Bottled water sales fall 10 percent over environmental backlash, realization you're paying $3 a bottle for filtered city tap water	(22)
		Chemistry lessons meet Magic: The gathering, creating a vortex of geekdom so powerful it threatens the very fabric of our universe	(14)
(Some Warlord)		Scans from the official Atari catalog from 1981	(29)
(Some Guy)		IBM creates some kind of magic electrony memory thingee that will save us all	(19)
		Russia honors Laika, the dog who was the first living being sent into space. Also the first to die in space, but they aren't celebrating that part	(52)
		Study of nursery food reveals that too much fruit and veg will stunt growth. Your kid wants steak	(137)
(Some Guy)		Family has owned same Peugot car for 106 years, boasts that with 5hp and spare oil lamps, it still has more features and is more reliable than average General Motors car of today (pics)	(30)
		Nothing to worry about. The earth is actually cooling	(159)
		Researchers discover that low doses of a common anesthetic may help people forced to watch American Idol	(14)
		Fourth grade science project taken to the extreme	(15)
		That laser pointer you use for presentations? It's now a "controlled weapon" in Western Australia	(30)
		Middle America realizes belatedly that there is a thing called Mythbusters, and it is cool	(89)
(Gaming Today)		Parents would rather their little snowflakes play violent video games than ones that contain same sex kissing	(53)

		In preparation for the 2020 moon mission, NASA aims a little lower and sends a mission to central Washington	(14)
		Britain found to have one of world's most diverse populations of dinosaurs when the massive beasts roamed the earth 6,000 years ago	(20)
		Mentioning "John Mayer" works to get Apple users direct replies from tech support. "I'm Steve Jobs' cousin" excuse to come next	(21)
(siberianlight.net)		Russian Space Shuttle floats down the Rhine (Pics)	(34)
		500,000 songs? On *my* iPod? It's more likely than you think	(57)
		"The microwave oven has to be the great enigma of the modern kitchen: It's an appliance that more than 95% of households own but few admit to using"	(78)
		Ten years ago, the Internet Bubble started to grow on the promise of "television on your computer." Ten years later, it's finally working properly	(32)
		8000-year-old trees discovered in Sweden. Wait a minute, something isn't adding up here	(37)
		AMD's chief technology officer resigns. You know, AMD, the chip manufacturer. That's right, computer chips. No, you've never heard of them, either? Bummer	(61)
		No surprise: Our "favored nation" trading partner China has been spying on us for years. The surprise is how they've been doing it. Hint: you might want to close that Word doc before reading this	(222)
		Another Global Warming prophet becomes a heretic	(74)
		RFID reader can now ID velocity and location of tags. Heisenberg seen throwing up hands and stalking off in disgust	(116)
		"Coolest star ever" detected. Insiders predict that within a year it'll be photographed passed out in the back of a limo, with its prominence hanging out of its pants	(12)
		Scientists suggest "rebooting" the brain to deal with drug addiction, leading subby to wonder exactly where the ctrl, alt and delete keys are	(34)
		The ten weirdest conceptual computer designs, including how to build logic gates from dominoes	(10)
		"Survey finds one in 10 words that come out of your mouth are basically, um, er, actually, 'fillers.' You know?	(37)
		Swarm of earthquakes detected off Oregon coast. It's coming	(104)
		Plants thought extinct rediscovered in Australia. No word how close they were to Hitler's birthplace	(28)
		Doctors urge women not to buy expensive fertility kits and just buy a bottle of wine if they want to get pregnant instead	(18)

		Ice shelf the size of Northern Ireland threatened with breakup. Hillary Clinton tasked with bringing together ice sheets and ice shelves	(15)
		World of Warcraft exceeds one million concurrent Chinese gold farmers	(194)
(Slashfilm.com)		Ever wonder what classic Star Wars figurines would look like if they were done in steam punk? Well, here it is anyway	(75)
