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Headlines matching 'cancer'
Fri February 10, 2012
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Mother Nature Network) Spiffy Scientists discover a drug designed to fight cancer reverses Alzheimer's in mice. Still no cure for cancer  (mnn.com) (65)
(The Macomb Daily) Weird Cutting out the middle man ... antiques dealer with late stage cancer hosting her own estate sale  (macombdaily.com) (44)
(Short List) Dumbass Scientists create a robot that needs to shiat. Meanwhile, cancer is still without a cure  (shortlist.com) (17)
(LA Times) Spiffy News: Scientists have found a drug that reverses Alzheimer's in mice within 72 hours Fark: the drug also cures cancer  (latimes.com) (27)


Mon February 06, 2012
(Daily Kos) Asinine Not news: Conservatives hate Planned Parenthood. WTF: 51% of them oppose them for cancer screenings too  (dailykos.com) (376)


Sun February 05, 2012
(Daily Mail) Stupid Moderate drinking, which was bad for you, then good for you, then bad for you, then good for you, then bad for you, then good for you, is now bad for you again, doubling your risk of pancreatitis and cancer of the bowel, mouth, throat and neck  (dailymail.co.uk) (61)


Fri February 03, 2012
(Gizmodo) Cool Scientists use deadly plant to create a cancer-killing grenade. But your Skyrim character is pretty impressive, too  (gizmodo.com) (32)
(Some Guy) Dumbass Susan Komen Foundation introduces pink handguns to promote Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Really  (wisconsingazette.com) (297)


Wed February 01, 2012
(Some Guy) Hero For most 9 year olds, cancer is the most terrifying thing in the world. For some, a transplant is even more so. Meet the only 9 year old who gave the finger not once but 6 times to her tumors  (boston.cbslocal.com) (61)
(The Atlantic Wire) Unlikely Tanning beds PREVENT cancer. And treat lupus and fibromyalgia. And skin cancer comes from sunscreen, anyway  (theatlanticwire.com) (84)
(Washington Post) Asinine Asinine tag trumps Boobies tag as the Susan G. Komen Foundation decides to combat breast cancer by cutting off funding for breast cancer screening  (washingtonpost.com) (132)
(MSNBC) Interesting FDA Approves first drug for inoperable skin cancer. Still no cure for... Lupus?  (vitals.msnbc.msn.com) (22)


Tue January 31, 2012
(Some Guy) Cool A brief TED talk on treating cancer with electric fields. Interesting as hell  (ted.com) (39)
(Telegraph) Interesting Tomatoes slow prostate cancer, but are incredibly messy to apply  (telegraph.co.uk) (24)
(Daily Mail) Followup About that female douchebag who dumped her cancer boyfriend and took the Super Bowl tickets? Yeah about that. Pro tip guys: You have to meet a woman more than once to consider yourself in a relationship  (dailymail.co.uk) (85)


Mon January 30, 2012
(Yahoo) Asinine Can a woman be a douchebag? This is important, because I'd hate to use the wrong word to refer to the woman who dumped her boyfriend when she found out he had bladder cancer, but still wanted to take his Super Bowl tickets  (news.yahoo.com) (168)


Sat January 28, 2012
(Westword) Sad Danny Williams, organizer of Great American Beer Festival and steward of 2,500-bottle beer mine, taps his last keg at age 52 after fight with cancer  (blogs.westword.com) (18)
(detroit news) Asinine Student grows his hair long to donate it to cancer survivor. School: "You're suspended"  (detroitnews.com) (225)


Fri January 27, 2012
(The Sun) Sick Four-year-old girl with cancer has accident at school. Because you're reading this on Fark, you can safely assume that her teacher was a scumbag about it  (thesun.co.uk) (130)


Thu January 26, 2012
(Some Guy) Obvious $600,000 later, doctors discover the cause of mysterious Morgellons Disease: It's all in your mind. Still no cure for cancer  (abclocal.go.com) (71)


Tue January 24, 2012
(Labspaces.net) Strange Scientists grow weary of trying to cure cancer, take time off to create magnetic soap  (labspaces.net) (19)
(Some Guy) Interesting New book claims you can prevent cancer by A: Taking baby aspirin? B: Eating lunch at the same time each day? C: Wearing better shoes? or D: All of the above?  (www2.macleans.ca) (61)


