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Sun September 28, 2008
(ESPN) Amusing Baseball's top 10 payroll-bloated godawful teams in recent history. '93 Mets, '03 Mets go one-two (12)
(Yahoo) Amusing Broncos crush Chiefs 33-19... wait what?? (44)
(Chicago Tribune) Unlikely Cubs VP on offering first dibs on face value playoff tickets to politicians: "government officials don't get the opportunities because they are political sluggers who might someday be able to do the team a favor" (7)
(Some Guy) Obvious Quarterback controversy? What quarterback controversy? Ohhh...THAT quarterback controversy (20)
(Sportsline) Spiffy Milwaukee or the Mets, Sox or Twins... it's the last day of the MLB regular season (more or less). Discuss (231)
(Some NFL Guy) Interesting It's that time again; your Sunday NFL Thread. Come for the fantasy, stay for the upsets (1841)
(Daily Gazette (Schenectady)) Dumbass If a key Red Sox player gets hurt for the playoffs in today's meaningless doubleheader, they can thank their money-grubbing management (45)
(The New York Times) Asinine New York Times reporter gets some parting thoughts on Shea Stadium from poets and beer vendors. Classy Mets management pulls reporter's press credential (10)
(Some Guy) Obvious Only 53% of rugby stars would play if booze was banned from the event. "I love a beer, so I'd never agree to something like that." (32)
(Orlando Sentinel) Sad Tim Tebow fights back tears while apologizing to Gator Nation that he couldn't gain one yard with game on the line. Duke sucks (47)
(Daily Mail) Cool For those who believe racing should involve more than just left turns, pics of the track in Singapore of F1's first ever night race (41)
(News Of The World) Scary Looks like the Brits finally got their own Joe Theismann. (warning: OUCHIE pics) (57)
(Yahoo) Cool Carlos Beltran: So, this year, tell Jimmy Rollins we are the team to beat. Jimmy Rollins: HAHAHAHAHAHA (19)

Sat September 27, 2008
(Major League Baseball) Fail A win today would clinch the NL Wild Card for the Brewers. Since this is Fark, you know how this ends (26)
(JSOnline) Cool Guy gets offer of hockey scholarship from UW-Madison. All he has to do is finish high school first... he's 14-years-old (28)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing NBA Coach makes vow to quit cursing this season. Now if he can only avoid being photographed giving obscene gestures (with pic) (6)
(CNN) Obvious Question: Which sport is best? Wrong: Baseball is best. Fact: Baseball utilizes batters. Baseball. Batters. Battlestar Galactica (46)
(ESPN) Cool Three teams battle it out for two playoff spots in the NL, the White Sox try to keep pace with the Twins with two games left in the AL. Your MLB discussion thread (143)
(Google) Cool Ls Ngls Ddgrs ssstnt gnrl mngr Km Ng cld pssbl jn Sttl Mrnrs s bsbll's frst fml GM (39)
(AP) Spiffy Milwaukee Brewers back in front in the wild card chase. Ned Yost unavailable for comment (18)
(ESPN) Cool Can the Dawgs blackout the Tide tonight? Can the Fighting Zooks take over Paterno's lawn? Can Pete Carroll remember what he did with that damn remote? It's the Week Five college football discussion (1989)
(BBC) Cool It's your Week Six English Premier League discussion thread (66)
(AP) Obvious As opposed to the heartfelt tributes to Yankee Stadium as it closed last weekend, Shea Stadium is getting remembrances like this one, from Joe Torre: "The ballpark really didn't wear well. I thought it got old in a hurry" (24)
(Entertainment Weekly) Silly What do Stephen King, Chewbacca, and Carrot Top have in common? These amusing ESPN ads (23)
(AP) Cool Athletes to donate brains for concussion study. Fortunately Joe Namath has already pre-pickled his (9)
(ESPN) Spiffy The Yankees beat the Red Sox to clinch division title. For The Rays (34)
(Major League Baseball) Misc In case you needed further proof that God hates the Red Sox, Pesky ceremony rained out (22)

Fri September 26, 2008
(Toronto Star) Unlikely Toronto Maple Leafs send 13 players to minor-league affiliate after deciding they weren't skilled enough to lose games for them (14)
(Denver Channel) Scary John Elway turns to the dark side (48)
