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Sun January 11, 2009
(East Valley Tribune) Spiffy NFC Championship goes through Arizona. This is not a repeat from... well, this is not a repeat (166)
(Google) Obvious MLB getting around illegal drug ban by having its players diagnosed with ADHD (19)
(ESPN) Obvious Tim Tebow proves how good of an NFL QB he will be by balking at the chance of becoming one this year (80)
(AP) Amusing Pacman: "I might be back in Dallas in 2009." Yeah, maybe to pick up his last paycheck (33)
(ESPN) Asinine Has the NFL extended the play clock to 42 Seconds? Is a QB allowed to step out of bounds and continue the play? Quoth the NFL: forevermore (84)
(SFGate) Followup Yesterday's story that the 49ers want to share their new stadium with the Raiders? Yeah, not so much (14)
(ESPN) Interesting Pedro Martinez in negotiations to be on the Florida Marlins DL in 2009 (7)
(ESPN) Stupid Chicago Bears sign the captain of the Titanic to lead their defensive line to greatness (35)
(NFL.COM) Cool Your Sunday NFL playoffs - Chargers/Steelers, Eagles/Giants. Who will advance to their respective Championship round? For level headed commentary, and possible drunken ramblings, click to the right (3461)
(The News & Observer (NC)) Interesting Not News: High school girls want to get hot and sweaty with boys. News: On the wrestling mat. Fark: The boys want none of it (68)
(Sports by Brooks) Stupid Fans in India are building a religious temple devoted to cricket player. No word if statue will be modeled after relief carvings of Brett Favre recently unearthed in Peter King's backyard (5)
(YouTube) Video Syracuse point guard Jonny Flynn reserves his table at the NBA draft with the nastiest cross-over and sickest dunk you'll see all year (82)
(News.com.au) Sad Australian Open referees will double as fashion police to stamp out skimpy outfits at the tennis competition (9)
(Some Guy) Obvious Arizona Cardinals advance to NFC Championship game; Peter King, drunk on Matt Cassell's jockstrap, still insists the Patriots are the the 3rd best team in the NFL (52)
(AZCentral) Spiffy The bandwagon for the Arizona Cardinals forms on the right (85)

Sat January 10, 2009
(ESPN) Asinine Titans lose to Ravens, rift in the space/time continuum (110)
(Sports by Brooks) Unlikely 49ers' desperation ploy to save nearly "defunct" new stadium deal? Proposing sharing stadium with the Raiders (23)
(Some Guy) Obvious U.S. finally beats Canada in international hockey. Girl's hockey. Specifically, under-18 girl's hockey. U.S. team looking forward to beating the Leafs 29-0 in an exhibition game (22)
(ESPN) Cool Can the Ravens uphend the Titans? Does anyone give the Cardinals a chance on the East Coast? Your Saturday NFL divisional round discussion thread (3356)
(Major League Baseball) Sad Former Padres, Astros, Tigers, Cubs, Giants, Pirates, Mariners, and Mets player Dave Roberts is now with the Angels (23)
(MSNBC) Weird Hockey's gotten weird (45)
(ESPN) Followup Memphis Grizzlies to Portland Trail Blazers: "Screw you" (64)
(Yahoo) Amusing Red Sox continue to mismanage funds, spend $5 to get a Penny (67)
(Some Guy) Sad State-wide high school athlete steroid testing costs $6 million and nets four positive results out of 10,000 tested, and the program may continue (51)
(Fox Sports) Cool King James excommunicates the Celts (78)
(CNN) Obvious FSU's Bobby Bowden planning on challenging JoePa to see who can die on the football field first (21)
(FanNation) Amusing Five worst sports broadcasting duos. Apparently, some see Joe Morgan's tendency to call the Cubs out for sucking as a negative (109)
(Sports by Brooks) Interesting Al-Jazeera looking to change perception of network by acquiring broacast rights to English Premier League soccer (18)
(ESPN) Obvious South Carolina's football program just got a lot less Smelley (14)

