Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		Greg Oden believes in Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, and the fact that he'll be healthy enough to help his team in the playoffs. "The knee is getting stronger."  (blog.oregonlive.com)	(24)

Santana has first session since surgery, rocks the house  (news.yahoo.com)

(22)

Yes Virginia, Santa is dead and Turkey would like his bones  (news.bbc.co.uk)

(40)

Swedish researchers conclude there is probably no Santa. Here comes the science  (sciencedaily.com)

(42)

		Going to school in a Santa suit? That's a suspending  (boston.com)	(63)
		Photoshop theme: The secret life of Santa  (fark.com)	(31)
		For those of you looking for a Christmas present, enjoy this December 1966 clip of Santa Claus meeting Batman and Robin as they scale a building. It just doesn't get any more Ho Ho Ho than that  (youtube.com)	(21)

		I-Mockery releases Santa Fu - a Christmas parody of the NES classic "Kung Fu"  (i-mockery.com)	(11)
		Ed Hardy shop in London has hired a Gary Colemanesque Santa to sit on YOUR lap. Bonus: bling and Ho Ho Hoes pic  (bloomberg.com)	(43)
(Some Jewish Santa)		"I wanna be Santa. My qualifications? I'm Jewish, a teacher, Fulbright scholar, Guggenheim fellow and author of 14 books. I have a beard. For 53 years I have wanted to participate as other than an envious Christmas outsider"  (metrosantacruz.com)	(96)
(Some Guy)		A rundown of the creepiest and most frightening mall Santas of the year. It's a slideshow, but so worth it  (thescottishsun.co.uk)	(84)
		In Britain, Santa Claus is treated just like all the other chavs  (express.co.uk)	(23)

		TSA agents discover the difficulty of conventional security measures on Santa's elves. "It was like a puzzle finding all the bells on each elf. My hands were covered in elf glitter after just the first pat-down"  (msnbc.msn.com)	(124)
		"Secret Santa" pays $1000 to local utility office to stop utilities shutoff for as many residents as possible because, you know, Christmas is all about consumerism & stuff  (azcentral.com)	(61)
		Philadelphia Eagles award Micheal Vick with Ed Block Award for sportsmanship and courage. Team then leaves to go throw insults and batteries at Santa Claus  (content.usatoday.com)	(77)
(Some Comic Geek)		New comics December 23rd. Santa has lots of good stuff for us comic geeks. What's he bringing you today?  (downtowncomics.com)	(66)
		Chavez to Colombia: You sent spy planes over Venezuala. Colombia to Chavez: Spy planes? What spy planes? It was Santa  (washingtonpost.com)	(50)
(WKRN)		Santa Claus robs bank, says he needed the money "to pay his elves"  (wkrn.com)	(21)
		Xmas Origins: Santa  (youtube.com)	(12)

		Woman attacks Santa after photo shoot and goes right onto the naughty list  (indystar.com)	(48)
		Santa Claus loves autotune  (youtube.com)	(39)

(Some Guy)		British Crimestoppers hotline staff "gobsmacked" by flood of bizarre calls linked to recent cold weather, from people complaining about drunken mall Santas to an obscene snowman "which featured an extra carrot"  (24dash.com)	(42)
(Some Guy)		Stock markets eagerly await the annual 'Santa Claus rally.' Here comes the economics  (wdsu.com)	(5)
		If your kids ever ask, you will now be able to tell them exactly how NORAD tracks Santa  (news.cnet.com)	(58)
		The Story of the Christmas Krampus: Farker's tribute to Santa's demonic enforcer, muppets  (youtube.com)	(22)

(Some Kalamazooian)

Catholic school forces children to write Christmas letters to Jesus, not Santa, ensuring they learn what Christmas is all about  (mlive.com)

(316)

Friday Photo Fun with the folks from TSG: Match the "Santa Con" with their crime for shot at best seller. Contest end at 6pm Eastern  (thesmokinggun.com)

(40)

