Iraq wins Asian Cup, only four killed during celebrations. If you are American and you don't like soccer, you are ignorant and uncivilized	(20)
		Winner of Game one of last years World Series, kid who threw one hitter, gets first win of this season. Halfway through it	(9)
(Some Guy)		Hundreds of homeless from across the globe waved flags, blew whistles, and pushed shopping carts at the start of the Fourth Annual Homeless Football World Cup	(4)
		Video games televised as a sport? ... We're doomed, all right	(55)
		Alberto Contador wins Tour de France, does not surrender	(20)
		A-Rod's sphincter clamps shut after learning he'll be in Jose Canseco's next tell-all book. In other news: Derek Jeter has suffered a mysterious groin injury	(32)
		Caption Michael Vick's reaction when he heard that his posse was selling him out	(240)
		Miguel Cabrera, 24 years old, number 24, hits 24th home run at 24 WIllie Mays Plaza. Jim Carrey unavailable for comment	(17)
		Sad: Umpire attendant breaks streak of 3,769 consecutive home games. Sappy: To see Cal Ripken Jr. inducted into the Hall of Fame	(15)
		I give to you the most ingenious play in the history of Pee Wee Football	(157)
		Hatton and Mayweather finally shut up and agree to fight	(18)
		The long, long fall continues. Upper Deck pulls Michael Vick cards & autographed memorabilia	(34)

		Alberto Contador set to win Tour de France on Sunday. Everybody who cares expected to gather in phone booth near Arc de Triomphe	(33)
		36 year old soccer phenom Freddy Adu will be sold to Portuguese soccer team Benfica	(28)
		Michelle Wie finally breaks par for the first time in over a year, promptly follows it up with a 12 over par 84	(25)
(Velonews)		Levi Leipheimer crushes the field in Le Tour's final time trial. Question is, only 31 seconds back, will he go for it tomorrow?	(28)
		“'It’s by committee, and that’s OK,” coach Herm Edwards said. “We’ve got a whole team of running backs. I might be able to run the ball a little more, huh?” NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO	(18)
(Birmingham News)		Remember "Two-a-Days?" For the coach, that didn't mean two practices a day. That meant two families to support, one public and one secret. Now give me three laps	(11)
		Michael Vick's co-defendants sticking by him and refuse to testify. Just kidding, one of them is already singing like a canary to the feds	(49)
		The Big Unit to be sent in for service, out of order for the rest of the season	(12)
		Royals outfielder Emil Brown cheneys a reporter with a pellet from a small plastic gun in the clubhouse. Royals management calls it "an accident"	(13)
		Marc Bulger signs a six-year, $65 million contract extension to keep losing for the St. Louis Rams	(19)
(Some Guy)		Major sports record finally broken	(26)
		'Reformed' mobster and 'Goodfellas' subject matter Henry Hill sounds off on crooked NBA refs	(12)
		754*	(150)

		John Terry becomes highest-paid player in Premier League history with new contract worth approximately £225,000 per dive	(27)
		Greybar Hotel resident sues Michael Vick for $63B due to unauthorized microwave testing & stolen dogs	(12)
		In case any Detroit Lions fans were wondering, Mike McMahon sucks at Canadian football, too	(25)
		Kenny Lofton is coming home, welcome back old friend	(41)
		NFL stops selling all Michael Vick merchandise on the league's official website	(45)
		British cyclist expelled from Tour de France says race has "lost all credibility." And if there's anyone who knows about having no credibility, it's a British athlete in an international sporting event	(33)
		Like fresh bacon in a greasy frying pan on a sunny weekend morning in the summer, Schilling glistens in second rehab start	(45)
		US men's basketball team eliminated from Pan-Am medal contention after another loss, this time to hoops powerhouse Panama	(18)
		Oriole with streak longer than Ripken's will end it in honor of #8	(31)
		Matt Leinart lands role in Adam Sandler movie. Suggested titles include "Big Deadbeat Daddy"	(55)
