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Sun March 02, 2008
(Some Guy) Obvious No matter what happens Tuesday, Hillary is going to continue on after Texas and Ohio (174)
AP Interesting Richardson will not endorse a candidate yet. Rumor remains that the first one to compliment him on his beard will get it (35)
CNN Sappy The Dallas Morning News endorses Mike Huckabee for the GOP presidential nomination, even though he has no chance of winning (29)
(Bloomberg) Florida Florida's Republican governor would gladly approve a Democratic primary Chinese-fire-drill-do-over. Or anything else that will help beat Obama, for that matter (38)
MSNBC Scary Hillary: "Vote for me. I'm the decider" (70)
Daily Mail Sad War in Iraq will soon cost more than World War II (68)
ABC News Obvious Hillary Clinton to release tax returns just as soon as you've all voted for her (33)
CNN Obvious Jack Nicholson on women in 1997: "I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability. " Jack Nicholson in 2008: I am endorsing Hillary Clinton (43)
ABC News Obvious So Congress is all like, "You guys need to testify cuz we gave you this subpoena" and they're all like "No way, dude, executive privilege" and then the AG was all like, "Pssh. Whatever, Nancy." (54)
National Review Interesting In a McCain/Obama contest you have to throw the old electoral map out the window. Throw it out the window I say (78)
Reuters Obvious President Vladimir Putin's chosen candidate Dmitry Medvedev has won Russia's presidential election on Sunday by a huge margin, according to an exit poll from state-owned pollster. So, no need to count votes, Komrade (25)
BBC NewsFlash Hugo Chavez runs out of coke, sends his men to Colombia for more (302)
Reuters Interesting Clinton trails in Texas, deadlocked in Ohio. But honestly, when was the last time Ohio decided an election? (94)
(Huffington Post) Unlikely John McCain will bring back the draft. Never mind that it has been Democrats so far who have been calling for it (137)
AP Scary Tuesday's primary in Ohio may be decided by one county with untested touch-screen voting and a new vote counting system that's never been tested. Buckle up, everybody (55)
AP Obvious "Media expert decries campaign coverage." This headline a repeat from 2007, 2006, 2005, 2004, 2003, 2002, oh to heck with it, every single year since the dawn of time (36)
Boston Globe Interesting Once upon a time, women baked cakes for their schools. Now they're trying to raise your taxes (92)
Yahoo Cool Prince Harry wants another tour of duty in Afghanistan. Hey, if Romney's sons were doing their duty trying to get dad elected, now that his campaign is over, shouldn't they be shipping out soon? (57)
LA Times Asinine Elderly feminists upset that woman are flocking to Obama instead of Hillary. "I see my whole life going down the drain" says Billie Jean King (316)
BBC Interesting Mahmoud Ahmadiplomat makes the first ever trip to Iraq of an Iranian president. Flowers and delicious chocolates expected to flow freely (88)
(Some Guy) Scary All hell may break loose in Lebanon in the next few days (51)
London Times Spiffy Obama is so confident of his impending victory, he is already planning out his cabinet, a cabinet which will include Republicans (130)
CNN Asinine Georgia Republicans don't want to credit black police officers with the pensions that white officers with similar years of service receive, because "It could open up a can of worms." (58)
St. Pete Times Florida Floridians overwhelmingly want sex education in public schools. Debra Lafave re-submits her resume (13)
(Newsbusters) Scary Republican attorney speaks out, admits Karl Rove put her up to smearing Democratic Governor Siegelman (59)
(HyerStandard.com) Followup Hillary's appearance on SNL (video) (96)

Sat March 01, 2008
(Some Guy) Hero Hillary Clinton will star on SNL tonight, and might even cry (209)
Canada.com Followup Taped statements seem to prove Prime Minister Stephen Harper knew his party was illegally offering money to dying Member of Parliament in exchange for vote (41)
