FARK.com: Showbiz links -- Archives for 2009-09-13

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Sun September 13, 2009

Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		Jim Carroll has completed his diary (artsbeat.blogs.nytimes.com)	(49)
		Amanda Seyfried: "There's a lot of tongue involved in the younger generation when I make out with my co-stars" (google.com)	(36)
(Some Guy)		Old lady who was first in line for the Michigan Avenue Oprah taping wants Oprah to do something about it after getting shuffled half a block back by rampaging crowd (chicagotribune.com)	(29)
		Love him or hate him, the publishing industry has a lot riding on the success or failure of Dan Brown's "The Lost Symbol" (miamiherald.com)	(60)
		Cybill Shepherd says she dumped Elvis Presley when he offered her drugs (nowmagazine.co.uk)	(39)
		Tina Fey won an Emmy for her portrayal of Sarah Palin; Fey said in honor of Palin, "Palin is an inspiration to working mothers everywhere because she bailed on her job right before Fourth of July weekend." (contactmusic.com)	(52)
		Elton John wants to adopt a child; figures if they'll give kids to Madonna and Angelina Jolie, he can get one too (contactmusic.com)	(24)
		Jack Osbourne tells strange women who flirt with him to "f*ck off." Yeah, I'm sure that happens a lot (contactmusic.com)	(36)
		Disney World getting a new Fantasyland full of princesses in order to fight off He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named (orlandosentinel.com)	(48)
		Man described as 'super repo man' sues writer who plans to leak all his secrets in upcoming movie based on his life, including that repo men work all night every night (hosted.ap.org)	(41)
(Some Guy)		Australian schools ban Twilight vampire series. Will this madness never end? (keepingthedoor.com)	(44)
		Scientists at a loss to explain baffling tectonic shift of Kristin Davis's face (dailymail.co.uk)	(60)
(Some Guy)		10 things women believe about men from watching romantic comedies, including, "If he hates you, that really means he loves you," and "Sex is a beautiful, tender, and romantic act. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME" (thefrisky.com)	(108)

Sat September 12, 2009

	Biopic about the life of world reknowned scientist, a man so well respected the Australians named a city after him, is unable to get US distributor because "his theory of evolution is too controversial for Americans" (smh.com.au)	(220)
	Lost producers reveal that not all answers will be revealed in the final season, and fans might have to wait for spinoff series before they understand what's going on (slashfilm.com)	(136)
	Erin Andrews told Oprah she thought her career was over when a nude video of her was leaked on the web. Yeah, beacuse having naked pictures of yourself on the web is SUCH a career killer for attractive female celebrities (news.yahoo.com)	(72)
	Roger Corman is getting an Oscar. Ed Wood's ghost groans, throws off cheap cape in fury (chud.com)	(32)
	"Fanboys aren't used to being popular. Most actually like being on the fringe." Half of that statement is true (variety.com)	(14)
	Some plotlines for the "Sex And The City" sequel you won't see. Subby's proposal in which the "girls" are at the mercy of mutant, chainsaw-wielding maniacs in the backwoods missing (abcnews.go.com)	(19)
(Some Guy)	George Clooney's secret longtime boyfriend steps forward and proposes marriage (gabbybabble.celebuzz.com)	(30)
	Why is James Patterson worth $150 million? Because people just love thin characters, obvious plots, and small chapters that make Dr. Seuss look long-winded (forbes.com)	(47)
	With Hollywood still out of ideas an "Easy Rider" sequel begins filming next month. Bonus: It's the first film of a new trilogy (contactmusic.com)	(29)
	Audrina Patridge files for restraining order against creepy fan. How can someone who contributes nothing to society have a fan? (starpulse.com)	(37)
	Kelly Osbourne blasts lazy British teenagers who want to ride another's coattails to success (contactmusic.com)	(32)
	Fired SNLer Casey Wilson says she wasn't fired for being fat. "The issue isn't that I'm too fat, it's that I'm too phat. Can I get a what-what?" No really. She said that (digitalspy.com)	(77)
	As tragic as Bernie Mac's death was, it has saved us from getting "Ocean's Fourteen" (contactmusic.com)	(61)