(CNN) Amusing Remaining NL playoff contenders are at the mercy of Lou Piniella and the Cubs. Where is your God now? (43)
(Google) Followup Benson will not face charges over Texas arrests, will instead be released into custody of Clayton Endicott III (19)
(700 WLW) Amusing Bengals QB Carson Palmer may not play Sunday, joining the rest of his team who hasn't played all season (25)
(Some Guy) Obvious Rams are quickly becoming Raiders Lite (31)
(IndyStar) Spiffy Man finds Tony Dungy's credit card on a gas pump. Returns it for an autographed football (42)
(ESPN) Obvious Former Nebraska running back charged with first-degree murder, promptly offered coaching positions at Miami, FSU, and Penn State (33)
(Journal News) Sad "The Yankees have a problem with the credibility of their manager" (35)
(Denver Post) Strange Claude Lemieux wants to rejoin the NHL after 5 year absence, believes he has a shot and would be cheap for a team (42)
(Some Guy) Asinine UGA - Alabama game may be cancelled due to *shakes magic 8 ball* the gas shortage (51)
(Chicago Sun-Times) Interesting 77-year-old Cubs Hall of Famer Ernie Banks adopts a child. Contrary to reports, he did not adopt two (10)
(BBC) Misc Uefa Cup to be renamed. UFIA Cup suggested as it would make soccer a hell of a lot more interesting to watch (10)
(BBC) Interesting Nigerian consortium wants to buy Newcastle United, needs your help getting £350M out of the country (5)
(The Sun) Amusing Celtic manager Gordon Strachan's greatest one-liners, including "Gordon, can we have a quick word please", "Velocity" (35)
(ESPN) Obvious Attention White Sox fans, there is still room on the Big Blue Train. Apply while you still can (173)
(Home Run Derby) Obvious Bad things happen when the Chicago Cubs are on the cover of Sports Illustrated. So guess who's on the cover this week? Jinx it. Done (71)
(The New York Times) Interesting For those flying into NYC next spring, pilots flying into La Guardia say it will only take a few weeks for them to get to used to banking planes left around the new outfield wall when headed for Runway 31, 32, 33, 34 once Shea is gone (33)
(ESPN) Interesting Beavers rip Trojans, AP and BCS polls to need morning-after pill (273)
(Baltimore Sun) Amusing Young Muslim athletes face real challenges repressing their teammates during Ramadan due to a severe lack of carbohydrates (127)

Thu September 25, 2008
(Yahoo) Silly WNBA names Minnesota Lynx rookie Candice Wiggins Sixth Woman of the Year, which is kinda like being named the best non-prime time show on the Oxygen Network (31)
(Some Raccoon) Silly Only in Tennessee: Pat Summit needs shoulder surgery after injuring it while chasing a Raccoon (15)
(WTMJ) Cool Erik Gagne to give away 5,000 free tickets. One for each blown save (25)
(Yahoo) Spiffy The Top 10 moments of penalty box mayhem, with Sean Avery and video goodness (28)
(The Onion) Amusing Struggling Mets Combine To Form Carlos Voltron. "We really need power this late in the season, and the 2.5 million pounds of thrust in Voltron's solid-fuel boosters should give us the lift we need" (17)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing After getting ambushed during a radio interview, Michael Phelps forgets to hang up phone, saying to his handlers, "I didn't say nothing. That guy was a idiot, that was ridiculous." (with audio) (43)
(ESPN) Amusing Vince Young's spiritual advisor compares him to a rainbow trout, says he needs to "go free and... do alone what he can do." Jeff Fisher agrees about the alone part, wonders what the pastor has against trout (10)
(ESPN) Amusing Bottom 10 general managers in sports history. Matt Millen is #1 with a bullet (47)
(Cincinnati Enquirer) Strange Dusty Baker's daughter is NOT dating or engaged to Reds outfielder Corey Patterson. Which leads to the question: Why did this guy make the team and get 350 ABs this year? (13)
(CNN) Scary Another key difference between American football and Brazilian football: in Brazilian football, it's the ex-girlfriend who's hiring thugs to murder the football player (10)
(Sports by Brooks) Cool Nude "Women of Curling" calendar sure to get your stones sliding(Not safe for work-ish) (31)
