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Sun May 23, 2010
(Some Guy who needs a map)
It's the LOST finale thread. Your last chance to post your pathetic theory on how The Island is really a spaceship
Someone with way too much time on their hands has diagrammed the interior of the Tardis
Jeremy Irons is worried that a new, terrible, devastating plague will strike the earth in order to cut down on overpopulation. And no, he's not doing press for a new technothriller either
It seems as if Lady Gaga will do anything to meet Hugh Laurie
ABC and NBC have found themselves in the middle of a television war, with jokers like The CW on one side and clowns like CBS on the other
Shrek takes the box office with $71.3 million, lower than predicted. Maybe it's a sign that audiences are tired of Mike Myers, Cameron Diaz, and Eddie Muprhy. Oh, and crappy animated franchise. Bonus: MacGruber earned a whopping $4.1 million
Sure, tonight is the finale of the confusing and pretentious Lost, but a great episode of Breaking Bad is also on this evening, and EW recommends it over Lost
(music-News)
I don't know what a Justin Bieber is, but he knows "exactly what to do with the screaming girls"
Ric Romero investigates services that help you cover up an affair. "Public figures like John Edwards and Tiger Woods quickly learned their consequences when their affairs were made public"
The Skank has landed. I repeat, The Skank has landed. Alert the Health Department and declare LAX a Quarantine Zone
Emma Watson would like you to know she is still single. I sense a sudden upswing in admission requests to Brown
CBS releases extended preview of "Sh-t My Dad Says", and it sucks on a level that can only be described as "Jim Belushi". Subby expected much more from the first show based on a Twitter feed (with video preview)
Poorly tattooed Asian MySpace dwarf-slut Tila Tequila joins cast of "Celebrity Rehab," despite the fact that there isn't really a cure for the stupid yet
YES
TMZ gives the Celebrity Scramble treatment to a big-name actress. Hard to tell which pic is scarier
Robert Pattinson cuts his hair for new role, still keeps Kristen Stewart as his beard
Sat May 22, 2010
Crystal Bowersox performs an original at age 13. Even then she shone like a Jewel
Original codpiece from Blackadder could fetch £1,000 at auction. Did it play a big part? Depends on who wore it
The real reason Megan Fox left (that's right, she chose to leave) is because Michael Bay was verbally abusive towards her, like he was towards Kate Beckinsale. Do what you will to Megan Fox sir, but mistreat Ms. Beckinsale and we will fight
The writing team behind Rounders, Runaway Jury and Ocean's Thirteen sit down and talk about their new film, Solitary Man and the upcoming Rounders 2 and Untouchables prequel they're working on. Jesus Christ, none of that is good
(Comic Book Resources)
ThunderCats writer Stephen Perry missing. With homicide possibly involved, police could really use some of that "sight-beyond-sight" right about now
"Shrek 4" ready to take the weekend with $70m in ticket sales at the box office. Meanwhile, "MacGruber" has earned...well, go on, guess. No, lower. Nope, lower than that. Keep going
Will Paula Abdul return to American Idol? Will anyone care? Will it get canceled? Let's hope
Jimmy Kimmel Live presents a LOST-themed edition of "Unnecessary Censorship", and it's probably the best one he's ever put together
Parents Television Council offended by the word "bleep"
(Some Rutan)
Thirteen classic Doctor Who villains that are just begging for a return to the new series
Warner Brothers being sued for stealing antipiracy technology
Jesse James says he is the most hated man on the planet after throwing away his marriage to Sandra Bullock
(Some Guy)
Alternate universe "Fringe" comic book covers (side by side with our world's)
(Some Guy)
Confessions of a Walt Disney World cast member
The seven best action-comedies of all time. It's a good list, the order is a little off, but you can't really complain
(Digital Spy)
Kevin Jonas and his wife sleep in separate beds. Please remember, Kevin Jonas is not gay
Sean Penn and Naomi Watts star in "Go F*ck Yourself, Dick Cheney"
With 'MacGruber' hitting theatres this weekend, plans for an actual 'MacGyver' movie are announced; the script will be written with a rubber band and tinfoil
Is it any surprise that the owner of a beer-dispensing VolksWagen is a Farker?
(tvsquad)
TV's 50 most shocking moments. Strangely absent: when your dad jammed a coat hanger wrapped in tinfoil into the old Quasar to get better reception (only two pages, not a slideshow)
The American version of "Shameless" is going to be awesome, if only for Not safe for work Emmy Rossum sex scenes
(Some Fruit)
It's a slow news night, so here's a gallery of female celebrities eating bananas
(Some Spectre)
Hollywood not the only place out of ideas. Asian studio set to remake Ghost. Patrick Swayze to oversee production
Fri May 21, 2010
Thu May 20, 2010
Bret Michaels back in the hospital with -- shakes Magic 8-ball -- a hole in his heart
Justin Bieber gets up close and personal with a revolving door
(TV Squad)
Craig Kilborn to host a new Fox talk show until they get a better host
"Shrek" sucks. What's most troublesome is the bellwether they set for an entire decade of derivative rip-offs
Counselor Troi and Commander Riker pitch a post-Trek family sitcom "The Rikers."
