(Some football league)		There was a disturbance in the Force, as if millions of fantasy owner voices suddenly cried out in terror	(10)
		Rams win their first game of the season; 1976 Tampa Bay Bucs pop open a bottle of Old English to celebrate	(17)
(Some Tipped Football)		This official Sunday Night Football thread brought to by Peyton Manning and two interceptions. We now join the broadcast already in progress	(402)
(Sportsline)		The Sex Cannon is back...Sexy Rexy unleashes the dragon, slays the Raiders, and makes all the Raiderettes wet	(35)
		LSU and Oregon take over the top two spots in the new AP poll. Duke sucks	(94)
(Some Guy)		Dear God. Even though you won't Just End The Season I give thanks that the Jets won't lose this week. Yours, Jets fan	(12)
(Some Guy)		Who says Soccer players aren't tough? Wayne Rooney out for a month after injuring ankle playing Tennis	(16)
		Despite their best efforts, the Buffalo Bills fail to break Miami's perfect season. Next week, a chance to redeem themselves and break New England's streak	(21)
(Some Left Turn)		Official Checker Auto Parts 500 Discussion Thread. First time in 31 years a NASCAR Race has 3 Indy 500 winners running	(35)
		For first time in 9 weeks, Patriots fail to win a game	(55)
		Canadians invent "extreme air hockey" featuring leaf blowers, a whiffle ball and rules that prohibit 'aggressive blowing.' "It will be bigger than beach volleyball"	(9)
(The Victoria Advocate)		Remember that cheerleader in Texas who's mom was gonna sue when the little tykette didn't make the squad?	(12)
(Some Guy)		Let's talk REAL football: Calgary Stampeders versus Saskatchewan Roughriders in the biggest CFL playoff game in 20 years. Rouges are expected to be key	(51)
		Divison battles between the Browns/Steelers and Cowboys/Giants highlight this Week 10 NFL discussion thread	(1126)
		With yesterday's loss to Air Force, Notre Dame sets record for the worst season in its history	(36)
(Some Guy)		Good: The Buffalo Sabres are releasing 4,500 more tickets for the Winter Classic. Bad: The tickets are for obstructed-view seats. Fark: You need to find a kid to go with you	(8)
(Some Guy)		Dalai Lama lets the world knows who his favorite football team is. Apparently it's the Winnipeg Blue Bombers. Saskatchewan Roughriders waiting on response from Vishnu	(9)
(Some Guy)		To promote green week, NBC once again gives full coverage of Notre Dame's losing streak being recycled	(16)
		Not news: Navy defeats North Texas 74-62 in a basketball game, News: Navy defeats North Texas, 74-62 in a football game	(11)
		Mark Mangino and the Jayhawks gorge on OSU, fatten their record to a bloated 10-0	(62)

		David Beckham visits Metrodome to play in prestigious Copa Minnesota friendly, apply for job as Vikings QB	(9)
		Three Tottenham Hotspur fans were outraged that Arsenal fans called them "Yids" and are suing. The only surprise is it took this long	(13)
		NFL tells officials to eject players for flagrant helmet-to-helmet hits immediately. So much for that impending cheap-shot on the Patriots	(47)
		Illinowned	(104)
		Not since the original Big Three has the Boston Celtics gone 4-0...well they did it last night. Hell seen getting chilly as a Boston Championship trifecta becomes a possiblity	(160)
		10 worst MLB free agent deals of the last 10 years	(71)
		Does Illinois have what it takes to knock off #1 Ohio State? Can Geogia withstand Auburn and bring order to the SEC? Does anyone still care about USC-Cal? It's footbal time on Fark	(1280)
(Some Wrestling Fan)		WWE catches CNN majorly editing pro wrestler John Cena about steroids. It's not news, it's CNN's version of news	(45)
		Yao meets Yi, goes merciless on the Bucks for a 104-88 victory in front of 18,000 live fans, and 200 Million households worldwide, and the first headline with Chinese in it recently without a recall	(7)
		Torre thinks A-Rod may join Dodgers	(15)
		Welcome to today's Football (soccer) discussion forum. There's a great deal on tap, but none as big as the Tyne-Wear derby, a rivaly that dates back to the English civil war. he he Rump Parliament	(110)
		100 greatest soccer players of all time. Flamewar? Sure It's over there --->	(74)