(BBC) Asinine Oympic medal-winner complains that keeping records "hurt" women's sports in much the same way that keeping score discourages five-year-olds from playing T-ball (15)
(USA Today) Interesting With Miami's surprising success last week, odd offensive formations may become popular in the NFL. Expect to see Detroit running the Wing-T, the Rams in the A-11, and the Raiders lining up in the Run and Shoot Al Davis (58)
(Rocky Mountain News) Unlikely With the Nuggets in the practice of trading away costly players, Allen Iverson believes he could be next. Practice (20)
(Cincinnati Enquirer) Amusing Reporter learns why you don't bet against USC football (45)
(Yahoo) Dumbass Bad: Admitting you got hurt during the offseason in a manner that violates your NBA contract. Worse: Admitting you were riding a moped (17)
(The New York Times) Followup New York Giants WR Plaxico Burress' unexcused absence may have had something to do with the two domestic disputes at his home over the past few months (57)
(The Sun) Amusing Brits miffed about Ryder Cup loss. Commence bragging about superior music, food and dwarf tossing abilities. Dwarf tossing??? The Sun is there (93)
(Newsday) Fail Einstein defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. In related news Mets fans who still expect their bullpen to not blow the game to be declared insane (33)
(MSNBC) Cool Joe Torre's streak of making the playoffs is still intact. Bonus, people actually LIKE the Dodgers (95)
(Yahoo) Silly Gina Carano calls a press conference to complain about being too popular. Who? (44)
(Chicago Sun-Times) Dumbass Why wait for the season to end and free agency to begin before throwing your teammates under the bus? It's not like they're leading the division or anyth... Oh, wait, they are (37)
(Now Magazine) Dumbass Man United soccer star Wayne Rooney finds filling his car with the right fuel really confusing (26)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing One day after beach photos of a ballooned Baron Davis surface, L.A. Clippers guard announces publicly he's gone on Jenny Craig diet plan to get ready for training camp (9)
(Some Guy) Stupid The Brewers' master plan to keep CC Sabathia: Pitch him so often, that no one else will even want him anymore... Or at best, make sure he's as useless as possible in case they make the playoffs (23)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Derek Lowe, who left his wife and kids for Fox Sports Net anchor after moving to L.A. to pitch for Dodgers, selling his "shack of sin" beach home for $5.7M (with pics) (11)

Wed September 24, 2008
(Some Guy) Sick Norwegian Pro Skiier accidentally goes off course and jumps off a 351-foot cliff. And skis away with very minor injuries. Tag is for what submitter said (19)
(Some Guy) Weird Amare Stoudamire dances on the Nickelodeon show Yo Gabba Gabba (with flashback inducing video) (22)
(Some Guy) Stupid New York Knicks vehemently deny rumors that they are going to operate as if they were a professional franchise (7)
(Yahoo) Sad Former New York Giants cornerback, longtime radio analyst, and winner of "unfortunate names" contest, Dick Lynch has died from leukemia (15)
(ESPN) Obvious Tennessee clocks in at number 5 on ESPN's Bottom 10, definitively proving that the SEC is the best conference in college football (46)
(ESPN) Followup Derek Anderson will start for the Browns this weekend, because Brady Quinn sucks that much (27)
(Some Guy) Dumbass 'Bama coach accidentally caught firing the first shot in anticipation of this weekend's game against Georgia. "They're wearing black because they're going to a motherfarking funeral" (with video goodness) (38)
(ESPN) Strange 18 people arrested for stealing pieces of Yankee Stadium. They were easy to catch late in the season, which means they were actually Mets fans (23)
(ESPN) Interesting ESPN takes a look at the Yankees inability to generate young talent (32)
(Examiner) Sad Oakland A's honor 40th anniversary team without Mark McGwire. So Roger Clemens wasn't the only suspected steroid user absent from a special ceremony on Sunday (25)
(Philly) Interesting Philadelphia Flyers LW Simon Gagne targets Saturday for post-concussion return, Sunday for new-concussion exit (16)
