Surprise! Vista updates crashes most users' systems	(31)
(AJR)		American journalists increasingly consider Wikipedia trustworthy source for their stories on congressmen, fantasy football, turduckens, and "Canada's Worst Handyman"	(13)
		Dust readings indicate terrestrial-style planets could be more common, especially under submitter's bed	(4)
		GlaxoSmithKline's new vaccine prevents pneumonia by killing you before you can catch it	(26)
(Some Guy)		Leaked picture of Sony's PSPhone?	(38)
(TUAW)		Researchers claim that smug Mac owners are more likely to buy five pairs of sneakers a year	(37)
		Google renames the Persian Gulf because, well, they're Google	(33)
(Some APOD Guy)		The coolest pic of the Large Binocular Telescope, on Mount Graham, Arizona you will see today	(6)
		Hospitals to ban nurses from wearing their uniforms home based on general public's unfounded paranoia	(20)
		Why do they call you Booger? Top 20 movie nerds of the 80s	(48)
		Kids today give up Facebook and MySpace for Lent	(95)
		Sci-Fi Channel to release a direct-to-DVD movie of their animated soft-porn series "Tripping The Rift"	(37)
		Ford unveils the new Falcon. Ohhh, thats Ford Australia not Ford 1969	(21)
		The Sony PS3 sucks so hard scientists are using them to simulate black holes	(323)
		Scientists create "the most powerful laser in the universe". What could possibly go wrong?	(57)
(Some Guy)		GM Vice Chairman calls global warming a "total crock of shiat"	(162)
		Scientists are close to a breakthrough which could regenerate damaged spinal cords and allow people to walk again	(38)
		British manned space flight is "wishful thinking", especially after Top Gear's space shuttle disaster	(59)
(Tech Radar)		72% of iPhone users are smug	(59)
(Some Guy)		Trap Lightning in a Block	(8)
		Wikipedia defies 180,000 demands to remove images of the Prophet Muhammad	(560)
(Ultimate Chase Video)		Extreme wind video (118mph) from the summit of Mt. Washington, New Hampshire	(63)
		61 things learned about life from playing video games	(45)
(Some Guy)		Ten-minute look at the second-coolest Batman movie coming out in 2008	(34)
		Panasonic unveils $6,700 battery-powered titanium bicycle that can cover up to 150km on one charge	(13)
		Japanese airport cafe offers full-size flight-simulator action with your coffee	(10)

		Icelandic people have 26 words for explosion, but not a word for love	(22)
		Photo gallery of the concept cars at the 2008 Chicago auto show. Your dog wants a Denali	(33)
		$140,000 Hot Wheels is most expensive toy car ever, shows how pointless human existence is	(71)
(Some Guy)		Eleven percent reduction in heart attacks after Italy bans smoking in public	(21)
		Britain's sea birds are facing a deadly new threat from a population explosion of strange, seahorse-like creatures (with pic of a puffin with fish in its mouth)	(14)
		A panel of 18 engineers, technologists and futurists have come up with a list of the top 14 Grand Engineering Challenges of the 21st Century	(53)
		Ben Stein recieves the Phillip E. Johnson Award for Liberty and Truth for his new intelligent design movie	(214)
(Some Guy)		Proof the Lunar Landings were faked. They made commemorative figurines. That so proves it, I mean there's no air in space	(46)
(Because there is no COLD tag)		Så meget is er der ud for Nuuk. (Translation: Is that a growing Ice Sheet in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?)	(18)
		Following Wal-Mart's announcement, Toshiba gives up HD-DVD completely, ending the format war before Paramount and Universal had a chance to give up	(127)
		China says new global warming pact must punish the rich nations, not developing countries such as theirs to whom pollution is a way of life	(48)
		Microsoft refuses to give a hacker credit for finding a security flaw in Microsoft Office because his screen name is Polish slang for a sex act, so he publishes the exploit code. Submitter leaves it to you to figure out who gets the tag	(51)
		124,000 doctors petition the DEA to drop marijuana from its classification as a substance without medical value	(88)
(Some Guy)		We're all sheep	(47)

(waxy.org)		No matter how mundane it may seem, somebody can't wait to hack it. Today's example: the oscilloscope	(27)
(Popsci)		Pound for Pound your Blackberry is more expensive than an Apache Helicopter, less than printer ink	(40)
		The quest to find traces of life on Mars looks gloomy after NASA says the Red Planet was "too salty", therefore never reaching the Age of Bacon	(33)
(FT dot com)		Eschewing the more traditional and less expensive Indian burial ground route, an American has paid $50,000 for Korean scientists to clone his dog	(68)
		Guitar Hero: Aerosmith coming soon. This is the game that rocks for the first few songs, but then ends up with a bunch of lame pop ballads	(41)
		British debate putting fluoride in drinking water, toothbrushes in mouths	(21)
