Another Hollywood actor's life cut short by that vicious white powder; "Felicity's" Christopher Allport killed by avalanche	(17)
(Some Guy)		ABC to re-air "Lost" Season Three finale with added "Pop-Up Video" treatment	(35)
(Cinematical)		"Rambo getting an R rating shows how silly the MPAA is. The last half hour of Rambo is just people exploding. Rambo shoots you with a gun, you explode. Rambo hits you with an arrow, you explode. Rambo gives you a wedgie, you explode."	(59)
(Some Guy)		The rise of female action heroes like Buffy, Sarah Connor, and Sydney Bristow can be seen as proof of the success of feminism. w/pics	(72)
(Box Office Mojo)		Evidence of collective human stupidity reaffirmed as Meet the Spartans takes #1 at the box office	(84)
(Some Guy)		Top 20 geek movies of all time	(117)
		Russell Crowe named "Sydney ambassador", promises to do the city proud at bar fights and in hotel lobbies everywhere	(12)
		Coen brothers named best directors for 2007. Yeah, well, that's just like, your opinion man	(53)
		Go directly to jail. Do not pass GO. Do not drop the soap	(60)
(Vanity Gossip)		Is Avril Lavigne Pregnant?	(72)

(People Magazine)		Get your Aqua Net and Zubas ready. New Kids On the Block have reunited	(58)
(Some Mansquito)		Sci-Fi Channel writers & cast invite fans to move out of their parent's basements, kiss a girl & join them on the NBC strikeline this Wednesday	(30)
(Some Gamer)		Dear gamers: I'm sorry I made false statements based on biased rumors and information I pulled out of my ass. Please stop Amazon-bombing my book	(98)
		Sarah Jessica Parker dressed in a big, blue, puffy 'roid ring. And she'd like to be called "SJP" now, if you please. The Sun is there, but it isn't happy about it	(73)
		Stallone sees no harm in HGH, Rocky 6, or new Rambo movie	(47)
		Geri Halliwell visits stabbing victim in hospital. Hasn't the poor girl suffered enough already?	(21)
		Bono gives Japanese PM Yasuo Fukuda a shiny red iPod in front of Bill Gates. *awk-ward*	(28)
		Fredo ... uh .... Christian Brando is dead	(34)
		Former CEO of Chuck Norris' charity program for kids pleads guilty to stealing. He's lucky that Chuck's letting the judicial system handle this one	(21)
(Some Guy)		Sole Canadian winner of Alexander International Vocal Competition is about to go to Carnegie Hall. Oh yeah, there's a pic. Subby now loves him some opera	(38)
		The latest Hollywood biography of a retired actor will feature his experiments in modern abstract art, his battle with alcohol and cigars, his struggle with diabetes, and his illustrious cinema career. Who is subject? Cheeta the chimpanzee	(9)
		Britney Spears generates approximately $120 million for the economy, and that's including the losses to panty manufacturers	(16)
		In a stunning display of timeliness, FCC fines ABC $1.4 million for a woman's naked booty shown on NYPD Blue in 2003	(60)
		Metallica's "Some Kind Of Monster" has some competition for the status of true-life Spinal Tap	(24)
		Scarlett Johansson is in love with Obama	(38)

		Sly Stallone denies ex-girlfriend Janice Dickenson's allegations he once juiced her up on steroids: "The only thing I injected her with was my fist"	(32)
		U.S. Defense Secretary Robert Gates had no idea who Bono was when he met with him: "It's a matter of age. I thought U2 was an airplane"	(31)
		Robot Milk and Mammoth Chunks are just of the few things for sale at the "Time Travel Mart" in LA	(11)
		Isabella Rossellini debuts her horny bugs. "The puppet insects had to be quite robust or they'd fall apart when Isabella had sex with them"	(20)
		Britney Spears' paparazzo lover Adnan Ghalib's name on health website as a tester for penile enhancement creams	(8)
(TMZ)		Britney on Heath Ledger; "He's still here-no one really dies". That's what Zombie Brad Renfro told her	(20)
(Some Guy)		Eleven movies that were saved by historical inaccuracy	(52)
		By the look of the pic, Mary Kate Olsen should have played the Joker in the new Batman film	(340)
