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(Headline T-Shirts are still available for archive links.)
Sun January 04, 2009
(Some Guy) Dumbass If you call World of Warcraft tech support, threatening to kill yourself because going on quests is the only thing you have to live for, don't be surprised if the cops Raid your residence, n00b (25)
(Some Guy) Cool What happens when you blow bubbles in freezing temperatures (Pics) (65)
(C|Net) Followup Wikipedia founder Jimmy Wales is NOT out of a job there. Everybody else goes "Ah, shucks..." (29)
(Discover) Cool Discovery Institute creationist lawyer claims the anti-"Intelligent Design" court ruling was because biologist Ken Miller lied in testimony. So Miller takes a tire iron to the jerk. Pwned (227)
(Daily Mail) Asinine Microwave for your car allows you to prepare meals while crashing (37)
(Daily Mail) Spiffy Amazing discovery of green algae which could save the world from global warming (60)

Sat January 03, 2009
(Wired) Spiffy Bringing together the three great loves of Geeks everywhere.. Fire, Star Wars, and... hot dogs. It's the Weenie Wing Commander (35)
(AFP) Unlikely In a completely unbiased study motivated by no hidden agenda whatsoever, Catholic "scientific" study concludes that birth control pills result in serious environmental harm and male sterility (347)
(Washington Post) Silly Arlington County, VA opens virtual office in Second Life, complete with vending machine selling digital Cheez-Its and Pop Tarts. Your tax/Linden™ dollars at work (24)
(Fox News) Stupid Alaska residents, Fox reporter mystified by annual Quadrantid meteor shower (47)
(MSNBC) Followup Tsunami alert lifted after scientists realize the press isn't paying too much attention to Indonesia today (3)
(Gawker) Interesting Wikipedia founder Jimmy Wales is out of a job there. Now he has to choose between Conservapedia and Encyclopedia Dramatica for his next job (52)
(SMH) Obvious Latest ID theft hotness? Pretending to be someone you're not on social neworking sites. You guys should read this, it's pretty interesting-Drew (49)
(daily beast) Amusing Internet critic says increased broadband access will lead to second Holocaust. How did we nazi this coming (75)
(Dallas News) Weird Not News: IE losing market share. Not News: Firefox gains. Not News: Chrome and Safari gain. Fark: Netscape slowly loses market share, but still has about 1 in every 200 internet users using it (77)
(The Register) Spiffy Can't use your iPhone because it's so cold you need to wear gloves? Apple to the rescue (42)
(Some Guy) Obvious World's oldest prosthetic eye found in.... Iran (26)
(The Sun) Cool The model who plays Tomb Raider's Lara Croft is looking for a man. The best part? She wants pics of you (79)
(London Times) Obvious Believing in Darwin and his 'theory' or evolution found to "deepen religious faith" (401)
(Some Guy) Spiffy Wikipedia meets $6 million fundraising goal [citation needed] (35)
(UPI) Obvious Researchers have confirmed the benefits of plants on surgery patients. Most patients prefer them rolled into joints rather than placed on their bedside table (29)
(MSNBC) Obvious Apparently so many people aren't buying DTV converter boxes that the program is running out of money. A government program that underestimated funding needs? How'd that happen? (222)

Fri January 02, 2009
(Gizmodo) Interesting New D+Caf strips detect amount of caffeine in your coffee, Ur+In strips coming soon (25)
(Some Guy) Cool Old and busted: Scientists creating black hole to destroy us all. New Hotness: Scientists creating artificial sun to destroy us all (39)
(AFP) Fail Japanese airport anti-terrorist biometric fingerprint-reading machine fooled by good old "tape on the fingers" trick (28)
(Nielsen Media) Interesting Nielsen has taken to metering how much individual gaming consoles are used. Wiis don't collect as much dust as you'd think, finishing third. Which doesn't sound impressive until you find out the PS3 finished fifth (181)
(BBC) Followup Microsoft says bug that disabled Zune players now fixed, providing immense relief to all twelve Zune owners (104)
(Yahoo) Spiffy New laws require convicted drunk drivers to install car ignition locks linked to a breathalyzer. Submitter wishes they had this for cell phones (147)
(Washington Post) Dumbass Secular progressive "scientists" try to pull a fast one on American public, claim that a comet crashed into the Earth 7,000 years before the Earth was created (47)
(CBS New York) Followup Scientists say Yellowstone National Park now not likely to throw up all over North America (43)
(Bloomberg) Interesting Pre-Presidential briefing Obama: space program is a waste, let's cut it. Post-briefing Obama: quick, let's merge NASA and the DOD to get your ass to the moon in double time. Hmm (188)
(Guardian.com) Interesting British engineers develop cement that absorbs atmospheric carbon dioxide. In other news, apparently regular cement emits more CO2 per year than the entire aviation industry (62)
(Some Entomologist) Cool Cool: Finding a new species of insect. Unlikely: in an airport. No bloody chance in hell: by Customs officials doing an inspection (27)
(BBC) Interesting IBM admits that it prefers to hire employees who play video games, with a preference for WoW players because it "teaches leadership skills." (67)

