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Headlines matching 'Life'
Sat February 11, 2012
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Daily Mail) Sad Graffiti artist who made $200m in Facebook IPO says he was offered oral sex every day for the rest of his life for $2m. You should really have a talk with your Mom  (dailymail.co.uk) (126)
(Oregon Live) Caturday Going from life on the streets as a feral to being a Blue Ribbon winner is not easy - but as Tank the cat will tell you, it's a long way to the top if you wanna rock 'n roll on Caturday  (oregonlive.com) (399)


Fri February 10, 2012
(AZCentral) Stupid Charles Barkley is unhappy with the decision to make Steve Nash the oldest point guard ever to play in the NBA All-Star game. "Clearly, we gave him a lifetime achievement award"  (azcentral.com) (23)


Thu February 09, 2012
(io9) Sappy Real life "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs." Everybody, AWWWWWWWWWW  (io9.com) (5)
(ESPN) Cool Duke sucks the life out of Carolina  (sports.espn.go.com) (49)
(Some Guy) Asinine Angry dad de-lifes couple for defriending his daughter on Facebook  (charlotte.cbslocal.com) (145)


Wed February 08, 2012
(NBC San Diego) Dumbass Sports-talk host refers to ex-WNBA player as a 'beast', 'monster' and 'sasquatch of a woman. "I cannot confirm for you that she has been a woman her entire life." Unemploymentarity ensues  (nbcsandiego.com) (56)
(Haaretz) Dumbass 1-2-3-4-5? That's the stupidest combination I've ever heard of in my life That's the kinda thing an idiot would have on his luggage  (haaretz.com) (50)


Mon February 06, 2012
(Entertainment Weekly) Cool "How Star Wars changed my life, altered my view of good and evil, and ensured I'd be a virgin until 30"  (popwatch.ew.com) (66)


Thu February 02, 2012
(Break) Sappy Another one of those touching Thai life insurance commercials. What a drag  (break.com) (42)
(Some Guy) Interesting Teen boy who had sex with his 36-year-old fitness trainer tells a judge his life is ruined because girls in his class want to date him because he's experienced and boys come to him for sexual advice  (thespectrum.com) (204)
(Daily Mail) Hero Dad hangs on to his son who was clinging for his dear life after slipping from a chairlift, finally dropping him 25ft to rescuers below  (dailymail.co.uk) (119)


Tue January 31, 2012
(io9) Interesting Scientist has either figured out the answer to life, the universe, and everything or is batshiat insane. No one knows for sure yet  (io9.com) (79)
(Stuff.co.nz) Strange Why not spice up your stale sex life with some hot threesomes between you, your husband and your 15 year old cousin? Apart from the court case and the awkward family dinners of course  (stuff.co.nz) (70)


Mon January 30, 2012
(Some Guy) Sad Another Club Med closes, narrowing the list of vacation destinations for balding, hairy-backed men hoping to get invited to a swinger party as they wander about the beach sucking down pina coladas while in the full throes of a mid-life crisis  (couriermail.com.au) (42)
(BBC) Followup CEO of government-owned bank decides he doesn't need that £963,000 bonus after all, would rather not go through life with everyone in the country hating his guts  (bbc.co.uk) (40)
(TechEBlog) Amusing Yeah, that COULD be the coolest Diablo costume ever... Or it could doom the wearer to a lifetime of virginity  (techeblog.com) (37)
(Daily Mail) Interesting 88-year-old former Marine reveals his life as a Hollywood rentboy. Nailed Katharine Hepburn and had orgies with every celeb of the 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's. Semper Fi bro, you're now my hero times two  (dailymail.co.uk) (109)


Sun January 29, 2012
(Science Daily) Interesting Life found on dead hydrothermal vents. Which makes them not so dead, Mr. Science-Pants  (sciencedaily.com) (22)


Sat January 28, 2012
(Fark) Survey Subby is in the midst of his 5th distinct career change at age 36. Some have been more successful than others, but the journey overall has made for a pretty interesting life so far. Let's hear your career change stories  (fark.com) (221)


Fri January 27, 2012
(Mental Floss) Interesting Finally, one of life's mysteries solved. Now someone tell me why fancy ketchup is so damn fancy  (mentalfloss.com) (43)
(Science Daily) Obvious Radical new theory explains the origin, evolution, and nature of life. Apparently devolved through repeated multiplication of six times nine  (sciencedaily.com) (68)
(Mirror.co.uk) Interesting Rare color photos show Hitler's hidden life of luxury in Berlin and Bavaria. Wait until Hitler hears about this  (mirror.co.uk) (52)
(Mental Floss) Interesting From a 16-year-old chicken to a 255-year-old tortoise, these pets lived way longer than most  (mentalfloss.com) (29)