		Can an NFL player go vegan? If meat and fish are vegetables, then yes, absolutely	(53)
(Some Guy)		Sean Lennon and his girlfriend scarily morph into modern-day John and Yoko (pic)	(54)
(the age)		Will Ferrell wins James Joyce award, thanks hosts by offering "I love the taste of Guinness on the back of your throat, when it repeats on you the next morning"	(30)
		"The Dark Knight" trailer, "Halo:-style. It'll put a smile on your face, hyuaghhahahahaha	(39)
(Amazon.com)		Fox News's "Psychologist" gets owned via Amazon.com. Next book to include chapter on not "Farking with the Nerds" (Reader Reviews made up of comedy gold)	(66)
		What would family game night be without a rousing round of "Serial Killer?"	(12)
(Some Guy)		Man attempts to submit his awful show ideas to the Discovery Channel, is repeatedly shot down. Solution: Form a protest that they aren't doing enough to save the planet	(40)
		Lindsay Lohan plans to write her memoirs. Book to feature such fascinating insights as to what it was like working with Jane Fonda and what it's like to blow chunks at some of the most exclusive bars in the world	(32)
		Actual headline: "Britney Spears scares school children"	(24)
		Charlize Theron wins Hasty Pudding award. Submitter's wrist agrees	(26)
		Lie-detector TV series has hardly any viewers. Bzzzzzt	(51)
		Barry Manilow returns home to revisit the Seventies, buy a bucket of chicken	(8)
		Lead singer of UB40 quits after 30 years with the band. In other news, UB40 was still around	(36)
		Behold the latest cinematic trainwreck brought to you by Hollywood: "Teeth," a film about a girl with teeth in her vagina. Seriously	(303)
(Bitten and Bound)		Holy Moly, Rocky. Angie and Brad are adding another two rugrats to their kid posse. Time to scrap the bicycles and buy a bus	(34)
		How to use the phrase "Quantum of Solace" in a conversation	(35)
		How would you like to be Morrissey 's valet?	(57)
		Group putting up bronze statue of The Fonz in downtown Milwaukee. City's aldermen veto a Potsie mural	(58)
		Don Imus sued for $4 million by publisher for calling their ads for a book by Gerald Ford "cheesy" and saying the publisher "has been waiting for Ford to croak so they can unload these books"	(26)
(Some Guy)		Fox: We're thrilled critics hate "The Moment of Truth"	(46)
		If the WGA would have had the stones to NOT agree to an interim deal with Marvel, the public wouldn't be subjected to the forthcoming suckage that are movies about Thor, Ant-Man, The Avengers and Captain America	(53)
		Dom DeLuise hit with worst double whammy ever, penile and prostate cancer	(69)
(Some Guy)		BBC creates experiment where all women from one town leave the kids and homes in the hands of men for a week. What could possibly go wrong?	(108)
(Some Guy)		Adam Sandler says people should leave Tom Cruise alone. America breathlessly awaits to hear what Pauly Shore thinks	(54)
		Disney and Pixar to release the third installment of "Toy Story" in 2010, which will also include an additional dimension for your viewing pleasure	(39)
(Some Van Halen Guy)		"Oooh, OOOh yes, yeah ah yeah, haaaaa yeah", has never sounded better	(30)

(Some Guy)		New Rambo movie to have higher body count than any previous Rambo film, still not as high as Hot Shots Part Deux	(40)
		It's like "Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?" but with terrorists	(17)
		Lance Bass sent to the hospital after he bashed his head on a weightlifting machine. Get your mind out of the gutter	(17)
		Actress and total hottie Kate Mara is loving the New York Giants' miracle run to the Super Bowl...and why not, since she's related to basically everyone who ever owned or ran the franchise	(47)
		Drugs found in Ledger's apartment identified	(95)
		Entertainment Weekly's arbitrarily-chosen seventeen sexiest aliens in sci-fi. Yes, Worf makes the list	(107)
		Owen Wilson buys bong, writes it off as business expense	(40)
