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Headlines matching 'Ida'
Sat February 11, 2012
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Some Retiree) Florida The most amazing photos of a 'cloud tsunami' hitting Florida condos you'll see until you get old and move there  (travel.aol.co.uk) (34)
(Arizona Star) Interesting Republican endorses Gabrielle Giffords' aide to fill her seat in Special Election, suggests the other Republicans drop their candidacies  (azstarnet.com) (67)


Fri February 10, 2012
(Fark) FarkParty NorCal Vegas Liver Warm-Up party: Friday, Feb 24th, location TBD. Drew will be there  (fark.com) (25)


Thu February 09, 2012
(CNN) Followup Arizona court forces potential candidate off of city council ballot because her English isn't good enough, setting a dangerous precedent that may leave the entirety of the south ungoverned  (news.blogs.cnn.com) (412)
(Jacksonville.com) Florida One legged cocaine dealer runs away from police by hopping. Really, Florida? I mean, really?  (jacksonville.com) (36)


Wed February 08, 2012
(Local10) Florida Man returns to house to find squatters with drugs, grenades, and since this is Florida and not New York, a pig  (local10.com) (35)
(First Coast News) Dumbass Another Florida college is making headlines for hazing, and this time it's a fraternity at the University of Florida that's in the hot seat  (firstcoastnews.com) (87)
(Some Guy) Interesting Former Republican candidate Gary Johnson says "FARK YEAH" when referring to the 9th's gay marriage decision. In other news, he is still running for President under the (L) label  (garyjohnson2012.com) (129)
(Some Guy) Sick If you ever wanted the pleasure of having the measles AND you were at the Super Bowl village last Friday, I have some good news for you  (fox59.com) (58)


Mon February 06, 2012
(Huffington Post) Dumbass GOP candidate uses Asian stereotypes to attack opponent. Well there's a supplies  (huffingtonpost.com) (173)
(Sun Sentinel) Florida Man busted for mooning on trolley. King Friday the XIII frowns upon these shenanigans   (weblogs.sun-sentinel.com) (28)


Sat February 04, 2012
(Washington Post) Florida Republican National Committee explains why this year's race has turned so ugly: Blame Florida  (washingtonpost.com) (68)
(Yahoo) Dumbass New debate coach turns around the Florida election and saves the Romney campaign. Romney being Romney, you can guess what happens next  (news.yahoo.com) (145)
(hampton roads) Spiffy Hampton Roads (Virginia) thinks that their recent odd news deserves a dedicated FARK icon, just like Florida (10th paragraph)  (hamptonroads.com) (5)


Fri February 03, 2012
(Huffington Post) Stupid Since they don't get enough attention in this country, Arizona lawmaker proposes a holiday to celebrate white people  (huffingtonpost.com) (325)
(CBS News) Asinine Newt Gingrich: Now that I lost Florida, shouldn't we change the rules?  (cbsnews.com) (354)


Thu February 02, 2012
(Washington Post) Amusing Retired Supreme Court Justice O'Connor on the two leading Republican candidates, "one is a practicing polygamist, and he's not even the Mormon." Please deposit "Oh Snap" images to the right  (washingtonpost.com) (68)
(NW Florida Daily News) Spiffy Ugly ass baby gorilla born in Florida zoo  (nwfdailynews.com) (14)
(Some Rustled Cattle) Florida Florida's new red light cameras are catching video of interesting things besides red light runners. Like cattle rustlers. With video  (wtsp.com) (48)
(Talking Points Memo) Followup Mitt Romney may have won in Florida...but he also lost a few things. Florida truly giveth and taketh away  (tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com) (28)
(ABC) Amusing So what happens if two "unelectable" candidates, Obama and Romney, square off in the 2012 presidential election? Oh, dear god, the Mayans were right weren't they?  (abcnews.go.com) (80)


Wed February 01, 2012
(The Daily Beast) Dumbass The FBI likes to intimidate suspects by using a chainsaw to go through apartment doors, a technique that's especially intimidating when they saw through the wrong door  (thedailybeast.com) (208)
(MSNBC) Scary I'm not a doctor, but I think you died after inhaling carbon monoxide at a Holiday Inn Express last night  (msnbc.msn.com) (53)
(Politico) Amusing Santorum logic: Since Newt didn't beat Romney in Florida, I'm the only candidate that can beat Romney  (politico.com) (49)
(Yahoo) Interesting Women abandon Newt for a younger and prettier candidate  (news.yahoo.com) (37)
(Talking Points Memo) Dumbass Mitt Romney follows up his decisive Florida primary win with another shot to the foot: I'm not concerned about the very poor...that's what the Democratic party is for  (livewire.talkingpointsmemo.com) (291)
(Atlanta Journal Constitution) Obvious Despite rout in Florida, Gingrich vows to troll Romney all the way to the convention  (ajc.com) (123)
(Talking Points Memo) Obvious Newt refuses to call Romney to congratulate him on his decisive Florida win  (livewire.talkingpointsmemo.com) (65)


Tue January 31, 2012
(MSNBC) Florida Will Nice Hair pull out a big win? Will Angry Womanizer make it a race? Will anyone care how Old Anarchist or Jesus Loves Me fare? It's your Florida Republican Primary live results thread  (elections.msnbc.msn.com) (405)
(Miami New Times) Florida "Newt Gingrish look like a hackler. He looks like he get on people's nerves just for the fark of it,'" and more insight on the Florida GOP primary from Miami strippers Skrawberry and Tip Drill  (blogs.miaminewtimes.com) (71)
(CNN) Unlikely Why Boise State has problems recruiting blue chip players. Word "Idaho" strangely absent  (sportsillustrated.cnn.com) (59)


Mon January 30, 2012
(Spiegel) Spiffy An elephant in Amsterdam's zoo has made history after vets fit her with jumbo-sized contact lens. Win Thida sees what you did there  (spiegel.de) (18)
(Beatcalls) Florida You have a fight with your pregnant girlfriend - do you a) take the blame even if it's not your fault. b) walk away and come back when things cool down. c) rip off all of her clothes and leave her naked in the street. HINT: Florida Tag  (beatcalls.com) (64)
(Yahoo) Obvious It looked like Obama's re-election campaign was sailing against some stiff political winds, but then hot air masses in Iowa, New Hampshire, South Carolina and Florida dramatically changed the climate  (news.yahoo.com) (71)
(SFGate) Interesting Newt Gingrich says his war chest is down to $600,000 for the upcoming Florida Primary, tells Callista to cancel scheduled campaign appearance at Tiffany's  (sfgate.com) (33)
(Boston.com) Obvious Romney credits change in tactics for Florida surge. And by "tactics" he means "all negative, all the time, flood the airwaves, take no prisoners, outspend everyone by a margin of 7 to 1"  (boston.com) (71)


Sun January 29, 2012
(Yahoo) Asinine Candidate who was barred from running because she doesn't speak English proficiently vows appeal. At least that's what they think she said, not really sure  (news.yahoo.com) (227)
(Herald Tribune) Florida 55-year-old Florida man claiming Indian descent wears war paint, headdresses, and performs sacred dance ceremonies at heritage festivals across the state. Some Native Americans have a problem with this (w/ pic of alleged Indian)  (heraldtribune.com) (164)


Sat January 28, 2012
(Huffington Post) Amusing A Republican member of the Indiana General Assembly withdrew his bill to create a pilot program for drug testing welfare applicants Friday after one of his Democratic colleagues amended the measure to require drug testing for lawmakers  (huffingtonpost.com) (110)
(WPTV.com) Florida Tired of the Boogie Nights, Burt Reynolds slashes price of his Florida home 45% in desperate attempt to avoid Deliverance of foreclosure. It's still twice the market price, though, so he'd have to make out like a bandit  (wptv.com) (37)


Fri January 27, 2012
(Huffington Post) Interesting "Even if the odds that Gingrich as GOP presidential candidate would win the general election are 10 percent, that's too much of a risk to the nation. No responsible American should accept a 10 percent risk of a President Gingrich"  (huffingtonpost.com) (255)
(Fark) Survey Clear your desks, everybody. It's Friday, time for the Fark Weird News Quiz  (fark.com) (53)
(The Register) Spiffy Nobel winners invent new way to distill alcohol. Science: it works, female members of the family Canidae  (theregister.co.uk) (12)
(Yahoo) Obvious Meanwhile, in Florida, Romney's lying about Obama's foreign policy record, Santorum is lying about the record of Romneycare in MA, and Newt Gingrich is lying about the record of .. Newt Gingrich  (news.yahoo.com) (58)
(BusinessWeek) Interesting Romney's candidacy is shining a spotlight on the otherwise secretive private equity industry, and the cockroaches are starting to scramble  (businessweek.com) (67)
(CNN) Hero Woman orgasms during MRI... here are the nuclear launch validation codes, and the coordinates for multiple targets, have at it  (thechart.blogs.cnn.com) (75)


