Warren Sapp has meltdown, gets three back-to-back unsportsmanlike penalties followed by an ejection	(6)
		15-0	(20)
(Pittsburgh Post Gazette)		The Immaculate Reception: NFL's greatest play of all time happened 35 years ago today	(23)
(Some Guy)		Sideline reporter gets a good scare after coach goes crazy during halftime interview	(26)
		Despite Greg Oden's knee rehab being "so far ahead of what we expected it’s not even funny," Blazers GM claims "He will not. Come. Back. This. Year."	(10)
(Some Guy)		Margaret Thatcher's grandson is next great star of American Armoured Wankball. Plus he's better looking than Tom Brady, if such a thing is possible	(22)
		Kobe Bryant reaches 20,000. No, it's not how many times he asked to be traded	(6)
		Roger Clemens* says he feels as numb as Mets fans did after the pumped up Yankees beat them in the 2000* World Series	(60)
		Fan at Pacers-Wizards game last night made security look like Roger Clemens' legal defense team - until player's dreaded foot sweep (with video)	(12)
(Some Guy)		Less than four months since sustaining a severe spinal cord injury on the same turf, Bills tight end Kevin Everett arrives at Ralph Wilson Stadium	(59)
		"The LA Times has learned that Kobe Bryant is now happy and committed to the Lakers forever or until they lose five in a row, whichever comes first."	(7)
(Some rod & reel guy)		You knew it was only a matter of time: Fantasy fishing Web site offers roto geeks yet another way to lose money and waste time	(8)
(WCPO)		Finally a Judge gets his priorities straight. Trial put on hold until after The Sugar Bowl	(11)
		If you hope to break the World Record for anything you have exactly 52 years left to try	(26)
		Charity raffle called "Burn the Bear" will allow a drunk bar patron to pour 151 proof rum on a stuffed brown bear's toes and set him ablaze. This will end badly	(6)
		Kobe Bryant expresses his undying admiration for Isiah Thomas; That and $8 will get him an Eggnog Latte at the corner Starbucks	(6)
		Cowboys win, but TO watches second half while receiving emergency Vagisil application to his left ankle	(30)
(Some Guy)		High school football coach hasn't won a game in four years, whines when fired	(16)
		Miroslav Satan scores his 666th career point	(42)
(Some Guy)		“The heavyweight division is full of circus fighters”	(7)

		Someone you never heard of did something totally unimportant in a sport no one in America cares about	(22)
		Bobby Bowden's last victory was his three-hundredth at Florida State. His next might be his 294th	(20)
		Philadelphia Eagles coach comes clean on his family's dealing with his dirty sons	(7)
(E! Online)		If Tony Romo performs so poorly with one Jessica Simpson in the stands, imagine if there were thousands?	(89)
		NHL's epic fail of the week	(28)
		Parent outraged when Precious Little Snowflake sees boobs and booze at NFL game	(82)
(Burlington Free Press)		The New England Patriots are apparently being renamed The Greater Boston Patriots	(40)
		Another thing wrong with MLB : Bud Selig could be baseball commissioner for life	(24)
(Rivals.Com)		Let's see, today we have the Papajohns.com Bowl, the New Mexico Bowl and the Las Vegas Bowl. Looks like the "honey do" list is getting ignored once again	(39)
(NY Daily News)		Isiah Thomas and Quentin Richardson attempt to reenact the Billy Martin Reggie Jackson fight in the Garden is Burning	(28)
		Arsenal coach wants fans charged and punished for verbal abuse of players, coaches, and referees at matches. Apparently even soccer millionaires are delicate little sunflowers	(19)
		Sens. Patrick Leahy (D-VT) and Arlen Specter (R-PA) say that they will work to end the NFL's anti-trust exemption if the potentially historic Patriots-Giants game Dec. 29 is not made available to all viewers	(65)
		The Top 10 "Rarities" in the NHL	(56)
		Blazers make it 10 in a row, suck it Boston	(25)

(Some Race Fan)		Who should be in the NASCAR Hall of Fame and how they should be selected?	(46)