		Old and busted, red ring of death. New Hotness, pink screen of death. (So that's what the 'PS' stands for)	(30)
(Science Creative Quarterly)		"If you like raisins, you should buy Kellogg’s Raisin Bran in 20-oz. boxes, which appear to contain the most raisins per ounce. If you dislike raisins, we recommend the 25.5-oz. boxes or, better yet, a raisin-free cereal"	(31)
		If you have a domain registered through Network Solutions, they may be stealing your traffic	(36)
(PCMag.com)		Ten things you drooled over in the movies that you can get in real life	(242)
		Japan's 10 funniest tech-related ads	(14)
		N'Gai Croal on Capcom's Resident Evil 5: "Clearly no one black worked on this game"	(234)
		So why hasn't YouTube killed Hollywood yet?	(75)
		Get your frak on early. Sci-Fi airing a live stream of tonight's BSG a full 10 hours before it goes on air	(47)
(Some Guy)		Two-thirds of paper currency laced with cocaine ... no wonder it smells so good	(124)
		Podcasting: Another overhyped 'Net technology to throw on the pyre	(48)
(medicinenet.com)		Research now shows that carrying a few extra pounds may help you live longer. Submitter is damn near immortal	(137)
(Inq)		European Parliament suggests banning Microsoft from government contracts	(35)
(Some Guy)		Right now our Milky Way galaxy is in its dark chocolate phase, if a few more nuggets were thrown into its fluffy marshmallow and caramel center it could cause to enter an active phase and reignite, and that's nothing to snicker about	(22)
		Scientists map Madacascar's wildlife, which according to the pics apparently includes breeding pairs of Sleestaks	(19)
		Hippie apes find love in the Congo. Damn dirty hippies ... um, apes ... um, just kill it with fire, whatever it is (pics)	(25)
		The best closeups of Martian moon Phobos ever taken. You can just make out the Revenants and Arachnotrons	(48)
		Sev n wa s you ca pr v nt hear ng lo s	(30)

		Russian craft docks with international space station, delivers cargo of precious, precious vodak	(24)
		Meet Woody, the bird with a massive pecker that's triple the normal size	(69)
(Some Guy)		Caption what this Space Shuttle Main Engine installer is telling the person on the phone	(199)
(Popular Mechanics)		Top 10 pieces of American infrastructure we must repair ASAP or else we all gonna die. Chicago scores two slots	(285)
		How the iPhone is killing the 'Net	(86)
		Holy crap Strong Bad is getting a Wiiware game	(49)
		Newborns should be lulled to sleep every 33 minutes. No, wait. That's Cylons. 90 minutes. Rock them to sleep every 90 minutes	(59)
		Top genetics researcher spreads his DNA at the bottom of a cliff, performs difficult double-helix maneuver on the way down	(34)
		4 finalists in $1.8M technolgy prize. Too bad there is no technology to help USATODAY reporters spell "technology" correctly	(24)
(Some Guy)		Canada's boreal forest is a ticking "carbon bomb" and its logging could trigger a massive release of greenhouse gases. Like Canadians' efforts to get everybody eating round bacon wasn't threatening civilization enough	(235)
		Microsoft initiates plan of providing free access to APIs by releasing 14,000 pages of coding "secrets". Apps similar to Scrabulous and Super Wall coming soon	(24)
		If you didn't think it was possible for the tandem bike to be any more dangerous, think again	(15)
		Hundreds of fossilized creatures from the Age of Dinosaurs discovered inside of amber. Expect T-Rexes in zoos any day now	(69)

(Mac|Life)		Top ten Apple computer movie moments. Scotty inventing transparent aluminum criminally absent from list	(107)
(Some Guy)		Before it collapsed upon itself just 5,000 years ago, only to be reborn in its current glory, the previous universe may have looked very similar	(75)
		Amazon.com feels bad you bought an HD DVD player, so here's $50	(20)
(Some Guy)		The history of computer data storage in pictures - including huge 10k magnetic drum from 1932	(42)
		Nanofibers repair spinal cords of mice. Submitter's back, for one, welcomes our healing overlords	(30)
		Finally, Mountain View admits "Google is Microsoft"	(15)