Yahoo Interesting Jamaica considers legalizing marijuana. What would Bob Marley do? (40)
London Times Scary Will Chelsea be the next "President Clinton?" (73)
Guardian.com Obvious "In the Senate, Obama distinguished himself by making civil liberties one of his legislative priorities. The effort failed when Clinton joined 13 other Democrats in supporting a Republican motion to cut off debate" (72)
AFP Obvious Nobel laureate Al Gore puzzled that the US presidential primary is not focused on climate change, the single most important issue this side of the Virgo cluster of galaxies (73)
Yahoo Stupid McCain accuses Obama and Clinton of being weak on boarder security because they want to renegotiate NAFTA (52)
ABC News Obvious Giving up on Hillary's bid, Bill is back to doing high profile events with corrupt Kazakhstan businessmen (31)
(An Obama Supporter) Interesting Obama's cakewalk to the Presidency? Might not be so simple after all (232)
DallasNews Dumbass If you're going to upset a group by using their logo without permission, perhaps it is wiser to avoid a group that is armed to the teeth (12)
(MaineToday.com) Obvious Got $1.72 left on that gift card? Maine wants to force retailers into giving you cash at the end of a gift card so you don't have to buy those seven pencils (35)
Bangor Daily News Asinine Maine DEA has its panties in a bunch because one of their officers is in a video drinking at a party instead of sitting at home reading the bible (25)
BBC Amusing Prince Harry, third in line to the throne, on return home: "I generally don't like England that much and it's nice to be away." See, this is why it's a good idea to choose your leaders (95)
Washington Post PSA Door still closed in North Korea. Nobody wants to break on through to the other side (11)
Washington Post Followup Turkish troops pull out of Northern Iraq, high-five Pakistan, promise to call (38)
AP Unlikely Hillary's campaign: Obama losing a single state on Tuesday would show that Democats are having second thought about him. The DUMBASS tag is taking a well deserved vacation on this one (121)
SLTrib Obvious "The next president and Congress may want to give serious thought to whether we can afford to go on spending like a drunken sailor on a defense establishment that's financed like Enron and managed like General Motors." (68)
AP PSA Hillary and Obama have spun McCain's "100 years" comment so out of context so many times that AP felt the need to clarify a few things (110)
(Some Guy) Silly If you want to join the Elks lodge in Brookings, Oregon, just don't mention that you don't believe in God. Or Elks (25)

Fri February 29, 2008
Wonkette Asinine When will Hillary apologize to the Kenyan tribesmen who got their feelings hurt when they saw that picture of Obama dressed like them on the Drudge Report, which Kenyan tribesmen love to read? (63)
AP Amusing Following the Hillary Clinton model of defeat, the Republicans are already making excuses as to why they will lose in the fall. Surprisingly, "no one likes us" tops the list (84)
YouTube Ironic "If one candidate’s appealing to your fears and the other one’s appealing to your hopes, you better vote for the person who wants you to hope.” -Bill Clinton (80)
Reuters Interesting The polls say Obama has a small lead in Texas and Ohio, but his hands tell a different story (54)
CNN Interesting Gates pressures Turkey on Iraq, Iraq says it's had enough and is saving room for dessert (15)
(Some Kos Guy) Hero Bill Clinton endorses Obama. Basically (88)
MSNBC Obvious Yep, time for another Friday afternoon White House resignation: aide to the President steps down after caught plagiarizing 20 newspaper columns (37)
Wonkette Amusing Clinton Campaign: "Obama's winning so much, he's gonna lose." Er, what? (73)
AP Obvious Attorney General Michael Mukasey upholds "zero accountability" strategy for the Bush administration (90)
ABC News Dumbass Hillary on Nightline: Running for President is harder for me, because I'm a woman. Obviously, the road for a black guy with the name Hussein who did coke is much easier (181)