(Science Daily)		Doctors will soon be able to "touch" organs with the help of a display screen. Computer-aided organ-touching already available to the public for $6.99 per minute	(3)
		If you're still using your 5 pound crappy velcro bag-phone that plugs into your 1994 Corolla's cigarette lighter, Monday will be Bad Day	(21)
(Some shiverin' Guy)		The Sun's rays keep the Earth warm. Research: Not for long. Expert: "Stock up on fur coats"	(79)
		Science fact of the day: Chimps can survive unprotected in space longer than dogs	(22)
		Did you get a digital picture frame for Christmas? Made in China? You also got one of the most insidious computer worms ever found	(56)
(news8austin.com)		13,000 hippies compete in nation's first green marathon. Town officials hope that they'll just keep running	(18)
(NYT)		Astronomers spot a smaller version of our solar system 5000 light years away. Vernon Troyer could apparently play center-forward there	(21)
(Alley Insider)		China's biggest wireless company says 400,000 unlocked iPhones, about 10 percent of all iPhones sold last year, were on their network	(12)
		U.S. says it will pay countries for damage caused by debris from satellite it plans to shoot down. Canada rubs hands, plans to claim that Winnipeg was a world-class city before the falling satellite turned it into an unliveable hellhole	(45)
		Walmart rolls HD-DVD up in a carpet, stabs it 12 times and throws it into any icy river. HD-DVD is the new Rasputin	(68)
(Some Guy)		A harp made from frickin' laser beams	(29)
		"Across Canada, a network of devoted volunteers are filming the sky around the clock, seven days a week, hoping their fish-eye lenses will capture a fireball as it plummets to Earth"	(10)
(Phys.Org)		Engineer writes simulation software, test proofs, to determine the most efficient way for passengers to board an airplane	(49)
		It can't be bargained with, it can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse or fear, and it absolutely will not stop. Ever. Until your car is parked	(25)
(Some Guy)		Britain unveils high-tech "laser eyes" for combat troops (with exceedingly unfortunate accompanying pic advertising something completely unrelated)	(122)
		"So, what was your last job?" "I was in charge of marketing Microsoft Vista." "Next applicant, please"	(77)
		Harsh winters drive away all but heartiest birds. Won't somebody please think of the chilled wren?	(155)
		Parasitic worm may cure Crohn's Disease. What a load of crap	(48)
		Sleeping position gives clues to people's personalities. The "log" means easy going, the "soldier" means quiet and reserved and the "four feet above the covers" means you'd best call the Ghostbusters	(233)
		The coolest gallery of nanoscale images you'll see all planck	(16)
		Shaking hands with a stranger saves a man's life. High five	(11)
(i can has cheezburger)		It was bound to happen someday. Guy proposes to girlfriend using lolcats	(58)
		Thought SCO was dead? Think again	(24)
(National Geographic)		Another story you can tell your children: "Once upon a time, there were pristine oceans on planet Earth."	(39)
		It only takes 5% of "informed individuals" to influence a crowd of 200 people - here comes the science	(29)
(Some Guy)		"Now we have structures that can be tailored precisely to capture carbon dioxide and store it like a reservoir, as we have demonstrated. No carbon dioxide escapes. Nothing escapes - unless you want it to do so	(26)

		"You may not have been paying attention but, gradually, the world is moving into a post-PC era, even if it doesn't feel like that between 9am and 7pm when many of us spend those hours in the office gazing at Microsoft programs"	(34)
(Some Guy)		What video game system should you own? A simple yet acurate guide here	(124)
		Sony PS3 seen leading hardware growth in 2008. Unless people start buying a second Wii, of course	(157)
		Turkish scientists consider rebuilding Istanbul (not Constantinople)	(45)
(The Daily Illini)		Flu vaccines ineffective against some strains... EVERYBODY PAN... oh, why bother? They tell us this every year	(32)
		Scientists call new teleportation movie far-fetched, but not impossible. Aye, and if my grandmother had wheels, she'd be a wagon	(98)
(Some Astronut)		How did they get a gun in space? And in the age of batshiat crazy astronuts, what could possibly go wrong?	(84)
		Comcast admits to filtering, blocking web traffic. Stop throttlin' me down, Bubs	(66)
		Global warming killed the Loch Ness Monster. Are you denialists happy now?	(62)
		Smoking while pregnant found not to be harmful to a baby, and can actually be beneficial. Tobacco -- is there anything it can't do?	(49)
(Some Guy)		Artist creates full-sized F1 car using 956,000 matchsticks. Cool tag beats out snarky headline (see the pic and understand)	(49)
		World's first submersible car unveiled. Ted Kennedy intrigued, would like to subscribe to maker's newsletter (pic)	(32)
