Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
172 headlines found matching 'SSA'
Thu May 26, 2016
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(CNN)
 
 
 
Yahoo spends $500,000 on security for CEO Marissa Mayer to protect her from possible stalkers, potential terrorists, stockholders opening the annual report
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: My wife has been seeing psychiatrists for years, and they prescribed her antidepressants. But she thought they weren't helping, so she stopped taking them and now she's moping about like Eeyore. How do I get her to retake her pills?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed May 25, 2016
(MassLive)
 
 
 
Woman charged with assault after soaking a sandwich in toilet water and throwing it at a police officer
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kickstarter)
 
 
 
His last words were "Huzzah". MST3K cast is kickstarting a tv show about life at the renaissance fair
source: kickstarter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Take it easy poor MSNBC reporter, anyone can mix up Bill Cosby with Bill Clinton during a sex assault report
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
"Groping Caregiver" sexually assaults 17-year-old mentally challenged girl, gives rise to new punk rock band name
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Melissa Gilbert ends her campaign for congress in Michigan because of health problems from injuries sustained 2012. "While I have received the best treatment and therapy I could have asked for, those injuries have only gotten worse"
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lynn Daily Item)
 
 
 
Is the Lynnway in Lynn, Massachusetts the ugliest street in America? Surely Farkers have pictures of uglier streets to share
source: itemlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTAR Phoenix)
 
 
 
If you plan on celebrating Memorial Day in the desert wilderness of Pinal County, Arizona, the sheriff there wants you to have fun, be safe, and watch out for Mexican cartel assassins
source: ktar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun May 22, 2016
(CNN)
 
 
 
Former Massachusetts governor Bill Weld stands by his remarks comparing Donald Trump's immigrant plan to deport Muslims to that of Hitler's own plans. And he hopes it will make him the Libertarian Party's essential VP candidate
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri May 20, 2016
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
Trump 2000: Ban assault rifles and extend waiting period for gun purchases. Trump 2016: Nobody loves concealed carried high-caliber automatic extended-mag on-demand freedom shooters more than me
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Dressage rider Hiroshi Hoketsu will not be the oldest Olympian ever because: C) his horse is ill
source: equusmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue May 17, 2016
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Walmart theft suspect tells cops she was "too lazy" to pay for Trojan personal massager, K-Y lubricant, vibrating penis ring
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reason Magazine)
 
 
 
I had no idea unlicensed massage therapists were a terrorist threat, boy do I feel more secure
source: reason.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun May 15, 2016
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
FIFA's dedication to rooting out corruption and ethical breaches is so successful that the Chairman of Audit and Compliance decided that he's not necessary anymore
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat May 14, 2016
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Police officer working mall security beats the hell out of teenage girl riding bike, charges her with assault. Oops, video. Charges dismissed, cop and mall sued
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wetpaint)
 
 
 
Actress Vanessa Hudgens fined $1000 for acting like a six-year-old in national forest
source: wetpaint.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri May 13, 2016
(Newser)
 
 
 
Famous JFK assassination conspiracy theorist dies at 89. Will be buried on a grassy knoll
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
'Free Hugs' Guy arrested on charges of assault, false advertising
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Much like your younger cousin Marissa, Google's AI writes some really weird, depressing 'poetry'
source: 9to5google.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu May 12, 2016
(Washington Times)
 
 
 
The $4.5 billion marijuana industry message to Congress: "We are now a $4.5 billion industry"
source: washingtontimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Nissabishi
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tech Insider (IO))
 
 
 
The trailer for the new Assassin's Creed movie has arrived. The movie will be 2 hours long and spend most of the time collecting random shiat, jumping into hay-bales and wrapping up the plot in the final 10 minutes
source: techinsider.io   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN (UK))
 
 
 
"Reche Caldwell, the leading receiver on the 2006 Patriots, might be the most inept criminal the NFL has ever produced. His criminal career was eerily similar to his football career: Short-lived, unfocused and full of colossal blunders" (good read)
source: espn.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GamesRadar)
 
