Drew Curtis' FARK.com -- Geek Archives for '2008-11-02 23:59:59'

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Sun November 02, 2008

	Ferrari-based flying car could be reality within two years. And it's about time, too	(88)
(Some Blog)	The coolest gallery of high speed photography images you will see in the next 1/1000 of a second	(18)
(ScienceBlogs)	Why did Spore, the highly anticipated video game about evolution, fail to succeed critically and commercially? The marketing department told them to ditch the science and go with the "cute"	(83)
	If there's a radio in your hedgehog, don't be alarmed now. It's just there so we can track him	(22)
	Heim Warp Drive Specifications. So long Cochrane and thanks for all the warp core breaches	(53)
	Top 15 scariest video games (screenshots included)	(130)
	New science curriculum board in Texas include three Creationists, plus one more as head of the board of education. Prepare for a long and ugly battle	(204)
	And so it begins... social learning robot observes and interacts with humans, looks slightly creepy	(35)
	Even without LSD, polar bear hair looks like toilet paper and a hummingbird's tongue resembles a spiral staircase	(19)
(Aero-News Network)	Outerspace trucker bomb expected to hit earth on Sunday	(69)
	The world's fastest production car is now American. Duke boys ecstatic	(49)
	Wikipedia founder says internet collaboration still in its infancy[1] (Submission has been edited by moderator for accuracy)	(18)
	"Within the next 20 years, we will see a suborbital six-minute flight get cheap enough to be affordable by most people."	(26)

Sat November 01, 2008

	Berlin transportation company doesn't want you to know where you're going	(23)
(Blorge)	Ballmer says it will be difficult to top Vista "success", most notably because nothing can escape from a black hole of suck	(123)
	One small step for Purdue, one giant leap for Neil Armstrong researchers	(14)
	Jacques Piccard, a scientist and underwater explorer who boldly went where no man had gone before, is dead	(18)
	Not news: Tide changes on Maine coast. WTF: Tide changes 6 or 7 times, in a matter of minutes. Scientists baffled	(80)
	Innovation linked to human migration out of Africa. In related news, hangover linked to submitter running out of beer	(32)
	Scientists develop new strategy to fight obesity. The old combination of exercise, dieting and Fark ridicule just wasn't working	(14)
	Therapy plus Zoloft helps kids with anxiety. Because apparently it's wrong to give kids Jack Daniels and porn, which is the preferred method for adults	(35)
	Pope: "There is no opposition between faith's understanding of creation and the evidence of the empirical sciences" 2+2=5, up is down, left is blue	(222)
	During the time it takes you to read this article, a magnetic portal will open linking Earth to the sun 93 million miles away. Yes really	(45)
(Some Guy)	Politicians concerned that scientists monkeying around with embryos could create a 'humanzee'	(56)
	AOL shut down Hometown and Journals. It's as if millions of animated gifs cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced	(24)

Fri October 31, 2008

	London's new bomb-proof trash cans will survive the apocalypse, keep you updated on stock prices	(15)
	Microsoft reveals the date of the next Windows hate thread	(59)
	Jack-o-lanterns that are sure to get your house egged and toilet-papered	(30)
	Facebook hemorraging cash, runs to Dubai for money	(86)
	Obama and Palin to be playable characters in Mercenaries 2, in which the violence and mayhem of the actual campaign, sadly, cannot be recreated using current technology	(40)
	20 years ago Sunday, the Morris worm blazed a trail for every Internet virus that followed. Ta-da	(15)
	Electronic voting machine vendors claim vote flipping due to "user error". Nothing to see here citizen, move along	(105)
	DRUDGE surpasses NYTimes in page views .. [auto-refresh] .. DRUDGE surpasses NYTimes in page views .. [auto-refresh] .. DRUDGE surpasses NYTimes	(57)
	China says fark it, admits there's probably melamine in everything. (with great "Chinese citizens react to food scare" pic)	(27)
	Babylon 5 creator J. Michael Straczynski is writing a long-in-the-works update of the SF classic Forbidden Planet for Warner Brothers. Submitter was conflicted on tag, so went with "interesting"	(86)
(Some Guy)	$100m satellite that would pretty much lay to rest climate change controversy by measuring the Earth's energy balance is to be launched -- after being stripped of all Earth-facing instruments	(550)
	Today's bone-chilling headline: "Military Investigates Amnesia Beams"	(42)
	New software can duplicate your keys using a photo taken from 200 feet away	(38)
	Bird lovers coax rare owl out of home, resulting in the owl being eaten by a hawk. Ya, Rly	(95)
	How vampires evolved to live on blood alone	(35)
	Time magazine's 50 best inventions of 2008. PITA strangely absent	(15)