Unaware that being stuck in France is its own worst punishment, judge issues warrant for Lindsay Lohan's arrest
Harrison Ford & Peter Mayhew were reunited last night at the 30th Anniversary screening of "The Empire Strikes Back." Mayhew still walks with a cane, but it's a lightsaber cane
(Topless Robot)
Well, it looks as if Topless Robot saw the Fark thread about the 11 Most Disturbing Moments in Kids Movies, because they're back with 11 more, including that damned Superman III robot scene
Paris museum with broken security system has $120 million worth of Picasso and Matisse paintings ripped off overnight. "These five paintings are un-sellable, so thieves, sirs, you are imbeciles, now return them"
Drew Barrymore to direct sequel to "The Wizard of Oz." There are at least two things badly wrong with that sentence
(Some Wasp)
The villain in the Avengers movie? Skrulls. And it sounds as if this may be a prelude to the Kree-Skrull war
(ktla.com)
Upstanding citizen, benevolent philanthropist, and all-around good guy Suge Knight arrested again
Warner promises latest effort to reboot Looney Tunes characters will stay true to their roots. Quote WB spokesman admits that "The bar had gone so low that we could only go up,"
(Some Guy)
Fans don't think Val Kilmer is "lickable" anymore. But they do want to pinch those chubby, fat, wittle cheeks
When "Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides" arrives in theaters, you can watch Captain Jack Sparrow's rum disappear in 3D
John Travolta may be trying to reincarnate his dead son with his new baby. That's a pretty farkin' good milkshake
Reformed womanizer Ashton Kutcher on Demi Moore's first impression of him: "She thought I was a douchebag." How could THAT be?
In the most inspired casting since Jamie Foxx played Ray Charles or Heath Ledger played the Joker, Susan Boyle will play a lunchlady in "Glee"
With "Law and Order" canceled, NYC theater actors wonder where they'll be able to pick up a few bucks playing a judge, dead body or doorman anymore
Megan Fox: "Putting my mouth where a million other mouths have been, just knowing all the bacteria that you carry in your mouth? Ucch." So much for advancing your career, Megan
Eli Roth undergoes surgery after hostile sea urchin attack
After dealing with cockroaches and kangaroos in films, Jerry O'Connell will contend with a different kind of animal in his new TV show: lawyers
(Digital Spy)
Summit won't replace "Twilight" co-stars after all. Sparkle on, you crazy diamonds
(Some Guy)
Supermodel *fap* Kate Moss *fap fap* had a lesbian fling *fap fap fap* with Courtney Love. *PPpppsssssssst*
(Some Guy)
Lost your Job? Never seen Lost? Sunday is the series finale, so what do you do? Try and watch every episode in a non-stop marathon, of course
The 'Seinfeld curse' finally catches up with Julia Louis-Dreyfus
Six tips to keep in mind when you go to see MacGruber. Is it actually possible that this thing doesn't suck?
The upcoming Captain America movie will be providing a big boost to American workers and the LA economy. Just kidding, they packed up and moved all filming to London to save money and get tax breaks
Wed May 19, 2010
'Modern Family' mom Julie Bowen gets 'double football' breastfeeding snapshot that 'The View' wouldn't run aired on 'Lopez Tonight' instead. Good for her (with possible Not safe for work pic)
Anthony Bourdain says he likes Baltimore, won't apologize for portraying city as home of "lake trout," pit beef, and lack of crabcakes in recent episode of "No Reservations"
"Smallville" to finally end after next season, Tom Welling to become Superman at last
(Deadline.com)
Megan Fox, vapid Hollywood starlet, kicked off of Transformers 3, vapid Hollywood movie. Subby wonders, kind of a net win for both sides here?
Marvel, Iron Man 2 and the shared universe problem
SyFy Channel's only tolerable original programs, Eureka and Warehouse 13, will finally have crossover episodes with one another
At this point, actor Jonathan Rhys Meyers may as well buy a second home next door to a rehab facility
Teaser for Manborg, a film about cyborgs, Dracula, arena battles, hoverbikes, kung-fu, and demon-nazi-vampires. What, no werewolves?