Thu January 26, 2012
(ABC) Dumbass Now THIS is how you troll: NC death row inmate writes letter to his hometown paper describing his "life of leisure" in prison and closing with the line "Kill me if you can suckers. Ha Ha "  (abcnews.go.com) (142)
(USA Today) Hero There comes a point in every man's life where he must finally take a stand against repressive attacks on his liberty. For this man, that happened on United flight 1287  (travel.usatoday.com) (136)
(I Heart Chaos) Sad Blizzard cancels this year's Blizzcon, taking away the only bit of joy Jay Mohr has left in his life  (iheartchaos.com) (108)
(Yahoo) Followup Military says "Operation Octave Fusion" was necessary because the American hostage had a "life-threatening condition". "Octave Fusion"? Is the guy who names new Gatorade flavors now moonlighting at the Pentagon?  (news.yahoo.com) (74)
(Yahoo) Amusing Birdman is going to place a bigger bet on the Super Bowl than you'll make in your life. Leaves subby stuntin' like his daddy  (sports.yahoo.com) (40)


Wed January 25, 2012
(Mental Floss) Cool 26 life-sized versions of popular board games. Bonus: The pieces are really hard to lose  (mentalfloss.com) (49)


Tue January 24, 2012
(WWSB ABC 7) Florida Adorable girl honored for saving her mother's life, albeit a little unconventionally....."I called 911, but first I slapped her with a piece of pizza"  (mysuncoast.com) (35)
(The Sun) Obvious Real-life 40-year-old virgin, a theatre manager who has never even kissed a man and vows to remain pure until she marries. With bonus "she'll take that hymen to the grave" pic  (thesun.co.uk) (368)
(Think Progress) Asinine Santorum says that pregnant rape victims should realize that they have "a gift in a very broken way, the gift of human life, and accept what God has given to you"  (thinkprogress.org) (454)


Mon January 23, 2012
(MSNBC) Interesting Scientists ask the dangerous question, "What if intelligent life had developed on Earth...and the apes had actually taken over?"  (msnbc.msn.com) (116)
(Yahoo) Interesting Russian scientist claims signs of life spotted on Venus. Wal-Mart immediately plans opening of store #8403  (news.yahoo.com) (51)


Sun January 22, 2012
(Some Guy) Weird Scared, naked, and sitting on a toilet bowl for 902 days in a row in no way to go through life  (yourhealth.com.sg) (98)
(Bloomberg) Amusing Jeb Bush, who seemed ready to jump aboard the S.S. Romney for weeks, is now donning a life vest ready for a swim in Newt-infested waters  (bloomberg.com) (81)


Sat January 21, 2012
(ABC) Obvious Study finds the more time you spend on Facebook, the more you think your life sucks. This contrasts nicely with Fark given the more time you spend here, the more you think boobies  (abcnews.go.com) (43)
(Fark) Survey Random Question of the Day: You've just been crowned Supreme Dictator-for-Life of the Entire World. What is your first official act, your Excellency?  (fark.com) (474)


Fri January 20, 2012
(Fox News) Asinine Cop's job description: traffic tickets ✔, bust dope smokers ✔, hassle brown people ✔, mace protestors ✔, more traffic tickets ✔, save 10-year-old boy's life ✖  (foxnews.com) (149)
(PhysOrg.com) Spiffy Regular exposure to alcohol doubles the lifespan of worms. Subby is gonna live FOREVER  (physorg.com) (19)
(ESPN) Interesting A look back at what may be the most infamous bad snap in NFL history, and at long-snapper Trey Junkin's life since  (sports.espn.go.com) (83)
(Daily Kos) Obvious Mitt Romney last night: How dare you say I'm pro-choice, I have an endorsement from a pro-life group. Mitt Romney ten years ago: How dare you say I have an endorsement from a pro-life group, I'm pro-choice  (dailykos.com) (158)
(Buzzfeed) Scary Beavis and Butt-head in real life are what nightmares are made of  (buzzfeed.com) (95)
(ABC) Ironic 1998:Newt Gingrich uses media in an attempt to oust Bill Clinton (D) from office for his affair with Monica Lewinsky. 2012: Newt Gingrich criticizes media for reporting on his love life. Especially that affair he had back in 1998  (abcnews.go.com) (208)


Thu January 19, 2012
(MSNBC) Sad 21yroldstudent: @GOD: Thank you for another year of life / God: @21yroldstudent: Come here and say that  (msnbc.msn.com) (161)
(Aggrogate) Strange Finally, a Half-Life 2 mod where you can ride an elevator while high  (aggrogate.com) (25)
(Some Guy) Asinine Costa Cruise Exec blasts survivors for 'sensationalism,' says they should have just tripped into a lifeboat like the captain and first officers  (news.sky.com) (103)


