If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
Fark SearchWeb Fark
These links may be stale and generate errors. Can't do much about it. Tastes like chicken.

(Headline T-Shirts are still available for archive links.)
Sun October 25, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(LA Times) Asinine Paramount says they may do a sequel to Paranormal Activity "if that makes some sense." Well, it doesn't make any damn sense, but given Hollywood's tendency to rape its corpses, it'll happen  (latimesblogs.latimes.com) (73)
(Breitbart.com) Spiffy Leo DiCaprio has a $3,200 toilet. Tobey Maguire forbids leather in his house. Adrian Grenier insulates his apartment with old pants. Jennifer Aniston takes 3-minute showers. What are YOU doing to save the planet, heathens?  (bighollywood.breitbart.com) (174)
(Starpulse) Sad Tyler Perry gets all emotional on tonight's "Tyler Perry's 60 Minutes (featuring Tyler Perry)" episode. Tyler Perry  (starpulse.com) (35)
(People Magazine) Cool HI, BILLY MAYS' SON HERE TO APPROVE THE IDEA OF BILLY MAYS COSTUMES FOR HALLOWEEN  (people.com) (40)
(Variety) Obvious Apparently, people would rather watch a "horror" movie about a couple who spends 99% of their time in bed while being terrorized by a demon than yet another entry into the torture porn genre that is Saw  (variety.com) (101)
(Examiner) Cool NBC gives "Community" and "Parks and Recreation" the go-ahead to finish their seasons, buying themselves more time to dig up something less funny to put on the air  (examiner.com) (95)
(Contact Music) Interesting According to Michael Jackson's father, producers of "This is It" used body doubles in certain scenes instead of footage of Michael. The craziness continues  (contactmusic.com) (29)
(Internet News) Stupid NBC: Don't Pirate Our Content. It's Not Fair  (internetnews.com) (98)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Sad Series premiere of "The Jeff Dunham Show" becomes the most-watched debut in Comedy Central's history, sadly proves that Jeff Dunham's dummies aren't alone  (hollywoodreporter.com) (130)
(Washington Post) Asinine Hollywood's latest excuse for movies not making money: Women don't like strong female leads  (washingtonpost.com) (107)
(CBS Baltimore) Hero The show "Wired" is actually being used to teach some of the city's most troubled teenagers to turn their own lives around in Hamsterdam. McNulty and crew are speechless  (wjz.com) (58)
(About.com) Silly Top 50 cartoon characters Bugs is number one and Mickey is number 3, who is number 2, I said number 2 (pics)  (animatedtv.about.com) (274)

Sat October 24, 2009
(Starpulse) Obvious Deal of the farking century  (starpulse.com) (135)
(Starpulse) Scary Justin Timberlake gets restraining order against "obsessed mentally unstable celebrity stalker," or as we would call such a person, an N'Sync fan  (starpulse.com) (12)
(Some Chuckhead) Spiffy 11 Ingenious Signs On The Simpsons. #1 is the dirtiest sign ever to make it to TV  (11points.com) (140)
(Contact Music) Cool Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to read about Peter Graves' Hollywood Walk of Fame star. Should you or anyone else discuss this, this thread will avow knowledge of your actions. This headline will self-destruct in 5 seconds  (contactmusic.com) (20)
(Starpulse) Fail Hayden Christensen sues his producer for convincing him to sign up for a starring role in a "bogus" film. A little late to realize the Star Wars prequels were a bad idea, isn't it?  (starpulse.com) (33)
(Some Guy) Silly Harlan Ellison finally settles the Lawsuit on the Edge of Forever  (tvsquad.com) (67)
(Some Guy) Sad Original "Cartoon Network" promo reel from 1991. Any resemblance to the current "Cartoon Network" is strictly coincidental  (cartoonbrew.com) (117)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Obvious All we want is life beyond the Thunderdome. "Mad Max 4" to start shooting in 2010  (hollywoodreporter.com) (90)
(hitfix) Interesting James Bond must have had a few too many vodka martinis, because he let a massive piece of intel slip  (hitfix.com) (51)
(Contact Music) Interesting Patrick Swayze's widow will break her silence, refuse to apologize for "Road House"  (contactmusic.com) (75)
(Telegraph) Scary Dame Judi Dench: "Far more fitting for the next stage [in my career] to play a slut"  (telegraph.co.uk) (41)
(Telegraph) Stupid Keira Knightley beats Scarlett Johansson by a femur to be "My Fair Skeletor"  (telegraph.co.uk) (110)
(Yahoo) Stupid Rihanna's hair is a bird, your argument is invalid  (omg.yahoo.com) (26)
(Daily Mail) Dumbass If boobies were brains, Pamela Anderson wouldn't have tiled her pool in platinum  (dailymail.co.uk) (60)

