Drew Curtis' FARK.com -- Sports Archives for '2008-11-30 23:59:59'

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Sun November 30, 2008

		Okla. jumped Texas in BCS to earn berth in Big 12 title game because Longhorns coach didn't vote his own team No. 1. Two voters voted OU No. 1. The result? The Sooners edged Texas in the coaches poll ... by one vote	(43)
		Browns lose starting QB for season in second straight week, courageously look to Ken Dorsey to right the ship	(20)
		Big 12 sweeps the nominations for the college footballs best QB, WR, and TE awards. Where is your God now, SEC fan?	(55)
		Can the Giants handle the 'Skins? Will the Steelers survive the Pats? Will anyone pay attention to K.C. at Oakland? All this and more as we continue with Week 13 in the NFL	(1429)
		It's the most dreaded day in English football - the FA Cup third round draw	(20)
		Plaxico Burress could face felony charges for nightclub gun incident, making transfer to the Raiders imminent	(59)
		The world's richest soccer clubs, plus Arsenal, all play each other today. It's your Sunday English Premiership discussion forum	(100)
		Where is your SEC now? ACC goes 3-1 against God's conference on Saturday	(81)

Sat November 29, 2008

	Not news: Knicks score 82 points. News: In the first half. Fark: After trading their top two scorers for cap space	(35)
(Some Guy)	So who did Olympic hero Michael Phelps take home to meet his mom for Thanksgiving this year? If you said a tattooed stripper bartender from Vegas who has a habit of appearing topless in photos, then collect your prize (with sfw pics)	(71)
	Reason #40 for why Obama didn't win GA: UGA fans don't like change. GT beats UGA for the first time in 8 years	(70)
	You were this year's Mr. Irrelevant. Good news: You get to start on Sunday. Bad news: It's for the Rams	(19)
	Plaxico Burress finally does something to make Tom Coughlin happy and shoots himself	(99)
	Raleigh high school students start Quidditch league. Nerds	(23)
	Alabama/Auburn, Oklahoma/Oklahoma St, Georgia/Georgia Tech, Oregon/Oregon St and so much more as Rivalry Saturday finally arrives	(1530)
(Some Guy)	LeBron James on Charles Barkley: "He's stupid. That's all I've got to say about that." Barkley: "If I was LeBron James, I would shut the hell up." CATFIGHT	(48)
	Konichiwa, Junichi son... Red Sox close to landing another top Japanese pitcher	(33)
	"Whenever you say NASCAR -- or the World Series of Poker, for that matter -- isn't a sport, you are simply wrong"	(143)
	Now that we're talkin' about the game, the actual game, when it matters...Allen Iverson comes off the bench and leads the Pistons in points and assists on the way to a win over the Milwaukee Bucks	(13)
	ASU scores four defensive touchdowns to beat UCLA 34-9. Who needs offense?	(18)
	Beautiful $6 million tutoring center at the University of Illinois, complete with oriental rugs and leather chairs, is only for use by less than 1.5% of the students. If you guessed atheletes, step up to claim your prize	(206)

Fri November 28, 2008

	"Soo, Tyler... What else did you do on Thanksgiving Day besides helping the team win at the Maui Invitational?" "Oh you know, nothin' much. Guy had a seizure on the plane. Deon and I helped. No biggie."	(18)
	Team bus for high school football team in suburban Seattle overturns. Seahawks upgrade, sign most of the injured players	(6)
	Yankees offer largest contract ever to a pitcher: 42,553,191 McDonalds Big Macs to CC Sabathia	(25)
	Charles Barkley: "I want to ask (ESPN's) Stephen A. Smith if it tastes like chicken. Because he has his head so far up LeBron's a$$." (with audio)	(27)
	Robin Lopez plays in the NBA, sleeps with stuffed animals (with pic)	(11)
	In bid to create new winter sport, Canadian construction workers invent downhill-ski-capable mountain bike kit	(5)
	These days, NFL rookies are spending months preparing for their touchdown dances	(14)
	Lane Kiffin to learn the lyrics to "Rocky Top"	(29)
	Steelers re-sign running back Najeh Davenport, immediately name him No. 2 on depth chart	(20)
(The Big Lead)	Chad Ocho Cinco shows up at a Best Buy at 5:25am to buy Rock Band 2. Stores apparently already sold out of Bengals suck remover (pic)	(24)
	Stephon Marbury suspended by NY Knicks for one game, told to stay away from the team until Monday and gets a sternly worded letter in his permanent file for not playing ball the other night	(30)
	Today's college football discussion thread. Yes Virginia, there is college football on a Friday, hooray	(346)
(Some Guy)	The complete list of golf slang	(29)
	Former Georgia Bulldogs players and family can now enjoy eternity in a stadium adjacent cemetery tricked out with UGA syling notes, and the privilege of having tailgaters parking trucks on their resting places during homegames. Glory glory	(19)
	Youngest NHL player ever dies at age 82. Wait... what?	(10)
	The Kansas Jayhawks agree to four more years of selling Arrowhead Stadium seats to Mizzou alum	(26)

