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Sun September 07, 2008
(Yahoo) Sad Don Haskins, former Texas Western basketball coach and subject of the movie "Glory Road" dead at 78 (10)
(Bitten and Bound) Followup Tom Brady knee injury video (127)
(AP) Cool East Carolina football team makes its debut in the AP Top 25 at number 14 after beating two overrated has-beens (49)
(NBC Sports) Followup Jets staff told Tom Brady has a torn ACL. Daunte Culpepper, please pick up the white courtesy phone (117)
(ESPN) Cool Pop the cork on Lucas Oil Stadium: Da Bears vs Colts Sunday Night Football discussion thread (668)
(ESPN) Followup That "thrilling" pass Lewis Hamilton made to win the Belgian GP was declared illegal and Felipe Massa has been declared the winner (30)
(Yahoo) Stupid Chad Ocho Cinco has to wear his Johnson jersey until Reebok is done selling them (28)
(ESPN) Cool Three runs in the bottom of the ninth means this one belongs to the Reds. And not to the Cubs, although the Brewers are capitalizing on this about as well as e.e. cummings (31)
(Yahoo) Obvious No, San Diego Padres. You can't have your first no-hitter. Not yours (15)
(Boston Globe) Obvious Tom Brady injured; Peter King listening to nine inch nails and cutting himself (233)
(Pro Football Talk) Obvious So now that Plaxico Burress has signed a deal, Anquan Boldin has surely come to his senses, realized his market value, and wants to get a deal done with the Cardinals, right? No, he's still demanding to be traded? (13)
(Reuters) Unlikely Lewi Hamilton wins Belgian Grand Prix in race commentators describe as "thrilling" because one car almost passed another (33)
(Baseball reference) Interesting Chances are high that someone will hit the 250,000th home run in major league history today (25)
(ESPN) Interesting A look at today's NFL games. Subby has already started on today's NFL beer and needs someone to talk to (1350)
(ESPN) Interesting Not news: They have won 7 in a row. News: They have the lowest runs scored against in the league. Fark: It's the Blue Jays, and they are 8 games back of the wild card (26)
(ESPN) Obvious Notre Dame rallies in the fourth quarter to win against the juggernaut that is San Diego State, promptly receives Fiesta Bowl bid (31)
(ESPN) Obvious Ohio State rallies in the 4th quarter to a comeback win over Ohio, exciting football fans over the ensuing 70-3 beatdown they'll receive from USC next weekend (44)
(News.com.au) Scary Aussies will be limited to one case of beer per day at the annual Bathurst 1000 car race. EVERBODY PANIC MATE (33)
(Major League Baseball) Obvious The Cubs give up three field goals against Cincinnati, manage to hold on to victory with two touchdowns (11)
(DFW Star-Telegram) Amusing Boston's Josh Beckett comes off the DL to throw five scoreless innings. Fark: With his fly open (pic) (15)
(Bitten and Bound) Sad Skateboarder Van Wastell dead at age 24 after falling out a hotel window just days before turning pro (49)
(Yahoo) Interesting KHAAAAAN knocked out in under a minute (21)

Sat September 06, 2008
(Some Guy) Cool UFC 88 discussion to the right (129)
(Some Guy) Cool CBS sues "no fun league" union to prevent it from charging you money to play fantasy football (22)
(ESPN) Amusing West Virginia left wishing they had offered Rich Rodriguez $20 million a year after they get stomped by East Carolina, a state that doesn't even exist (68)
(ESPN) Spiffy Manny Ramirez ties Ted Williams for 17th place on all time HR list, propels LA Dodgers into 1st place in the NL West (31)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Lou Piniella takes a wrong turn during September drive - just like his ballclub (16)
(ESPN) Interesting Article points out teams with weak non-conference schedules over the last ten years. SEC featured prominently. This should go over well (52)
(The Sun) Spiffy Lingerie Football League (LFL) will launch in 2009 with 10 franchise teams featuring women players wearing underwear uniforms, pads and helmets. John Madden requests private motion capture sessions for 'Madden 2010' game (46)
