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Sun July 26, 2009
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Daily Mail) Obvious Orlando Bloom is skipping the next "Pirates of the Caribbean" sequel so he can spend more quality time with his beard  (dailymail.co.uk) (57)
(Yahoo) Asinine G-Force tops box office this week. Really, America, G-Force? Really?  (movies.yahoo.com) (142)
(MSNBC) Asinine Jon Gosselin says he's just a regular guy. A regular guy who's about to learn what eight child support checks look like coming out of your bank account every month  (msnbc.msn.com) (62)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Amusing Ending of "Lost" revealed at Comic-Con? Not exactly  (thrfeed.com) (56)
(Wordpress) Weird You can haz lolmusical. I don't know why you'd want to, but you can  (icanhascheezburgerthemusiclol.wordpress.com) (16)
(NYPost) Obvious Good Morning America bounced dancing newlyweds out of their hotel and canceled their airline tickets to fly home because they committed the unpardonable crime of pre-taping a segment for the Today Show  (nypost.com) (67)
(People Magazine) Unlikely Introducing your judges tonight, Randy Jackson, Simon Cowell... and Jennifer Lopez?  (feeds.people.com) (24)
(Some Guy) Amusing "Asteroids" movie plot revealed: "It's about two brothers - who have to go through a seminal experience to figure out their relationship" In other words, Gay Porn  (screenrant.com) (28)
(Entertainment Weekly) Cool Mike Judge's new film"'Extract" introduced at Comic-Con. Starring Jason Bateman and Mila Kunis, it could be the next 'Office Space'  (popwatch.ew.com) (102)
(YouTube) Amusing Andrew W.K. does the weather for Tulsa TV station ... then later gets charged with "inappropriate content" for some inexplicable reason  (youtube.com) (62)
(Entertainment Weekly) Obvious 1984 was the greatest year in movies...ever  (popwatch.ew.com) (185)
(G4TV) Weird Megan Fox: "I apologize to your penis"  (g4tv.com) (86)
(Mediaite) Amusing Eerie resemblances between members of American news media universe and members of Harry Potter universe. Bill'O IS Draco  (mediaite.com) (32)
(Cracked) Amusing 7 ads that have no clue what they're selling  (cracked.net) (36)
(Bitten and Bound) Sad American Idol's 'Glitter Girl' loses her sparkle forever - RIP  (bittenandbound.com) (60)
(LA Times) Amusing Seth MacFarlane on banned Family Guy abortion episode, upcoming "Empire Strikes Back" spoof at Comic-Con: "Is anybody here NOT stoned?"  (latimesblogs.latimes.com) (58)

Sat July 25, 2009
(Huffington Post) Interesting Brad Pitt doesn't believe in God, despite having regular sex with Angelina Jolie  T-Shirt  (huffingtonpost.com) (138)
(G4TV) Obvious Lost Producers: "It's our goal for you to watch the final season and not know what we're going to do next."  (g4tv.com) (68)
(G4TV) Sad Peter Jackson and James Cameron: the "really big" films that we make might not be possible to make soon  (g4tv.com) (45)
(G4TV) Video Olivia Munn dons a cleavage-heavy Princess Leia outfit and you've stopped reading this headline  (g4tv.com) (150)
(Huffington Post) Cool Hollywood is out of ideas, but not older hotties. Here's a look at who is aging the best  (huffingtonpost.com) (99)
(Entertainment Weekly) Spiffy "The Simpsons" announces 21 celebrity guest voices for new season, including Sara Silverman, Seth Rogan and all 3 Manning brothers. In other news, people still watch 'The Simpsons'  (hollywoodinsider.ew.com) (102)
(Contact Music) Followup OJ Simpson is convinced his cellmate wants to kill him. Hopefully, he learned how to orchestrate a prison escape from Naked Gun 33 1/3  (contactmusic.com) (40)
(Entertainment Weekly) Cool Joss Whedon talks "Dollhouse" at Comic-Con, shows an unaired episode (spoiler warning)  (popwatch.ew.com) (33)
(Dvice.com) Cool Lego Zombie Invasion  (dvice.com) (25)