Thu January 26, 2012
(CNN) Florida Will Romney take it to Gingrich? Will Newt out-Reagan everyone? What's Santorum still doing up there? Something something RON PAUL? It's the final Florida GOP debate.(8pm on CNN)  (cnn.com) (1692)
(Some Guy) Florida Millions of homes in Florida and this guy had to pick a police officer's to break into. Hilarity ensues. (With "Ow,ow,ow" mugshot goodness)  (news4jax.com) (21)
(TBO) Florida Breaking down Florida's GOP support by region. Jacksonville: Romney. Miami: Gingrich. Naples: Santorum. Tampa Bay: RON PAUL  (www2.tbo.com) (18)
(Townhall) Hero Gingrich has declared war on the anti-Republican media pro-liberal bias and double standard that give Democrat candidates a built in 8- to 10-point advantage. It's about time. We've got a country to save  (townhall.com) (202)
(Fox News) Fail "The selection of a Republican candidate for the presidency of this globalized and expansive empire is the greatest competition of idiocy and ignorance that has ever been." This is obviously false because Fidel Castro said it  (nation.foxnews.com) (70)
(The Daily Beast) Followup This just in: Nice Hair is back in the lead over Angry Womanizer in Florida. As usual, Old Anarchist and Jesus Loves Me still in it for the free publicity  (thedailybeast.com) (53)
(NPR) Stupid Substantive policy driven interview with Ron Paul. Well, the first half anyway, the rest is about the probable, not very likely, but not ruled out, 3rd party candidacy, that may or may not be under consideration that is off the table  (npr.org) (24)


Wed January 25, 2012
(Huffington Post) Strange Did we mention that Mormons like to baptize dead Jews in order to "save" them? That shouldn't be a problem in Florida, should it?  (huffingtonpost.com) (334)
(Boston.com) Interesting Florida retirees confused by how to fix Social Security, along with the Google, rock music, and their VCRs  (boston.com) (72)
(Red State) Sad Difference between the 2008 and 2012 primaries? In 2008, Democrats fight over two highly electable candidates. In 2012, Republicans fight over two highly flawed candidates and neither side thinks the other can win  (redstate.com) (71)
(Wired) Followup January 25th, 1945: the US begins water fluoridation. Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous Communist plot we have ever had to face?  (wired.com) (106)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida Florida city votes to put fluoride back in the water. Apparently they never googled tooth and plaque conspiracy. And Metallica  (tampabay.com) (45)


Tue January 24, 2012
(New York Daily News) Dumbass "'Sometimes if your candidate loses ... you kind of get your panties in a wad and you may say things that you regret later,' Palin said Monday - without any hint of irony - on the Fox Business Network"  (nydailynews.com) (46)


Mon January 23, 2012
(Reuters) Interesting South Korean Presidential candidate declares he is able to cure cancer by staring into people's eyes, moves ahead of Romney in the Republican primary polls  (reuters.com) (34)
(RealClearPolitics) Florida Romney campaign soils its magic underwear after new polls show Gingrich leading by 9 points in Florida  (realclearpolitics.com) (85)
(Herald Tribune) Florida Why does first-term (R) Rep. Ben Albritton, a citrus grower from Wauchula and recent chairman of the Florida Citrus Commission hate photography?  (heraldtribune.com) (59)


Sun January 22, 2012
(The Daily Beast) Amusing Newt's epic crushing of Mitt Romney, the Republican establishment's anointed candidate, has thrown the normally well-oiled GOP into a full-blown, pant-shiatting panic  (thedailybeast.com) (272)


Fri January 20, 2012
(Yahoo) Florida Florida cinches 3 out of 5 top slots for the America's Most Stressful Cities, 2012 FTA - "Standout factor: Tampa is in the 97th percentile for suicides"  (realestate.yahoo.com) (122)
(American Thinker) Sad Until the media stops obsessing over the infidelities of the GOP candidates and starts doing its job, Barack Obama's chances of a second term continue to scare the living daylights out of those who understand its implications  (americanthinker.com) (200)
(Hot Air) Obvious I just want to thank ABC.. all the networks and cable TV in fact, for helping me validate my conclusion that they are mostly Obama's servile, complacent, undistinguished media (SCUM)  (hotair.com) (105)
(Gothamist) Hero Samuel L. Jackson has had it with these money-grubbing superPACs messing with our Monday to Friday elections  (gothamist.com) (18)


Thu January 19, 2012
(Fox News) Obvious If the GOP candidates play their cards right, then every time Obama comes out with a commercial like this then all they have to do is counter it with the evidence  (foxnews.com) (111)
(BusinessWeek) Interesting Mitt Romney would be outraged that his high taxes were paying for the cushy government pensions of three other Republican presidential candidates (if he paid high taxes, that is). The only one to opt out? RON PAUL  (businessweek.com) (55)
(Some Guy) Amusing Early candidate for Ultimate Prankster 2012: Farmer admits to spray painting hawks pinkish-red before releasing them just to trick bird watchers into thinking they've discovered a new species  (heraldsun.com.au) (76)
(Some Guy) Amusing January 19 is National Popcorn Day so Your Candidate sucks, Apple products rule, global warming is a myth, declawing pitbulls should be outlawed, and circumcision ought to be mandatory  (popcorn.org) (131)
(Herald Tribune) Florida Florida Department of Law Enforcement needs to test new Breathalyzers, but how? Buy a bunch of Jim Beam and Doritos and get the employees drunk, of course  (heraldtribune.com) (43)


Wed January 18, 2012
(CSMonitor) Amusing Colbert is stealing votes from Ron Paul in the all-important "I'm voting for a joke candidate" race  (csmonitor.com) (30)


Tue January 17, 2012
(Sun Sentinel) Florida Budget crisis has delayed school repairs and halted the purchase of new laptops and buses at a Florida school. Do they save money any way possible? Or do they debate on spending $111,000 for a new scoreboard  (sun-sentinel.com) (72)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida Drunk driver who killed 2 people on Christmas 2007 has a moment of Florida clarity and decides to sue them  (tampabay.com) (239)
(USA Today) Florida O.J. Simpson loses Florida home to bank foreclosure. Current asking price now slashed to the bone  (content.usatoday.com) (77)


Mon January 16, 2012
(The Weekly Standard) Sad Wacko fringe fundies are flaunting the tax exempt status of churches to campaign outright for their candidates from the pulpit  (weeklystandard.com) (168)
(WorldNetDaily) Silly Chuck Norris has written a new column for WND, where he asks the GOP candidates one question, and it has nothing to do about whether or not they think they could take him  (wnd.com) (139)


Sun January 15, 2012
(LiveLeak) Scary This is why you don't go out on Friday the 13th. Holy. Farking. Shiat  (liveleak.com) (60)


Sat January 14, 2012
(doubtful news) Spiffy Doubtful News is definitely not superstitious about giving FARK credit for a special Friday the 13th headline  (doubtfulnews.com) (0)


Fri January 13, 2012
(Buzzfeed) Asinine Rolling Stone writer who broke the McChrystal scandal paints a charming picture of petulant then-candidate Obama in Iraq: "(sigh) Pictures? With the troops? Again? But I already got my photo-op (pout)"  (buzzfeed.com) (125)
(Paste Magazine) Fail The thirty best Coachella performances of all time. Difficulty: Leonard Cohen and Paul McCartney aren't in the top two slots, and The Strokes are on the list, which immediately invalidates it  (pastemagazine.com) (65)
(CBS News) Interesting Ron Paul says he and his supporters are "nibbling at the heels" of Mitt Romney, making Romney the first candidate in US history to be in danger of being nibbled to death by dicks  (cbsnews.com) (58)
(CBC) Unlikely It's Friday the 13th, a day in which close to one billion dollars is lost from people missing work because too scared to leave their homes, losses to airlines from fear of flying, and mirror breakage  (cbc.ca) (94)


Thu January 12, 2012
(Washington Post) Sad Thirty years ago, an unlucky group of airline passengers went swimming in the Potomac River instead of Florida. Here's why all of aviation is now safer for it  (washingtonpost.com) (102)
(Fox News) Amusing The GOP is going to punish Florida for holding an early primary by giving them bad hotel rooms  (foxnews.com) (22)
(Think Progress) Hero Not news: Iraqi immigrants open restaurant in Mass. News: Vandal throws a rock through the window to drive them out. Hero: Veterans show solidarity by organizing a mass patronage of restaurant  (thinkprogress.org) (83)
(PoliGu.com) Interesting Answer some questions, find your Republican candidate  (thepoliticalguide.com) (164)
(TC Palm) Florida Man calls 911 while in taxi and claims he's being kidnapped to avoid paying cab fare. Because this is Florida, he makes seven more 911 calls when the first fails and gets his drunk self thrown in jail  (blogs.tcpalm.com) (4)


Wed January 11, 2012
(The Register) Scary Suicidal Xbox factory workers talked out of entering red ring of death  (theregister.co.uk) (54)
(Uproxx) Sad You know it must be a bad crop of GOP presidential candidates if Stephen Colbert is polling at 5% in South Carolina when he's not even running  (uproxx.com) (57)


Tue January 10, 2012
(STLToday) Amusing Republican gubernatorial candidate claims to have an Economics degree. Conveniently omits that it is a Home Economics degree  (stltoday.com) (42)
(Des Moines Register) Unlikely Man who passed around pro-KKK fliers in his neighborhood says they were meant to educate, not intimidate  (desmoinesregister.com) (155)
(The Daily Beast) Obvious Using nicotine patches has the same success rate as quitting cold turkey. However, they do give you much better dreams and greatly reduce the homicidal urges  (thedailybeast.com) (128)
(Palm Beach Post) Florida 4 guns + 3 men + 2 dead alligators + 1 sugar cane field = Florida tag  (palmbeachpost.com) (15)


