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Fark.com's  Political Inclination Thermometric Analyzer:
3.39% Commie 6.37% Commie
These links may be stale and generate errors. Can't do much about it. Tastes like chicken.

(Headline T-Shirts are still available for archive links.)
Sun March 15, 2009
(Telegraph) Silly Having solved all other problems, the European Parliament bans "Miss", "Mrs", and many other forms of address deemed sexist to women, to avoid upsetting the sensitive broads (79)
(YouTube) Dumbass Conservative Tucker Carlson rips Jon Stewart on CNN (320)
(New York Daily News) Interesting Honeymoon shortened by that "I" word (164)
(Daily Mail) Followup "Maria Sergeyeva, who dreams of leading Russia, 'finds adventures' while drunk and wearing nothing but a Cuban flag". Sorry Americans, you're stuck with Pelosi and Hilldog (84)
(Think Progress) Obvious Dick Cheney on whether he ruined America: "Stuff happens. Me, for instance" (118)
(Yahoo) Obvious In Northern Ireland, a group of 300 vow to fight a much larger force. Zack Snyder set to direct (43)
(Washington Post) Amusing McCain six months ago: Tax health benefits. Obama then: What are you smoking? Obama today: Tax health benefits (140)
(Media Matters) Stupid Problem: You work for the Washington Post so you have to regretfully bemoan the failure of the Obama Administration, but he hasn't failed at anything yet. Solution: Make stuff up (96)
(Yahoo) Followup Democratic official says "We have exhausted the use of Rush as an attention-getter" to the point where not even the drum solo from YYZ will get a rise out of voters (203)
(ABC News) Obvious In an attempt to stay relevant, Bin Laden releases new tape, breaks up with Jennifer Aniston (232)
(Google) Followup Beijing sends patrol ship to South China Sea. U.S. says it doesn't want to deal with that junk (52)
(WRAL) Asinine Judge orders women to stop homeschooling her children, despite them testing 2 years above their grade level. The reason? Her "teaching is strictly out of the Bible" (572)
(ABC News) Obvious Fifth grader in Oregon banned from wearing Obama mask in school talent show. This is bad news - for Obama impersonators (19)
(MSNBC) Amusing McCain 6 months ago: US economy is sound. Obama 6 months ago: What are you smoking? Obama today: US economy is sound (248)
(Daily Kos) Sad 10 Republican congressmen vote against creamy, delicious, pi (88)

Sat March 14, 2009
(National Post) Hero "Foreign military and political leaders who fear public displays of honour and respect for the fallen should stand in the winter winds on an overpass in Ontario. When it comes to honouring its military, the world needs more Canada" (108)
(Washington Post) Silly Republicans: "Obama's failing"...Obama: "I inherited a shiatpile from Bushco, it'll take time to fix"...Republicans: "OMG you're being partisan" (234)
(yomiuri.co.jp) Scary North Korea notifies International Maritime Organization that it's launching, ermm, "satellites" across Japan and that two sections of nearby ocean should be considered danger zones for, uhmm, "debris" (37)
(Talking Points Memo) Amusing Come for the steamy transcripts of Kwame Kilpatrick's sex texts. Stay for the humourous juxtapositions of photographs (54)
(Talking Points Memo) Silly GOP congressman introduces bill to require birth certificates for presidential candidates. Boy, talk about closing the barn door after the Kenyan is in the White House (120)
(Crooks & Liars) Dumbass Norm Coleman posts donor data in unprotected file online, then blames hackers for exposing it (75)
(CNN) Scary Russia to use Cuban airbases. No, this is not a repeat from 1962 (311)
(Washington Post) Interesting Obama's new Interior Secretary may get thrown to wolves he's decided don't need protection (77)
(Google) Misc Sri Lanka rejects war crime allegations, vows to pursue rebel enclaves "until every last one is destroyed, then we'll PULL THE STILL BEATING HEARTS FROM THEIR LIVING BODIES AND oh crap this microphone is still on, isn't it?" (22)
(Globe and Mail) Dumbass Prime Minister Sweatervest of Canada bashes Obama's policies and Wall Street in "behind closed-doors" speech that just happened to be "taped". This foot tastes delicious, eh (46)
(Some Guy) Obvious Obama's agenda may prove too much for Congress, which is much more accustomed to sitting on its collective lazy ass and doing jack shiat all day (134)
(ABC News) Amusing "Mr. Vice President?" "Gimme a f*&$#ing break," he said, apparently unaware that the microphone was on (174)
(AJC) Dumbass Georgia governor emphasizes he would oppose stem cell research, indoor plumbing, dentistry, fancy book learnin' (113)