(ESPN) Spiffy Week 2 of the College season offers no top 25 vs top 25 match ups and only has 7 games with spreads of less than a touchdown. It's your week 2 College Football Discussion Thread (1308)
(AP) Interesting Dont look know, but maybe that Manny trade to LA wasn't such a crazy deal after all... at least for the Dodgers (44)
(AP) Fail Yankees get one hit against pitcher making first career start (45)
(ESPN) Cool Official 2010 World Cup qualifiers thread for today's games. Which country do you support? (84)
(Bloomberg) Sad The Colts' new $717 million dollar stadium that will be used roughly 10 times in a year is "the biggest taxpayer ripoff in NFL history" (59)
(Guardian.com) Obvious English national soccer team captain admits side is "gripped by fear of failure" and hates to hear fans booing them for 90 minutes every match, but they suck and probably always will, so what are you going to do? (17)
(ESPN) Cool A's score 8 runs in an inning. On only one hit (16)
(Idaho Statesman) Amusing Idaho football team asks university for new pant design, preferably without large "I" printed in middle of players' asses. Took a while, butt university finally cracks (12)
(Telegraph) Sad 1958 US Open champ Tommy Bolt dead at 92; provided angry golfers everywhere with great advice: "Always throw your clubs ahead of you. That way, you won't waste energy going back to pick them up." (6)
(Fox Sports) Obvious Patriots could become first NFL team to win 20 consecutive non-playoff games. Their last game, the Superbowl, which they lost, doesn't count against the streak (101)
(Orange County Register) Amusing Sporting good retailer replacing Chick's with Dick's (79)

Fri September 05, 2008
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Michael Phelps showing off his breaststroke - at the Playboy Club in Vegas (29)
(ESPN) Interesting After a brief skid, the Cubs right the ship and continue their historic journey to immortalit-- no, wait, now it's the Reds (of all teams) beating the snot of them (18)
(Some SEC Guy) Spiffy "When ranking the toughest football leagues in the land, the NFL would be No. 1, and the Southeastern Conference would be No. 2." I couldn't have said it better myself (46)
(YouTube) Cool On the day he was inducted to the basketball hall of fame, here's The Dream showing why he is the greastest center of our lifetime. Bonus: David Robinson was his biatch. Over and over (38)
(Major League Baseball) Sad News: Playoff-contending Chicago team loses key player to injury in final month of regular season. Fark: It's the White Sox's Carlos Quentin (38)
(Yahoo) Interesting At this rate, Philadelphia Eagles QB Donovan McNabb will have nobody left to throw to by week 3 (37)
(Newsday) Spiffy John Carney, at age 44, leads the National Football League in points scored, kids chased off of lawn (36)
(Sports by Brooks) Followup Vandy coach talks a litte smack after smacking the 'Cocks: "We beat them last year and I don't know why everybody thought they got so much better than what we were getting" (47)
(Wall Street Journal) Interesting This year, A-Rod's putting up about the same numbers as Lou Gehrig did in his last full season with the Yanks...playing 162 games with ALS (74)
(AP) Obvious Andy Roddick jokes about unranked opponent's physical ailments. Unranked opponent promptly beats Roddick (48)
(Cracked) Unlikely Seven great sports moments (that might have been fixed) (234)
(Buffalo News) Dumbass Just days from season opener, Buffalo Bills LB Angelo Crowell decides to undergo knee surgery that will put him out one to four weeks. Bills reward this decision by putting him on season-ending IR list. Dumbass tags for everybody (27)
(AP) Sad In top-speed motorcycle racing, there are two categories of competitors: Grand Master Champion, and Stuff On The Pavement (20)
(Stuff) Unlikely British businessman gets 10,000-1 odds that Obama will lose the presidential race and then move to England to manage a football club (10)