		Organizers defend allowing Katie Holmes in New York marathon without qualifying. "Does Billy Crystal have trouble getting tickets to the Yankees World Series? No. Do celebrities have trouble getting reservations in hot restaurants? No"	(59)

		Seattle granted MLS expansion team, because basketball worked out so well	(36)
		Miami city officials plan on razing the Orange Bowl then selling it on eBay	(19)
		Bill Simmons compliments the Colts on a good game against the Patriots and disproves the theory that all Patriot fans are whiners. Ha, just kidding he goes on a full article tirade about every non-call against the Colts	(180)
(MLB)		Roger Clemens may pitch for 2008 Olympic team, which means he couldn't be on the 25-man roster of an MLB team	(23)
		Cleveland News website runs "We Hate Steelers Week". Asks Browns fans to submit pictures to show their pride. Turns out there are more Steelers fans than Browns fans. And some of them are actually creative	(94)
		Chan Ho Park, who hasn't had a decent year since he left the Los Angeles Dodgers after 2001, is returning to the Dodgers	(15)
		It's November and the Cleveland Browns have a shot at sharing the AFC North division lead this Sunday. Wait, what?	(87)
		Players union worried that teams might collude to keep A-Rod's price down. Hey, who wouldn't jump at paying him $350,000,000 over ten years?	(60)
		NFL won't put another team in Los Angeles until they replace the Mausoleum	(56)
		Dennis Rodman wants to be a head coach... in the WNBA. Probably doing it just to double the size of his wardrobe	(6)
		Tampa's baseball team changes official name from Devil Rays to Rays. Unable to change players from Bad to Good. In other news: Tampa Bay has a baseball team	(63)
		Washington, unable to end Ottawa's currency value streak, settles for ending their hockey streak	(19)
(Some Guy)		Duke reaches new levels of suckitude, cancels games with U of L, and gets sued for it	(17)
		Not News: hundreds of college students line up to buy hockey tickets. Kinda News: team buys pizza for students. Farking Cool News: the players themselves deliver it	(24)
		T.O. fined $10,000 for waving a personalized towel on the sideline. Dumbass tag goes to the league on this one	(51)
		Eleven MLB free agents named in George Mitchell's steroids probe. Barry Bonds is a free agent. Hmm	(25)
		Vikings dock WR Troy Williamson a game check for missing last Sundays game because of his grandmother's funeral	(37)

(NHL.com)		Eric Lindros announces what everyone has known for the past 5 years. He can no longer play hockey	(42)
		Johan Santana expected to sign a contract extension with the Twins. Just kidding, he'll be on trading block any day now	(52)
		Eight out of eight experts agree: The SEC is the best football conference	(111)
		MLB announces that first and third-base coaches will wear some sort of head protection during games next season	(20)
		NBA commissioner tells Seattle that if they let the SuperSonics move, they'll never get another NBA team. Ever	(35)
		Oakland Raiders with the 27th ranked special teams unit plan on kicking to Devin Hester this Sunday. What could possibly go wrong?	(37)
		Apparently unaware of how much BCS rankings blow, author of the story suggests the NFL should move to a BCS-type post-season. Hey, weren't they trying to figure out a way to have a playoff structure in college ball?	(34)
		Pele says he's not surprised that Beckham is teh suck. More importantly, Pele is still alive	(23)
(Some Guy)		A new psychology study says baseball players whose names start with the letter "K" strikeout more often then other players. How do you explain Adam Dunn then?	(29)
		Three-time IndyCar champion Sam Hornish Jr. officially moves to NASCAR Nextel Cup, joins growing list of top drivers leaving open-wheel racing for open bottles of moonshine	(39)
		I'll see your article about the Angels expressing interest in signing A-Rod with one speculating that the Red Sox may be interested in him. It's not Fark, it's Sportsnite sponsored by Scott Boras	(66)
		Baltimore Orioles prepare for roster to be overhauled. Fans still waiting for owner to be keelhauled	(19)
