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Fark.com's  Political Inclination Thermometric Analyzer:
Neutral 3.02% Commie
These links may be stale and generate errors. Can't do much about it. Tastes like chicken.

(Headline T-Shirts are still available for archive links.)
Sun January 25, 2009
(Chicago Sun-Times) Asinine Impeached Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich compares himself to Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr., and Nelson Mandela. Also wants "15 angels and 20 saints led by Mother Theresa" for his defence (96)
(NewsBusters) Obvious CNN host notices MSNBC's bias for a certain 44th President. Kids, send in 2 Obama-tine boxtops to Rockefeller Plaza for your Hope & Change decoder ring (121)
(NYPost) Obvious Magazines discover it's good business when they put Obama on the cover (52)
(Washington Post) Fail Al-Qaeda having a hard time getting the Muslim world to hate Obama. Everyone pull out your microscopic exploding violin (103)
(CNN) Interesting CNN: 'Will Obama have to be better because he's black?' Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, WAIT......Obama's black? When the hell did this happen? (95)
(Huffington Post) Asinine Old and busted: Sarah Palin never returned those expensive campaign clothes. New hotness: Well, actually she did. But they're stored improperly at GOP headquarters. Oh the humanity (70)
(Daily Mail) Amusing Maureen Dowd slams New York's newest Senator. Real reason? "Sen. Gillibrand's major crime seems to be that she is 15 years younger and better looking than Miss Dowd." We're going to need a bigger "Oh Snap" (54)
(TampaBays10.com) Misc Hamas opens makeshift offices. Neighbors fear chance of collateral damage will sky rocket (175)
(Some Guy) Amusing Council secretary accused of not knowing how to do her job. She replies, "You can take this job and shove it up your ass" (14)
(Washington Post) Obvious Yeah, you know those files on Guantanamo Bay detainees that you were looking for? Funny story about that (127)
(Toronto Star) Interesting Canadian prime minister Stephen (Steve) Harper confirms that he's never had a BlackBerry, preferring like most Canadians to leave important messages by peeing them into a snowdrift or shaving them into the side of one of the huskies (80)
(YouTube) Obvious Early interview with Rush Limbaugh shows him bragging how he manipulates his listener's emotions for profit. Right-wingers insist they are not being duped (272)
(Reuters) Obvious 20,000 marines spotted moving into Afghanistan. That's change we can besiege in (192)

Sat January 24, 2009
(AP) Obvious Obama now casting 'PRESENT' votes from the Oval Office. AP writes a love letter (192)
(Chicago Sun-Times) Stupid Governor Blagojevich hires Drew Peterson's PR firm, along with Donald Trump's barber, O.J.'s anger management counselor, and Rod Marinelli (46)
(CNN) Unlikely Obama says the economy is so dire that we must immediately start shooting money cannons at groups that donate to the Democratic Party. Also seems to be growing a moustache (276)
(NJ.com) Interesting Secretary of Interior considers taking away the excuse tired parents give to their children as to why they can't climb the narrow and winding stairs to the Statue of Liberty crown (50)
(CSMonitor) Dumbass Sarah Palin is trying to shop her memoirs for $11 million, apparently unaware that memoirs are usually written after you accomplish something (281)
(CNN) Amusing Obama says family planning has been used as a political wedge and has "no desire to continue this stale and fruitless debate." Well, it will definitely be fruitless (320)
(AP) Stupid Looks like arugula's back on the menu, boys (62)
(Spiegel) Interesting Not news: Palestinians in Gaza are angry. News: at Hamas (281)
(NewsBusters) Stupid Debunking the Stimulus Myth: Only 3% Allotted for Road and Bridge Infrastructure, 97% goes to tip for Nancy Pelosi's Hairstylist (150)
(One New Now) Scary "I certainly cannot judge whether or not Barack Obama has a relationship with Christ...However, scripture tells us that you will be known by your fruits and here Barack Obama is promoting counter-biblical, anti-Christian policies" (194)