Fri September 11, 2009

	'Yeah? Well that's just, like, your opinion, pilgrim.' Coen Bros cast Jeff Lebowski in remake of True Grit (filmdrunk.uproxx.com)	(64)
	ABC to auction off LOST memorabilia and props after the show concludes next summer. Now you too can own Locke's hunting knife, Hurley's lottery ticket or your own little piece of Artz (io9.com)	(83)
(NYMag)	David Cross clarifies status of "Arrested Development": "There's no movie - there's not not a movie, but there's no movie" (nymag.com)	(90)
	Manhattan federal judge yadda yadda yadda tells woman who accused Jerry Seinfeld's wife of stealing her cookbook idea no money for you as he tosses her lawsuit about nothing (nypost.com)	(24)
	Lindsay Lohan aspired to be like Britney Spears. That explains everything (starpulse.com)	(35)
(AMC)	Ranking the Star Trek movie directors. Yep, director of "Wrath of Khan" is first, but, suprisingly, Shatner is not last (blogs.amctv.com)	(198)
(Some Guy)	"If The Beatles came on the show we would have said, 'We'll take those three Paul McCartney, John Lennon and George Harrison but probably lose the drummer'" (gabbybabble.celebuzz.com)	(142)
	What do Hitler, Einstein, Obama, and Paris Hilton have in common? Go on, guess (reuters.com)	(96)
	Jennifer Aniston says she's taking a break from acting, which is odd because there's no evidence she ever started (foxnews.com)	(80)
	Maura Tierney drops out of new TV series because of breast cancer (msnbc.msn.com)	(83)

Thu September 10, 2009

(TV Munchies)	First review of the new Jay Leno Show. Hint: it's pretty much identical to the old Jay Leno show (tvmunchies.com)	(70)
	Activision responds to Courtney Love's insistence via Twitter that she had no idea Kurt Cobain's image would be able to sing others' songs - "Yeah, she's a lying biatch" (avclub.com)	(71)
	From liberal consumer advocate to outspoken libertarian, John Stossel has evolved over the years. Now he completes his move to the dark side by leaving ABC for Fox News (mediabistro.com)	(88)
	Heavy Metal Kings Mastodon to score new Jonah Hex movie. Get the smelling salts, subby just fainted from the over-whelming awesome (aintitcool.com)	(80)
	James Cameron is remaking The Abyss, but this time in 3-D and with cat people (w/ NSFW pic) (filmdrunk.uproxx.com)	(78)
	Former ABC anchor Carole Simpson says legitimate TV news is dying. We'll have more on this story after a Jon and Kate Plus 8 update, and it looks like Britney and Li-Lo are at it again (contactmusic.com)	(38)
	Katherine Heigl and her husband adopt a Korean child, which means she doesn't have to get pregnant herself and quit chain smoking (people.com)	(100)
	How Hollywood is like Budweiser (kansascity.com)	(60)
	Charlie Sheen demands meeting with President Obama to discuss how the Federal Government was behind 9/11, but remember, it's the birthers that are crazy (foxnews.com)	(289)
	He's single again, ladies (tmz.com)	(127)
	Yoko Ono isn't quite done ruining the Beatles (news.com.au)	(102)
	Turns out that SNL fired actress Casey Wilson because they ordered her to lose 30 pounds and she didn't, just like they did with John Belushi and Chris Farley (eonline.com)	(186)
	Well, it looks like Jessica Simpson's gone through the rotation and is back at the top of the order (contactmusic.com)	(44)
	American Idol defies all odds, becomes even more unwatchable by adding new judge Ellen DeGeneres (news.yahoo.com)	(89)

Wed September 09, 2009

	Liza Minnelli and Miley Cyrus sign up for Sex and the City sequel (contactmusic.com)	(36)
	Jay Leno: "Television is dying, it's not doing well." And his new show is going to smother it with a pillow just to make sure (jam.canoe.ca)	(59)
(M&C)	National Geographic Channel to show documentary about Western men meeting their Russian mail-order brides in Togliatti, known charmingly as "Russia's Detroit" (monstersandcritics.com)	(39)
(Pitchfork)	Henry Rollins plays rich, white supremacist villain in 2nd season of "Sons of Anarchy". How will we possibly wrap our heads around that? (pitchfork.com)	(64)
	DC comics finally wises up and starts acting like Marvel (aintitcool.com)	(86)
	"Courtney Love and Dave Grohl, corporate c--k-s--ing memory-destroying fret-wanking MTV-supporting fame-chasing money-grabbing grave-turning publicity-loving vacuous spoiled jaded c---ing rock whores" (idolator.com)	(89)
	In this new trailer for Up in the Air, George Clooney says you should stuff your wife in a backpack (filmdrunk.uproxx.com)	(16)
	"I'm kind of the Anti-Christ to these comic book geeks. Every single person that wrote sh*t went to see that movie multiple times... a movie doesn't gross $200 million unless people go to see it more than once." (starpulse.com)	(64)
	Oliver Stone worried that his film about Hugo Chavez won't be greeted by US moviegoers as rapturously as they normally greet documentaries about leftist leaders seeking independence from the IMF (reuters.com)	(57)
	Nick Cage will not suck in the Green Hornet movie (aintitcool.com)	(42)
	Roger Ebert tries to submit contentious evolution discussion thread to Guinness Book of World Records as Longest Single Thread On The Internet. Fark beer snobs scoff (blogs.suntimes.com)	(50)
	Hindu leaders fear Keanu Reeves' incarnation of Lord Vishnu in new movie could be the most damaging insult to their religion since Mike Myers' "Love Guru" (jam.canoe.ca)	(45)
	You want to sing like T-Pain? There's an app for that. And maybe a lobotomy (new.music.yahoo.com)	(42)
	Holy comic book cover remixes, Batman (wired.com)	(83)
	"Chuck" producer developing new sci-fi TV series based on a "gunslinger caught between worlds." Roland sighs, remembers ka is a biatch (reuters.com)	(107)
	Next up on Death's red carpet, Army Archerd dead at 87 (news.yahoo.com)	(28)
(US Magazine)	Damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn damn (usmagazine.com)	(117)
	Lady Gaga admits she used to do loads of cocaine - which is why you can hardly even see her penis (3news.co.nz)	(75)

