Meet the worst racehorse trainer in the world, having gone zero-for-385 and hasn't had a winner since 1996. “He’s becoming the Eddie ‘The Eagle’ Edwards of racing," notes colleague (pic)	(2)
		Georgia beats Japan with a walk-off homer to win the Little League World Series	(21)
		BoSox outscore ChiSox 46-7 over 4 games. Thanks to new commericial partnership, that means 46 Baconators for Schilling	(9)
		A growing number of golfers protesting ever increasing mandatory cart use rules. Suck it slow pokes	(38)
		Old guy kicks young guys ass at UFC 74, stay off his lawn	(26)
		"You're not even a beat reporter, you're a fill-in, you don't know anything about baseball... you're retarded." Response: "Can you even spell 'retarded'?"	(308)
		It's the official week 3 Sunday English Premier League discussion forum, featuring Newcastle and a battle from the bottom of the table in Man U and Tottenham	(35)
		Sam Hornish to run 5-6 NASCAR Cup races this year to prepare for fulltime in 2008	(23)

		Cincinnati Reds finally get the nucleus of a decent team together	(34)
(Some white guy)		Boise State hero who proposed to his cheerleader girlfriend after epic win over Oklahoma needs security at the wedding. Not from angry OU fans, but because he's black and his fiancee is white	(83)
		Falcons to Vick: "We'd like you to give us back the $22 million in bonuses that we already paid you"	(46)
		Welsh soccer coach in Spain's second division is sorry he ever told his players to speak Spanish to him. "Some of the words are unpronounceable when you’ve got a set of teeth like mine"	(6)
		Damon Huard selected to be Chiefs starting tackling dummy	(30)
		Five moments under the lights that made all rednecks cry aloud as one; Your Bristol 500 thread	(133)
(Some Guy)		It's your official Saturday, week 3, English Premiership discussion forum; Arsenal, Liverpool, and Chelsea are on tap	(73)
(Some Guillen)		Not News: Tigers beat Yankees, 9-6. News: With a walk-off, 11th inning home run. Fark: At 3:30 a.m	(315)
		Greg Maddux just won his tenth game in a season for the twentieth season in a row; Suck it, flamethrowers	(30)
		Bucs' wideout David Boston arrested for DUI, in other news, David Boston is still playing football (With hilarious video pic)	(28)
		Seattle Seahawks owner Paul Allen has sold his private 757. As a result, the team will now fly on a Hawaiian Airlines 767. Sure, they might have less legroom, but they'll get more windows	(10)
(Some Storm Trooper)		NFL predictions through the eyes of a Star Wars geek	(72)

		The Atlanta Braves release closer Bob Wickman because "He wasn't a team player"	(32)
(Some guy who likes to turn left)		Another F1 driver thinks about heading to the left-turn series	(41)
		"Little leaguers should be paid $1,000 per TV game to play." Are you playing because it's fun? There's no playing because it's fun in baseball	(19)
		Reggie Miller ends talk of a possible NBA comeback. Somebody tell Spike Lee before he hangs himself	(12)
(Some Puckhead)		Buffalo Sabres and Pittsburgh Penguins to play New Years Day outdoor hockey game in the Buffalo Bills' stadium. Which definitely won't be needed for football in January	(55)
		Ye olde baseball is making a comeback. No haberdashery allowed	(38)
		NY Knicks guard Stephon Marbury attempts to clarify his comments regarding Michael Vick and dogfighting. Nope... still dumbass	(47)
		Former NBA player Eddie Griffin was trying to overcome alcohol addiction shortly before his death. Missed it by... that much	(24)
		Michael Vick's father says he asked Vick to stop the dogfighting, and that people should stop sugarcoating what Vick did. Suck it, NAACP	(104)
		David Wells signs with Dodgers after clearing waivers	(400)
		Step 1: Get Michael Vick trading cards. Step 2: Feed them to your dog. Step 3: Profit	(13)
		Facing the prospect of an empty stadium for another David Beckham home game, LA Galaxy blames nearby commuter college for forcing them to "limit ticket sales" on a school day	(44)
		Spurrier suspends South Carolina quarterback for skipping class. This is code for: watch film, stay safe, and we play UGA in week 2 so get your head out of your ass	(32)