		Steven Spielberg threatens to leave post as artistic director of Beijing Olympics unless China falls in line with UN sanctions against Sudan. In other news, Steven Spielberg is artistic director of the Beijing Olympics	(17)
		What does $250,000,000 buy you? If you are the Yankees, zero runs versus the Kansas City Royals	(92)
		52-year-old caucasian man gets hassled because his name is Barry Bonds. "It's embarrassing in that Roger Clinton-Billy Carter sort of way"	(7)
		NASCAR is doomed. DOOMED! This article proves it I swear to God it does	(45)
		Arod's 499th Maybe His 500th In The Magical Makebelieve World Of Baseball	(14)
(Some Guy)		The worst year in sports by city	(44)
(Some Guy)		Bucs cut All-Pro Simeon Rice hours after he reports to training camp in Orlando	(37)
(Some guy)		Youth baseball team wins 14-0, forfeits game when asshat complains arm patches are silkscreened on not sewn on	(31)

		Cleveland Browns' locker room flooded with water and raw sewage. Apparently the team isn't the only thing in that stadium that stinks	(12)
		The expected Phillies tank job will come sooner than expected as Chase Utley breaks his hand	(22)
(Some Guy)		Cubs outfielder Alfonso Soriano proves money doesn't buy good taste	(21)
		Rookie pitcher celebrates his major league debut by getting ejected	(21)
		Vick pleads not-guilty to dog fighting, guilty to sucking	(143)
		Barry Bonds fires back, calling Bob Costas a "midget man" and notes Curt Schilling's love of bacon	(86)
		Bennati wins 17th Tour de France stage, followed by a couple kids on tricycles and an old man on a Hoveround chair. Everyone else kicked out	(18)
		Wake Forest men's basketball coach Skip Prosser, 56, has died of a heart attack	(93)
(Some WHO-DEY Guy)		Bengal suspended for 2007 season. For what, I'm not sure	(30)
		Mike Piazza pressing assault and battery charges against fan who hit him in the head with a plastic water bottle. While he was wearing a helmet	(51)
(Some Guy)		Deion Sanders is an idiot	(215)
		Rory Sabbatini challenges Gary Player to either name names or STFU	(12)
(ESPN)		Tom Glavine throws some more pitches you think you could hit... Wins 299th	(31)
		Juan Pablo Montoya set to become first driver to complete Indy 500, F1 U.S. Grand Prix, and Brickyard 400 trifecta	(35)
		US team blows opening Pan-Am game to basketball powerhouse Uruguay. Oh, well... it's not like we invented the game or anything	(49)
		Jason Giambi "fired up" to begin rehab stint Friday, says he looks forward to swapping stories with Linsday Lohan	(35)
		A-Rod slaps his 499th. Oh, and he also homered	(20)
		"When Bonds was put together - by God, by Victor Conte, by someone - he wasn't built with 240 pounds of skull and muscle in mind."	(11)
(NYTimes)		A-Rod so highly praised by George Brett that umpires check his shaft for pine tar	(31)
		Attention all base coaches -- Coolbaugh hit in neck, not head. Modell's and other fine sporting goods stores accepting exchanges of helmets for protective neck gear	(20)

		On a hot and muggy day, here’s a bit of hockey to tide you over until the season starts (Not safe for work lyrics)	(29)
		The ten most expensive sports collectibles	(43)
(With Leather)		Michigan and Notre Dame decide to take a break and see other opponents after the 2011 season	(49)
(Sharks Territory)		San Jose Sharks unveil new kickass logos. We're gonna need a bigger rink	(53)
(Some Guy)		Stop us if this is getting old, but now the leader of the Tour de France has been kicked out of race for missing drug test	(69)
		Falcons are now without either of their top two running backs	(32)
		Mount St. Curt Schilling's big fat piehole just erupted again. Apology, denial, or "you guys misquoted me" expected to occur within the next 72 hours	(48)
		Boston Globe Simpsonizes the notable players and staff of the 2007 Boston Red Sox, here are the results. Pretty good overall, except Curt Schilling isn't properly shown as Comic Book Guy	(24)
		How much did Donaghy affect the NBA games he refereed? "There's a 99.9 percent chance that these results would not have happened." Literally	(168)
