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Sun September 20, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Major League Baseball) Weird Raise your hand if your team's top prospect hasn't been named the prime suspect in a murder case in the Dominican Republic. Not so fast, Giants fans  (mlb.mlb.com) (24)
(ESPN) Fail New AP rankings put Miami back in the top 10, USC not down far enough and the Buckeyes falling for winning. Other reasons the list fails to the right  (sports.espn.go.com) (163)
(Daily Herald) Dumbass Is America's favorite clubhouse cancer enjoying his first season in Chicago? "Not really... you understand why they haven't won in 100 years here." Obvious tag scratches itself from the headline  (dailyherald.com) (57)
(ESPN) Cool Will Jay Cutler bounce back at home against the Steelers? Can the Jets upset the Patriots? How many punts will hit that scoreboard? All this and more in your week 2 NFL discussion thread  (sports.espn.go.com) (4512)
(NASCAR) Obvious What do the Patriots, Red Sox, Yankees and Megan Fox have in common? Insta-green names like these still won't get a NASCAR Sylvania 300 Discussion Thread greenlit. Brett Favre  (nascar.com) (302)
(People Magazine) Dumbass While playing college basketball, L.A. Lakers forward Lamar Odom suffered from bouts of depression and low self esteem. So it should come as no surprise that he's marrying the wookie queen  (people.com) (72)
(Yahoo) Cool Trojans have their yearly accident  T-Shirt  (rivals.yahoo.com) (114)
(ESPN) Obvious 'Money' in the Bank: Mayweather defeats Marquez by unanimous decision  (espn.go.com) (66)

Sat September 19, 2009
(St. Petersburg Times) Interesting So if the Rays don't get a new stadium they say they'll leave Tampa? Um, you guys may want to read your stadium lease before hiring movers  (tampabay.com) (62)
(GB Press) Amusing Crab salad, lobster tail, bacon-wrapped tenderloin, and strawberries & whipped cream at my tailgate? It's more likely than you think  (greenbaypressgazette.com) (26)
(Yahoo) Fail Actual headline: "Five teams with playoff aspirations need a =E2=80=98W=E2=80=99." Must be one of those intangibles they keep talking about  (sports.yahoo.com) (20)
(ESPN) Spiffy Will Urban Meyer and Tebow of Nazareth make Lane Kiffin eat his words, or did the Vols learn from their mistakes in last week's suckfest against UCLA? All this and more in this week's college football thread  (espn.go.com) (2259)
(Daily Mail) Spiffy Will Chelsea or City finally drop points? Will Portsmouth finally get one? It's Chelsea v Spurs in a top four clash plus a highly anticipated Manchester Derby in this week's EPL thread  (dailymail.co.uk) (60)
(TSN) Obvious Leafs land Kessel as fans make plans for a Stanley Cup parade  (tsn.ca) (81)
(CNN) Fail Tennis player Ivo Karlovic serves a record 78 aces in one match. And loses  (sportsillustrated.cnn.com) (20)
(Sky News) Interesting English soccer fans submit their homemade entries for anthem that will be used by national team at 2010 World Cup, including "We Can Still Beat Canada - Maybe" and "At Least We're Not Cheering For Armoured Wankballers"  (news.sky.com) (46)