(Some Guy)		Ever wonder why the Titans play in Nashville and not Memphis? Well, Nashville can thank 50,000 Steelers fans	(26)
		The last ball used during the World Series will lose its value if your dog eats it	(8)
(Fan Nation)		Morten Andersen will still be kicking in the NFL long after you are dead	(15)
		Arsenal confirm that they will join the David Beckham experience	(16)
		Naming rights to Wrigley Field may be up for sale soon. What should the new name be? VE	(121)
(Some Guy)		"The campy faux-brutality of pro wrestling might seem odd during the Christmas season, but the ancient fighting style and the birthday of the baby Jesus actually have quite a bit in common."	(31)
		Carmelo Anthony scores 37, Allen Iverson scores 36, and Anthony Carter a mere six, but it's Carter's last-second shot that gives the Denver Nuggets a 112-111 double-overtime win over Houston	(6)
		Having led the New England Patriots to 14-0 record, cured the lame, and brought eyesight to the blind, Tom Brady named AP Male Athlete of the Year	(25)
		Denver Broncos kicker Jason Elam's first published novel combines football, terrorism, and spying -- just like a New England Patriots game	(12)
		♪ Like a surgeon ♪ Testifying for the very first time ♪ Like a sur-ur-ur-geon ♪ As the steroids stay in prime time ♪	(2)
		Despite Atlanta's poor season, RB Warrick Dunn wants to go out a winner in '08. Could somebody please tell Dunn that the trade deadline has passed?	(13)
		It's not news, it's your Champions League/UEFA Cup final 16 draw. Arsenal v. AC Milan, Celtic v. Barca, and more	(49)
(Hockey Fights)		Syd the Kid Crosby gets in his first NHL fight. Bonus: Completes the Gordie Howe hat trick in the first 25 minutes	(35)
		Female couple and male accomplice bind and sexually assault 3 UNC football players after a drunken romp in downtown Chapel Hill. The goggles, they did nothing	(129)
(NY Daily News)		Jason Grimsley affidavit unsealed - Roger Clemens not mentioned after all	(22)
		Australian Rules footballer hospitalized when he swallows a beer cap. I thought those guys were supposed to be hardcore	(41)
		New Jersey arena will finally be able to turn a profit now that the NHL team has left	(12)
		Marian Gaborik scores 5 goals as Minnesota Wild win over NY Rangers	(43)
		What happens when you're 10-0, and finally get around to playing a real opponent ? You guessed it - Duke Sucks	(36)

(The Enemy)		The odds of a good Super Bowl halftime show just went up	(77)
(Sportsline)		Day one of the nineteen day football orgy that is bowl season. Discuss and drink in here	(88)
		Hot chick shows boobs during Grizzlies game during crowdcam on the Jumbotron. Safe for work	(198)
		NFL rejects Pacman’s appeal of suspension	(14)
(Some Guy)		Sixty-one photos of Virginia Tech's coach Seth Greenberg's daughter. Brought to you by The Department of It's a Slow News Day in Anchorage. Disclaimer: Flash player	(57)
		England collapses at yet another international sporting event. There's a headline that will never be retired	(26)
(Some Guy)		College bowl predictions -- let the computer do my thinking	(71)
		Big 10 to probe referee's alleged history of bankruptcy, casino gambling, poor eyesight	(13)
		Stuart Scott enters hospital for appendectomy, leaves with cancer	(66)
		Top 10 incidents of things thrown on the field/rink/pitch/diamond in sports	(66)
		Who leaked information that Bill Parcells was negotiating with the Falcons? Parcells did, so he could get a better deal from the Dolphins. It's exactly how he's done it in the past	(31)
		Tom Osborne to remain athletic director for the big dead machine until 2010	(14)
		Whoever had December 19th in the Tracy McGrady injury pool, step forward and claim your money	(6)
		Bill Belichick congratulates New England Patriots on going 14-0 and locking up the No. 1 seed for the playoffs. No, not really... he spends 45 minutes of team meeting tearing everybody a new one	(78)
