Fossilized penis bone from an extinct walrus sells for $8,000 at auction. Fossilized bucket expected to sell for double that	(13)
		Gorillas force zookeepers to reinstate satellite TV access. Your gorilla wants his Spongebob Squarepants	(16)
		Coolest ATV/Jet Ski evar	(10)
		Your favorite beaches could soon be laced with crushed glass; Looks like someone's got glass in their vagina	(98)
		The Canadian city of Fredericton is honoring a world renowned street light expert	(13)
		New fossil records show that the divergence of man from ape occurred 20 million years before the Earth was created	(29)
(Some Photon)		Albert Einstein's Theory of Relativity (in words of four letters or less)	(56)
(Some Guy)		Stop doing that or you'll go blind. Go outside Tuesday and stare at the eclipse instead	(18)
(uberreview)		Top ten most effective/annoying alarm clocks	(51)
		That's a damn fine cup of coffee. Still no cure for cancer	(22)

(Some Guy)		We'll see your 1TB disc due out in 2-3 years and raise you a 50TB protein-based USB flash drive due out in 18 months. Yeah, what format war?	(77)
		Keyless entry codes cracked. Suck it Honda, Ford, GM, Mercedes and Jaguar owners	(24)
(Some Guy)		Move over Blu-ray and HD DVD. Now there is something meatier. Say hello to the 1TB disc. Format war? What format war?	(60)
(Ars Technica)		Windows Genuine Advantage suffers worldwide outage. We're all pirates today	(236)
		Plastic 'Diet Forks' available in packs of ten for $8.95. "The uncomfortable grip compelling user to put fork down between bites, slowing the user's eating speed"	(77)
(NewsObserver.com)		Loss of hemlock trees could devastate ecosystem, suicidal philosophers	(39)
(Some Guy)		If your children are born in the winter or fall, they will have better long-range eyesight throughout their lifetime and less chance of requiring thick corrective glasses	(91)

		China decides enough blasphemy is enough; Sues World of Warcraft for using character fonts	(42)
		Bush's Big Bang buddy bites bullet	(37)
		Australia's $84 million porn filter cracked by student in 30 minutes	(120)
		Toshiba unleashes 32 bit SD cards. That's a lot of po... um, data storage	(44)
(Some Guy)		The rest of the world uses the metric system: a visual aide to understanding the definition of a "meter"	(118)
		Texas's Board of Education, including the creationists, overwhelmingly reject teaching intelligent design. Kansas blames it on the shape of their skulls	(61)
		"It's not fair," Krahulik says. "They could be having sex. With women. Why do they want my hobby?"	(51)
		17-year-old Bergen County Academies student in New Jersey achieves the dream, hacks the iPhone	(158)
(Ars Technica)		The good news: PS3 sales up 60%. The bad news: The PS3 is *still* in last place behind the Wii and the Xbox360	(93)
		Author manages entire article on "UFO believers seeking the truth" without making an X-Files reference	(14)
(vnunet)		Movie pirate whining like a little girl because state-mandated monitoring software requires that he switch from Linux to Windows	(85)
(AC Media)		Scientists discover a protein that blocks long-term memories, note that they will soon make the drug available to people who grew up in the 80s	(44)
		That story about the Australian Prime Minister's office modifying Wikipedia entries? Yeah, the reporters got the IP address wrong and the office never modified anything	(21)
		Astronomers find "hole in universe." Voice of Ed Harris urges against exploring further	(337)
		Viagra makes men feel like cuddling. Yea, that's the ticket	(95)
(Portfolio.com)		Mark Cuban has had his fill of internet porn, wants us all to move on to high-definition porn	(25)
		Taking cues from every 5th grade science project, Sony developing potato-powered Walkman	(10)
(WWdN:iX)		In desperate effort to complete Wheaton trifecta, Wil submits: Klingons Crossing the Delaware	(77)
(Comos Magazine)		Hippie researchers discover how many bong hits it takes to get to the center of an out of body experience	(14)
(Some Guy)		The coolest new photoshopping technology you will see all month, with nerdy video	(42)
		Old and busted: Soil on Mars may contain microbial life. The new hotness: Bullshiat	(21)

