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164 headlines found matching 'SSA'
Mon May 04, 2015
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Vice)
 
 
 
This man has a rare form of synaesthesia. A disorder that causes him to taste words. His unique story to the left, you spewing up the most vile glossary to the right. Mmm purple
source: motherboard.vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Waitress serving Kansas governor Sam Brownback wrote him a message on his receipt. Was it: A) her phone number, B) instructions for making meth, or C) "Tip the schools"?
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 


Sun May 03, 2015
(WWLP)
 
 
 
Massachusetts bill would recognize pharmacists as health care providers, sandwich artists as chefs, and chess players as athletes
source: wwlp.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(67)
 


Sat May 02, 2015
(Newser)
 
 
 
The prize for this essay contest isn't baaaad
source: newser.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(8)
 


Fri May 01, 2015
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Model Cassandra Bankson has only one kidney, but boy does she overcompensate for it
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(72)
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Drunk man assaults passersby with...white mice. "The motives behind the 37-year-old man's attacks are unclear." Subby goes out on a limb here and suggests that alcohol might have been a factor
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 


Thu April 30, 2015
(Fox News)
 
 
 
THE Ohio State University band instructor for THE Ohio State University band charged with THE kidnapping, THE sexual assault, and THE rape
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Secret messaging service to shut down. I'd tell you which one but it's, well you know, Secret
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(8)
 
(ABC)
 
 
 
High school student charged with aggravated assault for lacing his teacher's coffee with a) LSD, b) laxatives, or c) saline solution
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 


Wed April 29, 2015
(IGN)
 
 
 
Tonight on Arrow, With Ollie as heir to Ra's Al Ghul, the League of Assassins moves against Nyssa in Starling City. (CW 8ET)
source: ign.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(105)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Walmart's advice to thousands of workers it suddenly laid off without notice: "Avoid stimulants such as caffeine, chocolate and nicotine and depressants such as alcohol"
source: gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 


Tue April 28, 2015
(Deslidefied)
 
 
 
Do you know what the 10 largest living things on the planet are? List includes colossal squid
source: deslide.clusterfake.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
KY judge (*snicker*) finds a T-shirt company refused to fill an order for gay pride t-shirts not because the customers were gay {which is illegal} but "because of the MESSAGE advocating sex outside of a marriage between one man and one woman"
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(182)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Man finds his wife Facebook messaging an old friend, so he made his way to the man's house, punched him, and shot him in the leg. Clearly, she had reason to want to find someone else
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 


Mon April 27, 2015
(Vile Reviews)
 
 
 
Patton Oswalt stars in a new movie called Dude Bro Party Massacre III, and the trailer is actually pretty awesome
source: vilereviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(56)
 


Sun April 26, 2015
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
British anti-terror police are using assault rifles 'that do not shoot straight in hot weather'
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 


Sat April 25, 2015
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Drone paraglider and gyrocopter could revolutionize delivery of troop supplies, campaign finance reform messages to U.S. Capitol
source: foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Times of Israel)
 
 
 
Looks like someone just had their new toys from Iran blown up--Israeli jets strike Assad, Hezbollah targets in Syria
source: timesofisrael.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(151)
 
(Hardball Talk)
 
 
 
Orioles place three infielders on the disabled list, leave urgent phone messages for Brooks Robinson, Cal Ripken
source: hardballtalk.nbcsports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(5)
 
(NHL)
 
 
 
Full day of hockey ahead. Three Elimination games. Isles, Preds, Canucks will try to extend their series. Bolts/Wings play game 5. The festivities start in what could be the last game at Nassau Coliseum at 3pm ET
source: nhl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(1223)
 


Fri April 24, 2015
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Three more women added to the cast of Bill Cosby Sexual Assault Allegations
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(66)
 


Thu April 23, 2015
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Burglars dump TV in bath and flood kitchen in what police call their worst-ever example of 'dissatisfaction over other people's cheap, unfenceable crap' (pics)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Former head of the Royal Canadian Armored Moose Assault Battalion: It's aboot time world governments stopped covering up UFO truth
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(37)
 


Wed April 22, 2015
(Information Age)
 
 
 