Wed January 18, 2012
(Fark) Scary I just saw that today is the 10th anniversary of the day I signed up for a Fark account (after lurking for a year or so). Come and tell me how much I suck and/or need to get a life. How many of you other 10+ year oldtimers are still around?  (fark.com) (607)
(Talking Points Memo) Followup Newt Gingrich adds yet another important woman to his life  (livewire.talkingpointsmemo.com) (69)
(Fark) Survey Today I realized that I've been pretty much an asshole my entire life, and I am ready to change. Any suggestions?  (fark.com) (393)
(YouTube) Sad Many have yet to realize that Youtube, in its current form, would cease to exist, if SOPA passes. Can you imagine life without Cricket; the world's most adorable kitten?  (youtube.com) (10)
(Telegraph) Followup Captain of stricken cruise ship says he "Tripped and fell into life boat" - Giglio  (telegraph.co.uk) (86)
(Politico) Ironic Web protests put SOPA on life support, much like Drew's liver  (politico.com) (90)


Tue January 17, 2012
(Mother Nature Network) Spiffy Vanilla Ice is a rapper, breakdancer, actor, amateur wrestler, motorcrosser, Juggalo, vegan, jet-skier, tattoo enthusiast, recovered heroin addict, loving father, "Surreal Life" housemate, and former love interest of Debbie Gibson  (mnn.com) (82)


Mon January 16, 2012
(BBC) Asinine Twenty top predictions for life 100 years from now - strange... no mention of anyone assuming control  (bbc.co.uk) (152)


Sat January 14, 2012
(Some Guy) Strange Wait a minute. You mean in real life terrorists really do attach cheap plastic alarm clocks to their bombs?  (asiaone.com) (58)


Fri January 13, 2012
(Some Guy) Spiffy Dog saves owner's life from abusive boyfriend. Battered women's shelter takes in both. Spiffy tag standing in because Hero tag has something in its eye  (lifewithdogs.tv) (160)


Thu January 12, 2012
(Superagent Leigh Steinberg) Sad The real-life sequel to Jerry Maguire is being played out in bankruptcy court and Alcoholics Anonymous  (thepostgame.com) (23)


Wed January 11, 2012
(InfoWorld) Obvious Doctor who is pissed he didn't get an iPhone or iPad for Christmas publishes article claiming TOUCHPAD DEVICES WILL CRIPPLE YOU FOR LIFE  (infoworld.com) (38)
(Daily Mail) Cool Mother-of-six saves her own life by coughing up a cancerous tumor, ham sandwich, half a chicken and assorted bon-bons  (dailymail.co.uk) (76)


Tue January 10, 2012
(Some Guy) Ironic In shocking news, a Ravens-Steelers game resulted in someone's life being saved  (blogs.baltimoreravens.com) (29)


Mon January 09, 2012
(MSNBC) Ironic Santorum on why Iran shouldn't have nukes: "They're a theocracy. They have deeply embedded beliefs that the afterlife is better than this life." Clearly, Santorum is jealous  (video.msnbc.msn.com) (186)
(YouTube) Weird Well.. I now know if you pour salt on frog legs, they come back to life. I wish I didn't know that  (youtube.com) (35)


Sun January 08, 2012
(NYPost) Interesting "My life as a live nude girl." Disappointingly safe for work  (nypost.com) (166)


Sat January 07, 2012
(Huffington Post) Interesting No matter which side you're on, your home life just became more difficult. And admissible in court  (huffingtonpost.com) (44)


Fri January 06, 2012
(io9) Interesting Habitable moons could be our best shot for discovering life on other worlds. Yes, it's a trap  (io9.com) (24)
(Washington City Paper) Unlikely "In my mind -- hell, in my own life -- what's happening isn't just the delayed onset of adulthood. It's the refusal of adulthood entirely. It's not failure to thrive. It's an awareness that thriving kind of blows"  (washingtoncitypaper.com) (352)
(Short List) Dumbass While it might be cute in a sitcom, accidentally handing over your gun to the cashier you're robbing isn't ideal in real life  (shortlist.com) (7)


Thu January 05, 2012
(TMZ) Strange Lisa Lampanelli to NBC: "I'm like Rosa Parks, don't sit me in the back of the bus." Somewhere in the afterlife, Greg Giraldo is choking on his drink  (tmz.com) (47)
(io9) Interesting Ha ha, look at those poor saps in 1900 try to predict life in the year 2000+, they had no idea that...wait, holy crap  (io9.com) (256)
(Washington Post) Sick Did you enjoy your lunch? Good. Let's talk about your grandma's sex life  (washingtonpost.com) (25)
(Life.com) Obvious "Drinking is a form of suicide where you're allowed to return to life and begin all over the next day. It's like killing yourself, and then you're reborn. I guess I've lived about ten or fifteen thousand lives now"  (life.com) (83)
(wmal.com) Amusing White people "can't do a damn thing to me or about me. Isn't that funny?" says DC's Mayor for Life Marion Barry. Ya know, the one who was caught smoking crack in the 90s and now they're making a movie about him  (wmal.com) (71)
(Some Guy) Sick You probably made some bad choices in life when police find your body on fire on the side of the road and have to release pictures of your tattoos to see if anyone can identify you  (wtkr.com) (28)


