Drew Curtis' FARK.com -- Sports Archives for '2007-04-29 23:59:59'

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Sun April 29, 2007

	Troy Smith, former Tosu quarterback, finally drafted in last pick of fifth round. Pretty good for a Heisman winner	(18)
	The Next Bull Run is on, defending champion Miami Heat swept	(14)
	NFL Draft day drop costs Brady Quinn $17,000,000; On the bright side, at least he gets to live in Cleveland	(21)
	First look at Madden 2008. Submitter eager to start the Brady Quinn Super Bowl era	(53)
	Top 10 players who have been largely invisible during their NHL careers -- except for one shining moment in the playoffs that made them immortal	(22)
(NBC)	April 29th NHL Playoff Thread - Go Go Power Rangers	(213)
(AOL Sports Blog)	Raiders trade Randy Moss to the Patriots. What could possibly go wrong?	(118)
(mlb.com)	St. Louis Cardinals pitcher Josh Hancock killed in auto accident	(180)
(Some Guy)	“On draft day, the NFL looks at a young man’s talent. Then they look at his rap sheet.”	(7)
(KTAR Radio)	Former CFL quarterback changes sport, hits home run with 17-year old student. Bonus: he's a substitute teacher. Bogus: photo of the teacherback	(17)
	Funny car legend John Force faces his toughest opponent ever in Atlanta Sunday: his 24-year old daughter Ashley. "If anyone is going to be nervous, it's him. He'll be so worried about me."	(11)
	To: St. Louis Cards From: Seattle Mariners Re: Jeff Weaver Message: Do Not Want	(34)
	Kyle Busch doesn't need Dale Jr. to relief drive this time. With bonus multiple barrel rolls and flaming wreckage	(28)
	New York legislators, presumably in a state of embarassment, want the Giants and Jets to stop using "New York" in their names	(24)
	Cricket World Cup Final comes to a farcical end, quite in fitting with the entire event. And Australia won, cue crowing convicts	(8)

Sat April 28, 2007

	♫Meet the Mets, meet the Mets, / Step right up and greet the Mets / Bring your kiddies, buy some roids ... ♫	(12)
	NFL Draft Discussion Thread, Part 2	(632)
	The Pittsburgh Steelers have a new mascot, yinzers he needs a name	(47)
	Joe Torre's job reportedly in jeopardy, could be fired if the Red Sox sweep the Yankees again this weekend. Because Steinbrenner's strategy of abruptly firing managers worked so well before	(63)
(NBCSports)	NHL Playoff thread - Saturday, April 28th, 2007 - No more Magoo	(322)
	NFL draft discussion thread (closed - see new thread)	(1292)
	Coolest stunt flying you'll see all day (with bonus hot woman pilot)	(18)
	Oklahoma-based group who recently bought arena-impaired NBA Seattle Sonics wants to move team to Las Vegas instead of Oklahoma City	(19)
	Paul Allen interested in buying out Southampton football club	(6)
	NFL Draft coverage will feature Will Ferrell comedy skit as he plays USC "auxiliary strength coach" preparing USC lineman for draft (with video)	(9)
(kget.com)	City denies damage claim of centerfielder popped in the face by a fly ball when someone turned of the field lights	(4)
	#1 seeded, 67-win Dallas Mavericks serenaded with chants of "o-ver-ra-ted" after getting blown out in Game 3 by the Golden State Warriors	(42)
	Buffalo Sabres top the NY Rangers 3-2 despite not playing for 2 periods, to take a 2-0 series lead	(22)