Fri September 18, 2009
(Wall Street Journal) Interesting Arkansas HS football coach ditches concept of punters and kickers, resulting in always going for it on 4th down, always going for 2, and always using the onside kickoff  (blogs.wsj.com) (71)
(Charlotte) Amusing Carolina Panters WR Steve Smith gives Jake Delhomme a pep talk after his 4-interception performance. Complete with "you're not a very handsome guy" and "I never liked you as a quarterback" (2:20 mark in video)  (blogs.charlotte.com) (63)
(CBS Sports) Interesting Sorry, Detroit, but you're stuck watching the Lions this Sunday  (cbssports.com) (40)
(Some Guy) Silly Cincinnati Reds will recreate one of the proudest moments in franchise history tomorrow. They're letting a Saint Bernard run around on the field prior to the game  (maryville.edu) (16)
(The Morning Call) Asinine Pennsylvania lawmakers still at odds over enacting a state budget witha $3 billion revenue shortfall, but there's always money to build an $80 million arena for a minor league hockey team that will only pay 20 percent of the cost  (mcall.com) (42)
(CBS Sports) Obvious "The biggest reason Mayweather isn't thought of highly is because he's a jackass."  (cbssports.com) (47)
(Boston Globe) Asinine NY Jets continue to trash talk in advance of their game against the Patriots this week? Surely you J-E-S-T JEST JEST JEST  (boston.com) (133)
(Kansas City) Spiffy With 10-seconds left in the game and his team down 46-0, high school football coach puts in his secret weapon- A 15-year old freshman with Down Syndrome. Opposing team lets him score a 65-yard touchdown. (with link to video)  (kansascity.com) (182)
(Yahoo) Stupid Spokesman for NBA referees' union says lockout appears imminent. Now where will the league find people willing to bend over backwards to help LA, Boston, and Cleveland win?  (sports.yahoo.com) (43)
(The Scotsman) Cool Golf widow gets revenge on former husband by getting two holes-in-one on same round, dancing on her husband's grave with golf spikes  (news.scotsman.com) (22)
(CBC) Obvious Toronto Maple Leafs continue their long tradition of being Stanley Cup contenders in preseason, expected to post usual 6-76 record when the games actually start to mean something  (cbc.ca) (140)
(AZCentral) Hero High school football team snaps a 66-game losing streak. Wins for the first time since 2002  (azcentral.com) (37)
(LA Times) Dumbass In a fitting tribute to dead golfers, man hurls thousands of golf balls in National Park. Payne Stewart is flattered, but confused  (latimesblogs.latimes.com) (20)
(AP) Asinine After 90 minutes of deliberation, jury acquits Kentucky high school football coach of killing 15-year-old player in gassers in 94-degree weather  (kirotv.com) (63)
(Bizjournals.com) Ironic Obama stimulus to help build Rockies, D-backs stadium  (phoenix.bizjournals.com) (17)
(Major League Baseball) Hero Ernie Harwell says his goodbyes to Tigers fans. That subby has spent the evening cutting onions should go without saying (with video)  (mlb.mlb.com) (35)

Thu September 17, 2009
(mlive.com) Fail Charles Rogers found passed out in a running car; Lions offense still missing  (mlive.com) (21)
(YouTube) Dumbass Chad Ochocinco: "Losing my Twitter and losing my Ustream, it's just as tough and emotional for me as losing my Johnson."  (bareknucks.com) (24)
(Some Guy) Fail Junior Seau now desperately looking to gravy train his way into a Super Bowl ring, by telling the Patriots to call him in December, but only if they are poised for a deep playoff run  (nfl.fanhouse.com) (38)
(Yahoo) Silly Roger Federer fined $1500 for profanity at US Open. Yeah, like he really gives a shiat  (news.yahoo.com) (33)
(London Times) Interesting Formula One cheating scandal heats up as Renault team states it "will not dispute" charges that one of their drivers was asked to crash his car on purpose to help his teammate Fernando Alonso win the Grand Prix  (timesonline.co.uk) (45)
(CTV) Obvious Apparently being outed as a hermaphrodite to the entire world can be stressful. Ric Romero has more at 11  (ctv.ca) (48)
(NHL) Cool Best. Porn. Name. Ever  (sharks.nhl.com) (192)
(ESPN) Obvious Marquez "unfazed by underdog status". Well what did you expect him to say? "Yes, I'm the weaker fighter, and I fully expect to leave the ring on a gurney"?  (sports.espn.go.com) (24)
(Wall Street Journal) Silly Wall Street Journal asks, "What's the point of cheerleading?" Um, maybe, er, leading the cheers?  (online.wsj.com) (59)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Duke s...hows off shirtless bods for football poster  (sportsbybrooks.com) (14)
(Wall Street Journal) Spiffy In an uncertain world, sports offers something solid to hold on to: Clear and understandable rules. Except, of course, for the silly rouge in Canadian football  (online.wsj.com) (22)
(ESPN) Spiffy Vince Young surprises Steve McNair's sons by showing up for their school's dad's day breakfast  (sports.espn.go.com) (67)
(Philly) Followup That guy whose toddler threw back the foul ball? He's a lifelong Phillies fan and that was his first foul ball catch ever  (philly.com) (46)
(Wall Street Journal) Caption Caption this gazing goalie  (s.wsj.net) (59)
(NBC Sports) Obvious Agents have been telling players to avoid signing with the Cleveland Browns like the team has the plague or Eric Mangini  (profootballtalk.nbcsports.com) (23)
(camelclutchblog.com) Unlikely Ric Flair signs three-year deal to wrestle Hulk Hogan. Wrestlers will now hit each other with their walkers until somebody breaks a hip  T-Shirt  (camelclutchblog.com) (51)
(New York Daily News) Obvious Mets find another way to lose. That's like saying the sun will rise in the East tomorrow  (nydailynews.com) (14)
(Fox Sports) Fail Proving yet again her innate ability to pick winners, Kendra Wilkinson's husband Hank Baskett gets released from the Eagles to make way for Michael Vick  (msn.foxsports.com) (88)
(670 The Score) Dumbass Ochocinco plans to do the Lambeau Leap when he scores in Green Bay, where they don't really have a great sense of humor  (670thescore.stats.com) (86)
(LAist) Ironic Karaoke song used to torture sober people now torments Steve Perry, forces him to leave Dodger Stadium early like the rest of LA fans  (laist.com) (22)
(Yahoo) Unlikely Two weeks into the season, and it's already time for Heisman speculation  (rivals.yahoo.com) (32)
(CBS 4 Denver) Obvious John Elway thinks Kyle Orton will get better with time. Subby is thinking the year 2094 will do it  (cbs4denver.com) (32)
(Wall Street Journal) Unlikely Not News: Favre's Vikings jersey is #1 seller. Fark: In 19 states. What the Fark?: Including Wisconsin  (online.wsj.com) (36)
(Yahoo) Florida Florida high school coach denies intentionally running up score on opponents in 83-0 victory, claims other team just sucked, really really sucked, as in like Oakland Raiders level of suckage  (highschool.rivals.com) (48)
(ESPN) Obvious If you had "Week 1" in your "How long will it take T.O. to throw his QB under the bus" office pool, step forward and claim your prize  (espn.go.com) (47)
(Some Guy) Amusing The best review for EA Sports' NHL '10 you will read. Ever  (downgoesbrown.com) (60)