Sat December 31, 2011
(Daily Mail) Interesting The Doctor to marry woman who played the role of his daughter. Same woman also happens to be The Doctor's daughter in real life and already has a child with The Doctor. Surprisingly, none of this happened in Dixie  (dailymail.co.uk) (87)
(Protective People) PSA Police ponder public porn problem? Pfft, proliferation protests push puritanical principles. Protecting pre-pubescent progeny praiseworthy, providing poised policy pursued  (windsorstar.com) (44)
(Deseret News) Stupid FLDSers pledge to not have sex until their leader, serving a life sentence, is released from prison. Ok guys, we're gonna have to release Warren now, or else the loons will stop breeding  (deseretnews.com) (118)
(Daily Mail) Cool Adopted woman, 64, who spent whole life thinking she was an only child discovers she has nine fat, homely siblings living minutes away  (dailymail.co.uk) (37)
(SeattlePI) Interesting Although the idea sounds great on paper, in real life if you're a voice teacher you probably shouldn't encourage your female students to strip and touch themselves sexually to help improve their vocal range  (seattlepi.com) (78)


Fri December 30, 2011
(CNBC) Scary "IT systems have proliferated to create a system of systems that is now interacting in unpredictable ways that regulators and investors cannot comprehend, far less control"  (cnbc.com) (71)
(News Tribune) Spiffy The News Tribune (Tacoma, WA) says: "...sometimes individual stories on our website take on a life of their own and attract a much wider audience, especially when they are linked to by a big aggregator like FARK " (1st paragraph)  (blog.thenewstribune.com) (3)
(Washington Examiner) Obvious Romney's flip-flopping goes back nearly a decade, where he ran as a pro-choice candidate in Massachusetts because polling told him pro-lifers were out   (campaign2012.washingtonexaminer.com) (54)
(TechEBlog) Cool Incredible comic superhero weapons brought to life  (techeblog.com) (35)
(Yahoo) Followup Life imitates Fark headline  (news.yahoo.com) (17)


Thu December 29, 2011
(Telegraph) Amusing "LinkedIn is like going to a school reunion with the people you'd hoped to avoid all your life." Oh, c'mon, it's not THAT bad--OK, the author's got a point  (blogs.telegraph.co.uk) (40)
(Uproxx) Obvious I'm beginning to think that Zooey Deschanel and Joseph Gordon-Levitt have a real-life "500 Days of Summer" thing going on  (uproxx.com) (120)
(BBC) Cool Scientists capture remarkable images of life from one of the most inhospitable spots in the ocean  (bbc.co.uk) (13)


Tue December 27, 2011
(Huffington Post) Sad Middle eastern religious extremists bully, harass, and even spit on girls as young as 8 years old for immodest dress. Just another day in the life of Muslim funda...wait, what? Orthodox Jews?  (huffingtonpost.com) (317)
(Variety) Sad Hammer Films director Don Sharp dead at 90... until Christopher Lee brings him back to life  (variety.com) (8)
(Blue Ridge Now) Followup Nov 2nd: Drew's dad died 4 times. Last week: went 4 for 6 playing baseball with the friends who saved his life. Local newspaper writes a followup  (blueridgenow.com) (98)
(CNN) Hero America's elders, having led such productive lives and done so much to strengthen this country, would like to pass on their 6 most important tips for living as good a life as they did  (cnn.com) (79)
(Some Guy) Interesting Jared Leto is 40. I guess his so-called life is halfway finished  (hlntv.com) (40)


Sun December 25, 2011
(Some Guy) Photoshop Now that Kim Jong-Il is dead. Photoshop what life in North Korea might be like without Kim Jong-Il  (imageshack.us) (41)


Fri December 23, 2011
(The Consumerist) Sad In the worst tragedy on American soil since 9/11, vegetarian's life completely ruined because some stoned teenage windowlicker wouldn't make her a veggie sub. 10 years from now, we'll all remember where we were when we read this  (consumerist.com) (192)
(LiveLeak) Cool This video of a wildlife photographer's encounter with a troop of wild gorillas is incredible, amazing, and awesome  (liveleak.com) (73)


Thu December 22, 2011
(The Morning Call) Dumbass Man in custody after gas explosion threat, faces lifetime ban from Taco Bell  (mcall.com) (9)
(Iowa City Press-Citizen) PSA If you've recently gotten divorced, laid off, or experienced some other negative life-changing event, the best city to start your new life in is...Iowa City? Really?  (press-citizen.com) (52)