(American Thinker) Unlikely George W. Bush will be remembered as "The Healer" because he literally saved over 10 million lives while in office (166)
(SMH) Hero It's time to ask: "Won't someone think of the porn fans?" (30)
(CNN) Dumbass Campell Brown wastes no time slamming Obama for once speaking to a lobbyist, reminds us that we're stupid if we like him (144)

Fri January 23, 2009
(Some Guy) Cool A 1474-megapixel photo from the inauguration (206)
(Gawker) Scary Eegaaaaah (69)
(Some Guy) Amusing The whole thing about Obama's inauguration being much more expensive than Bush's? Not so much (112)
(Daily Kos) Amusing GOP website takes credit for the state of the economy (105)
(WBBM) Interesting Blagojevich's lead attorney quits: "I have practiced law for 44 years. I never require a client to do what I say, but I do require clients to listen to what I say" (173)
(Politico) Amusing House Minority Leader John Boehner is concerned about the size of President Obama's package. "How can you spend hundreds of millions of dollars on contraceptives?" "How does that stimulate the economy?" Penis (65)
(The Daily Show) Amusing After only one day of an Obama presidency, Fox News goes full retard (352)
(Cleveland Leader) Sad Obama is the first president in over 50 years to skip inaugural ball honoring Medal of Honor recipients. Change we can believe in (311)
(Nerve) Fail Baker celebrates Obama by renaming his Drunken Negro Face Cookies as Obama Cookies. With "my brother-in-law's Cuban" racist goodness (35)
(Pew Research) Interesting Americans say the economy is the top policy priority for 2009, followed by jobs and terrorism. Global warming comes in dead last, below "stopping Ryan Seacrest" and "forcing people to floss" (44)
(Politifact) Spiffy A checklist of Obama's promises: So far, he's kept 7 and stalled 1 (252)
(AFP) Silly Some numerologist says that Obama's presidency will be filled with good fortune...unless of course the Bible Code "antichrist" rumor is true, or his horoscope reads "you will be overrun by squirrels" (18)
(Reuters) Interesting Obama encourages abortions for a broad (505)
(London Times) Interesting The musical quartet playing at the inauguration pulled a Milli Vanilli. Countdown to someone somewhere claiming that this means that Obama isn't president begins now (229)
(UPI) Followup Aretha Franklin unhappy with inaugural performance, says cold and wind made it difficult to sing, metal stitching in her hat was picking up country station from West Virginia (80)
(WBBM) Spiffy You can vote for the official White House Farmer. In other news there is a White House Farmer (34)
(NYPost) Followup Liberal wing of NY Democratic party goes nuclear when the Governor finds the one conservative, NRA-backed, Democrat Congresswoman in the state and picks her to take She Who Shall Not be Named's Senate seat. Who couldn't see that coming? (196)
(Record Online (NY)) Strange You know your presidency is a cultural phenomenon when the drug dealers name their latest variety of heroin after you (151)
(Philly) Asinine After creating six-figure jobs for eight of his best friends, Pennsylvania governor announces impending layoffs for state workers beginning in July. Bonus: Instructs them to "not whine about it" (69)
(Washington Post) Stupid Apparently McCain is back to being The Maverick™ again (168)
(Some Guy) Hero One third of PA lawmakers have returned their raises to the state treasury. "I hope the citizens in their districts notice who is and isn't paying it back" (40)
(Palm Beach Post) Spiffy Secret Service lets Obama keep his BlackBerry, but he can only communicate with his BFFs; OMG did UC fox nws 2day? ROFL (107)
(BBC) Misc Congo rebel leader arrested, protests he is only pawn in game of life  T-Shirt (48)
(Washington Post) Interesting What do Hayes, Wilson, Eisenhower, Reagan and Obama have in common? (119)
(The Register) Obvious "The Government should not keep information confidential merely because public officials might be embarrassed by disclosure, because errors and failures might be revealed, or because of speculative or abstract fears" (37)
(Fox News) Dumbass Rod Blagojevich compares his arrest to Pearl Harbor. He thinks his accusers are turning Japanese. He really thinks so (46)