Fri October 23, 2009
(Pajiba) Cool In "Saw VI," we find out Jigsaw is a liberal. What a twist  (pajiba.com) (60)
(IMDB) Cool Today is Deapool's/Green Lantern's B-Day, everyone  (imdb.com) (33)
(New York Daily News) Obvious You mean doing a few key bumps to get high on coke, meth and ecstasy before giving sobriety speeches to students is wrong? How rude  (nydailynews.com) (25)
(Vanity Fair) Interesting Take heed, "Mad Men" fans, it's gonna happen to you, and soon: "How much more can I take, before I have to admit that I'm pretty much watching Falcon Crest in a cooler wrapping?"  (vanityfair.com) (78)
(New York Daily News) Spiffy Madonna to build an all-girls school in Malawi from which she can harvest the cutest and brightest orphans for her very own  (nydailynews.com) (22)
(Paste Magazine) Stupid Band you've never heard of biatches about recording a soundtrack for a film adaptation of a DC comic book character maybe ten of you have heard of  (pastemagazine.com) (81)
(Starpulse) PSA In Spain you cannot see Saw  (starpulse.com) (94)
(Gawker) Obvious A Director's "process" is just an excuse to bang PA's  (gawker.com) (47)
(Contact Music) Stupid 50 Cent thought he had a shot at playing Mr. T's role in the A-Team movie. I pity the fool  (contactmusic.com) (58)
(Contact Music) Obvious Now that she's divorcing Sean Penn, Robin Wright Penn is ready for a career boost. As you wish  (contactmusic.com) (49)
(Variety) Spiffy Adam Carolla gets a sitcom. He'll play a contractor whose wife left him because his droning voice drove her insane  (variety.com) (68)
(The Montreal Gazette) Amusing Actual headline about the Amelia Earhart biopic: "Amelia comes in for rough landing." Too soon?  (montrealgazette.com) (48)
(Fox News) Hero Jodie Sweetin's memoir details how to do copious amounts of drugs and not end up looking like Lindsay Lohan (w/pic of copious cleavage)  (entertainment.blogs.foxnews.com) (215)
(Free Press) Sad Soup's done  (freep.com) (184)
(Contact Music) Obvious Ashlee Simpson dropped from "Melrose Place," blames the whole thing on her band  T-Shirt  (contactmusic.com) (48)
(Some Son of Anarchy) Fail Not news: Jay Leno's show is beaten in the ratings by scripted TV. News: Jay Leno's show is beaten in the ratings by scripted TV on a cable channel  (movieline.com) (108)
(Entertainment Weekly) Spiffy Maybe the A-Team movie won't suck  (hollywoodinsider.ew.com) (87)

