| Source | Fark Headline | Comments | |
| (Some Guy) | 100-year old pedophile sent back to prison. So much for a birthday greeting on the Today Show (skunkpost.com) | (126) | |
| British press insists that singing hag Susan Boyle is America's Woman Of The Year for 2009. Note to Britain: no, she's not (express.co.uk) | (51) |
| Winner: girl who entered "Today Show" contest. Loser: Al Roker's ear drums (youtube.com) | (16) |