Those angry messages and posts you wrote on Facebook, but decided not to post? Facebook remembers
source: information-age.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(19)
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
8 million calls to the IRS went unanswered this tax season because customer service money was diverted to Obamacare and new reports required of foreign banks. If you'd just listened to Republicans, this would have been unnecessary
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
In anticipation of next year's move to Brooklyn, Islanders fans steal seats from Nassau Coliseum while playoffs continue. What the puck?
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 


Mon April 20, 2015
(Disclose.tv)
 
 
 
Dying CIA agent: "Marilyn Monroe was a commie spy and I assassinated her for America"
source: disclose.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 


Sun April 19, 2015
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Gyrocopter dude can't figure out why his message of campaign finance reform isn't getting through to Congress
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(101)
 
(CBS 19 Tyler)
 
 
 
Army morale at six-year low as soldiers are dissatisfied with their jobs and distrust leadership. Which at least means they'll have no trouble eventually adjusting back into mainstream society
source: cbs19.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
Newly-discovered passage from "A Wrinkle in Time" puts a wrinkle in long-standing assumptions about Madeline L'Engle's political beliefs
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 


Sat April 18, 2015
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
Saying 'I have kids with me' allows you to park your Range Rover in a disabled parking spot and then swear at and assault the handicapped person filming you
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 


Fri April 17, 2015
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Senior citizens home uses morning video messages to aid patients with Alzheimer's and dementia. "It's an idea borrowed from an unlikely place, the 2004 Adam Sandler movie '50 First Dates.'" So Adam Sandler movies serve a purpose. Who knew?
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Mediaite)
 
 
 
MSNBC host Melissa Harris Perry, who loves to bash corporations for not paying taxes, owes the IRS $70,000
source: mediaite.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(62)
 


Thu April 16, 2015
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
Jail to inmates: Buy underwear in commissary or go commando
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 


Wed April 15, 2015
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Olivia Munn with the mind of a geek and the body of a model will play Psyloke who has the mind of a British woman in the body of an Asian assassin, Comics amiright?
source: herocomplex.latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(143)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Former governor of Massachusetts cashes in, takes high-dollar job at Bain Capital. Degree of difficulty: not Mitt Romney
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Little girl sends unique hand-written message to her dad. Difficulty: He's on the ISS
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(29)
 


Tue April 14, 2015
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
'Our American Cousin' stages comeback 150 years after Lincoln's assassination. Critics suggest you reserve a booth and give it a shot
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(43)
 
(WNEP Scranton)
 
 
 
After woman asks teenagers to quiet down in movie theater, they assault her in parking lot. Two of the alleged attackers were caught on security cam, so if you see either of these young girls.... Hold on, those are teenagers? Seriously?
source: wnep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(203)
 
(Some Scanner)
 
 
 
You may want to sit down for this, but medical labs offer bonuses to doctors for running unnecessary tests. On second thought, you may want to lie down for this and hold very still
source: diabetesinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(42)
 


Mon April 13, 2015
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Blackwater contractors sentenced to 30 years in prison for Iraqi massacre
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(128)
 


Sun April 12, 2015
(Popular Mechanics)
 
 
 
ProTip: If ever you should be stranded out on the ocean and are forced to send a message in a bottle seeking help, do it the smart way. Here comes the science
source: popularmechanics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 


Sat April 11, 2015
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Former NYPD commissioner and ex-con Bernie Kerik: "Prison is a colossal waste of time and life. I didn't understand this when I was warden and commissioner, I'm embarrassed to say. No one with my background has ever been inside"
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(61)
 


Fri April 10, 2015
(Colorado Springs Gazette)
 
 
 
If you've been wondering whether the Air Force Academy could get through a month without someone being sexually assaulted, the answer is no
source: gazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Argentina wants to throw Justin Bieber in jail for assault. Subby will raise a glass of malbec to that
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(27)
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
France: Hi Vatican, can you approve our new ambassador? BTW he's gay. Vatican: .... *tumbleweed*
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(81)
 
(Dread Central)
 
 
 
Just when you thought that Hollywood was out of ideas, get ready for Sharkansas Women's Prison Massacre. Not only does it star Traci Lords, Dominque Swain and mutant prehistoric sharks, but the trailer is the apex of craptacular
source: dreadcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(65)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Jon Stewart to Kansas: "We should put the same petty, unnecessary and insulting restrictions on your spending. Maybe they'll motivate you to escape your culture of federal dependency"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(235)
 