(wigantoday)		Elf and safety concerns at Santa's Grotto sees children turned away in tears  (wigantoday.net)	(56)
		Santa's a bad role model, because he's a pipe-smoking fattie who makes minorities toil for no pay in a factory located in a harsh environment in order to pass out gifts based on his own subjective value judgements  (abcnews.go.com)	(105)

(Some Guy)

Theme: Unlikely Santa's helpers  (crossfit.com)

(42)

(WEAU 13 News)

"He smelled like alcohol. So I knew it wasn't the real Santa because Santa doesn't drink alcohol"  (weau.com)

(81)

(Oddee.com)		Some of the coolest Christmas ads from yesteryear that you'll see all day. Who knew Santa was such a nicotine addict and dirty old man?  (oddee.com)	(184)
		Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus, and the recession's farked him over, too  (sfgate.com)	(30)
		Priest dressed as Santa banned from delivering presents to children at an immigration asylum because some feared he was a security threat  (telegraph.co.uk)	(46)

Finally, a Christmas rap song about LEGO pirates attacking Santa Claus  (youtube.com)

(5)

"Children see that ad and they think we'd better leave beer for Santa instead of cookies and milk. I don't approve of it"  (torontosun.com)

(81)

Caption Santa's little broker  (online.wsj.com)

(34)

(Some Guy)

"Rule No. 2: Santa doesn't get arrested, because that just looks bad. So while this is a pub crawl that starts at 10AM (...), maintaining a level of decorum is essential."  (nbcnewyork.com)

(44)

For years, music producer Steve Albini has played Secret Santa to hundreds of poor families in Chicago. Until this year, when the government changed postal rules to make sure that he can't  (guardian.co.uk)

(51)

When Santa is naked on the front lawn, kids are gonna start asking questions  (wtsp.com)

(23)

Eight of the scariest Christmas movies of all time. Santa doesn't want milk and cookies--he wants your SOUL  (pastemagazine.com)

(77)

Your annual "Man Dressed as Santa Claus Commits XYZ Crime" story brought to you by Southeastern Pensylvania  (cbs3.com)

(17)

Cambridge university students scale college chapel to place Santa hats on all four spires, violating any number of elf and safety rules  (telegraph.co.uk)

(20)

If there was any doubt as to which list William C. Caldwell III of Georgia is on, it was eliminated when he dressed as an elf and told a mall Santa that he was carrying dynamite. With pic of what an elf probably doesn't look like  (news.yahoo.com)

(92)

(KTLA)

Today's 'Truck spills metric assload of random food item on roadway' brought to you by Santa Clarita and 40,000 pounds of pomegranates (w/pic)  (ktla.com)

(123)

Austrian government moves to ban Santa Claus, saying he is a foreign invader who threatens the racial purity of traditional Christmas celebrations. Don't ever change, Austria  (telegraph.co.uk)

(134)

Volunteers of America say they can't even afford to pay sidewalk Santas coal this year  (myfoxny.com)

(24)

		MSNBC now has a Department of the Obvious  (msnbc.msn.com)	(19)
		Santa Claus fired for making children cry at a Christmas tree lighting event. "He was inept, sullen and incommunicative"  (dailymail.co.uk)	(62)

(Some Guy)

This Thanksgiving be thankful a 300-pound, 6-foot bald homeless man with blue eyes didn't break into your home and steal your turkey  (mlive.com)

(39)

If at first you don't succeed at breaking into a supermarket, trap, trap yourself in the ventilation system five years later  (orlandosentinel.com)

(26)

Recession has caused many Americans to only buy things they can afford - and pay cash. Rather than praise this, the AP is calling these people "Scrooges"  (google.com)

(94)

(Some Guy)

Amazon patents presents, just in time for holiday injunctions against competitors, Santa  (techflash.com)

(18)

(Some Guy)

The US Postal Service agrees to allow Santa's enslaved work force to continue to receive his mail  (newsminer.com)

(36)