Mon January 23, 2012
(Reuters) Interesting South Korean Presidential candidate declares he is able to cure cancer by staring into people's eyes, moves ahead of Romney in the Republican primary polls  (reuters.com) (34)
(Yahoo) Sad LAPD detective Phillp Vanatter, who led the OJ Simpson investigation, has died at age 70 from cancer. However, cancer released a statement today denying involvement in Vanatter's death and vowing to find the real killer  (news.yahoo.com) (54)


Fri January 20, 2012
(Some unhip hopper) Cool Hip hop artist puts on concert to benefit ovarian cancer. Wait a minute. I thought we were against that  (minnesota.cbslocal.com) (36)


Tue January 17, 2012
(Some Guy) Hero Virginia Tech student plans to "race free from cancer." Well, we've tried everything else, maybe we can outrun it  (newsleader.com) (21)
(News.com.au) Amusing Researchers spot smiley face in cancer cell. Neener, neener  (news.com.au) (18)


Fri January 13, 2012
(Guardian) Asinine They can take away my bacon when they pry it from my cold, cancer-ey pancreas  (guardian.co.uk) (29)


Wed January 11, 2012
(KMOV St. Louis) Strange Cancer Barbie lets kids in on the fun of radiation and chemotherapy  (kmov.com) (60)
(Daily Mail) Cool Mother-of-six saves her own life by coughing up a cancerous tumor, ham sandwich, half a chicken and assorted bon-bons  (dailymail.co.uk) (76)
(medicalxpress.com) Weird All things being Equal, cancer cells feed on sugar-free diet  (medicalxpress.com) (27)


Tue January 10, 2012
(CNN) Sad A Hard Road Ahead: Black Sabbath guitarist diagnosed with cancer, and while Every Day Comes and Goes, nobody wants an Electric Funeral or to Die Young  (cnn.com) (43)


Mon January 09, 2012
(Some Guy) Cool Sad: 7-year-old boy has cancer. Cool: Make-A-Wish grants his wish. Freaking awesome: To blow up a building  (foxtoledo.com) (107)
(AP) Interesting New England Journal of Medicine celebrates 200 years of publishing key advances like anesthesia, cancer surgery, germ theory, Nazi eugenics, and organ transplants  (lowellsun.com) (46)
(Nuke The Fridge) Hero Two-fisted hero of viral video "Star Wars Nerd vs. Punk" bounces back from Stage 3 brain cancer, seeks tax-deductible donations to run Disney World marathon. Still no cure for Han firing first  (nukethefridge.com) (93)


Sun January 01, 2012
(Fox News) Followup Cancer found in 20 women who had faulty implants. So, still think these abominations are a good idea, ladies?  (foxnews.com) (187)


Fri December 30, 2011
(doubtful news) Spiffy Doubtful News credits FARK as the source for their story about the Hugo Chavez cancer conspiracy  (doubtfulnews.com) (0)
(skeptic) Spiffy Skeptic credits FARK as the source for their story about the Hugo Chavez cancer conspiracy  (skeptic.com) (0)


Thu December 29, 2011
(CNN) Asinine Chavez: I'm not saying Americans infected me with a cancer ray, but they infected me with a cancer ray  (cnn.com) (275)


Fri December 23, 2011
(Mirror.co.uk) Stupid A 300 year old mystery has been solved... elephants have 5 toes, not 6. And, we wonder why there is not a cure for cancer  (mirror.co.uk) (45)


Tue December 20, 2011
(Medical Daily Journal) Interesting Still no cure for cancer, but now scientists have found a way to keep tumors alive in the lab. The hard part was teaching the healthy cells to smoke  (medicaldaily.com) (7)


Thu December 15, 2011
(Fox News) Asinine Southern Baptist publisher recalls pink Bibles being sold to raise money for breast cancer awareness because the money raised was being used to fund breast cancer awareness  (foxnews.com) (304)


Wed December 14, 2011
(Some Guy) Interesting Scientists discover why buttercups glow when held up to your chin. Still no cure for cancer  (the-scientist.com) (8)


Mon December 12, 2011
(Jezebel) Cool 17-year-old girl invents nanoparticle that kills cancer. Still no cure for Fark memes  (jezebel.com) (314)