Thu April 09, 2015
(ABC)
 
 
 
Nanny state goes full wet-nurse on Alyssa Milano
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(305)
 
(The Australian)
 
 
 
Godzilla is Japan's newest employee, as the giant lizard has been appointed Tokyo resident and tourism ambassador
source: theaustralian.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 
(TMZ)
 
 
 
Bill Cosby accuser says he may have admitted to assaulting her... at some point... in some documents... somewhere... maybe
source: tmz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 


Wed April 08, 2015
(Breitbart.com)
 
 
 
American politician accused of supporting Middle Eastern theocracy as a necessary prerequisite to bringing about the End Times
source: breitbart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Today's badass is this guy, who went on a rampage in a Pita Pit by destroying the store and assaulting random pedestrians
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(50)
 


Tue April 07, 2015
(RotoExperts)
 
 
 
A Masters glossary, so you can pretend to know what you're talking about
source: rotoexperts.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(23)
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Indiana state senator Phil Boots with today's GOP minority outreach message: "I want to know where my protected class is for me as a white, Anglo-Saxon Protestant"
source: thepaper24-7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(301)
 


Mon April 06, 2015
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
U.S job growth falls to 15-month low as snow removal hiring in Massachusetts has completely dried up
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(Digital Journal)
 
 
 
70% of people taking antidepressants aren't suffering depression. Although in this economy it will just be a matter of time until they are
source: digitaljournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
It's back to domestic football this weekend. Will $terling show his class in the first game against Arsenal? Can the Shernaissance at Villa get some points against Man Utd? Will the Chelsea vs Stoke game be a cure for insomnia?
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(256)
 


Sat April 04, 2015
(Cracked)
 
 
 
Here are 5 messed up subliminal messages that you may not have noticed in the G.I. Joe cartoons, where they might have made you an evil person
source: cracked.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(46)
 


Thu April 02, 2015
(Action A Go-Go)
 
 
 
Move over James Bond. Melissa McCarthy is here to become our next super spy hero and prove that body image ain't nothing but a social construct that has no bearing on actual super spy ability
source: actionagogo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(KATU)
 
 
 
The University of Oregon creates position of "Assistant Vice President for Sexual Assault." Evidently the Dean of Vice and Amoral Behavior" was overloaded
source: katu.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 


Tue March 31, 2015
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
There's nothing more adorable than a wanted felon arguing he has an inalienable right to grow marijuana and protect his crop with a sawed-off assault rifle
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(194)
 
(Florida Today)
 
 
 
Judge gets pissed off when attorney refuses to waive speedy trial for his client. "If you want to fight, let's go out back and I'll just whoop your ass" Attorney: Challenge accepted. Judge: Punch. Attorney: How ya like assault charges?
source: floridatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(115)
 


Mon March 30, 2015
(WPXI.com)
 
 
 
Teacher arrested for obsessively stalking 11-year-old girl via text message, homework sheets. "Alcorn hid her phone number on a math worksheet by telling the girl to dial numbers that had been circled"
source: wpxi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Syrian leader Assad claims that ISIS has gained quite a following since they provoked America into fighting them. It's almost like there's a history of "provoking America = more recruits and added legitimacy"
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 


Sun March 29, 2015
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Over a million lawsuits over credit card debt are filed in Massachusetts each year. If even half of the defendants showed up in court, the system would collapse. That's about to happen
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(64)
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Antidepressants were found at home of Germanwings co-pilot, which, in light of recent events, didn't really live up to their name very well
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(198)
 


Fri March 27, 2015
(NBC Bay Area)
 
 
 
Berkeley has an ambassador program to assist people with directions, keep the streets clean and such. Let's meet Ambassador Suckerpunch
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(20)
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Woman charged with assault after squirting breast milk on police officer
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 


Wed March 25, 2015
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
Pro-tip: When running from law enforcement, do not send out social media messages pinpointing your location. It makes the job for law enforcement a little easier to find you
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Renters in Massachusetts abandon house after plugging up drains with cement and wiring the entire house to explode. They're definitely not going to get their cleaning and security deposits back; not that anyone ever does
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(95)
 