Fri March 13, 2009
(Some Guy) Florida State senator freaks out about the phrase "animal husbandry" during discussion of a bestiality law. Nobody mention Wednesday is humpday (98)
(CNN) Sad Good: 14-year-old eighth-grader writes Congress for stimulus money to repair her dilapidated school. Better: Congress gives SC the money to fix it. Typical: GOP governor turns it down (342)
(Crooks & Liars) Asinine Glenn Beck thinks liberals are responsible for people going on shooting sprees. Luckily, Bill O'Reilly is there to act as a rational voice..wait, what? (214)
(Huffington Post) Obvious Laura Ingraham debates Meghan McCain in an adult and mature manner. Just kidding, she makes a plus-size model joke (121)
(Reuters) Interesting Obama administration drops term "enemy combatant" for detainees held at Guantanamo Bay, will now be known as "friends you haven't met yet" (582)
(Time) Cool TIME asks: Can marijuana help rescue California's economy... or something... man, I could really go for some burritos (598)
(Forbes) Unlikely Obama last week: Crisis crisis crisis. Obama this week: what the hell is wrong with you people? Everything is fine (507)
(Kingston Daily Freeman) Interesting Clintons consider buying home in Woodstock after Hillary vetoes Bill's choice of Coxsackie (40)
(Lileks Screedblog) Amusing Defense attorney for traitor John Walker Lindh going to work for the Obama administration. What, was Pol Pot's au pair not available? (154)
(Yahoo) Interesting Only one state recorded a drop in its unemployment rate. This same state is the one governed by an Indian-American governor who has been ridiculed by the media (144)
(NCSE) Fail Newly introduced bill in Texas would exempt private education facilities from being certified degree-granting institutions, effectively allowing the Institute for Creation Research to print diplomas until they ran out of ink (148)
(AP) Obvious With the economy in the tank and millions unemployed, Nancy Pelosi just can't bring herself to cut congressional cost of living increases (121)
(MSNBC) Followup Keith Olbermann's take on the Rush Limbaugh billboard. Bonus: He gives a nod to the Fark caption thread, with sample Farker suggestions (LGT video) (167)
(Huffington Post) Amusing Rush Limbaugh accuses Andrea Mitchell of being Barney Frank's "butt boy", because if anyone knows how to identify a butt boy, it's Rush Limbaugh (116)

Thu March 12, 2009
(Think Progress) Unlikely Rick Santorum: I believe the fundamentals of the economy are strong. I also believe I am doing a great job as a Senator and my name is not a slang word. It's 1997 right? (101)
(Statesman) Asinine Governor Rick Perry (R-etard Texas) says he'll block $550 million for expanded unemployment benefits from the stimulus plan. I mean, get a job people, amiright? (475)
(BBC) PSA "Chocolate has lost its status as a special treat and I think that if we charged a tax on it then, over a number of years, we could restore that status" (77)
(Yahoo) Asinine So, just to get this straight: Recruiting is so bad that the Army has had to lower its standards to allow felons, borderline retards and the elderly to serve; but they are STILL firing soldiers just for being gay? (581)
(Politico) Fail Newest Obama appointee's office raided by FBI. Left finally comes to terms that Obama is not Jesus. Jesus could actually build a cabinet  T-Shirt (479)
(Politico) Followup RNC Chair Michael Steele backtracking again: When I said I was pro-choice in the interview recently, I meant choice as in keep the baby or put baby up for adoption. Uh-huh (229)
(Washington Post) Followup Evil mastermind Karl Rove intimidates federal appeals court into unanimously upholding most of the bribery and corruption charges against former Alabama governor Don Siegelman (96)
(Huffington Post) Asinine Victoria Jackson on FoxNews: Obama is a communist, Rush, Palin & Hannity should run country, UHF TV is the wave of the future (325)
(UPI) Obvious Israelis confirm that America is still their biatch (235)
(CSMonitor) Silly 88,000 submissions and THIS is the best headline the DNC could come up with? (131)
(AP) Stupid Taxpayers forking over millions to preserve the legacy of a Massachusetts hero. No, it's not Johnny Kerry, it's the fat one with the empty bourbon bottle passed out on the floor (133)
(Some Guy) Interesting RCMP may ban George Bush from traveling to Canada because he is a war criminal (214)
(Washington Times) Dumbass Hmm, an interview with the leader of the Republican party, should be pretty standard talking points. "Abortion? Yeah. I mean, again, I think that's an individual choice." Oops (293)
(Reuters) Stupid Obama gets a failing grade from economists who are upset that he has not fixed the problem they failed to predict (142)
(CNN) Obvious Clinton eyes engagement with N. Korea; puts final touches on Korean "overcharge" button (31)
(Daily Kos) Obvious Seymour Hersh says that Dick Cheney was the leader of an elite secret team of assassins. No word yet on where he keeps the Loom of Fate (139)
(Huffington Post) Interesting MSNBC's Andrea Mitchell admits media's been practicing gotcha journalism on Obama nominees. Imaginary liberal media bias dies a little more (62)
(The Raw Story) Obvious Sean Hannity claims that Christianity is compatible with torture (270)