BBC Amusing Mugabe denounces opponents as witches, charlatans, and prostitutes; offers no opinion on gypsys, tramps, thieves (32)
Mediabistro Dumbass Media appeasement enters new phase as batshiat Muslim fanatics are now described by the AP as "human rights activists" (232)
NPR Asinine Chavez wants to exhume Simon Bolivar's corpse in an attempt to prove that he didn't die of tuberculosis. BRAIIINS (74)
(The Prometheus Institute) Interesting How an over-reliance on technology instead of human intelligence is undermining America's war on terrorism (56)
ABC News Interesting Clinton Camp Goes Nuclear in New Ad; Obama Camp Fires Back: 'They Will Fail and Fail Miserably' (202)
(Boing Boing) Hero Billboard Liberation Front helps out AT&T with its immunity campaign (160)
(Some Guy) Dumbass McCain accidentally tells truth, says he is a liberal Republican, talk radio hilarity to ensue (151)
USA Today Asinine Hillary tries to equate "Barry" Obama with a Barry from 1964. Guess this is one more thing she learned from her days campaigning in Texas for Goldwater (135)
(Some Guy) Obvious Obama has shifted left. Since there was no room left to shift to, he is now so skinny you can't see him (194)
NewsMax Strange NewsMax runs a story on the hypocrisy of Obama being criticized for the support of someone he rejected, but McCain getting a pass on embracing another bigot. Now if you'll excuse me, submitter's head asplode (79)
SMH Ironic Israeli minister drops the H-bomb (650)
News.com.au Followup Turkish troops withdraw from Zap region of Iraq, however, fierce fighting continues in Bam and Pow. No word from Pew Pew Pew either (46)
Chicago Tribune Interesting Michelle Obama says that her husband's middle name is a "fear bomb". Hussein? Bomb? Well I'm sold (213)
Kansas City Dumbass Clinton campaign threatens lawsuit over Texas delegate selection rules. Gentlemen, we are at DefCon 2 (130)
MSNBC Amusing Mike Huckabee angry he DIDN'T get the endorsement of the rabidly anti-Catholic reverend who McCain's going to have to reject and denounce later on this week (11)
(politibyte) Interesting Excuse after excuse, it's never Hillary's fault (35)
CNN Dumbass Bush hadn’t heard of people predicting $4 gas. Adds to list of things he hadn’t heard predicted, like the recession, housing bubble, Iraq insurgency, Dem takeover in Congress and al-Qaeda determined to strike in the US (65)
Fox News Unlikely Is Iran the number one superpower in the world? You decide (45)
Washington Post Obvious Obama: "I will meet dictators." Bush: "You idiot" (262)
(Some Guy) Dumbass TN GOP finally removes offensive Barack "Hussein" Obama release after another day of national heat and defending their spokesman (70)

Thu February 28, 2008
(NYT.com) Spiffy Hillary Clinton Raises $35 million in February. Which seems good, until you find out that Obama raised $50 million. Bonus Clinton advisor quote: "Our Internet exploded and it has never stopped" (86)
AP Asinine The U.S. Army field manual has added "nation-building" to their list of responsibilities. We're gonna export democracy whether you like it or not (75)
Newsday Interesting bloOmBerg mAy not be running for president, but announces he MAy sOon Be endorsing A soMeone who tAkes an "independent, nonpartisan approach to governing" Wonder who? (48)
(The Atlantic) Interesting How can Hillary catch Obama in pledged delegates? A detailed mathematical analysis for those of you who majored in miracles (38)
YouTube Asinine Dude crying about Obama's lack of lapel pin shows up on Dan Abram's show without a lapel pin. Self-pwning ensues (470)
AP Obvious Bush: "What recession?" Obama: "You idiot" (155)
NewsMax Interesting Rush Limbaugh encourages Republicans in Texas and Ohio to switch for one day and vote for Clinton (305)
Philly Amusing Rick Santorum frothing at the mouth over the idea of an Obama presidency (202)
AP Cool Senate candidate has metal hook instead of left hand, runs a humorous ad showing him using it to open a bottle of beer. Oregon Farkers, your choice has been made (26)
Guardian.com Sad Nobel Prize-winning economist calculates the cost of the Iraq War to be in the neighborhood of $3 trillion. Duke sucks (101)