(NY Daily News)		New York Islanders deny that forward Chris Simon has substance-abuse issues, insist his latest suspension is purely because he's a giant douche	(23)
		How an undrafted free agent became the starting left tackle for the AFC Pro Bowl team	(32)
		Terrell Owens claims comments about Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson were just a joke. In other news, Jay Leno wants T.O. to write an opening monologue	(137)
		"FSU doesn't just need a new coach. It needs new direction, a new philosophy. It's time to wipe the slate clean and start over. A new president, a new coach, a new identity"	(56)
(KPTV)		Tony Parker files suit against site that alleged he cheated on wife Eva Longoria. Tony's testicles still tenderly tucked in Eva's totebag	(20)
		Bill Parcells agrees to four-year contract with Miami, becomes first Tuna ever caught in a Dolphin net	(38)
		Terrell Owens wants Jessica Simpson to stay away from his man, Tony Romo. No comment from Jeff Garcia	(43)
		"Big 3" get exposed on their home court by "Mr. Big Shot." The road to the NBA Finals still runs through Detroit	(55)
		Final-out ball from 2007 World Series gone to the dogs -- more precisely, Jonathan Papelbon's dog	(18)

		Pro snowboarder Shaun White faces criminal charges (surprisingly not for drugs)	(20)
(Some Guy)		Donovan McNabb is angry at sideline reporter Pam Oliver and her sweet, sweet ass	(43)
		Beleaguered Falcons owner releases terse statement about being jilted by Bill Parcells: "He later informed us that he would not be signing a contract with us"	(19)
		NFL fines Denver Bronco $5,000 for cheap shot on special teams play. Three weeks later, the league docks a second Bronco player $7,500 for "throwing snow"	(18)
		List of MLB players in the Mitchell Report who statistically benefited from using steroids	(31)
		Writer names Tom Coughlin the NY coach/manager with the most successful current tenure, which is kind of like naming the least infectious STD	(29)
		Celtics new "Big 3" is changing the perception that the Celtics are a "white team." Apparently drafting the first black player, having the first black starting five, and hiring the first black coach wasn't enough	(75)
		What did William "The Fridge" Perry get for Christmas? His two front teeth, a bunch of molars, some more front teeth and a few incisors	(20)
		New York Islanders forward Chris Simon gets 30-game suspension, breaking the previous record of 25 held by -- you guessed it -- Chris Simon	(57)
		Kansas football coach Mark Mangino named AP Coach of the Year after eating all other candidates	(58)
(Toronto Sun)		Todd Bertuzzi ended Steve Moore's career because he was afraid coach Marc Crawford would be mean to him	(66)
		Mikki Moore calls out Sacramento Kings coaches for something, no one is really sure why or who he is	(8)
		Donovan McNabb will be back for another tour with the Eagles so long as Joe Walsh keeps his mouth shut	(24)
		Champ Bailey knows what it's like to be the only gay eskimo	(38)
		"Integrity" is the biggest loss in the baseball steroid scandal. This assumes baseball had any integrity in the first place	(15)
		What's five percent of $300 million? Scott Boras' severance pay	(17)
(MLB)		Roger Clemens may get to describe his masterful steroid-injecting techniques to those high school coaches after all	(58)
		Brazilian soccer superstar Romario banned 120 days for doping	(18)
		Headline: "Kobe to Chicago trade didn't happen for many reasons." Translation: "Chicago didn't want to give up an all-star for a giant douchenozzle with an ego the size of a planet"	(41)
		NFL teams set modern record as 60 different QBs have started games this year. Ummm... way to go?	(53)
(Some Guy)		Fan to present "world's largest pink slip" to Isiah Thomas	(19)
		In Green Bay, Packers knit caps are this year's Tickle Me Elmo	(72)
		Manchester United defender Jonny Evans arrested for rape	(38)
