How bad is the John Edwards sex scandal? "Eliot Spitzer looks like a Boy Scout in comparison."	(12)
		"You have been sentenced to die by lethal injection. Do you have any final words?" "Vote Obama"	(15)
		A comparison of waffles and pancakes by your friend Karl Rove	(46)
		Congress opens hearings over military's "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy. Opponents and supporters of the policy vow to wrestle in oil while dressed in loincloths	(114)
		That cushy government job is sure looking a lot less appealing with Arnold's plans to cut pay to federal minimum wage for 200,000 workers, which happens to be $1.45 less than the California minimum wage	(26)
		German Chancellor Angela Merkel says Obama is "well-equipped -- physically", assuming what she's heard about his people is twue	(43)
		President Bush has used the word "awesome" to describe everything from dead soldiers to the Pope	(35)

		Barack Obama is against genocide. Somehow, this is a flipflop according to McCain	(77)
		McCain "oil drilling is safe" photo-op cancelled because of oil spill	(31)
		McCain: The surge started before more troops were sent to Iraq. Everyone else: WTF?	(119)
		Congressional staffers find Weiner is hard to handle	(13)
(Donklephant.com)		"I had the courage and the judgment to say I would rather lose a political campaign than lose a war. It seems to me that Obama would rather lose a war in order to win a political campaign"	(248)
(Broward)		Congressman Robert Wexler (D-Florida Tag) actually lives with his family in Maryland. His Florida address is in a restricted "over 55" community that doesn't allow children. He's only 47 and has three kids	(76)
(Some Communist)		Old and busted: Arms race with Russia over nuclear weapons. New hotness: Arms race with combat lasers. Fark: Russia claims they've had said technology since 1972	(35)
		Barack Obama to Angela Merkel: "Send more German troops to Afghanistan." Angela Merkel to Barack Obama: "Nein." Barack Obama to Angela Merkel: "We're gonna need a few more than that"	(86)
		Jealous of Obama's press coverage, McCain plans to a helicopter flight to an offshore oil rig in the Gulf of Mexico during Hurricane Dolly. Yeah, that's right, he wanted to fly a helicopter into a hurricane for a photo op	(68)
		The people behind HillaryIs44 finally out themselves	(112)
		Not news: Blog warns of Obama becoming "just another polical hack." News: It's The Huffington Post	(50)
		The dogged newshounds at the Poltico uncover evidence that the real motive behind Obama's world tour is to help him win the election	(21)
(Some Guy)		Noted political scientist and American electoral college scholar George Michael gives political advice to Barack Obama	(28)
		McCain (somehow keeping a straight face): The recent drop in the price of oil has to do with Bush lifting the ban on offshore drilling	(129)
		McCain may have just doomed his campaign by committing the worst sin possible in American politics: Carrying himself in a manner that displeases Washington's entrenched, elderly punditocracy	(137)
		In yet another chapter of the War On Science, the Bush Administration tried to get the EPA to change its definition of CO2 to help big-business polluters escape regulation	(269)
(Third Party Watch)		New Zogby poll has Bob Barr polling at eight percent, with the difference between Obama and McCain at two percent, in Colorado. Won't you be, won't you be, won't you be my Nader?	(134)
		A Republican pundit comes clean: The best thing about McCain's possible VP choice Bobby Jindal is that he's not white. The fact that he's an exorcist and supports the teaching of intelligent design is just gravy	(302)
		Dubya's take on the mortgage crisis? "Wall Street got drunk"	(69)
		Vote your 401(k) so you don't end up eating generic beans on the street: Elect John McCain and help the stock market	(175)
		"Obama is the Mr. Tumnus of American politics, the gentle forest faun of Narnia, with throngs of reporters trembling to sit with him at tea and cakes"	(156)
(Some Car Guy)		Obama pledges $4 billion to help Detroit and the economy because American automakers couldn't see $5-per-gallon gas coming and kept churning out V8s	(118)
		Barack Obama photographed wearing traditional Jewish garb. EVERYBODY PANIC	(192)
		From the article: "Even Fox News broke away from Mr. McCain midevent to cover the rescue of a bear cub wounded in a California fire and nicknamed Lil' Smokey"	(59)
		McCain campaign gets confused and puts out a fantastic ad for Obama	(96)
		CBS gets caught editing video of McCain to remove an incorrect answer and replace it with a different one	(125)
		Obama channels Yogi Berra: "You know, it's always a bad practice to say 'always' or 'never'"	(71)
		Your daily allowance of liberal political schadenfreude: The Alaska GOP is eating itself alive	(81)