		Missing: Founder of the biggest free classifieds site ever. Answers to "Craig". Last seen bathing in a pool of hundred dollar bills, plzhlpthx	(9)
		Video pirate forced to use MS Windows as punishment	(35)
		No online gambling? Okay, we're copying your music, movies and software	(30)
		Soil on Mars may contain microbial life. Marvin the Martian said to be extrememly displeased	(42)
		Open-source companies to watch	(10)
(Tech Crunch)		All of that work filling out your profile on Facebook? It's allowing Facebook to target you with offers and ads	(23)
		"Study: Men With 'Cavemen' Faces Most Attractive to Women." Yeah, but can they buy car insurance?	(31)
		Four-billion-year-old diamonds reveal secrets of the Earth -- one of which is that the Earth is apparently not 6,000 years old	(73)
		Leaked footage from the upcoming "Halo" movie. Could this break the tragic "video game movie curse"?	(87)
		Despite conventional wisdom, many bloggers do real journalism. Examples include stories such as "Scientists Determine My Cat is World's Cutest" and "Asshat Boyfriend Fails to Remember Local Woman's Birthday"	(65)
		Hayden Panattiere stars in "Got Milk?" campaign (with pic). In other news, millions of pasty basement dwellers just experienced a Level 6 nerdgasm	(73)
		Wheaton to deliver keynote speech tomorrow at PAX. When was the last time a Wheaton trifecta was in play? When "Star Trek" was still good	(188)
(The Local)		Top Swedish politician accidentally comes out of the closet on Facebook. Daughter pushes him back in	(40)
(Some Red Shirt Guy)		Just how many people did Kirk kill? Inquiring geeks want to know	(21)
		Game widows grieve for their lost spouses. "Before he got into this game... he was active, outdoorsy, he used to hang out with friends. Now he's agoraphobic and won't go out of the basement"	(87)
(Some Guy)		Turns out almost everything Microsoft makes overheats. They are now recalling racing wheels for the 360	(16)
		Researchers discover 10-million-year-old fossils of ape. No word if it was damned or dirty	(15)
		Bad: Stealing an unsecured wi-fi signal in a public place. Worse: Getting busted for it, and admitting to it. Fark: The guy that busted you and subsequently got your arrested for it had about as much authority as a mall cop	(31)
(Some caveman)		There but by the Grace of Darwin, go we	(19)
		YouTube fans rant, threaten to leave over new ads. They'll get over it	(30)
(Some gal)		...and finally, the latest in technology for your child: The Toddler Taser	(72)
		I.T. execs worry: How close is World War 3.0?	(16)
		Sony figures that since nobody is buying the PS3 for its games, they might as well turn the thing into a video camera	(52)
		A moose warmed my climate once. No really, it was standing there belching and ...	(163)
		Storm worm spam nearly doubles in volume	(10)
(some Opportunity fan)		The coolest Mars pic you'll see... ever	(40)
		Wil Wheaton indicted for running robot fighting ring	(137)
		Paul Giamatti confirmed for "Bubba Nosferatu," but hey, what do I care? I've got a growth on my pecker	(58)
		Playboy launching college social networking site, expects us to believe those girls are really college students	(11)
(Some Guy)		In an effort to continue its march towards a "V for Vendetta" future, the UK is now weighing the idea of putting tracking chips in school uniforms	(40)
(Some Guy)		High school band plays classic NES tunes	(13)
		Nokia announces deal with Microsoft that will bring awesome cutting-edge features like Hotmail to company's cell phones	(11)

		After a global bird flu epidemic failed to materialize, World Health Organization now grabbing at straws to protect its funding and warning that a new SARS, ebola or cooties outbreak has got to be just around the corner	(25)
		Apparently, mobile phones are replacing something called a "landline" whatever that is	(25)
(Some Guy)		You know the Selberg trace formula, the Selberg sieve, the Selberg integral, the Selberg class, the Rankin-Selberg L-function, the Selberg eigenvalue conjecture and the Selberg zeta function? Selberg died at 90	(21)
		Longest Mars simulation mission ever ends as all seven crew members leave island	(6)
		An inside joke for you software developerment and support Farkers	(29)
		Green light? Please, c'mon, I'll change. C'mon, green light. This is the last one, I swear. Green light, pleeeeease	(29)
(Some Guy)		Free will does not exist. Maybe I should not have typed that. I think I'll just go buy some athletic shoes	(56)
		Small Internet broadcasters offered discount royalty deal that could keep them in business through 2010	(6)
(YNet News)		Israeli porn websites report up to 10 percent of their clicks are from Muslim countries. Favorite galleries: "Miss Rachel disciplines the very naughty Arab serving girl"	(279)
		Public image of bats will not be particularly improved by the revelation that they are the source of the Marburg virus	(21)
(Some Guy)		"Heroes" season 2 promo	(56)
		Apple signs deal with three mobile phone companies to sell iPhone in Europe. Enjoying your mandatory AT&T, American iPhone owners?	(43)
(Some Guy)		Drunken Shatner rants to Trekkies about confronting road-rage driver on way to convention by shouting "I am Captain Kirk"	(35)
		Google Earth unveils new "virtual telescope," showing the sky for people too damn lazy to get off their asses and walk outside	(36)
		How a (now former?) Fox employee failed to hack Fark. Subpoenas on deck, BTW	(480)
(PonderAbout.com)		The original development and the continued survival of terrestrial life has rested upon a particular aspect of the Moon's gravitational effect on the Earth	(24)
(Some Guy)		Superman joins Batman in Justice League boycott. Replacement scabs can forward resume to Aquaman next week	(52)
		Scientists rethink how bubbles form. Probably while sitting around drinking buttloads of beer	(11)
		Strange asteroids baffle scientists who plan to fire twice then hit hyperspace	(8)
		Texas company to resume limited production of the DeLorean. Insert lame "Back to the Future" reference here	(34)
(Some Guy)		Fat on chest and upper back increase risk of insulin resistance. In related news, phat chest and baby got back may increase risk of being in a rap video	(7)
		Your Xbox 360 gets too hot -- what do you do? A) Turn it off? B) Point a fan at it? Or C) Set in it a pan of water?	(108)
		Japan to replace the internet by 2020	(28)
		New DNA mapping test allows you to identify what diseases you'll get 30 years from now. You might as well know about it - your insurance company sure as hell does	(65)
		Chemists take time out of their busy schedules to figure out why dark-roasted coffee tastes like ass. Still no cure for... oh, nevermind	(65)

