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500 headlines found matching 'Police'
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Thu September 21, 2017
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(WGNO)
 
 
 
Man caught stealing from Home Depot escapes from police by completing the redneck triathalon - driving his truck into a lake, swimming across and then running across the Interstate
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rare.us)
 
 
 
18-year-old Illinois man steals bulldozer, runs over squad car, leads police on chase and ends with a faceplant on the pavement. Tah Dah (with video suitable for Yakety Sax)
source: rare.us   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTVR)
 
 
 
You know how actors pretend to get shot in their bulletproof vests and pop right back up? A real police officer shows the ginormous bruise the bullet leaves behind when someone shoots your vest. (Possibly NSFW)
source: wtvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Controversial and generally unhinged former sheriff David Clarke threatens to rape reporter and his horse
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(paNOW)
 
 
 
You've just boldly stolen some vodka. Do you drink some then cause a disturbance at the correctional centre?
source: panow.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed September 20, 2017
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
With typical British understatement, UK police say the mysterious object that forced the closure of a major highway today was a trash bag full of "possibly hydrochloric acid" and they are "keeping an open mind as to how the object was left there"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Riverfront Times)
 
 
 
St. Louis business owner speaking out after violence, threats, and harassment are thrown his way -- by the St. Louis Police Department and its union
source: riverfronttimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
Four University of Utah students spray paint BYU cougar statue in front of football stadium. And they would have gotten away with it too, if they didn't come back for selfies with their artwork
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
An Iowa woman has gone all the way to the state Supreme Court by arguing that the speeding ticket she was issued after being caught speeding by a camera violated her constitutional rights because police can't delegate their police powers
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCPO Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Man dies in attempted murder-suicide, which really makes you wonder what would've happened if the attempt had been successful
source: wcpo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Today in Blue Lives Matter, police shoot deaf man carrying, "metal pipe with leather loop on one end"
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ottawa Citizen)
 
 
 
Drug dealer's cunning plan to get back into jail to sell pot to inmates. Throw a rock at police cruiser: ✓ Get arrested: ✓ Tossed back in Jail: ✓ Pull 8 Kinder Eggs out of your ass while guards are watching: Surprise
source: ottawacitizen.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pitchfork)
 
 
 
The tracklist for Morrissey's new album reads like the comment section from the Politics tab or the Daily Mail
source: pitchfork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Colorado cops search for poop-and-run jogger. The squat and pop runner. The ol' drop and dung. The stop and shart. The crouch and crap. OK, I'm done now
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Journal Times)
 
 
 
Two 8-year-old boys fight, then go home. Neighbor doesn't think fight is done, drags one kid from his home, makes them fight again
source: journaltimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
White person who painted WHITE POWER and swastikas all over the neighborhood will not be charged with a crime
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue September 19, 2017
(Vox)
 
 
 
White supremacist arrested without incident after murdering two black men
source: vox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
Man being pursued by state police breaks off chase to fill out job application
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
69 diesel-gate Volkswagens stolen from purgatory
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Flathead Beacon)
 
 
 
Overseas hackers extorting Montana community via cyber threats. This is what happens when you don't upgrade from Windows XP
source: flatheadbeacon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS4Denver - KCNC)
 
 
 
Life imitates Bob's Burgers as Colorado police search for Mad Pooper
source: denver.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Enough fentanyl to kill 32 million people seized in Queens, meaning Florida residents will need to find a new way to get through this hurricane season
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Union Leader)
 
 
 
Large circle of mysterious and unidentifiable purple powder found on school property has baffled authorities, as security footage shows no one visiting the area
source: unionleader.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salon)
 
 
 
Police officers are not a disenfranchised minority
source: salon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon September 18, 2017
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Few things qualify as more hoonigan than doing a burnout in a car being towed on a trailer
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Three words you never want to see in a business plan: "Sex Doll Rental"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
This story of a slam poet and a stolen house gets weirder the further down you go
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
There's a time and place to take selfies and check your backpack, and it's not while A) Riding a motorcycle on a motorway; B) Practicing wheelies; C) Doing 117 mph; D) Being followed by the police; or E) Any or all of these
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Woman with a gun, threatening to shoot herself? Don't worry, the Florida Police are there to help with that
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Showing they really took that "de-escalation" training to heart, St Louis cops in riot gear shout "Whose streets? OUR Streets" after dispersing protesters angry over the acquittal of an officer who murdered a suspect and planted a gun on him
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click On Detroit)
 
 
 
Police to armed robbers of Boost Mobile: "Where you at?"
source: clickondetroit.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun September 17, 2017
(Fox 8 Cleveland)
 
 
 
Father arrested for chasing his young daughter through their neighborhood while wearing a clown mask, which he said he was doing to punish her. Seems like a sensible punishment
source: fox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCPO Cincinnati)
 
 
 
Finally, white people will be getting tickets from cops
source: wcpo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Man dies in fake haunted house. On the bright side, it should be legitimately haunted now
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Time)
 
 
 
Would-be pizza robber arrested after other robbers beat him to the punch
source: time.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
U2 cancels St. Louis show after promoters and officials determine there's no way Bono won't make things worse
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Juggalos complain about being labeled a gang. They're more of a social organization like the Moose Lodge only with clown make-up and horrible music
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat September 16, 2017
(NPR)
 
 
 
The State of California just extended the world's largest middle finger toward Trump and Sessions
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medium)
 
 
 
St. Louis Police lay siege to a Synagogue housing peaceably assembled demonstrators as Trump Supporters start a Gas The Synagogue social media campaign. Bonus: Little old lady beaten with riot gear, trampled, and dragged by police
source: medium.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Local10 WPLG)
 