Sun December 11, 2011
(Daily Mail) Strange Van Morrison's 44-year old girlfriend and mother of his youngest child, Gigi Lee, dies of cancer. Michelle Rocca, Van's wife and mother of his two other children, can hopefully help Van deal with this tragedy  (dailymail.co.uk) (49)


Thu December 08, 2011
(Uproxx) Obvious Rick Perry's popularity level on the internet right now sits somewhere between Rebecca Black and cancer  (uproxx.com) (157)


Wed December 07, 2011
(Jezebel) Spiffy Obamacare opponent changes mind after realizing that Obamacare is gonna help her get treated for breast cancer  (jezebel.com) (333)
(Guardian) Asinine The British government has had enough of these lazy cancer sufferers, says if they're so sick and cancery they better prove it  (guardian.co.uk) (86)


Fri December 02, 2011
(jezebel.com) Scary Xeni Jardin live-tweets her first mammogram, is diagnosed with cancer  (jezebel.com) (132)


Wed November 30, 2011
(MSNBC) PSA This just in: Apple and grape juice cause cancer. Consider using beer and wine as safe alternatives  (today.msnbc.msn.com) (54)
(Nanowerk) Sad Good: putting zinc oxide on your nose helps prevent skin cancer. Bad: zinc oxide nanoparticles can create other cancers. In a related story, cancer is a relentless, cruel biatch  (nanowerk.com) (27)
(Politiken) Asinine Doctors: Okay, let's put the NATO Secretary General here to heal his broken arm. Patient: But what about me and my incurable cancer? Doctors: How about a nice windowless office?  (politiken.dk) (57)
(Fox News) Followup US Airways: Non-refundable means non-refundable. Go have cancer somewhere else  (radio.foxnews.com) (104)


Tue November 29, 2011
(Fox News) Interesting Viagra makes cancer-fighting cells bigger, longer and harder. Unfortunately, they fall asleep after four hours  (foxnews.com) (4)


Mon November 28, 2011
(PennLive) Cool Hershey Medical Center finds virus that sends cancer down the highway  (pennlive.com) (61)


Wed November 23, 2011
(BBC) Amusing Even if she lives to be 110 years old; even if she discovers a cure for cancer; even if she is the first human to set foot on Mars, one photo will follow this young woman to the grave  (bbc.co.uk) (154)
(USA Today) Spiffy Ignore that other story, cocaine won't keep your uterus cancer-free. For that you need Juan Valdez and his donkey  (yourlife.usatoday.com) (18)
(Some Guy) Asinine Thief steals gift basket being raffled off to raise money for a four-year-old cancer patient. Sees news reports of his asshattery, calls restaurant where raffle was held and tells them it can be found in their parking lot. Still a big asshat  (wtkr.com) (32)


Tue November 22, 2011
(The New York Times) Interesting Good news: Scientists may have found a legitimate way to significantly slow the aging process. Bad News: It won't help much until they find that cure for cancer we're always talking about  (nytimes.com) (13)


Fri November 18, 2011
(Newsday) News Cancer suffering from Joe Paterno  (newsday.com) (277)


Thu November 17, 2011
(Fark) Sad Farker Faethe died today at 8:10AM EST after a prolonged fight with cancer  (fark.com) (340)
(BBC) Obvious Recycling causes cancer  (bbc.co.uk) (4)
(Huffington Post) Silly We don't have flying cars, personal commuter jetpacks or a cure for cancer yet, but we do have bacon-flavored sexual lubricant, so yay science, I guess  (huffingtonpost.com) (38)


Tue November 15, 2011
(National Post) Strange Birth control pills may be linked to increased prostate cancer. I don't think you're using them right  (news.nationalpost.com) (89)


Sun November 13, 2011
(MSNBC) Sad Evelyn Lauder, who created the pink breast cancer awareness ribbon and raised $330 million for research, dies of ovarian cancer. I has a sad  (msnbc.msn.com) (151)
(News.com.au) Asinine Doctors remove 80% of man's stomach to fight cancer. Here's the part that he has trouble digesting: he never had cancer to begin with  (news.com.au) (88)


