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Sun July 06, 2008
(Yahoo) Scary It takes a run by Gregor Blanco to put a 17-inning Braves/Astros game out of its misery (4)
(Pro Football Talk) Sad How far the mighty have fallen: 2005 NFL MVP Shaun Alexander may not be signed by any team for the 2008 season (21)
(ESPN) Stupid Indians send Sabathia to Brewers for three prospects and a can of OFF (22)
(TSN) Amusing Lowe fires back at Burke: "He won a Stanley Cup? Great. I've won six Stanley Cups, you want to count rings?" (27)
(Daily Mail) Obvious The U.K. takes a hard look at itself: "This frenzy over the winner of a junior tennis tournament reveals what sad losers we are these days. For the country to be clinging to a 14-year-old for sporting salvation is pathetic" (5)
(ESPN) Interesting Red Sox-Yankees discussion thread, ESPN's Sunday Night Baseball game at 8:09pm EDT (476)
(ESPN) Cool Three Cubs, four Red Sox announced as starters for the 2008 MLB All-Star game at Yankee Stadium (146)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Olympic javelin thrower resorts to Zubaz-styled Lycra and throwing every possible object you can imagine to stay relevant. He wishes he had thought of throwing Wimbledon first (13)
(Yahoo) Dumbass Roger Federer snatches defeat from the jaws of victory today in Wimbledon men's final (106)
(CNN) Followup Even after all the finagling, whining and international intrigue, Ronaldo won't play anywhere for the start of next season (6)
(CNN) Dumbass Bush: Do not insult our Chinese overlords (83)
(Orlando Sentinel) Florida Sports columnist complains that NASCAR is too confusing (62)
(ESPN) Misc "He'll be able to stretch it out, he'll be able to move it. If he can't sit on the toilet tomorrow, he's got problems." Need I say more? (9)
(Google) Interesting Tennis player admits to taking a dive in the Wimbeldon womens finals against Martina Navritalova in 1983. This is not a big deal because one, nobody bet on women's tennis then and two, Navritalova was playing in the wrong final anyway (35)
(ESPN) Interesting In an effort to seem more like a sport, NASCAR allows substitutes (19)
(F4WOnline) Cool Hell freezes over: Ultimate fighter winner Forrest Griffin, UFC Light Heavyweight Champion (76)
(Some Racing Guy) Cool Kyle Busch captures win in exciting finish at Daytona International Speedway (33)
(News Of The World) Obvious Arsenal finally admit what everyone has known for three years: they are a selling club and need to sell one player a year just to break even. Hmmmm, develop and sell a player or simply take on £700m in debt, which is worse? (31)
(ESPN) PSA Slamming your bat to the ground in frustration looks good to the fans in the stadium and TV, but it isn't smart if the bat shatters and you go on the 15-day DL (25)

Sat July 05, 2008
(ESPN) Followup Remember that story on racer and "Dancing with the Stars" winner Helio Castroneves possibly switching to NASCAR? Nevermind. He agreed on a long term deal to stay in IndyCars (23)
(Some Octopus-chucker) Obvious Gordie Howe explains the problem with the NHL is "there are so many dang teams" (39)
(BBC) Asinine Just when you thought the world couldn't come up with a more stupid sport than NASCAR or curling, we present the World Mountain Bike Bog Snorkelling Championships (w/ pics) (19)
(Major League Baseball) Asinine Yankees not interested in making it into the post season (255)
(YouTube) Cool The ultimate And-1 mix tape. Wait, is some of that stuff even legal? (62)
(Yahoo) Obvious Williams beats Willams to take Wimbledon Women's Singles. Venus (50)
(ESPN) Cool Eight gold medals for one American swimmer? A 41-year-old MILF setting a record by qualifying for her fifth Olympics? It's more likely than you think (24)
(Baltimore Sun) Asinine Tour de France will be drug-scandal-free this year on account of they disqualified the top 250 riders from competing (27)
(Yahoo) Misc Forget Russian supermodels who happen to play tennis; it's the Williams sisters dukin' it out in the ladies' final at Wimbledon. Discussion to the right (9am ET, NBC) (119)
(ESPN) Interesting The Colorado Rockies make up a 9 run deficit, beating the Florida Marlins 18-17 with a 2 point conversion in the bottom of the 9th (19)
(Boston Globe) Cool Johnny Damon almost catches ball hit by Kevin Youkilis, ball comes to rest on top of fence at Yankee Stadium (48)
(TSN) Sad Leave it to the NHL to ruin July 4th by losing one of it's biggest stars to Russia (49)