		Scrambling for Scrabulous: Is it piracy or in the public domain?	(135)
(Tom's Hardware)		Blu-Ray player prices have risen steadily since HD-DVD dropped out, but consumers are buying them anyway	(82)
		Famous Farker Adam Savage talks about blowing stuff up	(237)
		Sony incorporates payola, rootkit scandals as "missions" in new video game follow-up to Guitar Hero & Rock Band (PS3 exclusive - obviously)	(39)
		This just in: the Olympic torch is causing global warming ALL BY ITSELF	(222)
		PR flunky at leading telco provider accidentally gets the Register on the phone while busily discussing how to politely describe any complaining customers as "a bunch of techie nerds"	(4)
		Xbox 360 Old and Busted: red ring of death. New hotness: Single red light of death. Bonus: Microsoft warranty doesn't cover it	(94)
		Given: Old people fall down. Given: There are more old people today than ever before. Conclusion: We need a multimillion dollar study to determine why more old people are falling down	(66)
		The Pentagon will be issuing hand held lie detectors to troops in Afghanistan. It's not perfect but it comes with a free trip to Guantanamo bay even if you're found to be lying	(65)
		Every now and then an invention comes along which genuinely makes you wonder how the human race has survived without it. This is not that invention	(177)
		Video Game characters that deserve a movie	(112)
		Dell breaks some guy's laptop and in return sends him a replacement full of pubic hair	(130)
(Some Cheerleader)		It has begun: Parents of teenage girl beaten for fun by cheerleaders are calling for the end to internet videos	(372)
		Scientists discover Stonehenge's true purpose as prehistoric fitness club. Wait, what?	(123)
		Study shows that if someone is having a stroke, the best thing for them is to throw a highly venomous snake at them	(28)
		US geological survey expected to report tomorrow that America has roughly 10x the oil reserves already being drilled	(59)
		ISP's annoyed because of the amount of ...buffering... TV people ...buffering... are watching on ...buffering... the BBC website	(16)
		Fox News claims burning coal can prevent global warming	(57)
		Guinea pigs infesting your server? Replace it with IBM's new water-cooled 5.0GHz 64-core Power6 server. Guaranteed 100% rodent free	(32)
		Biggest. Quasar. Evar? (awesome pic)	(51)
		Quit breaking the internet	(29)
(Some Guy)		Intel hopes to protect us from cosmic rays, second Fantastic Four sequel	(10)
		French company introduces new early-warning technology that turns roads pink if they're covered in ice. Here comes the surrender	(20)
		Johns Hopkins surgeons simultaneously transplant six kidneys, create The Ultimate Drinker	(11)
(Scientist Live)		Russia approves world's first ever cancer vaccine validating drug companies strategy to sell drug that failed trials	(14)

(630 WLAP)		La Niña + Global warming = Global Cooling for 2008 according to the UN. Al Gore also stays cool, while moving weather monitoring equipment closer to A/C exhausts	(501)
(Some Guy)		In their desperate struggle against the Cane Toad, Australian scientists are planning on creating and artificial virus that kills just the toads. What could possibly, ever, in a million years, go wrong?	(30)
(Some Guy)		The coolest science tattoos you'll see today	(43)
		It ain't easy being green,....and having no lungs	(12)
(Townhall)		Climate scientist James Hansen believes we should forget his 1988 predictions (that were too high by a factor of 10) and pay attention to his NEW prediction that unless the EU slashes CO2 rates yet again we're all doomed	(99)
		"Robosapien" movie in works. Tickets will cost $100 each, and you will be bored with it after 20 minutes	(44)
		The coolest shots of Minas Tirith built entirely out of matchsticks you'll see until someone makes a really low budget remake of "The Lord of the Rings"	(44)
		Scientists say you can determine if a dog is unfriendly depending on which way his tail is wagging. Also, if he has your severed hand in his jaws or not	(26)
		Don't like the BBC's reporting on climate change? Just write to them, and they'll change it. Repeatedly	(135)