		Amy Winehouse's father tells the BBC he thinks his daughter is crackers, daft, bonkers, barmy, barking mad	(20)
		Perez Hilton awarded $85,000 from Lohan defamation lawsuit. Plans on spending it all on blue hair dye	(103)
		Newsflash: Heath Ledger edgy and anxious over Christmas holidays	(21)
(OK Magazine)		The producer of Denise Richards' new reality show is Ryan Seacrest, creating a votex of suck that will shatter the 11-dimensional brane we inhabit	(20)
		Remember John Ritter? He's back. In wrongful death lawsuit form	(29)
(The Superficial)		They tried to make me go to rehab and I said yes, yes, yes (NSFW images in sidebar)	(181)
		Yep, they're gonna make a "Hannah Montana" movie. Didn't see that one coming, err, I mean, ZOMG THT SOOO ROXX11	(31)
		John Gibson clinches the title of Douchebag of the Year 11 months ahead of schedule (w video)	(223)
		Shout Factory has secured worldwide home entertainment and digital download rights to the cult TV series "Mystery Science Theater 3000." Mitchell	(132)
		Jerry Springer the Opera sold out at the Stoner Theatre. Bonus: Jesus Christ Superstar playing on the other stage	(6)
		Jamie Lynn Spears will give her baby to her mother in order to concentrate on her career	(313)
		Cloverfield is making some people sick - and it's not because of the acting	(122)
		Video games are the source of all that is evil	(56)
		If you type "Heath Ledger is dead" into Google translate (English to Spanish) you get something... unexpected	(292)
		Alicia Keys has the second worst No. 1 album ever	(28)
		Newest fashion fad from American Apparel: Nothing but a strategically placed sock	(15)
		SCI FI channel to air 'Jericho' re-runs. Nuts	(35)
(Some Guy)		Slim Whitman sick of people confusing him with Ace Frehley	(13)
(My Fox Orlando)		Actor Wesley Snipes says things are good even though he's on trial for tax fraud	(4)
(Some Guy)		Edward Norton swears new "Hulk" movie has nothing to do with previous Ang Lee film, refers questions to Tyler Durden when he starts getting angry	(35)
		Ain't It Cool News has an early description of the Indiana Jones and the Temple of Prunes trailer that will debut on February 15th	(19)
		$20 Bill test is clean, we care because it has something to do with that Heath Ledger guy	(14)
		Jenna Fischer laughs off a rumored romance with David Spade. As she should	(31)
		Jay Leno files lawsuit over stolen jokes and wins. Your headline, stolen by Leno, then by book publisher, unavailable for comment	(13)
		Man sues Blue Man Group after he claims group members shoved an "esophagus cam" down his throat during a Chicago performance. Not that there's anything wrong with that	(135)
		New Bond film will be called "Quantum of Solace," a perfectly cromulent title	(47)
		John Travolta strives for relevance, claims he was Heath Ledger's idol	(34)
		K-Fed named "Dad of the Year" by Details Magazine. This just in...pigs have reportedly been seen flying in Los Angeles	(27)
		Sean 'Puff Daddy, Puffy, P. Diddy, Diddy' Combs is upset that Britney and Heath Ledger are getting all the press lately, so he'd like to change his name again. Submitter suggests just "P.D." for 'pathetic douchebag'	(97)
		Roger Ebert bids adieu and thumbs up as he returns to hospital for "awhile"	(56)

		When you find Heath Ledger unconscious on the floor of his apartment who do you call first? a) 911, b) Ashley Olsen, or c) Mary-Kate Olsen?	(49)
(OK Magazine)		Tony Romo, like the rest of America, is sick of Jessica Simpson	(57)
		Morgan Spurlock is a lying sack of McNuggets	(84)
		Heath Ledger update: police confirm that the official symbol for cocaine use was found in his apartment	(313)
		In the latest update on every movement by Britney Spears, she goes to court to argue for visits with her kids, but leaves without even entering the courtroom. Unconfirmed reports say she then had a cigarette and went for a cherry Slusho	(41)
		Scotland Yard probing Amy Winehouse's crack. I may have read that wrong	(152)