 
 
London terror threat level raised to: Everybody Panic
source: local10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
DOJ decides police departments have been scrutinized enough
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Top vice cop busted stealing money from evidence lockers. If only there were some organization out there where honest citizens could band together and police the community. Maybe call it Citizens On Patrol or something
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri September 15, 2017
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
You can take the Floridians out of Florida, but you can't take Florida out of Floridians. You'll just have to take their car out of the swimming pool instead
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
After another school shooting, the Sheriff of Spokane said " we as a society need to make a determination as to what's causing this," and listed possible suspects like the media, bad parenting, video games, poor mental health care, and NOTHING ELSE
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
Couple busted for filming themselves having sex in public library definitely looks like they have a librarian fetish
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Aspen police: Don't take selfies with bears
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Nothing says, "I'm a person who doesn't understand anything about anything," like Trump asking Bill Gates to turn off the internet to stop terrorism
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
After weeks of delays for fears of riots, cop acquitted of murder. Judge said cop's use of personal firearm and yelling "I'm going to kill this motherfarker" was ambiguous and not indicative of intent
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
One of those "hot cops" from Hurricane Irma is, according to his Facebook history, an anti-Semite. There's always something
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
It's come to this: Police officer sues claiming he can't get a promotion because he's white
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inland Valley Daily Bulletin)
 
 
 
Los Angeles County Fair had judges awarding blue ribbons to hogs and cows inside, while a California DMV sting sent bogus handicap placard owners to see the judge outside
source: dailybulletin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Motel 6 employees will no longer get the ICE for every Hispanic guest
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu September 14, 2017
(CBS Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Two-year-old police dog can sniff out hidden child porn faster than Jared Fogle can eat a sub
source: philadelphia.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Riverfront Times)
 
 
 
Local police: Come see our maths and our braveries for battling remoteness and humidity as we eradicate this jungle of marijuana. Public: Dude, that's wild hemp. Local authorities: Quick... Shut up, delete the post, release the crickets
source: riverfronttimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Protesters grab the charging Wall Street Bull by the horns, violate its head with blue paint to protest climate change denial. No word on whether they grabbed its balls for extra excitement
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Protip: If you hear moaning coming from the bedroom of your estranged wife, just let it go
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
1,800 students locked in dorms, 55 police officers helpless to assist after heroic security guard subdues his own shoulder
source: startribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
I'se the b'y that builds the boat / and I'se the b'y that sails her / and e's the b'y that stole some chicken an' jammed it down 'is ferks, lord tunderin'
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Who orders a $4,000 painting and steaks and has UPS leave them on the front porch?
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTVO Kirksville)
 
 
 
"Another bear sighting in SE Iowa: Can Goldilocks be far behind?", asks TV station not familiar with the chronological order of the story
source: ktvo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Actual headline: Self-proclaimed 'most vile man' posts threatening video on YouTube after motel massage goes awry
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
Salt Lake mayor: "At least 6 separate policies were broken in arrest of nurse who wasn't breaking any"
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed September 13, 2017
(Think Progress)
 
 
 
Arizona Motel 6 makes it really easy for guests to get ice
source: thinkprogress.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNTV Chicago)
 
 
 
Police seek ring of bank card skimmers who were apparently extras in Avatar
source: wgntv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(E! Online)
 
 
 
Josh Duggar's sisters don't want him around for some reason
source: eonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Florida cop hotties have the internet all in a tizzy
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Rejiggered traffic cams help catch Phoenix wrong-way drivers. The rejiggered cams alert controllers to call police. Completely rejiggered cams will flash the driver. I just like saying rejiggered
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IndyStar)
 
 
 
As the smoke over marijuana clears, Indiana can't quite decide if it has legalized a liquid cannabis extract or not. Even state excise police are confused. They raided 57 stores -- and then decided they shouldn't have confiscated the product
source: indystar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Much like the horror that America witnessed when a lawn chair blew over during a natural disaster, the Brits are horrifyied that a recycling bin has been blown over by Storm Aileen
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Chainsaw-wielding nun clears debris from Irma in Florida
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Tired of a mentally ill man in a standoff with police jumping from roof to roof, an 83-year-old grandfather climbs up and throws the individual off the roof to the waiting police (with poor quality video)
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun)
 
 
 
Ma'am, you did buy the deluxe car wash, which includes polishing your headlights. Sorry for the confusion (possible Not safe for work content on page)
source: thesun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Intercept)
 
 
 
News: House passes amendment. Whoa: By voice vote. Fark: Restricting Asset Forfeiture
source: theintercept.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue September 12, 2017
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
What's wrong, have you never seen a man in a bra before?
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ITV)
 
 
 
UK Police and prison officer pay to rise by more than 1% but less than 2%. Basically anything in this general area. Anything between the ashtray, and the thimbles. Anything in this three inches. Right in here, this area, that includes the Chiclets
source: itv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Root)
 
 
 
Someone paints a statue of Columbus's hands with red paint. Police are calling it a hate crime. Fifteenth century Italian community reportedly shaken, worried
source: theroot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Man sprays penis on truck in road rage incident (Possibly not safe for work)
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Top contender for "Resting biatch Face" mugshot of the year shoots homeless man because he dared ask her to move her Porsche SUV
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Suspect wearing panda costume steals airsoft rifle from Dick's. And what does a Panda want with an airsoft rifle?
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Turns out Nazi Tiki torches are against the fire code
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Some things are worth fighting for, like serving hot coffee while wearing a bikini
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Indy Channel)
 
 
 