Fri January 09, 2009
(BBC) Obvious Liverpool manager Rafa Benitez, with his team at the top of the Premier League, does his best imitation of Kevin Keegan circa 1996. No word yet on whether he would love it if United win the title (46)
(NYPost) Unlikely Pedro wants back on the Mets and a spot in the rotation for a chance to get hurt and placed on IR again (8)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing ESPN's syndicated "Mike and Mike" morning radio show now the highest-rated sports show in Chicago. Local columnist: "Shame on all of us" (70)
(Yahoo) Followup NBA to Portland Trail Blazers: "How about a nice, big cup of STFU?" (33)
(TSN) Obvious Maple Leafs Grabovski suspended 3 games for his latest hissy fit, lack of talent (44)
(Yahoo) Sad There haven't been this many Redskins wiped out since the Battle of Little Bighorn (43)
(JSOnline) Interesting Moss in talks to come to Oakland Raiders. No, this is not a repeat from 2005 (17)
(Yahoo) Amusing NBA fan blows loud whistle causing most players to stop and home team to get wide-open dunk (60)
(Wall Street Journal) Interesting Explaining the play that gets the NY Giants so many yards, the counter run, which, surprisingly, depends on a really fast white guy for its success (48)
(Yahoo) Interesting Chicago Cubs finalize $30M deal with Milton Bradley. Yahtzee! (30)
(CNN) Dumbass Portland Trail Blazers send email to every team in the NBA and threaten to sue their ass if they sign Darius Miles and let him play for more than one game this season which would cost them 18 million dollars (64)
(9 News) Amusing Bill "Roid Rage" Romanowski sends Broncos owner a long PowerPoint presentation on why he should be their new head coach (39)
(ESPN) Obvious So much for all that split National Championship talk. Florida and Utah are your top 2 seeds in the last AP poll (153)
(ESPN) Amusing UFC star Rampage Jackson pleads guilty to going on a . . . um, well, for engaging in violent or excited behavior that is reckless, uncontrolled, or destructive (52)
(OSG Sports) Audio Do not cross Tim Brando with that weak s***, sir (14)
(ESPN) Florida Gators win BCS Title Game. Bob Stoops still eating his Cheerios off a plate  T-Shirt (245)

Thu January 08, 2009
(Some Sneaker Fiend) Asinine Michael Jordan officially unveils his latest "reason for kids to shoot each other for overpriced sneakers" piece (tag is for Suggested Retail Price) (108)
(AJC) Followup Larry Jones is pretty peeved at Braves management for letting John Smoltz go to the Boston Red Sox (35)
(CNN) Obvious And so it begi... uh, continues (38)
(Rivals) Cool Tonight's BCS National Championship game discussion thread. Nine months of nothing after this game? Noooooooo (2569)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Legacy-minded Big 10 President, once a staunch supporter of the BCS, now sounds like Pontius Pilate administering over college football's Dark Age: "I am not the face of the BCS" (27)
(Sports by Brooks) Stupid Teen arrested at high school basketball game for flipping off the crowd (25)
(Sports by Brooks) Asinine World's top four golfers blow off first PGA Tour event of the season. The best part: Tiger Woods gets $65,000 for not playing (19)
(CBS Sports) Unlikely Is Tim Tebow the greatest college football player of all time? (220)
(ESPN) Dumbass Brewers sign Trevor Hoffman to blow ninth inning leads (39)
(AJC) Interesting Braves pitcher John Smoltz to sign with Red Sox (135)
(MSNBC) Sad Former Buffalo Bills quaterback Jack Kemp diagnosed with cancer. There's an OJ Simpson joke in here somewhere (24)
(Dallas News) Followup Pacman plans to sue ESPN, or at least hire someone to do something about them (65)
(Yahoo) Asinine "Dear Coach Jagodzinski, Good look on the job search, we hope everything works out with you and the Jets. Oh, and by the way, you're fired." (60)
