Drew Curtis' FARK.com

Mon May 28, 2012

Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		Andy Rooney's WWII scoop from Nov 7th, 1944: The day Nazi 'robot rockets' almost bombed New York (usatoday.com)	(50)
(Some Guy)		Chances are, if you're growing a two foot tall marijuana plant in a pot outside your front door, you won't get a chance to smoke it (bradenton.com)	(52)
		Canadian hang-glider pilot says he's really sorry he dropped that poor tourist to her death, and he only swallowed the video evidence because his 12-year-old daughter stressed him out (dailymail.co.uk)	(65)
		In this day and age, the Golden Gate bridge would never be built, thanks to hipsters, enviro-nuts and Disney (mercurynews.com)	(67)
		Dick Winters, a true American hero, immortalized with a statue in Normandy. It's about damn time (pennlive.com)	(58)
		Apparently Best Korean officials are suffering from contagious and deadly "traffic accidents" (telegraph.co.uk)	(51)
		Police state that naked man eating another naked man's face is certainly a rare occurrence. "Other theories abounded, of course, sometimes leading to comparisons to one horror-movie staple, zombies" (miamiherald.com)	(44)
		Survey indicates women enjoy the best sex of their lives when they reach 28, men at 33. After that, it's all downhill (thesun.co.uk)	(148)
		As one of the only folks wearing clothing in the nudist resort, Hodges was easily spotted by deputies who arrested him at gunpoint after robbing two clerks at a nearby home improvement store and then stealing a golf cart (weblogs.sun-sentinel.com)	(34)
		If you have to cross the new San Francisco-Oakland Bay Bridge on a regular basis, you probably should not read this article (sacbee.com)	(73)
		Anonymous resident of one of New York's trendiest neighborhood puts notes on light poles informing tourists how to behave properly. And New Yorkers wonder why the rest of the country think they're elitist jerksnobs (poconorecord.com)	(157)
(Some Guy)		You know that sugar scrub you see offered on backpage? Turns out they are real things. Subby thought it was a euphemism for something else. Anyway, here's how you can put one together, maybe to give on Father's Day (thelook.today.msnbc.msn.com)	(32)
(Bellingham Herald)		Semi hauling toilet paper tips over on highway. Fark puns taken off the endangered species list (bellinghamherald.com)	(58)
(Some Guy)		In an effort to get more loyal customers, bar will serve you a free steak if you buy a drink worth $4 or more. Your dog wants in on the next pub crawl (dailytelegraph.com.au)	(46)
(Some Guy)		Not news: American flags displayed for Memorial Day. News: At Arlington National Cemetery. Awesome: 260,000 of them (fortstewart.patch.com)	(74)
		Photoshop this severe weather shelter (msnbcmedia.msn.com)	(27)
		Crimefighter who rides a chopper. In Afghanistan. And is a female. Don't mess with her (bbc.co.uk)	(76)
		Daily Show writer partners with Slate to crowdsource ideas for amending and rewriting the Constitution. Provide your ideas to the right (hive.slate.com)	(489)
		Canada's national archives is being dismantled and scattered, who needs to remember the history of the polar bear uprising anyway eh? (boingboing.net)	(166)
		Man disappears in Niagara Falls whirlpool; presumed to be spinning in his grave (thespec.com)	(63)