		Hall of Fame QB Warren Moon's hopes for a comeback with the Bengals dashed as his DUI gets reduced to "negligent driving"	(8)
(nfl.com)		Priest Holmes may report for training camp... in other news the Chiefs are also expecting an ambulance to report for training camp	(20)
		Boston media busily debunking baseless rumor of football star's death. A baseless rumor that was started by the Boston media	(21)
		"That's absurd, I can tell you that with his blood, I would have tested positive for vodka"	(16)
(Post-Gazette)		Man jailed for pretending to play for the Steelers. Which is funny, because last year Ben Roethlisberger wasn't arrested for doing the same thing	(137)
		MLS: "Beckham gave us our best television rating evar" Translation: One percent of homes with ESPN had their TV tuned in	(70)
		Basque separatist group ETA sets off two roadside bombs during Spanish stage of Tour de France. But at this point, surprise IEDs are maybe the only way to get people to care about the World Two-Wheeled Doping Championship	(134)
(Some (P)irate fan)		The Pirates have lost nine of their 10 games since the All-Star break, will soon be sent to AAA for a team to be named later	(52)
		Following the death of minor league first base coach, Colorado Rockies coach Glenallen Hill isn't taking any chances	(27)
		Catfight on the course! Michelle Wie paired up with one of her biggest critics for upcoming tournament	(14)
		Which member of the Red Sox drives a Hummer with Louis Vuitton leather seats, gull-wing doors and satellite dish on the roof? Why, the team barber, of course	(32)
		Big Unit may not be able to get it up again this year, or maybe ever	(9)
		New Jersey Devils sign Moran. Get a brain	(25)
(Hardball Times)		Red Sox charge by far the most in ticket "convenience" fees and other add-ons - Brewers still a damn good deal	(90)
		Chemist who invented "the clear" calls out Barry Bonds and Gary Sheffield as steroids users	(21)
		First Biggio, now Martin: Curtis Martin, a class act, to retire from the NY Jets as the 4th leading rusher of all-time	(52)
		Barry Bonds autobiographer Jeff Pearlman talks openly and very candidly about what he really thinks of Bonds' pursuit of history	(20)
(TMZ)		Matt Leinart's "fiancee" is asking for $30,000/month in child support for herself and their little snowflake	(89)
		Colorado Rockies first baseman Todd Helton committed two errors in one game last week. No, wait... he didn't	(5)
		Magic Johnson wins civil rights award, then has sex with it	(109)

(mlb.com)		Today is the 24th anniversary of George Brett's pine tar home run and subsequent flipout. Hear the radio call from Rizzuto, White, and Messer. Bonus: 192 holy cows	(24)
		NASCAR driver shuffle continues as DEI swallows up Ginn Racing. Earnhardt, Truex, Menard, and Martin joined by Nemecheck and Sterling Marlin for remainder of season. Duke sucks	(24)
		Notre Dame football head coach (and former New England Patriot assistant coach) Charlie Weis loses medical malpractice lawsuit. Peter King angrily vows to appeal, and take the case all the way to the Supreme Court if he has to	(25)
		Class act and Houston fan favorite Craig Biggio retiring after this season. Says that when he misses the MLB, he'll just go to the local batting cages and get hit by 20-30 pitches	(46)
		Iraqi soccer fans prepare for their national soccer team's Asian Cup semi-final game by... stocking up on gas and ammunition?	(4)
		Tim Donaghy was the only NBA ref involved in the betting scandal. In other news, every time Manu Ginobli falls down, he was actually fouled	(70)
		While practicing javelin for the Junior Olympics, boy inadvertently makes himself eligible for the Special Olympics	(56)
		The USGA cannot confirm that professional golfers are taking performance enhancing drugs other than alcohol, nicotine and Levitra	(8)
(Some Guy)		National Hockey League will show all its games live online for the eight people in the U.S. who care enough to buy a subscription	(48)
		After David Stern and his crack security team failed to catch a point-shaving referee in two years, there's no reason to trust the NBA ever again	(66)
