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Sun September 14, 2008
(Female First) Obvious Naomi Watts prefers filming love scenes with women, because there is no "sexual tension" between females. Giggit...what? (22)
(Guardian.com) Interesting What were Amy Winehouse, Simon Cowell and other celebrities like as kids? Just ask their teachers (9)
(Bitten and Bound) Followup JLo did her first triathlon - well not exactly a triathlon but an abreviated celebrity version for charity. Does that count? (17)
(USA Today) Obvious Reviews are in, SNL still not funny (87)
(London Times) Hero Most Hollywood political commentary is pure drivel. But every now and then someone goes and does something like this (20)
(Now Magazine) Obvious Robert Downey Jr says his friends used to question his sexuality because he walked round in Sarah Jessica Parker's frilly dresses (22)
(Reuters) Obvious Coen brothers win the box office war this weekend, even though "Burn After Reading" is often the public opinion of anyone reading their screenplays (95)
(Guardian.com) Cool While waiting for "Evil Dead 4", a big screen adaptation of "Evil Dead: The Musical" is in the works to be shot in 3D, allowing "various types of gore" to fly towards the audience. Groovy (21)
(Showbiz Spy) Obvious Ricky Gervais insists his smile is so unsightly a group of journalists recently asked him if he donned a set of prosthetic teeth. Entire British nation shakes its head in understanding (15)
(Guardian.com) Amusing Q&A with legendary filmmaker John Waters:"What is your favorite smell?" "Poppers" (24)
(LA Times) Cool The Village People get a star on the Walk of Fame .... near the Hollywood YMCA (4)
(Some B-Movie) Interesting "The Hand That Time Forgot": An exploration into how and why the unthinkably horrible "Manos: The Hands of Fate" came to exist (41)
(Some Guy) PSA How to hit on a model. Surprisingly, "Can I buy you a sandwich?" missing from list (38)
(AZCentral) Interesting Oprah and Herb Alpert are the two most generous celebrities in the world, although old Farkers are wishing he'd been less generous with the whipped cream (27)
(Reuters) Obvious Old & busted: Tom Cruise and Jennifer Aniston. New hotness: Brangelina (8)
(LA Times) Stupid Kathy Griffin runs her mouth off in a profanity-laden speech at the Emmys' creative arts ceremony. No, this is not a repeat (28)
(London Times) Interesting Tippi Hedren claims after she spurned Hitchcock's advances, he ruined her career: "I have to be very Kabbalah about it" (24)
(London Times) Interesting John Le Carre considered defecting to Soviet Union (6)
(Canoe) Amusing Horrible films (almost) saved by one scene of awesomeness (57)
(Daily Mail) Amusing "It's the worst horror movie ever made - and I was the star desperate to appear nude in it" (47)
(London Times) Spiffy U.K.'s new TV superheroes hang out in pub, including Thundermonkey who "can summon monkeys to obey his commands, but they take hours to make it from Africa" (11)
(News Of The World) Obvious Proof that Heather Mills is crazier than a shiathouse rat. As though anyone else needed it (15)
(DailyMotion) Video Tina Fey comes back to SNL to play Sarah Palin. Here's the video (211)
(Fox News) Sad David Foster Wallace: "The End" (51)
(Defamer) Asinine Not news: celebrity spends onver $300,000 on their kid's sweet 16 party. News: It's Courtney Love, and it the party had a suicide theme. Fark: Francis Bean showed up in her dad's dress (32)
(Starpulse) Spiffy Queen Latifah is considering naming her next album "The L Word," just to fark with the people who think she's a lesbian. Melissa Etheridge cries: "You're doing it wrong" (18)

Sat September 13, 2008
(SacBee) Sad Peter Camejo, Ralph Nader's running mate in 2004, has died (36)
(Newsweek) Obvious "Ten years ago, the prospect of Robert De Niro and Al Pacino on screen together would have provoked me to race you to a theatre. Now all I see is two men stooping to self-parody in paycheck roles" (66)
(Starpulse) Strange Out of all the newscaster hotties out there, Shia LaBeouf admits having a crush on Diane Sawyer (49)
(TC Palm) Cool After being released from jail on his marijuana possession charge, Ron White sends pizzas to sheriff and jailers (130)
(Now Magazine) Dumbass From the "You Sure Know Which Roles to Choose" Files: Dana Delaney turned down the roles of Carrie Bradshaw in "Sex and the City" and Bree Van de Kamp in "Desperate Housewives" (74)
(io9) Unlikely Russell Brand, the douche bag who appeared at the MTV movie awards wants to be the next Dr. Who. Hollywood executive scramble to create an American version (65)
(Some Guy) Cool There's no bones about it. David Boreanaz is up for the role of Green Lantern in the live action movie. Producers think he will bring a lot of soul to the part (45)
(Variety) Spiffy 27-year-old Natalie Portman to make directorial debut with Hebrew-language adaptation of Israeli author's memoirs. George Lucas puzzled, scowls about all that sand (32)
(Contact Music) Interesting Even when Michael Bay's apartment gets burgled, the burglars are AWESOME (26)
(Starpulse) Cool Spike Lee has plans for Wesley Snipes when his tax troubles are over: he wants him to portray pcp-addled James Brown, wrapping cars around telephone phones in upcoming biopic (15)