		Can peanut butter go bad?	(72)
		Microsoft ships pre-pre-Vista SP1 update to patch problems with pre-Vista SP1 update, which delayed it until post-Vista SP1. Expect to ship pre-pre-pre-pre-SP1 update by last week	(93)
(Some Guy)		Switchgrass and Poplar tree prices spike on news they can now be turned into gasoline. Termites join OPEC	(49)
(Some Guy)		Old and busted: "Global warming will result in pubs without beer." New hotness: "Global warming will make you blind"	(74)
		Computer calculates whether women are hot or not based on the opinions of plastic surgeons. WHIR, BEEP, DING. Inevitable answer: Needs fake tits	(206)
(Lowell Sun)		Psychologist becomes beetle farmer with a mission after aliens strangle his prized oak tree	(13)
(Planetary Society)		NASA wants your help to decide where to point the camera of the New Horizons probe when it passes by Pluto in 2015	(54)
(Some Guy)		Monkey see, monkey snort	(15)
		American teenagers becoming more British	(25)
(New Zealand Herald)		Scientists warn climate change will result in pubs without beer. EVERYBODY PANIC	(15)
		Good news: advancements in sock technology keep your feet from smelling like ass. Bad news: fish become collateral damage when you wash your socks	(11)
		Daleks at the BBC destroyed early "Doctor Who" episodes but forgot to destroy the soundtracks. Now fans are recreating the old episodes. Is there anything YouTube can't do? w/sample clip	(24)
		"The 40-year hunt for the holy grail of physics – the elusive God particle that is supposed to give matter its mass – is almost over." The Book of Revelation predicted this. You could look it up	(95)

		Alzheimer's vaccine doesn't... doesn't... um....something	(19)
		Say it in binary: Fark	(76)
		Only 10 students currently signed up for University of Illinois online class program, which cost the university $3 million to implement	(29)
		Frank Miller's "Robocop" comic book series prove without a doubt that he's been insane for many years	(46)
		Time.com's top 25 arbitrarily-chosen blogs. Link includes obligatory Drew Curtis quote	(57)
(Business Week)		Don't have your iPhone yet? Worry not, most cell phone manufacturers are rushing iPhone doppelgangers to the stores	(86)
(Some Guy)		GM to test batteries for new electric car. But not with tongue. GM never falling for that again	(37)
		Below the packets of the upper net / Far far beneath in the protocol set / His ancient, dreamless, uninvaded sleep / The Kraken sleepeth: virus checkers flee	(54)
		Astronomers find look-alike to our solar system, goateed Vulcan	(16)
		Artificial sperm on the horizon, drapes	(206)
		First, CERN is about to start up their collider, now virus cells are being used to fight cancer. John Titor trifecta now in play. China, we're looking at you	(42)
		In honor of Gary Gygax, Wired has assembled a gallery of famous people as if they were D&D characters, complete with Rick Astley as a 20th level bard	(76)
(Some Guy)		Scientists discover new superdrug to fight off deadly bacteria strains and even possibly cure HIV: Gator blood	(43)
		Army Corps of Engineers increases surveillance of levees so when they collapse they'll at least get a good YouTube video out of it	(13)
		One fish two fish red fish blue fish three fish four fish can't count more fish	(25)
(Some Guy)		"If you have mysterious back pains which your doctor cannot explain, the cause may be partly due to watching TV commercials about pain-relief medication"	(18)
		Old and busted: You eat Milky Way. New hotness: Milky Way eats you. OM NOM NOM	(27)
		Study shows some people are more devoted to their pets than immediate family members. Your dog wants power of attorney	(36)
		If you've ever watched perilous high-altitude mountain climbing on TV, and thought, "those guys have lost their minds"... well, you were right	(13)
		Contrary to what mothers have said for years, playing in mud may actually be good for your health	(23)
		NASA's plan to land on the moon and Mars held up by lack of funding and the inability to recreate a material developed in the 1960s	(83)
		Online video could destroy the web within two years	(62)