(Enquirer)		John Edwards visits mistress Rielle Hufartidyall and their lovechild at Los Angeles hotel. It's in the Enquirer, so it must be true	(83)
		McCain may pick a running mate soon. Choices include Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal, Florida Gov. Charlie Crist and Mrs. Butterworth	(315)
		"Wall Street was drunk. That's why I asked you to turn off the cameras" President Bush at 0:39. EVERYBODY FACEPALM	(141)
		McCain lops 99 years off his "troops might be in Iraq 100 years" comment and says he'll pull troops out in as little as a year. Beat that, Obama	(130)
(thehotjoints.com)		"Tar Baby": John Kerry Uses Racist Term To Describe Attacks On Obama	(103)
		Plane carrying Ron Paul goes into a steep Ron Paul and has to make an emergency Ron Paul	(304)
		"The Daily Show" reporters talk about the media's love for Obama and their Oboners	(83)
		Barack Obama is so good at diplomacy, he got King Abdullah of Jordan to drive him to the airport. The motherfarking king of a country	(100)
		How will McCain deal with Obama being in the spotlight all week? Easy, pick a "bold choice" for veep. Get your "McCain/Carrot Top" campaign signs ready, folks	(75)
(Democracy Now)		Obama advisor explains why Obama's voting for a massive increase in government spying and telecomm immunity "improves civil liberties"	(120)
		Obama says Iraq needs a "political solution." Said solution may require "military intelligence," possibly acquired while snacking on "jumbo shrimp"	(83)
		If Obama wins, that's bad news for black Americans, because then white folks can say that they are not racist, thus getting them off the hook for slavery, stealing from old blues musicians and making Wayne Brady popular	(283)
		Rep. Bachmann (R-Nvrlnd) says oil drilling will reduce gas prices to $2.00/gallon because it would produce enough energy to send her starship back in time to collect oil from Earth's past when it was plentiful	(158)
		NY Times rejected McCain's op-ed piece because of its well known liberal bias. Pay no attention to the fact that it rejected numerous pieces by Bill Clinton while he was sitting president of the United States	(366)
		"Taking their cue from America's Obamaniacs, Europeans see the Illinois senator as a healer bringing absolution for the Republic's original sin of racism"	(155)
(Some Guy)		Fourth-century Bible neglects to resurrect Jesus, an oversight that was corrected in later versions	(1547)
		New Obama scandal: "Fake" interviews	(π)
(Some Guy)		The one reporter not covering Obama was in NH to greet McCain	(101)
		Obama campaign bans the wearing of green clothes. Apparently, he isn't as Irish as we thought	(116)
		John McCain and Barack Obama's first joint general-election campaign appearance	(55)
(Some Guy)		Why is election day on Tuesday?	(77)
		Social Security unveils new benefits calculator: 1) Enter your social security number. 2) Click "estimate." 3) See total benefits of $0	(95)
		People are already arguing over the political implications of Batman's cell-phone sonar system in "The Dark Knight." (Warning: Spoiler discussion in thread)	(165)

(Donklephant.com)		John McCain's new ad blames rising fuel prices on opposition to oil drilling, but if we canceled the ban on offshore drilling today, we wouldn't be able to add any additional oil/gasoline to market until 2030	(230)
		People shocked SHOCKED that the liberal media is paying more attention to Obama than McCain	(189)
		Libertarian Presidential candidate Bob Barr may make Georgia a surprising new electoral battleground	(185)
		Bloggers upset about not being included in city press releases. Threaten to go home and blog about it	(18)
(Martin Eisenstadt)		McCain adviser links Obama to terrorism because his daughters are fans of the keffiyeh-wearing Jonas Brothers	(108)
		Keeping in line with "no liberal bias", the non-partisan New York Times refuses to publish McCain Op-Ed piece. One week after they generously publish Obama manifesto. "Pancakes"	(315)
		"Has there ever been a presidential nominee with a wider gap between his estimation of himself and the sum total of his lifetime achievements?"	(174)
		Clearly without partisan motives, the night before Obama flew to the Middle East, Condi issued a directive barring embassy support for political candidates	(116)
		Obama's personal 757 airliner sports "rising sun" logo on tail, still magically able to land amid U.S. military	(246)
		"...how efficiently certain views that deviate from the elite consensus are banished from sight -- simply prohibited -- even when those views are held by the vast majority of citizens."	(76)
		Inside Obama's June fundraising numbers: $29 million raised from June 1 to June 29, $25 million raised on June 30?	(50)
		Nevada GOP holds conference call instead of convention due to lack of interest	(18)
(Some Guy)		Obama charms the pants off of Lara Logan -- but then again, who hasn't?	(37)