Wed December 21, 2011
(Yahoo) Spiffy "What Donald Trump would be if he led his life backward"  (finance.yahoo.com) (10)
(The New York Times) Interesting "This American Life" helps take down a Georgia drug court Judge  (nytimes.com) (277)
(The Sun) Amusing Kanye West felt like his life was threatened after a fan threw a business card at him on stage. "We risking our lives up here. You can't go throwing s*** that we gonna slip on"  (thesun.co.uk) (111)


Mon December 19, 2011
(Warming Glow) Spiffy Rob Lowe's epic Lifetime Movie trailer...EPIC   (warmingglow.uproxx.com) (67)
(io9) Obvious How a Battlestar Galactica addiction can ruin your life  (io9.com) (109)
(Mirror.co.uk) Followup In honor of Dear Leader's passing, here are 17 bizarre details about his life. "He's ronery, so ronery" strangely absent  (mirror.co.uk) (66)


Sat December 17, 2011
(Science Daily) Sad Should I have submitted this with a Futurama reference in the headline? Now I'll never know. And it will haunt me for the rest of my life. MY MANWICH  (sciencedaily.com) (32)
(Some Boy) Photoshop Photoshop this classic clumsy Boys Life cover  (trussel.com) (27)


Wed December 14, 2011
(Uproxx) Stupid Gwyneth Paltrow's life of insufferable white affluence -- there's an app for that  (uproxx.com) (116)
(Huffington Post) Interesting Alice Cooper discusses music, life, and the night that he almost murdered Elvis...wait, wait WHAT?  (huffingtonpost.com) (28)


Tue December 13, 2011
(Cincinnati Enquirer) Spiffy 100-year-old doctor still makes house calls. Attributes his long life to unfiltered cigarettes, regular leechings, and a thimbleful of apple vinegar everyday  (news.cincinnati.com) (56)


Mon December 12, 2011
(CNN) Scary Hacker who caused the National Emergency Alert System to send out a text telling NJ cell phone users to "seek shelter immediately" due to the "extreme threat to life" owes a few thousand people new underwear  (ireport.cnn.com) (176)


Sun December 11, 2011
(YouTube) Video Remember the times when life was so much simpler? Not safe for work language  (youtube.com) (23)


Sat December 10, 2011
(SFGate) Strange Russian opposition parties get robocalls chanting "Putin is life; Putin is the light; love Putin and your life will have meaning; Putin will give you happiness; Putin will open your eyes." Romney aides start taking notes furiously  (sfgate.com) (71)


Wed December 07, 2011
(Daily Mail) Sappy Two ugly-ass rabbits live life of luxury in a tricked-out £10,000 hutch (w/pics)  (dailymail.co.uk) (40)


Tue December 06, 2011
(Daily Stab) Dumbass Jesse James blames Sandra Bullock for ruining his life  (dailystab.com) (129)


Mon December 05, 2011
(Vanishing New York) Amusing Old-school NYC metalworking shop realizes second life after being sold to real-estate sharks back in 2008, stays standing as pop-up holiday gift boutique selling monocles and artisanal yurts  (vanishingnewyork.blogspot.com) (15)
(Washington Post) Sad Sad: Starring in a movie and not remembering it. Sadder: Not seeing it until over 30 years after it was in theaters. Saddest: Your life was the exact opposite of the movie title. I guess it wasn't such A Wonderful Life after all  (washingtonpost.com) (141)
(The New York Times) Silly Turtle escapes NYC wildlife center, beats Giants secondary for a 39-yard gain  (nytimes.com) (17)
(Daily Mail) Dumbass Some ex-wives are happy for your new dating life. Others, pour boiling water on you while you sleep and then pummel you with a baseball bat  (dailymail.co.uk) (93)


Sun December 04, 2011
(Herald Tribune) Florida Smoking crack, passing counterfeit money, smacking up juvies, spitting on arrestees, cracking heads open -- just another day in the life of corrupt untouchable cops in the great state of Florida  (heraldtribune.com) (148)


Fri December 02, 2011
(USA Today) Obvious Mitt Romney calls Newt Gingrich a 'life-long politician'. In other news, Romney continues to be a lifelong presidential candidate  (content.usatoday.com) (13)


Thu December 01, 2011
(The Atlantic Wire) Followup Apple apologizes for Siri's pro-life bias and promises that next version with work with coat-hanger attachment  (theatlanticwire.com) (95)


Tue November 29, 2011
(Some Guy) Unlikely You know in the cartoons when an animal makes a perfect silouette running through a door? Yeah. Not so much in real life. So here's a deer running through a car wash. Your argument is invalid  (ulocal.wmur.com) (19)
(Discover) Interesting The lifespan of every mammal is 1.5 billion heartbeats, more or less  (blogs.discovermagazine.com) (58)
(My Fox DC) Fail When donating clothes to the needy, always remember to take your life-savings out of the pockets first  (myfoxdc.com) (26)
(Guardian) Amusing Marmite: Love it or hate it... or be inconvenienced by its life-threatening tendencies  (guardian.co.uk) (33)
(The Smoking Gun) Silly When life hands you lemons, squeeze them into some vodka and have some fun with this week's Mugshot Roundup  (thesmokinggun.com) (81)