 
 
EA announces their "Assassins Creed"-style game won't likely be ready until Donald Trump's second term
source: gamesradar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed May 11, 2016
(CNN)
 
 
 
Marissa Meyer spent $22 million on "goodwill" last year and officially got nothing for it. Really. It's in Yahoo's regulatory filings
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NECN Boston)
 
 
 
Good guy with a gun stops bad guy with a knife at a Massachusetts shopping mall
source: necn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue May 10, 2016
(STLToday)
 
 
 
Man commits arm assault against police officer by hitting him over the head with it
source: stltoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Des Moines Register)
 
 
 
"Faith-based" mental health "treatment center" convinces Iowa man he doesn't need all those anti-depressants and anti-psychotics he was prescribed, all he really needed was Jesus and vitamins. Suicide-attempt-larity ensues
source: desmoinesregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun May 08, 2016
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Massachusetts Congressman says cancelling billions-over-budget rail project would make Washington not trust state to manage future transportation projects. Good?
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Trump on GOP unity: "It's unnecessary"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat May 07, 2016
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Showing up drunk to prom is pretty much a right of passage, unless you're a teacher that's supposed to be chaperoning
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri May 06, 2016
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Apparently worried about the abiltiy of western intelligence agencies to intercept and decrypt their electronic message traffic, ISIS has apparently adopted the data transmission standard described in RFC1149 "IP over Avian Carriers"
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Union tells Massachusetts' biggest hospital chain to increase union membership or it will force a ballot initiative to control health care costs
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed May 04, 2016
(Vice)
 
 
 
In a move that will in no way upset anyone, the Obama administration has given Bashar al-Assad until August 1st to give up power, Or Else
source: news.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(International Business Times)
 
 
 
Hispanics will outspend Millennials by 2020, though there will be a lot of essays saying otherwise
source: ibtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue May 03, 2016
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
New animated message from the Jehovah's Witnesses' Watchtower Society tells kids struggling with same-sex attraction that God is basically like the TSA, or something like that
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon May 02, 2016
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Yahoo chief executive Marissa Mayer will receive $54.9m when she jumps ship; in other news, Yahoo still has $55m
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Darrell "Terminator" Issa will not stop. He is now looking at "violations" involving Clinton coordinating her activities and Bill's activities and Chelsea's activities in the Clinton Foundation...and the investigation could last until 2017
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun May 01, 2016
(Science Daily)
 
 
 
This article had an important message, but I was so busy clicking the submit button that I forgot what it was
source: sciencedaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 29, 2016
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Now that he's no longer running for president anymore, Marco Rubio decides to start doing his day job and lifts his senatorial hold that was blocking confirmation of Obama's ambassador to Mexico
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Russian jet fighter pays back the U.S. for Tom Cruise's "Top Gun" fiasco, does barrel roll over U.S. reconnaissance plane
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 28, 2016
(The News & Observer (NC))
 
 
 
North Carolina Senate sends HB2 repeal bill to a committee that meets as often as transgender people actually commit assault in bathrooms
source: newsobserver.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed April 27, 2016
(Slate)
 
 
 
Anonymous source downgrades NFL draft prospect because he a) is an alcoholic, b) has unproven allegations of sexual assault, c) can't cook
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cinema Blend)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Arrow, the team struggles to cope with the loss of Laurel. However, her father won't let her go as he seeks out Nyssa and the magic hot tub in an effort to cheat death twice in one season. (CW 8ET)
source: cinemablend.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talking Points Memo)
 
 
 
Breitbart editor Milo Yiannopoulos gives talk on the University of Massachusetts campus on over-boarding political correctness...dressed like the love child of George Michael and David Hasselhoff
source: talkingpointsmemo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 26, 2016
(Newburyport News)
 
 
 