After the train passes, the crossing arm fails to rise to its upright position. The best thing to do is: A) drive around it, B) find another railroad crossing, or C) remove the bolts and toss it into a ditch
source: theindychannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon September 11, 2017
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
That's no way to treat the Destroyer of Worlds
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Missing woman found in hotel freezer. Police charged $13 just for picking her up and putting her back
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Seriously, who throws a yoga mat at the White House?
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Sometimes getting Darwined sucks, sometimes Darwin forgets to turn on the turbines at the Hoover Dam
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Man threatens McDonald's staff with his penis in one hand and a knife in the other. Says he just wanted to have it his way
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
'These people need to be protected': Police won't release info on lynching of 8-year-old biracial boy
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Reset the clock
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun September 10, 2017
(Coconuts)
 
 
 
Thai woman cons 8 men by marrying them and then disappearing right after collecting the dowry money from the families. Here goes the bride
source: coconuts.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat September 09, 2017
(Kansas City)
 
 
 
Librarian who was arrested and charged with assaulting a police officer for defending a man's freedom of speech found not guilty. Librarian celebrates like all good librarians do: with a good bottle of scotch
source: kansascity.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marin Independent Journal)
 
 
 
Don't brag to strangers in a hotel hot tub that you are in the illegal drug business. Especially if the strangers are narcotics officers attending a two-week specialized narcotics training course
source: marinij.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
California: Remember how we were told that making marijuana an above-board business would shut down illegal growers? About that
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Stephen King meets Bangor's other celebrity: The Duck of Justice
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
LaSalle County, Illinois prosecutor facing 17 felony counts related to running an unauthorized vigilante unit illegally stopping and searching 'suspicious' vehicles along I-80 for weed. What a go-getter
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Cambridge Chronicle)
 
 
 
High school seniors teach juniors a lesson for parking in the wrong spots. Local police teach seniors a lesson for parking in the spots wrong
source: braintree.wickedlocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri September 08, 2017
(KnoxNews)
 
 
 
Responsible gun owner proves that the second amendment is twice as cool as the first
source: knoxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Gee, I wonder who he voted for
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Journal News)
 
 
 
Before signing up with a financial trading company, make sure they have the ability to enforce stops
source: lohud.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Australians turn in 26,000 guns during amnesty campaign. Americans ask if that's one guy, one family or in one small town
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu September 07, 2017
(Scotsman)
 
 
 
U.S. government "found no evidence" that United Airlines violated Dr. Dao's civil rights. I guess YouTube is blocked in government offices
source: scotsman.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC2News Baltimore)
 
 
 
Shoot Out at the Taco Bell
source: abc2news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Outkick the Coverage)
 
 
 
Michael Bennett is lying. But Twitter demanded a hero be crowned, and that hero was Michael Bennett
source: outkickthecoverage.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Lititz Teens come forward about their "It" Prank. You better believe there is a Skyler and Brianna in the group, too
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Local)
 
 
 
Please note: it is now legal to fart on Berlin Police
source: thelocal.de   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Missing toddler found in corn field, insists he was only trying to "go the distance" to "ease his pain"
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AOL)
 
 
 
11-year-old finds gun, shoots himself. Police say parents need to teach kids to be more careful, point it at other people
source: aol.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Bentonville police said a thief trudged through the fountain waters and took off with a nearly 30-pound cannonball from a Confederate statue
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
Texas woman goes full Thelma and Louise after getting arrested for shoplifting. Never go full Thelma and Louise
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Centre Daily Times)
 
 
 
Loses loose a Lose or Lose loses Loses?
source: centredaily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Nazis are invading your town and you want to stop them. Do you call: A) The police; B) Black Lives Matter; C) The Coup Clutz Clowns
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed September 06, 2017
(Comet TV)
 
 
 
The 24 most terrifying puppets in movie history. Difficulty: no "Team America: World Police"
source: comettv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KTLA Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Man causes $2,000 in damages to 7-Eleven after being told he couldn't use the phone. What did he do, burn it to the ground?
source: ktla.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Betsy DeVos: It's just despicable how rapists are being held back from what they do best. Today that changes
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
Parents say they weren't notified of inappropriate touching at school summer camp, urged to check on condition of band flutes
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Sports)
 
 
 
Michael Bennett details the night when he was detained for "running to safety"
source: cbssports.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Police "terrified" by couple of red balloons tied to sewer grates. Wait 'til they get a load of Nena
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue September 05, 2017
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Body found in Ontario fridge identified as Indy Jones, Jr. Sacre' bleu
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
12-year-old claims diplomatic immunity - Murtaugh getting too old for this shiat
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
Salt Lake nurse-arresting cop fired from side job at ambulance company
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KWQC Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Burglars break into local GOP headquarters, no doubt looking for the party's direction
source: kwqc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KOIN Portland)
 
 
 
What started with a report of stolen leaf blowers and a pickup truck getaway vehicle ends with a stolen truck crashing into a house, a woman throwing her kid into a random passing car, and the male driver swallowing a bunch of heroin
source: koin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon September 04, 2017
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
"I didn't know people on benefits were into champagne," judge tells person on government assistance
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston Herald)
 
 
 
A trooper has saved a kitty and now the State Police invite you to play - Name That Cat
source: bostonherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Don't Get Involved)
 
 
 
Good Samaritan notices guy shoplifting at 7-11, offers to pay for item's he's stealing. Very "Chicken Soup For The Soul" The reality is shoplifter fights with Samaritan before fleeing. Guy then surprises Samaritan outside 7-11 with an axe melee
source: wehoville.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Yes, my wife is dead, I'm covered in blood, and there's a knife beside me. But trust me, it had to be the cold medicine. It's been jealous of me since we were kids
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Remember that patient who nearly had his blood drawn without consent? Well, he's also an officer, and his department is hailing the nurse a hero. Get your popcorn ready
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun September 03, 2017
(SFGate)
 