Thu October 22, 2009
(Some Guy) Cool George Lucas rumored to be considering another Star Wars trilogy. Before you bust out the pitchforks, the rumor is also that he would only produce, while Spielberg and/or Coppola would direct  (joblo.com) (196)
(Some Guy) Amusing For your education, here is a picture showing what 5 years of drug use can do to you, courtesy of Lindsay Lohan. Subby is now completely straight edge  (celebrityclubber.com) (77)
(Contact Music) Amusing The following conversation between then-President Bush and Carlos Bernard took place between 8:00 PM and 8:01 PM: "All I can do is watch that show of yours. Are you coming back?" "You don't have anything better to do?"  (contactmusic.com) (30)
(CSMonitor) Weird American scripted TV dramas like "24" and "Bones" becoming big in Japan, just as Americans begin to stop watching them  (features.csmonitor.com) (56)
(Some Squealing Teen) Amusing What the world needs is wax figures of The Jonas Brothers  (thevacationgals.com) (27)
(Starpulse) Obvious John Mayer defends, like, pot smoking, man  (starpulse.com) (63)
(Discovery) Spiffy Hello Kitty is now "Hello Cougar"  (blogs.discovery.com) (62)
(Nerve) Fail Ten sexiest tomboys of all time. Subby has to settle for the fail tag, since we don't have an uber-fail tag  (entertainment.nerve.com) (237)
(YouTube) Obvious Apparently, he's been around for thousands of years and still hasn't bothered to learn how to act  (youtube.com) (31)
(Examiner) Fail "The Jeff Dunham Show": About as funny as you'd expect a show that features a puppet shrieking about "a black man in the White House" to be  (examiner.com) (181)
(Contact Music) Sad Peter Criss was so embarrassed about his breast cancer diagnosis he hid it from everyone but his wife. Yeah, because I'm sure your bandmates or fans wouldn't have supported you. Come on, man, you're The Cat  (contactmusic.com) (93)
(Some Guy) Spiffy On the heels of nerd icon Wil Wheaton, Katee Sackhoff may make a cameo on "The Big Bang Theory"  (featuresblogs.chicagotribune.com) (147)
(Contact Music) Interesting Due to unpaid taxes, Nicolas Cage has been forced to sell his LA bird house  (contactmusic.com) (63)
(People Magazine) Interesting Good news, ladies. Rosie O'Donnell may be back on the market  (people.com) (66)

Wed October 21, 2009
(Contact Music) Interesting Whitney Houston is selling the home she shared with Bobby Brown, says that whomever buys it will inheret a lot of memories, hidden stashes of crack  (contactmusic.com) (18)
(Entertainment Weekly) Cool ABC gives Nathan Fillion what Fox never could: a full-season pickup. Then again, given that Castle is written by competent screenwriters and not Joss Whedon, it's a no-brainer  (ausiellofiles.ew.com) (243)
(National Geographic) Amusing Its not news, Its a Camel Beauty Pageant  (ngm.nationalgeographic.com) (23)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Strange Cue up "Sweet Georgia Brown": Harlem Globetrotters to return to animated TV show after 30-year absence from Saturday morning cartoons  (hollywoodreporter.com) (38)
(FilmDrunk) Asinine John Travolta and Robin Williams have done some unspeakable things for money  (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) (94)
(Breitbart.com) Interesting Japanese town threatens to sue filmmakers whose documentary doesn't paint the town's annual slaughter of 2,300 dolphins to be a wholesome family fun time  (breitbart.com) (94)
(Some Guy) Unlikely Marvel president calls "Batman & Robin" the most important comic-book movie of all time  (geeksofdoom.com) (128)
(Dlisted) Amusing "American Psycho" director reveals Christian Bale's inspiration for Patrick Bateman  (dlisted.com) (97)
(Now Magazine) Interesting Britney Spears settles lawsuit with photographer and offers an olive branch. Granted, the olive branch was coated with Cheetos dust, but it's the thought that counts  (nowmagazine.co.uk) (17)
(Yahoo) Spiffy "Astro Boy" and other iconic Osamu Tezuka manga to become weekly 100-page downloads on American iPhones  (sg.news.yahoo.com) (47)
(CBC) Weird So-called artist manages to piss-off a full spectrum of Canadians with a diorama depicting Anne of Green Gables with severed breasts and Bob and Doug McKenzie looking on (w/ pic)  (cbc.ca) (68)
(Contact Music) Obvious Hulk Hogan floored by divorce, steel chair  T-Shirt  (contactmusic.com) (214)
(Contact Music) Cool Guy Ritchie turns out to be a direct descendant of Britain's King Edward I, declares Madonna to be a royal pain in the ass  (contactmusic.com) (32)
(Boston Globe) Stupid The grand prize winner of last year's show Big Brother arrested for oxycodone distribution, presumably to the show's fans  (boston.com) (20)
(National Enquirer) Strange Tonight on stupid human tricks: David Letterman sex tapes, sponsored by Eye Bleach  (nationalenquirer.com) (77)
(Contact Music) Interesting Nutbag with funbags locked in legal battle with scumbags over handbags  (contactmusic.com) (94)
(Contact Music) Interesting Minnie Driver wants more kids. It's not her fault. It's not her fault. It's not her fault. It's not her fault. It's not her fault. It's not her fault. It's not her fault. It's not her fault. It's not her fault  (contactmusic.com) (54)
(Aint-It-Cool-News) Spiffy "The Road" is worth traveling: "Easily the single most human post-apocalyptic movie you are bound ever to see... an Oscar-caliber film that transcends genre and truly captures the essence of Cormac McCarthy's literature"  (aintitcool.com) (165)
(Contact Music) Followup Renee Zellweger denies that she's doing another Bridget Jones film, says that she's putting on weight because she likes to eat  (contactmusic.com) (29)
(AccessAtlanta) Silly Weather Channel to show movies. "It's a way to respond to at least a significant portion of our audience that says, 'Let's expand the definition of weather.'"  (accessatlanta.com) (67)
(Cracked) Amusing Vorst moo-fie ack-sents ev-ah. No, wait: Wuhst muhvie ayksents evuh. No, wait: Woist moivie axxents eavah  (cracked.com) (259)

