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Sun November 30, 2008
(LA Times) Interesting When box office receipts were down two years ago, conservatives began gloating at the death of Hollywood liberalism. Now Nancy Pelosi is queen of America and some shlockfest called Four Christmases made 50 million (44)
(Now Magazine) Interesting Angelina Jolie has no regrets about drug taking, lesbian sex, slicing up her dewy skin or running off with Jen's husband (26)
(Geno's World) Fail Candice Cameron Bure talks about giving her kids only one present on Christmas and making them feed the hungry and help the poor. What a horrible mother (41)
(CBS 2 Lost Angeles) Sad Pop radio innovator Bill Drake, falls out of the Top 40 at age 71 (7)
(Now Magazine) Interesting "I've tried modelling, TV presenting and acting so now I'm going into interior design" - another celebrity kid follows classic career path which ends up in serving fries at McD's (21)
(Now Magazine) Interesting "I'd kiss 54-year-old Kim Basinger but I don't want to snog 63-year-old Helen Mirren." (33)
(Some Guy) Unlikely Writer talks "X-Files 3." He wants to believe (33)
(Stuff) Misc Mary-Kate Olsens vagina has a no vacancy sign hanging on the wall (45)
(Chud) Sad The most awesome movies never made. Check out H.R. Giger's design of "Dune"'s sandworms (32)
(Yahoo) Spiffy It's been 25 years - and 14,789 airings on TNT - since Ralphie first schemed and plotted a way to get a Red Ryder BB gun from Santa (72)
(People Magazine) Interesting First Ann Coulter has her jaw wired shut, now Rachel Ray is having vocal chord surgery. Sorry atheists, the argument's over and you lose (52)
(Some Guy) Interesting Two finalist on VH1's "The Pickup Artist 2" say getting rejected on national TV while trying out pickup tips from an anorexic Slash look-alike has helped build their confidence with women (35)
(Starpulse) Interesting Iron Man, glass jaw (28)
(AP) Sad The fat lady finally sings: Sydney Opera House designer Joern Utzon dead at 90 (30)
(Omaha World Herald) Stupid Brightly colored tights, leg warmers are hot fashion accessories. This headline is not a repeat from 1983 (44)
(SeattlePI) Dumbass Rosie O'Donnell's blog: "There will B no more variety show. It was still a thrill 4 me. I am happy 2 have had the opportunity." Wow, typing like that saved you 5 letters. I bet thats still more viewers than U had (65)
(News.com.au) Sad Victoria's Secret angel Miranda Kerr engaged to Pirate Orlando Bloom. Both sexes mourn (55)

Sat November 29, 2008
(Oregon Live) Strange Celebrated poet wins $20,000 arts grant to walk, bike, and take public transit around Portland for a year and write a report on the experience (40)
(Now Magazine) Interesting Monty Python star John Cleese admits having hair transplant to disguise "strange pointy head" - and the fact, of course, he's nearly 70 and bald (30)
(Some Cletus) Sad Alabama NBC affiliate hires local public school product to write headlines for great justice (32)
(Hari Seldon) Cool Foundation is coming. Will it be as awesome as "I, Robot?" (90)
(ABC News) Sad Man at Coldplay concert dies of something besides embarrassment (67)
(Some Guy) Obvious In most stunning comics twist since Lucy pulled that football away from Charlie Brown, DC Comics editor announces Bruce Wayne is not dead (62)
(The Sun) Weird After freaking the Indian community with her Halloween costume, Heidi Klum empties out a pouch full of her own teeth on The Jay Leno Show (54)