		Prayers for Omarion fly in at a frantic pace after Lil' Wayne is arrested	(36)
		Lindsay Lohan to publish memoir, fail miserably, show crotch in public	(27)
		Pamela Anderson says her lovers hate her wearing stilettos in bed because they don't like getting poked	(44)
		Label stands by Amy Winehouse. But not too close	(31)
(Some Guy)		Eerie interview with Heath Ledger before his death	(58)
		Madonna may still be slim and fit in the face, but please don't look at her legs. (With pic you probably shouldn't look at)	(45)
		Hayden Christensen was terrified to have fake sex with Jessica Alba	(98)
		"A gorgeous, husky-voiced supermodel greeting me with the words "Sorry for being topless" will go down in memory as the greatest celebrity introduction of my journalistic career." (Not safe for work pic in article)	(96)
		Academy Award nominations tend to go to performers in dramas, who are female, who have been nominated in the past and who command a high rank in the movie-credit pecking order. In other words, attention whores	(32)
(DailyMail)		Sarah Michelle Gellar finally gets nude for photo shoot. Expect Vaseline sales to skyrocket	(66)
		Heath Ledger's autopsy results inconclusive. In other words, that dude was high, man	(68)
		Jennifer Anniston goes out in public in thin shirt in cold weather. The Sun is there. (SFW)	(92)
		"No matter how heavily my therapist sighs every time I bring up my love of Shania Twain and banana sandwiches and 'Battlestar Galactica' collectibles, I am not nearly as insane as Tom Cruise"	(40)
(Some Guy)		Westboro Baptist Church to picket funeral of Heath Ledger, because apparently God hates The Joker now too	(538)
		Heath Ledger once filmed himself "committing suicide" in an eerie tribute video to British songwriter Nick Drake, who killed himself in 1974	(157)
(Some Guy)		In the midst of talk of recessions and housing bubbles, an important financial question is asked: Is Britney Spears good for the economy?	(15)
		10 other actors who died in their 20's	(76)
		45 .... Demi Moore is still a knockout. (Borderline not safe for work)	(7)
(phillyBurbs.com)		"Keith Ledger" is #2 search on Google. Your dog wants steak	(68)

(YTMND.com)		Radio host pwn3d by Gordon Freeman live on the air. Hilarious for nerds, nobody else	(48)
		Seven dreams involving "Super Nanny" Jo Frost	(25)
		MPAA: Hey, that study we did that says that 44% of illegal downloading is done from colleges, the one we used to justify tighter copyright laws? Yeah, it's actually more like 15%	(38)
(Some Disappointed Guy)		Awesome: Black Canary coming to Smallville. Negative Awesome: She's fugly and lookin a little too butch	(57)
		SG-1? Check. Star Trek? Check. Star Wars? Check. Yep. This is a valid top ten list of hot science fiction babes	(143)
		Chong rips Cheech (again), sez: "He's so straight I have to check him for a wire every time I talk to him."	(62)
		Ringo walks off Regis and Kelly when told to cut his song short. Nobody wanted to hear his new stuff anyway	(54)
		Penelope Cruz misplaces digital camera with "a variety of private images." Submitter will be in his bunk	(42)
(Cat on a Hot Tin Roof)		Clair Huxtable on discipline. Bonus: Priceless James Earl Jones face about 20 seconds in	(35)
(Variety)		Hasbro to release action figure of the "Cloverfield" monster. Toy will be sealed in a box you can't open with only small gaps to look into	(71)
(Some Calculator Guy)		"Today" hosts carpool to work to offset "Ends of the Earth" series carbon footprint. Fark: They'll need to carpool every work day until mid-2016	(14)
(Some Guy)		Bobby Brown arrested for cocaine possession. No, the Fark servers didn't crash and bring up headlines from 2001	(11)
(Variety)		Latest idiotic reality show: "The World's Strongest Celebrity." Oh, crap, it's gonna be Carrot Top, you just know it	(38)
(Gerry Canavan)		It's not just "Cloverfield." This photo gallery shows that in science fiction, the Statue of Liberty gets taken out a lot	(122)