Wed March 11, 2009
(Hot Air) Dumbass Bush Administration shill Ari Fleischer still trying to push Iraq 9/11 link: "After 9/11, after being hit once, how could we take the chance Saddam might not strike again?" (162)
(Seattle Times) Spiffy Washington state close to passing measure granting same-sex couples the same rights as their heterosexual counterparts. Fundamentalists give their full support...just kidding, they're terrified and gearing up for a fight (863)
(Talking Points Memo) Interesting Obama orders that Bush's signing statements be ignored. That's good. Obama issues his first signing statement. That's bad. It says that earmarks in the omnibus are advisory. That's good. The toppings contain potassium benzoate (115)
(Huffington Post) Stupid CNN online poll: "How do you rate President Obama's first fifty days? Yes? or No?" My vote is on Pie (103)
(USA Today) Scary "Congratulations, sir. You're our one millionth customer. Step over here and claim your prize" (79)
(Free Press) Obvious Newt Gingrich points out that a plan to lower health care costs should include getting people off of their asses and into a gym (209)
(Fox News) Asinine But...but...James Carville said he hoped President Bush would fail (478)
(Talking Points Memo) Dumbass Senator Vitter (R-hookers and diapers) flips out after missing a flight. Angry Chinese lady nods approvingly (85)
(US News) Asinine Pelosi: Oh noes. Air-dropping pallets of $100 bills on Democratic special interest groups didn't revive the economy. (Pause) We need to do it again (423)
(Canada.com) Silly After acknowledging it will run its first budget deficit in 15 years, the Alberta government finally turns to an important issue: Does the province need an official mushroom? (39)
(Independent) Interesting Obama administration staff have apparently put the UK on their Ignore List (100)
(LA Times) Interesting California to the feds: Thanks for the stimulus cash, but we need another $2 billion. Small bills or gift card to the Home Depot preferred, thanks (52)
(CNN) PSA Obama promises to put an end to earmarks... just as soon as he's done signing this spending bill containing 9,000 of them (335)
(Google) Interesting Obama getting slammed by Democrats and Republicans--he must be doing something right (56)
(Toronto Star) Asinine A forty-member task force. Five subcommittees. $50,000 in consultants reports. This year's City of Toronto budget? Why no, it's a study on coffee cups (69)
(Some Guy) Dumbass Early election polls show Sen. Chris Dodd (D-Countrywide) running behind Rob Simmons, Sam Caligiuri, Larry Kudlow, LeBron James, Carrot Top, Rorschach, Strawberry Shortcake, a potted fern, and Hitler, but slightly ahead of Ralph Nader (108)
(Judicial Watch) Obvious "Taken together, these documents show that Speaker Pelosi treats the Air Force like her personal airline" (295)
(Daily Kos) Silly Step 1: Repeatedly edit Obama's Wikipedia article to cast doubt on his citizenship. Step 2: Get banned from Wikipedia. Step 3: Fox News (329)
(Some Guy) Interesting "Chavez has done more for Latin America in the last 6 years than USA in the last 60" (75)
(Right Wing News) Obvious The 10 biggest amateur mistakes by the Obama administration so far (214)
(CNN) Asinine In a change from all previous administrations, Obama is considering charging vets for VA healthcare. That's a change we can believe in. Veteran trifecta complete (129)
(Huffington Post) Amusing Katie Couric wins award for standing back and watching Sarah Palin commit career suicide (194)