Fri September 12, 2008
(TMZ) Amusing Why don't you -hic- have a seat -hic- over there -hic- (32)
(Slate) Amusing Why is Seth MacFarlane funny again? (66)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Spiffy Hugh Laurie will make $9 million next year for being a cranky prick. Dick Cheney wants a raise (44)
(London Times) Stupid How to piss off Chef Gordon Ramsay: Call him an alcoholic, offer to box up his salad, joke about British food, order egg with no yolk, pretty much just breathe (39)
(Variety) Interesting Obama to make Saturday Night Live appearance this Saturday, lame lipstick jokes expected (132)
(Sci Fi) Cool "Iron Man 2" director Jon Favreau says the Mandarin will be the bad guy. Insert Asian stereotype here (86)
(Huffington Post) Obvious Rupert Murdoch on Bill O'Reilly's constant Olbermann whining: "Bill shouldn't be such a pussy." (218)
(Starpulse) Obvious Nikki Sixx is a big fan of Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers. No, just kidding, he says they're ruining rock 'n roll (139)
(Some Guy) Sad After the huge success that was the movie version of "Postal", Uwe Boll scores another contract for a movie based on a video game (67)
(Starpulse) Amusing Jamie Lynn Spears pulls the 'old switcharoo' and fools the paparazzi at LAX with a decoy (21)
(etonline) Obvious Tina Fey may return to SNL to play Sarah Palin. The pig from 'Babe' is also in the running (92)
(io9) Amusing This year's Halloween episode of "The Simpsons" will be more than meets the eye (74)
(Guardian.com) Interesting A look at the films that were so bad that they changed movies forever (119)
(io9) Silly Janet Jackson takes a page out of Tron Guy's disturbing book (31)
(Chicago Sun-Times) Sad Roger Ebert attacked; claims he saw stars, 2 1/2 of them (43)
(News.com.au) Amusing Aussie radio host uses the "dingo took my baby" joke on the wrong Aboriginal TV star. Warning: amusing use of "just a commercial wanker". With audio goodness (23)

Thu September 11, 2008
(NYmag) Amusing Mickey Rourke is in hit movie for first time in years, but that doesn't mean he's not a bag of crazy anymore. Also, someone should really inform him that the "Barfly" shoot is done (39)
(London Times) Obvious MSM discovers phenomenon of Homestar Runner and Strong Bad emails, tries to explain its popularity (96)
(TMZ) Followup Video of Kanye attacking photographer while wearing little girl backpack (47)
(Kanyeuniversecity) Cool Finally a drivable landspeeder, built by former LucasFilm employee (44)
(Examiner) Ironic At New York Fashion Week, "Be EcoChic" turned out to be as effective of a mantra for green living as "Drill, baby, drill" (36)
(The man himself) Cool A Game of Thrones moves one step closer to being ruined by HBO (195)
(Contact Music) Florida Ron White arrested for bringing Mr. Green with him to the airport (79)
(Dark Horizons) Stupid Sure, Universal will give Battlestar Galactica the runaround, but they'll jump on the chance to make a live-action Sigmund & The Sea Monsters movie. So sea we all (52)
(LA Times) Obvious LAPD cares about black people: Kanye West arrested in Los Angeles for felony vandalism, impersonating Steve Urkel (198)
(Some Guy) Stupid Judge commends Nicole Ritchie for managing to stop making a complete mockery of herself (36)
(AP) Obvious Matchbox 20 singer Rob Thomas admits he takes longer to get ready than his beard... er, wife (36)
(Now Magazine) Scary Keira Knightley wants to get pregnant to stop people accusing her of being anorexic. Scary tag wins out over Dumbass tag (92)
(Some Guy) Amusing Nicole Kidman has surpassed Russell Crowe as the most overpaid movie star in Hollywood. At least she has teh boobies (39)
(Variety) Interesting Michael Douglas to play Liberace. The point is, ladies and gentleman, that sequins, for lack of a better word, are good (25)
(Starpulse) Spiffy You can watch a movie with Dustin Hoffman, Cameron Diaz, Denzel Washington and other stars for $25 as part of AFI promotion. Ben Affleck will pay you $25 and buy the popcorn if you sit through one of his movies (26)
(Starpulse) Amusing Phelps might lose on purpose. The five worst performances by an athelete hosting SNL (65)
(Kansas City) Cool Craig Ferguson tells his studio audience, "If you don't vote, you're a moron," then hands out voter registration cards (132)