Fri April 27, 2007

	Chiefs best defensive player suspended for first 4 games of season; vows to bring championship to KC as soon as possible	(7)
	Barry Bonds alleged steroid supplier Victor Conte caught using images of Bonds and Bonds' jailed trainer Greg Anderson to sell current supplements (with pic)	(10)
	KU's Brandon Rush declares eligibility for the NBA draft. Family makes plans to watch him play in Lithuania next year	(14)
	Go Raptors/Bulls/Mavs: NBA playoff thread	(69)
	Six Penn St. players charged in violent off-campus fight. WE ARE... headed to prison	(31)
	WNBA player arrested for assault after getting into fight with opponent after game. Submitter would seek out pictures of the players but doesn't want the mental image he has of this ruined	(5)
	Stewart says NASCAR still not fixed, proposes more left turns	(21)
	Marcus Camby wins NBA Defensive Player Of The Year, taught Carmelo the "backpedal from fight" maneuver	(7)
	NFL commissioner wants to make it even harder for the average fan to go to the Super Bowl	(32)
	Hot Venezuelan Milka Duno passes her IRL rookie test (with pic)	(197)
	Croatian footballer given 16 sheep for the 16 goals he has scored this season. No word on whether he's going to open a brothel	(26)
(Arsenal FC)	U.S. money, resignations, secret talks with Russians -- The new Cold War continues (ironically) at Arsenal FC	(3)
	After retiring from baseball 41 years ago, MLB Hall Of Famer Sandy Koufax drafted... by the Israeli Baseball League	(19)
(mlb.com)	Ben Sheets probable for next start. Mark Prior and Kerry Wood consulting their dictionaries to find out what that "p word" means	(15)
(NASCAR.COM)	If you are reading this, you are ahead of Michael Waltrip in the Nextel Cup standings	(16)
	Rookie phenom pitcher arrives to save the Yankees' season. Just kidding -- he sucks	(49)
	April 27th NHL playoff thread. The Sens is mightier	(129)
(Some Guy)	It's okay to be a Sabres fan once again	(18)
	Article appropriately compares Jets' draft plans to watching a Shyamalasshat movie: Full of anticipation and hope that they won't do something stupid, then the disappointing realization at the end that you've wasted your time	(10)
	AC Milan's goalkeeper Dida sets Ebay record for sale of a washed-up goalie	(7)
(38pitches.com)	Curt Schilling challenges any takers one million dollars to prove that the blood on his sock was fake. One thing is for sure, the blood on Gary Thorne's butt hole from the new ass Curt just ripped him is real	(164)
	The NFL draft is almost here, submit your predictions so you can have bragging rights later	(83)
(Some Guy)	Another reason to not be a Buffalo Sabres fan	(19)
(mlb.com)	Giants win their eighth straight game after sweeping mid-week series, take sole possesion of first place. That "Beat L.A." thing is working just fine, thank you very much	(32)
(Some Jock)	Male athletes prefer female physicians. That last word could be just about anything	(11)
	Page 2 gives the reasons why athletes wear the numbers that they do. Duke sucks	(27)

Thu April 26, 2007

	NFL may implement mandatory brain tests for players. Eli Manning seen looking very nervous at Giants headquarters	(16)
	The Braves and 634-year-old John Smoltz agree to a contract extention to keep him around until he is 637	(19)
	Indians outfielder Shin-Soo Choo booed in Toledo because his name vaguely resembles VT shooter's name. "Ohio" tag gone to concession stand for more beer	(28)
	Can you pronounce these names currently skating in the NHL?	(44)
	Sammy Sosa has now uncorked his bat at a record 44 different parks	(5)
	Michael Vick accused of running a dogfighting and cockfighting ring out of an abandoned house in Virginia. Right now, that whole water bottle incident looks pretty good	(23)
(ksn)	Sisters fire simultaneous no-hitters	(9)
	Continuing on his quest to coach every NBA team, Larry Brown is interviewing with the Memphis Grizzlies. In other news, Memphis apparently has enough people interested in NBA basketball to host a team called the Grizzlies	(13)
	April 26th NHL playoff thread	(367)
	Los Angeles Times sportswriter announces he is transsexual and will change his name to Christine. Seriously	(169)
	MLB credits Hank Aaron with 50 lost home runs	(18)
	Orioles broadcaster claims blood on Schilling's sock was actualy paint. Looks like we just found Rosie O'Donnell her next gig	(88)
(tmj)	Confused about which team he's playing for, Ben Sheets injures groin in game against the Cubs	(8)
	Arsene Wenger says Sir Alex is his pick for EPL Manager of the Year. In other news, it'll be a brisk 12° this morning in Greater Hades	(17)
(TC Palm)	Something even Red Sox fans can get behind - hit 74 home runs, Alex Rodriguez, for the good of the game	(57)
	San Diego's Jake Peavy falls one strike short of Tom Seaver's major-league record for consecutive strikeouts, set 37 years ago against the Padres	(9)
(Fox sports)	NHL rat man retires. If only they could get rid of the octopus. (Hero tag for his work with autism and his family)	(9)
(Some Guy)	The Philadelphia Eagles new throwback uniforms look umm... What's the word? Oh yeah. Ridiculous	(47)
(Some Philanthropist)	We take a break from your regularly scheduled athlete arrest blotter to talk about some of the good guys	(6)
	741*	(42)