The "I drank a lot because the Patriots lost" defense will not get you out of a DUI. Even in Massachusetts
source: newburyportnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Sadistic dentist who performed unecessary painful procedures sentenced to be fed to a singing carnivorous plant
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Having eliminated all competitors, the US government wants a securely-encrypted decentralized instant messaging app, and they're willing to pay for it
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 21, 2016
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
Prince's final message to the world was an enigmatic blank space
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Massachusetts court asked to decide if Ambien defense to DUI also applies to non-Kennedys
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 18, 2016
(KOCO Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Submitted for your approval: Man who claims to be from the future (where everyone is dead) is arrested after assaulting an employee and stealing chicken and bacon from a fast-food restaurant
source: koco.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
All countries have great national pastimes. For Egypt, it's making world leaders sit there and listen while their national anthems are completely massacred by the Egyptian national army band
source: foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Big Story)
 
 
 
UN ambassador's motorcade on way to meet Cameroon children succeeds
source: bigstory.ap.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat April 16, 2016
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Your text messages are about as secure as your WiFi
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tales of the Cocktail)
 
 
 
"Vodka doesn't necessarily make bad cocktails, but every bad cocktail has vodka in it"
source: talesofthecocktail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 15, 2016
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
With the sea seemingly in retreat, Best Korea attempts to launch assault on its other arch nemesis, the sky. As you might imagine, things did not go according to plan
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
You are on camera assaulting a woman and the only thing you're sorry for is the negative media attention it gave you?
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Florida prosecutor insists that he dropped assault charges against Trump's campaign manager based "purely on the facts," including facts like, whoa, Trump's got a lot of money and, holy shiat, his supporters are farking nutjobs
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBTV 3 Charlotte)
 
 
 
Christians "tip" waitress with Bible passage calling for her death. You know, just like Jesus would have
source: wbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 14, 2016
(24/7 Wall Street)
 
 
 
Turns out that when certain SEC analysts hop on their mom's computer they do more than just try to convince her it's okay to delete the seven thousand spam messages sitting in her AOL account
source: 247wallst.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
If your child wants to be a mule stringer, photo film processor, or blacksmith, don't necessarily talk her out of it. These industries are not nearly as obsolete as you think they are
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Massachusetts decides they want to be the Anti-North Carolina
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Sources say Donald Trump's campaign manager won't be prosecuted for assault. In related news, sources say Hillary Clinton will totally be indicted soon
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 12, 2016
(Discovery)
 
 
 
Group of distant black holes are mysteriously aligned to spell out message. Be sure to drink your Ovaltine
source: news.discovery.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 11, 2016
(CBC)
 
 
 
Jean-Luc Brassard quits as Canadian Olympic team's chef de mission, citing violations of Prime Directive
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wall Street Journal)
 
 
 
Chinese newspaper rips critics of Great Firewall, says it is necessary to protect China from corrosive Western propaganda while letting in cool stuff like movie trailers and multiplayer video games
source: blogs.wsj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
In a photo essay Politico asks the question "How close are Huma Abedin and Hillary Clinton?" before hastily adding: NTTAWWT
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun April 10, 2016
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Former linebacker Lou Sossamon scores his first touchdown during Gamecock alumni game. FARK: he's 94 years-old and adorable
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat April 09, 2016
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
The Benghazi panel has "lasted longer than the investigations into the federal response to Hurricane Katrina, the attack on Pearl Harbor, the assassination of President Kennedy, the Iran-Contra scandal, Church Committee, and the Watergate probe"
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri April 08, 2016
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Mossack Fonseca law firm has never forgiven Americans for Van Hagar
source: latino.foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Melissa McCarthy preparing for the inevitable failure of Ghostbusters by announcing she will be returning for Netflix's upcoming Gilmore Girls revival
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu April 07, 2016
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
New app identifies unnecessary words in your writing. Please don't contact Fark mods, your posts have not been deleted
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue April 05, 2016
(Mashable)
 
 
 