Mon January 09, 2012
(Michelle Malkin) Amusing Far left socialist declares that the Republicans are screwed because all their candidates are idiots. Oh wait, it's Michelle Malkin  (michellemalkin.com) (161)
(CTV) News Feds uncover suspected Islamic extremist plot to bomb Tampa; Newsflash and Florida tags dive for cover  (ctv.ca) (295)
(SLTrib) Obvious Ap's fact check of the latest GOP debate finds that there MAY have been a few actual, verifiable facts uttered by the candidates, though they are still checking on whether somebody's real name could really be "Newt Gingrich"  (sltrib.com) (38)
(Local10) Florida How to dress for success in Florida: Man wears "how to cook crack" shirt to court appearance on drug charges  (local10.com) (33)


Sat January 07, 2012
(Washington Post) PSA Tonight, the remaining GOP candidates square off in preparation for the New Hampshire primary. Will Santorum blast Romney? Will it be worth watching since Bachmann is gone? The derp begins at 9pm ET on ABC  (washingtonpost.com) (1164)
(Entertainment Weekly) Stupid "The Devil Inside" makes $16.9M on Friday, projected to have a $35M opening weekend. This is why we can't have nice things, America  (insidemovies.ew.com) (99)


Fri January 06, 2012
(Fark) Survey It's Friday, so we're back on track with the Fark Weird News Quiz. You've never seen so many farkers scoring at once  (fark.com) (51)
(The New York Times) Interesting President Obama is trying to tie the Republican candidates to the unpopular Congress using a two-tier strategy. Let's see if the Republicans notice  (nytimes.com) (52)
(wmal.com) Silly GOP Florida Rep. Allen West hates President Obama's plan to cut military spending and that Speaker Boehner is leading an effective "kabuki dance" in Congress. Now there's a horrifying image you can never take back  (wmal.com) (53)
(The Smoking Gun) Amusing Some of today's contestants in TSG's Friday photo fun have set the bar juuuuust a little lower than the other. See if you can pick who stole what. Contest ends at 6pm Eastern  (thesmokinggun.com) (5)
(Some Guy) Florida Hot Florida teacher arrested for soliciting sex with minors - just kidding, Kill it with Fire  (news-journalonline.com) (34)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida On the one hand, you shot the guy 18 times. On the other hand, the guy was molesting a kid. The Florida tag finds itself in a moral quandary  (tampabay.com) (103)


Thu January 05, 2012
(Scientific American) Obvious Newt Gingrich named geekiest GOP presidential candidate by Scientific American; promptly cancels his subscription and starts subscribing to Discover  (scientificamerican.com) (49)
(The New Republic) Obvious Conservative Republicans tragically fail to stick with a candidate. Not that sticking with one would be any less tragic, mind you  (tnr.com) (29)
(TC Palm) Florida Florida man bitten, stabbed after argument with girlfriend over missing New Year's Eve 'ball drop' on TV. To prevent future 'ball drop' violence, police suggest he set his DVR next time  (blogs.tcpalm.com) (10)
(USA Today) Sad After getting behind the latest front-runner and only finding santorum, the Tea Party is left unsatisfied and still searching for a unifying candidate  (usatoday.com) (36)
(Guitar World) Amusing Lamb of God frontman announces Presidential candidacy. Now you've got someone to vote for  (guitarworld.com) (51)


Wed January 04, 2012
(Salon) Stupid The @MentionMachine ranks candidates based on how often they're tweeted about, so congratulations, President Paul  (salon.com) (34)
(Yahoo) Florida TOSU linebacker says Florida Gators are classless for calling him a "cracker" during the Gator Bowl. Who knew "cracker" was still a racial slur that anyone used?  (rivals.yahoo.com) (72)
(Some Guy) Sad Chronic KY gubernatorial candidate Gatewood Galbraith passes  (state-journal.com) (58)


Tue January 03, 2012
(Some Iowan) Interesting After a year and a half, tens of millions spent, and several candidates; so begins the actual voting. (Your Iowa Caucus thread.)  (iowagop.org) (lots)
(ACLU) Spiffy ACLU's Liberty Watch 2012 issues its Civil Liberties Report Card on the candidates: Highest Score (and lowest probability of actually being elected): Gary Johnson  (aclulibertywatch.org) (39)
(OKHenderson) Obvious "Republican candidates more interested in defeating Obama than rebuilding America" says known socialist Obama supporter Mike Huckabee (R-Arkansas)  (okhenderson.com) (254)
(ABC) Interesting The bride's family pays for the wedding, the groom's for the rehearsal dinner, and the best man buys strippers for the bachelor party. But who supposed to pay for the bridalplasty?  (abcnews.go.com) (119)
(Politico) Amusing Donald Trump is ready to run on a third party ticket because he thinks the candidates are yo-yos  (politico.com) (80)


Mon January 02, 2012
(CNN) Interesting Because of Iowa's halfway decent economic state, they might be disinterested in candidates focusing on the economy. With helpful photo of what Iowans disinterested in a candidate may look like  (politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com) (30)
(sunshine state news) Spiffy Sunshine State News writes: "One can't but help love Florida, the only state that has its own tag on FARK.com, a website dedicated to tawdry, off-beat news stories"  (sunshinestatenews.com) (1)
(Sun Sentinel) Florida Mass panic hits Florida as temperatures plunge to a freezing 60 degrees  (sun-sentinel.com) (50)
(ESPN) Fail Most members of professional sports teams maintain a public air of solidarity in accepting equal blame for a disappointing effort. Then, there's the 2011 New York Jets  (espn.go.com) (57)
(CNN) Obvious Iowa voters don't feel the remaining Republican candidates for President give them enough options. Apparently some chapters of the DSM-IV still don't have candidates representing them  (cnn.com) (87)
(truTV) Unlikely Everything tin foil hatters need to know about the tin foil hat candidate, such as how his tin foil hat image is the result of tin foil hat lies spread by tin foil hatterists against him  (trutv.com) (11)


Sun January 01, 2012
(Fark) Photoshop Theme: With Christmas over, Photoshop another holiday that doesn't need to be commercialized  (fark.com) (30)
(Jacksonville.com) Spiffy Florida Times Union notes that FARK was very quick to pick up the "crony capitalism" story relating to the loan from the Energy Department (3rd section) before the rest of media discovered it  (jacksonville.com) (1)


Sat December 31, 2011
(Fark) Scary It's not Friday, it's a very special Saturday edition of the Fark Weird News Quiz  (fark.com) (28)
(Some Guy) Sad Key West -- which writers Ernest Hemingway, Tennessee Williams, Robert Frost, Judy Blume, Robert Stone, Jim Harrison, Maria Bishop, Mark Childress and others have called home -- is down to one bookstore. Sad easily trumps Florida  (keysnet.com) (142)


Fri December 30, 2011
(JTA News) Followup Spiffy: Samoa to switch timezones across the international dateline, skipping Friday. Interesting: Rabbis can't decide when Jews on Samoa should observe the Sabbath. Stupid: There is only one Jew on the whole island  (jta.org) (58)
(Washington Examiner) Obvious Romney's flip-flopping goes back nearly a decade, where he ran as a pro-choice candidate in Massachusetts because polling told him pro-lifers were out   (campaign2012.washingtonexaminer.com) (54)
(Washington Post) Scary Washington likes to dump its bad news late on Friday...but for the -really- bad news they wait until late on Friday right before Christmas: "And a $4.2 trillion deficit is something that Americans need to know about"  (washingtonpost.com) (94)
(Some Guy) Photoshop Friday Instashop Challenge: If North Korea can Photoshop Dear Leader's funeral to make it better, then so can Fark  (media.zenfs.com) (39)
(The New York Times) Sad The Republican candidates want limited government, right? Not so much  (nytimes.com) (63)


Thu December 29, 2011
(AL.com) Florida After BP donated $30 million to help Florida's tourism industry, officials spent the money on a poker tournament, fleece blankets, sports towels, a "most deserving mom" contest, and a prom for senior citizens  (blog.al.com) (21)
(Sun Sentinel) Florida A few of the many reasons Fark's 'Florida' tag was in heavy use in 2011  (weblogs.sun-sentinel.com) (12)
(Some Guy) Followup Following the lead of Pinellas County, Florida in protecting American precious bodily fluids is Hartland Township... Michigan?  (hartland.patch.com) (14)


Wed December 28, 2011
(The Smoking Gun) Amusing Florida stripper restores faith in humanity on Christmas Eve  (thesmokinggun.com) (102)
(CNN) Interesting From frontal assaults to Washington, to full-blown kamikaze strikes to all of the GOP, Candidates turn negative in multimillion dollar Iowa television ad bombardment  (cnn.com) (37)


Tue December 27, 2011
(Some Guy) Stupid RI to VA: I'll see your exclusion of Newt Gingrich and raise you an exclusion of every Republican candidate  (golocalprov.com) (98)
(ABC) Followup Back in 2006 Gingrich was for Mitt Romney's healthcare plan in MA and supported the individual mandate. What do you call a flip flop that flip flops off another candidate's flip flop?  (abcnews.go.com) (79)
(Radar Magazine) Obvious Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg spent the holiday weekend in Vietnam, where Facebook is banned. That sounds about right  (radaronline.com) (28)
(Fark) Scary Tell your holiday horror stories here  (fark.com) (361)