Fri November 28, 2008
(Entertainment Weekly) Obvious A message to adult males who might be curious about this "Twilight" phenomenon (94)
(The Superficial) Dumbass Britney poses for Rolling Stone like white trash she is: "Here's mah belly, y'all. It'll sell them maggerzines" (99)
(Backseat Cuddler) Interesting Adam Shankman on "Hairspray 2". Yeah, No Kidding (4)
(Now Magazine) Unlikely Tom Cruise says he'll have more kids with Katie Holmes, just as soon as he remembers where he put that damn turkey baster (16)
(Aint-It-Cool-News) Spiffy Ain't it Cool catches up with Bruce Campbell on tour for his new film, "My Name Is Bruce" (32)
(News.com.au) Amusing Hugh Jackman reveals his secret technique for getting girls. Surprisingly, it's not just "being Hugh Jackman" (38)
(Geno's World) Fail Diddy wants to be the next James Bond (101)
(Contact Music) Amusing Kim Cattrall looks forward to starting work on the "Sex and the City" sequel just because of the casting couch experiences. Sarah Jessica Parker, on the other hand, is entirely more stable (40)
(LA Times) Interesting Our big desire for epic films (25)
(Some Guy) Unlikely "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" returning to the big screen? Spike thinks he's getting too old for this shiat (55)
(NYPost) Dumbass Winona Ryder "loses" diamond-encrusted bracelet and ring worth over $125,000 on loan from Vulgari. Oopsie, my bad (35)
(Kotaku) Ironic Actor from video game where you shoot terrorists is in stable condition after being shot by terrorists (14)
(News.com.au) Sad Patrick Swayze says his goodbyes after learning cancer has spread to his liver (91)
(Starpulse) Interesting Kim Cattrall and Sharon Stone wanted for "Police Academy" sequel. Steve Guttenberg readily available, jogging in his bathrobe in a park nearby (20)
(Gigwise) Scary The sky is turning red, pierced from below, raining blood from a lacerated sky, awaiting the hour of reprisal, bleeding its horror: N*Sync to reunite with Justin Timberlake (36)
(Daily Mail) Amusing The next big thing? Bed hair (42)

Thu November 27, 2008
(Gizmodo) Spiffy Luke's original lightsaber for $185,000? How about Indiana Jones' hat and whip for $61,000? Or you could settle for Jor-El's tunic or a gremlin for $7000 at this really geeky auction (17)
(Daily Mail) Scary Woah...Cindy Crawford's two daughters are gonna be killer when they get older. Whaddya mean she only has one daughter? (with pic, erm, goodness) (59)
(Contact Music) Strange "Australia" actor just discovered that Jimi Hendrix died. Wait until he learns about Generalissimo Francisco Franco (23)
(I-Mockery) Amusing I-Mockery ranks the ten best things about the classic Thanksgiving movie, "Planes, Trains and Automobiles" (16)
(Now Magazine) Interesting Paris Hilton booed at birthday party after she replaces Britney Spears as headliner. Presumably Paula Abdul was unavailable (20)
(Contact Music) Asinine Billy Zane's parents give back to the community. Just kidding, they screwed med students out of their tuition fees: "Because their son was a wealthy actor, we never considered that the school would close in such a fraudulent way" (21)
(Globe and Mail) Interesting Jason Priestley credits the Persian Gulf war for helping to make "Beverly Hills, 90210" into a hit. George H. W. Bush's legacy tainted forever (32)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Fail Who would have thought a live variety show starring Rosie O'Donnell, Kathy Griffin, Rachael Ray and Alanis Morissette would have been a huge ratings flop? Oh, that's right, my eyes -- after I gouged them out (59)
(Fox News) Followup Gordon Ramsey's "Kitchen Nightmares" shelved after he cooked up a little tart (47)
(Never gonna' give) Cool Rick Astley appears in Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, ensuring the broadcast will not let you down (167)
(AccessAtlanta) Dumbass Let the trainwreck continue: Bobby and Whitney may reunite (10)
(Daily Mail) Sappy The Shat buries the hatchet with Leonard Nimoy, gives him giant bear hug after 2-hour lunch. In related news, The Shat needs to lay off the 2-hour lunches (16)
(Metro) Scary Christina Aguilera relies on Nicole Richie for motherhood advice. DOING IT WRONG (15)
(X-Entertainment) Strange Peanuts with popcorn: Recreating the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving feast (28)
(Wired) Cool Hey You Guuuuyyyys! A new Electric Company starts in January (39)
(TampaBays10.com) Followup Yippie-ki-yay, rubber lawsuit (4)
(Chud) Stupid The trilogy shall now be complete..."Three Men and A Bride" in the works. Don't worry folks, Danson, Selleck, and Guttenberg will all be back. No word yet if any ghost children will be involved (53)
(Now Magazine) Stupid Madonna hires a lifestyle guru to cleanse her house of all traces of Guy Ritchie. In related news, Guy Ritchie to purchase plenty of medicine to cleanse his body of all traces of Madonna (14)