Wed September 10, 2008
(AP) Sad "Fletch" author Gregory Mcdonald dies, maybe (61)
(Contact Music) Sad Medics face difficulties unbreaking Toni Braxton's heart on the set of "Dancing with the Stars" (18)
(TV Guide) Spiffy J.J. Abrams "Fringe" is Fox's best drama debut in two years. Still doesn't answer smoke monster question (132)
(LA Times) Misc Did Anne Hathaway turn her ex-boyfriend in to the cops? Bonus: Great picture of her impersonating Amy Winehouse (45)
(Access Hollywood) Spiffy Toby will come back in the new season of "The Office," and other things to look forward to. Sadly, "Pam does nude modeling" not on the list (72)
(AP) Interesting "One Tree Hill," which is a TV series not a single one of you has seen, is back for a sixth exciting season of doing whatever it does (44)
(Now Magazine) Interesting Pete Wentz says it's best he doesn't own a gun because depression might make him go out and shoot someone (36)
(Some Guy) Stupid The latest washed up B-movie actor to run for office (shakes magic eight ball) is Val Kilmer (192)
(SFGate) Obvious The lowdown on Fox's new show Do Not Disturb. "Hell, it makes Cavemen look like Cheers" (34)
(NewsBusters) Amusing Matt Damon compares Palin's rise to VP candidate as a "really bad Disney movie", which is slightly worse than a really bad Matt Damon movie. Matt Damon (238)
(Washington Post) Interesting Joe Eszterhas, writer of films that gave us Sharon Stone's cooter and Elizabeth Berkley's stripper pole, explains how he found Jesus (30)
(Aint-It-Cool-News) Amusing Feature length version of Greatest American Hero will be coming to theatres, George Constanza's answering machine (32)
(WTAM) Dumbass Singer Eric Carmen all by himself during 2nd DUI arrest (43)
(MSNBC) Amusing The cast of Airplane reunites to talk about the movie. Funny stuff. [video] (173)
(Starpulse) Spiffy Alex Borstein gives birth to an 8lb 10oz baby boy, who emerges firing a ray-gun and shouting "Victory is mine" (35)
(Daily Mail) Interesting Heather Mills writes a completely fictional novel about a world-famous musician who's a total dick and a sweet, beautiful one-legged model that he tries to sell into slavery and feed to sharks (47)
(Some Guy) Obvious The buzz around the new opera 'The Fly' based on the movie and also directed by David Cronenberg, are actually real flies. Next up: Videodrome - The Musical (18)
(London Times) Obvious Britney Spears' great-grandparents were a little on the trashy side (32)
(People Magazine) Stupid Ashton Kutcher to bring his loud and obnoxious brand of magic to the realm of football coaching (24)
(Entertainment Weekly) Silly Seth Green talks "Robot Chicken," and his new gig on "Heroes." Well, actually he doesn't say anything (41)