Tue March 24, 2015
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Amazon, recently ordered to start collecting sales taxes from Massachusetts residents, gets millions of dollars of tax credits from Massachusetts for its own taxes. Taxes
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Police determine victim made up rape claim after DNA of 'black' attacker matches white man in their database. First clue should have been when sketch artist drew his thumb. With pic of 'assailant'
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(250)
 
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Number of uninsured drops by 11 million since passage of Obamacare. Republicans vow to find a way to make sure those 11 million are once again uninsured after 2016
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(227)
 


Mon March 23, 2015
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
NY Times: any food that gives you even the slightest joy in life will kill you. All necessary nutrition can be had in the form of a slightly runny paste made from kale juice and ground-up Tom Friedman columns
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(211)
 


Sun March 22, 2015
(Action A Go-Go)
 
 
 
This week's edition of unnecessary reboots features The Transporter, because we all know how Jason Statham has totally fallen off the map so yeah let's just go ahead and remake this one without him
source: actionagogo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(15)
 


Fri March 20, 2015
(WCTV Tallahassee)
 
 
 
Lakeland cop caught sending dirty messages to 24-month-old
source: wctv.tv   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 


Thu March 19, 2015
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
If you're going to try to assault your wife's friend, perhaps you should just call for an ambulance yourself when she tries to bite your penis off if you really want one
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 


Sun March 15, 2015
(Magic Valley)
 
 
 
Bill Watterson talks about his thought process behind Calvin & Hobbes. "Really, I was writing to amuse Melissa (my wife) and myself. That's as far as I understand"
source: magicvalley.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 


Sat March 14, 2015
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Thirty years ago, on March 15, 1985, a small computer company in Massachusetts registered the very first ".com" domain. Fourteen years later, there was Zombo
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(16)
 


Fri March 13, 2015
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
No matter how rude the guy is, if you're the owner of a carpet store, you should never leave a message on a customer's phone threatening to kill him and his mother
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 


Wed March 11, 2015
(My Northwest)
 
 
 
Meet the woman who gives frogs enemas and turtles massages
source: mynorthwest.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 


Tue March 10, 2015
(CBS News)
 
 
 
South Korea ambassador released from hospital. Plans to take a stab at uniting the two Koreas
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 
(Portland Press Herald)
 
 
 
Want to own a Maine country inn? You're just a 200-word essay away
source: pressherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(DFW Star-Telegram)
 
 
 
Most ER visits don't start with a male nurse helping you take off your bra and end with him giving you a relaxing shoulder massage
source: star-telegram.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Man goes prospecting, finds massive gold nugget, doesn't know what to assay
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 


Mon March 09, 2015
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
Boston 2024 Olympic group releases staff salaries. Among them is former Gov. Deval Patrick, who is making $7500/day as "global ambassador"
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"Give us what we want or we let ISIS fighters have free passage"
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(168)
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"One of the things we understand now is that the initial ship that came over from England to Massachusetts Bay actually carried more beer than water," says Bruce Bustard
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(60)
 
(Medpage Today)
 
 
 
Good news: Your autistic child's asthma is not due your use of SSRI antidepressants during pregnancy
source: medpagetoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 


Sat March 07, 2015
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Nissan recalls 640,000 vehicles because hoods should only fly open in demolition derbies
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(8)
 


Fri March 06, 2015
(Billboard)
 
 
 
Nick Hornby has written a new essay detailing where the characters in High Fidelity would be, twenty years after the conclusion of the novel
source: billboard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(25)
 
(KHOU Houston)
 
 
 
Now two women have come forward to say Massage Envy employees rubbed them the wrong way
source: khou.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 


Thu March 05, 2015
(ABC)
 
 
 
North Korea offers condolences over attack on U.S. Ambassador to Other Korea. Haha, just kidding, official state media calls it a "knife-attack shower of justice"
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
Hi, this is Microsoft tech support. Your computer has been infected with a virus, and if you don't let me in to fix it, I'm going to send assassins from Canada to fix you
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 


Tue March 03, 2015
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Massachusetts Supreme Court says there is no constitutional right to have a Taser because stun guns weren't invented in 1789
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(314)
 