(NYPost) Cool Finally a slide-show we can all get behind: "Wild" NY athlete wives (42)
(New York Daily News) Amusing Mets newest baserunner runs the bases at record speed in CitiField, gets called out when she does a number 1 in the Jackie Robinson Rotunda (15)
(The Sun) Scary Manchester United's Cristiano Ronaldo totals his $225,000 Ferarri, but is luckily able to dive out of harm's way (16)
(Fox Sports) Fail What do Billy Graham and the Boston Celtics have in common? They both have ability to make entire arena of people stand up and shout "Jesus Christ" (41)
(ESPN) Interesting Someone stole the glasses off the bronze statue of Penn State football coach Joe Paterno. They'll soon learn that they've messed with the wrong 187-year-old (13)
(CNN) Interesting Brett Favre tells the media he's upset with his Jets teammates bashing him, then retreats to his private office and locker room to brood alone (35)
(Mojo In The Morning) Video Top Ten Worst Acting Performances by Athletes (73)
(ESPN) Amusing Less than a week after Gary Williams whined about not being ranked, Maryland loses at home to something called Morgan State (29)
(London Times) Obvious "There is absolutely nothing remotely sexy about rugby players. Nothing at all" (34)
(AL.com) Obvious ESPN exec is proud of current slate of 34 college football bowl games, declares there will be no playoff system as long as he's in charge of the sport (98)
(Sports by Brooks) Obvious As Israeli army occupies Gaza, Israeli pro hoops team plays a game in Islamic Turkey. Well, you know the rest (14)

Wed January 07, 2009
(Yahoo) Unlikely Tennessee Titans QB Kerry Collins expresses a desire to be a woman (25)
(Some Guy) Obvious Percentage of Cowboys who do not resemble Pacman: 100% (49)
(ESPN) Interesting Cleveland Browns replace former Belichick assistant with ... former Belichick assistant (63)
(Some Guy) Dumbass There's only one way to celebrate an 0-16 season: With a tattoo (41)
(Some Guy) Amusing If you'd like your expensive car not to wind up full of buttered popcorn, it's best not to piss off your team's veterans (with delicious video goodness) (19)
(Detroit News) Dumbass How does Tonya Harding celebrate her 15th anniversary of beating down Nancy Kerrigan? Why with a cage fight of course (32)
(CBS Miami) Cool FSU/USF to play in Palindrome Bowl (49)
(ESPN) Obvious Former AL MVP Jason Giambi returning to Oakland for a one year deal, unlimited In-N-Out burger (94)
(Guardian.com) Obvious "The Chicago Blackhawks and their fans are at the forefront of what can rightly be described as the resurgence of hockey in the United States. There are many teams in the league that would do well to follow their example" (148)
(Sports by Brooks) Weird Lakers' Jordan Farmar leery of lascivious ladies. It got so bad during his UCLA days that he had to move off-campus (38)
(Hartford Courant) Cool Woman finds 139 year old baseball card, along with gum hard enough to cut a diamond (110)
(YouTube) Stupid There's no biting in hockey (66)
(Yahoo) Obvious Yankees sign Leigh Teixeira to 8-year, $180 million deal (107)
(Some Guy) Obvious What do Dale Earnhardt Sr. and Pink Floyd have in common? Their last big hit was the wall (71)
(BBC) Dumbass Today's international cricket news: England captain Kevin Pieterson and coach Peter Moores settle their public differences by getting themselves fired. Both men said to be feeling stumped (13)
(Baltimore Sun) Weird For some reason World Baseball Classic hero Koji Uehara left the richest and most succesful team in Japan to sign a two-year deal with the Orioles (29)
(ESPN) Misc Boston College to fire Jeff Jagodzinski, plan to hire someone with easier-to-spell name (39)
(The Wiz of Odds) Video It all looks so easy from the comfort of your sofa, but getting that yellow first-down line on your TV screen is an involved process (63)