Wed April 25, 2007

	NASCAR driver likens the activity to "pro wrestling," complaining that too many caution flags are making it like WWE, which is "for the most part staged," showing again what his profession is	(16)
	Man with no legs runs fast enough to make South Africa's Olympic track team, but can't get leg up on support from International Olympic Committee	(14)
	Mark Prior has surgery, will miss 2007 season. Cubs fans shocked at the stunning revelation that Mr. Durability won't be available this year	(25)
	ESPN ranks deceased running back as the 145th best running back in the NFL draft, 9th best running back in the CFL draft	(17)
	Hey, Mr. James Filiaggi, any last words before the state of Ohio puts you to death for killing your wife? "When the Browns are in the Super Bowl in the next five years, you'll know I'm up there doing my magic."	(57)
	Mayor Bloomberg too busy rooting on A-Rod to make a hockey wager with the Mayor of Buffalo	(7)
	Playoff trifecta acheived 4/24 NBA playoff thread. LGT Scoreboard	(100)
	Rick Carlisle steps down as coach of the Washington Genera...er, Indiana Pacers	(5)
	Who says you can't get sponsorships being the worst NBA player in history ?	(9)
	BC Women's Hockey coach got his team to the Frozen Four last year. He resigned today after sending lewd text messages to one of his freshman players. His wife just gave birth last year. Hat Trick	(30)
(Some Guy)	The Phoenix Suns break the Game 2 Curse™ by beating the Kobes 126-98	(25)
	Joe Gibbs says there is no prospect in this year's draft that could make an impact on the Redskins. They can get to 5-11 with their current roster of overpaid, overhyped free agents all by themselves	(16)
(WSB TV)	Atlanta Falcons QB Michael Vick misses meeting with Congress after missing connecting flight to D.C. Water bottle with secret compartment wanted for questioning	(8)
	Allen Iverson is the Denver Nuggets hand, and their hand is on the trigger	(18)
	"Johnson, Wells matchup showcases pitchers who once wore onions on belt, because that was the style"	(12)
	Now A-Rod doesn't want to leave NY. Make up your mind already	(32)
	Yankees boldly go where they haven't gone in many moons -- last place. EVERYBODY PANIC* (*unless you root for any of the other 29 teams)	(52)
	Keyshawn Johnson takes over Michael Irvin's former role of "annoying black guy" for this year's NFL draft on ESPN	(21)
(story.scout)	Ken Griffey Jr. overcomes colon issue, takes a fat shiat on the Cardinals and Reggie Jackson's HR record	(20)
	Official NHL Playoff Discussion thread for Wednesday, 4/25. LGT best team in the East	(191)
	Official 4/25 Champions League Thread: Chelsea host Liverpool in opening leg of semifinals	(86)
	Q: What can $200M buy you? A: Last place in the AL East	(72)
	England soccer captain Alan Ball dead at 61	(20)
	CBS rejects TV commercial featuring noted drunken golfer John Daly swinging a beer	(6)
(Eurosport.com)	Chelsea boss Jose Mourinho alleged to have sneaked into dressing room in a laundry basket to avoid a touchline ban. Submitter surprised to know they made laundry baskets large enough to accomodate Mourinho and his ego	(13)

Tue April 24, 2007

(Buffalo News)	It's not a good sign for your team when your own mayor refuses to take the traditional "friendly wager" with the opposing city's mayor	(45)
	Mike Celizic says the NHL needs the New York Rangers to make the Stanley Cup Finals. In other news, Mike Celizic is farking batshiat insane	(65)
	Don't get all caught up in Barry Bonds' home run chase; the Phillies are 33 games away from being the first professional sports franchise to hit the 10,000 loss mark	(28)
	Lou Pinella has finally figured out that the Cubs will always be the Cubs	(22)
(MLB)	MLB news reports that Miguel Tejada has played in his 1100th consecutive game. This breaking news story will be brought to you constantly until 2016, when he will be able to surpass Lou Gehrig and Cal Ripken, Jr	(18)
	Ken Griffey Jr.'s injury for April 2007 is...spins wheel...an inflamed pooper	(80)
	Boomer Esiason lands five-day tryout next week in Imus morning radio spot; will try to convince CBS suits he deserves the gig permanently	(14)
	Boston Celtics break off troubled but talented Guard Sebastian Telfair. Ease up, Bas. Check yourself, bro. This thread is epic...classic. Late	(25)
	TMQ sends up a mock NFL draft; even more ludicrous is that Scarlett Johansson gets drafted 20th by the Giants	(19)
	Caron Butler has cast removed from hand, told to avoid any contact for a week or ten days, which, given first round scheduling in the NBA, means he may miss 1, possibly 2, games	(10)
	New York Mets outfielder's Myspace page expresses his male stripper-like sense of style, enthusiasm for webcam girls	(43)
(Some Guy)	Top 10 most vain Premiership soccer stars -- the hardest part was narrowing it down to just ten	(11)
	MLB cracks down on champagne. Still no cure for steroids	(12)
(WFAN)	"Most anticipated New York arrival since The Beatles": Phil Hughes will make his major-league debut Thursday	(28)
	Official 4/24 Champions League thread: Manchester United hosts AC Milan in first leg of semifinals	(155)
	Official 4/24 NHL playoff thread: Show us your Round Two prediction for bragging right goodness	(205)
	Sports columnists finally says what submitter has been thinking. "If Russell is the second coming of Culpepper does that make him a No. 1 pick? It doesn’t even make him a top 15 or 20 pick"	(35)
	Colorado State discovers why it's a bad idea to invite four-year-olds to play on the sidelines of football scrimmages	(69)
	Yankees panic, call up Phil Hughes	(61)
	In news sure to send Red Sox Nation into a tizzy, Alex Rodriguez was spotted eating dinner with Joe Buck and Tim McCarver	(52)
(Some Guy)	Official Cricket World Cup discussion thread. Special semi-final edition, aka "Anybody but the Aussies..."	(24)
	The hits just keep on coming - after a weekend of hanging 5 or more runs on Boston's top three pitchers and managing to lose every game, Alex Rodriguez hits home runs number 13 and 14 and the Yankees still lose, this time to the Devil Rays	(149)
	Dallas Stars 3-for-3 in first round playoff chokes	(44)
	David Beckham may have offended all three LA Galaxy fans by wearing a Cincinnati Reds cap	(19)