Yahoo Amusing More evidence the mainstream media are treating Hillary like a Republican (96)
(The New Editor) Unlikely If you had "some random dude who used to be a San Francisco county supervisor" in your Nader vice president pick betting pool, you win (163)
(Some Guy) Obvious "The reality is that the media is heavily invested in the Black-Camelot-is-coming story, so much so that it is not only sparing Barack scrutiny but also scurrilously covering McCain." (160)
National Post Asinine Canadian Conservative Party may have offered terminally-ill legislator a million dollar life-insurance policy to vote against Liberal budget. Karl Rove scribbles notes furiously (129)
Washington Post Amusing At the Exxon "We shouldn't pay for destroying 600 miles of coastline" hearings today, Chief Justice Roberts asked a question so stupid the people in court openly laughed at him. Clarence Thomas has some helpful advice (462)
(Natl. Assoc. of Manufacturers) Dumbass Sen. Byron Dorgan (D-North Dakota) hates NAFTA and free trade. Guess which state led in export growth last year, with 49 percent of its export business going to Canada? Hint: It rhymes with Dorth Bakota (135)
(Some Guy) Followup After the rousing success of their sex scandal about McCain, MSM is now pretending he's not eligible to be president because he was born in Panama (242)
LA Times Cool U.S. Treasury Secretary Paulson on reckless mortgage lenders and borrowers who didn't read their contract: Nix on bailout, no taxpayer money for you (113)
Time Obvious "Bill's way of grabbing the spotlight has reminded voters of what they didn't like about the last Clinton presidency and what might be wrong with the next one" (47)
(Statesman.com) Misc Bill Clinton stumps for Hill-dog on UT campus, thinks "I could probably bang half these chicks here" (28)
LA Times Followup McCain believes that because people in Iraq call themselves "Al Qaeda in Iraq," that must make them actually in Al Qaeda. Which raises the question, what are we going to do about the Viking occupation of Minnesota? (498)
(WCVB) Obvious It's that time of the year when Amtrak threatens train wrecks if Congress doesn't pay up (86)
(Some Guy) Spiffy McCain endorsed by megachurch that wants to bomb Iran to bring Jesus back (140)
(Prairiepundit) Obvious The Democrats' NAFTA slander (173)
AP Obvious Were energy prices to continue to rise at a sharp clip -- something the Fed does not anticipate -- it would "create a very difficult problem" for the economy. Nudge, nudge, wink , wink, say no more (130)
(NBC-10) Interesting Bill Clinton to grab waitress in Philly diner. BREAKFAST... I mean he'll grab breakfast in a Philly diner. Sorry, force of habit (14)
(Us Magazine) Silly Us Magazine sits down with Barack Obama to ask the hard hitting question: Boxers or briefs? (67)
CBS Pittsburgh Obvious Bloomberg announces he's not running for president. All 14 supporters inconsolable (23)
Guardian.com Unlikely After MP implies that the public is turned off by the jeering and booing and barracking in Parliament, a thoughtful discussion followed. Just kidding, he was jeered and booed and barracked for his pains (24)
YouTube Cool In honor of William F Buckley Jr's passing, here's WFB threatening to punch Noam Chomsky "in the goddamn face" (113)
(Some TNR Guy) Dumbass My friends, John McCain might not be able to "straight talk" his way out of the FEC finance rules he broke (86)
CNN Interesting Taliban making gains in Afghanistan. So there (56)

Wed February 27, 2008
Guardian.com Obvious As much as 70 percent of the $5.4 billion U.S. aid package to Pakistan "misspent". Heckuva job there, Mushy (34)
NPR Scary Olympic committee to China: Improve human rights. Chinese government to citizens: You have the right to remain silent (40)
(Some Wetter) Weird Ontario health minister "seriously considering" wearing a diaper, in the name of research of course (13)
London Times Interesting The U.K. Times reports that a British-Iraqi millionaire loaned millions of dollars to one of Barack Obama's key supporters, just weeks before a controversial land deal that saw Obama--and the supporter's wife--buy adjoining property (101)