Wed September 16, 2009
(ESPN) Obvious Jesse Carlson suspended 4 games for doing something 99.9% of all Americans would like to do  (sports.espn.go.com) (74)
(USA Today) Sad Cancer (No. 1) defeats Myles Brand (No. 15)  (usatoday.com) (18)
(Chicago Sun-Times) Obvious White Sox: Don't let the door hit you in the Colon on the way out  (suntimes.com) (20)
(MSNBC) Cool American short track speedskater JR Celski to begin rehab after slicing his leg open in race accident. His rehab will be overseen by a Dr. Eric Heiden, whoever that happens to be  (nbcsports.msnbc.com) (19)
(TSN) Strange Alexandre Picard scores in losing cause as Columbus loses pre-season opener to Penguins  (tsn.ca) (84)
(Chicago Tribune) Asinine Chicago Parks District does not want statue of Walter Payton placed outside of Soldier Field, saying it would "diminish" the stature of other Bears hall-of-famers. Or maybe they just don't want a bronze reminder of the Glory Days  (chicagotribune.com) (85)
(Boston Herald) Amusing Sometime during last night's Yankee game they all decided to play Hockey....clearing both benches and the bullpens  (bostonherald.com) (179)
(Buffalo News) Amusing Bills cornerback Leodis McKelvin's lawn vandalized after MNF loss. "The vandalism apparently consisted of the score - 25-24 - and a graphic depiction of the male anatomy scrawled in white paint"  (buffalonews.com) (114)
(TampaBays10.com) Hero What would any red-blooded american man do with a $17 million lottery payout? A) Move to Tampa B) Start a TV show C) Get together a group of hot chicks who wrestle or D) all of the above?  (wtsp.com) (39)
(My Fox DC) Video The cutest video of a little girl throwing back the foul ball her father just caught and handed her  (myfoxdc.com) (93)
(WTMJ) Asinine Boy with eye/skin disorder has to wear NFL-approved Jim McMahon tinted shield to play football. Shield breaks federal law because boy forgot to wear Rozelle headband  (620wtmj.com) (85)
(Washington Post) Fail "Cliff, I'm really happy for you, and I'm gonna let you get your complete game shutout, but the Nats are having the worst year of all time."  (washingtonpost.com) (35)
(Some Atheist) Spiffy 3 teens suing a New Jersey ballpark after being ejected for not standing during 'god Bless America'  (postchronicle.com) (119)
(670 The Score) Spiffy Jake Peavy makes return right in time for Sox to be eliminated from contention  (670thescore.stats.com) (9)
(Free Press) Sad Farewell tributes to Ernie Harwell to take place during Wednesday's Tigers game and Sunday's Lions game  (freep.com) (29)
(670 The Score) Followup Finally the NFL gets around to talking to Eric Man-genius about his knowledge of the Jets coverup of Favre's injury last year. They know he knows all about video tape evidence  (670thescore.stats.com) (24)
(Google) Obvious Michael Vick no longer has to make passes at ball boys  (google.com) (65)