Mon November 28, 2011
(YouTube) Amusing Not news: Nutjob discovers the proliferation of occult symbolism from Masons, the Illuminati and secret societies. News: In a major Hollywood movie. Fark: Despicable Me  (youtube.com) (52)


Sat November 26, 2011
(National Geographic) Strange Wildfires, disappearing oxygen helped kill off 90 percent of all life on Earth. Way to go, wildfires and disappearing oxygen  (news.nationalgeographic.com) (38)


Fri November 25, 2011
(Paste Magazine) Interesting A day in the life of a random assortment of letters  (pastemagazine.com) (18)
(Daily Mail) Fail Naked and hanging from a balcony is no way to go through life son, errrrr m'am  (dailymail.co.uk) (53)


Thu November 24, 2011
(UPI) Silly Family decides to spare life of oyster they found because it had shapes on its shell arranged to look like a human face. Article does not say if it also resembled a bearded clam  (upi.com) (34)
(Washington Post) Unlikely Comic book fandom is stunned after previously-dead character is returned to life  (washingtonpost.com) (79)
(Komo) Dumbass Four-year-old arrested and banned for life from Safeway for theft .... Oh wait, I mean the dumbass security guard got fired for being a dumbass  (komonews.com) (158)


Wed November 23, 2011
(YouTube) Video Gorgeous Skyrim timelapse video confirms that Skyrim is more beautiful than real life  (youtube.com) (336)
(Oregon Live) Hero Oregon governor imposes moratorium on death penalty for remainder of his term. Still no cure for spending life in Oregon  (oregonlive.com) (168)


Mon November 21, 2011
(The Consumerist) Dumbass If you've ever waited tables in your life, this will make your blood boil  (consumerist.com) (432)
(Some Fan) Hero Article: CPR saves player's life - 4 times. Fark: it was Drew's dad  (blueridgenow.com) (174)
(dump.com) Video Coolest timelapse of 24 hours of dorm life in four minutes. Yup ... the roomers are flying  (dump.com) (38)


Sun November 20, 2011
(ESPN) Interesting How badly will the Cowboys beat the Sexy Rexys? Will the Eagles provide a third Miracle at the MetLifeLands? Can the Bengals take second place in the AFC North? It's the NFL Week 11 thread (games start at 1 PM ET on CBS and Fox)  (scores.espn.go.com) (3113)


Sat November 19, 2011
(YouTube) Amusing From MST3K season two, it's the classic Godzilla VS Megalon featuring Jet Jaguar and Rex Dart: Eskimo Spy. Watch as Joel, Servo, and Crow suffer through this low moment in Godzilla's life. "That's not my tail"  (youtube.com) (27)


Thu November 17, 2011
(Boston Globe) Sad After two years of living the good life, New England's squirrels are starving on account of the smallest acorn crop in memory  (bostonglobe.com) (37)


Wed November 16, 2011
(USA Today) Followup Paterno entitled to a $500,000/yr pension for the rest of his life, but before you get all outraged, that means Penn State is only likely to be out a couple of Mil, max  (usatoday.com) (128)
(G4TV) Cool Valve wants users of Hat Fortress 2 to make holiday hats, presumably so they can keep their team busy delaying Half-Life 3  (g4tv.com) (55)
(Starpulse) Obvious God turns Danny Trejo's life around after prison chat. Danny Trejo returns the favor by starring in "The Muppets" and "A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas"  (starpulse.com) (43)
(Mirror.co.uk) Unlikely Alien craft crashes in woman's yard. Does she: a) call authorities, b) alert the media, or c) keep the alien's lifeless body in her fridge for two years?  (mirror.co.uk) (136)


Tue November 15, 2011
(ESPN) Cool Packer season tickets: In high demand, hard to get your hands on, and they might just save your life  (espn.go.com) (45)


Mon November 14, 2011
(The Hill) Fail From the party that gave us the Star Wars defense system: "Furthermore, in the movie 'G.I. Jane,' Demi Moore was waterboarded, and if it worked in a Hollywood movie, it HAS to work in real life"  (thehill.com) (236)
(Huffington Post) Obvious Noted liberal mouthpiece Sen. Tom Coburn: "From tax write-offs for gambling losses, vacation homes, and luxury yachts to subsidies for their ranches and estates, the government is subsidizing the lifestyles of the rich and famous"  (huffingtonpost.com) (127)
(Time) Interesting Maybe the reason scientists haven't found life in space is because they aren't looking at the right cities in space  (time.com) (42)
(Short List) Cool If buying a Porsche is a sign of a mid-life crisis, then Brad Pitt's got issues  (shortlist.com) (27)
(Daily Mail) Strange Debbie Harry takes knife, disembowels naked life-sized model of herself on stage. No one really knows why. In other news, you'd still hit that at age 66  (dailymail.co.uk) (62)


