewire.talkingpointsmemo.com)

(148)

Twenty-five new films added to the Library of Congress's film registry, including Dog Day Afternoon, Pillow Talk, Michael Jackson's Thriller, and for some inexplicable reason, The Muppet Movie  (variety.com)

(95)

National Republican Congressional Committee chairman to billionaire Ponzi schemer: "I love you and believe in you"  (dailykos.com)

(90)

Washington influence peddlers on track to shatter last year's record $3.3 billion spent lobbying Congress. That's change we hoped we wouldn't have to believe in  (politico.com)

(41)

New Jersey asks MTV to cancel Jersey Shore. Rest of the country asks Congress to cancel New Jersey  (msnbc.msn.com)

(66)

Census data shows Minnesota might lose a Congressional seat. We, the citizens of Minnesota, hereby offer up Michele Bachmann for this sacrifice  (startribune.com)

(149)

		Freshman Dem congressman from VA: "My ultimate goal is not to get reelected. It's to know that I did the best damn job I could representing the people of the 5th District and making a difference."  (washingtonpost.com)	(107)
		Another Congressman switches parties. He's going from Democrat to Republican. Wait, really? :checks: Yup, really  (politico.com)	(234)
		Island of Vanatu was populated 3,000 years by people without heads, making them the root genetic ancestors of... members of Congress? Dancing with the Stars viewers? Sports fans in Philadelphia? So many jokes, so little headline  (sciencedaily.com)	(37)
(Science Magazine)		President Obama will ask Congress to give NASA an additional $1 Billion next year for its manned spaceflight program  (blogs.sciencemag.org)	(158)

Democrats' 2010 election strategy is as fresh as their legislative ideas: Blame Bush  (tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com)

(180)

Paul Krugman, August, 2009: "Congressmen hanged in effigy... is something new and ugly." Paul Krugman, December, 2009: "By all means, hang Senator Joe Lieberman in effigy."  (reason.com)

(249)

		The national debt has, "at least numerically," surpassed the new limit set by Congress just last week. "At least numerically"? Do we owe New Zealand a couple billion tons of sheep or something, too?  (cbsnews.com)	(165)
		Obama warns that if Congress doesn't pass Obamacare, the nation's going to go bankrupt. What he didn't mention is that if we don't reduce the deficit and cut spending it's going to go bankrupt regardless  (online.wsj.com)	(215)

		Bill introduced in Congress that would rescind the automatic Congressional pay raise slated for 2011  (thehill.com)	(73)
		Three things Obama and Congress can do now to save jobs: Repeal sugar subsidies, end prevailing wage requirements, and reduce the minimum wage. They could also enact the Don't Hold Your Breath Act of 2009  (washingtonpost.com)	(395)

		Dear Congressman, your office is too inconveniently located for us to protest at. Please move it to a better location so we can more easily call you a Marxist. Sincerely yours, teabaggers  (thehill.com)	(74)
		Congress: "Maybe we shouldn't give taxpayer money to ACORN to give to pimps." Liberal Activist Judges: "LOL, nice try, here's some cash, ACORN." Citizens: "Uh, what about democracy?"  (salon.com)	(196)

Talk about damning with faint praise: Joe Biden calls Chris Dodd (D-irty rotten scoundrel) "the single-most gifted legislator in Congress"  (politico.com)

(23)

(Some McK)

That survey you filled out on Facebook/Myspace games that gave you free in-game currency was used to send an e-mail to congress asking them to oppose health care reform  (businessinsider.com)

(73)

		And these are the people we trust to "reform" health care? Congress passes rules to stop lobbyist-paid junkets, then gets around them through loopholes  (nytimes.com)	(40)
		"It took nearly 150 years for Congress to pass a resolution apologizing for slavery. We should apologize now to future generations for what we've done and are doing to America."  (townhall.com)	(134)

Pollster: When I asked "Who comes to mind when you think of Congress?" you responded "Satan". Why is that? Citizen: "Because I wasn't sure of the correct spelling of "Beelzebub"  (nationaljournal.com)

(42)

		Congressman Bennie Thompson (D-umbass-MS) is involved in an extortion plot involving credit card companies. Priceless  (msnbc.msn.com)	(44)
		Democrats in Congress: Hey, we'd like to co-sponsor your joke amendment to the health reform bill forcing Congress onto the public option, because we think the public option is actually pretty good. Republicans: Psych  (thinkprogress.org)	(162)

		Mammogram debate prompts cleavage in Congress  (news.yahoo.com)	(68)
		That change you were looking for has arrived as it is now apparently OK for Executive branch employees to refuse to testify before Congress  (thecaucus.blogs.nytimes.com)	(410)
		Imelda Marcos registers to run for Philippines congress. Observers say she is a shoe-in    (news.bbc.co.uk)	(24)

(CFO.com)		Congress allows companies to hide losses and use accounting tricks for another decade. What could possibly go wrong?  (cfo.com)	(21)
		If you're going to piss off the President of the United States by crashing his first State Dinner you might as well get in some practice before hand by crashing the Congressional Black Caucus Awards Dinner  (myfoxdc.com)	(70)

		DoJ investigation of former AG Gonzales finds his testimony ""confusing," "incomplete' and had the "effect of misleading" both Congress and the public" but no charges will be filed  (rawstory.com)	(84)
		Tired of Wasilla getting all the mockery, Juneau couple break neighbors' window, taunt them, then have sex in front of them  (fdlreporter.com)	(38)