Thu November 27, 2008

	German soccer star appears as Pink Panther in new retro Nike ad	(16)
	Allen Iverson fined for missing practice. Practice? We're talking about practice?	(76)
	John Daly opens Australian Masters with a 76, not to be confused with the 76 beers he opened before his round	(10)
	Sappy: High school water boy gets to play season's final down, comes off a double-team to make a tackle. Something in your eye: He has Down syndrome	(39)
	The upstart United Football League will replace the void left by the XFL. "It gives the fans a closer perspective to what professional football is all about."	(46)
	Trade him to LA, Jay. Kill him with a brick, Rick. Stab him with a pike, Mike, just set this team free	(17)
(Some Turducken)	Titans/Lions, Seahawks/Cowboys and Cardinals/Eagles. Your Turkey Day NFL discussion thread	(683)
	Sports Illustrated's much awaited Turkeys of the Year. Warning: Slideshow starts with Rich Rod and goes downhill from there	(51)
	Philadelphia sports reporter says "no team has ever been as awful as 5-5-1 after 11 games." Lions, Chiefs and other teams want to explain the difference between hyperbole and inaccuracy to this guy	(26)
	Olympic officials reduce modern pentathlon to four events by combining running and shooting portions. Geez, my mom won't even let me run with scissors	(15)
	Portland Trail Blazers beat Miami by 38; the combined margin of last four wins: 102 points	(26)

Wed November 26, 2008

	Former NBA player blamed for starting "bloody street brawl" during Croatian Pro League game (with pic, video)	(25)
	Jimmy Connors mugshot. Dig that jacket, man	(75)
	WIth LeBron out of town and only two other healthy guards on the roster, Stephon Marbury is once again the big story as he once again refuses to get off the bench	(20)
	Microsoft ends endorsement deal with LeBron James. In other news, LeBron James had an endorsement deal with Microsoft	(6)
	John Daly just wants to focus on golf. In other news, Amy Winehouse just wants to focus on her music	(7)
	Handy tip for Ron Artest: It's probably not a good idea to post video of yourself on your blog exhaling suspicious smoke	(14)
(Champaign News-Gazette)	High school basketball coach allegedly guilty of "racial profiling" for cutting eight black players from an entirely African-American team	(83)
	Patriots Special Teams Ace, Je'rod Cherry, is auctioning off his first super bowl ring in order to raise money for charity. Part of the proceeds will go toward teaching New England sports fans the meaning of the word "humble"	(55)
	With 1/4 of the NHL season already behind us here are your NHL Power Rankings. Red Wings still looking up at the Sharks	(41)
	91 years ago today, The National Hockey League is born	(45)
	NCAA investigator says self-imposed sanctions appropriate and meaningful, waves arms frantically to distract reporters' attention from large bucket of whitewash	(8)
(Pro Football Talk)	Wondering what would happen if the Jets and Giants both were to host conference championship games on the same day at the same stadium? Fear not, the NFL already has a contingency plan	(18)
	Much like Derek Jeter, Yankees expecting big things from A-Rod	(9)
	Pop quiz: Who's the NFL lowest rated QB this season? JaMarcus Russell? J.T. O'Sullivan? Everybody on the Lions? BZZZT. Nope, it's three-time Pro Bowl QB Matt Hasselbeck	(51)
	2009 Indy 500 to be powered by sugar based ethanol. For some reason, people are upset about this	(21)
	Chelsea, Liverpool, Barca, and Inter look to stay in control of their groups. If you don't know what this means, it must be your official Wednesday Champions League discussion forum	(29)
	Chicago Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher dresses his 3-year old son in pink Cinderella diapers and toenail polish	(25)
	ESPN thinks its a foregone conclusion that Lebron James is going to the Knicks in 2010. Let the overhype machine begin	(71)
	Ten quotes from sports commentators that they wish they could take back	(73)
	Charity asks Roger Clemens to end association with their golf tournament because of Mitchell Report implications, as America's fine tradtition of holding someone "guilty until proven innocent" continues	(31)
	Ex-wife of Tennessee basketball coach Bruce Pearl opens salon in Knoxville with divorce settlement money called "Alimony's"	(31)
	Delta to become the official airline of the New York Yankees. This is bad news for the official airline of the New York Mets: Delta	(22)
	Brady Quinn will courageously watch the rest of the season from the sidelines with a boo-boo	(41)