		Did you know that a T-Rex could outrun a professional football player? You can thank the University of Manchester for this relevant information	(25)
(Scienc Blogs)		What would it take to artificially make a male pregnant? Here comes the science	(28)
		The "Cosmos"-less Science Channel Discussion Thread	(208)
(Monkey Trials)		Meet the guy who has done more damage to the creationists in the last decade than anyone else -- quite literally	(56)
(BoyGenius Report)		"'Laptop computers' and 'professional quality audio reproduction' go together like 'Michael Vick' and 'innocent.'" In lieu of Technology tag, Amusing makes an appearance	(8)
		A Uganda study has found that uncircumcised men who washed soon after sex increased their chances of getting HIV. In other news, Uganda conducts scientific studies	(40)
		Dodge Caliber SRT-4 pricing and specs announced. How about 285 hp for $23,000? Suck it, Hondakidz	(85)
		TiVo Las Vegas	(9)
(nbc11.com)		Which is more newsworthy? The fact that Steve Wozniak got busted for driving 104 mph, or that he reached that speed in a Prius?	(133)
		There's some manioc, manioc in Mayan lore. And it's preserved like it's never been preserved before	(23)
(Science Daily)		Meet Acrylamide, the next naturally occuring chemical in your food to panic about	(52)
		Unlike that first car you ever owned, space shuttle makes it home intact, again	(129)
		MTV and RealNetwork join forces against Apple. Wonder Twin powers, activate! Form of: Black hole of suck!	(40)
(The Australian)		It's back to the drawing board as scientists discover the opposite of the cure for cancer. Still no cure for science	(10)
(Some Guy)		First it's "rocket powered" prosthetic arms, next thing you know SkyNet's gone self-aware	(18)
		FPS "Bioshock" owes more to Ayn Rand than to "Doom." So instead of shooting demons, you're talking people to death on Internet forums?	(115)
		The average person's inability to set up a home network is "the elephant in the room that no-one wants to talk about." Plus it doesn't help when you can't retrieve the elephant's network address	(67)
		Porn will never be the same again	(26)
		Massive dead star found near Earth, and it's not Anna Nicole Smith	(35)
		New concept for a time machine could possibly enable distant future generations to travel into the past and give us the damned thing so we don't have to wait for the technology to make it a reality	(69)

		Prestigious medical journal publishes article on 2005 'World of Warcraft' epidemic	(35)
		New DeLorean production now official	(34)
		We now know how sunshine is made	(27)
		Researchers discover that girls really do prefer pink. Submitter seeking funds to study blueness of sky, wetness of water	(144)
		Stereotypes of gamers persist because they are accurate. Farkers laugh at those pale-skinned, virgins dwelling in Mom's basement. Oh, wait	(36)
		Study reviews that the more times a surgeon has performed prostate surgery, the better the odds are for the patient. Obvious tag finally decides to schedule its prostate exam	(5)
(Some Feline)		When a cat steps over an obstacle with its front legs, how do its hind legs know what to do? Caturday-like theme brought you by the University of Alberta, Canada	(31)
		Voyager spacecraft celebrates 30-years out of this world	(31)
		Famous phone hacker "Joybubbles" dies, he whistled while he worked	(22)
(wtfiswrong.com)		E^(pi * i) = -1, but how?	(112)
		Dreamworks, Paramount drop Blu Ray, go HD DVD only. PS3 in bioshock	(161)
(Mobile Choice Blog)		Hey cellphone manufacturers: those whizzy features in your cutting-edge handsets? Users don't want 'em. New research says they want "a more basic phone that's easier to use and more affordable"	(79)
		Open source developers face H1-B visa puzzle	(27)
		Scientists trying to inventory universe find majority is missing, blame wives for moving molecules from counter where they had left them	(280)
		Shipping soon: 64-core chips that can pass up to 32 terabits a second between cores. "Dual Core"? Hey, good luck with that	(27)
		New Canon camera fires 6.5 frames-per-second at 10.1 megapixels. Your sorry-ass cell phone last seen quietly leaving the room	(104)
(Times of India)		Forgot your cell phone charger? No worries, just charge the phone with your body	(13)
(Some Guy)		Points to ponder while calling tech support	(63)
		As if it wasn't bad enough that the CIA, FOX News, and the New York Times did it, now the Vatican is hacking Wikipedia pages. In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti	(28)
		Interactive report on hurricane hunters and their aircraft	(7)
		College freshmen meeting their roomies ahead of time on Facebook	(34)
		Artificial wet life called "likely" in three to 10 years. "We're talking about a technology that could change our world in pretty fundamental ways; in fact, in ways that are impossible to predict." EVERYBODY PANIC	(67)