Sat February 28, 2015
(Huffington Post UK)
 
 
 
"The UKIP leadership had a simple message for its party members and parliamentary candidates gathered in Margate this weekend: Please don't say anything stupid between now and election day"
source: huffingtonpost.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(96)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Cop lied about a marijuana arrest, failed to report how he tormented a suspect with his Taser, got a massage illegally that was just a happy ending, and, worst of all, claimed a three-hour lunch break lasted only one hour
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 


Fri February 27, 2015
(Jezebel)
 
 
 
Not enough that Scott Walker thinks little Jane's high school math teacher is from ISIS, now when she goes to college and gets sexually assaulted, the college won't be required to report it
source: jezebel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(468)
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Guy boards train, walks over to mentally disabled woman, shakes her hand, then proceeds to punch her square in the face before sexually assaulting her. Rakes and scythes to the left, pitchforks and torches to the right. w/scary CCTV footage
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(49)
 
(io9)
 
 
 
Dissatisfied customer goes all Babylonian on copper vendor - circa 1750 BC
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(8)
 


Thu February 26, 2015
(Belfast Telegraph)
 
 
 
Belfast man convicted of assaulting neighbor with his ... enormous beer gut?
source: belfasttelegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 


Wed February 25, 2015
(io9)
 
 
 
Modern science solves historical murder mysteries over a century later. Still no solved case for JFK assassination
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(45)
 
(Opposing Views)
 
 
 
28-year-old man assaults his 92-year-old girlfriend. No, not in Florida
source: opposingviews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Stop The Slowdown)
 
 
 
While it looks like the FCC will be enforcing Net Neutrality, the vote isn't until tomorrow. There's still time to make your voice heard, and to ensure it, your message will go to the Jumbotron in front of the FCC. Here's the link
source: stoptheslowdown.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(893)
 


Tue February 24, 2015
(Vocativ)
 
 
 
Just like Megazord, this guy connected six assault rifles to build one (surprisingly legal/terrifying) Gatling gun
source: vocativ.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(11)
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Massachusetts man sold out of his 6-lb. packages which went for $89 apiece, so now he's going to sell 10-lb. packages for $119 each. Fark: he's selling mail-order snow
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 


Mon February 23, 2015
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Netanyahu's claim in 2012 that Iran was a year away from having a nuclear bomb was completely discredited by those hippies at Mossad
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 


Thu February 19, 2015
(BBC)
 
 
 
Kim Jong-Il ice festival features sculptures of assault rifles and a missile launcher as well as a "Kimjongilia," which we'll assume is a condition whose symptoms include making ice sculptures of assault rifles and a missile launcher
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(44)
 
(Sun Sentinel)
 
 
 
Cyberstalker busted after 6th graders start receiving creepy-as-hell messages from anonymous sender who turns out to be ex camp counselor-in-training. This wouldn't have happened under Tripper's watch
source: sun-sentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(80)
 
(KPHO Phoenix)
 
 
 
68-year-old man accused of assaulting a massage therapist at a casino hotel room. There was no happy ending
source: kpho.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(10)
 
(Gawker)
 
 
 
Already in trouble for tax evasion, writing employees rubber paychecks and assault, Jersey Shore's "The Situation" gets his tanning salon evicted for failure to pay rent
source: defamer.gawker.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 


Wed February 18, 2015
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Imam charged with sexual assault, shocking his congregation, who said they would expect this sort of behavior from Christians
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 


Tue February 17, 2015
(San Diego Chargers)
 
 
 
Chargers post blunt message to San Diego stadium committee - they're pretty much going to move to Los Angeles
source: chargers.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(74)
 
(The Wrap)
 
 
 
"Besides being the worst film I have ever seen, three women were getting arrested and put in a police van when we arrived" says witness Michael Bolton after three women assaulted a man at a 50 Shades of Grey screening
source: thewrap.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(69)
 


Mon February 16, 2015
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Ear protection will not be necessary this Wednesday for ESPN viewers, as Dick Vitale will not call UNC-Duke game for first time in network's 36-year history
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 
(AKI Press)
 
 
 
Here's how they clear the highways of snow in Kazakhstan. Trust us when we say, "man and woman's talk in the background expresses dissatisfaction" is international code for "What the F*CK was THAT?"
source: akipress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(32)
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
Australian foreign minister answers series of interview questions via text message using only emoji
source: uk.businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(5)
 