		"Does Posh Spice deserve the 'worst dressed' title?" More importantly, do we deserve a society where this is a question people care about?	(20)
		Britney Spears blah blah blah, it doesn't matter what I put here it'll get greenlit five times because it has her name in it. PENISGARGLE FLAMNIG URETHRA SWOOPDIVE WHEEEE	(107)
		Simon Cowell has changed his mind about who will inherit his $200 million fortune when he dies, and boy is his dog pissed. Simon Cowell trifecta now in play	(10)
		Simon Cowell says Britney Spears knows exactly what she's doing and is manipulating the media. But he couldn't call out the four fake contestants on "American Idol" last week	(16)
		Old and busted: Dakota Fanning. New hotness: Nine-year-old younger sister Elle Fanning	(46)
		Kathleen Turner not a fan of pretty much every leading man she's ever worked with	(68)
(Bitten and Bound)		Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards are going back in the ring. This time Richards is trying to exploit her children	(23)
		Seven lighthearted tales of superpowers, cavemen and fire-breathers will cost Budweiser $2.7 million each during the Superbowl	(88)
		Amy Winehouse smoking a crack pipe. The Sun is there	(440)
		The best Super Bowl ads are when the economy is thriving and the worst when the economy is tanking. An all Billy Mays, head-on, erectile dysfunction Super Bowl in three... two... one...	(22)
		"There Will Be Blood" and "No Country for Old Men" lead Oscar nominations with eight each	(193)
		Writers' strike causing more Americans bored with TV to read more books, go to sleep earlier. Didn't the last season of "24" already do that?	(56)
(Some Guy)		Nicole Kidman saved placenta for Tom Cruise -- to prove paternity, not for him to eat	(21)

		British author JG Ballard writes his autobiography. Unfortunately, it's because he's dying of cancer	(23)
(Some Guy)		Miss America says, "I'm, like, so sad to, like, hand over my crown this weekend. It's a total bummer"	(20)
(Some Guy)		"Star Trek" teaser trailer is officially launched online. Boldly go	(154)
		Five facts on the new "Star Trek" movie and no the Cloverfield monster is NOT making a cameo	(51)
		Kiefer Sutherland released from jail a few hours early, just in time to hit the bar before last call	(27)
(Some Guy)		Paparazzi caught on film trying to snag an upskirt pic of Jessica Alba. Stay classy guys	(51)
		Want to experience how it feels to have the Paparazzi follow you everywhere? Now you can, and all it will cost you is a lot of money	(14)
		Meet the stripper grannies, the oldest of which is 74 (with pics and probably a nightmare or two)	(171)
		Harvard names crabshack Paris Hilton its "Woman of the Year"	(20)
(TMZ)		Britney back with paparazzo boyfriend again. A new one	(27)
		Eddie Murphy gets nominated for four separate Razzie acting awards this year for Norbit. "We decided that each of his characters was so offensive that he deserved individual nominations."	(27)
(CinCity2000)		An advanced look at the Wachowski Brothers' latest movie reveals something you probably already knew, though you didn't want to admit: Speed Racer is going to suck	(76)
(Vote For The Worst)		In a vain attempt to avoid the spectre of Sanjaya II, "American Idol" is stacking Season 7 with a dazzling collection of milquetoast singers who have already had their big break ... and blown it	(31)
		Britney dumps her paparazzi boyfriend following the shocking news that he sold photographs of her. Obvious and Dumbass tags fight it out	(28)
		Jessica Simpson now wants Tony Romo to sing a duet with her on her new country album, even though Romo's actually much better at singing the blues	(32)
(Bitten and Bound)		Victoria Beckham recently posed for Marc Jacobs new Spring ad campaign. She's a dead ringer for Tinky Winky	(20)
		U2 3D in UT	(47)
		Funeral attendees find out actor who'd claimed to be a "Lollipop Guild" membe