(CNN) Unlikely Cheney: Bush should have pardoned "Scooter" Libby. "He was the victim of a serious miscarriage of justice" (95)
(Reuters) Obvious Nashville rejects English-only ordinance in a victory by speakers of authentic frontier gibberish (345)
(Politico) Obvious "President Obama made a surprise visit to the White House press corps Thursday night, but got agitated when he was faced with a substantive question." (302)

Thu January 22, 2009
(UPI) Caption Caption this picture of Obama on the phone (229)
(London Times) Dumbass If you're the Defence Secretary & you're planning to lie to Parliament, get your story straight with Lockheed Martin first. That stuff'll bite you on the ass (10)
(Wired) Obvious Obama to continue warantless wiretapping? It's more likely than you think (176)
(CNN) Interesting President Obama names former Sen. George Mitchell as Middle East envoy, to ensure that the Arab world will be free of steroids (56)
(WPIX-TV) News BREAKING: Kirsten Gillibrand tapped by NY Gov. David Paterson to replace Hillary Clinton in US Senate (207)
(Reuters) Asinine Obama's CIA choice won't define waterboarding as torture. That's change *grblgrbl* we can *grblgrbl* believe in (374)
(Gawker) Amusing If you ask the tattoo artist how much the Barack Obama tattoo costs, and he says "its free" maybe that should tell you something. LGT Most Awesome Free Obama Tattoo Ever (105)
(CQ Politics) Stupid Bill Young (R-FL) makes a reasonable, thought-out proposal on how to handle Gitmo detainees. Just kidding, he wants to put them in Pelosi's district (406)
(WBBM) Cool President Obama's first boss knew he would succeed after a rat ran up Obama's leg during a presentation and he just shook it off. And he wasn't even in Washington yet (142)
(Philly) Interesting Not really up on this whole "threat" business, Hugo Chavez tells Venezuelans either they let him seek re-election forever or he'll leave office in 2013 (227)
(Washington Post) Hero "When President Bush left office on Tuesday, America marked 2,688 days without a terrorist attack on its soil" (551)
(MSNBC) Scary Congress mildly concerned that next stage of banking bailout has $3-4 trillion estimated price tag (215)
(Wall Street Journal) Followup TurboTax responds to Treasury Secretary nominee: Don't blame us for this dude's incompetence (84)
(Houston Chronicle) Obvious Guarding Bush's new home could cost Dallas Police $1 million, or 30 seconds in Iraq (129)
(Washington Post) Asinine With all other problems solved, Virgina legislators debate a ban on plastic shopping bags (64)
(Hot Air) Interesting Economist Robert Reich: Make sure the stimulus money doesn't go to white males, because they're doing fine and it's legal to discriminate against them, anyway (508)
(London Times) Amusing Gordon Brown has a man crush on Barack Obama. "Every time he said the magic word, the Prime Minister's grey and haggard face seemed to be infused with a hibiscus hue of happiness that we have never seen." (36)
(New York Daily News) Dumbass Norwegian envoy to Saudi Arabia hits 'Reply All' on email equating Israel's offensive against Hamas in Gaza with the systematic mass murder of six million Jews by the Nazis. What could possibly go wrong? (292)
(WBBM) Unlikely No, really it's just a coincidence that we have released the "Sasha" and "Malia" Beany Babies at the crescendo of Obamamania. But, pretty good timing, eh? (w/cute as a button pics) (121)
(Gizmodo) Cool Awesome Obama action figure beats the crap out of Darth Vader, terrorists, and people who suck at karaoke, like Dick Cheney (95)
(BBC) Scary Angry Icelandic protestors surround their Prime Minister's car in percussive demonstration (with video goodness) (40)
(Huffington Post) Obvious Impartial political journalist Chris Matthews on impartial news network that employs him: "It sure as hell helps to be on MSNBC today. Let's talk straight here: This is the network that has opened its heart to change" (244)
(Daily Kos) Scary Smile and wave--The NSA is watching you. Right now (257)

Wed January 21, 2009
(Daily Mail) Interesting Expect a baby boom nine months from now because of so many people "celebrating" Obama's inauguration (219)
(Google) Followup Obama retakes oath of office, just to be sure. Article includes handy map locating Washington, D.C (274)