Mon December 26, 2011
(Some Blog) Unlikely PROBLEMS: Your candidate isn't going to win the primary, and SOPA may not pass. SOLUTION: BLAME ANONYMOUS   (thenewcivilrightsmovement.com) (178)
(Cracked) Amusing A guide to holiday cocktails written after drinking them all. Bonus: Only one page  (cracked.com) (84)
(Discover) Sappy Happy pareidolidays   (blogs.discovermagazine.com) (4)


Sun December 25, 2011
(I-Mockery) Obvious Die Hard is the best Christmas holiday action movie ever made. Ho, ho, ho  (i-mockery.com) (163)


Sat December 24, 2011
(Fark) Photoshop Holiday Theme: What else Santa does on Christmas Eve  (fark.com) (14)
(Some Guy) Silly Trump switches his voter registration from 'Republican' to 'Unaffiliated' just in case the GOP fails to nominate a candidate who can defeat Obama  (couriermail.com.au) (78)
(Onion AV Club) Amusing Displaced hoser tries to discern meaning of Canadian Christmas by listening to 12 straight hours of Canadian artists' greatest holiday albums and songs. "Why didn't anyone prepare me for how awful Rita MacNeil is?"  (avclub.com) (40)
(Fox Business) Stupid Author of "Scroogenomics: Why You Shouldn't Buy Presents for the Holidays," Compares Christmas shopping to the Homer Simpson theory of why people do things: "It's because they're stupid, that's why"  (foxbusiness.com) (72)


Fri December 23, 2011
(Sun Sentinel) Florida The only white Christmas in Florida comes from bales of cocaine washing ashore  (sun-sentinel.com) (34)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida St. Petersburg Times notes that no article about the weirdness of Florida is complete without FARK finding a way to poke fun (1st paragraph)  (tampabay.com) (1)
(The Straight Dope) Scary If "Holiday Heart Syndrome" doesn't get you, the tree bugs will. Merry frickin' Christmas  (straightdope.com) (31)
(Some Guy) Photoshop Photoshop holiday theme: Nutcracker  (daytonballet.org) (24)
(Talking Points Memo) Sad Happy holidays from Fox News, where President Obama is a "skinny, ghetto crackhead"   (tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com) (235)
(CNN) VideoEdit Rick Santorum has a new 'popup video' ad in Iowa. Make your own popup video ad for a Presidential candidate   (politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com) (46)
(The Daily Caller) Weird Stop me if you've heard this chestnut before: Female governor could be VP candidate for GOP  (dailycaller.com) (77)
(UPI) Asinine As you board your flight home for the holidays, spare a thought for the brave TSA workers who are tirelessly protecting us from the perils of homemade jam in carry-on luggage  (upi.com) (79)


Thu December 22, 2011
(Fark) FarkParty Holiday Fark Party - No plans for Christmas Eve? Join us in LA for some drinks and eats  (fark.com) (83)
(Talking Points Memo) Unlikely Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker's holiday TV ad: "Let's put our differences aside"  (tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com) (265)
(Some Guy) Obvious HOLIDAY HEART SYNDROME will KILL YOU. Now go eat, drink, and be merry  (wfaa.com) (46)
(NYPost) Fail Those ding-dongs at Hostess are planning to declare bankruptcy for the ho-ho holidays  (nypost.com) (57)
(Yahoo) Obvious Even when it comes to sending cards wishing people Happy Holidays, Fox News can't resist being a dick about it  (news.yahoo.com) (69)
(Some Tiny Violin) Interesting According to etiquette experts, holiday restaurant tipping varies widely among cheapskates, tightwads, and skinflints  (vancouversun.com) (74)
(Some Guy) Silly Who said democracy was dead? Meet Vermin Supreme, presidential candidate  (gloucestertimes.com) (26)
(Live Science) Obvious From the Ric Romero Institute: Drunk office holiday parties are full of unwanted sexual advances  (livescience.com) (66)
(Sun Sentinel) Hero 81-year old woman beats up the gun-toting man who mugged her daughter, demands he get off her lawn. Sure, it happened in Florida, but this woman deserves the Hero tag  (sun-sentinel.com) (19)


Wed December 21, 2011
(Team Coco) Sappy This holiday season, let's remember the heroes of WWII, who braved freezing conditions in the Battle for Bastogne in 1944. We remember this non-denominational Xmas event with live action, role playing bunnies  (teamcoco.com) (22)
(Some Guy) Scary Mistletoe, snow spray, bubble lights, alcohol, and other common Christmas items that will kill you, because death never takes a holiday  (syracuse.com) (56)
(Yahoo) Misc 12 forgotten family holiday movies  (shine.yahoo.com) (122)
(TMZ) Interesting AI runner-up David Archuleta announces he's taking a break from performing. Tulsa Holiday Inn promptly checks for availability of Justin Guarini  (tmz.com) (19)
(Cracked) Amusing And now presenting, the seven types of holiday fights you are about to get in  (cracked.com) (110)
(Politico) Sad Profiles in courage: presidential candidates who decry, but do nothing to stop the outside organizations that spend millions of dollars to attack their opponents  (politico.com) (18)
(msnbc) Obvious Biggest complaints by holiday shoppers: narrow aisles, wider customers   (lifeinc.today.msnbc.msn.com) (33)
(Toronto Sun) Followup Well it's Bud the Spud from the bright red mud, still languishing in Lebanese prison. The times are grim, and his hopes are dim because the Holidays and Hassan's coming. The Holidays and Hassan's coming  (torontosun.com) (28)
(Uproxx) Spiffy Is there anything more distinctly American than hilariously awful family holiday photos? No, there is not  (uproxx.com) (110)
(Deadspin) Video ESPN later regretted putting its crowd mic in the middle of a section of extremely drunk Florida International fans  (deadspin.com) (35)


Tue December 20, 2011
(wptv.com) Florida Florida wants your tired, your poor, your huddled masses. Check that. What we really want are nude Europeans  (wptv.com) (42)
(wpbf.com) Florida Every item in a Florida Macys was marked down to $5 thanks to two now former employees  (wpbf.com) (55)


Mon December 19, 2011
(Houston Chronicle) Spiffy From "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" to "The Star Wars Holiday Special" it's time to celebrate the worst of Christmas  (chron.com) (64)
(CNN) Stupid Forget about the holidays, the pending global recession, and the death of Kim Jung Il - Britney Spears has changed her Facebook status to "engaged". It's not news, it's CNN  (marquee.blogs.cnn.com) (10)


Sun December 18, 2011
(NPR) Spiffy Jingle Jams: come for the picture of an orangutan in Christmas clothes playing the ukelele, stay for the holiday mix you can actually tolerate  (npr.org) (14)


Sat December 17, 2011
(Fox News) Scary Florida A&M student who died in recent hazing incident was beaten like a drum  (foxnews.com) (108)
(Daily Mail) Followup Joe Paterno delayed forwarding reports of Sandusky's alleged sex abuse because he didn't want to ruin anyone's weekend... Or month... Or Holidays... Or decade  (dailymail.co.uk) (52)
(SLTrib) Amusing Atheist, agnostic group launches holiday-season billboards in Utah, to the confusion of locals  (sltrib.com) (507)
(Washington Post) Amusing Members of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster will be erecting their holiday display this weekend at the Loudoun County, VA Courthouse. Naturally, some people have a problem with this  (washingtonpost.com) (439)
(BattleSwarm) PSA Gen. Ricardo Sanchez drops out of Texas Senate race. "Right now the only Democratic candidates are a guy that doesn't look old enough to drink and a guy who's been dead for 191 years"  (battleswarmblog.com) (19)
(Some Gnome) Sappy NBA player and former University of Kentucky bad boy DeMarcus Cousins buys a random kid an iPod while out holiday shopping  (img.ly) (24)
(Miami Herald) Florida South Florida charter schools keep scores up the easy way: by making sure the short bus doesn't stop there  (miamiherald.com) (77)
(Daily Mail) Stupid A $1.5 million 24-carat gold Rolls-Royce would be the perfect vulgar holiday gift for the 1 percenter on your list  (dailymail.co.uk) (48)
(Huffington Post) Florida Gov. Rick Scott tries to bond with Florida A&M University students by telling them he came from public housing too. Students: "We're not poor"  (huffingtonpost.com) (63)


Fri December 16, 2011
(Space) Sad NASA pulls the plug on Space Shuttle Discovery for the last time Friday, Dec. 16, more than 28 years after the NASA's retired fleet leader first came alive. A faint, "I'm afraid I can't do that, Dave" was heard  (space.com) (112)
(Some Grinch) Silly Leave the Christmas cookies, cakes, candy bars, and soda at home ya little fatties, school is no place for yummy holiday celebrations this year  (boston.cbslocal.com) (43)
(eBay) PSA Want to own a piece of Fark history for the holidays? Or need some load balancers for your network? You're in luck. (Proceeds go to a college fund for the late Carl Wade (Rabiddog)'s daughter)  (cgi.ebay.com) (169)
(Some Guy) Florida Man arrested for sex with roommate's three-year-old Chihuahua. Sorry, but bestiality in Florida was so last year. Seriously, It was legal last year  (wptv.com) (118)
(CBS News) Spiffy Just in time for the holidays - your guide to regifting  (cbsnews.com) (33)
(Some Guy) Spiffy It's the holiday season, so the question must be asked: What ever happened to the kids in "Home Alone"?  (thefw.com) (41)