Tue September 15, 2009
(CBC) Asinine Olympics says their sponsors' rights trump your free speech rights, and they'll have roving thugs on hand to convince you  (cbc.ca) (59)
(ESPN) Interesting Some NFL power rankings for you to argue over. And once you see who's at 2, 4, and 5, you will argue  (espn.go.com) (154)
(Some Guy) Ironic Soldier Field must be completely re-sodded after U-2 concert. How big is your carbon footprint now, Bono?  (chicagobreakingnews.com) (60)
(670 The Score) Sad Mike Hampton to miss all of 2010 with injury. In 2005 when he was expected to miss the 2006 season, he also missed the 2007 season. See you for the presidential election  (670thescore.stats.com) (27)
(ESPN) Interesting Dice-K and his 8.23 ERA making first start in three months tonight against the Angels  (sports.espn.go.com) (66)
(BBC) Unlikely Kim Cjisters only beat Serena because she was doping...on Pregnancy hormones  (news.bbc.co.uk) (21)
(Yahoo) Interesting After a respectable Monday night showing, it may be that the only joke about Raiders this year is their fans  (sports.yahoo.com) (153)
(USA Today) Amusing Jeff Garcia returns to the Sweathogs... I mean, Philadelphia Eagles. Welcome back  (usatoday.com) (48)
(ESPN) Asinine $even Native American$ file law$uit claiming the Wa$hington Red$kin$ name is offen$ive to them  (sports.espn.go.com) (294)
(Some Guy) Spiffy AC Milan. Barca. Porto. Chelsea. Liverpool. Champions League 2009 / 2010 is here  (uefa.com) (92)
(ESPN) Unlikely ESPN columnist acknowledges Tom Brady and the New England Patriots looked horrible on Monday night, miracle comeback or not  (espn.go.com) (187)
(ESPN) Interesting Del Potro stuns Federer. Suck it, lobs  (sports.espn.go.com) (55)
(Yahoo) Fail Bills allow 11 4th quarter points in 76 seconds, drop MNF opener to Patriots 25-24. This is not a repeat of the Cleveland game last year, or the Dallas game the year before  (sports.yahoo.com) (100)

Mon September 14, 2009
(Some Injured Guys) Followup With 2 QB's injured at Carolina Sunday, A.J. Feeley signs with... the Panthers? Jeff Garcia nods approvingly  (csnphilly.com) (44)
(YouTube) Fail Video of the Chicago Bears setting the epic fail bar for the 2009 NFL season with a fake punt. Come for the failure of the Duke-educated longsnapper, stay for the ref caught on camera laughing at the Bears at 0:17  (youtube.com) (84)
(ESPN) Spiffy Tom Brady and Terrell Owens (and 20 other guys) are taking the field tonight. This is your MNF thread  (espn.go.com) (1923)
(Sportsnet) Spiffy NHL pre-season begins at 7:30 PT with the Canucks and Islanders, offers hope to Farkers suffering baseball threads  (sportsnet.ca) (156)
(ESPN) Amusing Serena Williams does NOT wish to be the Kanye West Of Tennis  (sports.espn.go.com) (66)
(FanNation) Sad After taking it to the Packers last night, the Bears recieve the best news ever. Wait, what's the opposite of both of those?  (fannation.com) (415)
(ESPN) Cool NFL players vow to donate brains for research. Scientists assure players that they will have them back in time for playoffs  (sports.espn.go.com) (25)
(NFL.com) Strange Indianapolis Colts WR Anthony Gonzalez out 2-6 weeks with knee injury after getting tackled by the 27-yard line (w/ video)  (nfl.com) (48)
(USA Today) Amusing Without TO at his disposal, Dallas Cowboys QB Tony Romo sputters. No, not really... he threw for a career-high 353 yards and three TDs  (usatoday.com) (242)
(670 The Score) Cool CY Sabathia wins league-leading 17th for Yankees  (670thescore.stats.com) (139)
(AJC) Amusing When your league's playoff games get bumped by Elmo and Cookie Monster, perhaps it's time to admit you don't have a real sport  (ajc.com) (49)
(YouTube) Video The sickest tennis shot you'll see all year  (youtube.com) (150)
(ESPN) Cool Johnny Whonitas? Peyton ties Colts franchise win record  (sports.espn.go.com) (49)
(Wall Street Journal) Hero Kim Clijsters - an unseeded, wild-card entrant, coming out of retirement, and a new mom - wins the US Open  (blogs.wsj.com) (95)

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