		Former Lakers coach Butch van Breda Kolff has earned his final technical foul	(3)
		Curt Schilling ponders free-agent future; whether you're gonna eat the rest of that bacon cheeseburger	(252)
		Eric Gagne doesn't regret accepting a trade to the Boston Red Sox, and doesn't mind having his car lit on fire every night after games, honest	(46)
		Fulham Football Club, in a shocking move, signs an American. Hero tag enlisted because it's the only one with an American flag. America, f*ck yeah	(27)
		The greatest sport beatdowns in history. Who doesn't love No. 27?	(202)
		Sports Illustrated releases the most politically correct list of the famous body parts in sports. Just stop at No. 1, it doesn't really get any better	(89)
		Time's running out if you want to see the ghost baseball players walk out of the cornfield and onto the real life Field of Dreams	(13)
		Just as I suspected... Tottenham are the reason the English national soccer team sucks	(16)
(The Hawkeye Compulsion)		Those two Iowa WRs who were arrested on felony charges concerning misuse of a credit card put up some classic pics on their Facebook page. Followup tag throws down a gang sign and Dumbass tag flees in terror	(63)
		Oklahoma fan rips scrotum from Texas fan's body for wearing Longhorns shirt in a bar	(71)
		Jerome Bettis said he lied about a knee injury. But he could be lying about that too. Just ask his wife, Morgan Fairchild	(35)
		Casino giant Harrah's to build 20,000-seat arena in Las Vegas to lure NBA or NHL team. Submitter offers 1:3 odds that the NHL is dumb enough to actually put a team there	(31)
(NY Times)		Peyton Manning thinks ex-players who join the media are sell-outs, ranking just above idiot kickers	(95)
(3 downs for 10 yards guy)		Will Mike Vick begin training beavers when the NFL suspends him? CFL says no, get off my lawn eh	(7)
(Stamford Times)		Andy Rooney on why sports bore him: "Today's baseball stars are all guys named Rodriguez to me." Cue "¡Ése es racismo" kid	(60)
		Seattle Supersonics co-owner fined $250,000 for saying he'd like to move the team to Oklahoma City	(17)
		Brandon Webb's scoreless inning streak stopped at 42. More importantly, he got the win	(12)
		U.S. basketball team finally finds a country whose ass we can still kick	(16)
		Bob Kraft starts the pity party for Falcons owner, suggesting sympathetically that all football players are dirtbags. "It could happen to any one of us"	(35)
(cracked.com)		Nine moments more wretched than steroids in baseball; includes Pedro's midget, Albert Belle and Ty Cobb	(31)
		Fark's seasonal article strikes again. Productivity to definitively decline due to Fantasy Football	(28)
		Mike Hart: "My freshman class, how can we say that we're the best class in history when we haven't beat Ohio State?"	(36)
		Scotland wins international sporting event. Now there's a headline you never ever thought you'd see	(14)
		After having the Premier League put the kibosh on his plans to transfer to rival Liverpool, Man United's Gabriel Heinze is now off to Real Madrid. Cona de sabão	(16)

		It's a boy for Bridget Moynahan and Tom Brady. It's expected the Patriots will make the baby their #1 pick in the 2028 NFL draft	(18)
		This may go down as one of the greatest shellackings in baseball history	(301)
(Some Guy)		John Elway is now a high school football coach	(74)
		Twins throw some cold salty sea water on the Mariners. Yankees and Angels fans breath a sigh of relief	(25)
(Some Beaver)		Portland Beavers, tired of childish jokes about their nickname, ask for fan input on new name. Let's help them out	(102)
		Today's example of how to pick your battles carefully brought to you by the NAACP, which urges the NFL to let Michael Vick play football after his sentence	(144)
		59-year old makes Division III college football team. Better not step on his lawn	(70)
		Official thread for today's international soccer friendlies. How's your country doing?	(66)
		After 20 days, NY Giants WR Plexiglass Burress returns to practice after the menstrual cramping finally let up	(34)
		Latrelle Sprewell's 70-foot yacht, the "Milwaukee's Best", was repossessed Tuesday. When this news got back to PJ Carlesimo, he got a little choked up	(18)
		Brooks Robinson, Ozzie Smith, Willie Mays and Ken Griffey, Jr. among the members of all-time Gold Glove team	(40)
		Jonathan Papelbon invents a new pitch, names it after Bea Arthur	(455)
		"You know, from what I understand, dogfighting is a sport. It's just behind closed doors." -- Stephon Marbury. So just for the record, illegal + closed doors = legal	(517)
		USA Basketball brings in Kobe Bryant in attempt to rape the competition and bring back gold	(24)
		After blasting Vick repeatedly, Peter King now wants to have make-up sex after he realizes he won't get to see him play this year	(22)
(Duke Sucks Tribune)		Rutgers University plans $116 million stadium expansion after one winning season. Future headlines: Rutgers faces huge debt over stadium project after 1-10 season	(54)
		Sphincters tighten all around MLB as former NY Mets clubhouse attendant reportedly named names to Sen. Mitchell's steroid probe	(14)
		Why Canada should have more NHL teams. This is front-page news	(24)
		Dancing Star to wed Dallas Star. He might not be ready for marriage, since he's had only one fight in his entire NHL career (picture doesn't include nudity, but is probably not safe for work)	(40)
		Diamondbacks third baseman ties MLB record for consecutive strikeouts with a double golden sombrero plus one	(11)
		Garret Anderson beats the Yankees like the British should have	(154)
		John McEnroe goes ballistic at umpire and throws tantrum on tennis court. In 2007 (video)	(16)
(Puck head)		On a hot day, this will help cool you off: initial NHL predictions. Heated discussion to the right	(80)
		Nation's most corrupt college football program suspends head coach for two whole weeks after NCAA starts snooping around	(25)
		Cole Hamels is the latest injured Phillie. In other news, Citizens Bank Ballpark will have a hospital wing added soon	(16)
(Some Guy)		Judge calls NFL officials hypocrites for suspending Bengals' Odell Thurman	(41)