Thu December 15, 2011
(Some Beer Snob) Florida In this woman's defense, throwing beer away IS a punishable offense. . "The affidavit didn't state whether the beer was domestic or import"  (tcoasttalk.com) (21)
(Washington Post) Followup Wait 'til the Florida Family Association finds out that Lowe's has donated to Muslim charities  (washingtonpost.com) (40)
(io9) Stupid Watch Glee's very special Star Wars Holiday Special...or don't ruin the rest of your day  (io9.com) (65)
(Politico) Amusing The eight most memorable attacks the GOP candidates have made against one another since May  (politico.com) (19)


Wed December 14, 2011
(Some Guy) Dumbass During November and December of last year over 13,000 people were treated in ERs nationwide due to injuries involving holiday decorations. If there is a "war on Christmas" I'd say Christmas is winning  (emaxhealth.com) (44)
(Think Progress) Followup Turns out most of the companies that the Florida Family Association claimed pulled their ads from All-American Muslim...didn't  (thinkprogress.org) (96)
(Wimp) Video Crew of HMS Ocean sends best ever holiday Christmas video to their families  (wimp.com) (25)
(Mental Floss) Amusing 11 offbeat holidays you still have time to celebrate. It's a Festivus for the rest of us  (mentalfloss.com) (41)
(Some Guy) Strange Florida's drunkest cities also tend to be their grayest, with nightmare-inducing photo of what drunken grandparents might look like  (blogs.miaminewtimes.com) (53)
(MSNBC) Strange Florida man wills $1 million house to help government deficit. National debt pauses for three seconds  (usnews.msnbc.msn.com) (17)
(Doubtful News) Spiffy Doubtful News thanks FARK for showing them the irreverent holiday story of Atheists who donated money to Doctors Without Borders  (doubtfulnews.com) (4)
(Daily Mail) Obvious When you are loading £2m into the trunk of your car to go on holiday, it might be a good idea to employ some sort of security measures  (dailymail.co.uk) (31)


Tue December 13, 2011
(SacBee) Cool Medical marijuana dispensary closing, giving away free pot this Friday. In related news, flight bookings to Sacramento spike  (sacbee.com) (53)
(The Ledger) Florida After being banned for years, Florida is finally allowing same sex couples to adopt  (theledger.com) (135)
(Herald Tribune) Obvious Herald Tribune talks about the weirdness of Florida stories: "Strange news aggregator Fark.com, which created a special label just for Florida stories based on the state's track record"  (heraldtribune.com) (1)
(The Consumerist) Asinine Target continuing its holiday customer relations makeover by refusing to allow a group of students into to their store to spend their money raised to purchased needed items for abused babies  (consumerist.com) (240)
(Yahoo) Obvious Obamacare Mandate has thrown more than 100,000 health insurance agents and brokers under the bus and given them the gift of an unemployment line just before the holidays  (news.yahoo.com) (680)
(Daily Mail) Scary Beware of fake "designer" gifts this holiday season, in particular these exploding candles  (dailymail.co.uk) (44)


Mon December 12, 2011
(Atlanta Journal Constitution) Fail Thinking about spending this month's mortgage payment on Christmas presents for your kids? Go ahead. They don't like to foreclose during the holidays  (ajc.com) (42)
(Boston.com) Amusing Finally, for that filthy, dirty beatnik on your holiday gift list; Jack Kerouac Soap  (boston.com) (78)
(Daily Mail) Sad One in three will go into debt to pay for holiday presents. Merry... Christmas?  (dailymail.co.uk) (125)


Sun December 11, 2011
(NPR) Obvious Obama: "Happy holidays everyone." Congress: "For hate's sake we spit our last breath at thee"  (npr.org) (130)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida Consenting adults arrested for doing adult things to several other consenting adults in the privacy of their homes. Welcome to Florida, USA: Home of the free, land of the prudes  (tampabay.com) (145)


Sat December 10, 2011
(NPR) Followup Former governor and ambassador John Huntsman was removed from tonight's debate as he is no longer considered a "viable candidate" while professional crazy person Ron Paul and The Human Google Bomb Rick Santorum are still invited  (npr.org) (107)
(Des Moines Register) PSA Tonight at 8PM, the remaining GOP candidates square off for a debate in Des Moines, Iowa in an attempt to be the last seated when the music stops. Here's a handy rundown of the hopefuls, from RON PAUL to the corndog lady  (caucuses.desmoinesregister.com) (882)
(Some Guy) Spiffy UFC 140 discussion thread. Jon Jones and Lyoto Machida. Plus big Nog, little Nog, pour yourself a glass of eggnog, the Hairrow and many more great fighters will take to the octagon. First fights start at 5:50pm ET  (ufc.com) (667)


Fri December 09, 2011
(Orlando Sentinel) Florida Sleep easy tonight, Florida. Instead of catching murderers the police are cracking down on pizza flyer deliveries  (orlandosentinel.com) (39)
(Sun Sentinel) Florida Grinch steals holidays from Boca Raton  (sun-sentinel.com) (42)
(Some Guy) Florida Holiday Tip: When decorating your yard with Christmas cheer, be sure it's not the same Christmas cheer you stole from your neighbor's house a block away  (933flz.com) (19)
(My Fox DC) Sick Holiday cooking tip #28: Castrating lambs with your teeth can make you sick  (myfoxdc.com) (74)
(New York Daily News) Obvious Trump finds it difficult to overcomb lack of candidates at his debate  (nydailynews.com) (127)


Tue December 06, 2011
(Forbes) Silly The holiday season is upon us, so it's time to roll out the annual "things to not do at the office party" list. With bonus slideshow depicting what office stud losing control might look like  (forbes.com) (25)
(The Raw Story) Followup Most politicians would respond to Pelosi's "thousand pages of dirt" claim with a simple denial." Newt Gingrich, however, immediately validates it by suggesting he'll "file charges" if she talks  (rawstory.com) (277)


Mon December 05, 2011
(KPGM) Strange County forced to spend $1200 on new light bulbs for holiday star on roof of courthouse after they're all stolen... by starlings  (bartlesvilleradio.com) (28)
(Vanishing New York) Amusing Old-school NYC metalworking shop realizes second life after being sold to real-estate sharks back in 2008, stays standing as pop-up holiday gift boutique selling monocles and artisanal yurts  (vanishingnewyork.blogspot.com) (15)
(National Post) Followup Cain to support GOP candidate with family values closest to his own  (news.nationalpost.com) (108)
(CNN) Fail Trump on Ron Paul: "Many of his views and presentation make him a clown-like candidate". HONK  (politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com) (96)


Sun December 04, 2011
(Yahoo) Interesting Top ten places to avoid this holiday season  (travel.yahoo.com) (63)
(Gawker) Photoshop Photoshop Theme: Fark's 2011 Holiday List of Unsafe Children's Toys  (cache.gawker.com) (45)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida If you grow anything with hydroponics in Florida the police will automatically assume you are growing pot and come kick down your door without a warrant  (tampabay.com) (166)
(Herald Tribune) Florida Smoking crack, passing counterfeit money, smacking up juvies, spitting on arrestees, cracking heads open -- just another day in the life of corrupt untouchable cops in the great state of Florida  (heraldtribune.com) (148)
(Daily Mail) Dumbass And you thought your holiday family gatherings were awkward  (dailymail.co.uk) (86)


Sat December 03, 2011
(Some Guy) PSA Protip: If your disturbed wife's shopping list includes plastic sheets, gallons of bleach, eight roasting pans, and a Sawzall, you might want to spend the holidays elsewhere  (heraldnet.com) (82)
(Daily Mail) Interesting St. Petersburg, Florida has again been named the nation's saddest city, God's waiting room  (dailymail.co.uk) (83)


Fri December 02, 2011
(WWSB ABC 7) Florida Just FYI, ordering "blunt and some herbs" at the Burger King drive-thru could get your ass thrown into jail in Florida  (mysuncoast.com) (72)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida Protip: If you're going to make a career out of carjacking, learn how to drive a stick shift. Florida tag barely squeezes out dumbass tag  (tampabay.com) (71)
(Fark) Cool It's the first anniversary of the greatest Fark holiday of all. Merry Biatchmas to all, and to all a good fight  (fark.com) (72)
(Talking Points Memo) Followup When asked if his candidate would participate in the NewsMax debate moderated by Donald Trump, Huntsman's campaign adviser responded, "lol." Seriously   (livewire.talkingpointsmemo.com) (173)
(The Smoking Gun) Amusing Friday photo fun: Which crime did the time? Contest ends 6 p.m. EST  (thesmokinggun.com) (7)
(Sun Sentinel) Florida Armada of jellyfish seen floating towards Florida coast  (sun-sentinel.com) (43)
(Talking Points Memo) Followup Now that he's apparently a viable candidate, New Gingrich has supporters coming out of the woodwork. "We're not surprised by his resurgence." Apparently you were, otherwise you'd've stood by him all along  (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com) (71)
(USA Today) Obvious Mitt Romney calls Newt Gingrich a 'life-long politician'. In other news, Romney continues to be a lifelong presidential candidate  (content.usatoday.com) (13)
(Fark) Survey Fark's Weird News Quiz. Come for the nudity, stay for the Florida  (fark.com) (16)
(CBS News) Dumbass "Really poor children in really poor neighborhoods have no habit of working, and they have no one around them who works" Guess which GOP candidate said it? Guess  (cbsnews.com) (504)