Thu January 01, 2009
(Financial Times) Asinine Lotus plans to build electric sports car. Because if there's one thing Lotus is a master of, it's electronics (41)
(Independent) Sad Global warming zealots now urging the world to go to Plan B to address their fantasy (245)
(Some Guy) Unlikely Ireland's soon-to-be-former environment minister thinks manmade climate change is a con. Good thing the scientists involved enjoy dissent and healthy debate (22)
(News.com.au) Sad The Great Barrier Reef is farked (32)
(RedOrbit) Interesting Epileptics found to be no more at risk of seizures at work than non-spazzers (27)
(Computerworld) Unlikely "What (DRM) is intended to do is give people choices" (74)
(PhysOrg.com) Interesting Aussies developing mosquitoes with genetically engineered shorter lifespans. Let's see this come back and bite us in the ass (31)
(Reuters) Scary Study ... finds.... type... 2... diabetes ... can ... slow ... the .... brain .... Sweet .... oh, .... wait (17)
(Chicago Tribune) Scary Ash borers spread in Cook County, proving that sometimes one letter is all that separates Illinois from California (17)
(C|Net) Spiffy CNET tech writer reveals five predictions for 2009, including PS3 pricing to be reduced by $100 and Apple iPhone moving to other mobile carriers. Submitter cringes at not seeing "deletion of youtube commenting system" on list (58)
(Chicago Sun-Times) Interesting New research finds that women can contract HIV easier than believed, and that women in control groups are happier (20)
(Fox News) Followup Wondering why your Zune is dead? It appears that the most powerful computer company in the world forgot to account for leap years when writing the software (123)

Wed December 31, 2008
(Cosmos Magazine) Interesting Seven unappetizing species that came back from the dead are even less tasty now (48)
(C|Net) Cool A complete brewery inside of a 2-foot by 8-foot kitchen counter? It's more awesome than you think (81)
(Telegraph) Interesting Scientists to explore sub-glacial Antarctic mountain range. Two will return, one gibbering mad and repeating "Tekeli-li" over and over (34)
(TechEBlog) Interesting Leaked pictures of Microsoft's Zune Touch (46)
(Some Guy) Hero Local businessman offers up a free Nintendo Wii to children whose home was burglarized after Christmas. Even the PS3 fanboys can't help but get a bit teary-eyed (31)
(Sports by Brooks) Stupid Inspired by Chad Johnson changing his name to Ocho Cinco, Vikings punter, who is a video game fiend, wants to change his name to "World of Warcraft" (25)
(Discovery) Spiffy Scientists perfect the "injectable bone", though the last time submitter used the phrase "injectable bone" he got a drink thrown in his face (39)
(Science Daily) Interesting Shade grown coffee increases biodiversity, pretentiousness (21)
(Silicon Alley Insider) PSA My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl who saw Steve Jobs in perfect health at Fraiche Yogurt last night (43)
(BBC) Interesting [Hot, lonely] British housewives spend the most leisure time online, and Germans are more likely to invade people they've met online (22)
(Computerworld) Asinine Microsoft maps out "Pay as you go" computer scheme, to go along with Vista's "Pay though it's slow" method (105)
(Kotaku) Sad 2008 was the first year in a decade that a new "Legend of Zelda" game wasn't released. Either that or we just couldn't find it because we couldn't find that freakin' eastmost peninsula (74)
(Some Buff Gladiator) Unlikely Playing video games give people negative feelings about their bodies. Thier flabby, pasty, Cheetos-stained gamer bodies (29)
(FARK) Survey Fark's 2008 Headline of the Year contest: Geek (details in thread) (58)
(Gizmodo) Fail Microsoft is so blatantly inept that their Zune players are suffering from Y2K9 (173)
(Wired) Interesting Researchers forge a "web skeleton key," thanks to a slip-up by Verisign, and about 200 PlayStation 3s (39)
(C|Net) Cool Apple planning to use new mobile quad-core chips to power 17 inch Macbook Pro, enabling Apple laptops to sterilize you in under 60 seconds (33)
(Some Guy) Cool Mars rovers approach five years of service, which is like 108 in human years (35)
(C|Net) Silly Rumors swirling that Apple is working on a 7-to 9-inch iPod Touch. Code name designated as "Useless iBrick" (58)
(Ars Technica) Stupid Israeli Consulate holds press conference on Gaza war... on Twitter. Hamas threatens to retaliate by defriending Israel on Facebook (31)
(Engadget) Cool The-quattro-6000d. This is how the world ends. With a sewing machine (51)