 
 
No, Mom, we did not barricade ourselves naked inside the church because we were 'fearless'. It was spice, I mean spicy food. Thats it. Now bail us out
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat September 02, 2017
(Above the Law)
 
 
 
Fire ALL the cops
source: abovethelaw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(US Army)
 
 
 
Weaponizing Ridicule: Venezuelan women stripped off their pants and threw them at riot police, taunting the already demoralized young men to "man up" and put them on
source: armyupress.army.mil   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Police officer who arrested nurse for the crime of reading the hospital's blood draw policy may face charges. In other news pigs seen flying nearby, a snowball is seen in hell, and the Cubs win the World Series. Oh wait
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
An armed society may not be so polite
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 News Dallas)
 
 
 
Nope, Nope, NOPE
source: fox4news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri September 01, 2017
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
When choosing someone to perform elective surgery, it's generally not a good idea to pick a tourist who has only been in your country for four days
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(hardwarezone)
 
 
 
Uber is finding out the hard way that using software to evade regulators is just like using anything else to evade regulators. Especially when it comes to the definition of criminal intent
source: hardwarezone.com.sg   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Looks like the FBI and DHS are back to using the words "domestic terrorist" again-but only to describe the "Anti-fa" guys who show up at rallies in ski masks carrying broomsticks, not say, the guys in full body armor and rifles on the other side
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Refuse to take blood from an unconscious patient without a warrant? You better believe that's a out-of-control arrestin'. Bonus: the victim RN was an Olympian
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metronews.ca)
 
 
 
If convicted the accused will be given a lifetime ban on the possession of airsoft guns
source: metronews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
The police officer who reassured the scared, white, female motorist that "we only shoot black people" has retired
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Indy100)
 
 
 
As you most surely know, Queen Elizabeth owns many of the swans in England. So what do you do if you're 5 years old and want one to keep in the tub? You write to the queen, of course
source: indy100.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Haven Independent)
 
 
 
But it was the note the suspect allegedly handed to the teller - reading "This is a robbery, give me 5,000 nobody gets shot." - "The opposite side of the note appeared to be a payroll stub," the warrant says
source: valley.newhavenindependent.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hollywood Reporter)
 
 
 
HBO officially renews True Detective for a third season
source: hollywoodreporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
'Dear Penthouse, I used to think a threesome with your wife and the babysitter only took place in the movies. Until it happened to me'
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Salt Lake Tribune)
 
 
 
A nurse following a policy the hospital lawyers and police department agreed to regarding blood draws? You better bet that's an arrest. Hero tag is for the nurse
source: sltrib.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABL13 Houston)
 
 
 
Houston Police Chief says he won't tolerate criminals and looters taking advantage of people during Hurricane Harvey. That behavior is reserved for motels, stores and gas stations
source: abc13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu August 31, 2017
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds". Wait, what KIND of snow? And why is this kid asking me for $2?
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TMJ4 Milwaukee)
 
NewsFlash
 
For no reason whatsoever, Sheriff Clarke just resigned
source: tmj4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Stupid: Deciding to rob a bar. Full Retard: Robbing a bar full of police officers who are celebrating a coworker's retirement. The Baltimore Sun is there
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Confused if your currency is fake or not? The foreign writing printed on it might be a dead giveaway, Einstein
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kenosha News)
 
 
 
Drunk speeds away from cops, crashes car, then tries to run away. He succeeds. By jumping off a 25-foot interstate overpass
source: kenoshanews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Great Falls Tribune)
 
 
 
Woman who drowned while kayaking the Missouri River had a BAC of .399. Why, yes, her name was Brandy
source: greatfallstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed August 30, 2017
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Woman (70 years old) fined for falling asleep at the wheel and clipping a guardrail. Her goats were fine, by the way
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBTV 3 Charlotte)
 
 
 
You won't get too far when you rob and kidnap an undercover officer during a drug sting
source: wbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
"Crying Nazi" cries MOAR
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
DHS says it warned Virginia about potential trouble in Charlottesville three days before the clashes took place, though it's understandable why Virginia wasn't alarmed by a report that "many fine people" were headed towards the town
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Woman found dead with rosary beads stuffed in her mouth. Police "investigating". Meanwhile, "Earlier in the day, the woman's boyfriend was in the street naked and ranting about the devil"
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Police stop a deer on a toll bridge for 'toll evasion'
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Inside Higher Ed)
 
 
 
Trump administration hires former DeVry University official as new head of Education Department unit meant to police fraud. Why yes, DeVry recently settled a $100 million case with the FTC for defrauding students, why do you ask?
source: insidehighered.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kitchener Record)
 
 
 
A man in a green thong says police were wrong when they took his bong. Why can't we all get along?
source: therecord.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Woman, 26, blows grandmother's £22,000 savings on a hot tub, a drone, an iPad, and a sex toy. The rest she wasted
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue August 29, 2017
(St. Louis American)
 
 
 
As of Monday, it is legal for your boss to fly into Missouri, wander around the airport drunk to come into town to discriminate against you and to cut your city minimum wage back to the state level
source: stlamerican.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Olympic runner found dead in pool. What's next, Olympic swimmer found dead on track?
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Woman found dead in car at It's Not Dead Festival
source: vvng.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Cop walks up to a motorcyclist at a stoplight with gun drawn and starts yelling. You bet your sweet bippy the victim was white; he lived to tell the tale. Hero tag is for the victim: he videoed the encounter and got the detective suspended
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Please note: you're not going to earn much street cred as a serial burglar when your getaway vehicle is a little girl's bicycle
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Star)
 