Mon April 23, 2007

	The story behind the only other pitcher in baseball history to give up back-to-back-to-back-to-back HRs	(44)
	Mark Prior to have "exploratory surgery," reportedly in search of his career	(16)
	Drunken birthday party pics reveal Tony Romo still hanging onto smokin' hot country singer Carrie Underwood	(17)
	NYC bans aluminum bats, says wooden ones are just as good for threatening other motorists	(59)
	U.S. Figure Skating Association realizes that no one will pay them for the rights to broadcast the U.S. Figure Skating Championships, so they give the rights to NBC for the next three years... for free	(45)
(Some Guy)	The Devil Rays put everyone but the pitcher, catcher and 1B into the outfield to defend against Travis Hafner -- and it works (pic)	(28)
	Break out the asterisk. Cyclist Floyd Landis pulls a Barry Bonds	(20)
	Barbosa wins NBA's Sixth Man award by a landslide. Captain Sparrow nowhere on the list	(8)
(NBC Sports)	Cro Cop gets destroyed by Gonzaga at UFC 70. With painful pics (check out his leg)	(37)
	Video of the Red Sox' back-to-back-to-back-to-back homeruns last night	(39)
(Helsinki News)	NHL star in hot water after speedboat he lent to friend strikes rock and sinks off Helsinki	(8)
(Some Nobody)	Since nobody cares about the Canucks or Stars, submitter goes for a cheap green. Here is today's NHL playoff thread	(183)
	Black sportswriter Jason Whitlock turns down offer to take over Don Imus' morning show slot on radio and TV	(15)
	American sports team owner, fueled by Wal-Mart money, plots billion-dollar takeover of last of England's UK-owned soccer powerhouses: Arsenal	(8)
	It took him 22 hours to do it, but Indiana Jones (complete with big-ass boulder) completes the London Marathon	(7)
(wbbm-am)	Cubs broadcaster Ron Santo has been hospitalized	(26)
(Probably another overtime game)	Official 4/23 "Turco choking in the NHL playoffs" thread: Last day of Round 1	(210)
	San Antonio Spurs, the team who worries so much about their hair and makeup, forgot about the Denver Nuggets	(37)
	Baseball's most unhittable. This list clearly does not include Anna Benson, given her reputation	(30)
(The Local)	Swedish woman goes to Bulgaria to compete in a wrestling match, wins beauty contest instead	(48)
	Thinking that Bear Bryant was rising from the dead, 92,000 Alabama football fans show up for a scrimmage	(17)
	Buccanneers force cheerleaders to get "sassier, sexier" haircuts, but there's no scissors that can fix fugly. (Link goes to before/after slideshow)	(20)
(AOL Sports Blog)	Brian Urlacher has donated the hat that got him fined by the NFL. roceeds from Ebay auction will go to pregnant wife of a soldier in Afghanistan	(25)
	Everything that is incredible about sports summed up in one montage	(96)
	Remember that reception at Buckingham Palace for Arsenal back in February? Turns out that Queen Elizabeth II is a Gooner, just like her dear ol' mum. As for Prince Charles, he just sticks with the horses	(9)
	Philadelphia Phillies win two games in a row. "That's what we call a winning streak"	(15)
	Dallas Mavericks, the team who worries so much about the Spurs, forgot about the Golden State Warriors	(45)
	Red Wings win in double overtime of Game 6 to send Flames to the first tee	(82)
	Atlanta Braves take their second series of the year from that other team in New York	(26)
(Some bowler)	Indian coach of Pakistani team murdered in Jamaican hotel room might have been slipped snake venom so he could be easily strangled. And you thought cricket was boring	(38)
	Coach Jim Playfair of the Calgary Flamers fined $25,000 for unfair play. Sometimes the headlines just write themselves	(34)