Thu December 01, 2011
(Frosty) Interesting Pro tip : Had a little too much Holiday party? Shove an ice cube up your butt, of course  (kbkw.com) (43)
(Some Guy) Florida Nothing puts you into the holiday spirit more than bopping mom on the head with a bottle of eggnog  (wptv.com) (14)
(USA Today) Hero Good news, everybody: Black Friday proved that Americans have recovered from their temporary fear of credit cards and are once again charging like the True Patriots we've always known they are  (usatoday.com) (59)
(Some Guy) Misc It's not truly the holidays without a Soft Tinsel Sausage Dog or Inflatable Santa in the Outhouse  (fenton-highridge.patch.com) (10)


Wed November 30, 2011
(Salon) Fail Political writer in a political blog complains that the political coverage of a political candidate is only talking about his politics  (salon.com) (40)
(Some Guy) Unlikely How to get away with not giving any gifts for the holidays  (missminimalist.com) (93)
(Rasmussen Reports) Obvious A new Rasmussen poll finds 70% of American adults prefer stores that use signs with Merry Christmas over Happy Holidays  (rasmussenreports.com) (377)
(News.com.au) Scary In anticipation of Israel's extremely imminent WWIII-initiating attack upon Iran, Britain has evacuated its embassy. Enjoy your holidays  (news.com.au) (192)
(TC Palm) Florida After 14 years of failed peacemaking initiatives between a Florida woman and her neighbor, the woman takes one last stab at reconciliation, mooning the neighbor and warning of her 'Cuban temper.' With I'd hit it pic  (blogs.tcpalm.com) (54)


Tue November 29, 2011
(CBS News) Obvious Donald Trump says he'll join the Presidential race in May when his "Celebrity Apprentice" contract expires, but only if Republicans can't field a viable candidate. So, President Trump 2012 then  (cbsnews.com) (63)
(Chow.com) Cool In case you were worried you wouldn't gain enough weight this holiday season, here's a little masterpiece that can only be described as "The Turducken of cheese balls"  (chow.com) (28)
(Yahoo) Obvious Behind the Cheddar Curtain: Wisconsin woman calls 911 to try to stop her husband from leaving a bar in the final hours of the long holiday weekend  (news.yahoo.com) (14)
(Motherboard.tv) Interesting Evolution explains why you went mentally insane on Black Friday  (motherboard.tv) (43)
(Jacksonville.com) Florida Look, one more time- if you buy a hooker and the sex is no good, do not kidnap her baby and leave it in a field. How many times do we need to go over this, people of Florida?  (jacksonville.com) (28)


Mon November 28, 2011
(Huffington Post) Sad Shoppers step over dead man's body in mad rush for Black Friday bargains. Hey, a deal's a deal  (huffingtonpost.com) (106)
(TC Palm) Florida Florida man accused of shooting a lawn mower and brawling with his son tells cops, "Fighting is what redneck people do." Cops concede that, but say blasting a riding mower with a .380 pistol crosses the line  (blogs.tcpalm.com) (54)
(Short List) Weird Who would you vote for in today's Egyptian elections, based on the candidates' logos? It's got to be flowery space shuttle man  (shortlist.com) (54)
(CNN) Cool $52.4 billion spent on Black Friday. Suck it, Occupiers  (money.cnn.com) (326)


Sun November 27, 2011
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida Florida is producing 33% fewer Fark.com stories than usual  (tampabay.com) (91)
(Daily Mail) Dumbass Father of the Year candidate is a 34-year-old on welfare, has had 15 children with 13 different women, and has two more on the way. Bonus: His name is Cumming  (dailymail.co.uk) (280)
(Variety) Obvious Actual headline: "Twilight tops Friday B.O." That sounds about right  (variety.com) (71)


Sat November 26, 2011
(CNN) Sad CNN does a summary of the Black Friday incidents. Bonus quote: "most of the reported incidents [happened] at or near Walmart stores." Tag is for humanity  (edition.cnn.com) (70)
(Mediaite) Amusing Local TV newscast apparently not aware of the meaning of "Black Friday', goes with "Black Holiday Shoppers" instead. Close enough?  (mediaite.com) (47)
(Reuters) Asinine If you liked starting your Black Friday at midnight, the retailers did too and plan on continuing it. Thanks, America  (reuters.com) (224)


Fri November 25, 2011
(Yahoo) Cool A 345-pound man in jail is freed nine days early thanks to a Lake County, Fla., judge's "lose-a-pound, gain-a-day" deal. Cool tag beats out Florida tag in this case  (news.yahoo.com) (44)
(ABC 4) Florida News: Man rescued after being stuck in quicksand after eight hours. Not News: He was in Utah. Fark: His rescue beacon was answered by the Air Force - in Florida  (abc4.com) (31)
(Mother Nature Network) Fail The six most epic holiday parade balloon disasters. "Barney attacked us"  (mnn.com) (18)
(Some Guy) Amusing Wild Turkey ruins another family holiday  (wtae.com) (10)
(Cops gonna cop) Sick Sticking that video game in your waist band while trying to prevent your grandson from being injured in a Black Friday mob? You better believe that's a beating  (myfoxphoenix.com) (102)
(Fark) Obvious Fark's Weird News Quiz, the dreaded Black Friday edition. Elbow your way to the front and have at it  (fark.com) (26)
(MSNBC) Cool Yes. Yes. Probably not. No. Let's hope so. It's your Black Friday NHL thread. Game starts at 1pm EST on NBC  (nbcsports.msnbc.com) (190)
(Free Lance News) Spiffy Unknown candidate drives giant-ass bus into unknown town  (freelancenews.com) (55)
(CBS News) Amusing Woman pepper sprays other shoppers to "gain an upper hand" on Black Friday. Guess which store? No, really - guess  (cbsnews.com) (354)


Thu November 24, 2011
(MSNBC) Weird Taiwanese study says having your partner taking multivitamins can lead to casual sex. Friday night now becomes a case of beer and a bottle of Flintstones chewables  (vitals.msnbc.msn.com) (9)


Wed November 23, 2011
(Some Vet Guy) Spiffy Jack Daniel's is donating $100,000 to pay for travel funds for Soldiers at Fort Campbell, Ky., to spend the December holiday season with their families all over the country  (armytimes.com) (53)
(The Consumerist) Followup Kohl's Rebecca Black Friday ad has annoyed just about everyone, and will hopefully cause a Kohl's boycott  (consumerist.com) (190)
(Miami Herald) Florida What better way to endear your fun carnival ride to all the Jewish people in South Florida than to name it after a poison gas used in the Holocaust?  (miamiherald.com) (177)
(TwinCities.com) Stupid With "Black Friday" firmly entrenched, and "Cyber Monday" thrust upon us, the media is trying out "Small Business Saturday"  (twincities.com) (97)
(SLTrib) PSA The holidays can be a good time to see if anyone's fallen and cannot get up  (sltrib.com) (15)
(Cracked) Interesting Five Black Friday myths the media wants you to believe before this week's ad venture  (cracked.com) (79)


Tue November 22, 2011
(Discover) Florida Despite the tag, Florida can actually be quite pretty... when seen from 500 miles away in space  (blogs.discovermagazine.com) (11)
(Some Guy) Florida I'm not sure which is more baffling, stabbing a man with an ice pick in a road rage incident, or owning an ice pick in Florida  (baynews9.com) (44)
(CSMonitor) Unlikely "The GOP candidates have appeared on more stages than the road show of 'Cats.' But haven't the debates been great political theater so far? [Tonight's] event shouldn't disappoint"  (csmonitor.com) (221)
(Orlando Sentinel) Florida Florida county wants to ban dogs from using their smartphones as wireless hotspots  (orlandosentinel.com) (31)
(The Anti-Family Association) PSA The heretics guide to holiday shopping  (action.afa.net) (209)
(Boston.com) PSA When you go to Thanksgiving dinner, be sure to share this advice with your parent, in-law, sister, roommate's mom, or whoever. Report back to Fark on Friday  (boston.com) (113)
(National Post) Followup The Tournament of Muppets is down to the final two candidates and voting is now open to the public. Don't let Gonzo down  (nationalpost.com) (58)
(Short List) Amusing 10 worst supervillains invented by comic book writers on Friday at 4pm  (shortlist.com) (40)
(Some Jolly Old Elf) Photoshop Halloween is barely over, Thanksgiving isn't here yet and stores are putting out Christmas decorations already. Photoshop the results of two holidays being combined into one. LGT example  (thisiskristin.com) (24)
(Talking Points Memo) Interesting GOP presidential candidates who have name-dropped Ronald Reagan more often are higher up in the polls. And the one candidate who's never mentioned him? Well, his popularity has declined  (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com) (41)


Mon November 21, 2011
(CNBC) Obvious Why holiday sales may hinge on how the 1% feels. OCCUPY THE GAP  (cnbc.com) (40)
(Gizmodo) Cool Just in time for the holidays, how to make alcoholic ice cream, the greatest dessert of all time  (gizmodo.com) (37)
(Marketwatch) Interesting New research validates how foods affect genetic expression at the cellular level. Unfortunately, this isn't very good news for people with mozzarella blood type  (marketwatch.com) (17)
(Miami Herald) PSA Florida quarterback leads woebegone NFL team to three consecutive NFL wins. No, not Tebus, this is a guy who completes more than 50% of his passes  (miamiherald.com) (77)