Tue October 20, 2009
(Starpulse) Dumbass Matt Damon refuses to act in violent films. Jason Bourne, Pvt. James Ryan & Colin Sullivan unavailable for comment  (starpulse.com) (69)
(The Atlantic) Obvious Like "The Sopranos" before it, "Mad Men" gives urban professionals and the self-satisfied media who cater to them a cultural touchstone to be smug about  (theatlantic.com) (115)
(Discovery) Amusing Mike Rowe talks about the confusion his parents feel over his success  (blogs.discovery.com) (100)
(Starpulse) Obvious "What's freaky is the guy behind the camera who is desperate and so excited because he's seeing you walk into a supermarket. I think that's freaky. They're the freaks. I'm not the freak."  (starpulse.com) (61)
(Rasmussen Reports) Interesting Poll shows that most Americans think casino gambling is good for the economy, but bad for society. Kind of like TV reality shows  (rasmussenreports.com) (53)
(NYPost) Obvious Poor Salman Rushdie... He survived a fatwa, but he misses Padma Lakshmi so much he can't stop talking about her. Can you blame him?  (nypost.com) (71)
(The Sun) Sick Russell Brand is getting Katy Perry a petting zoo of fake animals for her 25th birthday and for some reason the Sun runs a picture of him in baby blue undies  (thesun.co.uk) (61)
(FilmDrunk) Dumbass Disney Channel's Selena Gomez set to star in a movie whose plot was already a one-minute Chappelle's Show sketch  (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) (71)
(Starpulse) Scary David Hasselhoff in talks to star in a reality TV show that presumably has something to do with punching doctors and eating cheeseburgers while wasted  (starpulse.com) (13)
(Mirror.co.uk) Interesting Viggo Mortensen lost weight for his flick The Road, but after filming was over, he "went out and made a swine" of himself  (mirror.co.uk) (84)
(Starpulse) Hero Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Nobel Peace Prize winner for 2010: Kelly Osbourne  (starpulse.com) (55)
(Yahoo) Interesting Swisski courtski keepski Polanski behindski barski becauseski flightski riski highski  (news.yahoo.com) (83)
(Gawker) Amusing Defamer puts Gerard Butler on movie star probation: "If he can stay out of the press for three years, he may be rewarded with the starring role on a CBS procedural"  (defamer.gawker.com) (41)
(Starpulse) Unlikely Afraid that other inmates really wanted to hurt him, Boy George took on a mean streak in jail: "I was quite hostile. Very hostile. And very grumpy... The situation required me to be a bit feisty, a bit don't-f**k-with-me"  (starpulse.com) (29)
(Yahoo) Sad ♫ His theme songs, we admired ♫ To him, we all aspired ♫ But now, he has expired ♫ The death of Vic Mizzy ♫ *snap* *snap*  (fe19.story.media.ac4.yahoo.com) (48)
(Contact Music) Silly And the insanity that is the Lohan family continues as Lindsay files a restraining order against her father. Can't we just, I don't know, ship them off to Alaska, Siberia, Canada, or some other godforsaken wasteland?  (contactmusic.com) (55)
(TC Chandler) Cool The top 100 movie posters of all time. No slideshow and pictures of every one  (tccandler.com) (190)