Tue September 09, 2008
(Defamer) Spiffy "Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles" finally gives viewers a reason to tune in: Garbage lead singer Shirley Manson, morphing from a men's urinal into an old-school T-1000 liquid Terminator (156)
(MTV) Spiffy The Kurt Cobain of comedy, Mitch Hedberg, releases his final comedy CD "Do You Believe In Gosh?", which was actually culled from several performances, so you get less nodding out between jokes (122)
(Hollyscoop) Sad Howard Stern's dignified brand of humor proudly brings you a new low: Auctioning off your virginity on air. To make it more palatable to American audiences however, 22-year-old Natalie claims to be doing it to finance her edumacation (102)
(Defamer) Dumbass "Hey, Brooke Hogan, what do you think about Sarah Palin?" "Who's that?" And even more classics from someone close to being too dumb to breathe (71)
(Access Hollywood) Scary Lance Bass threatens world with likelihood of an NSync reunion. Oh, the boybandity (14)
(Mirror.co.uk) Interesting Old Spice unveils new short haircut that observers say makes her look 60 years younger (108)
(Yahoo) Spiffy Finally, the positive effects of Nanny Statism: Fewer Andrew Lloyd-Webber musicals (34)
(The Tennessean) Silly Home football teams 26-4 when Martina McBride sings the national anthem. It's not news, it's The Tennessean (21)
(Fox News) Spiffy Minnie Driver gives birth to a nine pound, 12 ounce son. Ms. Driver's spokesperson says that Minnie's first reaction to the birth was "Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow." Bonus: She named him Henry (63)
(People Magazine) Dumbass Jerry O'Connell is in the doghouse for calling wife Rebecca Romijn "huge." Amusing tag has to sleep on the couch for the next month (32)
(Entertainment Weekly) Cool Interview with Joshua Jackson on "Fringe." Bonus comments include how he's going to switch to beer for his next photo shoot (20)
(Variety) Interesting A tale of two theme songs (27)
(Contact Music) Obvious Keira Knightley swears that she's finished with the "Pirates of the Caribbean" franchise, wants to find a new meal ticket based on a Disney theme park ride (67)
(News.com.au) Weird Fran Drescher picked to be the new voice of American diplomacy, presumably in the hope that people will agree to anything just to get her to shut the hell up (100)
(Entertainment Weekly) Interesting Entertainment Weekly presents the 20 greatest sci-fi TV shows. Inexplicably, "Homeboys in Outer Space" doesn't make the cut (103)
(Starpulse) Obvious Alec Baldwin spiraled into depression when the public learned that he is an asshole (52)
(The Sun) Weird Kylie Minogue is having so much trouble finding a man to date that she's considering switching to the home team. The Sun is there (82)
(io9) Interesting Hellboy to grumble his way into the hearts of TV audiences? (13)
(Contact Music) Interesting Carl Weathers got a divorce stew goin' (40)
(The Moscow Times) Interesting Russians discover drive-in cinemas. If they hear about rock-n-roll and mini-skirts, communism is doomed (56)
(wcnc.com) Weird It's tag team pandemonium when Ric Flair and his daughter square off against the Big Boss Man and some random guy. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (43)
(The Scotsman) Obvious Doctor Who wins award for best-loved drama at British TV awards show as judges shun lame UK remake of "The Office" (42)

Mon September 08, 2008
(Reuters) Interesting J.K. Rowling can go back to her plans of buying the entire UK after judge kills fan-made Harry Potter encyclopedia (16)
(Fox News) Unlikely Dakota Fanning vows to not wind up a drugged out skank like so many Hollywood teens before (59)
(Starpulse) Amusing Britney Spears not upset by her mother's tell-all memoirs. See? Illiteracy is good for something (8)
(People Magazine) Misc Ellen to celebrate new season, by wearing a thong. Submitter thinks he speaks for everybody when he says "Please don't" (35)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Cool NBC plans to air "Letters to Santa -- A Muppets Christmas", presumably this December (21)
(Reuters) Obvious Lawsuit against Spielberg contends that "Disturbia" was a blatant ripoff of "Rear Window". Not sure how it took a year for someone to notice (40)
(Labspaces.net) Obvious The Daily Show apparently isn't as effective as an actual news show in imparting information about a political figure (108)
(Contact Music) Unlikely In perhaps the biggest casting stretch since Denise Richards played a nuclear physicist in a James Bond movie, Jessica Alba will play a mathematics genius in a film tentatively titled "Math Is Hard" (39)
(UGO) Cool Heroes Season 3 - First Hour Premiere Review (35)
(Contact Music) Obvious None of Seth Rogen's friends act their age. Amusing tag experiences a midlife crisis (22)
(Contact Music) PSA Etiquette watchdog Paris Hilton would like you to stop picking on the Jonas Brothers (47)
(Contact Music) Followup Judicial Dismissings of Lawsuit for Make Benefit Glorious Wallet of Sacha Baron Cohen (60)
(People Magazine) Ironic Things couldn't be better for unmarried spinster Jennifer Aniston. Angelina Pitt unimpressed (59)
(celebrityrush.com) Obvious Ashton Kutcher blows $750,000 gambling in Las Vegas (73)
(Canada.com) Stupid Russia attempts to ban South Park, presumably because its unrealistic that the children in that show don't drink vodka (96)
(London Times) Cool The story of The Clash, in their own words (52)
(AP) Cool Stephen Colbert's DNA to be shot into space. You'd be lucky to hit the headboard (31)
(News.com.au) Interesting Because the first step of a journey is the most important one, TV Guide takes a look at the top 10 TV pilots (52)
(Starpulse) Hero Patrick Swayze shows up for cancer telethon despite having terminal pancreatic cancer. Magic Johnson unavailable for comment (30)
(AFP) Stupid SURPRISE: Britney Spears fails to surprise with her four-sentence performance at the MTV Video Music Awards (79)
(Wired) Spiffy Sept. 8, 1966: Man boldly goes where no one has gone before (31)
(Onion AV Club) Interesting Eighteen films that turn viewers into voyeurs. Make it 19 if I can find a distributor for "My Neighbor Missy Never Shuts Her Blinds, Thank God" (20)
(AP) Dumbass VMA host Russell Brand, who was fired by MTV the day after 9/11 due to showing up to work dressed as Osama Bin Laden, reminds MTV and viewers of what a class act he is (161)

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