Tue January 06, 2009
(ESPN) Dumbass Utah's Attorney General is considering bringing an anti-trust lawsuit against the BCS. Because there's no crime in Utah for him to... wait... is there crime in Utah? (85)
(Sports by Brooks) Interesting The cable TV ratings are out for 2008, and ESPN's sports media monopoly may be over sooner than you think (62)
(CNN) Obvious Cleveland Indians sign Carl Pavano to their disabled list for 2009 season (37)
(KGTV) Stupid Chargers trying their best to become Bengals West (49)
(Washington Post) Fail Bode Miller continues to find ways to lose ski races, now by getting kicked out of events because of illegal equipment (29)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Former longtime Chicago Cub "can't understand" why he keeps getting passed over for the Hall of Fame. This is not a repeat (75)
(YouTube) Obvious You don't tug on Superman's cape. You don't spit into the wind. You don't pull the mask off that old lone ranger, and you don't talk trash to Tebow before the championship game (91)
(Mirror.co.uk) Dumbass Sergio Garcia takes full responsibility for the Ryder Cup loss. Just kidding, he blames the showers, the captain and Padraig Harrington (22)
(Yahoo) Amusing If your college team can't make layups, do you a)Make them run laps b)Bench them or c)Take a 12 year old out of the stands and put him in the game (12)
(ESPN) Asinine J.C. Romero, relief pitcher for the World Champion Phillies, receives 50 day suspension for taking a vitamin. Fark needs a Bud Selig tag (67)
(NYPost) Obvious Yankees' obscene payroll is putting the squeeze on the bottom line. A million tiny violins explode (48)
(Independent) Dumbass What do you do if you sell a player for £10m one year ago? If you're Tottenham, you buy him back for £15m and throw a big parade (21)
(Sports Business Journal) Unlikely NFL Network will merge with media company, NCAA will expand the tournament to 96 teams, and World Series games will start earlier. These and other Sports Predictions Sure To Be Wrong for 2009 (77)
(Charleston Daily Mail) Scary Toughman contest draws the best of the best. "I've always wanted to do this, but I've been pregnant my entire adult life" (19)
(USA Today) Interesting Shaquille O'Neal's house value has dropped by his free throw percentage (17)
(ESPN) Misc Roethlisberger says he expects to recover from his latest concussion in time to get another concussion this Sunday playing against the Chargers (106)
(Examiner) Misc Milton Bradley signs $30,000,000 deal with Cubs, Rich Uncle Pennybags demands Community Chest cards be adjusted for inflation (83)
(Yahoo) Fail Texas defeats Ohio State in the Fiesta Bowl on last-second TD. Tag is for the Big Ten Conference (246)
(ESPN) Amusing Bucs' newly promoted Defensive coordinator in talks for head coaching position--for Denver. Duke sucks at job interviews (16)

Mon January 05, 2009
(Canoe) Dumbass Don Cherry defends fighting in hockey at the funeral of a hockey player who died in a hockey fight. Stay classy, Grapes (66)
(ESPN) Misc Scott Pioli meeting with Chiefs to discuss GM position, truckload of money (21)
(Sports by Brooks) Fail Pittsburgh-based mining company signs $85M naming rights deal for NHL Penguins arena then promptly lays off all 260 Pittsburgh-area miners three weeks later (25)
(This is Gloucestershire) Sappy Puma creates specially made goal keeping gloves for young goalkeeper born with only two fingers and a thumb on each hand, then quickly devours him before he can waddle off (19)
(USA Today) Sad Twins owner Carl Pohlad dies, still no word on whether or not he left the team to his grandson (35)
(CBS Sports) Interesting Mack Brown says something totally relevant about something. This link is in no way a paper thin excuse for a Fiesta Bowl game thread (1349)