Sat February 14, 2015
(Examiner)
 
 
 
Nissan announces glow-in-the-dark car to be built at their Fukushima assembly plant
source: examiner.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(17)
 


Thu February 12, 2015
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Johnny Cash's message to his wife June beats Keats, Churchill, Beethoven as the greatest love letter of all time
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 


Tue February 10, 2015
(SeattlePI)
 
 
 
Senate approves Botticelli as drug czar, believe his linear style exemplifies the grace of the Renaissance
source: seattlepi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(7)
 


Thu February 05, 2015
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Are you a hipster expecting a baby? Take off your scarf and fedora, brew some civet poop coffee, and check out this list from the 1800s for that perfect baby name
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(51)
 


Mon February 02, 2015
(USA Today)
 
 
 
While "Cats in the Cradle" is a touching song, and fits the father-son bonding theme of Nissan's Superb Owl commercial, you'd think SOMEBODY at Nissan's ad agency would remember Harry Chapin died in a horrific car accident
source: entertainthis.usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(195)
 
(Destructoid)
 
 
 
Not saying that The Witcher 3 game is any good, necessarily, but apparently they recorded 16 hours of motion capture for sex scenes
source: destructoid.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 


Sat January 31, 2015
(Tampa Bay Online)
 
 
 
Guy gets run over by an SUV, assaults assisting deputy, and tries to steal cruiser even after getting tased twice. And how was your night?
source: tbo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(13)
 
(Yahoo Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this amphibious assault
source: l.yimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(18)
 


Fri January 30, 2015
(Inquisitr)
 
 
 
Melissa Rauch goes from 'Theory' to practice
source: inquisitr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(84)
 


Thu January 29, 2015
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Senior White House official announces they're gonna have a new Israeli ambassador very very soon
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(132)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Speaker of Massachusetts House, who accepted term limit after predecessors faced criminal charges, declares himself Speaker-for-life after being only an unindicted coconspirator
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(12)
 


Wed January 28, 2015
(CNN)
 
 
 
ISIS takes credit for attacking Libya's Corinthia Hotel, the JFK assassination, the Northeast Blizzard of 2015, and canceling Better Off Ted
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(54)
 
(Short List)
 
 
 
Seven actors who might be getting a well-needed McConaissance this year
source: shortlist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(40)
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Mr. Incredible convicted of assaulting Batgirl. Is there no honor among superheroes?
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 


Tue January 27, 2015
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-TX) says "Republican females" sent "entirely the wrong message" when they derailed an abortion ban because it did not have an exception for rape. Like you know, women are adults with rights or something
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(212)
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Another day, another assault rifle in the road. Rare "AR15s falling off vehicle" trifecta in play
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(131)
 


Mon January 26, 2015
(Gizmag)
 
 
 
How computer composers are changing how music is made. This is not an EDM link. Necessarily
source: gizmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(38)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Iran vows revenge against Israel for killing a top general in an Israeli airstrike in Syria on Hezbollah fighters who are fighting for Assad to help him to destroy ISIS. In response, US feels a headache coming on and goes to lie down
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(73)
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
In most places, people toss their trash along the interstate. In Phoenix they toss loaded assault rifles
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(203)
 


Fri January 23, 2015
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Locals of a beautiful Argentinian town that is trying to get tourism decided to assault and beat 10 Israeli tourists while yelling "F-ing Jew" at them. Yup that should help boost tourism
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(117)
 


Wed January 21, 2015
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg set an example for how best to listen to the State of the Union message -- she took a nap
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(89)
 


Tue January 20, 2015
(CNN)
 
 
 
Ignored in the "war against terrorism" is Barack Obama's global assassination campaign targeting people suspected of perhaps intending to harm us some day, and any unfortunates who happen to be nearby
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(83)
 


Mon January 19, 2015
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
New study discovers that living near trees means you'll need fewer antidepressants because you'll be too busy raking leaves to be bummed out with life
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(52)
 
(Haaretz)
 
 
 
Charlie Hebdo printing 7 million copies of Boobies-massacre issue
source: haaretz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(116)
 