(UPI) Cool "What if we do a 'Rescue Me' movie, but they're not firefighters and it's a zombie movie?" Another brilliant idea by Denis Leary shot down by no-imagination Hollywood suits  (upi.com) (36)
(People Magazine) Stupid "Kate Gosselin takes off her wedding band" -- It's not news, it's People Magazine  (feeds.people.com) (31)
(People Magazine) Interesting Bad news: LeAnn Rimes and husband separating. Good news: She sure ain't no little country girl anymore. Subby calls dibs  (feeds.people.com) (42)
(Yahoo) Interesting Michael Jackson's estate is solvent. That must have taken a lot of acetone  (news.yahoo.com) (17)
(Daily Mail) Amusing Top Gear's Jeremy Clarkson calls Gordon Brown a "silly c*nt" whilst doing the warm-up for a taping. Hi-la-ir-it-ey ensues  (dailymail.co.uk) (43)
(Yahoo) Unlikely Paris Hilton: I'm not Paris Hilton  (news.yahoo.com) (75)
(The Sun) Caption Caption Jude Law striking this photographer  (img.thesun.co.uk) (129)

Fri July 24, 2009
(Starpulse) Followup Megan Fox claims that she didn't turn down a role in the next James Bond movie, insists that "Vapid Car-Washing Skank: The Movie" is still a go  (starpulse.com) (43)
(Starpulse) Dumbass Diddy is still under the delusion that he would be a good choice to play James Bond: "Nobody's called me back yet. Bond people, I'm here waiting. My number's listed. I'm waiting to get a crack."  (starpulse.com) (111)
(LA Times) Amusing Author reports on visiting his first Comic-Con in twenty years. "I was hoping to see more actual comic-inspired people -- a Funky Winkerbean would have been nice, maybe Beetle Bailey or those darling Family Circus scamps too"  (latimesblogs.latimes.com) (29)
(CNN) Asinine Today's ground breaking investigative journalism form CNN: "Do Women Watch Dirty Movies?" It's not news, It's...oh never farking mind  (cnn.com) (256)
(SlashFilm) Unlikely Gary Oldman claims Batman sequel will begin shooting in 2010, but we didn't hear it from him  (slashfilm.com) (68)
(Straits Times) Sad Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick to separate; and here we thought their relationship was stable  T-Shirt  (straitstimes.com) (306)
(Fox News) Misc Michael Jackson's nose is missing. Eeeeeew  (foxnews.com) (85)
(Daily Mail) Obvious Celebrities can get sunburned when they hang out at the beach. It's not news, it's The Daily Mail  (dailymail.co.uk) (21)
(Aint-It-Cool-News) Cool Report on footage from James Cameron's 3D "Avatar". You couldn't handle this on strong acid, man  (aintitcool.com) (59)
(Daily Mail) Cool Tom lets Katie out of the cage long enough to show up for a song-and-dance routine on "So You Think You Can Dance." Surprisingly, she's somehow hot again  (dailymail.co.uk) (59)
(Guardian.com) Obvious A critic explains why the moviegoing public is stupid because they insist on buying millions of tickets to movies that critics like him hate  (guardian.co.uk) (130)
(WWTDD) Amusing Mickey Rourke+Alcohol+Traffic Barriers=the best pictures you'll see all day  (wwtdd.com) (45)
(The Sun) Silly Lindsay Lohan creates her own mixture at Millions of Milkshakes: a flake-topped berry and cream drink, presumably served in a bottomless cup  (thesun.co.uk) (45)
(FilmDrunk) Sad Sure, George Lucas ruined your childhood. But he destroyed this kid's entire life  (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) (142)
(Entertainment Weekly) Silly "Torchwood" boss tells upset fans to get over it. "Find something else. Go look at poetry. Poetry's wonderful" (spoilers)  (ausiellofiles.ew.com) (113)
(G4TV) Cool Not News: Marvel comic being turned into movie. News: Nic Cage is the bad guy. Fark: McLovin is the hero  (g4tv.com) (50)
(ClusterStock) Asinine Cool: Oliver Stone plans "Wall Street" sequel in which short-selling hedge fund manager collapses the global economy. Asinine: Starring that Le Beef guy from the Transformers movies  (businessinsider.com) (36)
(Mediaweek) Interesting Conan O'Brien, on his way to having HALF the audience Jay Leno had, challenges Letterman to a staring contest  (mediaweek.com) (69)