		Boldly going where no pickled cabbage has gone before	(10)
		Rush Limbaugh begs Steve Jobs for bug fixes	(39)
		Scientists find cretaceous land shark. Finders admit they should have gone with Chevyus Chasicus for scientific name	(52)
(nasa.gov)		Space has "pleasant, sweet, metallic" smell, claims astronaut who hasn't washed his fingers since	(56)

		Anti-drug MP in New Zealand calls for government to ban dihydrogen monoxide. Sadly, this is not the first time this has happened in NZ	(57)
(Some Guy)		Duke Nukem Forever by the end of the year? "I think we’re going to miss it by just a by a few months." This headline recycled from 2007, 2006, 2005, 2004, 2003, 2002, 2001, 2000, 1999 and 1998	(79)
		Net neutrality bill introduced in Congress. To be voted on by 60 year old graying men whose understanding of technology doesn't extend beyond turning on the television	(83)
(ESA)		Titan’s surface organics surpass oil reserves on Earth. Halliburton about to equip the next Saturn probe	(84)
(Some Scientist)		Men enjoy video games more than women, according to new Stanford study that performed MRIs on people playing a game. Obvious tag is for anyone who's ever played Grand Theft Auto with a girl in the room	(67)
		Pentagon may shoot down wobbly spy satellite so its top-secret components don't fall into enemy hands. Shoot-down to be contracted to private firm, Moose and Squirrel Inc	(39)
		"Artificial Skin Mimics the Real Thing" sadly enough this study was NOT funded by the porn industry, but by NASA and their stupid nanotubes thingies	(15)
		So Microsoft picks on Yahoo. Google tells Yahoo to stand up for itself. Yahoo does. Yahoo gets its ass beat. Google runs. Says "ha ha" in Nelson voice	(8)
(Webaware.com)		Four sites that do a better job at being YouTube than YouTube	(36)
(Some Space Nut)		The coolest picture of an F-22 Raptor and the Space Shuttle Atlantis launch you will see today	(91)
		No wonder those astronauts were drinking before launch. Alka Seltzer in zero gravity is awesome	(46)
		Bats could fly before they developed radar, unknown how they overcame walls	(39)
		Having denied blocking bandwidth, Comcast now defends the practice by saying that blocking some file sharing prevents subscribers from hogging the bandwidth and keeps net traffic moving	(95)
		Coming soon to a showroom near you: car that runs on air. Sadly nobody will buy it because it's all sorts of butt ugly	(142)
		Microsoft releases massive set of security updates. Or as they like to call it, "Wednesday"	(58)
(Some Guy)		The Hubble Telescope finds galaxy that is almost 6,000 years old	(83)
		Feb. 13, 1990: The first picture of our solar system looking back from deep space is sent to Earth by Voyager 1. (with pics)	(45)
		Valentine's Day e-greetings could give you a virus as bad as one from your date	(14)

		Farker feels famous for 4 seconds as Google Maps StreetView finally posts his picture (proof/link in thread)	(125)
		Holy Chiquita. Aussie cars set to run on smokin' banana peels	(20)
		UW climatologist says Arctic sea ice continues to shrink. Either that or polar bears are getting bigger	(16)
		Soldiers in Iraq get relief from stress and loneliness with their PS2s and Xbox360s...because war is Halo	(30)
(Some dam fool)		You know that big dam near Vegas with that big lake behind it? Better go see that lake soon, because it's not gonna be here much longer	(71)
(pcmag.com)		Microsoft: The Vista SP1 drivers are not malfunctioning; these are not the droids you are looking for	(39)
		How Google (allegedly) keeps its a-hole count so low	(46)
		Nashville couple not happy with blog that makes fun of them	(20)
(NASA/ESA/Bad Astronomy)		Hubble spots most distant galaxy. Denizens claim they are sick of Britney, Paris news, want Single Female Lawyer finale	(46)
		Top 11 geek pickup lines, part 5. Because geeks need all the help they can get	(56)
(orato.com)		Members of this Turkish family walk on all fours, eerily resembling apes - here's a surprise: the parents are first cousins	(49)
		Gorillas caught on film for the very first time mating in the missionary position. Slow news day	(48)
(Some X-Man)		Marvel Online officially SNIKT-ed. Crushing news to the guy who had the idea to play really original characters like Wolveryne, Wilvereen, Walveraen and Wolferien	(67)
(NY Times)		The science of NASCAR. Basically it's start, turn left, keep doing it, stop	(77)
		Global warming will soon kill thousands of Britons whose pasty skin and weak constitutions are not adapted for temperatures above 66 degrees	(45)
		Eighth plague fulfilled as climate change leads to explosion of locusts. Darkness to descend on world tonight	(27)
		Take two aspirin and call me when the oranges are done	(6)
(Some Guy)		Guy Kawasaki's new online venture does a lot of things, one of the more amusing of which is track online egos	(9)
(Joe)		How to get the most out of your morning fix	(31)