(AP) Obvious Brett Favre worries how much injured ankle will limit him in practice but feels he'll be be fine to throw picks into double coverage by Sunday (45)
(Daily Mail) Stupid Toilets at the 2012 Olympics in London will face away from Mecca so as not to offend Muslims. However, they will face toward Yorkshire, which will offend everybody else (322)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Tampa Bay Rays don't know who to get to throw out their first-ever playoff first pitch - "We realized nobody in the history of the franchise had done anything to be worthy of the honor" (60)
(Click On Detroit) Obvious The End of an Error: Matt Millen out as Detroit Lions GM (101)
(CSMonitor) Amusing Stand up paddle surfboards are the SUVs of surfing. And just as beloved (136)
(Fox Sports) Dumbass Plaxico Burress skips school for two days, refuses to take out the trash, gets grounded for two weeks (34)
(ESPN) Obvious The NFC East owns the top three teams in ESPN's power rankings. "East coast bias" biatching to the right folks (129)
(ESPN) Obvious Pac-10 quarterbacks are a bunch of wusses (17)
(LA Times) Spiffy USC's new triple threat. Quarterback, tight end... and defensive lineman? (11)
(Yahoo) Spiffy Lance Armstrong make benefit glorious team cycling of Kazakhstan (23)
(Examiner) Unlikely Al Davis to face the guillotine as underlings gather with torches and pitchforks to depose the dictator (32)
(Yahoo) Obvious "Back-to-back home runs for the Twins? That's like two straight laughs at a Dane Cook show." Ladies and gents, Jeff Passan has already won the thread (76)
(TSN) Weird Blues' D Erik Johnson to miss entire season due to golf injury. Leaf's entire organization in trouble for next year (31)
(Major League Baseball) Obvious After missing the postseason for the first time in 14 years Hank Steinbrenner is proud of his team. Just kidding, he whines about being in the AL East (143)
(Some Guy) Obvious Alabama fans already looking past Georgia game, dreaming of more Auburn losses, and rubbing their lucky Bear Bryant statue raw (61)
(Sports by Brooks) Obvious Jessica Alba, four months removed from pregnancy, is photographed on beach with NBAer Baron Davis, who opens training camp in two weeks with Clippers. One guess who's in better shape. (with pics) (34)

Tue September 23, 2008
(Yahoo) Sad For the first time since 1993, the New York Yankees will be watching the playoffs from the couch (133)
(Sports by Brooks) Strange Texas Tech football coach gives dating advice on coaches show: "End it at a coffee shop where there's bizarre looking characters. So if the conversation isn't going well, you can reference them." (with video) (18)
(Sun Sentinel) Asinine New England Patriot fans can't jump off the bandwagon quick enough. "It's a testament to how spoiled they are where expectations are that high that we're not allowed a bad game." (108)
(ESPN) Obvious Beanie Wells is expected to play against Minnesota this weekend as Ohio State continues its quest for a third blowout loss in the BCS title game (40)
(MSNBC) Stupid $209 million spent and an absolute miracle necessary to even make the playoffs, the New York Yankees still won't fire anybody (125)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing MMA tough guy Patrick Cote gets ready for UFC bout with grueling backyard diaper wrestling sessions (with pics) (13)
(myfoxstl.com) Scary Mark Bulger is benched. The St. Louis Rams announce Trent Green will start Sunday against Buffalo. Lloyds of London cancels Green's life insurance policy (40)
(AP) Obvious After starting the season 0-3 with Derek Anderson at quarterback, the Cleveland Browns are considering a much more heartful, courageous alternative (46)
(ESPN) Obvious Albert Pujols is "the most consistent player in all of baseball. He's the most consistent professional athlete on the planet. He may be the most consistent player in any sport ever" (92)
(Yahoo) Scary Gary Sheffield promises beatdown to Cleveland players, on or off the field (71)
(Some Guy) Amusing Evaluating MLB predictions: Come for the Steve Phillips mocking, stay for Buster Olney doing worse than just using 2007 records (26)
(Boston Herald) Cool Red Sox change retired number policy, will retire #6 in Johnny Pesky's honor (26)