(ESPN) Obvious Big East takes nine of the top 22 spots in the latest college basketball poll. Duke sucks and so does your favorite conference (49)
(Riverfront Times) Video MVP contender Kurt Warner attempts to draw God. And it's not a pretty picture. OMG (62)
(Major League Baseball) Weird Pat Burrell turns down $22 million from the Champion Philadelphia Phillies so that he can test free agency. So he signs for the Tampa Bay Rays, the team that lost the World Series, for $16 million. Oh, I see what you di--er, no I don't (72)
(Telegraph) Dumbass Not news: Spanish referee issues 19 red cards. Fark: in one game (13)
(Sports by Brooks) Dumbass After Raiders deny his report that a portion of the Oakland franchise is being sold, ESPN's Chris Mortensen responds with, "The Raiders have lost the privilege with me of running stories past them for comment" (24)
(Some Guy) Interesting We all know Shawn Kemp has 11 illegitimate kids by 9 women, but have you ever wondered how many other athletes have? Here's the most comprehensive list of athletes with illegitimate kids you'll ever see (78)
(ESPN) Spiffy Who's the baddest motherfarker in the NFL? Thrity Helens agree that Pittsburgh linebacker James Harrison is the baddest motherfarker in the NFL (78)
(Newsday) Obvious Matt Millen hired by NBC for Super Bowl coverage, oversight of "Knight Rider" (43)
(TSN) Spiffy Canada takes on Sweden for gold tonight at the World Junior Hockey Championship Final. Trash talk, knowledgable analysis & wild speculative conjecture all welcome to the right (186)
(IndyStar) Obvious After yet another playoff flop, city of Indianapolis would like nothing more than for Coach Dungy to pack his bags and hit the road (132)
(AP) Spiffy Samurai horseback archery contests becoming increasingly popular as Japanese feel RenFests are too childish (23)
(NHL Network) Obvious Sport-specific TV channels ranked. MLB Network ranks first after less than a week, while NHL Network still looks to be produced in a broom closet (36)
(ESPN) Amusing Lebron's response to being called for traveling in the final seconds of a loss to the wizards?: "That's my trademark play, you can't call that" (81)
(National Football Post) Unlikely Al Davis may sell part of the Raiders, move to Los Angeles, re-hire John Madden, draft anyone not named Robert Gallery (15)
(Deadspin) Interesting "If the NFC hadn't sent Rex Grossman and Co. to try and stop him that year, Peyton Manning is Dan Marino with better acting chops" (91)
(Chicago Tribune) Misc New MLB network shows some early potential, though if it's anything like baseball it will cost too much to watch and will get boring after 30 minutes (14)
(Philly) Spiffy Eagles owner wants Reid and McNabb back. In other news, Eagles wide receiver Hank Baskett has a really hot fiancé (25)
(ESPN) Obvious Old and busted: media prematurely fellating USC. New hotness: media prematurely fellating Florida (50)
(Oregon Live) Spiffy The Beavers' 21 straight losses breeds malice / The USC Trojans played callous / the crowd lets out a call / "Just like football" / USC fails again in Corvallis (15)
(Daily Mail) Unlikely Golfers who use titanium clubs may be going deaf because they create a "sonic boom" when they connect with the ball (28)
(Yahoo) Obvious After the Yankees and Mets go on huge spending sprees, the New York legislature starts to rethink the whole public financing of their new stadiums (22)
(ESPN) Spiffy Portland State defeats Northern Arizona in four overtimes. Because five would have just been excessive (15)
(Some Guy) Cool Green Bay Packers fire defensive coordinator Sanders. Last seen carrying 11 herbs and spices, headed for Kentucky (26)
(Yahoo) Amusing Celtics continue their magical run at the NBA single-season win record by losing to the Knicks (57)
(Boston Globe) Interesting Unranked BC upsets #1 North Carolina. Duke sucks (31)

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