(HitFix) Interesting Robert Zemeckis teases about a possible "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?" sequel  (hitfix.com) (54)
(Some Perry) Cool Tyler Perry takes disadvantaged Tyler Perry Philadelphia kids involved in Tyler Perry swimming pool dispute to Tyler Perry Disney World. Tyler Perry  (bvblackspin.com) (46)

Thu July 23, 2009
(WWTDD) Cool Jennifer Connelly. Beach. Bikini. Quit reading this. What's wrong with you?? Purple monkey dishwasher  (wwtdd.com) (104)
(UGO) Spiffy Stan Lee will be in "Thor" film, but not as Odin as he sort of hoped (Gotta love the guy)  (movieblog.ugo.com) (30)
(UGO) Cool The first look at the new show "Titan Maximum", the Robot Chicken folks' new send up of Voltron and the like  (tvblog.ugo.com) (12)
(Some Guy) Interesting Heath Ledger's NYC apartment building sold for $15 million at foreclosure auction. Why SoHo serious?  T-Shirt  (9wsyr.com) (24)
(Mirror.co.uk) Strange Simon Cowell apparently likes getting critiqued as much as he likes dishing it out. Invites 17 ex-girlfriends to his birthday party  (mirror.co.uk) (36)
(WCBS 880) Interesting Singer Amy Winehouse has made herself appear somewhat respectable...at least as respectable as a drug addicted woman arriving at court to face an assault charge can appear  (wcbs880.com) (71)
(The Sun) Interesting Creepy-looking Norwegian son of Michael Jackson now seeks DNA proof 25 years later  (thesun.co.uk) (62)
(E! Online) Followup Jon Gosselin is dating yet another blonde-twenty-something. No not that one, a different one whose name is also Kate  (eonline.com) (152)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Cool ABC renews "Wipeout" for 3rd season, more big balls  (hollywoodreporter.com) (106)
(Deadspin) Hero ESPN to New York Post: "You're Fired"  (deadspin.com) (101)
(Contact Music) Strange Carol Channing is alive and well and soon to be the subject of a biopic, and she hopes that Johnny Depp will play her in the film  (contactmusic.com) (31)

Wed July 22, 2009
(Some Guy) Obvious Michael Jackson Assassinated By CIA... well duh  (fourwinds10.com) (44)
(BBC) Interesting Michael Jackson's doctor's clinic raided for signs of manslaughter. Next up: Neverland, for signs of children's laughter  (news.bbc.co.uk) (76)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Spiffy The CW's new 'Melrose Place' posters look like trashy paperbacks that are poorly written and full of unrealistic sex. Like 'Melrose Place,' in other words  (thrfeed.com) (30)
(Canada.com) Silly Age of newspapers being irrelevant finally over thanks to this interactive tour of Michael Jackson's medicine cabinet  (calgaryherald.com) (11)
(Gawker) Silly Fox and Friends go all ga-ga over the Hoff  (gawker.com) (16)
(Mediabistro) Obvious Once again, Fox News has top 10 cable news shows. If only hippies could afford cable television  (mediabistro.com) (86)
(CTV) Sad Les Lye, who played every adult on "You Can't Do That on Television" passes away at age 84. Was there a better children's character actor? I don't know. *SPLAT*  (ottawa.ctv.ca) (419)
(Aint-It-Cool-News) Cool Tron Abides  (aintitcool.com) (61)
(Starpulse) Ironic Lindsay Lohan to Mischa Barton: "You need help". Ironic tag on suicide watch  (starpulse.com) (40)
(Coming Soon) Cool First "look" at Freddy Krueger in the completely unnecessary remake of Nightmare on Elm Street  (comingsoon.net) (60)
(Starpulse) Followup Kiefer Sutherland cleared of assault charges, is free to tackle Christmas trees while drunk off his ass  (starpulse.com) (25)
(theGauntlet) Fail Regis shows he is still cool by having Twisted Sister on his show, 25 years too late, then calls Dee Snyder "Dee Smith"  (thegauntlet.com) (42)
(CBC) Video Here's Alex Trebek working as a newscaster in 1965, with his Diego mustache and greasy hair. Moo  (archives.cbc.ca) (50)