(ESPN) Obvious If baseball games only lasted six innings, the Mets would be in first place by 11.5 games (46)
(Chicago Tribune) Unlikely Chicago asking Wrigley-area bars to stop serving alcohol during the playoffs, which is like asking hookers near a naval base to not do business when the men return from a year at sea (142)
(Some Dead Guy) Amusing A look inside Bobby Petrino's gmail account (33)
(YouTube) Interesting Anyone who says Willie Mays never went up against the Green Monster obviously never saw his appearance on this 70s kids show (7)
(NASCAR) Misc Former champ car superstar and world-class d-bag A.J. Allmendinger is released from NASCAR's Red Bull Racing, making the way for former F1 driver Scott Speed to take his seat (45)
(LA Times) Obvious Joe Torre thinks managing in the National League is more complex and challenging than the American League. "Everyone has an idea of what'd they do in a situation. In this league, there are more of those choices" (51)
(Hartford Courant) Interesting BoSox ponder how to celebrate IF they make the playoffs. Yankees gain automatic bid from Joe Buck, will face Notre Dame in Fiesta Bowl (28)
(Yahoo) Followup Lewis Hamilton loses appeal of penalty given to him for illegally passing Kimi Raikkonen at Belgian Grand Prix as Formula 1 sends strongest message ever that passing other cars will not be tolerated (52)
(Sports by Brooks) Weird Things are heating up for the Milwaukee Brewers -- especially if your name is Ben Sheets and your condo almost catches on fire (10)
(Wikipedia) Interesting The Merkle Boner is 100 today. Nothing Viagra can do for that (32)
(NYPost) Obvious Video celebrating Yankees greatest players at every position forgot one alleged steroid-scandal-scarred pitcher (51)
(CNN) Sad Iowa cheerleaders get third uniform change this year because of their butts. "Girls are just bigger these days, not everybody's a size zero" (70)
(Newsday) Obvious Your point guard might be in the best shape of his career and focused. Do you C) Waive him and pay him $20 million to play for your competitor? Hint: You're the NY Knicks (27)
(Mercury News) Weird Not news: Raiders STILL haven't fired Coach Kiffin. News: Raiders employee calls Mike Silver and another colunnist liars. Fark: Raiders employee calls them potsmoking liars and threatens to punch the columnist. With video goodness (23)
(Yahoo) Obvious Lions not built Ford tough: Millen needs to be outsourced (33)
(Major League Baseball) Amusing Game 1 of NLCS now guaranteed to be played at Wrigley Field (71)
(Newsday) Obvious Upon further review, NY Giants fans still aren't shocked to hear their former TE, Jeremy Shockey, is already in post-season (19)

Mon September 22, 2008
(CNN) Interesting NFL ratings go up after Tom Brady is injured. Bonus: Even in the Boston market (71)
(ESPN) Cool One team is trying to salvage a season. The other is trying to salvage a franchise. Your Jets-Chargers Monday Night Football preview thread is right here (699)
(CNN) Cool The top four NFL teams all reside in the NFC. Where is your football god now, AFC fans? (131)
(NFP) Scary Al Harris could be out for the year. Fark: with a ruptured spleen? (63)
(NASCAR) Fail Kyle Busch before Sprint Cup Chase: Tears up competition. Kyle Busch in Sprint Cup Chase: Tears up race cars (46)
(ESPN) Stupid What do you do when your teammate offers words of encouragement after you throw an interception? If you're Rutgers QB Mike Teel, you throw a punch at him (49)
(St. Petersburg Times) Obvious Bobby Bowden grins and pounds table in excitement upon hearing that Joe Paterno was forced to coach Saturday's game from the press box (45)
(Yahoo) Sad Will the last one to leave please turn off the lights (117)
(MVN) Interesting 5 reasons why the Minnesota Twins could upset the Chicago White Sox. In other news, there is another baseball team in Chicago (132)
(Sports by Brooks) Obvious Report: Lane Kiffin to be fired by Raiders on Monday, with Kiffin's possible next stop as Syracuse Univ. Coach (59)
(NHL) Cool Having learned their lesson from the Buffa-slug disaster, Sabres release new 3rd jersey (54)

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