Wed November 26, 2008
(Huffington Post) Spiffy Natalie Portman doesn't "get" celibacy, much like how submitter will never get Natalie Portman (53)
(Contact Music) Amusing Ain't no party like a Baldwin brothers Thanksgiving football party 'cause a Baldwin brothers Thanksgiving football party don't stop (11)
(Seattle Times) Strange Historic James Dean private photo archive is being torn apart in giant dispute between documentary filmmaker and designers he considered hiring for accompanying Dean book (7)
(LA Times) Cool James Callis on 'Battlestar Galactica' finale: 'You can't be disappointed. I think if Adolf Hitler were back, he'd be crying in his handkerchief." (41)
(Starpulse) Obvious Heath Ledger's death inspires a new "Law & Order" episode. Show to focus on a psychopathic comedian who murders a gay cowboy (19)
(Starpulse) Obvious Zach Braff explains that "Scrubs" will now be a funny show (71)
(ABC News) Interesting World's greatest mysteries: Where is Jimmy Hoffa? What happened to the Mayans? How does that ugly troll David Spade get such hot women? (40)
(io9) Silly Just in time for Thanksgiving, here's sci-fi's most dysfunctional families. At least you're not a Skywalker (46)
(Yahoo) Scary FINALLY - the US Senate is going to make sure that NPR starts airing conservative viewpoints (486)
(Bitten and Bound) Obvious Valentino is starting to rub off on Sarah Jessica Parker....literally. Holy face paint Batman (44)
(Some Guy) Amusing "30 Rock" has pissed off Canada. OoooooooOoooooooo (68)
(Den Of Geek) Interesting A salute to the many TV shows that fell too soon (194)
(MTV) Obvious Robert Downey Jr. on "Avengers": "If we don't get it right, it's really going to suck" (50)
(JSOnline) Sappy Widow who was married to a Neil Diamond impersonator finally gets to the meet the real Neil Diamond. "He was pointing at me and flirting with me from the stage." (26)
(Aint-It-Cool-News) Cool The new "Terminator Salvation" poster is animated. Awesome Tag needed (49)
(Some Guy) Spiffy "Smallville" episode featuring Doomsday is first one to get geeks excited since Christopher Reeve died. So naturally CW Network puts it online (47)
(io9) Amusing "Waterworld: The Musical." Needs a 'Farkin Awesome' tag (25)

Tue November 25, 2008
(Canoe) Unlikely "In five to seven years, all movies will be made in 3D." This is not a repeat from 1957 (108)
(Daily Mail) Scary InTouch Magazine reports Angelina Jolie is knocked up with another little Piloh, er, Shiloh Pitt (32)
(Stuff) Obvious Angelina Jolie says her new film "Changeling" was "harrowing to make", but probably not as harrowing as it will be to watch (35)
(io9) Interesting Is the Cloverfield monster in the new Star Trek movie? This and other questions pondered by people who can't get laid (57)
(eBay) Spiffy Stephen Colbert auctioning off his faux fur boots he wore in his Christmas Special to charity. They could be the greatest gift of all (48)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Asinine NBC announces midseason schedule and clearly knows what fans have been craving: Howie Mandel hidden-camera show  T-Shirt (57)
(Stuff) Obvious Paris Hilton is desperate to win ex-boyfriend Benji Madden back. This headline would be just as accurate with just the first four words  T-Shirt (14)
(Defamer) Ironic Quote whoredaddy Jeff Lyons defends quotewhoreson Ben Lyons against old putz Roger Ebert. Comments call Jeff a douche, Ben a sonuvadouche (32)
(Topless Robot) Amusing As god as my witness, someone thought these turkeys (of Thanksgiving TV Specials) could fly (85)
(People Magazine) Spiffy Star of "My Name is Earl" marries the mother of their bastard (49)
(San Antonio Current) Amusing Twilight review: This is what it looks like inside a 12-year-old girl's head (136)
(Crooks & Liars) Obvious Bill O'Reilly: Wasn't that Guitar Hero ad with a half naked Heidi Klum disgusting? Let's watch it 20 more times to be sure (72)
(Metro) Scary Amy Winehouse back in the hospital after "reacting badly to medication". In related news, vodak and heroin speedballs are now considered "medication" (46)
(celebrityrush.com) Obvious Apparently channeling Elvis, now Michael Jackson is living on a diet of gravy, painkillers and biscuits (34)
(Coming Soon) Spiffy New art for comic book prequel to J.J. Abrams' "Star Trek" unveiled. Jean-Luc Picard has seen it all (65)
(USA Today) Sad After 7 years, "The Shield" ends its run tonight (320)
(Some Guy) Cool Behind the scenes of 'Iron Man' through the eyes of Jeff Bridges (31)
(RBR.com) Sad Satellite radio has only two years to live (148)
(Huffington Post) Spiffy Horatio, Sans 100 Lbs (70)
(Yahoo) Interesting Paul Schrader going to India to make his next movie, saying that the US film industry is "barren", lacking in movies that stop everything dead for a long, nonsensical musical sequence (11)