Sun November 13, 2011
(Houston Press) Sad RIP blues legend Doyle Bramhall, the man who wrote Stevie Ray Vaughan's hits "Life By The Drop" and "Dirty Pool." Little known fact, he also taught Stevie to sing  (blogs.houstonpress.com) (30)
(Frontline) Video Female reporter risks her life to report on conditions inside the uprising in Syria. The revolution will be televised  (pbs.org) (28)
(Salon) Interesting The controversy over free will. Look, there are those who think that life has nothing left to chance. A host of holy horrors to direct our aimless dance. I will choose a path that's clear, I will choose freewill  (salon.com) (280)


Sat November 12, 2011
(TwinCities.com) Interesting "I'm sorry, Sir, but you can't get that line of credit to save your dear mother's life." "Why not?" "You didn't pay your parking tickets, Sir"  (twincities.com) (61)


Fri November 11, 2011
(The Hill) Asinine Because destroying the Gulf of Mexico wasn't good enough, let's open up unrestricted drilling in the Arctic Wildlife Refuge  (thehill.com) (152)


Thu November 10, 2011
(CBS News) Cool In the shock of a lifetime, Taylor Swift narrowly beats out Kanye West to win Entertainer of the Year honors at the Country Music Association Awards  (cbsnews.com) (67)
(NME) Hero Queen: "We've endured because we speak for common people." That, and Brian May saved the life of a brain-damaged hedgehog  (nme.com) (69)
(Some Guy) Weird No matter how bad you think your life is, just be glad you don't suffer from tooth worms  (health.asiaone.com) (61)


Wed November 09, 2011
(Mirror.co.uk) Fail Westlife fan chooses boyband over her husband  (mirror.co.uk) (28)


Tue November 08, 2011
(YouTube) Cool Impressive Chinese fry cooks come from all woks of life (wait for 1:02)  (youtube.com) (36)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida University of South Florida pays $10,000 for a lifesize Darth Vader statue and Captain Kirk's chair, in order to "encourage inspiration beyond conventional thought"  (tampabay.com) (30)


Mon November 07, 2011
(truTV) Interesting 14 Myths about America you've been falling for most of your life  (trutv.com) (455)
(NPR) Interesting A leering toothless guy alongside a toddler sitting on a bartop in a Montana saloon may not be the most iconic image from LIFE magazine, but it was among the first  (npr.org) (65)


Sun November 06, 2011
(Some Guy) Cool Robbed a train full of money, became a national hero, spent the best years of his life in Brazil as a free man, and received a lifetime achievement award for his services to crime - everyman's idol  (zumaworld.blogspot.com) (42)


Sat November 05, 2011
(Huffington Post) Scary The secret life of gays  (huffingtonpost.com) (192)
(TechEBlog) Cool Top 3 coolest video game weapons brought to life  (techeblog.com) (77)


Wed November 02, 2011
(Some Guy) Amusing Poop transplant could save Arizona man's life...as if he doesn't get enough shiat from his wife  (blogs.phoenixnewtimes.com) (62)
(Some Guy) Amusing Patent troll now getting to try life as a real troll by living under a bridge  (vegasinc.com) (40)
(Washington Post) Interesting America's Most Wanted to return to TV December 2nd on Lifetime, will now focus only on deadbeat dads, adulterers, wifebeaters, stalkers, and women who are oppressed by them  (washingtonpost.com) (30)


Tue November 01, 2011
(BBC) Interesting Glowing brain tumour trial begins. Prosecutors vow to remove this cancer, and will ask for life  (bbc.co.uk) (25)


Mon October 31, 2011
(Short List) Hero Brave man gets legal permission to kill the squirrel who has wrecked his life  (shortlist.com) (108)


Fri October 28, 2011
(MSNBC) Spiffy Sparks of electricity bring the dead back to life  (msnbc.msn.com) (57)
(Mediabistro) Followup A band of Marine brothers storm Reddit to voice their anger at the life-threatening injury inflicted by Oakland police on their brother, 24-year-old Iraqi war veteran Scott Olsen  (mediabistro.com) (919)
(Some Guy) Dumbass Using a stolen credit card to send money to your jailed boyfriend is a great way to be reunited. (w/ 'You've never been that drunk in your life' mugshot)  (5newsonline.com) (122)
(BusinessWeek) Spiffy MetLife posts 10-fold third quarter profit. New CEO told to handle acclaim  (businessweek.com) (19)
(CNN) Followup Man who killed 4 relatives on Thanksgiving to spend the rest of his life getting stuffed  (cnn.com) (38)