Abraham Lincoln carried a secret message concerning the Civil War in his pocket for most of his term. A message so secret even he didn't know about it. And no, it wasn't "DUCK"
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon April 04, 2016
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Walmart sells T-shirts with University of Maryland logo superimposed on map of Massachusetts. Then it gets weird
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Throwing bottles at cars, speeding with loaded handguns, loaded magazines, pepper spray, survival knives, nunchucks, brass knuckles, body armor, and handcuffs does not go over well in Massachusetts, where cars are the deadly weapon of choice
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 31, 2016
(Bon Appetit)
 
 
 
Massaman chicken
source: bonappetit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegram)
 
 
 
If you want to sell pot in Worcester, Massachusetts, you have to give the city a share of the revenue. Gross, not net
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Kos)
 
 
 
Corporate sponsors of the GOP Convention have suddenly realized it may not be good for business because the current Republican message doesn't mesh with those hip, cool, progressive and multicultural people seen using their products in TV and Web ads
source: dailykos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 30, 2016
(Music News)
 
 
 
Lady Gaga and Joe Biden team up for Sexual Assault, rally, unfortunate comma placement
source: music-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fortune)
 
 
 
Yahoo CEO Marissa Mayer could get $37 million if the company is sold. Mostly just as a bonus from investors for actually getting someone to take it off their hands
source: fortune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boing Boing)
 
 
 
CNBC's tutorial on secure password creation sends user passwords in the clear to 30 advertisers. A great way to really drive the "never share your password online" message home
source: boingboing.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Man arrested for protesting at a government hearing into Arizona's voting problems is also charged with assault because the officer patting him down for weapons pricked his finger on an open safety pin hanging from his shorts
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 29, 2016
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Seattle's 'Man in Tree' charged with malicious mischief and assault: "He's being held on $50,000 bail. If he makes bail he's ordered to have no contact with the tree"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Classic FM)
 
 
 
"A violin and cello duo turned a Handel Passacaglia into an astonishing interpretation of Metallica's classic 'Enter Sandman', complete with face-melting guitar solos"
source: classicfm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
EgyptAir plane hijacked by at least one armed assailant, diverted to Cyprus. EVERYBODY PANIC
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun March 27, 2016
(The Cambridge Chronicle)
 
 
 
Massachusetts library holds a "life size" battleship game. Apparently unclear on the life size of battleships
source: wickedlocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat March 26, 2016
(Reuters)
 
 
 
According to Romero Institute study, pop music often takes negative view of aging. Message to Kris Kristofferson, Leonard Cohen, Celine Dion, Harry Chapin and Jim Croce: Shame on you for perpetuating ageism
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri March 25, 2016
(MSN)
 
 
 
You might know about Peyton Manning being accused of sexual assault, but how about the time he almost fought reporter Jay Glazer during the Pro Bowl?
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Aldi will change the name of its 'rape yellow' paint after complaint from abuse victim. No word yet on the fate of its 'genocide purple' or 'felonious assault green' colors
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 24, 2016
(Variety)
 
 
 
25 years later, Melissa Joan Hart explains it all
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 23, 2016
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Citing failure of socialized medicine, Massachusetts lawmakers want to switch to socialized medicine
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
Institute for Depriving You Of The Slightest Joy In Life And Incessantly Nagging You Until You Beg For The Sweet Release Of Death And Even Then You're Doing It Wrong says moderate alcohol consumption isn't good for you after all
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
David Schwimmer says Robert Kardashian "never recovered" after the OJ Simpson Trial, to say nothing of the Setlik III massacre
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 22, 2016
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Larper posts on Ars message board about problem he's experiencing with patent trolling competitor. Newegg: Hey, we heard about your problem. Please allow us and our pitbull attorney to take care of this for you
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The CW Network)
 
 
 
Tonight on The Flash, Iris gets a challenging assignment, then on iZombie, Liv discovers something about Drake (CW starting at 8:00), and on Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Bobby and Hunter become involved in an assassination plot 9:00 on ABC)
source: cwtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon March 21, 2016
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
Remember how we didn't need to get involved in Syria? Well, that may have changed when Google emailed with Clinton about taking out Assad
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun March 20, 2016
(Telegram)
 