(Some Darwinian)		February 12th is Darwin Day. Try not to be a Fark headline on February 13th	(258)
(Some Guy)		Yahoo may be about to learn that if you flirt long enough with the horny quarterback, you're gonna eventually end up in the back seat -- and your kicking and screaming just turns him on	(36)
		Banking records, music, emails, business contacts. All on your laptop. And all fair game for Customs agents, who can copy and keep whatever data is in there	(71)
(Comic Book Resources.)		Steve Gerber, creator of Howard the Duck, quacks	(48)
		The UK is to be hit by regular malaria outbreaks, fatal heatwaves and contaminated drinking water within five years because of global warming	(21)
		AT&T soon might be protecting you, the Average Joe citizen, from those evil file-sharing sites and other copyright-infringing activity. Thank goodness someone is watching out for us	(29)
		HotOrNot.com sells for $20 million. Founders now 10/10 with the ladies	(15)
		Your pr0n is clogging the p1p3s	(32)
		Italian scientists use small nuclear reactor to test Napoleon's hair, confirm he did not die of arsenic poisoning, downplay reports of giant irradiated Napoleon now ravaging the countryside	(15)
(Some Guy)		Business model: Make a motorcycle that removes everything that a motorcycle is. BRILLIANT	(60)
		Self-cleaning socks developed, threatening the survival of that DNA bank you've got wadded up under your bed	(8)
		How to make a zombie for $50 or less	(16)
		Otherwise useless machine that can drink coffee invented. Despite what you first thought, it's not the people you work with	(10)

		If you think you're having a heart attack, go lie in a snowdrift while waiting for the ambulance. Medical community is beginning to embrace induced hypothermia for cardiac arrest patients	(28)
		Professor invents a tape-like substance that has so much adhesive strength someone wearing it could scale a building like Spider-Man, or restrain that tease MJ long enough to demonstrate your retractable web-slinger	(37)
		Astronauts re-enact Homer Simpson eating potato chips in space (with photo goodness of floating chips)	(51)
		"Critical outage" sends millions of Crackberry users into sudden withdrawl. White-collar riots imminent	(267)
		University of Arizona develops hologram projector, fails to use Princess Leia as first test image	(14)
		DARPA advances artificial intelligence program for air traffic control	(35)
		Scientists claim that time travel will be possible later this year. Can anyone from August confirm this? Thanks	(92)
(io9)		Dubai to build world's longest arch bridge in 2012. And from the looks of the concept drawings, 2012 is going to be really, really cool	(91)
		Google's Android phone software debuts in Spain. That steam you see is massive amounts of cool being dumped onto a pile of hotness	(12)
		Two-thirds of scientists believe in God	(466)
		New all time low temperature for St. Paul, MN: -41°F	(107)
		Netflix to offer only Blu-Ray, marking another huge victory for Sony in the hi-def war	(147)
(Some Guy)		German scientists use synchrotron to find formula for perfect sandcastle, will move on to quantum physics of the Wedgie	(6)
		Humans had been speaking for a couple hundred thousand years before they got the inspiration or nerve to mark their ideas down for posterity on Fark.com	(37)
		Deep inside, even Apple fanboys realize the MacBook Air is pointless, but that doesn't matter because it is soooooooooo thin	(136)
		Thousands of Liverpudlians threaten to leave Facebook after being told to join Manchester network, proving once again if you're not a Manc, you're a wank	(26)
		Revolutionary T-rays expected to result in exciting discoveries, more mediocre fiction from Dan Brown	(35)
		Germans to blast 60 fish into space from Sweden today. Some will be subjected to a "pure zero G state", while others will enjoy the trip in a slowly-turning centrifuge. Wow	(17)
		British gov't says bluetongue-infected livestock likely contracted the disease by contact w/ midges before vector-free period, will widen the bluetongue protection zone. Yeah, I don't know either	(12)
		eBay sellers plan week long strike over fee hikes. Would read article again, A+++	(83)
		Babies fathered by teenagers more likely to be unhealthy, wear "No fat chicks" onesies	(8)
		A video game based on witty banter and giving babies to childless couples? Lame. Video game about knocking up Ellen Page? Hey there, now you're on to something	(16)
		The latest cause of obesity is artificial sweeteners, which added more body fat that sugar in tests. Here coming the sweet, sweet science	(68)
		Time lapse video of the space shuttle doing a backflip for NASA today. Yes, they get paid to do this. Back to your cubicle	(42)
		Smart people more likely than dumb people to become alcoholics. You submitted this with a lousier headline because you were sober, just like always	(36)