Fri July 04, 2008
(Seattle Times) Amusing You know all that fuss in the news about how Seattle residents were going to be upset if they lost the Sonics? Turns out, they actually don't really care (19)
(Sports by Brooks) Weird Balls to the groin, homoerotic bat shavings - just another Phillies broadcast (11)
(Wordpress) Amusing "The New York Post is like a fat kid locked in a candy factory right now" (13)
(Free Press) Sad The fat lady finally sings (18)
(Cycling Weekly) Cool On the eve of the 95th Tour de France, Google maps unveils "street view" of the entire 21-stage route. Lance already checked it out. And he beat you through it (16)
(Sports by Brooks) Cool Nike's new U.S. Olympic track and field outfits have a certain Flo to them (25)
(Fox Sports) Followup Lenny Kravitz insists that he has standards (28)
(ESPN) Silly Wizards give Arenas about as much money as it would cost to build one (21)
(Metro) Obvious Professional soccer player attacks nightclub bouncer with handbag, perpetuates every soccer player stereotype there is (57)
(Newsday) Stupid New York Rangers say goodbye to Jaromir Jagr, any chance of winning the Stanley Cup (64)
(OANews) Amusing You know it was a hell of a party when it take 25 years to find your pants (9)
(Cincinnati Enquirer) Strange In a frantic bid to fill column inches, it is discovered that the last soldier killed in the Revolutionary War is buried right where Pete Rose's 4,192th ball landed (13)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Apparently Dwyane Wade isn't in (the newest Miami Heat player) Michael Beasley's fave five, else he might return his calls (24)

Thu July 03, 2008
(TSN) Sad Not content with stealing the cup from the Canucks 14 years ago; New York Rangers sign their captain, Markus Naslund (71)
(ESPN) Interesting Brian McNamee submitted syringes and bloodied gauze pads to federal agents, claiming that Roger Clemens' DNA will be identified on those items. Looks like Clemens will be taking it in the butt one last time (33)
(SFGate) Weird Oakland A's sign pregnant 16-year-old male Dominican wax statue with no arms to be their pitcher of the future (with bizarre, disturbing pic) (16)
(Dallas News) Amusing Why failing to adopt the DH rule is killing the National League. Officially licensed MLB tin foil hats available here --> (86)
(AP) Weird Williams woman wearing white will whip weak-willed wench, win Wimbledon when weekend wanes. Wenis (19)
(Yahoo) Interesting Harris and Bickerstaff? Del Negro, please (12)
(Yahoo) Interesting All-Pro wide receiver Randy Moss buys 50% of a NASCAR Truck Series team, which will now give a 50% effort unless there's a realistic chance of winning the series championship (29)
(NHL) Interesting Fleury re-signs with Pittsburgh Penguins. Clause regarding health coverage for injuries occuring before he even steps on the ice strangely absent (35)
(Some Guy) Amusing China to kill Olympic terrorists by making them laugh to death (10)
(TSN) Amusing Satan decides to call Pittsburgh home, which isn't all that surprising to anybody who's ever been there (61)
(ESPN) Sad Soccer team pranks teammate with roman candles shot into bedroom. It's probably the last time they pull that one (20)
(Some Guy) Obvious "All you minivan drivers, football freaks - those of you who say that NASCAR is not a sport-ought to go out and try it. Once you've driven 325 laps at Texas, maybe then you'll understand" (105)
(Kansas City) Dumbass Who among us hasn't "held 'drafts' of young female employees with whom they would want to have sex"? Kansas City Wizards employees, you can allegedly put your hands down (59)
(MDN) Strange Japanese high school baseball federation says players should avoid hyperbaric oxygen capsules, as they cause side effects such as turning white, noses falling off (5)
(Some Guy) Amusing Wayne Gretzky's (hot) daughter has a thing for golf (75)
(TSN) Amusing Mats Sundin says he appreciates all the offers put forward, but he just isn't ready to make a decision about his future at this time. Translation: No matter how much money Vancouver offers me I will never play for them (46)
(The Scotsman) Amusing Revolutionary new incentive scheme for rugby players: turn up to training, get free beer; win games, get free beer. Expect this team to win the next World Cup (7)
(Hockey Buzz) Stupid The Toronto Maple Leafs, no strangers to ineptness, may have blown their free agent money by mistakenly signing the wrong player (35)
(Newsday) Ironic Everyone whose wife hasn't run off with Lenny Kravitz, take one step forward. Not so fast there A-Rod (44)
(Speed) Interesting NHRA Top Fuel and Funny Car races will now be 1000 feet in duration instead of the quarter mile standard (19)
(NewsOK) Survey The Oklahoman wants to know what the Sonics should now be called. What's your suggestion? (VE) (201)
(The Tennessean) Hero Fox NASCAR commentator Darrell Waltrip donates car to Iraq war vet who was scammed on Craigslist. No word on whether car can make right hand turns (20)
(ESPN) Amusing Sweep (169)