(Reuters) News Caroline Kennedy has, y'know, dropped her, y'know, bid to, y'know, become Hillary Clinton's, y'know, replacement as, y'know, New York's senator (145)
(ABC News) Interesting Obama Administration anounces executive orders to be signed tomorrow. They include officially closing Gitmo and banning torture (391)
(Houston Chronicle) Followup Obama freezes salaries of aides making more than $100k a year. That's change they can bereave in (233)
(Huffington Post) Amusing Stephen Colbert so happy about Obama's inauguration he covers himself with mascara and snot (50)
(Fox News) Followup Hillary Clinton confirmed as Secretary of State by 94-2 vote (204)
(National Post) Interesting Obama's speech deconstructed. This thing has more references than a Family Guy episode, except, well, it makes sense (384)
(Reuters) Obvious Amazingly, China doesn't want Obama to reverse Bush's lucrative deals that have shipped millions of jobs to their country instead of ours (538)
(Telegraph) Interesting Not everyone in the international press has drunk the Obama kool-aid (225)
(Vator.tv) Interesting Obama comes in at #5...behind US losing to Ghana. Wait, we lost to Ghana? (41)
(LA Times) Cool Sarah Palin unveils a statewide green energy plan for her state, as well as a more relaxed hairstyle that makes her look more MILFy than ever (318)
(McClatchy's) Asinine Well of course Obama's Treasury Secretary nominee couldn't pay his taxes: He was too busy flipping houses on adjustable-rate mortgages so he could buy a $1.6 million home. Priorities, people, priorities (120)
(Reuters) Followup White House stops all pending Bush regulations for review (206)
(TheSpec.com) Dumbass Israel: "Okay, we're done kicking the crap out of you for now." Hamas: "VICTORY" (171)
(Washington Post) Obvious CBO: Most of the hundreds of billions in stimulus money won't be spent until after the recession is long over. In other news, look for massive new construction projects to begin in Democratic districts in October 2012 (29)
(Yahoo) Sad Enough with this starry-eyed optimism and hope crap. Here are seven reasons why we're screwed (175)
(London Times) Amusing UK politicians shocked - SHOCKED - to discover that their bid to keep all their expenses secret might not be too popular with voters (8)
(AJC) Interesting Bush twins give the Obama girls some advice about living in the White House, best places to hide the booze (79)
(About.com) Interesting Congratulations, George W. Bush: You are the second president since 1840 to be elected in a year ending in zero and not die in office (95)
(CNN) News Obama freezes Guantanamo Bay for 120 days (992)

Tue January 20, 2009
(CNN) Sappy Thoughts of a 107-year-old African American on Inauguration Day (135)
(Fox News) Obvious Saddam's luxury yacht arrives in Iraq. Will be renamed Barack Throat Warbler Mangrove (64)
(AP) Fail Yes, Chief Justice John Roberts did fark up the Presidential Oath of Office (300)
(CNN) Spiffy They're all just ants (71)
(Daily Express) Ironic This man is the toast of Asia because he looks just like Barack Obama. There's only one tiny problem...he looks NOTHING like him [pic] (77)
(Crooks & Liars) Amusing The Daily Show bids "Adieu" to (former) President Bush...excuse me, I think I have something in my eye (92)
(LA Times) Dumbass FoxNews' Chris Wallace questions whether Obama is really president (467)
(Newsday) Silly The fashion reviews are in. Sasha and Malia "shine" in J. Crew garb (58)
(Daily Kos) PSA The transcript of President Barack Obama's inauguration address (219)
(AP) Amusing New President screws up within seconds of taking office (481)
(Wall Street Journal) Interesting The Opacity of Hope: Why Obama's going to really piss off almost everyone in the next six months (159)
(ABC News) NewsFlash Senator Ted Kennedy evacuated from inaugural luncheon after collapse/convulsions (893)
(LA Times) Unlikely LA Times promises to call Obama out if he doesn't fulfill his promises, which is not likely to happen because he's so eloquent and patient and intelligent (48)
(CNN) Fail Pastor blesses Obama with famous Star Trek quote: "May the Force be with you" (254)