Sun May 27, 2012

	Woman swallows toothbrush while brushing her teeth. Surgeons remove it before Oral B becomes Anal B (upi.com)	(66)
	MSNBC Host Chris Hayes: I'm 'Uncomfortable' calling fallen military 'Heroes' (newsbusters.org)	(633)
	What do you REALLY know about the Queen? (dailymail.co.uk)	(156)
	A survey reveals that one-third of British pet owners would rather go away with their pet on vacation than their immediate family (upi.com)	(68)
	I'm thinking of using a non-sequitor to greet various people. I was thinking something like "Brother" or "Boss". Maybe "Man". What non-sequitors do you use or have used on you? (fark.com)	(366)
(Some Guy)	Photoshop this Passing President (whitehouse.gov)	(28)
	The Lord is just in all his ways: redlight runner who hit nun has iPhone stolen by passerby offering to phone police (thestar.com)	(69)
	Can you order top shelf hookers at the Travelodge? It's more likely than you think. (Not safe for workish) (thesun.co.uk)	(127)
	70 years ago today Czech partisans made Hitler very angry (bbc.co.uk)	(100)
	Newly upgraded to a tropical storm and now Beryling in on Southeast coast (cbsnews.com)	(81)
	Man tries, fails to buy meal at Denny's with $1 and bag of pot. You'd think if there was anywhere this offer would have been successful, it would have been Denny's (buffalonews.com)	(74)
	Photoshop this multicolored specimen having a snack (cdn4.spiegel.de)	(27)
(KETV)	Couple married for 65 years reveals secret of marital bliss: wearing matching outfits wherever they go (ketv.com)	(89)
	Behold a pale horse (nj.com)	(104)
(WAMU)	Maine soft-shell lobsters are in early this year. Marine biologists require more clarified butter to determine why (wamu.org)	(75)
	The Death List: Cars that aren't coming back for 2013. Subby will sob for Saab, the rest shall not be missed (autos.yahoo.com)	(294)
	Come listen to a story about a man named John / A poor farmer, barely kept his family fed / Then one day he was growin' up some food / And up from the ground came a bubblin' crude / Oil that is, black gold, Kansas tea (money.cnn.com)	(36)
	Reporter shows up too late to cover a sandstorm, tries to recreate it (metro.co.uk)	(30)
	How to be #1 SUPER-PATRIOT. USA USA USA USA (mentalfloss.com)	(131)
	If you don't like these amusing examples of passive aggressive behavior, than you can kindly piss off (dailymail.co.uk)	(86)
(Gulf News)	128 drivers fined for driving below speed limit. Obviously not in Florida (gulfnews.com)	(45)
	Hey dude, it's a holiday. I'm just going to sit around getting sconed (kansas.com)	(21)
	The paperclip was invented in 1899 and has never been improved upon since. It is, quite possibly, the perfect invention (slate.com)	(103)
	All whiskey tastes the same, just get the $5 bottle. There, THAT'S how you troll a whiskey thread. Or spell it whisky (chicagotribune.com)	(283)
	* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * (washingtonpost.com)	(198)
	Brazilians seek to lay NYC bare. Giggity (nypost.com)	(19)
	You're welcome, Class of 2012: Top 10 things no one tells high school graduates (ramblingbeachcat.com)	(245)
	Photoshop this corpulent crimefighter (inapcache.boston.com)	(24)
	"One dolla bid, now two, now two, will ya' give me two? Two dolla bid, now three, now three, will ya' give me three? Threedollathreedolla, going once...going twice...SOLD - to the evil banker scum in the plaid jacket" (thestar.com)	(80)
	More and more members of Generation Y are discovering that instead of having mom and dad pay for their rent each month, it makes more sense to have mom and dad buy them a house (couriermail.com.au)	(119)
	The $77 million cow pasture: "They were going to build a city. There should have been roads. There should have been homes. What do you see? A broken-down barn and a head of cattle" (miamiherald.com)	(70)
	Police officer breaks into neighbor's home to do laundry. Fails to make a clean getaway (metro.co.uk)	(30)
	Florida saved 61 children from death by abuse and neglect.... by narrowing its definitions of abuse and neglect (miamiherald.com)	(36)
	I have no idea what you're talking about, here's a senior citizen in a chair floating above the ground (cbc.ca)	(26)
	Memorial Day: how it's changed, and why some people think it should not be part of a three-day weekend (news.nationalgeographic.com)	(284)
	Born in Malaysia in 1923, after 3 years as a Japanese POW during WWII, 3 years fighting for the US Army in Korea, and an act of Congress to become a US citizen, he still says "every day is a holiday." He's also submitter's dad (nj.com)	(167)

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