		Reporters finally get something they can understand about Obama's trip: A gaffe. Except it's McCain, talking about the "Iraq-Pakistan border"	(223)
		McCain challenges Obama to admit he was wrong about the Surge. Obama triple-dog dares McCain to stick his tongue on a cold flagpole	(134)
		Iraqis like Obama, except for his plans to hand their country over to terrorists and all	(40)
		Poll shows half of Americans think the media are so smitten with that dreamy Barack Obama that they'll help him win. Only 24 percent of respondents think the media are unbiased, but, of course, they are insane	(37)
		Legal activists dream of a "true liberal" on the Supreme Court, but it's not clear if Barbra Streisand and Noam Chomsky are eligible for the post	(83)
		Citing Hollywood's liberal bias, Breitbart calls for "an affirmative-action program that can put Republicans to work in the entertainment industry"	(175)
		Fired GOP U.S. attorney: Rove skipped testimony to avoid indictment	(112)
		"Attention everybody. Every magazine that wants a writer on Barack Obama's campaign plane step forward. Where you going, The New Yorker? By the way, nice cover last week"	(269)
		RON PAUL warned you this would happen, you should have listened to RON PAUL. RON PAUL RON PAUL RON PAUL. Penis	(96)
		Al Gore would never resort to half-truths, hyperbole, hysterical fearmongering or shrill rhetoric. So when he says offshore drilling is just like invading Iraq, he must be on to some new inconvenient truth	(90)
		Jon and the Social Security predicament	(121)
		Spiegel release the full Nuri al-Maliki interview transcipt. Seems like he was 'misunderstood and mistranslated' in three answers where he supported Obama's position	(200)
		UK will allow "idiots and lunatics" to hold elected office, because this has worked out so well with those ex-colonials across the pond	(28)
		Fun gaff: At 23 seconds into video, Obama refers to "the bomb" that fell on Pearl Harbor. You remember that bomb	(175)
		"If Europeans really want to help Barack Obama next week, they should repress their enthusiasm for him -- and stay home"	(242)
		The reason the late night shows aren't poking fun at Obama isn't because they support him, it's because he's just not funny	(129)
		Who says that the Christian right hasn't warmed up to McCain? "I never thought I would hear myself saying this... while I am not endorsing Senator John McCain, the possibility is there that I might"	(55)
		German authorities preparing for possibility of over one million people gathering to hear charismatic leader speak in Berlin	(65)
		Condoleezza Rice knows whO she's BAcking in the caMpaign but won't sAy	(108)

		Lynwood, Illinois passes an ordinance that would levy $25 fines against anyone showing three inches or more of their underwear in public	(252)
		That "clarification" about Iraqi Prime Minister Maliki's support for troop withdrawal came from Centcom, not the Iraqi government	(304)
		Obama holds Gallup poll lead so McCain should just quit now	(128)
		Congress to torpedo funding for the DDG 1000 destroyer program after only two ships	(65)
		The November election isn't about Obama vs. McCain, or even Obama vs. Pancakes - it's about Obama vs. Obama (by Willie Brown)	(36)
		Senator Lamar Alexander (Romero-TN) discovers key to lowering gas prices: "find more, use less." Yes sirree, these are the people we elected to run our country	(40)
		A look at the technology upgrades being performed at the Pepsi Center for the Democratic convention. Network will have capacity to run phone and Internet service to the equivalent of 220,000 homes, 100,000 if Bill is downloading his porn	(27)
		Caption what Obama is saying to the troops	(254)
		Nice try, Obamaniacs, but Iraq's leader doesn't actually support withdrawal	(lots)
		Congress answers to high gas prices... a ten-cent gas tax increase	(364)
(Ynet)		Israel warns Obama against an Iraqi troop withdrawal, prefering more of a slow, sensual approach and a follow up cuddle	(96)
		South Carolina lawmaker sees no problem with parking his vehicle in the fire lane for his convenience, doesn't even attempt damage control when caught. "Every person in the country does it"	(28)

		After sending out a memo giving state workers way to conserve fuel when travelling, Kentucky Gov. Steve Beshear uses three planes to fly to a town hall meeting in Pikeville, about 165 miles away from Frankfort	(41)
		McCain campaign responds to Maliki's endorsement of Obama's plan. "We're Farked"	(251)
		George Bush makes little girl cry at T-ball game. Hey, there's no crying in T-ball (w/video)	(26)
		US Air Force installing Weighted Companion Cubes on aircraft shuttling top military leaders, despite Congress telling them not to -- twice	(205)
		On the 15th anniversary of Don't Ask, Don't Tell, 75% of Americans think letting gays serve openly in the military is a fabulous idea	(70)