		Pete Rose thinks players who use steroids and other performance-enhancing drugs are "making a mockery" of baseball. And if there was ever an expert on making a mockery of baseball, it's Rose	(65)
		Senior swatter shudders at sound of Sharapova shrieking	(10)
		Big Tuna strongly considering trying his hand at Atlanta Falconry. Rodents beware	(15)
		Louisville basketball coach Rick Pitino reaches 500-win mark. Duke sucks	(9)
		Minnesota Wild coach Jacques Lemaire wins his 1,000th game. That's a lot of bubblegum	(9)
(New York Daily News)		If you held up a sign that said "EAT FOOD" or "BREATH AIR", Madison Square Garden probably wouldn't care. But hold up a "FIRE ISIAH" sign and they start getting cranky	(29)

		Yankees' traveling secretary fired for tax evasion instead of being traded to Tyson's Chicken	(17)
(LiveNews)		Breaking News: 20 year old Russian tennis star tied up and robbed at OMG YOU CAN SEE RIGHT DOWN HER SHIRT	(37)
(TSN)		Legendary Canadian sportscaster Don Chevrier passes away	(16)
		Vitale's vocal chords fine after surgery; America weeps	(22)
		Michael Jordan puts on a jersey and practices with the Bobcats. In other news, there is apparently an NBA franchise called the Bobcats	(18)
		Tebow scores yet again. This time, it's AP Player of the Year	(16)
		Washington Redskins safety Sean Taylor, killed during home invasion, named as NFC's starting free safety for Pro Bowl	(80)
		Woman's request for restraining order against Washington Nationals outfielder Elijah "Wifebeater" Dukes dismissed when she mysteriously fails to show up for court. Dukes sucks	(6)
		Some Week 16 NFL Power Rankings for you to argue over. Seriously, Steelers two spots over Seahawks?	(79)
		Sports Illustrated says the fans are to blame for the MLB steroids problem	(47)
(Some Guy)		Spergion Who? The six QBs drafted over Tom Brady	(28)
		Florida State Criminoles suspend 20 football players from upcoming bowl game for cheating on exams. Submitter remembers when they used to be able to recruit a higher quality of thug that never got suspended for this kind of stuff	(51)
		NBA power rankings show the Celtics are No. 1 in the East	(40)
		Indiana Pacers motivated by guarantee that Eddy Curry didn't make	(8)
		ESPN will move into L.A. broadcast facility in 2009; Bristol employees already hatching elaborate escape plans	(24)
		Seabass to stay with Sharks. That's a 6'3", 17 stone, bearded, French, rugby-playing madman named Seabass	(24)
		From the same man who brought you the morbidly obese goalie: Can Andy Roddick beat you with a frying pan?	(14)
(Sporting News)		Mike Nahrstedt gushes over NFL god and Sportsman of the Year Tom Brady. This article would either make Peter King uncomfortable or horny	(26)
		♪ Alouette ♪ Gentil alouette ♪ Alouette ♪ Trestman plumerai ♪	(8)
		Tom Coughlin admits he shouldn't have called 52 pass plays against the Redskins, says 62 was probably the right number	(128)
		Lloyd Carr on Rich Rodriguez: "You're getting the same kind of guy." Considering that RR just had an awful loss at home to WVU's rival, Ohio State fans approve this hiring	(43)
		Dick Vitale yells about Duke until his throat breaks. Duke still sucks	(31)
(Some Guy)		Carling Cup quarter final showdown, Blackburn v. Arsenal; get stuck in	(79)
		Los Angeles Dodgers sign admitted HGH user Gary Bennett, use Mitchell Report as toilet paper	(17)
		Chicago Bears the latest team to succumb to the dreaded "Super Bowl loser curse" after failing to play in the NFC West	(42)
		Brian Roberts was unfairly included in the Mitchell Report. Oops, wait... never mind	(24)
		With the playoffs out of reach, Baltimore Ravens turn to rookie QB Troy Smith to give him valuable experience. Ha ha, no... they're sticking with Kyle Boller, concussion and all	(36)
		LeBron James becomes youngest NBA player to reach 9,000 career points. That leaves him a little over 29,000 behind Kareem Abdul-Jabbar	(16)