 
 
Massachusetts doesn't want anybody to know about its secret plan to (a) send Trump supporters to concentration camps, (b) move the Yankees to Worcester, or (c) convert highway exit numbers from sequential to mile-based
source: telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat March 19, 2016
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Man spends seven months and £5,000 transforming his Volkswagen Passat into the world's fastest garden shed
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri March 18, 2016
(CBC)
 
 
 
Woman "not getting the message" after 14 distracted driving tickets. Maybe they should text it to her
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 17, 2016
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Time for quarterly reviews at the Vatican. Let's see, Ambassador to the US, set up surprise meeting with a "Kim Davis, whoever that is"... yeah you're fired
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mashable)
 
 
 
"Riots aren't necessarily a bad thing," says Trump cheerleader and chief political commentator at USA Radio Networks
source: mashable.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 16, 2016
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Rape kit system unnecessary since most accusations false, says: a) convicted rapist, b) your creepy uncle, or c) Idaho sherrif
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 15, 2016
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Trump yesterday, on camera: I've actually had my people look into it [paying the legal fees of people who assault protesters at his rallies]. Trump today, on camera: I will never pay the legal fees of people assaulting protesters at my rallies
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon March 14, 2016
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Seattle Times says that Fark throws one right down the middle with this headline: "Goose Gossage to Jose Bautista: 'Quit flipping your bat on my lawn"
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Patient diagnosed with Lassa Fever, Lessa chance to live
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Five years ago: OkCupid analyses their dataset and writes insightful, interesting articles on the world of online dating. Today: "Women who send first message more likely to get a response than men lol"
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Buzzfeed)
 
 
 
Michelle Fields, Breitbart reporter assaulted by Donald Trump's campaign manager, tells propagandist overlords to STFU, DIAF
source: buzzfeed.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat March 12, 2016
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
90-year-old man charged with sexual assault at SHAG building
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri March 11, 2016
(Invicta FC)
 
 
 
Friday Night MMA: Invicta 16 featuring two title fights, Ayaka Hamasaki vs Amber Brown and Vanessa Porto vs Jennifer Maia. Streaming live at 8:30 PM ET on UFC Fight Pass
source: invictafc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Trump supporters are just "expressing their passion" by assaulting protestors
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Tittygram: Your message on boobs. BRILLIANT
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 10, 2016
(Purdue Exponent)
 
 
 
Supersonic ping-pong balls. For science. And Jimmy Fallon. Not necessarily in that order
source: purdueexponent.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Goose Gossage to Jose Bautista: "Quit flipping your bat on my lawn"
source: sports.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
One of those responsible gun owners that make TX the paradise of safety and civility it has become since "open carry " was passed, used "2nd Amendment braille" to leave a message at the office of a Dem. State Senator
source: trailblazersblog.dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Dallas News)
 
 
 
Texas Open Carry advocates will be at SXSW during Obama's visit, parading around with their assault weapons, and their leader promises that "Things will get interesting" which means in non gun-nut speak "Enjoy your Secret Service cavity search"
source: trailblazersblog.dallasnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Pawn Stars Chumlee arrested for meth, marijuana, and guns in sexual assault raid. Let's hope he knows an expert on these kind of things
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 09, 2016
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Ressa..., reciprocess... recent progress... if you have a medical pot card come to Vegas
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
Trump's personal voicemail hacked by Anonymous, changed to message recorded in voice of Shaggy. Trump responds by saying he would have got the presidency if it weren't for those meddling kids
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue March 08, 2016
(Lowell Sun)
 
 
 
Nissan Sentra wins fight with 18-wheeler
source: lowellsun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Massachusetts lawmakers return from fact-finding trip to Colorado anxious and paranoid about legal marijuana. Apparently they were doing it wrong
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KRON 4)
 
 
 