Tue March 10, 2009
(Washington Post) Spiffy Obama creates White House women's council. Bill Clinton wishes he'd thought of that (43)
(Reuters) Spiffy Congress passes the $410 billion OmniPork Spendulous Turducken Bill, or whatever the hell Michelle Malkin is calling it today (289)
(Reno News & Review) Unlikely Latest rumor in Nevada is that Mitt Romney plans to move to the state and take on Harry Reid in a Mormon-on-Mormon steel-cage death match for Reid's Senate seat (75)
(WBBM) Dumbass If you were the Mayor of a big city, like, um, Chicago, and you took a bunch of trips on a luxury, private jet, owned by a charity that is being investigated, you wouldn't remember all the trips you took either (29)
(Huffington Post) Obvious Deepak Chopra believes Rush Limbaugh is the icon of anti-morality. Mariska Hargitay (96)
(Des Moines Register) Unlikely Hey, you know what would be a great idea in this economy? A bill making it easier to form labor unions (240)
(The Register) Ironic The same government that wants to collect every citizen's DNA is worried about the privacy implications of Google's Latitude (38)
(USA Today) Fail Head of the president's Council of Economic Advisers: "Government must keep on spending". R.I.P. Fiscal conservatism (313)
(Washington Post) Interesting Congressional Democrats surprised that not all of their party colleagues have lined up for a big swig of Reid-Obama-Pelosi Kool-Aid. Oh yeah (157)
(National Review) Hero Nancy Pelosi in 2006: "Democrats know how to restore fiscal discipline with tough policies of pay-as-you-go budgeting, no new deficit spending". Peloso in 2008: "Fark it, unicorns cost money" (248)
(AP) Obvious Obama backs merit-based pay for teachers, mirroring rest of working world. Naturally, teachers' unions are opposed to this idea (799)
(Tromp d'oeil) Amusing Bad paintings of Barack Obama (83)
(New York Daily News) Obvious 2003: Bush is an idiot for having no plan for Iraq. 2009: Obama is a genius for having no plan for Afghanistan (178)
(Boston Globe) Obvious Instead of being used in ways Bush considers constitutional, signing statements will now be used in ways Obama considers constitutional (118)
(WorldNetDaily) Scary Chuck Norris says there are groups of right-wing cells across the country ready to rise up in a Second American Revolution. If it's true, we may get to find out what happens when Chuck Norris helps Texas drop kick the USA (1429)
(Daily Mail) Interesting African economist writes book on how to really end poverty in Africa, tells Bono to STFU (123)

Mon March 09, 2009
(Think Progress) Obvious Bush was kept out of the decision process when the previous administration finalized their bank bail-out strategy. He was busy finishing "My Pet Goat: II" (233)
(New York Daily News) Interesting Fiercely patriotic and right-wing, 24-year-old Maria Sergeyeva is called the "Russian Sarah Palin". Except she's younger, hotter, blonder, and retarded things don't fall out of her orifices (154)
(Some Guy) Fail AZ State Republicans don't want to let voters decide on tax hike because they fear "voters will not decide the issues the way he wants" (71)
(Think Progress) Amusing Glenn Beck shows surprising thoughtfulness and decorum on stem cell research. Just kidding, he says it'll lead to the search for a new master race (235)
(Pittsburgh Post-Gazette) Cool Son of NFL great Franco Harris running for mayor of Pittsburgh, but is expected to leave the race early by going out of bounds (38)
(CSMonitor) Interesting Turkey warming to Clinton's candor. At 20 minutes per pound though, it could be a while (29)
(LA Times) Asinine In a surprise move, the Supreme Court transcends party lines to require redistricting in unfair congressional districts. Just kidding, gerrymandering is too awesome a word to do away with (57)
(CNN) Dumbass First it was Syria, Iran, and North Korea, now it's the Taliban. Next step for Obama? Bin Laden having tea in the White House (97)
(Daily Express) Dumbass Australian Prime Minister says 'political sh**storm' on live television, sparking a political sh**storm (44)
(ABC News) Hero Republicans say, "Let some big banks fail." Democrats, for some strange reason, seem to have a problem with this (214)
(AOL) Obvious Newt Gingrich slams Rush Limbaugh: "You're irrational if you don't want the president to succeed. Because if he doesn't succeed, the country doesn't succeed. I don't think anyone should want the POTUS to fail." (255)
(Some Guy) Unlikely Congressman declares that we're living through Atlas Shrugged right now. Hope you got a good cave (223)
(The Morning Call) Interesting State senator introduces bill to legalize doctor-assisted suicide in Pennsylvania. Note: May only be used if the Eagles or Steelers lose a Super Bowl (93)
(Bloomberg) Scary It's begining to becoming painfully obvious, Barack Obama is either a manchurian candidate or he just doen't know what the fark he's doing (642)
(Gawker) Sad Jonathan Krohn, the 13-year old who spoke at CPAC calls Barack Obama "The most left-wing president in my lifetime" apparently unaware he is the only left-wing president in his lifetime (245)
(Washington Post) Silly You call it corn. We call it maize. Conservatives call it a part of the insidious liberal plot to destroy America (199)
(AJC) Dumbass North Korea threatens war if satellite is not allowed to fail on its own (91)
(Al Jazeera English) Obvious Kim Jong-il beats Obama at getting elected with a staggering 100% of the vote (141)
(New York Daily News) Weird Eliot Spitzer used to play this little game with the women he hired for sex. Let's just say he helped them out with their Mets-in-September impersonations  T-Shirt (73)
(some Yat) Amusing Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal, after passing ethics reforms banning free concert tickets for lawmakers, passes out free Britney Spears tickets to lawmakers (124)

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