Wed July 02, 2008
(Gothamist) Interesting Controversy is brewing at the annual Nathan's Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest as Kobayashi returns on a sponsor exemption (30)
(Canoe) Amusing WWE's Chris Jericho on why he doesn't have a career highlight DVD released yet: "I think they are getting ready to do a Funaki DVD... it will probably come out at the same time as the Nunzio retrospective" (76)
(Sports by Brooks) Unlikely Sports radio host says he once dated current Playboy playmate. Veracity of his claim in dispute, as his credit card receipts from time of relationship have not yet been made available to the public (8)
(King 5) News Say hello to your Oklahoma City Sonics (158)
(Major League Baseball) Cool MLB All-Star votes are producing the closest races in years: Ryan Braun in near-tie with Fukodome, with Matt Holliday and Ralph Nader well behind both (20)
(AP) Obvious Michael Beasley injured during first NBA practice. Greg Oden raises eyebrow, says, "Man, is that guy soft" (15)
(Free Press) Dumbass Michigan's Kevin Grady gets a DUI. Coach Rich Rodriguez, known for producing fine and upstanding citizens such as Pacman Jones and Chris Henry, nods approvingly (40)
(JSOnline) Cool You're a tease, Favre. A dirty, dirty tease (91)
(ESPN) Obvious Cubs waste a good start by Jason Marquis; lose to the Giants. Which is unfortunate, since a good start by Jason Marquis is as rare as the spice that controls the universe (26)
(TSN) Strange Since Hossa couldn't beat them, he joined them (231)
(Fox Sports) Followup Having already signed a $72 million contract with $35 million guaranteed, rookie Matt Ryan can now comfortably appreciate Roger Goodell's viewpoint from his satin-pillow adorned gold-and-marble mountain hideaway (20)
(USA Today) Strange Giant catfish chokes on football in German canal, is immediately signed by Manchester United (15)
(Boston Globe) Obvious Q: Why would the Patriots release CB Willie Andrews while the Cowboys give Pacman Jones yet another chance? A: Talent (35)
(JSOnline) Dumbass Taking the first step in replacing Favre in their hearts, Aaron Rodgers tells Packer fans to "get on board now or keep their mouths shut" (62)
(Home Run Derby) Cool Homer Simpson threw out the first pitch at a baseball game. Pittsburgh Pirates immediately offer him a one-year contract (30)
(KTVB.com) Video Last second faceplant gets 800-meter runner onto U.S. Olympic team (36)
(New York Daily News) Strange ♪ I am the very model of a modern major-general ♪ I call the fouls intentional and technical and personal ♪ (20)
(Yahoo) Stupid NFL stadium bans standing, so all four of you Chiefs fans sit down (97)
(IndyStar) Obvious Indiana University's president feels the hiring of Kelvin Sampson as coach was a mistake (27)
(ESPN) Cool Baron von Clippers (23)
(NESN.com) Interesting The first place Rays stay another day, keep the Sox at bay (118)
(News.com.au) PSA <-- ǝɹǝɥ uoıssnɔsıp ɹǝpıɔǝp uıƃıɹo ɟo ǝʇɐʇs ,sǝnƃɐǝl ʎqƃnɹ (69)
(AZCentral) Scary Worst baseball injury ever: Fractured left testicle (63)
(Sports by Brooks) Stupid Best Chinese basketball player not named Yao in hot water with Olympic team after meeting his "pop singer girlfriend" at a nightclub. In other news, China has pop singers (25)