 
 
Dear Ellie: My ex-con boyfriend is refusing to move out. What do?
source: thestar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Express)
 
 
 
"You're free to kill the idiots," Philippines president Rodrigo Duterte tells his secret police force regarding suspects resisting arrest (possible Not safe for work content on page)
source: express.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
The old, "It wasn't prostitution because I was filming the sex act which makes it protected by free speech laws" doesn't fly in Arizona
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(APM Marketplace)
 
 
 
As always, the answer to the headline is no. In this case, NO
source: marketplace.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
The $1,000 in drug money nearly rectum
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Great Falls Tribune)
 
 
 
Man charged with robbing magazine salesman is looking at time, maybe even life
source: greatfallstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon August 28, 2017
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
If you're going to rob an internet cafe, don't 1. Drop the cash 2. Go over the speed limit on a deserted highway full of cops
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSNBC)
 
 
 
It's Monday, so a fresh week of WTF awaits us. Today, Two Scoops decided the police need more military surplus equipment, and more details about Trump Tower Russia appeared. It's your Hayes/Maddow/O'Donnell discussion thread, starts at 8PM EDT
source: msnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Homeless man who gained national fame after pouring coffee on himself for $5 gets hit by car, dies
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AL.com)
 
 
 
Mugshot of dude who stole a school bus, then tossed a gun out the window during a massive police chase looks exactly like you'd expect
source: al.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(English Russia)
 
 
 
Russian anti-riot police roll out the Schit
source: englishrussia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Blue lives can finally feel safe as your local cops will be able to get grenade launchers and military armored vehicles again
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Miami Herald)
 
 
 
One man Fark Party in Beaufort County, South Carolina. "The man handed deputies a brown bag and claimed it was hallucinogenic mushrooms, at which time he also told police he had recently consumed some"
source: miamiherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Crash that killed PA State Trooper investigated by the State Police and you won't believe who they decided was at fault
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun August 27, 2017
(Reuters)
 
 
 
In America, heroes are born out of circumstance, not fabricated out of thin air
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Shot dead teen found in the back of Akron police cruiser. Shot was heard after three arrested teens were placed in three separate police cruisers. This week on Unsolved Mysteries
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABL13 Houston)
 
 
 
Houston, we have a problem
source: abc13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Apparently, Charlottesville racist who attempted to shoot into crowd of counter-protesters was a mutant because he was invisible to the police standing beside him
source: huffingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat August 26, 2017
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Oklahoma police chief outed as owner of white supremacist record label
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Florida woman threatens suicide. SWAT team says, don't worry we'll help
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
This is your captain speaking. Sorry for the additional delay folks. We're going to have to hold here while the drunken gentlemen who were just removed from the plane duke it out with police on the tarmac
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
As expected, the vultures are swooping over the Massachusetts lottery winner's house. Police patrols have increased
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATC Acadiana)
 
 
 
Driver hits three pedestrians. Guess who's charged with a crime. Difficulty: Louisiana
source: katc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri August 25, 2017
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
13-year-old driver arrested after police find 25 pounds of meth in car, because nothing avoids suspicion like 13-year-old kids driving cars
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Consumerist)
 
 
 
Sheriff's office gives advice to citizens about alligators displaced by hurricane flooding. "Don't go near them. Wait until the waters recede". Now that is some mighty fine police work, Lou
source: consumerist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Texas Tribune)
 
 
 
You know, a looming hurricane is a great way to round up some illegals
source: texastribune.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KATV Little Rock)
 
 
 
Okay, quick, make a headline with "high speed chase" "Hummer" and "casket"
source: katv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu August 24, 2017
(Boomstick Comics)
 
 
 
James Gunn is set to reboot Guardians of the Galaxy, but with Starsky and Hutch
source: boomstickcomics.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
This is what happens when you illegally park your car in China
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Active shooter situation in Charleston (live feed in article)
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Gimme an O. Gimme a U. Gimme a C. Gimme an H
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Well there's a weapon you don't see used that often in an attempted robbery
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
Who do you believe?
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Blubbering Nazi hopefully about to get something to actually cry about
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed August 23, 2017
(Herald Tribune (SW Florida))
 
 
 
Off-duty deputy saves couple from burning car by shooting it. No, really
source: heraldtribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
If you left a suitcase full of drugs on the bus we have great news. It's been found. So just swing by the police station to collect it
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Barcelona attackers were going full Sagrada Família. You don't even think of going partial Sagrada Família
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Trump vows to close Federal government so the wall can be built
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue August 22, 2017
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Say what you will about Florida Man, but at least he knows to purchase proper eye protection for viewing an eclipse. The whole 'while being tailed by the cops for car theft' is another matter, though
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MassLive)
 
 
 
Boston counterprotests were so violent the Boston Police Department arrested 22 people at them. No wait I'm sorry they arrested 22 people at a seafood festival held the same day in a different part of town
source: masslive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
German police seize 5,000 Trump-shaped ecstasy pills. No word if they make you use the best words or stare at the sun when bigly high
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Onion AV Club)
 
 
 
Imagine a mansion designed by a '70s Indianapolis pimp known as "Mr. Big" by the police and see how your fantasy compares with his reality
source: avclub.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(12News Phoenix)
 
 
 
