If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
GoogleWeb Fark
These links may be stale and generate errors. Can't do much about it. Tastes like chicken.

(Headline T-Shirts are still available for archive links.)
Sun August 31, 2008
(AZCentral) Cool Shoring up for their playoff run, the Arizona Diamondbacks trade for the shortest, scrappiest former World Series MVP ever made (39)
(Free Press) Amusing Michigan offensive coordinator Calvin Magee: "What did I see? Nothing. A lot of not executing. A lot of things we expected and hoped didn't happen but was worried might happen." (80)
(Sports by Brooks) Unlikely The reason UFC champ Quinton Jackson went on 3-day "delirious" rampage that resulted in multiple felony charges? Energy drinks (20)
(JSOnline) Asinine CC Sabathia no-hit bid broken by....the Pittsburgh Pirates' scorekeeper (33)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Aussie hottie athletes still haven't figured out Facebook, and we're all the better for it (12)
(AP) Obvious Carlos Zambrano's arm completely useless by September (16)
(Mirror.co.uk) Obvious Why British sportswriting is better than American sportswriting: They're not afraid to call their misbehaving primadonnas "toerags" and suggest they need to be slapped around a bit (11)
(ESPN) Cool After proving that he is now only running on the grass instead of smoking it, the Dolphins have given Ricky Williams a contract extention and pay raise (26)
(ABC News) Asinine Protip: If you want your daughter to play football, don't enroll her in a private Christian school in Georgia (29)
(Houston Chronicle) Obvious Texas A&M football starts down the road to recovery in true Aggie fashion (33)
(News.com.au) Spiffy England wins gay soccer world title. Wait... isn't that redundant? (17)
(NASCAR) Obvious Kyle Busch wins again. This isn't a repeat of the 500 times you've already heard that this year (26)
(The New York Times) Amusing Richie Sexson's legacy as member of New York Yankees: Trying (and failing) to organize clubhouse fantasy football league (9)
(Cincinnati Enquirer) Sad Bengals release Tres Dos y Siete Uno (28)
(Some Rasslin Fan) Sad Wrestling legend Killer Kowalski dies at 81. It was real to him, dammit (32)
(ESPN) Cool JoePa earns Reason #373 for you to stay off his lawn (28)

Sat August 30, 2008
(Yahoo) Cool The question mark regarding USC's offense has been answered with an exclamation point. Ohio State beware (40)
(ESPN) Obvious After not having the strength of schedule to be considered for the BCS championship game, Hawaii opens the 2008 season at Florida. Let's see how that turned out (29)
(NJ.com) Interesting New York Giants sign 44-year old kicker John Carney, now have both remaining Tecmo Super Bowl players on their special teams (15)
(Sports Network) Obvious Kurt Warner tells Matt Leinart to get off his lawn. Leinart shrugs his shoulders, picks up a keg and heads for Tempe (28)
(Yahoo) Amusing Rich Rodriguez begins to earn his millions (97)
(MSNBC) Obvious Not news: Man busted for pot at Lil' Wayne concert. Faulk: It's the running back for the New England Patriots (19)
(Buffalo News) Amusing Cut Day for the Buffalo Bills doesn't shake Youboty. Shake shake shake. Shake shake shake. Shake Youboty (29)
(MSNBC) Interesting Decathlon champ says Phelps is a poor little girly-man, alone in his girly-house (283)
(BBC) Cool Hundreds of Subarus from around the world form convoy tribute to Colin McRae (7)
(ESPN) Cool Will Rich Rod be able to get his first win on day one? Will Terrelle Pryor prove to be a star or a bust? Will Gustav terrorize the defending Champs? It's your College Football opening Saturday discussion thread (1139)
(Examiner) Dumbass Cincinnati Bengals thinking of trading Rudi Johnson for guy with healthier hamstring and longer rap sheet (25)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Bud Selig hand-picked underfunded McCourt family to take over Dodgers to prevent another gigantic large market payroll; One problem though, what if they go broke? (21)
(Canada.com) Unlikely Toronto Blue Jays borrow a page from Maple Leafs, give up on making playoffs this year but vow they're going to win it all next year (21)
(BBC) Spiffy Winning more individual gold medals than any other woman at the Olympics? That gets you $100,000. Fark: In a suitcase (23)
(London Times) Stupid Italian court orders one team to pay damages to another team's fans for thoughtless banners which may have hurt their feelings (14)