Tue July 01, 2008
(Yahoo) Followup Sad: Barry Bonds' final home run ball has been placed in the hall of fame. Awesome: It really was branded with an asterisk (68)
(CNN) Cool Phillies demote Brett Myers to AAA. You're fillin' in for somebody, arent' you? Boom. Outta here (47)
(Sports Humor Blog) Followup Willie Andrews released by Patriots following his arrest. Captain Obvious clears room on the bench for another warm body (12)
(NASCAR) Obvious Dario Franchitti, IRL superstar, NASCAR failure. And apparently submitter can haz NASCAR tag (31)
(AP) Scary Tiger's left knee will be healthy for the first time in his professional career (34)
(Yahoo) Stupid MLBPA files grievance, says Houston Astros didn't have "just cause" to release pitcher Shawn Chacon after he slammed GM Ed Wade to the ground by his throat (43)
(AP) Interesting 756* will not be in the Hall of Fame (41)
(TSN) Spiffy Your official NHL free agency day discussion thread (611)
(New York Daily News) Unlikely A-Rod will skip the Home Run Derby because he's afraid it might mess up his swing. Of course, his first-round eliminations in three previous attempts had nothing to do with his decision (43)
(Some Guy) Interesting The art of the cupcake schedule: A look at which teams are scheduling the most creampuffs in college football (214)
(Yahoo) Obvious Elton Brand and Corey Maggette opt out of contracts with Los Angeles Clippers, hope to sign with a team that actually has a chance of making the playoffs some year (34)
(News.com.au) Dumbass Justin Gimelstob trash talks Anna Kournikova. You've never heard of Justin Gimelstob? Exactly (32)
(ESPN) Interesting As if Hendrick Motorsports doesn't dominate NASCAR enough already, Tony Stewart wants to take over Casey Mears' ride (36)
(Yahoo) Cool Cubs become first team to win 50 games in the NL this season (102)
(Some Soccer Guy) Cool Swiss architects release artist renderings of new $1.2 billion green football stadium for Portsmouth FC. Want (25)
(SeattlePI) Dumbass Hundreds of Seattle runners show up for a 6:45 a.m. bus for the 7:00 a.m. marathon. What could possibly go wrong? (40)

Mon June 30, 2008
(BBC) Dumbass Premier League player to receive suspended sentence after admitting he beat the everloving piss out of a teammate. No, not ... oh wait, yes, that one, sorry, of course (15)
(ESPN) Dumbass Roger "the crybaby commish" Goodell cries that his $30 billion league is too poor to pay its employees and the owners will go on strike in 2011 if wages aren't cut (63)
(London Times) Obvious Traditional Chinese medicines may contain substances banned by Olympic regulations, deer penis (6)
(Sports by Brooks) Amusing Lenny Dykstra's L.A. house is too big: "I can go for a couple of days and not see any other family members" (21)
(ESPN) Florida Nobody thought they'd hear this at the end of June: "Sit this one out, Yanks: It's a Red Sox-Rays discussion thread" (48)
(Yahoo) Cool American backstroke swimmer gets her world record broken, reclaims it in the very next heat. Girls, it's just Olympic Trial heats, you don't have to try so hard (24)
(ESPN) Obvious Aramis Ramirez asks for time off to take care of a "personal matter" in the Dominican Republic. In other news, the Personal Matter Cockfighting Series continues in the Dominican Republic (26)
(Sports Humor Blog) Dumbass Pats' DB Willie Andrews arrested for pointing gun at girlfriend's head. Stay classy, New England (28)
(Radar Magazine) Weird A-Rod and Madonna are dating? (27)
(ESPN) Obvious It's just Manny being Manny, or in this case it's just Manny being a jackass (97)
(Globe and Mail) Obvious Attendance at ball parks remains good, but fewer fans are spending $5 for a crappy hot dog and $8 for a warm, flat beer (75)
(Yahoo) Dumbass Baltimore Ravens CB Derrick Martin attempts to bring three bags of marijuana through Cleveland Hopkins International Airport. Since you're reading it here, you can guess how well that went (39)
(USA Today) Followup AL dominates NL yet again, 149-102. B-b-b-bu-but, the Phillies pounded the Red Sox that one time (76)
(ESPN) Interesting Atlanta Braves third baseman Chipper Jones ready to opt for the George Brett method of chasing .400 (47)
(Boston Herald) Stupid The NBA may have blown its free agency load in 2007. Get ready for such blockbuster deals as Chris Duhon for one year at the veteran minimum (21)
(Yahoo) Interesting Chicago Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano declares himself ready for a short stint on the non-disabled list (33)
(Yahoo) Obvious With the Los Angeles Lakers already well over the salary cap limit, their focus is on re-signing Sasha Vujacic, Ronny Turiaf and maybe a few other guys whose names nobody can pronounce (16)
(Sports by Brooks) Cool Chicago beer vendor that works both the Cubs and White Sox games has a much cooler job during the offseason, saving the world by himself (10)
(ESPN) Interesting The dismantling of the Pittsburgh Penguins gets a head start with Ryan Malone agreeing to a contract with the Tampa Bay Lightning before the free agent period has even begun (55)
(Some Guy) Ironic It's good to see Cubs and White Sox fans working together... to beat the crap out of some guy (with video punchiness) (33)
(AJC) Followup UGA is the only school that buries its mascots within the confines of the stadium. In a specially built marble vault, no less (56)
(Austrian Times) Obvious Swiss television stations broadcast banned Nazi anthem for Euro match. Oddly, some had a problem with this (11)
(ESPN) Obvious Sox sweep Cubs. Book it. Done (85)

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