Thu October 30, 2008

	Aw, **, those ******ers at Microsoft in' get a ****in' patent for **in' realtime audio f-bomb bleeping	(20)
	Scientists find fossils of eight-armed creatures that preceded dinosaurs, continue to search the Mountains of Madness for evidence of the Cyclopean city of no architecture known to man or human imagination	(49)
	The last McLaren F1 produced back in 1997 just sold at auction for $4 million bucks, is still a bargain	(48)
	Top 6 rejected Guitar Heroes	(165)
	Hubble's back up and running, proves it with a gorgeous shot of a pair of gravitationally interacting galaxies	(25)
	Battlestar Galactica introduction redone for election day	(57)
	New video game using the Beatles' catalog to be released next year. Gameplay expected to be fun until one of the dudes you play with gets an annoying new girlfriend who demands he starts playing the game in ways you don't like	(50)
(Some Guy)	Netflix streams first run-premium content from Starz. Trifecta is now complete	(24)
	Remains of the real Robinson Crusoe's campsite discovered by archaeologists. Ruins of Friday's Family Restaurant still lost to history	(8)
	If you've ever wanted to blow $10,000 on a hover chair, here's your chance	(25)
(Mac Observer)	Not news: Jupiter photographed by an amateur astronomer. Fark.com: Camera was an iPhone	(44)
	Robert Furman, a spy who snatched German atomic scientists away from Hitler and stole 31 tons of uranium ore (while under German fire) has died, along with his balls of steel	(82)
	A video of the top secret Cold War-era bunker where your leaders would ride out the apocalypse while you burned to a fiery ash	(122)
	Destruction of planet Earth delayed until "May or June 2009"	(36)
	TiVo users will soon be able to stream Netflix movies directly to their TiVo DVR	(35)
	15 year old plays too much CoD 4, gets his Crackbox taken away, gets mad, runs away from home. Fark: Microsoft offering $25,000 reward for anyone who finds him	(190)
(Some Guy)	XBox 360 users will soon be able to stream Netflix movies directly through XBox Live. Netflix streaming trifecta now in play	(58)
	Guy builds hidden Batcave at home, uses it to store Lamborghinis underground	(42)
	Protein found not to be the cause of heart attacks. All two wives still performing fellatio breathe sigh of relief	(14)

Wed October 29, 2008

	Scientists find estimates that suggest that another 2004 scale tsunami could happen around 2600-2700 AD. EVERYBODY PANIC...eventually	(21)
	Having reported on everything of note happening to real humans, the Times of London tackles it's next journalistic target: The zombie plague in World of Warcraft	(121)
	Twitter squatting (squitting?)	(36)
	Uh-oh. The Pentagon's all-too-life-like, four-legged robotic beast of burden is about to get a whole lot bigger, stronger, smarter and tougher to slow down	(137)
	Venezuela successfully launches first sattellite, which will be used for "education" and "communications." Venezuelan subby submited this with a different headline but was spell-checked by the government	(33)
	Beautiful parents have beautiful daughters and ugly sons. Beautiful parents have 26 percent more baby girls. Ugly baby boy infantaside detected?	(237)
	"Yahoo's new platform." Unable to think of a successful pun for "platform," author includes photo of platform high heels. Thank you, Rupert Murdoch	(14)
	Chinese software pirates outraged that Microsoft would turn the background black on illegitimate copies of Windows	(88)
	Telling quote buried at the end of this news story reveals why Macs are so much more expensive than PCs: Because Apple's engineers are a bunch of snobby, lazy defeatists. Now pay up	(151)
	University of Minnesota breaks single day flu shot record. Fraternities report all members have received the advertised penis growth/anti-hangover shot	(13)
(Apple Insider)	Apple successfully sues Psystar. Just kidding, Psystar begins shipping newer models with better video cards and Blu-Ray support	(57)
	Downey to play Iron Man three more times	(80)
	NFL stars no match for bacteria, paternity suits	(12)
	The Mars Phoenix Lander is in its death throes	(39)
	Robot maid does housework, but can she save George Jetson from being fired by Mr. Spacely?	(20)