Fri August 29, 2008
(AJC) Cool Georgia unveils new mascot. Say hello to the adorable UGA VII (65)
(ESPN) Interesting ESPN ranks the fan base of every NFL team. "Your team is ranked too high" arguments to the right (151)
(Deadspin) Interesting Kid achieves rare negative vertical while catching baseball from the stands (25)
(BBC) Followup Internet-owned soccer team sells player for $280k following online vote; Dimitar Berbatov awakes clutching his heart (11)
(Sports by Brooks) Dumbass Newest Yankee wearing #91 in honor of Dennis Rodman; Clubhouse attendant already readying round of tetanus shots for team (10)
(New York Daily News) Interesting Knicks trade the corpse of Frederic Weis for Patrick Ewing, Jr. Really (15)
(Yahoo) Interesting Phillies acquire Stairs from Blue Jays, hope to acquire Escalator next week in three-team trade (26)
(CNN) Cool Beat Michigan = Profit. The Sweater Vest gets a $1M raise (81)
(Yahoo) Amusing Stoner clocks fastest free practice time at San Marino GP, celebrates with Funyuns and Hostess lemon pie (20)
(CNN) Interesting Unemployed QB Daunte Culpepper says he wouldn't mind playing for Green Bay. At this point, he wouldn't mind playing for the Arena League, the Arena League 2, or the Walmart Greeters Flag Football League (28)
(TSN) Dumbass Montreal Canadiens to retire Patrick Roy's jersey. St. Patty plans on celebrating by ripping a door off its hinges and sending his son out to assault the repairman (22)
(Yahoo) Obvious MLB admits that AJ Pierzynski is a douche bag (41)
(700 WLW) Amusing Chad Johnson legally changes his name to Ocho Cinco. Bengals call his bluff and change his number to 87 (112)
(Some Guy) Obvious Glasgow gets first professional basketball team, adding yet another item to list of things that Scotland has and Memphis doesn't (10)
(SFGate) Interesting Will Appalachian State make it two season-opening upsets in a row and knock off #6 LSU ? (bonus pic of Superman Armanti Edwards flying through the Michigan defense) (52)
(Spike) Silly Stop the presses, there are drunk chicks at a Cubs game (89)
(UPI) Interesting 30% of U.S. men think sex is better after their football team wins, the other 70% just tape a picture of dreamy Brett Favre to their wife's forehead (29)
(Orlando Sentinel) Strange If you can't be a Viking, this is a good way to be sent off (26)
(New York Daily News) Obvious We haven't even started the regular season and New York media is already calling the Jets' first-round pick a bust (17)
(Yahoo) Spiffy Houston Texans WR Harry Williams -- who left last Friday's preseason game with cracked vertebrae and severe ligament damage in his neck -- is walking again (11)
(ESPN) Sad Red Sox playoff hopes pay a visit to Dr. James Andrews (48)
(Chicago Sun-Times) Amusing Roger Ebert gives Jay Mariotti two thumbs down and one middle finger up (75)
(Yahoo) Stupid If you try to leave your seat during "God Bless America" at Yankee Stadium, you will be forcibly removed. Let freedom ring (video news story) (84)