It's never a good idea to make a terror threat on your high school via social media
source: 12news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
If you've bought avocados on Facebook, they were probably stolen. In other news, people buy produce on Facebook
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Man tries to carjack three football players. With mugshot goodness
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon August 21, 2017
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Virginia issues FOUR arrest warrants for the crying Nazi. Many more to follow
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
You didn't really think the NYPD was going to listen to that dirty rotten hippy wannabe of a mayor when it comes down to arresting peaceful people for low-level marijuana possession
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Four bedrooms, three baths, great schools. I'll throw in no closing costs and a dead body for qualified buyers
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Meh: Guys booted off flight for being drunk. Fark: Cops booted off flight for being drunk. Double Fark: NYPD top brass kicked off USAF flight for being drunk
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Ohio judge ambushed, shoots back. Shooter was the dad of one of the Steubenville football rape guys
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
33-year-old woman killed in 14-story fall, leaves three children 10, 12 and 16, and one six-month-old grandchild
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WJAC TV Johnstown)
 
 
 
Old and busted: placing an ad on Craigslist looking for a hitman to kill your spouse. New hotness: placing an ad on Craigslist impersonating your spouse looking for a hitman to kill you
source: wjactv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Submarine builder: Reporter died accidentally so I buried her at sea, er, in the bay
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
This Week in the Federal Courts: Bed and Breakfast and Brothel gets off while the police chief doesn't, cop can testify against other cops in BB gun shooting, and breaking a drunk driver's back to keep him from hurting himself might be excessive
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ESPN)
 
 
 
Anquan Boldin to retire after 14 seasons in the NFL to focus on humanitarian work
source: espn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Talk Radio (UK))
 
 
 
Barcelona terrorist shot dead. I'd give you more details but it's the same as every other 'terrorist shot dead' story
source: talkradio.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun August 20, 2017
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Thieves steal ATM using forklift. "Police now believe that these criminals might have some ties to the construction industry." That's some fine police work there, Lou
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Texas cop gives free unsolicited legal advice for dealing with people wanting to pull down Confederate statues. It's okay to shoot and kill them as long as it's after sundown
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Trump is demanding some sheriffs keep undocumented immigrants in local jails longer than is legally allowable under federal court rulings, which is both a massive civil liability and a civil rights violation
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Author writes a book called "The Guilty Secret" about a writer who commits a string of murders and is never caught So, guess what just happened
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Pro-tip: When the police come to your party, do not play the Cops theme
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat August 19, 2017
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Band of bobbies in Merseyside UK hit the big time with a fab drug bust, nabbing £530,000 cash and 12kg in gear
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Upper Michigan's Source)
 
 
 
You're doing it wrong
source: uppermichiganssource.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
Good news: Spanish terror cell 'completely dismantled'. Bad news: Van driver in Barcelona attack still at large
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Denver Channel)
 
 
 
"I'm looking for my teeth. Can I check your balcony?"
source: thedenverchannel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlanta Journal Constitution)
 
 
 
Mother doesn't report boyfriend molesting her 6-year-old daughter because A) she isn't aware of it, B) she fears for their safety, or C) she has a 'hectic work schedule'
source: ajc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri August 18, 2017
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Florida woman arrested for drunk driving after blowing a .sleestak
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHIO Dayton)
 
 
 
Richmond police warn McDonald's renovations could cause prostitution shift
source: whio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Fark-ready headline: Man 'tied his penis to shotgun and then shot himself in the head'
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Man's head and upper chest found in shopping cart. Police hope to make a bust
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
After "Chachi" from Happy Days rips Sen. Marco Rubio's response to the Barcelona terror attacks, Lil' Marco gets Biblical on him: "Fools take no delight in understanding, but only in displaying what they think. Proverbs 18:2"
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
NewsFlash
 
Several people stabbed in Finland. Suspect shot by police and is in custody
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Chicago)
 
 
 
This *isn't* how you protest confederate statues
source: nbcchicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Thu August 17, 2017
(South Jersey Courier-Post)
 
 
 
If you don't want the police to find your drug operation, don't put your alligator in the hotel swimming pool
source: courierpostonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Wed August 16, 2017
(Washington Examiner)
 
 
 
"Respect for law has broken down" says man who evaded legal consequences for perjury
source: washingtonexaminer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Jorts are making a comeback....with Walgreens robbers
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Police search for man caught having sex with a chain-link fence after he fails to appear in court. Meanwhile, de fence rests
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ReformJudaism.org)
 
 
 
An account of what happened outside a Charlottesville synagogue on Saturday
source: reformjudaism.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
'I'm terrified': Big tough neo-Nazi blubbers like a baby in video reporting he's wanted for arrest in Charlottesville
source: rawstory.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yellowhammer News)
 
 
 
Sign this woman up for the show Naked and Afraid
source: yellowhammernews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Action News Jacksonville)
 
 
 
Actual headline: Jacksonville Beach police use 3 Tasers, baton, 4 handcuffs to arrest bar customer (Video? Yep)
source: actionnewsjax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Tue August 15, 2017
(Tacoma News Tribune)
 
 
 
Don't want to watch "Baywatch" for a second time tonight? You bet that's a macheteing
source: thenewstribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Stripper from Tampa thought his partner was a cannibal, so he stabbed him in the eyes
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Columbus Dispatch)
 
 
 
"The interior of the Chevy Cavalier was filled with damaged windows, dumpster debris, spoiled food and cigarette butts. And underneath all that - to the surprise of a Columbus police officer - a naked 3-year-old boy"
source: dispatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Telegraph)
 
 
 
Chewbacca mauls worker at Australian ski resort, is promptly apprehended by the Empire
source: dailytelegraph.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(East Bay Times)
 
 
 