Guardian.com Dumbass How the US came to spend over $100,000 for every Iraqi on their liberation (75)
(Some Huff-Po Guy) Followup GOP: Obama anecdote had to be false. Army Captain: No, it was true. GOP: The Captain must be lying. Army Chief of Staff: Nope, it was true. GOP: *heads implode* (106)
Guardian.com Followup One week after gaining the support of Right wingers like Rush during the NY Times "smear job," John McCain loses it with his criticism of Cunningham (45)
(The Atlantic) Obvious All you Farkers that love to yell "B. HUSSEIN Obama": Karl Rove says you should probably stop that (173)
AJC Hero Another nail in the coffin that holds the corpse of Hillary's Presidential dreams: Rep. John Lewis switching his support from Clinton to Obama (38)
Wall Street Journal Scary According to Obama a "patriotic" company is one that pays lots and lots of taxes, is friendly to Big Labor and unions and pays all employee health costs. Oh goody (191)
(Think Progress) Unlikely John McCain: "It doesn't matter that a corrupt politician indicted on 39 counts is on my leadership team." MSM: "OMG that is some straight talk. What a maverick." (47)
Reuters Interesting Kyrgyzstan offers $1,000 for the best song protesting the US presence there. Difficulty: Rhyming with "Kyrgyzstan" (46)
Washington Post Asinine White House: We sent White House emails through RNC servers, then lost them. Democrats: Can you recover them? White House a year later: We can but we won't (73)
CSMonitor Obvious Pentagon wants more soldiers for Iraq and Afghanistan. U.S. Army Chief of Staff asks, "Where the hell are we getting them from? I'm fresh out." Operation Mobilize the Homeless one step closer (164)
(Some Guy) Dumbass Clinton message maker blames voters for not understanding campaign message (140)
(Some Dowd) Obvious It is only because of the utter open-mindedness of the press that Hillary can lose eleven contests in a row and still be treated as a contender (90)
(Obama's website) Interesting One million people have donated to the Obama campaign (342)
Newsweek Dumbass Today's "top state Republican scandal" story features an evangelical DA, racist emails and a longtime secretary/mistress, capped with obstruction of justice and perjury charges. His excuse for it all? Prescription drugs (46)
(Harrisburg Patriot-News) Interesting Rep. John Murtha (D-Okinawa) guaranteed re-election as court tosses out Republican opponent, an ex-Army officer who left the service before retirement and moved just to challenge Murtha. Kicker: His petition was seven votes short (73)
CBS News Unlikely Republicans agree to debate anti-war bill, provided Democrats admit first thing that they are wrong, and that they are stinky poopieheaded traitors with big butts and they like to smell their own butts (112)
CBS News Asinine Governors tell Congress they can't give health coverage to poor kids because the Bush Administration has told them to give health coverage to poor kids. In other news, Washington shut down due to high levels of cognitive dissonance (54)
(NY Times) Stupid Add one more to the litany of irrelevant things people are trying to attack Obama with: His high school in Hawaii was for rich kids (109)
(Michelle Malkin) Spiffy Michelle Malkin uncovers Islamocommunofrancohomofacist plot to take over The Washington Times by intercepting a styleguide memo instructing reporters to stop putting the phrase "gay marriage" in quotes (59)
National Review NewsFlash William F. Buckley Jr. has died. So long, funnyman (235)
(Some Guy) Hero Young people don't care about the political process. They're apathetic, and their opinions are easily... hey, what's that noise? (73)
(TNR) Strange Talk about bringing people together: David Duke, notorious white supremicist, says Obama wouldn't be any worse than McCain or Clinton (98)
LA Times Interesting McCain has slight edge over Obama, Clinton, says poll. In other news, there is somebody else running besides Obama and Clinton (189)