Sun January 18, 2015
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Madman/would-be-assassin who clearly lacks ambition fires several shots at the VICE president's house
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(109)
 


Fri January 16, 2015
(NBC San Diego)
 
 
 
"The defense attorney for a man accused of a bizarre sexual assault in a Big Lots bathroom said the attack - and the pink Barbie costume he wore during the assault - were brought on by the use of drugs"
source: nbcsandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
Elizabeth Warren: No no no, not the comfy Darrell Issa treatment over my Consumer Financial Protection Bureau *flutters eyelashes*
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(63)
 


Thu January 15, 2015
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
It's a dream come true for lawyers, grammar nazis, helicopter parents, and sweaty 13-year-olds: A middle-school teacher gives her students an essay assignment: "Describe how you'd kill me, using at least 3 gerunds, 3 infinitives, and 3 participles"
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(53)
 


Wed January 14, 2015
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Reality: Banks can't play Russian roulette with your money. Jamie Dimon: Banks are "under assault"
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(103)
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
NASCAR driver Kurt Busch claims his ex-girlfriend is a trained assassin
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(57)
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Normally, being arrested for domestic assault would be terrible news for a mayoral candidate. Of course, in this case, it took the "arrested for threatening a man with an AR-15 rifle in a park" out of the news cycle. Mostly
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(90)
 
(WCPO Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Okay, YOU spend five years straight listening to him sob and ramble about Obama and the Tea Party after eight whiskey sours and we'll see if YOU don't start hearing messages from Satan on YOUR car stereo
source: wcpo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(99)
 


Tue January 13, 2015
(The Register)
 
 
 
Google assassinates a democratically-elected legal opponent
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(47)
 


Sun January 11, 2015
(Tranquil Balance)
 
 
 
Farker just opened a massage and wellness clinic. If you're in the COS area, book online and mention Farkus for a discount
source: tranquil-balance-co.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(21)
 


Sat January 10, 2015
(Mother Nature Network)
 
 
 
For once Sweden's Gavle Goat made it through a holiday season without getting torched by arsons, assaulted by drunks, or being run over by a Volvo
source: mnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(28)
 
(The Cambridge Chronicle)
 
 
 
By identical 14-7 votes, the Newton, Massachusetts Board of Aldermen decided to keep a River Street property in the Business 1 zoning district and eliminate nuclear weapons within five years
source: newton.wickedlocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(41)
 
(Boston Globe)
 
 
 
Stop me if you've heard this one before...George Zimmerman arrested on aggravated assault ch
source: bostonglobe.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(506)
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Melissa Gilbert's breasts reduced by half-pint
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(79)
 


Fri January 09, 2015
(Stars and Stripes)
 
 
 
US military commissaries overseas facing critical food shortages. Easy, just feed dependent wives, kids MREs. Problem solved
source: stripes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(165)
 


Thu January 08, 2015
(io9)
 
 
 
Bible scholars claim apostle Judas might have been member of anti-Roman 'Sicarii' assassin order. People's Front of Judea, Judean Popular People's Front and Popular Front of Judea split over how to comment
source: io9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(112)
 


Wed January 07, 2015
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Respected Egyptian TV analyst claims that TV commercials are created by Freemasons sending subliminal messages about their zionist masters secret plot to control the world. In other news, someone made Alex Jones seem sane
source: elderofziyon.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(55)
 
(WorldNetDaily)
 
 
 
Republican nutjob Phyllis Schlafly says the reason there are so many sexual assaults on college campuses is that "colleges admit too many women"
source: wnd.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(161)
 


Tue January 06, 2015
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
That South Carolina man who savagely beat his uncle after he found the man sexually assaulting his girlfriend? He won't be charged with a crime
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(129)
 


Mon January 05, 2015
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Marissa Mayer's two year tenure as a Yahoo CEO may be coming to an end soon. Oh, and Yahoo's top investors want her gone too
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(88)
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Jury selection for Boston Marathon trial begins today, so congrats if you're one of the 1200 Massachusetts residents that the Feds think have been living under a rock for the last year and a half
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(108)
 


Sun January 04, 2015
(Fox News)
 
 
 
If you're a resident of Massachusetts, you can now use your Air Jordans in lieu of bail money
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
(31)
 

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