| Source | Fark Headline | Comments | |
| Jury awards drunken stripper $100,000 after car wreck (blog.al.com) | (199) | ||
| (Some Guy) | Punxsutawney Phil sees his shadow. Sorry folks, there'll be six more weeks of winter (post-gazette.com) | (255) | |
| Punxsutawney Phil sees his shadow. Sorry folks, there'll be six more weeks of winter (pennlive.com) | (98) |
| (Watertown Daily Times) | New York sewage company to begin treating local water supply to remove mercury released by mining operations. Subby's sure he read something like this in an Hg Wells short story years ago (watertowndailytimes.com) | (127) |
| (Some Guy) | Kentucky city opens to public a government employee salary database. You'd be surprised how much a Chicken Inseminator II makes (govtech.com) | (82) |