(Celebitchy) Interesting Lance Armstrong says he never gets complaints from women. That's almost too nuts to believe (27)
(ESPN) Obvious It's safe to say that Joe Paterno is not in favor of legalizing marijuana (18)
(ESPN) Spiffy Brewers about to say "Fark it. Start C.C. every game." (32)
(ESPN) Obvious Steve Spurrier tries to outdo Nick Saban as most underperforming coach in the SEC by choking to Vanderbilt (51)
(NJ.com) Obvious Mets fans demonstrate that there is a sucker born every 869 seconds, and not just because they are excited about being 3 up with 22 to play (9)
(NYPost) Misc Jason Giambi cuts his eye after hitting his head on a bathroom door. Mustache reportedly ok (16)

Thu September 04, 2008
(NYPost) Dumbass Man impersonates Joba Chamberlain to try to get free food and booze, blows out shoulder (8)
(Yahoo) Spiffy Vancouver Canucks to raise Trevor Linden's number 16 to the rafters (18)
(Some Guy) Cool "This must be Thursday," said Eli to himself, sinking low over his center, "I never could get the hang of Thursdays." This. Is. Your Thursday night NFL season opener thread. Waaaay late (242)
(ESPN) Ironic The third sign of the sports apocalypse: Bill Simmons picks the Jets as one of this year's best NFL teams (32)
(Major League Baseball) Weird How good are the Angels? They don't even care if their hitters strike out on 4-2 counts (10)
(Free Press) Asinine Lions have one the greatest passing QB they've had in decades, so they commit to running more passing plays (160)
(Yahoo) Spiffy Montreal Canadians have announced an outdoor game in Olympic stadium in 2009. Meanwhile, the Maple Leafs have announced open public tryouts (31)
(Major League Baseball) Spiffy Red Sox to set record with 456th straight sellout. Man, it is wicked crawded (49)
(Yahoo) Sad Cochran Motor Speedway closes indefinitely after the "fans can keep any debris that lands in the stands" promotion goes awry (6)
(ESPN) Cool Minor leaguer waits 19 years in the minors before hitting his first home run. Disney movie contract being send Fed Ex right now (30)
(ESPN) Strange Jered Weaver injured by freak staples accident. If only that damn easy button actually worked (7)
(NFL.com) Unlikely Tom Brady practices in full pads today, and says he could've played in all 4 preseason games. Riiight (77)
(ESPN) Hero On the verge of becoming one of the top 20 passers in NFL history: Jon Kitna? (50)
(Sports by Brooks) Weird In space football, no one can hear you scream at the ref, or Rex Grossman for that matter (11)
(Pro Football Talk) Fail Daunte Culpepper has retired. Good night, choke man (66)
(Yahoo) Followup No, CC Sabathia, you can't have a no-hitter. Not yours (26)
(Yahoo) Obvious Cubs lose fifth in a row... yep, still September (82)
(ESPN) Silly In today's NBA news, LeBron James loses a game of H-O-R-S-E to a warehouse worker. No, really (26)
(Dallas News) Video Kansas native and Dallas Cowboy, Terence Newman, goes on first rollercoaster ever, hilarity ensues (66)
(Baltimore Sun) Cool Middle of the road college football team changes starting QB. Why is this news? The new guy is the son of the drummer from RATT (92)
(ESPN) Obvious Brett Favre "honored" to be named as one of the captains for the Titanic (25)
(Major League Baseball) Interesting Instant replay used for first time in history of the MLB. Umps view definitive proof that ARod did in fact hit another meaningless 9th inning homerun when the game was not on the line (54)

Wed September 03, 2008
(Kansas City) Dumbass Darrell Arthur and Mario Chalmers kicked out of the NBA's rookie transition program after being caught with marijuana in their hotel room (26)
(Nashville Scene) Obvious Local reporter shocked, SHOCKED to discover that Vanderbilt's higher academic standards for athletes might make the school less competetive than other SEC teams. Duke sucks (34)
(Free Press) Obvious Suspended Michigan RB will play Saturday. False indignation from Buckeyes to ensue (49)