Thu October 27, 2011
(Stuff.co.nz) Sad If the father of your unborn child crashes into a liquor store while trying to evade police, and runs off leaving you stuck in the car - you may have made some bad life choices  (stuff.co.nz) (29)


Tue October 25, 2011
(Celebslam) Interesting Leonardo Dicaprio dating Romanian model Madalina Diana Ghenea. I don't know what he sees in her. She's barely one of the most attractive women I've seen in my entire life  (celebslam.celebuzz.com) (125)


Mon October 24, 2011
(Some Guy) Sad Social worker who risked his life trying to save three developmentally disabled adults from the Joplin tornado is denied workers' comp and must pay at least $2.5 million in medical fees. "Heroism doesn't pay the bills"  (syracuse.com) (150)


Sun October 23, 2011
(KHOU Houston) Hero Two-year old calls grandma on cell phone to save diabetic mother's life  (khou.com) (71)
(Some Guy) Dumbass As a married high school resource officer studying to be a minister and Army chaplain, wearing your uniform in a hotel room with a 17 year old prostitute is no way to live your life, son  (wistv.com) (59)
(Some Guy) Cool Study pushes origin of land life back from 6000 to 6027 years ago  (vancouversun.com) (35)


Sat October 22, 2011
(MSNBC) Asinine Republicans and Democrats agree - free lifelong health care for injured veterans is too expensive and has to go. Free lifetime health care for Congress is still okay, though  (msnbc.msn.com) (210)
(USA Today) Sad Irish boy band Westlife to split after successful 14-year career singing sugary pop songs, impersonating boys  (usatoday.com) (19)


Fri October 21, 2011
(The New York Times) Obvious GE brings good things to life and Obama's policies bring good profits to GE  (nytimes.com) (42)
(Washington Post) Amusing Real-life super hero movement growing. Come for the Michigan Batman, stay for the Michigan Batman. Michigan. Batman  (washingtonpost.com) (79)


Thu October 20, 2011
(ABC) Sick Bernie Maddoff writes letter to his dead son's daughter-in-law from jail, tells her he is doing the time of his life and informs her about "great new investment possiblity"  (abcnews.go.com) (114)
(Some Guy) Interesting The story of an 80s one-hit wonder. "My friend told me, 'You're going to Syracuse in 24 hours.' That saved my life"  (songfacts.com) (47)
(CNN) Interesting It appears a simple chin lift could have saved Michael Jackson's life. Is there anything plastic surgery can't do?  (cnn.com) (34)


Wed October 19, 2011
(Some Guy) Interesting Tonight on PBS, how the radioactive exclusion zone around Chernobyl has become a de-facto wildlife preserve  (pbs.org) (51)
(Gothamist) Sad ATTENTION FARK KNITTERS: A bunch of penguins in New Zealand urgently need you to knit them tiny little sweaters. Their life pretty much depends on it. Please help  (gothamist.com) (156)
(kfor) Dumbass Naked, covered in cooking oil, and making indecent proposals towards young girls is no way to go in life young man  (kfor.com) (30)


Tue October 18, 2011
(Fark) FarkBlog Zombie injuries not life threatening, seamen leaving ferries in Greek ports, and an explanation of Herman Cain's pro-llama agenda: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 10/9 - 10/15  (fark.com) (4)


Mon October 17, 2011
(Fox News) Interesting Hugo Chavez's quest to become President for Life may be coming to fruition  (foxnews.com) (67)
(Fox News) Interesting Mississippi is about to vote on its "personhood initiative," which will enshrine in its constitution the idea that life begins at fertilization  (foxnews.com) (430)


Sun October 16, 2011
(People Magazine) Sappy Christina Hendricks on life with her husband: "We take turns being the chef and sous chef." This has to be a euphemism for something, but I don't know what  (people.com) (76)
(USA Today) News 15-car pileup at Indy season finale in Las Vegas claims life of Dan Wheldon  (usatoday.com) (271)
(Orlando Sentinel) Florida Kids are remorseless sociopathic bastards who won't hesitate to destroy your life in order to get some attention  (orlandosentinel.com) (147)
(BBC) Cool Released after 26 years for a murder he did not commit, man turns to life of violence  (bbc.co.uk) (26)


Fri October 14, 2011
(Some Guy) Dumbass Meth-addled, naked, trying to eat grass and dig a hole in the ground while in the fetal position and wearing Mr. Grinch underwear is no way to go through life, son  (koco.com) (27)
(NJ.com) Obvious Drunk, wearing only boots and sprawled unconscious on your neighbor's lawn? Actually, now that you mention it, that does sound like an excellent way to go through life  (nj.com) (14)

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