Suspect your girlfriend is cheating? Can probably be resolved with a carjacking, home burglary, multiple auto thefts, an arson, 100 miles per hour police chase, vandalism, and at least four shootings
source: eastbaytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Connecticut Post)
 
 
 
Red Bull may give you wings, but it also gives you the strength to break the glass doors of a convenience store when the clerk locks you and your 12-year-old inside for shoplifting
source: ctpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Observer & Eccentric)
 
 
 
On today's episode of caught having sex in public, do they go with: A) The sucking out the poison defense B) The just sitting on his lap defense, or C) The easing back pain defense?
source: hometownlife.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TwinCities.com)
 
 
 
It's not a real teenage birthday party unless it becomes a multi-neighborhood brawl with shots fired and up to 200 people "yelling, screaming, dancing, twerking and fighting"
source: twincities.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
Suspect admits to doing meth and throwing rocks at cars believing 'the purge' was happening
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Father. Of. The. Year
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Texas A&M)
 
 
 
White Nationalist event at Texas A&M cancelled by administration. Area sheep remain on high alert
source: today.tamu.edu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon August 14, 2017
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Question: What are Vicodin, Dilaudid, Xanax, Ambien, and THC? Answer: The five drugs that Tiger Woods had in his system when he was arrested for driving under the influence last May
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Armed police officer famous for filming himself traveling at 140mph, pulls over car and is surprised to discover duck wearing a tie, a dog and an old man inside. Unclear if the man's last name was Barbera
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
"Officers were involved in a decidedly slow-speed early morning pursuit in New Orleans East when they chased down a man attempting to steal a steamroller"
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKYC Cleveland)
 
 
 
Today's police brutality incident is brought to you from Euclid, Ohio
source: wkyc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sun August 13, 2017
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Virginia governor defends police inaction to Nazi violence by noting the Nazis were heavily armed
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(UPI)
 
 
 
Police test cadets' focus with squeaky rubber chicken
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Sat August 12, 2017
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Charlottesville Police Chief is treating case of driver who intentionally rammed into protesters as "criminal homicide"
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
You know you've hit a low point when you get so embroiled in lawsuits for so many years, you've resorted to stealing sewer grates to help pay the bills
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Police search for kernel of truth to what caused massive corn cob spill. You submitted this with a butter headline
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Fri August 11, 2017
(Page Six)
 
 
 
Organizers of the National Association of Black Journalists conference decided to invite Omarosa to chair a panel despite being a Trump loyalist and not being a journalist. Naturally, real journalists were upset
source: pagesix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox9 Minneapolis)
 
 
 
Protip: when sending a letter to your employer on fake sheriff's office stationery in an attempt to keep your job while serving your six-month sentence, don't misspell any words, and do pick the name of an actual deputy to forge a signature
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(Flathead Beacon)
 
 
 
I guess if you're going to impersonate being in the Coast Guard, people on a lake in Montana would be unlikely to know what you're supposed to look like
source: flatheadbeacon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 46 Charlotte)
 
 
 
Construction workers catch guy rifling through one of their trucks. Decide to perform citizen's arrest and detain him by lashing him to scaffold
source: fox46charlotte.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Minneapolis Star Tribune)
 
 
 
Defendant acquitted in case where two Minneapolis officers forgot to turn on their body cams before punching and tazing him. Unfortunately for them, security cameras caught the whole thing
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(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
American investment banker arrested on suspicion of being the jogging shaitbag who pushed a woman in front of a London bus
source: nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Apparently, if you abandon your car in a traffic jam and start walking through a tunnel, the only thing you're guilty of is trespassing
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox Business)
 
 
 
Police officer challenges owner of 'no cops' gym to a boxing match, hoping to prove that no matter what differences two people have, they can come together to punch each other in the face a couple of times
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(USA Today)
 
 
 
O.J. Simpson's getaway Bronco is up for sale
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(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
'Celestial beings told him to change his name to Yahweh, now he and his associate are facing drug charges'
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Thu August 10, 2017
(Chron)
 
 
 
Bodycam footage shows cop jumping off highway exit ramp while trying to avoid drunk driver
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(CBS Philadelphia)
 
 
 
Drug suspect to police on social media: You can't catch me. You can't catch me. You can't catch me. Police: Challenge accepted
source: philadelphia.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Detroit)
 
 
 
If you've been bumping into women in the MoneyGram line at Walmart and then ejaculating on their dresses, the police would appreciate it if you would kindly stop
source: detroit.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Michigan Man attempts to exterminate underground nest of bees by using fire. Thanks to Florida we all know how this ends up
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Minneapolis man, who claims to have seen Bigfoot, apologizes for dressing like Bigfoot and fooling other people who believe in Bigfoot and then proceeds to divides by zero and destroy the universe (w/pics)
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(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Resident comes home from a trip and finds that someone has broken into their house and stol...uh wait, cleaned the place up and left. Police to soon release sketch of suspect, bald male wearing white shirt and pants
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(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
NRA says they didn't speak out against the shooting of Philando Castile because of reefer madness
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(Fox News)
 
 
 
Day 2 of the Taylor Swift Ass-Grabbing Trial brings an investigation of the contents of the defendant's briefs
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(CNN)
 
 
 
The latest thing from the food police to kill you: beer pong
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(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Five member white-supremacist gang arrested with hundreds of pages of American Nazi Family propaganda, meth, and weapons. In other news, these people think they're the 'master race.' Let that sink in for a moment. Take all the time you need
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Police decide to try something new, so they shoot and kill a goat. To be fair, their defense is, "It was coming right at us"
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Wed August 09, 2017
(CBS News)
 
 
 
In a move that surely won't get it a no-knock raid one night, Atlanta gym posts sign saying "No farking Cops"
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(Philly.com)
 