(AP) Asinine The Marlins fight for their playoff life in a crucial game against the Braves in front of a home crowd of...600 (51)
(Sports by Brooks) Obvious Chicago will host the 2016 Olympics - Oprah commands it (36)
(AP) Asinine Oklahoma City's NBA team will be known as the Thunder. Da duh duh duh duh da duh (74)
(Oxford Press) Amusing Rich Rodriguez is already making excuses for when Michigan -- the winningest program in college football history based on lots wins over club teams back in the 1800s -- start another season at 0-2 (42)
(CNN) Obvious It's that time again. Here's week No. 1's NFL power rankings (109)
(ESPN) Followup LSU vs Troy game postponed until November due to Hurricane Gustav. Damage to Tiger Stadium includes torn awnings over club seats, litter in the stands and a damaged fence. Cue the tipped plastic deck chair pic (22)
(NYPost) Obvious People are lining up for a chance to swing a wrecking ball into Yankee Stadium (18)
(ESPN) Cool Brewers take advantage of recent Cubs mini-slump. Just kidding, they got swept at home by the Mets (45)
(News.com.au) Amusing Meanwhile, in Australian Rules Football news: "One female patron, who did not wish to be named, said Fevola's costume -- a pink nightie with a matching pink hat and a sex toy penis -- was in bad taste" (8)
(ESPN) Obvious Tarvaris Jackson will be back on the field in time to show just how easily an awful QB can turn a potential conference champ into a 7-9 team in a bad division (33)
(CNN) Cool Mike Gartner will be the fourth Washington Capital to have his sweater retired, joining Labre's red, Hunter's white and Lewinsky's blue dress (24)
(Yahoo) Spiffy Kansas City Royals DH Billy Butler drives in four runs in one game, doubling team's season total (15)
(Deadspin) Video CFL receiver attempts to catch the attention of NFL scouts by putting on a Spider-Man mask and prancing around the end zone after scoring a touchdown (42)
(Orlando Sentinel) Florida Reporters calling in for teleconference with Central Florida coach George O'Leary get better quotes than they could ever hope for (10)
(ESPN) Sappy Dear Yankees: Have we told you how much we love and respect you guys lately? Good luck tonight. We're all rooting for you. Love always, Red Sox Nation (103)
(USA Today) Obvious Cubs lose Zambrano in the fifth, then the game in extra innings, their fourth straight game. Subby checks calendar... yep, it's September alright (55)
(IndyStar) Obvious Chicago Bears CB Devin Hester hopes to christen new Indianapolis stadium by returning the opening kickoff for a touchdown (63)
(Major League Baseball) Strange Last night at the Cubs and Astros game, Jim Edmonds showed us his version of the hidden ball trick. With video goodness (25)
(Cincinnati Enquirer) Dumbass Ocho Cinco to world: "I have a lot of making up to do." World to Ocho Cinco: "You have a lot of shutting up to do" (30)
(NJ.com) Interesting Will some guy named Favre overshadow a guy who just won the Super Bowl? (106)
(Yahoo) Cool Old and busted: 2008 Chicago Cubs playing like 1908 Chicago Cubs. New hotness: 2008 Chicago Cubs playing like 2007 New York Mets (60)
(ESPN) Unlikely The day when Jay Cutler stops sucking and might actually be good is coming sooner than later (30)
(NJ.com) Silly Coming in '09: Joba Chamberlain to be a reliever, then be a starter, then get hurt and finally be a reliever again (26)
(ksdk.com) Stupid Various athletes attempt to drive a golf ball across the Mississippi River from platform below St. Louis' Arch. Seeing as that would require a 560-yard drive, you can pretty much guess the results (24)
(Some Football Guy) Fail Outgoing RB Tatum Bell exacts revenge on incoming RB Rudi Johnson by stealing his bags, making him play for Detroit (17)
(Major League Baseball) Obvious Just days after Carlos Zambrano was scratched due to a "tired arm," Rich Harden to skip scheduled start "as a precaution." Cubs front office clearly asking Mark Prior and Kerry Wood for other vague names for arm injuries (37)