It's not that he's suing Heroes for stealing his story line. It's that he's actually admitting to coming up with that shiat
Just spend the time gawking at the beauty of Gemma Arterton instead: "Prince of Persia: The Sands Of Time" is "less abysmal than the dozens of other videogame adaptations that have gone before it"
(Las vegas Sun)
Las Vegas magician Steve Wyrick files for Chapter 7 bankruptcy. Ta Da
Nicolas Cage makes vegans and fad dieters seem almost normal, by deciding to eat only animals that fark in a "dignified" manner. At least he won't become a cannibal
We're one step closer to discovering what a Justin Bieber is; he's been nominated for a BET TV award. So, he's African American and presumably works in television
Headline that would get the rest of us arrested: "Parker To Take Seven Year Old Son To See Sex"
Travoltas, mourning the loss of their two dogs in a freak airport accident, play shake the thetan and are now expecting a new family member
(24 World News)
Londoner will get the opportunity to hammer a naked Kate Moss
The seven most ridiculous "from the hood" films of all time. Say what you will, but "Don't Be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood" has its moments
Good news: Eddie Murphy has a masterplan for saving his career. Bad news: It involves the farking fatsuit again
Twins blah blah blah France blah blah blah bad plastic surgery
Tue May 18, 2010
(Some College Hottie)
Elin Nordegren returns to school to become a child psychologist. Fitting, since she married and had two children with the most immature man-child this side of Charlie Sheen
Bradley Whitford says to expect lots of fun, action and a moustache in his new show "The Good Guys." You had Subby at Bradley Whitford
Megan Fox: "I hate being told I'm talented." Because I'm sure that's something she hears all the time
7 new genre shows coming to TV in the Fall. Bonus: Michael Chiklis gets superpowers
(Some Guy)
Mick Jagger doesn't give a crap if you pirate music because The Stones "didn't make any money out of records because record companies wouldn't pay you. They didn't pay anyone"
Have you ever wanted to see a portrait of Oasis' Noel Gallagher made of breadcrumbs? Too bad, here it is
Terry Gilliam enlists Ewan McGregor for upcoming "The Man Who Killed Don Quixote," awaits next natural disaster to crush his set to dust
(Some Idolator)
The American Idol song database. I think it's time for the planet-killing asteroid now
Don't even think about looking at Rick Fox - or Eliza Dushku will CUT you
24 years later, Tom Cruise reunites with "Top Gun" love interest and co-star. Man, Anthony Edwards really aged badly
Most memorable TV finales. Lost amazingly is included because something will finally happen on the show
Charlie Sheen returns for another season of "Two and a Half Men," which is excellent news for all trannies and high-end escorts living in Los Angeles
Greyson Chance is making people forget about caring that they never really knew what a Justin Beiber was
Bret Michaels tells Oprah he wore his bandanna during his entire intensive care stay. "I said, 'If I'm going out, I want to go out rockin'"
Martin Scorcese announces George Harrison documentary at Cannes
"House M.D." to be turned into a video game. Submitter hopes it's a first-person shooter where you play as Dr. Kutner
If you were an avid viewer of Star Trek in all its various forms, then you can figure out the mysteries of Lost. Seriously
Steven Spielberg's new TV show "Terra Nova" is Land of the Lost meets Avatar. I'm not sure, is that good or bad?
Mon May 17, 2010
(Some Murdock)
First pics of the upcoming A-Team movie action figures. I love it when a collection comes together
(Some Guy)
Have you ever noticed that Hugh Laurie only has one facial expression?
I don't know what the hell a Justin Bieber is, but it just got a tramp stamp
Hulk Hogan has been forced to wear extensions after accidentally melting off his hair
(Some Jedi)
Looks like Hoth has warmed over; Mark Hamill is directing a feature film
Fox has given the go-ahead for four new comedies that will, ultimately, be canceled
Alice Cooper is up front about his feelings for today's musicians. They suck
Charlie Kaufman-- the mad genius who wrote "Being John Malkovich" and "Synedoche, NY"-- has just finished work on his most twisted project ever: "Kung-Fu Panda 2: The Kaboom of Doom". No, really
Article about Tiger Woods' mistresses complains about Tiger Woods' mistresses still being in the news
Lady Gaga wants to speak like the Queen. One can only assume that she means Priscilla, Queen of the Desert
Nathan Fillion isn't Captain America, which sucks, but he may very well be Edgar Wright's Ant-Man instead, which is awesome
(Deadline Hollywood)
What would "The Office" be like without Michael Scott? Doesn't matter because we'll find out after next season anyhow
Javier Bardem to produce and narrate documentary, friend-o
(Digital Spy)
Scarlett Johansson insists that her "Iron Man 2" character is smart, forgets to let her catsuit do all the talking
(DigitalSpy)
Spencer Pratt's parents have removed photographs of the vapid fame whore from their home and would like to erase him from existence
(Digital Spy)
Chelsea Handler insists that melted eyeballs aren't a big deal
Because absolutely nobody gives a shiat anymore, NBC might give Heroes a two-movie finale
Elizabeth Hurley is trying to fall pregnant. That can't be good for the baby
Reviewer says Sarah Jessica Parker's shoes are the only interesting thing about Sex and the City 2. Probably because they bring you good luck
Former top six-figure country-music radio DJ talks about his $35,000 job opportunities since being fired by Clear Channel in 2009
(Mojo In The Morning)
Photos surface 12 hours after being crowned of Miss USA on a stripper pole (not exactly safe for work, plausible deniability available however)
Michael Bay announces he's removing the annoying, controversial, stupid duo that pissed everyone off in Revenge of the Fallen from Transformers 3. Sadly, it isn't Megan Fox and Shia LaBeouf
Nothing New: Lindsay Lohan walks into a bar. Stupid: starts a fight over a seat near the DJ. Fark: with 2 NHL enforcers
(Some Sylar)
Zachary Quinto thanks fans on his blog for supporting Heroes all this time. Huh. You'd think he could have sent personal emails to all fifteen remaining fans
Woody Allen, the guy who once took naked photos of his long-time girlfriend's young daughter, comes out in support of Roman Polanski
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