Mon October 19, 2009
(IMDB) Cool Joss Whedon to direct an episode of "Glee". In other news, "Glee" will be promptly moved to Friday night and cancelled  T-Shirt  (imdb.com) (79)
(News.com.au) Cool Steve Irwin's $40 million zoo to open in Las Vegas. I'm sure that it will be a ray of sunshine for everyone  T-Shirt  (news.com.au) (94)
(Onion AV Club) Cool Twenty-one "Appearing as themselves" cameos that pushed the "real life" envelope. And yes, Neil Patrick Harris in "Harold & Kumar" is on the list  (avclub.com) (88)
(CNN) Amusing Mike Rowe and Dirty Jobs return with all "new dirty work in the can." Wait, what?  (cnn.com) (112)
(FilmDrunk) Spiffy Kelly Leak to play Sinestro in new Green Lantern movie starring Deadpool  (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) (52)
(Some Guy) Cool Attention Paris Hilton. Manolo Blahnik doesn't want your skanky ass wearing his shoes anymore  (vogue.co.uk) (37)
(IFC) Amusing "Almost the Truth" now airing, featuring interviews with Monty Python members. There was a funnier headline but the person who sacked the headline writer has been sacked (Sponsored Link)  (ifc.com) (91)
(NYPost) Dumbass Paris Hilton's backstage rider looks a lot like you think it would. Preview: Vodka and live lobsters  (nypost.com) (39)
(Ad Age) Spiffy Noting that local newspapers had cut back on obituaries, a TV station picks up the slack: For $100, you can get your family member's photo and obit on TV  (adage.com) (16)
(Contact Music) Strange Ewan McGregor almost quit acting after watching Daniel Day-Lewis. He probably felt a lot of emotional DRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINAGE at the time  (contactmusic.com) (73)
(Mirror.co.uk) Silly George Clooney wants you to know that making millions while sleeping with an endless array of beautiful starlets won't necessarily make you feel "happy" or "complete." Sure thing George  (celebrifi.com) (77)
(Coming Soon) Stupid Wilmer Valderrama confirmed to star in "The Dog Whisperer," so you can get an early start on buying a ticket to another movie  (comingsoon.net) (41)
(Den Of Geek) Interesting "What I'm about to say is, probably, bordering on blasphemy... but here goes: Heath Ledger wasn't all that, folks. Sorry, sorry, sorry"  (denofgeek.com) (132)
(Contact Music) Amusing Movie bosses ban Cameron Diaz and Mike Myers from Twitter because they don't know how to shut the hell up  (contactmusic.com) (30)
(Contact Music) Cool If you enjoyed such movies as "Die Another Day" and "Doom," there are two things that you should know: 1) you need serious psychiatric help; and 2) Rosamund Pike dates her fans  (contactmusic.com) (56)
(The Sun) Obvious Judge warns Lindsay Lohan that if she violates her probation one more time, SHE'S MOVING WITH HER AUNTIE AND UNCLE IN BEL-AIR  (thesun.co.uk) (56)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Cool CBS to produce two shows from Samuel L. Jackson's TV company. You know the shows on TV? You ARE aware that there's an invention called television, and on this invention, they show shows, right?  T-Shirt  (hollywoodreporter.com) (26)
(Gothamist) Amusing Mystery Science Theater 3000 creator Joel Hodgson shares his thoughts about Cinematic Titanic, MST3K, and his devoted fans: "We got a box of toenails. In return, we sent the person a thank you restraining order"  (laist.com) (87)
(New York Daily News) Interesting Thieves break into Kourtney Kardashian's home and steal $80,000 worth of jewelry. That's a LOT of cubic zirconia  (nydailynews.com) (45)

Displayed 114 of about 1474 links -- join TotalFark to see them all
Fark Showbiz Forum


Showbiz Farkives:    Complete archives