Tue September 08, 2009

	Tolkien estate settles $150 million lawsuit, clears the way for production of a two-film version of 'The Hobbit' (reuters.com)	(97)
(buzzfeed)	To satiate the world's hunger for the comic stylings of Dave Coulier, entire run of Full House now available on DVD (buzzfeed.com)	(62)
(G & G)	Rose McGowan has part of her elbow removed (gossipandgab.com)	(72)
	Emma Watson: "I want my university experience to be as normal as possible." And by 'normal', she means arriving in a helicopter (nzherald.co.nz)	(84)
	Apparently Jennifer Aniston is insatiable in the sack (contactmusic.com)	(202)
	Kate Beckinsale says she is not doing the fourth Underworld film for fears she'll embarrass her daughter. Good to know she's got some self-respect for her kid (contactmusic.com)	(95)
	Hilary Swank has been farking her agent for a couple of years, which explains why she's divorcing Chad Lowe. Still no explanation for her Adam's apple, though (contactmusic.com)	(117)
	David Hasselhoff to perform at Berlin wall anniversary. East Germans consider rebuilding the wall (contactmusic.com)	(23)
	50 Cent does not regret being a teenage drug dealer; after all, it got him where he is today. Great message for the kids, Mr. Cent (contactmusic.com)	(60)
	"He's just a thrower" - The three most baffling fight scenes in movie history (cracked.com)	(79)
	"I have a cunning plan, Timelord" - Blackadder creator Richard Curtis to write a Doctor Who story for upcoming Doctor Matt Smith (guardian.co.uk)	(60)
	What is the world coming to, when trustworthy Perez Hilton can't even keep a promise he made to Tyra? (nydailynews.com)	(35)
	English man dressed as James Bond wins "human statue" competition by remaining stiff and expressionless for four hours, essentially matching Roger Moore's performances in "Octopussy" and "View to a Kill" (news.bbc.co.uk)	(45)
	Actress fired after 14 years for claiming scenes with teh ghey in them wasn't in the contract or the bible (foxnews.com)	(279)
	Man who was "helicopter zombie'' in 1978's "Dawn of the Dead" still has a cult following after 30 years (pennlive.com)	(61)
	Oliver Stone to continue his series of movies about the world's most-loved politicians with a doco on Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (3news.co.nz)	(22)

Mon September 07, 2009

	Writer criticizes Russell Crowe for eating fatty foods and smoking. He challenges her to a 12 mile bike race. She lags behind and falls off her bike, while he sails past her effortlessly. ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED? (foxnews.com)	(110)
	Former Sweathog Arnold Horshack is now a high school teacher. They tease him a lot cause they've got him on the spot (tcpalm.com)	(45)
	Rob Zombie to release "The Haunted World of El Superbeasto," described as " 'Austin Powers' meets 'The Munsters' by way of 'A Hard Day's Night.'" So as usual, lots of plagiarism (variety.com)	(40)
	Wil Wheaton gets serenaded by Jonathan Coulton at the Penny Arcade Expo 2009 (youtube.com)	(79)
(Momento24.com)	Producers of "Gia" plan to release "erotic and uncensored" lesbianic scenes starring Angelina Jolie (momento24.com)	(133)
	Comedian wins award for best publicity stunt after convincing the media that he is the new sponsor of the award for best publicity stunt. Well played, sir (news.bbc.co.uk)	(12)
	Kathy Griffin says she was an unattractive, talentless magnet for gay guys back in high school. Good thing that changed (suntimes.com)	(64)
	Scarlett Johansson says that she's terrified of performing for a live audience because she suffers from stage fright. It certainly sounds better than "I don't want to be seen on the same stage as Pete Yorn" (contactmusic.com)	(25)
	Joker voted world's best-loved villain. Darth Vader would've topped the list but seeing him cry and whine in Episodes I & II puts him at the bottom, right behind Jack Frost, The Lawnmower man and The Leprechaun (contactmusic.com)	(124)
	Paste lists some of the slowest, most tedious movies of all time. Surprisingly, with Warhol they managed to narrow it down to just one work (pastemagazine.com)	(133)