(Cincinnati Enquirer) Followup After John McCain apologizes for Bill Cunningham's inflammatory remarks regarding Barack Obama, Cunningham says he's going to support Hillary Clinton instead (230)
(TPM) Misc Sen. John Warner hospitalized for heart trouble. Doctors examine his voting record on Iraq, conclude it would be impossible for him to have heart trouble (6)
(WWL) Interesting Mayor of New Orleans sends letter to Bush, saying Katrina victims should stay in FEMA trailers although the CDC ordered them out because of toxic fumes. This should end well (51)

Tue February 26, 2008
(Some Eyewitness) Obvious Comcast blocks access to FCC hearing about net neutrality, by hiring people to fill the meeting room before reporters or neutrality supporters could get seats (305)
ABC News Obvious Hillary Clinton says she will "draw contrasts" with Barack Obama during tonight's debate. In other news, her campaign has repeatedly said this week that her negative attacks are actually "drawing contrasts" (1051)
Sign On San Diego Cool BAD: Cops find you passed out with a woman. BADDER: You were lying on the sidewalk near your SUV. FARK: You're the Mayor of the city, and she's a finance employee. TOTALFARK: They drive you home and unlock your door for you (25)
Fox News Followup Arlington, Oregon mayor who posed for pics on a fire truck in her underwear has been recalled. What the fire truck was doing in her underwear, we'll never know (49)
Yahoo Spiffy McCain lays the smackdown on a right wing talk show host for bashing Obama. This is McCain's first official Barack-attack (204)
CNN Amusing This week on "Sliders", Quinn and the gang slide into Hillary Clinton universe (126)
Newsweek Interesting Barack Obama: The first woman president (68)
(Some Guy) Followup Overflowing the "politicans wearing stuff" trifecta, here's Calvin Coolidge in a Indian headdress (59)
(crooksandliars) Dumbass Hannity on Romney: No religious litmus test required. Hannity on Obama: He belongs to a dangerous church (150)
Wall Street Journal Amusing Nader can't run for the Green Party this year; they've already selected a less embarrassing candidate with a better chance of winning: Good old Cynthia "I Hate Jews" McKopslapper (259)
National Review Scary Sen. Larry Craig (R-ough Trade) is looking for interns (214)
ABC News Amusing Huckabee criticizes the New York Times -- for not writing a scandalous front-page smear story about him (29)
Guardian.com Followup Completing the politicians wearing Muslim thingees trifecta, here's Britain ex-PM John Major in a turban (84)
Wonkette Followup You've seen Obama in a Kenyan tribesman costume, but have you seen Hillary dressed in a Muslim hijab? (245)
IndyStar Interesting Indiana Governer Mitch Daniels summoned for jury duty, shows up (54)
The Raw Story Followup The Clinton campaign challenges Matt Drudge to prove campaign staffers were circulating the picture of Obama dressed in local Kenyan attire (571)
CNN Followup Iraqi Parliament condemns Turkey's invasion of their sovereign territory. U.S. looks around, *whistles*... Awkward (86)
AP Obvious Add Sen. Dodd to the list of former Democratic contenders for President who have now endorsed Obama (141)
(Politico) Obvious Following the Bush/Kerry '04 playbook, Obama (let us all genuflect) lets the national press ask questions for ten minutes... same amount of time as "Entertainment Tonight" got all by itself (205)
(crooksandliars) Asinine A 15 point plan for McCain to beat Obama. If you didn't find 'integrity' on there, it's not because you missed it (135)
Rolling Stone Interesting The "surge" is not working. Or why giving arms and money to people who were trying to kill you last month isn't necessarily a great idea (282)
Google Obvious Sean Connery believes Scotland will soon be independent and plans to live there again, hopefully to complete work on the Anal Bum Cover (46)
Yahoo Obvious The White House still has not finished work on a new records management and e-mail archiving system. Likely to be finished on 1/20/09 (50)
The Smoking Gun Scary During political argument, Clinton supporter brings hope and change to Obama supporter's unstabbed torso (87)
Yahoo