Soccer player arrested and charged for assaulting a referee. Surprisingly, not Hope Solo
source: kron4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
"Dear Prudence: My teenage son dated a classmate at summer camp; when they got home, she stopped talking to him. Turns out, he's sent her thousands of text messages and is accused of stalking her. Can I blame the girl for not telling him to stop?"
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon March 07, 2016
(CNN)
 
 
 
New breakup service sends e-mails, texts, phone messages significant others to end a relationship. Which is just slightly more inconsiderate than if the person was to break up by sending their own e-mail, text, phone message
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
Americans make 11 million visits to the doctor every year because of obesity. Which would be unnecessary if it weren't for the 500 million trips every year to McDonald's
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri March 04, 2016
(Patheos)
 
 
 
Bristol Palin sees a study on how easy it is for young children to find hidden guns and concludes the message is that guns shouldn't be hidden from kids
source: patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
San Bernardino DA claims the locked iPhone may contain a "cyber pathogen," as well as probably being responsible for JFK assassination, the 9/11 controlled detonation, maybe also a morphed T-1000 specimen
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atavist)
 
 
 
Photoessay: Subby took the longest train in India: 4,273 km (includes time-lapse video)
source: edhanley.atavist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu March 03, 2016
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Georgia's GOP governor uses passages from the New Testament to reject a sweeping, bigoted anti-LGBT "religious freedom" bill. WE HAVE GONE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS, PEOPLE
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed March 02, 2016
(WBUR Boston)
 
 
 
Hillary ekes out a win in Massachusetts, and Bill may have violated state election laws doing so
source: wbur.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Melissa Harris-Perry: "Gag order? I don't want no stinkin' gag order"
source: money.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
If you think Drumpf had a good day yesterday, Fox News just published an article on how to prevent him getting elected. And the NYT called him a liar on its front page in an editorial board essay
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LawFuel)
 
 
 
Today is [Facebook friend's] birthday. Reply to post a wish on her Timeline or reply with 1 to post 'Happy Birthday' or file a class action lawsuit for sending users unsolicited automated text messages
source: lawfuel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 29, 2016
(E! Online)
 
 
 
Sam Smith is not the first openly gay Oscar winner. There was Melissa Ethridge in 2007. And Elton John in 1994. And Stephen Sondheim in 1991. And John Gielgud in 1991. And Alan Ball in 2000. And...eh, I'm done here
source: eonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 New York)
 
 
 
Sometimes you want to send a message only a severed horse's head will convey. And sometimes you have trouble getting it into the apartment so you leave it in the park
source: fox5ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 26, 2016
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Hitchhiking in Zimbabwe carries the added risk of being assaulted for your sperm
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 24, 2016
(Fusion)
 
 
 
Boston hero David Ortiz, the greatest ambassador the game of baseball has ever seen, on domestic abusers: "These are good guys, I feel so bad for them"
source: fusion.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
It's possible for your passenger to hack your Nissan Leaf and take over the air conditioner. Or they could just reach over and turn the knob
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Boy suffering from Stiff Skin Syndrome, and not the good kind
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Fark-ready headline: "Meerkat expert is cleared of assaulting monkey handler with wine glass in London Zoo Christmas party catfight over man who looked after the llamas"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 22, 2016
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Dave Grohl had to convince Grammy producers that a Lemmy tribute was necessary
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Immanuel Kant's findings are flawed, but that's to be expected from a real pissant who was very rarely stable
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Funker530)
 
 
 
US Marines caught on video mercilessly massacring auditorium full of schoolchildren
source: funker530.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Massachusetts to create Nope Island
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 19, 2016
(The Wrap)
 
 
 
Ted Cruz gives us his thoughts on who would be an appropriate UN ambassador if he became President
source: thewrap.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 18, 2016
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Teacher charged with assault after knocking gun out of student's hand. Correction: Teacher charged with assault after knocking candy out of student's hand
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
Glenn Beck: Assassin working on behalf of Ted Cruz took out Scalia
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 17, 2016
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Texas mayor arrested again, adding resisting arrest, assault, and disorderly conduct to the previous corruption charges. Bonus: New charges arise because of calls for his resignation
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 16, 2016
(Canoe)
 