		Against Indiana, Cassell nets 35, a bucket shy of his age. 4-0 Clippers now lead the conference. Submitter wants some of whatever God is smoking	(22)
		Beckham is looking for a new club (with bonus sexy pics)	(26)
		The newest overpriced, fading superstar that the New York Yankees are interested in acquiring is... *spins wheel*... Baltimore's Miguel Tejada	(18)
(NY Daily News)		Shea what?? Mets GM bends over and begins talks with A-Rod's agent. Still no cure for starting pitching that can't get through the 6th	(16)
		St. Louis Rams RB Steven Jackson says he's fit and ready to play this Sunday. Did anybody tell Steven that the Rams are 0-8 and the only thing left to play for is the #1 overall pick next year?	(36)
		Joba Chamberlain, Phil Hughes, and Ian Kennedy will be not be traded this offseason for anyone, not even Baconator-in-Training Miguel Cabrera	(34)
(Some Guy)		Manny Ramirez celebrates World Series by putting his car up for sale on eBay	(22)
		Don Shula realizes he's a senile old coot, backs off all of that Patriots asterik crazy talk	(103)
		I'll see your Mets bending over to begin negotiations with A-Rod article and raise you one with the Angels expressing interest in signing him	(25)
		Oregon QB has a lot of balls taking billiards class as his only course this year	(66)
(Some Guy)		Soccer star Ronaldo told to stop eating English food because it's making him fat, and if he winds up weighing 300lbs and unable to run more than five yards without gasping, he'll be traded to the NFL	(51)
		Mike Modano breaks Phil Housley's NHL record for career points by an American-born player	(31)
		Former NFL player Luis Sharpe busted at adult bookstore. For smoking crack. Not so Sharpe after all	(12)
		Roger Clemens said to be ready to retire. Until he changes his mind. Then changes it back. Then waits 2 or 3 months to change it yet again	(15)
		Pete Carroll looks at USC's 7-2 record, tells reporter, "We really blew it." No NC State tennis players involved	(10)
		Phillies kick off baseball's "Hot Stove League" by acquiring Brad Lidge from the Astros in a five player swap and some magic beans	(44)
		London unveils stadium its athletes will lose in at 2012 Olympics	(19)
		Kentucky and new head coach Billy Gillispie beaten at Rupp Arena by some team you've never heard of. Duke sucks	(46)

		In perfect storm of suck, Kevin Costner to unveil new Tampa Bay Devil Rays uniforms	(22)
		Classy QB Donovan McNabb takes the blame for his team's dismal state. Just kidding, he throws his whole team under the bus	(68)
		"The Chiefs weren’t disclosing the status of Johnson other than to say he has a sprain of his middle right foot." In related news, Kansas City has been invaded by aliens	(14)
(WCPO.com)		If you had "2 days" for how long recently reinstated Cincinnati Bengals WR Chris Henry would last before a criminal complaint was filed against him, you may collect your winnings now	(32)
		Atlanta Falcons player cleared of felony animal abuse charges. No, not that guy, the other guy. No, the OTHER other guy	(13)
		Patriots to Don Shula: Get bent, old man, and we'll loiter on your lawn if we want to	(125)
		Tom Brady's bunch may soon be on display in Calvin Klein underwear ads	(22)
		Best NFL stadium experiences ranked. Poor Jets fans. Not only do they have to go to Giants Stadium, they also have to watch the Jets	(87)
		Chicago Cubs want to move Ryan Dempster into the starting rotation, move the starting rotation into the dumpster	(17)
		It's your official, official Wednesday Champions League discussion forum. Which superstar team will put 8 goals past some club from a crappy backwater berg?	(48)
		Starting in 2009, the Big East will play an entire basketball season to eliminate nobody. Duke sucks	(29)
		ESPN analyst Barry Melrose had never been to new Newark arena when he slammed building's surrounding neighborhood on-air	(36)
(Some Guy)		A-Rod set to buy Shaq's mansion	(18)
		IOC President Jacques Rogge says Marion Jones' medals will only go to "clean" athletes. In other words, they aren't going anywhere	(4)
(Outsports.com)		Rugger Ben Cohen to have gay-fan appreciation party. No word yet how far he'll go to show that appreciation	(8)