Tue November 25, 2008

	Reaction by gorgeous Russian pole vaulter after she won World Athlete of the Year award: "If We Are Ugly Nobody Will Be Interested." Hear that, WNBA?	(39)
	Donovan McNabb was only benched for one half, and he's still the starter in Philadelphia, but that won't stop the rumor mill from speculating he'll be playing in Chicago next year	(27)
	Three years after winning the league MVP, Shaun Alexander is unemployed	(51)
(Some Guy)	Having learned nothing from guaranteeing a victory over the New England Patriots last year, only to get demolished, Pittsburgh Steelers safety Anthony Smith repeats his guarantee	(25)
	NBA Sixers cheerleader falls on her head after trampoline stunt, only to have no one help her up. Now she knows how Bengals quarterbacks feel every Sunday (with video)	(24)
	"The Chiefs are quantifiably the worst pass-rushing team ever. They have six sacks this year. That's six sacks. The whole team. The whole year. Six sacks. Derrick Thomas once had seven sacks in a single game."	(44)
	Michigan State coach asked if he was embarrassed by getting blown out by Penn State last Saturday: "No, embarrassing would be if we were 3-9" (with audio)	(43)
	The official NFL power Rankings are in. Giants and Jets at 1 & 3. Titans maintain #2 spot. One things is for sure, one of the NY teams is going to ruin Tennesee's season	(43)
	A preview of the Detroit Lions vs. the Tennessee Titans, a game that could be such a blowout, it will ruin your Thanksgiving no matter how much cranberry sauce you eat	(37)
	Steve Nash now reported to be joining the Knicks. CC Sabathia, Manon Rheaume, Boba Fett also reportedly close to signing contract	(32)
(Some Guy)	I-AA team is ranked No. 24 in a computer poll that helps determine BCS rankings, meaning they're better than LSU and Michigan State. Fark: That I-AA team lost to Duke 31-7. Duke sucks	(57)
(Football Outsiders)	837-point Week 12 sets NFL leaguewide scoring record. Rams still could only get 3	(21)
	Don't look now, but if the season ended today we'd have a Patriots-free playoffs	(50)
	Lions fans wrestle in parking lot following Sunday's game. Marinelli to watch the tape, give the guy with the masscrack tips on pad level	(17)
	South Florida football coach Jim Leavitt loses his mind at press conference, might need an intervention (with video)	(25)
	Inspired by the endless number of chances Pacman Jones has gotten, Michael Vick takes one step closer to returning to the NFL	(50)
	"As players, we only wish that [John Daly] put a little bit more time into his game and less time into ruining his personal life."	(11)
(Some Guy)	DEr Boris - d weddin S off, I h8 u. PS - Stefan Edberg cllD 2 sA u suk	(9)
	There are five weeks to go in the regular season, but that won't stop the NY Daily News from previewing the upcoming Jets-Giants Super Bowl	(97)
	Man U, Real Madrid, and a bunch of smaller teams play today; it's not news, it's your official Tuesday Champions League discussion forum	(54)
	LeBron James will unveil new "Big Apple Red" shoe tonight in game at Madison Square Garden, where he will meet future teammates David Lee, Wilson Chandler and.... and... well, those two anyway	(42)
	New England Patriots might have to use franchise tag on their QB. No, not Tom Brady... the guy who hadn't started since high school and is suddenly lighting up the scoreboard like a Christmas tree	(116)
	Browns running back says he's confused with the team's playcalling. Specifically the part where the team is calling plays to throw to a guy with hands harder than Chinese algebra	(31)
	Donovan McNabb didn't know he could celebrate his birthday today	(23)
	Wizards fire Jordan. No, not the one from 2003	(5)
	Own-Byrne'd	(30)
	St. Louis Rams' OG Richie Incognito really knows how to endear the hometown fans suffering with the worst football team in the NFL. With bonus smug-ass interview in locker room about the incident	(53)