Mon November 24, 2008
(Bitten and Bound) Obvious 'The Hills' media whores Heidi and Spencer eloped over the weekend. They figured they'd get more attention if they didn't tell anyone (27)
(The Sun) Weird Jungle-based reality show participant warned not to leave camp unattended, as her giant pneumatic boobies keep her from seeing potentially poisonous critters on the ground in front of her (36)
(Huffington Post) Amusing What Steven Weber is so farking thankful for. Strangely absent: "I don't have to be on Wings anymore" (76)
(Aint-It-Cool-News) Stupid Not News: Man to star in reality show. News: It's Steven Seagal. Fark: As a Louisiana deputy (20)
(DOD) Amusing Mannheim Steamroller gives away CDs to the troops. The appropriate response is: A) Haven't they suffered enough? B) Thanks, I needed a coaster C) Manheim Steamroller? Weren't they around during the Korean War? (136)
(Some Guy) Scary Hitchcock screenwriter mysteriously dies. Perhaps he knew too much (12)
(Stuff) Spiffy Blackadder cast to reunite for behind-the-scenes Christmas documentary. Let's hope there's no flaw in their cunning plan (45)
(TVGuide) Cool A copy of Battlestar's Tricia Helfer to guest-star in 'Chuck' (23)
(Aint-It-Cool-News) Asinine Subby doesn't know how they're doing it, but apparently there is going to be an I am Legend sequel, not prequel, with Will Smith (100)
(Deceiver) Scary Somebody please take up a collection for Linda Hogan. Once we've collected enough torches and pitchforks, we can storm her castle (25)
(Onion AV Club) Obvious 31 projects we're still wating for. #31: The second coming of Jesus (40)
(FILM DRUNK) Dumbass Ace Ventura Jr.? - Someone Should Go To Jail For This (166)
(Starpulse) Interesting Qatar teams up with Robert De Niro to host annual Tribeca-like film festival; explain how to pronounce name of their country (23)
(Google) Followup Michael Jackson settles with Sheik in breach of contract lawsuit. Frylock, Meatwad unavailable for comment (27)
(Deceiver) Dumbass Not that it's tough to do, but Gwyneth Paltrow keeps pissing off PETA (36)
(Maxim) Amusing 10 unsung heroes of the James Bond movies (55)
(The Sporting Blog) Asinine Michael Phelps makes shortest, most pointless cameo ever on Entourage (84)
(The History of MST3K) Spiffy On this date in 1988, "Mystery Science Theater 3000" premiered in Minneapolis. Celebrate the 20th anniversary, but repeat to yourself: "It's just a show, I should really just relax" (191)
(Den Of Geek) Interesting Eight comic book characters Hollywood is ignoring (82)
(Daily Mail) Scary Boy George goes on trial today for false imprisonment of a male prostitute and... OMG WTF HAPPENED TO BOY GEORGE? (61)
(US-101) Interesting Season premiere of "24" last night. Jack Bauer has new weapon to defend the universe; a cameraman? (63)
(Variety) Sad Fox to take away Saturday morning cartoons and use the time for infomercials. Subby weeps into his Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs (103)
(Den Of Geek) Interesting Top 5 writer's block movies (36)

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