		Ottawa Senators set NHL record with 13-1 start. This is going to make their annual playoff collapse look that much worse	(50)
		LeBron James just misses triple-double with 24 points, 14 rebounds and nine assists. Pass it more, ballhog	(41)
(Some Guy)		How the west was lost: NFC West and AFC West combined to go 0-7 this week	(53)
		Angels OF Gary Matthews to meet with MLB on HGH report, has some 'splaining to do	(3)
		In a rare moment of clear thinking, Chicago Cubs GM Jim Hendry says paying one player $35 million a year for 10 years "doesn't make a lot of sense"	(16)
		Williams F1 team announces new driver for 2008 -- it's the guy who ran over two of their mechanics	(12)
(wbztv.com)		The NFL might be satisfied that there wasn't any extra noise during the Patriots-Colts game, but now a security guard at the RCA Dome says crowd noise is fed back into P.A. system	(285)
		Ohio State becomes the second Big 10 team to get thumped by a D-II school in an exhibition game the past week. Duke sucks	(28)
		Greg Maddux wins record-setting 17th Gold Glove award. Now get the heck off his infield	(35)
		Fading Denver Broncos sign four players, release three. One step forward, two steps back	(25)
(NY Daily News)		Tom Glavine likely to return to the Atlanta Braves and screw up their post-season chances	(15)
		Yankees offer A-Rod a chance to crawl back and prove he's a man. In other news, Yankees expect to get two draft picks from whoever signs A-Rod	(64)
		The average price of a Lakers season ticket is $89.24	(24)
		After MSU loses exhibition basketball game to Grand Valley State, Tom Izzo kicks the whole team out of the brand new locker room and into the weight room	(13)

		No Pacman Jones, you can't play a game this NFL season. Not yours	(20)
		Jones Soda beats out Coke & Pepsi for beverage rights to new Nets arena. Let's celebrate with a tall, cool glass of Turkey & Gravy	(32)
		Dennis Miller returning to sports television. Ah, soon, you'll be able to hear such informed commentary as "Hail Mary pass denied - separation of church and state, baby"	(36)
(myfoxcolorado.com)		Chiefs RB Larry Johnson out for the season	(49)
		For the 4th week in a row, the cover of Sports Illustrated features a Boston team	(61)
		Minnesota Vikings sign Koy Detmer to backup their backup QB who is backing up their other backup QB who is backing up their starting QB who would be a backup QB on any other team in the NFL. Got that?	(32)
		Baseball GMs vote strongly in favor of instant replay. Fans brace for seven-hour games with inane Buck/McCarver commentary	(24)
		Cleveland's Mark Shapiro win's MLB's Executive of the Year. Rockies come in second again, look forward to second place in MVP and ROY	(17)
		ESPN analyst warns Devils fans not to go outside the team's new arena "especially if you got a wallet or anything else" because the area is unsafe. On the plus side, he didn't say anything about nappy headed hoes	(36)
		Jose Guillen and Matt Williams become latest players named in steroids probe, leaving a few thousand players to go	(23)
		With Jake Delhomme on IR, David Carr with a concussion, and Vinny Testaverde with an Achilles tendon injury, undrafted rookie Matt Moore could be the Carolina Panthers starting QB this Sunday	(49)
		Jay Cutler does not join the long list of Denver Broncos who are out for the season, otherwise known as the lucky ones	(29)
		Colts issue statement about piped-in din against the Patriots that does not include a denial	(110)
(Some Chick)		Sexy sports babe Maria Sharapova looks like she's bulked up a bit and will kick your ass	(77)
		Yankees looking into trading for Miguel Cabrera, Adrian Beltre or Scott Rolen to fill the gaping hole left by A-Rod	(50)
		After leading the NHL in concussions for the past decade, Eric Lindros to announce his retirement this Thursday	(45)
		L.A. Dodgers owner at Joe Torre press conference: "It’s sort of the punctuation point to our commitment to winning" (in other words, we won't be signing ARod)	(8)
		Tom Brady's performance enhancing drugs rumor is false. Gisele confirms his "performance" has not enhanced. At all	(25)
		Browns are on cloud 9; this week's power ranks	(112)