(Daily Mail) Stupid Having no other news to report on, Suri Cruise spotted going out in public in tennis shoes similar to famous father's  (dailymail.co.uk) (20)
(Starpulse) Stupid Megan Fox turns down offer to play a Bond girl, claims that she would have wanted to "be a more central part of the movie." In related news, don't miss Megan Fox's starring role in "Vapid Car-Washing Skank: The Movie"  (starpulse.com) (147)
(Contact Music) Scary For those of you who like to smell like sewage treatment plants, beer cans with cigarettes in them, and smoldering garbage, you'll be glad to know that Amy Winehouse has a perfume line in the works  (contactmusic.com) (65)
(Answers.com) Cool "I'll take 69 for 200, Trebek." "No, Mr. Connery, you fool. The category is 'My Birthday'" "You sure, Trebek? Because your mom and I were doing 69 last night"  (answers.com) (70)
(People Magazine) Misc Gidget the Taco Bell Chihuahua has died at the age of 16. "Sad"? "Cool"? Eh, let's split the difference and go with the under-appreciated "Misc"  (people.com) (96)
(Variety) Spiffy Bruce Lee museum, three-part biopic in the works. Take THAT, Chuck Norris  (variety.com) (44)
(Contact Music) Interesting Nicolas Cage shuns party for upcoming movie, instead spends time chatting with a homeless fan. Cage was shocked to learn the man lost everything after backing production of The Wicker Man  (contactmusic.com) (51)
(The Scotsman) Cool With their first cd due out on July 27th following a long hiatus, A-Ha's cheekbones are ready to take you on...again  (news.scotsman.com) (78)
(AP) Followup Pot potting potter player pays paltry penalty  (hosted.ap.org) (28)
(movieweb.com) Stupid Sam Raimi to direct "World of Warcraft" movie, arrange for exclusive evening showtimes so that gamers won't be exposed to direct sunlight  (movieweb.com) (159)
(Daily Stab) Stupid Miley Cyrus is in the same league as Aretha Franklin, Mariah Carey and Whitney Houston? Who knew?  (dailystab.com) (80)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Interesting Would you pay more for Hurley's winning Lotto ticket or Locke's hunting knife? This is no longer a hypothetical question  (thrfeed.com) (23)
(Some Guy) Amusing Seth Rogen responds to "Entourage" episode where it is pointed out that nobody like Katherine Heigl would every sleep with his fat, hairy ass  (movieline.com) (91)
(Daily Stab) Spiffy Jake Gyllenhaal movie poster for "Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time". Mmmm.... beefy  (dailystab.com) (64)
(Entertainment Weekly) Fail Entertainment Weekly composes another spot-on list of the top twenty-one comic book movies...wait, "American Splendor" made the list? What the hell?  (ew.com) (95)
(SeattlePI) Scary Paris Hilton seen by Americans an average of 84 times a year  (blog.seattlepi.com) (26)

Tue July 21, 2009
(Yahoo) Sad Everyone's favorite Baldwin brother files for bankruptcy. No, not that one. And not THAT one either. And not HIM, either - geez, guys. THE CUTE ONE  (news.yahoo.com) (53)
(Comedy Central) Silly "I'm doing a lot for the roast. I'm douching regularly"  (comedycentral.com) (44)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Interesting During an interview, "Antichrist" director agreed that the film was misogynistic, deliberately provocative and turgid. In other words, an instant hit  (hollywoodreporter.com) (33)
(Some Guy) Amusing James Caan, at 69, still goes out to clubs. With hilarious "Get off my club/get off my lawn" pic  (celebrityclubber.com) (26)
(Huffington Post) Video Nine weirdest Japanese commercials of all time. Here comes the Ran Ran RUUU  (huffingtonpost.com) (35)
(Variety) Silly "The Green Hornet": Starring Seth Rogen, directed by Michel Gondry, and co-starring Nicholas Cage as the villain. They'll have to invent new words for how much this will suck  (variety.com) (89)
(Daily Mail) Followup Lindsay Lohan gets in a fight with her girlfriend over Drea De Matteo, who is looking more and more like Tatum O'Neal everyday  (dailymail.co.uk) (69)