Tue December 30, 2008
(MSNBC) Stupid Study finds antioxidants don't cut cancer risk. Don't worry, that'll change again in about two weeks (36)
(Reuters) Interesting Sharks have wimpy bites for their size but very sharp teeth, according to famous marine biologist Chuy "Lefty" McStump (10)
(Printer Comparison) Interesting Xerox researching erasa▓▓▒▒░░ (30)
(ZDNet) Obvious And the winner of the 2008 most vulnerable application award goes to......Firefox (138)
(Los Angeles) Wheaton Wil Wheaton gets Vuxed by his wife (90)
(WTOP) Obvious NASA releases 400-page report on Columbia crash detailing possible causes of astronaut fatalities, including falling 100,000 feet, sucking on vacuum, being exploded (178)
(BBC) Spiffy Research finds that soaking barbeque meat in alcohol can cut cancer-causing compounds. Your dog wants beer marinated-steak (28)
(Kotaku) Amusing Greatest Soda Name Ever: Tentacle Grape (46)
(UPI) Scary Oregon town gets earthquakes every othe+++++CARRIER LOST+++++ (30)
(Metro) Obvious 2009 set to be one of the warmest years in recorded history in latest proof that global warming continues to not happen (190)
(Chicago Tribune) Silly Is the iPhone still cool? (92)
(This Is Plymouth) Amusing Evidence of beaver activity in England for first time since 13th century - no wonder the Pilgrim Fathers left  T-Shirt (19)
(Google) Scary "Swarm" of earthquakes at Yellowstone National Park. Suddenly bears stealing pic-a-nic baskets doesn't seem so scary  T-Shirt (305)
(UPI) Obvious Moderate alcohol may cut Alzheimer's risk...or excessive alcohol may make you not give a damn (21)
(The Industry Standard) Obvious New iPhone app allows you to keep track of when Uncle Red is coming to town, reminds you if something bleeds for seven days and doesn't die, it is to be feared (35)
(Pantagraph) Obvious Scientists seek ways to ward off killer asteroids, Aerosmith albums (14)
(Some Guy) Interesting Law enforcement's new 'non-lethal' weaponry resembles science fiction. You have 20 seconds to comply (32)
(Fox News) Obvious 13 most ridiculously obvious sex studies of 2008. Quick, pass the RomeroGlide (Bonus: All on one page) (28)
(C|Net) Obvious Why the PS3 is getting owned by the XBox 360 and Wii. Yes, "It's way too expensive and not much fun" makes the list (458)

Mon December 29, 2008
(Computerworld) Stupid Seven fast fixes for common PC problems. "Buying a Mac" inexplicably not among them (94)
(Gizmodo) Asinine Do Not Want (82)
(Ars Technica) Scary You might have given mom a virus with that digital photo frame you got her. At least this one won't require antibiotics (39)
(PhysOrg.com) Interesting French research team discovers that Neanderthal extinction wasn't caused by climate change, but rather competition, and subsequently surrendering (12)
(Some Guy) Scary Oregon Department of Transportation is considering using satellite technology and mandatory GPS transponders in vehicles to tax people according to how much they drive, find and kill Sarah Connor (303)
(Kansas City) Spiffy Professor discovers spider "missing link" that had plates on its stomach and a long tail (61)
(Spiegel) Strange Male squids are basically psychopathic, mutiliating rapists. Let's see Disney try to make an animated family musical out of THAT (61)
(Seattle Times) Interesting America's classical music composers flocking to game studios to create scores for top games (65)
(PhysOrg.com) Stupid LG makes a 3 centimeter screen for video calls. Can you see me now? (20)
(The Sun) Scary Smoking linked with increase risk of bowel cancer. Somebody's doing it wrong (16)
(MSNBC) Obvious Scientists discover that visiting family "warps your brain." Their water team is also on the verge of confirming that water is, in fact, wet (44)
(Daily Mail) Amusing New paper shredder runs on one hamsterpower. No word on how many rods it gets to the hog's head (24)
(Telegraph) Interesting I'm a shark, I'm a shark. I'm the photo of the year, suck my dick (39)
(Fox News) Interesting Some analog TVs will lose stations when the signal is converted to digital. EVERYONE PANIC (92)
(Guardian.com) Scary New research shows just a few sessions of heavy drinking can damage your ability to pay attention, remember things... and some other damn thing. Come on, let's go for a naked walk in the snow (16)
(InfoWorld) Interesting The top underreported tech stories of 2008 (11)
(Miami Herald) Florida What's with all them funny odd numbers on mah 12-ounce can of Coke? And what's a literacola? (80)
(Some Guy) Cool 43252003274489856000 (105)
(Some Universe) Cool The 50 best astronomy pictures you'll see all year. BONUS: Not a slideshow (but would be worth it, anyway) (17)
(Engadget) Interesting Soon your huge sunglasses will power your devices. Kanye West happy for amount he'll save on his Autotune (11)

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