Sun November 20, 2011
(TMZ) Followup When Ice Cube asked John Witherspoon if he'd be interested in another Friday film, Witherspoon responded with a "HELL YEAHHHH"  (tmz.com) (48)
(I Heart Chaos) Interesting FYI, if you're taking your e-ink reader on a plane over the holidays, there's a chance that static from the x-ray machines could permanently destroy the display. Or you could bring a real book  (iheartchaos.com) (87)


Sat November 19, 2011
(io9) Cool A list of 2011's best books on science. Drop a few hints, maybe you won't end up with another one of your Aunt's homemade Snuggies this holiday season  (io9.com) (33)
(Talking Points Memo) PSA Mitt Romney to take time off to watch the other Republican candidates trip over themselves. This is your Des Moines GOP debate thread (5PM EDT)  (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com) (179)
(MSNBC) Hero The only winning Black Friday game is not to play  (bottomline.msnbc.msn.com) (61)


Fri November 18, 2011
(The Smoking Gun) Silly Thank God, it's Friday's Mugshot Roundup  (thesmokinggun.com) (159)
(Some Guy) Sad Father of the Year candidate leaves 13-year-old daughter holding 50 bags of crack as he escapes from police  (nbcphiladelphia.com) (38)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida If you're a county commissioner who likes to post anonymously online about how much you hate gays and fluoridated water, don't expect your fellow politicians to help you out when you're identified  (tampabay.com) (53)
(The Smoking Gun) Amusing Friday Photo Fun Match Game: Match suspects with their respective alias (Opossum, Catfish, Bullfrog, Bull, or Bumblebee)  (thesmokinggun.com) (7)
(Life.com) Interesting Classic cool: Carlos' and Smith's Black Power salute on the Olympic podium in 1968. Forgotten cool: Aussie silver medalist Peter Norman proudly wearing a human rights badge in solidarity with their protest  (life.com) (27)
(Some Guy) Interesting The holiday season is officially here now that cops have made their first arrest of someone carrying gift-wrapped packages of marijuana  (kitsapsun.com) (45)
(FilmDrunk) Strange Another "Friday" movie? DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN   (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) (54)


Thu November 17, 2011
(The Consumerist) Florida Woman decides to line up outside Best Buy for Black Friday deals...nine days before it happens  (consumerist.com) (49)
(The Raw Story) Hero GOP presidential candidate you've never heard of throws his support behind the 99%: "The mayor of New York City is standing on the wrong side of history"  (rawstory.com) (134)
(Detroit News) Asinine Father of the Year candidate crashes car, flees, and abandons his infant and toddler daughters in Detroit  (detnews.com) (43)


Wed November 16, 2011
(Daily Stab) Silly Jimmy Kimmel makes his made up holiday - National Unfriend Day - official with a Peanuts special  (dailystab.com) (12)
(G4TV) Cool Valve wants users of Hat Fortress 2 to make holiday hats, presumably so they can keep their team busy delaying Half-Life 3  (g4tv.com) (55)
(WFTV) Florida Just another day in Florida features a knock down, drag out, school lunchroom fight between two 11-year-old girls ... and a parent  (wftv.com) (66)


Tue November 15, 2011
(I_C_Weener) Obvious Indianapolis Fark Party, at Frontpage Sportsbar on Friday, December 2d, 8:00pm until ???? No truth to the rumor that we will have a Drew look alike contest since the last one was won by a woman. LGT site  (frontpagesportsbar.com) (26)
(The Destin Log) Florida Deputies reprimanded for failing to find gun hidden in man's fat rolls. Florida tag unbuttons pants, goes back for seconds  (thedestinlog.com) (31)
(Sun Sentinel) Florida Fishing in Florida? Don't forget to bring your gun  (sun-sentinel.com) (92)


Mon November 14, 2011
(Salon) Amusing "Oft-bankrupt former fake presidential candidate and television clown Donald Trump announced on Fox and Friends this morning that he is very close to announcing his presidential endorsement." HONK  (salon.com) (93)
(Huffington Post) Obvious Rick Perry the candidate: "Federal spending and Obamacare are killing this country". Rick Perry the governor: "Can I have $24 billion, please? Oh, and we'll take some of that health care money, too"  (huffingtonpost.com) (52)
(Some Scrooge) Obvious Bah, humbug. If you try to smuggle illegal items like marijuana to put in Santa Claus's cookies this holiday season wrapped as gifts, the TSA warns that you won't get away with it  (losangeles.cbslocal.com) (83)
(CBS Local) Followup It seems that retailers forgot one small thing about opening their stores at 10PM and Midnight on Thanksgiving: their employees want to spend time with their families on the holiday  (detroit.cbslocal.com) (218)
(TechWorld) Followup Much like Subby, the Duqu worm doesn't do much work on Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays and Fridays. Must be hung over  (techworld.com.au) (4)


Sat November 12, 2011
(Some Guy) Weird And now the latest from the Florida of the North: man walks into strangers' house, starts putting up Christmas decorations  (whiotv.com) (33)


Fri November 11, 2011
(Miami Herald) Florida Survey finds Florida GOP voters would rather fix the economy by eliminating tax loopholes or foreign wars than cutting Social Security or Medicare. Florida tag seen recoiling in amazement  (miamiherald.com) (151)
(Funny Or Die) Cool The Presidential candidates explained in the most helpful way possible - as D&D characters  (funnyordie.com) (143)


Thu November 10, 2011
(Palm Beach Post) Obvious Florida wants to make auto racing the state sport. Obvious tag seen nudging the bumper of the Florida tag into the track wall  (palmbeachpost.com) (34)
(Orlando Sentinel) Florida You served your country. Then your country ignored you, so you turned to crime. Good news: Florida has designed special prisons painted with American flags just for you  (orlandosentinel.com) (24)


Wed November 09, 2011
(Some Studman69) Sick Herman Cain PAC offers calm support for their candidate against sex harassment allegations. Just kidding, they call the accuser an "ugly b*tch" and claim she works for Taxbama  (hermancainpac.com) (359)
(Some Guy) Florida Inmate sues Florida for turning prison cell into gas chamber  (tampa.cbslocal.com) (76)


Tue November 08, 2011
(Sun Sentinel) Florida In Florida, it only makes news when people AREN'T stupid enough to fall for phone scams  (sun-sentinel.com) (8)
(CNBC) Spiffy UPS to hire 50,000 package smashers for the holidays  (cnbc.com) (18)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida University of South Florida pays $10,000 for a lifesize Darth Vader statue and Captain Kirk's chair, in order to "encourage inspiration beyond conventional thought"  (tampabay.com) (30)


Mon November 07, 2011
(Yahoo) Obvious Among their top presidential candidates, one is as electrifying as oatmeal, another is mired in a scandal, and the third is having to deny he was drunk/high during a major speech. Maybe it IS for the GOP time to panic  (news.yahoo.com) (149)
(Sun Sentinel) Florida Florida teacher eats her lunch at school. Difficulty: two beers and some plums  (weblogs.sun-sentinel.com) (40)
(The Smoking Gun) Fail Florida man whose girlfriend announced her intention to break up with him does the logical thing: tries to commit suicide with Flintstone's vitamins  (thesmokinggun.com) (62)
(TC Palm) Florida Two large-breasted women arrested in topless caper at Florida lounge, demonstrating the risks of being bosom buddies. With SFW photos  (blogs.tcpalm.com) (118)
(Yahoo) Sad Herman Cain was America's first truly "post-racial" candidate-someone for whom race was truly never a factor in his campaign. Until he got accused of sexual harassment anyway  (news.yahoo.com) (199)


Sat November 05, 2011
(Atlanta Journal Constitution) Obvious Holiday sales have started already. That would explain why the stores are playing ♫ SIIIIIIIIIMPLY HAAAAAAVIIIIIIIIING A WONDERFUL CHRISTMASTIIIIIIIIIIIME ♫  (ajc.com) (70)


Fri November 04, 2011
(Talking Points Memo) Followup Kentucky GOP candidate clarifies that he's not criticizing Hindus, but he is inviting them to abandon their heathen faith to follow Jesus. So there   (tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com) (95)
(ESPN) Fail O's are 0 for 3 this offseason, as in three different GM candidates have turned them down  (espn.go.com) (42)
(The Smoking Gun) Misc Friday Fun Photo Match Game: Match mugshot to weapon of choice (macaroni, golf club, bullwhip, candle, or onion)  (thesmokinggun.com) (15)
(Fark) Survey It's Friday, so it's time for this week's episode of the Fark Weird News Quiz to make you feel bad about yourself  (fark.com) (42)


Thu November 03, 2011
(ktvb.com) Spiffy Spaceball economy falters on news Yogurt company is coming to Idaho  (ktvb.com) (29)
(Herald Tribune) Dumbass Gov. Luthor surprised to hear the company he founded is moving its headquarters out of Florida to Tennessee  (htpolitics.com) (43)
(Talking Points Memo) Obvious Cain's downfall puts Newt on deck for the next candidate of the month, followed by Eiffel 65, Mark Cohn, Lou Bega, and the New Radicals  (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com) (224)
(Marketwatch) Spiffy Adidas sales jump  (marketwatch.com) (3)
(Fark) FarkParty Impromptu Twin Cities Fark Party - Friday November 4th @ 6:30pm at Psycho Suzi's  (fark.com) (52)