 
 
Mensa candidate parks his vehicle in police station parking lot because "he wanted to stop in a safe place". Yes, alcohol was involved
source: philly.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
"Na, all outa drugs. Sorry, man. Hey, want to get blown instead?"
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFSB Connecticut)
 
 
 
Chuck E. Cheese, where a kid can be a kid, and a father can kick a 6-year-old for picking up his tokens
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(SFGate)
 
 
 
And he would've gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for that meddling floater in the toilet
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Tue August 08, 2017
(The Telegraph_US)
 
 
 
You've just committed armed robbery. The best way to throw police off of your trail is: C) enter the police station and report a robbery at the store you just robbed
source: thetelegraph.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
Screaming kids scare off would-be carjackers, potential dates
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox9 Minneapolis)
 
 
 
Well the first thing you know ol Den's a millionaire. The meth said "Den put the money there"
source: fox9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Alaska Dispatch News)
 
 
 
New study discovers illegal marijuana growers are using illegally applied pesticides in illegal locations. If only there was some way to make it legal
source: adn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Forest Grove police log: "No one worshiping Satan at the library"
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Mon August 07, 2017
(CTV News)
 
 
 
Cop ruins kid's life by helping him get a job
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(Washington Post)
 
 
 
CHP pulls over vehicle and spends nearly nine minutes deescalating situation by pointing gun at occupants who pose no threat other than asking simple questions, such as, "Why do you have a gun pointed at us?"
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(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Idiot judge sentences drug stealing, drug dealing scumbag deputies to probation because their wives love them or something. Article to the left, reasoned discussion on how sentencing is applied equally to the right
source: bakersfield.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Today the DOJ announced a new initiative to...I can't even bear to look...*peeks between fingers* set guidelines on what forensic examiners can say about the accuracy and reliability of their tests to eliminate "Junk science" testimony? Oh, carry on
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 10 Phoenix)
 
 
 
Oh, that will buff right out. Gonna need a mallet to take out the dent on the roof, though
source: fox10phoenix.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Musical Express)
 
 
 
Jon Snow's cape is an IKEA rug. In fact, all of the Night's Watch capes are IKEA rugs
source: nme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Queens man's mom doubts he could take stolen "huge ass turtle" to train station by bus
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Baltimore's "Nobody Shoot Anybody" weekend was a complete BANG success BANG
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
The Dark Web has some good qualities, besides just cookies
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Sun August 06, 2017
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Fugitive so dislikes the mugshot police posted on Facebook that he turns himself in so they'll take it down
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Second deadly shooting in Baltimore's 'Nobody kill anybody' weekend. YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Let's see, did I pack everything in my luggage? Toothbrush: check. Suit: check. Twenty-year-old model I plan to sell on the dark web...wait, what?
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
So the prosecutor withheld crucial evidence and did an end run around the defendant's 5th Amendment rights. The important thing is that the DA is able to advance her career
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(Manchester Evening News)
 
 
 
The man had managed to sneak into a room unnoticed and when officers opened the door they say they discovered him again performing a sex act 'covered in lubricant'
source: manchestereveningnews.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Pittsburgh)
 
 
 
Former police officer admits to viewing pictures of naked women while on duty. "He was doing research." That's what they all say
source: pittsburgh.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 


Sat August 05, 2017
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Let's see, we've been evacuated from home for weeks due forest fires. How to celebrate coming home...I know, FIREWORKS
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(Valley News Live)
 
 
 
What's the weirdest thing you've ever put in a safety deposit box? If it beats a dead cat, a loaf of bread and a rock, you win
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(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Bibi's chief of staff turns state's evidence, testifying against him in corruption probe
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Fri August 04, 2017
(CNN)
 
 
 
A pastor, a state trooper and a convicted sex offender walk into a police station...because they were some of the more than 1,000 people arrested this month as part of a nationwide sex-trafficking sting
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(UPI)
 
 
 
Okay, first question: how did he get them on top of his car?
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
The secret identity of Captain Obvious is revealed to be Rep. Leonard Lance (R-N.J.) who told CNN that he told his town hall crowd that Trump "certainly has not been" civil in his rhetoric. and "I think the crowd agreed with that"
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Perhaps leading the police on a 120mph chase is not the best decision when driving a Volkswagen Scirocco
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WKRN Nashville)
 
 
 
We're not going to use those brand new Ford police interceptor SUVs, until we ensure that they're safe. Because, one of our officers smelled carbon monoxide. Ya know, that odorless and tasteless gas
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(NBC New York)
 
 
 
The NYPD is threatening to boycott Dunkin' Donuts. Not everybody runs on Dunkin, apparently
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 2 St. Louis)
 
 
 
You can help stop sex trafficking by taking four pictures of your hotel room and uploading them
source: fox2now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Fresh off Donny TwoScoops' shiat list, Sessions decides to threaten sanctuary cities
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(Santa Clarita Valley Signal)
 
 
 
Teenage joker's wave of social media pranks curtailed after he's hauled in by COBRA, because Knowing is half the battle
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(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
An incident involving a red-haired girl and a cucumber escalates into assault on a police officer
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Thu August 03, 2017
(CBC)
 
 
 
Noseless man who swam across river while high on meth pleads guilty to assaulting the police officer who rescued him. Why yes, this did happen in Saskatoon, how did you guess?
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(The Raw Story)
 
 
 
Cop who posted meme about drowning your White daughter if she has a crush on a Negro is totally not a racist, and he didn't intend to offend anyone, and it wasn't on purpose. According to his chief who still fired him
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(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this little girl in her police car
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