		The Baconator's new contract extension has a weight incentive clause	(27)
		Chicago Bulls GM says Kobe trade deal dead, which is why Bryant is reportedly on the verge of buying Michael Jordan's Chicago mansion	(8)
		Jeff Gordon says that Jimmie Johnson is spanking him, although he isn't referring to his fantasies this time	(11)
(UEFA)		Matchday 4 can see some teams seal up their group. Liverpool looking to bounce back after loss to Besiktas. Tuesday's official UEFA Champions League thread	(52)
		Baseball GMs vote to explore the use of instant replay for questionable homerun calls only	(22)
		Atlanta magazine reprints four-year-old puff piece mag did on Michael Vick with newly-added "observations in red handwriting with portions marked out and other changes" (with pics)	(13)
(LA Daily News)		Oddsmakers lay 3:1 odds on Los Angeles Angels of A-Rod	(7)
		Don Shula first of 1972 Dolphins assisted-livers to say a Patriots perfect record should have an asterisk	(115)
		Schilling takes a pay cut and will stay with the Red Sox	(74)
		In a bid to overtake Mourinho for craziest manager in the history of the Premiership, Sir Alex Feguson has come out in support of Affrimative Action quotas for English Football teams	(54)
		Following their daring Cuban escape, Chicago Cubs now facing down Donald Trump	(28)
		Following Sammy Morris' season-ending injury, former New England Patriots RB Corey Dillon began working out in case they called. However, they have no plans to call	(23)
		After ticket server and phone lines crashed within eight hours, Beijing Olympics officials decide that "first come, first served" won't work for them, revert to lottery system instead	(4)
		Police call a foul on former NY Giants cornerback Jeremy Lincoln for roughing the girlfriend	(9)
		New York Mets GM Omar Minaya says the team is looking for pitching help, not A-Rod	(18)
		High school football player cuts his opponents with knife during post-game handshakes	(23)
(Some Baconator)		Barring something outrageous, Curt Schilling will play for the Red Sox next year	(27)
		The ageless wonder Greg Maddux will return for a 23rd season next year, tells young pitchers to stay off his mound	(20)
		Era comes to an end as Sher-Wood stops making wooden hockey sticks. Tearful Canadians gather to remember the first time they took a cross-check to the face from a non-composite stick	(43)
		Yankees' PR nightmare continues as Pettitte declines 2008 option. Posada, Rivera set to own part of team by Thanksgiving	(37)

		Forsberg pulls out, fans left unsatisfied. Premature speculation suggest he's spent	(15)
		Hockey legend Guy Lafleur gets an assist in helping his son score. Unfortunately, it's with a 16-year-old girl, and his 23-year-old son is facing criminal charges of sexually assaulting a minor	(22)
		Will the Ravens choke once again on national TV when they play the Steelers on MNF?	(177)
(Fox Sports)		Charlotte Bobcats beat Miami to start the season 2-0, are 2 games above .500 for the first time in team history	(11)
		After leaving yesterday's game with a concussion, Minnesota Vikings QB Tarvaris Jackson greets coach Brad Childress today with "Hi, I'm Donovan"	(8)
		Tests show that Cincinnati Bengals WR Chad Johnson's neck is okay, and he should be able to do more touchdown celebrations in the future... if he ever scores another touchdown, that is	(9)
		Naval Academy cadets granted a day of shore leave to celebrate their teams long-awaited victory over Notre Dame	(17)
		John Russell named as newest Captain of the Titanic	(5)
(WCBS 880)		Is it really a smart idea to sell 'engraved bricks' to Mets fans?	(7)
		Sensitive sports stars may skip Beijing Olympics over poor air quality. Human rights abuses apparently are not quite as irritating	(46)
(Gregg Henson)		Watch Chad Henne get tackled by a goalpost as you wonder how he can walk and chew gum at the same time	(35)
		CBS blames noise during Colts game on dead 9 volt or something	(121)
		Don Mattingly and Larry Bowa will be joining Joe Torre on the Los Angeles Dodgers coaching staff	(7)
		There's no defense for Nebraska coach Bill Callahan snubbing Tom Osborne after 76-39 loss to Kansas (with video)	(12)