(Some Guy)		Proving beyond reasonable doubt that they don't have a sense of humor, German police investigate Michael Schumacher's recent adventure behind the wheel of a taxi	(6)
(Some Guy)		Player in World Dart's Championship says, "I'm blind in my right eye and I'm right-handed and that means I can't really see what I am doing"	(5)
(FOX Sports)		A-Rod, Boras not speaking to each other. Also thinking of seeing other people, returning matching "BFF" charms	(16)
		BCS denies proposed Oklahoma/Virginia Tech matchup, because it might have damaged the legitimacy of pulling two teams out of their ass to play for the national championship	(46)
		NFL suspends Cowboys safety Roy Williams for violating the 'Roy Williams' rule	(109)
		A NASCAR driver pushes you to the ground; do you C) sue him because the minor abrasions you recieved have kept you out of work for the past month	(28)

		Nick Saban reportedly contacts West Virginia about football opening, confirming his sick, twisted flaming couch fetish	(43)
		Having congratulated all other teams that actually won something, Congress passes resolution honoring the Colorado Rockies	(17)
		Michael Dell a potential buyer of Miami NFL team. Dolphins would become first club to send in plays from Bombay	(14)
		Mets raise ticket prices 20 percent, promising to do an even better job of choking next year	(10)
		George Martin walking across America to raise money for Ground Zero victims. Maybe he should do a second walk for Eli Manning's career	(17)
		For some strange reason, school cancels Roger Clemens' speech entitled "My Vigorous Workout: How I Played So Long"	(172)
(Some Guy)		Woman fulfills husband's dying wish by taking his ashes to Steeler game. The way they're playing this year, she's lucky they didn't ask him to suit up and start as a lineman	(97)
(Some Guy)		Priceless video of Isiah Thomas silencing a crowd with a dirty word. Note Bobby Knight's "I'm going to kill you" reaction in the background	(28)
		Mets and Yankees among 11 teams battling to add pitcher Mark Prior to their disabled list	(29)
		The Yankees' word is as strong as oak - Santana to the Yankees is dead. Just kidding...Hank Steinbrenner is folding like a cheap suit. Again	(52)
		Atlanta Falcons offer Bill Cowher their head coaching job, Bill Cowher gives them the dirty bird	(15)
		Celtics on nine-game winning streak despite Ray Allen's usual physical breakdown	(12)
(Some Guy)		How bad is the NFC West? The 6-8 Carolina Panthers swept the entire division. Duke sucks	(34)
		ABC analyst Terry Bowden the front runner for West Virginia job; TV viewers hoping the Mountaineers will consider Lee Corso instead	(37)
		Five Falcons fined $50K for pulling up shirts to reveal "Free Mike Vick" message; Shirt pull-offs apparently inspired by team's pregame visit to Gold Club	(28)
		One determined writer takes on one of life's most interesting questions: "Could a morbidly obese goalie shut out an NHL team?"	(207)
		Today's "Ripley's Believe it or Not" moment: After 32 seasons and 1,865 tries, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers finally returned a kickoff for a touchdown	(19)
		Chicago Bears Lance Briggs is doing the child support shuffle	(15)
		Syracuse guard Eric Devendorf gets squeezed and joins Andy Rautins on the bench for the rest of the season with torn ACL	(15)
		Buckeyes lose first of two national championship football contests. This story will be repeated January 7	(21)
		Buffalo Bills' charter plane stuck in the mud, much like the Bills' performance this season	(9)
		Tony Romo suffers the worst performance of his career so far. Jessica Simpson spotted in a #9 pink jersey (w/pic) at the game. Coincidence?	(119)
		Indianapolis Colts become first team in NFL history to post five straight 12-win seasons	(90)
		Bad news: New York Giants TE Jeremy Shockey broke his leg. Worse news: His mouth still works	(48)
		All NCAA football title games had at least one returning team from the year before	(18)
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