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Last night I dreamed that fark.com was turning into a software archive. After that my peaceful sleep was turned into a nightmare that I couldn't escape.

Hey Farkians...

Damn you guys kick ass. So much stuff every friggin day. Are you by any chance ninjas?

Jeff is, the rest us are gainfully employed. Actually that's not true, Jeff is gainfully employed and a ninja.

I have to say. I'm thinking about what Obscure Store does. And what Julienne does. And I'm thinking about what Ribbit or This is News does. And I gotta say, I think you folks just may take the cake...Really, nice job.

I've been enjoying yr stuff and I just thought I'd drop you a note or is that send you a line, anyway, just wanted to let you know that I think you folks kick much ass.

I especially like the "press" section you've posted on yr site. Are you mercenary ninjas? Is there a ninja union or trade association?

Jeff is pretty much the only ninja here. He says ninjas operate more like multi-level marketting scams.

Anyway. Here's a nice piece of ass:

(Hyperlink to ass deleted, find your own porn)

I think its a nice piece of ass anyway. I only watched it once or twice and I don't really remember, but I kept the link cause I thought it was kind of funny in an ass-centric kind of way.

Regrets plenty,

Fred

metascene

Thanks Fred!

BALKANS CHRONOLOGY Volume I, Issue 16: 31 August - 6 September 1998 Executive Summary

Another Ethnic Albanian Military Force Emerges to Potentially Confront the KLA

In a development that could hamper the armed independence movement in Kosovo, a second guerrilla army rivaling the KLA has sprung up with a base in northern Albania.

Like the KLA, the three-month-old group, known as the Armed Forces of the Republic of Kosovo (FARK), advocates independence for the southern Serbian province of Kosovo. But it has an antagonistic relationship with the much larger KLA, and its very existence could trigger a greater split in the already-divided ethnic Albanian community.

According to an American official, the emergence of FARK is an indication that "the KLA itself and its legitimacy are coming under question."

Friction between the armed groups is substantial. The KLA coordinating officer in the Tropoje District of northern Albania, who gave the nom de guerre "The Blind One," called FARK "cowards" and "traitors."

The existence of FARK was confirmed by the KLA, American officials, and international observers in Albania. But efforts this week to reach its mountain base were made impossible by heavy rains that rendered the dirt roads impassable.

A KLA soldier who tried to lead journalists to FARK was visibly frightened when stopped by a four-wheel-drive truck coming from the direction of the FARK base. "I'm not sure who these guys are," the soldier said.. "But I know they're not with us."

According to KLA sources, FARK largely comprises former Yugoslav Army officers who are dissatisfied with the KLA's system. Of an estimated 100 FARK members, half are fighting in Kosovo and half are training across the border in northern Albania.

FARK is aligned with Bujar Bukoshi, prime minister in exile of Kosovo's parallel government. Mr. Bukoshi, based in Germany, is responsible for raising funds from abroad that finance the parallel ethnic Albanian government. His relations with the KLA have been strained from the outset. Now, US officials say, he appears to be funding FARK.

The existence of two ethnic Albanian armies also presents difficulties on the ground in Kosovo. If FARK grows, it will become impossible to determine who is responsible for military actions. FARK forces sometimes wear uniforms identical to the KLA, complete with KLA insignias.

"One of the questions will be how effective is [FARK] as a military organization," says the American official. "How well equipped is it? How well trained is it? Can it kill Serbs? If it can do that, then I think it can be a formidable rival to the KLA."

The KLA coordinator in northern Albania directed strong warnings toward FARK and raised the possibility of an intraethnic Albanian conflict. He said, "In my opinion, they are sympathetic with the Serbs. And, if that is the case, we will not hesitate to fight with them, too."

From: Andrew

Hi Drew,

After reading fark.com for at least a month, I just read your FAQ. I laughed my ass off. You write some funny stuff.

The reason I am writing you today is that two events happened that seemed to indicate a divine purpose behind FARK:

First, on the news tonight, I heard that there's a rebel/terrorist group called "Fark". They actually kidnapped a few people, holding them for ransom to raise some money. I'm not sure of the spelling.

Second, I was reading fark.com during class today. You can tell your readers that it's a healthy endevour. Not only did a strange woman approach me and start up a conversation (fark.com works better than any pickup line?), but she explained to me that fark is Newfoundland slang for "crotch". I thought you'd appreciate that. It fits with your squirrel picture.

That's all I have to say. I think that this note is probably less than 0.1% of the text on your page, but feel free to offer me 0.1% of that $4B when you go public.

Cheers, Andrew