		Former NBA star killed after his SUV collides with a freight train in a fiery crash	(119)
		Michael Vick's next opponent may be the Double Jeopardy Clause	(27)
		Kurt Busch gets up on the wheel, pins his ears back, wins at Michigan	(17)
(Some Guy)		David Beckham complains the ground is to hard for him, plays anyway. Good Job Princess	(14)
		Tiki Barber finally gets Eli Manning to come out of his hole, at which point Eli sees his shadow and declares six more weeks of this BS	(23)
		Red Sox get player to be named in Wily Mo Pena deal	(361)
		Game tickets: $50. Engagement ring: $3000. Being humiliated on the Jumbotron by your girlfriend: Priceless	(333)
		Tottenham Hotspur boss a sure bet to be first boss to get axed. Which is why bookies are no longer taking bets	(17)
		Big Papi Selling his MB AMG. Optional accessories include a Johnny Damon Traitor's Card	(9)
		Q: Can Michael Vick come back? A: No one gives a shiat	(71)
		Brewers blank Diamondbacks, move into first place tie with Cubs. Cubs fans sigh and say, "At least they didn't wait until the end of September to break our hearts"	(43)
		Despite crossing the Daytona 500 finish line upside-down on his roof, Clint Bowyer has quietly put together a solid season and finds himself in good position to make the Nextel Cup Chase	(16)
		Note to National League baserunners: Don't challenge Rick Ankiel's arm in the outfield. He used to be a pitcher	(45)
		Chicago Bears QB Rex Grossman shows he's in midseason form as he fumbles three times and throws an interception. Imagine what he could do if he played the whole game	(83)
		Heinze: I has permission to move to Anfield? Premier League: No. You do not has permission. Not yours	(25)
		A-Rod slaps his league-leading 40th homer of the season, but the Yankees still lose	(72)
		U.S. Soccer hottie Heather Mitts plays the field: Seen with pro tennis player James Blake and NFL QB AJ Feeley in same week	(24)
		The players on the Michigan football team tell Chad Henne what they think of him by not electing the four-year starter at QB as one of their captains	(77)
		Brady Quinn's manhandling of the Detroit Lions' 3rd- and 4th-stringers isn't enough to move him up on Cleveland's QB depth chart yet	(29)
		NHL will have at least one sellout next season as St. Louis Blues to provide free food for all fans at one game in January	(37)
(Some Feat)		Bobby Jenks ties MLB record for consecutive batters retired, gives up a hit, then starts new streak. "I am back to three in a row," Jenks said. "Hopefully I can keep it going"	(10)
		Patriots QB Tom Brady vows to attend the birth of his baby with Bridget Moynahan in the morning, beat the Jets in OT during the afternoon, then go home and make wild-monkey love with Gisele Bundchen that night	(36)

		Canadian football fans experience their own Heidi incident. "Questions were immediately raised about a public network giving precedence to a U.S. movie over a Canadian sporting event"	(22)
		NASCAR race at Michigan rained out again today. Race now scheduled for 10 a.m. Tuesday	(34)
(Some Guy)		Famous fan of the Baltimore Orioles passes away at 68. Other Orioles fans reportedly devastated, both of them	(20)
(AOL Sports)		If you're a Miami Heat fan and like to attend games, you might want to stock up on helmets, brass knuckles, and mace	(13)
		Priest Holmes is making Chiefs' training camp uncomfortable, complaining of lack of handicapped parking	(21)
		Joel Zumaya off the DL. Thankfully, Guitar Hero 3 comes out during the World Series, so Tigers fans have nothing to worry about	(10)
		The Ric Romero of sportswriters just now comes to the conclusion that maybe the Boston Red Sox are regretting that whole Eric Gagne deal	(529)
		Why the NHL should say, "Sorry, Kansas City, but expansion doesn't make any sense." Not that the NHL has been known for using common sense, of course	(36)
		NASCAR's "Iron Man", Ricky Rudd, announces his plans to re-retire	(22)
		Ronaldo Mexico strikes plea dealeo	(902)
		NY Liberty rally past Chicago Sky to edge Washington Mystics for final playoff spot. In other news, the WNBA played yet another season without anybody noticing	(25)
		Rob Styles gets a red card for his horrible officiating in the Liverpool v. Chelsea match. Sheffield United set to sue the FA to get Liverpool their 2 points back	(60)
		In rally-car terms, this is known as "taking the turn too fast"	(42)
		Washed-up, drug-addled cheater in a sport that nobody in the US watches says that he hates the US	(48)
(Some Yellow Car)		California Speedway introduces cheerleaders to NASCAR - because there are finer things you'd rather see on the pole than Tony Stewart	(21)
		Q: What happens during a 250cc motorcycle race when you hit another cycle at full speed? A: Flight	(23)
		NBA referees union says that Tim Donaghy's gambling activity is isolated and not a sign of a widespread problem with the referees. And they're willing to put some money on that	(13)
		Tiger Woods says he can't play because his body is spent from golfing. In other news, golf still not a sport	(103)
(NASCAR.com)		Millions of rednecks will mysteriously come down with the flu at noon on Monday, and maybe even Tuesday	(40)