Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		Interesting music, smells coming out of New Jersey  (nytimes.com)	(29)

NJ town wants Mystery Knitter to apply for permit, clearly infringing on her constitutional right to keep and bear yarn  (nj.com)

(43)

		NJ cops use dead deer as bait in sting operation to catch a large feline that apparently drops ten-dollar bills  (nj.com)	(27)
		NJ man runs across tracks to catch a train. Catches it smack in the face  (nj.com)	(83)

		Victor Davis Hanson notes that one reason for American exceptionalism may be that we did not inherit from England "a large underclass of only quasi-free people attached to barons as serfs."  (yglesias.thinkprogress.org)	(185)
		Grizzly bears starting turf war with Polar bears on Hudson Bay. Stephen Colbert last seen running in terror towards New Jersey  (npr.org)	(27)

Big Booty Mommas 6: Hot Butt-Caulking Action  (nj.com)

(234)

Does a school have the right to punish a student for an act committed on the weekend? Welcome to New Jersey  (npr.org)

(206)

Lebron James is going to play with new jersey next season. No, not that New Jersey    (sports.yahoo.com)

(99)

(Lohud.com)

NJ family takes down snow Venus de Milo after complaints that it wasn't orange enough  (lohud.com)

(112)

		NJ Nets trade themselves to Newark  (nj.com)	(11)
		Pod of dolphins swims 12 miles up New Jersey river, mocks mankind for watching "Jersey Shore"  (upi.com)	(39)

(US Magazine)

You may have to sit down for this one: Jersey Shore's JWoww and Snooki admit they are not Italian  (usmagazine.com)

(98)

		Class warfare through tax policy may make progressives feel warm and cozy inside, but it hurts state economies: New Jersey lost $70 billion in wealth as the rich fled high income tax rates  (nj.com)	(587)
		The Nets get one for the thumb  (news.yahoo.com)	(10)

In New Jersey, eco-friendly funerals are in style - cement goulashes are out  (nj.com)

(37)

Can Danica hang with the likes of Earnhardt Jr or Tony Stewart? Your Drive4COPD 300 at Daytona discussion thread  (nationwide.nascar.com)

(176)

In their last game before the All-Star Break, the Nets keep pace to match the 1972-73 76ers all-time losing record. The good news? Only 1,016 saw it  (sports.espn.go.com)

(28)

(Some Scranton to Hoboken Guy)

Lackawanna Cut-Off cut off for Lackawanna  (thetimes-tribune.com)

(139)

Not news: Devils win News: by scoring 3 goals in the last 3 minutes Fark: with the last 2 goals in the last 30 seconds  (msn.foxsports.com)

(42)

"Mr. Smoot could not be reached. Calls to his office in New Jersey were returned by a spokeswoman who insisted that her name was Zoe Hamburger."  (cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com)

(22)

		Atlanta Thrashers sell their souls and Ilya Kovalchuk to the New Jersey Devils  (sports.espn.go.com)	(56)
		Children are reminded not to take candy from strangers. Even if they have delicious Skittles® and Starburst® candies  (nj.com)	(54)
		New Jersey Nets assistant coach Del Harris makes the smartest decision all season -- he quits  (sports.yahoo.com)	(29)

Senator Orrin Hatch says Guantanamo is "pretty nice compared to Illinois"; New Jersey is enjoying the schadenfreude  (swamppolitics.com)

(28)

Pudgy male pols are considered more reliable and honest than their thinner counterparts. In other news, NJ has their most honest governor ever  (nydailynews.com)

(25)

Passaic County SWAT team gets a $400,000 armored vehicle. It's airtight, with a 10-hour air supply, making it especially useful for driving down the NJ Turnpike  (nj.com)

(102)

Don't put the sun tan lotion away just yet - 'Jersey Shore' finale shatters MTV records. We got a situation  (nj.com)

(79)

Hundreds of Haiti Earthquake victims arrive in New Jersey. Immediately inquire as to the availability of return flights    (huffingtonpost.com)

(77)

Congratulations 8-year-old Cub Scout Mikey Hicks, you are a terrorist  (wcbstv.com)

(163)

Mother goes to school board meeting to complain about boys pulling down her 13-year-old daughter's pants. Superintendent: Was she wearing a thong? Fark: Mom gets arrested for normal parent's reaction to the question  (myfoxny.com)

(367)

		Orange man charged in New Jersey shooting. That certainly narrows it down to the entire state    (nj.com)	(146)
(Springfield News-Leader)		Dumbass tag trumps fail tag as three men use a stun gun to kidnap a man and take him 1200 miles away, only to find out they kidnapped the wrong man  (news-leader.com)	(40)

Self-important ass-douche who caused the shutdown of Newark Liberty Airport has been identified and arrested. He's a doctoral student at Rutgers who had to be at the gym in 26 minutes  (suntimes.com)

(366)

Where should a father take his reunited son he barely knows who speaks little English to avoid the press, c) Disney World on the busiest day of the year  (nydailynews.com)

(56)

New Jersey asks MTV to cancel Jersey Shore. Rest of the country asks Congress to cancel New Jersey  (msnbc.msn.com)

(66)

New Jersey initiates "Silver Alert" system to help locate missing seniors. Plans for an "Orange Alert" system abandoned after MTV beat them to the punch  (nj.com)

(43)

New Jersey's Republican governor-elect to slash state spending and programs by 25 percent. Essential programs such as hair gel subsidies are exempt  (nj.com)

(192)

NJ pharmacist charged with stealing 3,670 Valium. Asked to comment, he said, "Mmmrrrphhlll" and lolled his head around  (nj.com)

(49)

(Some Guy)

Animal survives in wild  (nbcnewyork.com)

(100)

Jack Nicholson and Danny DeVito inducted into the New Jersey Hall of Fame. Talk about a dubious honor  (contactmusic.com)

(33)

		0-18. New Jersey Nets = Detroit Lions of basketball  (espn.go.com)	(114)
		New Jersey likely to legalize medical marijuana, which can help to alleviate the pain of having to live in New Jersey    (online.wsj.com)	(74)

NJ Nets rearrange the deck chairs on the Titanic  (nytimes.com)

(24)

New Jersey Nets plummet to 0-16, losing to lowly Sacramento Kings. Two non-wins away from history  (sports.yahoo.com)

(13)

Good: New Jersey Nets close in on NBA record. Bad: It's the record for most consecutive losses to start a season  (sports.yahoo.com)

(20)

"Jersey Shore" a guido-fied Real World, may be cancelled before it airs its first episode. Then again, it's on MTV so it will probably run for thirteen years  (msnbc.msn.com)

(52)