Tue September 02, 2008
(NASCAR) Fail Mr. Ashley Judd is headed back to the IRL in '09 (33)
(CNN) Cool Ohio State and Georgia are yesterday's news. Guess who's #1 now... that is, until they choke on themselves again (80)
(Telegraph) Asinine Reason it sucks to be a soccer fan #27: it's illegal to drink a beer and watch the game at the same time (26)
(CNN) Obvious Two members of the Jamaican Olympic track team received shipments of HGH. Followup tag would've been used, but slowed down over the final stretch to not look so suspicious (21)
(Sports by Brooks) Cool Canadian college football team snaps 49-game losing streak. That's about 36 games American (23)
(MMA Frenzy) Spiffy Grumpy old man vs. Penis-tattoo monster. Brock Lesnar to face Randy Couture for the UFC Heavyweight Championship on November 15 (69)
(BBC) Obvious If you bet that the first Premiership manager of the season to leave his post would be Kevin Keegan, you may collect your winnings at the turnstile (31)
(CNN) Cool Tiger Woods expecting another one-in-hole (34)
(ESPN) Obvious Steve Spurrier likes his 'cocks Smelley (23)
(Some Guy) Obvious Toronto Maple Leafs to trade defenceman Bryan McCabe to Florida, plans to replace him by tossing a pylon on the ice every few shifts, figuring no one will notice the difference (69)
(ESPN) Asinine ESPN found the real scapegoat for Michigan's loss to Utah: The ACC (85)
(CNN) Fail Congratulations SEC. You're 3-0 vs 1-AA... and 0-1 vs the Pac-10 (171)
(Major League Baseball) Spiffy Cliff Lee becomes MLB's first 20-game winner and improves to 20-2 for the season by pitching a complete game shutout on Monday. And yet, you drafted Fausto Carmona in your fantasy league (37)
(NYPost) Obvious $200 million payroll + $141 million in lost tax revenues for missing the post-season + brand new stadium = NY Yankees (82)
(Chicago Tribune) Spiffy Chicago Cubs reliever Carlos Marmol on pace to set record for fewest hits allowed per nine innings, will work toward other obscure records in 2009 (37)
(ESPN) News Jaguars OT Richard Collier is fighting for his life after early morning shooting (36)
(ESPN) Spiffy Drew hits for the cycle. Is there anything beer can't do? (7)
(BBC) Interesting The final day of the English Premier League's transfer window sees Berbatov move to Man Utd, Saha shift to Everton, Robinho spurn Chelsea for Man City(?) and Spurs add both Pavlyuchenko and Corluka. Sorry, Rafa, no Gareth Barry for you (113)
(ESPN) Cool Greg Maddux ties Roger Clemens for eighth all time for wins. Except Maddux did it without steroids and 14-year-olds (42)
(ESPN) Amusing Tennessee intercepts UCLA's quarterback four times in the first half and still manages to choke the game away (65)
(Major League Baseball) Dumbass Roger Clemens' asshat son Coby, who plays for the Houston Astros Single A club, gets arrested for disorderly conduct (19)

Mon September 01, 2008
(Some Guy) Dumbass Matt Millen, genius GM, had this to say about a player he just traded away: "he'll be the NFL defensive player of the year." Obvious tag would also like a mention (55)
(ESPN) Interesting The last three years, the team leading the A.L. on 9/1 has gone on to appear in the World Series whereas the team leading the N.L on 9/1 those three years has failed to get to the World Series. That means no title for you, Cubs. Book it. Done (59)
(FanNation) Amusing Meanwhile, back in Morgantown ... The Rodriguez-less Mountaineers rolled past Villanova, 48-21, as Pat White threw five touchdown passes (71)
(NYPost) Obvious Like Boy George hitting rock bottom, Yankees seek solace in Coke and a guy named Chad (11)
(People Magazine) Obvious Jeff Gordon needs you to know that his second wife is hot (31)
(Yahoo) Sad "Carl Pavano is more popular right now than A-Rod. Think about that" (44)
(ESPN) Amusing Kentucky defense (14 points) outscores Kentucky offense (13 points), Louisville offense (0 points), Louisville defense (2 points) (97)

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