Thu August 28, 2008
(Jalopnik) Sad Phil Hill, one of the best race car drivers evar, is dead at 81 (35)
(Sports by Brooks) Audio Tennessee Titan and former USC Trojan LenDale White asked in ESPN interview about Titans upcoming season. Response: "Ohio State sucks" (with audio) (59)
(Sports by Brooks) Followup 3rd Coastal Carolina football player arrested this week. Guess the Chanticleers match up well with Penn State after all (14)
(Daily Stab) Spiffy Sexy Olympic beach volleyball gold medalists Kerri Walsh and Misty May-Treanor do Letterman (49)
(Yahoo) Cool Detroit foster kids flown to Louisville to meet privately with Muhammad Ali. Foster kids were thrilled, but Ali was literally shaking with excitement (21)
(BBC) Spiffy Official Champions League draw results discussion thread (17)
(Livingston Daily) Amusing Michigan QB Steve Threet, on the RichRod spread: "It's a work in progress. It's just coming out everyday and not worrying about the things you can't control and just trying to get better." Translation: We suck at it (38)
(Some Guy) Hero Novak Djokovic may have only won a bronze at the Olympics but he walked away with the real prize, Paraguayan javelinist Leryn Franco (photos of Franco are marginally SFW) (20)
(WTMJ) Spiffy Brewers prove that Bronze the Fonz Night...and good baseball once every 26 years...can actually bring fans to watch (19)
(Ohio.com) Cool The Cleveland Cavaliers are preparing to make a move to acquire "Dwyane Wade. Or Chris Bosh. Or Josh Howard. Or Amare Stoudamire. Or any of the other big-name NBA guys who can become a free agent in 2010. Don't laugh." (41)
(ESPN) Followup Pacman reaches 10,000 points, earns an extra life (48)
(Yahoo) Dumbass Hank Steinbrenner gives the New York Yankees a much-needed pep talk to boost team morale and keep their playoff hopes alive. Ha ha, no... he rips them yet another new one in the media (483)
(SFGate) Amusing Oakland Raiders coach Lane Kiffin: "Hey, let's try Michael Bush at fullback." Next day: "Michael Bush is not a fullback." (40)
(Yahoo) Cool Not for lack of trying, Indians bullpen doesn't surrender enough runs to blow the lead. Cool: For the 10th straight game. Fark: Still 2 under .500 (28)
(Chicago Tribune) Unlikely Ever wonder what it'd be like if the White Sox crept into the World Series against the Cubs? This writer does, and doesn't like it (92)
(Yahoo) Amusing Lowest-rated player in Madden NFL '09 gets chance to start this week (59)
(Major League Baseball) Cool Red Sox give Yankees the Byrd (77)
(Yahoo) Ironic Not News: Bullpen blows lead in Mets-Phillies Game. News: It's the Phillies Bullpen who blows it (31)
(Deadspin) Cool MIT grad invents "unbreakable bat". Upon hearing the news Louisville Slugger buys all prototypes and hides them with the electric car (46)
(ESPN) Dumbass Sign $66 Million contract with Warriors then injure yourself and miss the start of the season. It's enough to make you start huffing spraypaint (15)