 
 
Kijiji ad: Cleaning lady needed for light sweeping, dusting, sexual assault
source: cnews.canoe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Woman assaults club bouncer using football and wrestling moves, now is being looked at by the WWE for their next diva
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat February 13, 2016
(Xinhua)
 
 
 
Chinese cinema sends message to moviegoers suggesting they not see a movie because it's a "scam". Surprisingly, not sent for Adam Sandler movie
source: news.xinhuanet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica (UK))
 
 
 
"Seismometers cost money to install and operate - but everyone with a smartphone has a passable one in their pocket. Harness enough of them and you've got yourself a crowdsourced earthquake-detection network that could work absolutely anywhere"
source: arstechnica.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 12, 2016
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Republican state senator says it was a handshake, Democratic county clerk says it was an assault. Which pretty much sums up the politics in this country
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 11, 2016
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Today's "teacher gets fired after sending nude Snapchat photos and sexually explicit messages to her students" story comes to you from Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 10, 2016
(Comic Book Resources)
 
 
 
Tonight, on Arrow, Nyssa presents Ollie with an offer he can't refuse in order to save his sister (CW 8ET)
source: comicbookresources.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 09, 2016
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
RubioBot receives unexpected query, defaults to standard messaging protocol again
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
RubioBot's speechifying subroutines continue to malfunction, indicating a complete system wipe may be necessary
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun February 07, 2016
(PBS)
 
 
 
Why bother with ponies and cats when you have the Battle Royale at the Hospital? Will the Dowager Countess use her patented Oscar Wilde hold, or will Isobel make Violet scream, "Assassin" in the echoing hallways? "Downton Abbey", 9 PM Eastern, PBS
source: pbs.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
George Orwell's books may be long forgotten, but his essay describing the perfect British pub has had a lasting effect
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri February 05, 2016
(Politico)
 
 
 
Everyone who believes the government released all of the documents on the Kennedy assassination step forward ... not so fast
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Gun Blog)
 
 
 
US FEDERAL APPEALS COURT OVERTURNS MARYLANDS ASSAULT WEAPONS BAN (well not really, they sent it back to the lower court to reconsider, but apparently you can't get a greenlight for strictly correct headlines). Boobies
source: pagunblog.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu February 04, 2016
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Seattle hair salon employees clipped via text message
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
"Millennial women are the most staunchly feminist group of voters in America. They want to see a woman in the White House. Just not necessarily this woman"
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed February 03, 2016
(CNBC)
 
 
 
After some FaceTime with a federal court, jury sends Apple an iMessage ordering them to pay $625M for patent infringement
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Bill Cosby could dodge sexual assault charges using this one weird trick
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Rest of world's mass transit public-service messages: "We apologize for the unanticipated delay." New York mass transit public-service message: "Some guy got killed...I hope the motherf-ker suffered"
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue February 02, 2016
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
Law & Order: Sexual Assault and Chicago Med get renewed as Dick Wolf signs a new deal with NBC that will make him more powerful than ever before
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon February 01, 2016
(Florida Alligator)
 
 
 
Man at Walmart arrested for assault with a delicious weapon
source: alligator.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
PO-TAY-TOES: Boil'em, mash'em, send'em as a gift with a personalised message
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri January 29, 2016
(Fusion)
 
 
 
Scientists say wisdom teeth removal rarely necessary. An wu hell me hat NOW??
source: fusion.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu January 28, 2016
(Boulder Daily Camera)
 
 
 
Topless gardener convicted of swindling blind senior citizen out of his trailer home after failed presidential assassination attempt. Florida tag stares wide-eyed
source: dailycamera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Campus Reform)
 
 
 
Mizzou "muscle" professor suspended after assault charge, carrot top impression
source: campusreform.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 

Displayed 172 of about 882 links -- join TotalFark to see them all

Submit a Link »
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report