Wed November 02, 2011
(ESPN) Fail Question: How the fark did UGA actually manage to beat the Florida Gators for the first time in eternity? Answer: *  (espn.go.com) (60)
(Talking Points Memo) Sad Jon Huntsman (R) demands breaking up oil's monopoly, calls for leveled playing field for competing fuels. If only he could just spill the usual garbage like the others and start talking sense AFTER he becomes the candidate   (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com) (49)
(The Hill) Interesting Attorney says GOP presidential candidate Herman Cain violated the confidentiality deal, allowing accuser to speak publicly about the allegations. This could be bad for..... Cain  (thehill.com) (144)


Tue November 01, 2011
(Talking Points Memo) Stupid Kentucky gubernatorial candidate tries desperately to make an issue out of his opponent participating in a Hindu ceremony. Why, yes, he IS a Republican. How did you know?   (tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com) (212)
(NJ.com) Strange Late Friday night, four young women are waiting in a parking garage. One notices another's miniskirt is so short, her buttocks are showing. She reaches over and pulls the skirt down. And then things get oral  (nj.com) (613)
(NPR) Florida Florida: "Due to your parents being illegal immigrants, we're going to have to charge you out-of-state tuition." Student: "But I was born in the US and I live in Florida." Florida: "So?"  (npr.org) (315)


Mon October 31, 2011
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida Your dog ate my bird; I burn your stuff. This is Florida, that's how we roll  (tampabay.com) (19)
(MSP Business Journal) Interesting Target announces plans to open stores at midnight on Thanksgiving in an attempt to get shoppers to spend more time in their stores on Black Friday. Of course, time is pretty much the only thing Americans have to spend this Christmas  (bizjournals.com) (164)


Sun October 30, 2011
(Yahoo) Florida They pull a knife, you pull a gun. They open a Papa Johns next to your Dominos, you burn it to the ground. That's the Florida way  (news.yahoo.com) (94)


Sat October 29, 2011
(Some Guy) Interesting Animal Conservationist Jack Hanna supports hydraulic fracking, electric sulfuric felgercarb, and of course sinusoidal dynamic ram stuffing of starbucks  (altoonamirror.com) (103)


Fri October 28, 2011
(Click Orlando) Florida Florida bans bracelets because: c) Kids might be able to smoke pot with them  (clickorlando.com) (90)
(WorldNetDaily) Silly Hey, instead of trying to find a GOP candidate that can defeat Obama in the next election, why not just file a lawsuit that will prevent Obama from running? What could possibly go wrong?  (wnd.com) (154)
(Talking Points Memo) Interesting How one of those crazy anti-Obama email chains ends up a talking point of a major GOP presidential candidate   (tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com) (68)
(NYPost) Interesting Libtard blasts GOP presidential candidates: "The American people want solutions. You're providing comedy." And by libtard, I mean neoconservative stalwart John Podhoretz  (nypost.com) (83)
(The Smoking Gun) Amusing Stripper? Escort? Subway Sandwich Artist? Match the mugshots with reported professions in the Friday Photo Fun Match Game  (thesmokinggun.com) (21)
(LA Times) Interesting A wild card in the November 2012 election? Coming from the Internet? Maybe, because there's a well-funded "virtual third party," that plans to put a centrist presidential candidate on the ballot in all 50 states  (latimes.com) (94)


Thu October 27, 2011
(Some Guy) Amusing "I hate you all. Go back to Gainesville and manufacture human misery that we can laugh at from afar. That's what Florida is for, why we even keep it around. Being Fark fodder"   (kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com) (20)
(Washington Times) Amusing GOP presidential candidates are asked their favorite movies, and the results are exactly what you'd expect: Herman Cain? The Godfather. Michelle Bachmann? Braveheart. RON PAUL? NONE, MOVIES AREN'T IN THE CONSTITUTION  (washingtontimes.com) (347)
(WBALTV) Dumbass Student goes to principal to express he's been having suicidal thoughts. Principal has student's belongings searched, finds gun. Police arrest student. Problem solved  (wbaltv.com) (76)


Wed October 26, 2011
(CNN) Interesting GOP candidates called "birthers, smokers, jokers." Pickers, grinners, midnight tokers prepare to launch third party  (cnn.com) (63)
(Yahoo) Interesting For decades, the man's family thought he was one of John Wayne Gacy's victims. Today, the family was saddened to learn that he had actually been living in Florida the whole time  (news.yahoo.com) (68)
(Some Guy) Sick Candidate: "Assemblyman has missed a lot of votes." Assemblyman: "I had cancer." Candidate: "That's no excuse"  (mycentraljersey.com) (77)


Tue October 25, 2011
(CNN) Hero In an obvious response to OWS, Obama is going to allow you to consolidate your student loan and pay a lower interest rate  (money.cnn.com) (446)
(Some Yadda Yadda Guy) Stupid Mayoral candidates deny sending letter claiming opponent is "openly gay." NTTAWWT  (lehighvalleylive.com) (58)
(Marketwatch) Spiffy FedEx to deliver 22,000 new jobs this holiday season in new package deal  (marketwatch.com) (22)


Mon October 24, 2011
(Pop Matters) Unlikely John Stewart vs. Michael Moore is a "convincing illustration of the suicidal tendencies, moral bankruptcy, and spiritual decay of the American left"  (popmatters.com) (213)
(NJ.com) Interesting South Brunswick, NJ schools will close to observe religious holiday, celebrating our Lord and Saviour, Krishna  (nj.com) (199)


Sun October 23, 2011
(Some Guy) Florida Woman gets arrested for stealing a cash register with only a quarter in it, faces charges of grand theft and burglary. And this folks, is why we have the Florida tag  (nbcmiami.com) (40)
(Reason Magazine) Interesting Republican politican makes anti-gay slur attacks against a gay candidate. No wait the politician was a democrat and the gay guy was a republican. OK, nothing to see here, move along  (reason.com) (180)


Fri October 21, 2011
(CNN) Followup And here comes the GOP presidential candidates' opinions on Obama's Iraq withdrawal announcement   (politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com) (334)
(Talking Points Memo) Dumbass GOP candidate blames his recent gaffe on departing communications director, Ludacris   (tpmlivewire.talkingpointsmemo.com) (67)
(Atlanta Journal Constitution) Obvious A Georgia mayoral candidate decided that just because he's a thief doesn't mean he shouldn't still run for office. After all, he IS a politician  (ajc.com) (19)
(The Smoking Gun) Amusing Today's Friday Photo Fun gives you the opportunity to put the face with the crime. Subby has a bad feeling about contestant A. Contest ends at 6pm Eastern  (thesmokinggun.com) (15)
(Wonkette) Dumbass Cain: "It's not the government's role to tell people what decisions to make." Interviewer: "Even about abortion?" Cain: "Exactly. Aww crap, I forgot I was a GOP candidate"  (wonkette.com) (222)


Thu October 20, 2011
(The New York Times) Interesting GOP presidential candidate: the six largest financial institutions are bigger than they were before the crisis. There is no evidence that they add sufficient value to offset the systemic risk they pose  (economix.blogs.nytimes.com) (47)
(Sun Sentinel) Florida Serial rapist on the loose in Florida. Police: "We don't know what he's going to do next." I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess rape  (sun-sentinel.com) (78)


Wed October 19, 2011
(CBS News) Ironic Study finds that President Obama "has suffered the most unrelentingly negative treatment" of all presidential candidates over the past five months. This is bad news for the 'liberal media'  (cbsnews.com) (95)
(Huffington Post) Misc Well, it's over. Wayne Newton has endorsed a GOP candidate  (huffingtonpost.com) (90)
(Some Guy) News French-Moroccan muslims arrested in San Antonio may have terror link after photographs of courthouses, water systems' from around the US found in the van. Nothing to see here, probably just some judgemental plumbers on holiday  (radio.woai.com) (114)
(I Heart Chaos) Amusing Forty four years ago this Friday, Abbie Hoffman and Allen Ginsberg tried exorcising and levitating the Pentagon. Man, the drugs were so much better in the late 60s  (iheartchaos.com) (66)


Tue October 18, 2011
(NPR) Unlikely Harold Camping says the world will end on Friday. This is not a repeat from May  (npr.org) (134)


Mon October 17, 2011
(Talking Points Memo) Ironic "Liberal" mainstream media covers Obama more negatively than any GOP candidate   (2012.talkingpointsmemo.com) (115)


Sun October 16, 2011
(Chicago Sun-Times) Florida If an Amtrak train departs from the west coast and arrives in Illinois with a Florida man carrying 45 pounds of pot, does it still warrant the Florida tag?  (napervillesun.suntimes.com) (38)
(Some Guy) Spiffy 23-year-old political candidate goes topless in her election video. "It was the best way to attract young voters" (Safe for work, sadly)  (forums.asiaone.com) (57)


Sat October 15, 2011
(Houston Chronicle) Unlikely GOP Presidential candidate Rick Perry's son is unemployed. And it's all Obama's fault, according to his mom  (blog.chron.com) (199)

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