Wed August 27, 2008
(ESPN) Cool Sakic resigns with the Av's. Get off his pond (33)
(Sports by Brooks) Followup One reason why Michael Strahan stopped any thoughts of a comeback - he didn't want his ex-wife to get half his paycheck (20)
(ESPN) Dumbass Apparently Shawne Merriman stayed in a Holiday Inn Express last night. He's ignoring the advice of every doctor he has seen and will play with two torn ligaments in his knee this year (80)
(Some Guy) Hero Jay Mariotti's former editor: "We wish Jay well and will miss him -- not personally, of course -- but in the sense of noticing he is no longer here, at least for a few days." (32)
(Chicago Sports) Obvious Barack Obama isn't the only one who thinks Cubs fans are drunks. Derek Lee agrees (69)
(ESPN) Interesting Manny Pacquiao to jump two weight classes, will face de la Hoya at 147 pounds on December 6th (16)
(Detroit News) Cool One more thing college freshmen entering this year have never experienced: An NHL without Chris Chelios (29)
(Yahoo) Obvious Baltimore Ravens ask doctors if injured QB Kyle Boller will be able to throw a football once his shoulder heals. When told that he could, they reportedly said, "That's great because he couldn't *before* the injury" (44)
(Major League Baseball) Followup Video of A.J. Pierzynski and the best flop since Fosbury. Bonus: White Sox announcers see, after 5 replays to the contrary, exactly where offense occurred (146)
(Reuters) Obvious Coach says Bolt could have run 9.52 100 if he hadn't moonwalked last ten meters (51)
(ESPN) Sad Look for Eli Manning to return to pouty chinstrap-shrugging form as Strahan decides to stay retired (56)
(Some Guy) Obvious 7 ways Duke sucks (18)
(The Tennessean) Spiffy Take a peek inside Keith Bullock's locker complete with flat screen TV, laptop, and speakers with subwoofer "for that extra bass" (w/video) (12)
(SLTrib) Amusing Total number of games started by the entire Michigan offensive line? Fifteen. Thirteen by one player (70)
(Kansas City) Amusing KC releases K Jay Feely one day after signing him. Sprint executives in awe of Chiefs' layoff efficiency (28)
(Spike) Cool The top 10 sexiest moments in Olympic history (mildly NSFW images) (64)
(ESPN) Interesting Over-hyped vs. over-the-hill: Kimbo Slice set fight Ken Shamrock on October 4th (84)
(LA Times) Interesting All around the NFL, knees are popping faster than a basement-dweller getting freaky with bubble wrap (24)
(NYPost) Obvious After a Red Sox victory, and the Yankees are on the rim of being eliminated from serious playoff contention, A-Rod says he's up for the job (73)
(ESPN) Obvious Tampa Bay Buccaneers downgrade Cadillac Williams to Chevy Nova status (29)
(Philly) Interesting 45-year-old Jamie Moyer wants to keep pitching in 2009, but it might not be in Philadelphia. Perhaps he'll head to Senior Citizens Bank Park (16)
(Yahoo) Stupid Green Bay Packers say they're confident in the two rookie QBs backing up unproven Aaron Rodgers. In related news, Packers announce new team cookbook, "Recipes for Disaster" (31)
(Telegraph) Amusing Man U defender, Vidic, on why he wants to leave Manchester: "Its main attraction is considered to be the timetable at the railway station, where trains leave for other, less rainy cities" (19)
(Yahoo) Stupid The Boston Red Sox acquire Mark Kotsay and his chronic back problems from the Braves to replace JD Drew and his chronic back problems (57)
(Chicago Tribune) Dumbass Chicago Sun-Times sports columnist Jay Mariotti resigns. Ozzie Guillen seen kissing his son on the lips in celebration (35)
(CBS Sports) Fail Mets lead by 7 (runs) with 17 (outs) left and lose. Where have we seen that before? (55)
(Some Guy) Spiffy Cubs improve to 32 games-over-.500, best mark since September 2, 1969. And we all know how that turned out (118)
(ESPN) Cool Cleveland wins 9th straight. 4 horses seen in the distance (29)
(USA Today) Interesting LPGA to suspend players if they don't learn English... wear flannel and Birkenstock golf sandals, start listening to Indigo Girls (27)

Tue August 26, 2008
(Sports by Brooks) Obvious Washington Nationals radio broadcast ratings measure less people listening than ballpark attendance (55)
(Record Online (NY)) Followup Upper-deck Jets fans won't have to pay additional seat-license costs to watch their team go 5-11 every year (20)
(People Magazine) Scary Winning a gold medal for beach volleyball is awesome. Less awesome is what soaking up that much sun apparently does to the face of a 31-year-old (pic) (98)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Have a great time watching Stanford lose all their home games this season, or your money back (11)
(Fox Sports) Amusing Texas Rangers pitcher traded to Minnesota for Hamburger (14)
(Some Conference Network) PSA Not to worry Buckeye fans...You can now watch Ohio State take on top-tier foes like Youngstown State and Troy on Time Warner (70)
(Canada.com) Cool Cool: you're needed as a pickup goaltender for a scrimmage. Cooler: it's for the NHL's Ottawa Sens. Coolest: you're 13 years old (79)
(Yahoo) Followup Cincinnati Bengals WR Chad Johnson has a partially torn labrum, but he's planning to play through the pain until his shoulder pops out and he needs season-ending surgery (94)
(ESPN) Spiffy I hope you like SEC football, because ESPN has TWO BILLION reasons for you to watch every game they play (99)
(Major League Baseball) Unlikely NY Mets announce they've sold four million tickets, probably by using the Base 5 system (33)
(Mansfield News Journal) Interesting Ann Arbor has lots of holes to plug. Must... not... make... whore... joke... (71)
(Yahoo) Amusing Rookie guard Sean Singletary traded from Houston Rockets to Phoenix Suns for D.J. Strawberry, making this the third roster Singletary has been part of without even playing a single NBA game (33)
(Beyond the Track) Asinine Richard Childress will be starting a new race team, so that team will need to qualify well for the first five races, right? Wrong. He's going to buy another team's points (35)
(ESPN) Obvious Chad Pennington tabbed to lead the Dolphins to their first loss against Brett's Jets on September 7th (76)
(ESPN) Hero Obama on Cubs fans: "You go to Wrigley Field, you have a beer, beautiful people up there. People aren't watching the game. It's not serious. White Sox, that's baseball." (Video interview with Stuart Scott) (208)