Fri November 11, 2011
(Komo) Asinine Telemarketing agency raises millions for breast cancer prevention, $10 million of which mysteriously disappears. Telemarketers ask to be taken off of investigator's call list  (komonews.com) (51)
(Daily Express) Cool Scottish researchers announce breakthrough in battle against skin cancer. Brits will finally be allowed out in the sun again, although it will be sad to see them lose the white glow they've refined over the centuries  (express.co.uk) (15)


Thu November 10, 2011
(Miami Herald) Interesting El Presidente Hugo Chávez's cancer is progressing faster than expected, may not live more than six months. Could this mean there's finally a cure for dictators?  (miamiherald.com) (163)


Mon November 07, 2011
(YouTube) Plug Farker Ronin is raising money to fight prostate cancer by growing a manly mustache for Movember  (youtube.com) (36)
(UPI) Followup Ass cancer caused by sitting on your ass  (upi.com) (11)
(People Magazine) Followup Muhammad Ali urges Joe Frazier to stick and move against liver cancer  (people.com) (22)


Thu November 03, 2011
(Mother Nature Network) Scary Remember when the TSA rolled out those nude x-ray machines and glossed over cancer concerns? Yeah, about that  (mnn.com) (163)


Wed November 02, 2011
(Some Guy) Asinine Controversial breast cancer awareness display of bras burned down in Kabul. Wait, did I say Kabul? I meant to say Bowling Green  (courier-journal.com) (59)
(MSNBC) Interesting 2,250 year old mummy has cancer. Probably won't survive  (msnbc.msn.com) (9)


Tue November 01, 2011
(BBC) Interesting Glowing brain tumour trial begins. Prosecutors vow to remove this cancer, and will ask for life  (bbc.co.uk) (25)
(io9) Silly Having solved AIDS, cancer, and world hunger; we can now focus on what really matters. Why do pigeons' throats shine so iridescently?  (io9.com) (30)
(Short List) Interesting Scientists say a full Kindle is a billionth of a billionth of a gram heavier than an empty one. Back to that niggling cancer conundrum, chaps?  (shortlist.com) (54)


Mon October 31, 2011
(Cleveland Plain Dealer) Obvious Eating too much sugar can lead to sagging skin, cancer, the overwhelming urge to shout "I'm cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs"  (cleveland.com) (114)


Sun October 30, 2011
(Science Daily) Scary Through-the-nipple breast cancer therapy OH GOD NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  (sciencedaily.com) (26)


Sat October 29, 2011
(Denver Post) Followup Kid with cancer tweets Tebow that he's 'Tebowing while chemoing.' Subby hopes Stanford QB starts trend known as 'Lucking.'  (denverpost.com) (44)


Fri October 28, 2011
(BBC) Interesting Study finds aspirin can successfully block bowel cancer - especially if you use a really big one  (bbc.co.uk) (16)


Wed October 26, 2011
(Some Guy) Sick Candidate: "Assemblyman has missed a lot of votes." Assemblyman: "I had cancer." Candidate: "That's no excuse"  (mycentraljersey.com) (77)
(The Daily Record) Spiffy High School soccer player to cancer: Fark you  (dailyrecord.com) (7)


Tue October 25, 2011
(Science Daily) Scary Your drinking water might cause Alzheimer's, miscarriage, cancer, neurological dysfunction, and Alzheimer's. Everybody....uhh  (sciencedaily.com) (24)


Sun October 23, 2011
(News.com.au) Spiffy Venom from funnel-web spiders and tarantulas could be used to kill breast cancer cells. So... go get that venom. Go ahead. I'll wait right here. Go. I'm not getting anywhere near those damn things  (news.com.au) (21)


Thu October 20, 2011
(Google) Followup Cancer says it's Chavez-free  (google.com) (66)
(News.com.au) Obvious Mobile phones, which caused cancer, then didn't cause cancer, then caused cancer, then didn't cause cancer, then didn't cause cancer, then caused cancer, don't cause cancer  (news.com.au) (47)


Tue October 18, 2011
(Daily Mail) Sad Cancer-stricken mother dies 23 days after giving birth to daughter she saved by refusing chemotherapy  (dailymail.co.uk) (149)


Sun October 16, 2011
(Examiner) Dumbass Still no cure for cancer, but at least the American Cancer Society is refusing a half million dollar donation from atheists  (examiner.com) (335)

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