		Remember that time Bush landed on a carrier and stood in front of a "Mission Accomplished" banner? Looking back on it, the whole incident was symbolic of how mean the left is toward our president	(128)
		The Washington Post's ombudsman thinks there should be more substantive political coverage. But where would readers learn such devastatingly relevant info as Chandra Levy's favorite scrunchy color?	(14)
		McCain: "I challenge Obama to visit Iraq." Obama: "All right then, I'm going." McCain: Obama's Iraq trip is "politically motivated." You stay classy, GOP	(96)
		In a move Paterson will never see coming, Giuliani may run for governor of New York	(43)
		Barack Obama's sloganeering has hit rock bottom: "Beliefs we can believe in." How about "Hot air we can breathe in" (pic)	(183)
		Iraqi PM backs Obama exit plan. Republicans demand he visit Iraq	(113)
(Some xkcd Guy)		Running for office. xkcd style	(211)
		Something new for the media to go into hysterics about: ABC sees subliminal messages in McCain ad	(118)
		U.S. negotiating with Iraq over timetable -- correction: "time horizon" -- for our depature	(72)
(Some Speaker of the House)		Bush administration attempts to redefine the term "abortion" so that it includes oral contraception. They're apparently unclear on how putting it in her mouth prevents babies from happening	(123)
		Columnist writes about how Americans don't know what irony is, manages to define irony incorrectly. Fark Irony Police, time to do your thing	(231)

		Gramm quits McPancakes campaign. What a whiner	(432)
		Today is the 39th anniversary of the Chappaquiddick incident. Nothing to see here, move along	(135)
		How to make fun of Barack Obama, by Joel Stein, a columnist who wouldn't know humor if it was giving him a Dutch rudder	(62)
		If you're going to put an "independent" government reform proposal on the ballot, don't post online the Powerpoint admitting it's to secure Democratic control of the state	(46)
		O'Reilly says the pill should not be covered by insurance, but Viagra should because it treats a 'medical condition.' Specifically, the medical need to rub middle eastern foods on your employees while they shower	(135)
		Republicans win eighth straight Congressional Baseball game, secure home-field advantage in fall elections	(32)
		How well do you know the news? (Pew Research Center Quiz)	(199)
		McCain spokesman Col. Bud Day says that under President McCain, we'll never "kneel" to "the Muslims." Sure, he just smeared an entire religion, but he's a war hero, so we'll let it slide	(168)
		McCain speaks to real blue collar GM line workers, by going to GM's Technology Center where you have to have at least a doctorate to walk in the door	(50)
		Police use undercover agents to successfully infiltrate and spy on domestic networks. Of anti-death penalty protestors	(137)
		Barack Obama refuses to release the names, addresses, and phone numbers of all of his former law clients even though major conservative blogs are demanding this sensitive information be given to them	(229)
		Even after fourteen months of primaries and early campaigning, nearly half of all independent voters still can't decide between Changey McChange and Jowly McGrump	(122)
		NRO on McCain's strengths: "His name sounds like John McClain, the action hero played by Bruce Willis in the manly Die Hard series. Barack Obama sounds like the kind of elitist villain John McClain has to outwit and defeat."	(122)
(Gay Patriot)		John McCain regularly meets with gay Republicans, but never puts those meetings on his official schedule. Not that there's anything wrong with that	(69)
		The Military has spent $16 million of anti-terror funds designing Comfort Capsules, areas on planes with leather seats for Generals. After Congress told them twice they will never be allowed to actually put them in any planes	(131)
		McCain's backers less fired up than Obama's, but in their defense, it's hard to schedule a campaign around "Matlock" and pancake breakfasts	(9)
		Obama travels to foreign lands and is followed by an entourage of fawning network news anchors. McCain takes three similar trips, not a single anchor. Media bias FTW	(lots)
(Some Guy)		Los Angeles mayor strongly disagrees with reports that over 25 percent of LA's students drop out. He wants recognition that it's closer to half	(74)
		McCain: "my opponent has only attended ONE hearing on Afghanistan." Reporters: "Hey McCain, it turns out you haven't been to ANY hearings on the matter in two years." D'OH	(67)
		Owner of the "Laugh Factory" wants Jesse Jackson to pay a fine for using the N-word	(319)
		San Francisco ballot measure to name sewage plant after President Bush certified for November ballot	(446)
		Savage: 'In 99 percent of the cases' of autism, 'it's a brat who hasn't been told to cut the act out.'	(267)