(Houston Chronicle) Sappy Bush leaves note for Obama in Oval Office. White House declines to offer details, aside from it being written with Bush's favorite cerulean crayon (127)
(Fox News) Spiffy Unlike the Clintons, the Bushes aren't stealing everything that isn't nailed down as they leave the White House (296)
(Chicago Tribune) Cool Political columnist: "For Inauguration Day, let's drop all snarky thoughts". Fark Independents™: "Bwahahaha" (204)
(Some Guy) Interesting At his 1905 inauguration, Theodore Roosevelt wore a ring containing a lock of Abraham Lincoln's hair, and other strange and interesting inaugural trivia (26)
(LA Times) Dumbass Now that Obama is president, a teacher thinks books like "The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn" and "To Kill a Mockingbird" should be replaced with more modern, less discomfiting novel documenting the epic journey of discovery (160)
(Gawker) Silly Pick your favorite Obama administration hottie (91)
(Fox News) Sad Dick Cheney injures his back, will attend Inauguration in a wheelchair. MEIN FUHRER, I CAN'T WALK (109)
(Cleveland) Obvious Portraits of Bush and Cheney will be taken down from federal buildings at noon Tuesday and destroyed. "They don't want them laying around so people can use them for improper things." (47)
(Politico) Hero What does Barack Obama do the night before his inauguration? Pay tribute to John McCain at a dinner honoring his campaign opponent. Tag for both (LGT video of speech) (62)
(LA Times) Asinine Raise your voice while on a plane? Terrorism. Making out on a plane? Terrorism. Punish your kids while on a plane? You'd better believe that's terrorism (211)
(MSNBC) Interesting Obama to keep Oval Office rug, saying it really ties the room together (72)

Mon January 19, 2009
(Telegraph) Strange Atheism is missing that one ingredient which makes religion so appealing? Martyrs who died painfully for their cause (485)
(Politico) Interesting Jill Biden said Obama offered Joe two positions. Which is one more than Jill normally offers Joe (71)
(Wonkette) Amusing Will Dennis Kucinich be able to impeach President Bush by noon tomorrow? (116)
(Chicago Tribune) Hero Obama's inaugural parade will include a giant photo from 2003 of him holding a shot plunger and partying with a bunch of drunken Irishmen. That's *hic* change we can believe in (73)
(Breitbart.com) Followup Bush commutes sentences for 2 Border guards (336)
(NewsMax) Fail IEAE in 2007 "There is no evidence at all that Iran is building any nuclear weapons." 2009 "Iran will have a nuke in six months." (523)
(Washington Post) Strange Street Preachers in DC protest "Baby Killing Women, Porno Freaks, Sport Nuts, Drunks, Homos, Jesus Mockers, Mormons." Wait a minute, Sport Nuts? (127)
(Jalopnik) Cool Old And Busted: Obama's new Presidential limo. New Hotness: The Gatling gun-equipped Suburban behind it (202)
(News Hounds) Asinine If you had "2 days" as the answer to "how long will it take for Fox News to blame the US Airways crash on Democrats?" come claim your prize (175)
(Des Moines Register) Unlikely For all the haters: "I'm a Bush success story, former prisoner asserts". In your face. In your face (39)
(Business & Media) Dumbass Spike Lee: God Caused Economy to Collapse to help Obama (152)
(UPI) Obvious Soon-to-be laid-off political appointees of George Bush are scrambling to find new jobs, D.C. Water Board utility flooded with applications (86)
(Guardian.com) Unlikely Hysterical scientist claims Obama has only four years to solve Global Warming. How does he know Obama won't be re-elected? (318)
(CNN) Interesting How to move one family out and another in in less than 6 hours. It's not section 8, it's the White House (113)
(NewsBusters) Ironic Wolf Blitzer compares US Airways pilot who landed his plane in the Hudson River without losing a single passenger to a real hero like Barack Obama. It's not news...it's CNN (357)
(Reuters) Strange Canada's next Prime Minister to be chosen from the categories Anal Bum Cover, The Penis Mightier, and Potent Potables (54)
(The New York Times) Amusing Writers for the Daily Show, Colbert and Letterman concur: Obama presidency will lead to end of comedy (312)

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