Mon November 24, 2008

	43 year old Claude Lemieux signs deal with San Jose, Darren McCarty puts on foil	(49)
	After Noel Gallagher gets assaulted on stage during tour, Oasis hires world's most expensive bodyguard: Ricky Hatton	(9)
	Pittsburgh Pirates sign two Indians who've never been to Cleveland	(21)
	BlackBerry's Balsille battling Bettman and Board's blacklisting by buying Biaggio's bankrupt business?	(19)
	Baseball pariah Barry Bonds finally lands endorsement. Nike? Vitaminwater? Under Armour? Try a guns and ammo company	(15)
	After getting thrashed at home by the New York Jets, the Tennessee Titans admit who is the better team -- the Titans	(320)
	Commissioner Roger Goodell finally insists Pacman Jones must stop his bad behavior, or else he'll say "stop" again	(22)
	Cowboys' mascot placed on double-secret probation with NFL for consensual chest bump with player	(24)
	Stop me if you've heard this one before... Toronto Maple Leafs trade away two former first round draft picks for some guy you've never heard of	(36)
(The Scores Report)	The Raiders beat the Broncos 31-10 despite attempting only 11 passes, although the bigger story might be that JaMarcus Russell actually completed 10 of those 11 attempts	(31)
	Minnesota Vikings head coach Brad Childress shows that it's more important to lay down the law than to be concerned with winning. Luckily for him, he managed to do both	(24)
	McNabb to start for Eagles on Thursday, the latest in a long line of turkeys that get roasted on Thanksgiving	(32)
	NFL game to air in 3-D. Since it's the Chargers and Raiders however, the NFL has allowed one lucky fan to have control over the electric football on/off switch between whistles	(17)
	New NCAA basketball rankings look an awful lot like the Big East (coast bias). Duke sucks	(37)
	College football's most unusual trophies. Why would you replace a slab of bacon with an axe?	(127)
	Charles Barkley headlines the 2008 Hall of Fame inductees, which is just turrible, turrible, crazy knuckleheaded turrible	(20)
	Arsenal is proud to introduce Captain Fabregas and the Whiners	(13)
	World's worst jockey wins first race in 28 years - and still finds a way to almost lose that one too (pic)	(22)
	Philadelphia Eagles get spanked by the Ravens, pull McNabb for the second half, and begin a slow, pathetic slide into the dank, dark cellar of the NFC East	(71)
	Michael Phelps makes shortest, most pointless cameo ever on Entourage	(84)
(BCS)	New BCS standings look an awful lot like the Big XII	(160)
	What NFL teams can learn from the CFL champion Calgary Stampeders. Rams can learn that maybe it's best to just punt on third down and be done with it	(15)
	It's only a matter of time before the Mutant Football League becomes a reality	(19)
	Three-time defending champion Appalachian State the #2 seed in the pretend brackets set for the imaginary Division I Football Playoffs, because as everyone knows it's impossible to have a playoff in college football	(36)
	Bill Snyder headed back to Kansas State. Eastern Illinois, Montana State, and Hofstra put on 2012 non-conference schedule	(15)
	The 1972 Dolphins can once again pop the champagne corks, thanks to a QB who was a rookie during that season	(53)
	Interesting: Attempt the rarely used fair-catch, free-kick field goal. Spiffy: You have all the time in the world to set everything up the way you want it. Fail: The kick	(73)