(Entertainment Weekly) Unlikely Joe Jackson says that rumors that he plans to turn Michael Jackson's kids into "The Jackson 3" are a "bunch of jive."  (news-briefs.ew.com) (31)
(Baltimore Sun) Cool Now you can enjoy blue wang in the privacy of your own home. Watchmen released today  (baltimoresun.com) (116)
(SlashFilm) Amusing Japanese girl goes batshiat insane when Harry Potter's Daniel Radcliffe lets her put on his robe and wizard hat  (slashfilm.com) (122)
(Daily Mail) Spiffy After the recent deaths of Ed McMahon, Michael Jackson, Karl Malden, Walter Cronkite, Farrah Fawcett, and Billy Mays, apparently the Grim Reaper is too tired to hunt down Patrick Swayze  (dailymail.co.uk) (86)
(Den Of Geek) Interesting The four things that need fixing with modern day horror movies. Making them scarier would be a start  (denofgeek.com) (316)
(Contact Music) Followup What can Brown do for you? Put you in the same English Comp class as Emma Watson  (contactmusic.com) (129)
(wptv.com) Dumbass 'Burn Notice' star arrested for getting lit (with mug)  (wptv.com) (153)
(Contact Music) Dumbass Heather Mills thinks anyone who has written lies about her should get cancer. Stay classy there Heather  (contactmusic.com) (36)

Mon July 20, 2009
(Yahoo) Obvious Sony bids $50m for Michael Jackson rehearsal video, scolds wife for not having VCR ready during Entertainment Tonight for the last two weeks  (news.yahoo.com) (11)
(Some Guy) Interesting Playing Neil Armstrong in the movies or on TV is as much a career-killer as playing Jesus  (blogs.houstonpress.com) (86)
(New York Daily News) Interesting Oprah's ratings are falling. Attention housewives and unemployed loser shut-ins: start watching her again or she'll kill us all  (nydailynews.com) (54)
(Warming Glow) Silly Entourage inspires one woman to read The Great Gatsby, and everyone else who watches it to be a massive douchebag  (warmingglow.uproxx.com) (118)
(Baltimore Sun) Interesting Man claims religion gets the worst press coverage. And looking at his beard, he knows all about bad coverage  (baltimoresun.com) (70)
(Dlisted) Obvious Cyndi Lauper still looks damn good, despite having "Frozen Barbie Face"  (dlisted.com) (113)
(The Sun) Silly Tucker Carlson, Lord of Time  (thesun.co.uk) (74)
(FilmDrunk) Asinine Voltron movie going forward. Producer calls Voltron "a personification of the human spirit"  (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) (101)
(The New York Times) Interesting Saudi Arabia cancels the country's only film festival on news that the movies will feature people doing things other than praying and beating women for not covering their ankles  (artsbeat.blogs.nytimes.com) (83)
(The Sun) Followup How to piss of Gwenyth Paltrow? Put her younger, hotter doppleganger on the Iron Man 2 poster instead of her  (thesun.co.uk) (86)
(Huffington Post) Followup Ayman Abu Aita, Bruno's "Terrorist," Threatens Legal Action  (huffingtonpost.com) (31)
(New York Daily News) Unlikely Maybe Russell Crowe isn't a dick?  (nydailynews.com) (68)
(Starpulse) Sad Jimmy Page explains why there won't be any Led Zeppelin tunes for Rock Band or Guitar Hero. Exposing new generations to his music through car commercials is okay though  (starpulse.com) (247)
(BBSpot) Cool Transformers 3 to feature record breaking two-hour explosion  (bbspot.com) (48)
(People Magazine) Asinine Kate Gosselin gets upset when cameramen take pictures of her kids. The ones that aren't paying her that is  (people.com) (110)
(NYPost) Interesting David Byrne almost hit Paris Hilton with his bike. Better luck next time, Dave  (nypost.com) (33)
(Starpulse) Obvious Anna Paquin returning to college. No word on when she'll be returning to the dentist  (starpulse.com) (92)
(The Daily) Sick Pink is in the stink  (thedaily.com.au) (54)

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