Tue October 28, 2008

	Depressed? Stressed out? Feelings of anxiety got you down? Diagnosis: Too much internet porn	(66)
	The planets are gathering for spooky sunset sky show on Oct. 31st. Click if you dare..muuuuaahahahahahaa	(21)
(Daily Camrea)	Man invents green zero-energy lightbulb. And by green, it actually glows green	(65)
(VGB)	World of Warcraft is now the 75th biggest country in the world	(142)
	Scientists think they've found King Solomon's mines. The theory was confirmed when they were dismembered by angry, gray apes	(94)
	Beans, beans, the musical fruit. The more you eat, the more you toot. The more you toot, the more research is done, still no cure for cancer, son	(28)
	Basement-dwelling online gamer: "I killed a 50th-level wood fairy in WoW last night." USAF UAV operator: "Meh."	(77)
	Microsoft admitting UAC in Vista is a problem? Allow	(58)
	Seven of the greatest scientific hoaxes. Does not include homeopathy, Bigfoot, or Kari Byron's resume	(74)
	Apple stock tanks on Great Depression survivor offering financial advice: "Don't waste your time with iPods and other gadgets."	(51)
(Some Guy)	Mac-o-Lanterns	(10)
	Photo gallery of body scanners used in some US airports to detect hidden weapons and bombs. And in photo number two's case, women wearing strap-ons that drag against the linoleum	(52)
(Some Guy)	Ray Ozzie confirms that Microsoft's next operating system will take 50 years to debug	(23)
	Top 7 cars that CAN KILL YOU	(47)
	If MacGyver had to build a Batman costume from scratch, this is what the mask would look like	(19)
	How the DMCA saved the internet	(19)
	Man proposes by hacking Chrono Trigger	(88)
	Scientists create fake heart. Fake brain is two years away, but fake courage still available at the bottom of a bottle of Jack Daniels	(47)
	Good news: if you are a jerk; scientists prove it is not your fault. But you already believed that, didn't you?	(59)
	Cable company is looking for a few more Cox suckers	(32)
	World's best Lego artist finally finds a girl to marry - and she's quasi-hot. So there's still hope for you. Maybe (pic)	(54)
	In latest proof global warming continues to not happen, migratory birds stay in Siberia instead of travelling south for winter because it's warmer there	(37)
	Pics of the 10 ugliest buildings you'll see in your lifetime. It's not ewws, it's CNN	(124)
	Man decides to invite all 700 of his Facebook friends to a party. Only one person actually shows. Awkward	(69)
	New public transit vehicles unveiled that are shielded so cell phones can't make or receive calls on them. Tag is for whatever Poindexter designed them	(61)

Mon October 27, 2008

	♫ OOOOOooooohhhhh... Who lives close to Florida under the sea? Aphrocallistes beatrix A possible cure for some cancers is she Aphrocallistes beatrix ♫	(15)
	Netflix allows Mac users to watch movies 'on demand'. No more waiting for The Love Guru, The Mummy 3, or Sex and the City DVDs to hit the dollar bin a week later	(53)
(Some Guy)	Article states that Vista no longer matters, implying that it did at some point	(87)
	Writer for The Standard calls to check on last week's iPhones on Capitol Hill story, discovers he's only the second person to try to confirm the article (and that it's false)	(45)
	Man's first barbecue was 790,000 years ago. And yet, we still debate the "Eight buns per pack/10 hot dogs per pack" dilemma	(254)
(Some Guy)	Oregon Motor Vehicle Services Division installing new computers to compare a new driver's license photo with an old license image to see if they match. Because, um, people that work for them evidently can't	(33)
	Scientists discover Earth-like planet actually exists in the same star system where Spock's home planet Vulcan is located	(241)
	Teenage hackers -- the stupidest people on God's Earth	(100)
	Hands-on preview of the $2000 Motorola phone you can't afford	(63)
	Man's only job is to find asteroids locked in on a deadly collision course with Earth. "I don't want to be the one, but that is the name of the game"	(30)
	Teenagers found to be "dumber than a generation ago." Feel free to talk about them here. It's not like they can read	(142)