		Court rules Adidas soccer shoes made from kangaroo skin cannot be sold in California due to 1971 ban on importing kangaroo products. Fair dinkum	(23)
(Some Manager)		At age 60, Nolan Ryan still throws baseball 85 MPH and brushes back batters	(50)
(Velo News)		Positive test for illegal blood transfusion of multi-stage winner, Kazakh Vinokourov, prompts team to withdraw from Tour de France	(82)
(Mental Floss)		Five ballpark promotions that went wrong. Yes Comisky, we ARE going to dredge up Disco Demolition Night	(43)
		Ray Emery signs a three-year $9.5 million contract, thus ensuring that for the next three years, the Ottawa Senators won't win the Stanley Cup	(45)
		Packers fans lock kid in room and head to casino to watch game, not realizing that Mark Chmura would've gladly babysat for them	(11)
(Some Guy)		A look at college football's biggest loser. Duke has lost 20 games in a row and 72 of its past 81 games. Duke sucks	(45)
		Man. United defender Gabriel Heinze is wrangling for a transfer to Liverpool. Translation for Americans: Take "Johnny Damon signs with the Yankees" and multiply it by a gazillion on the WTF? scales	(51)
(Some Guy)		Red Sox pitcher Jon Lester beats cancer, Indians. Suck it, lymphoma	(52)
		Bonds' mistress to tell all in magazine interview. Naked	(21)
		Problem: You join a new NFL team, only to discover that your teammate already wears your lucky jersey number. Solution: Donate the down payment for a house to a mother and her autistic son in return for the number. Everybody wins	(30)
		Falcons player arrested. No, not THAT player	(19)

		Oldest former MLB player dies at age 100. Career accomplishments include pitching to Babe Ruth and Julio Franco	(28)
(wtkr.com)		Complete the following statement: Allen Iverson giving advice to Michael Vick is like _______	(60)
		Bud Selig will apparently show up to whatever Giants games he feels like	(16)
		Roger Clemens will make more TONIGHT in his start against KC than 60 percent of the Royals will make all year	(139)
		Michael Vick will continue to play. The NFL is not going to the dogs	(64)
		Peter King: The Lions. If they're not a top-five offense this year, I'll be stunned. In other news, Peter King to be stunned in '08 season	(90)
(Some Guy)		We know Budweiser will not sponsor Dale Jr. in 2008. Dew we know who will? Dew we care?	(18)
		Team USA defeats Team USA 105-104, as the NBA stars prepare to embarass themselves on the world stage yet again	(32)
(Some ManU)		Professional soccer contributes to the wussification of American males, and has a secret communist agenda	(47)
(NY Daily News)		Yankees radio guy John Sterling hasn't come up with an inane gimmick home-run call for rookie slugger Shelley Duncan... yet	(55)
(Sporting News)		After news that NBA ref Tim Donaghy may name other refs and players in gambling probe, police are called to his house for protection after he recieves numerous death threats	(86)
		Reporter forces Kobe Bryant to admit at press conference that he's a "baby" and that he'll be back with the Lakers next season	(8)
		The NFL off-season is probably the second-biggest sport in the U.S., second only to the NFL onseason	(18)
		Minor league coach dies after being struck by line drive during game	(33)
		Emmitt Smith on the Vick situation: "Now, granted he might have been to a dogfight a time or two, maybe five times, maybe 20 times... but he's not the one you're after"	(49)
		Okay, maybe the Yankees aren't that bad after all	(108)
		Brazilian soccer fans not satisfied with jeering loser club off field, drive out to club owner's house to throw eggs and firecrackers while chanting insulting slogans	(6)
(Fox Sports)		Ten NFL players who will have breakout seasons	(34)
		Kansas City Royals emerge from cellar, blinking at the large glowing object in the sky whose name they can't quite recall	(14)
		Dick Pound says he agrees with Gary Player's assertion that golfers are juicing. Most people just start laughing at the mention of the name "Dick Pound" and stop listening	(17)