Mon August 25, 2008
(Sports by Brooks) Dumbass Parents now buying sperm of athletes for offspring; What kind of athlete would sell his sperm? His last name probably rhymes with Wanseco (37)
(CNN) Spiffy There is a very strong chance that both the Yankees and Red Sox could miss the MLB playoffs this year. ESPN analysts shocked and dismayed at prospect of having to talk about other teams (91)
(Daily Mail) Amusing Sports reporter faces the sack after commenting live on air that one team's defense had more holes than a Spanish airliner (16)
(New Haven Register) Stupid Baseball team disqualified for causing a unhealthy environment. Fark: It's because the 9-year-old pitcher scares other kids with his fastball (213)
(Some Guy) Amusing And the rush for gold medalists to cash in begins. Nastia Liukin decides to make a crappy movie with a gay comedian. Submitter smells Oscar (52)
(The Sun) Cool Now that the Olympics are finally over, we can return our attention to the real pinnacle of the sporting world: the annual bog-snorkelling championships (pic) (29)
(Chicago Tribune) Hero Two winters ago, the Cubs signed a free agent who has 149 RBIs since then. And his name isn't Alfonso Soriano (58)
(Fox Sports) Followup Kyle Busch to Carl Edwards; "I will give you safe passage in the Wasteland. Just walk away and there will be an end to the horror" (49)
(Minneapolis Star Tribune) Stupid Zombie Castro rambles on about attempted bribes and cheating at Olympics, promises beatings (163)
(Newsday) Sad Osi Umenyiora -- or more specifically, his knee -- becomes the 2008 poster-child for the campaign to end the scourge of preseason NFL football (75)
(Deadspin) Amusing Top Ten Reasons Why the Little League World Series Sucks (84)
(Some 5 Ring Guy) Cool Retired olympic events. Who doesn't want them to bring back live pigeon shooting? (375)
(Bitten and Bound) Obvious Michael Phelps has already started spending his projected endorsement money (102)
(New York Daily News) Followup Michael Strahan says he might unretire if the New York Giants "really want me back"... and by "really want me back", he means "pay me $8,000,000 this season" (53)
(Yahoo) Obvious Atlanta Falcons make rookie QB Matt Ryan their starter after he outperformed Chris Redman, Joey Harrington and D.J. Shockley. In related news, the #2 QB will be a rock, and the #3 QB will be the Gatorade jug (37)
(Chicago Sun-Times) Obvious Not News: Umpire blows call, News: It's Doug Eddings again, Fark: And A.J. Pierzynski (82)
(Orlando Sentinel) Spiffy Ten things that would make college football even better. Duke sucks (67)
(ESPN) Fail Reason #896 the preseason sucks: Colts fourth string QB throws four INTs against Buffalo (50)
(The Sun) Obvious After winning five more gold medals than Australia in Beijing, Sydney residents treated to sight of van sporting the Union Jack and the logo, "Where the bloody hell were you?" The Sun is there and classy as always (pic) (55)
(CBC) Amusing Best quotes from the Olympics, including this female fencer descibing defeat: "It's like I imagine being a man. It's like being kicked in the nuts repeatedly, that's how bad it feels" (28)
(ESPN) Spiffy K-Rod picks up 50th save (31)

Fark Sports Forum


Sports Farkives:    Complete archives