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Sun August 19, 2007
(Some Guy) Spiffy Rose McGowan may be sexing up the galaxy in Robert Rodriguez's "Barbarella" (16)
(Some Guy) Obvious Amy Winehouse's mum thinks she'll wind up dead very soon because of her addictions. Well, I guess that's better than winding up looking like her mum. (pic) (38)
Daily Mail Sad 40-ish pop stars who are still hot, step forward. Whoa, not so fast, Kylie Minogue (25)
USA Today Cool Superbad beats expectations at the box office. Producers are so excited, they have to hide it under their belt. That way they can hide it and it feels good (44)
(JustPressPlay.net) Interesting "The Lost Boys 2" getting a theatrical release? (16)
(Some Guy) Interesting Beam him up: James McAvoy cast as new Mr. Scott (40)
AP Interesting Sen. Patrick Leahy will appear in new Batman movie. Thank god he won't be wearing tights (11)
Lancashire Evening Post Interesting Star Wars duo voted movie couple with most unconvincing on-screen chemistry (56)
Yahoo Cool J.K. Rowling reportedly setting her sights on crime/mystery for her next novel (36)
(Some Gunslinger) Cool Stephen King confirms The Dark Tower movie. Who's doing it? The writers of ABC's "Lost" (90)
(Bitten and Bound) Amusing Cop says he won't give Vida Guerra a ticket... if she lets him see her naked (29)
(Zap2It) Sad Disney's High School Musical 2 sets the all-time basic cable viewing record, dethroning ESPN and the NFL (48)

Sat August 18, 2007
(Some Guy) Cool Holy COW* Batman, Here's a whole bunch of new pictures from The Dark Knight (74)
London Times Interesting Violent parent made Steve Martin funny. "Parenthood" made Steve Martin unfunny (23)
(Some Liar) Amusing A short selection of downloadable ringtones courtesy of Henry Rollins, including "Hey, asshole, pick up your farking phone or I'll smash you upside the head with it"(Obviously Not safe for work language) (32)
AFP Interesting Jack Kerouac's "Hookers and blow in my Winnabego" edition to be released (13)
(NY Times) Obvious It's simply stunning that parents of children who participated in a no-supervision child reality show are suggesting that their children were injured due to a lack of supervision (98)
Starpulse Obvious American Idol winner, yeah, what'shername, signs record deal and will release first single later this month; fade away into obscurity (27)
(aceshowbiz.com) Obvious CBS expected to pick up LL Cool J's show "The Man." Don't call it a comeback, it'll be canceled within a year (11)
Detroit News Silly Reprint of 1967 Batgirl cover accused of being sexist. Barbarella rolls eyes (81)
CBS 2 Lost Angeles Followup Coroner rules that Ving Rhames' dogs did not kill his caretaker... they just chewed on him a bit (12)
TechnologyReview Dumbass Would all the aging hipsters who are not douchebags please step forward. Not so fast Bono (26)

Fri August 17, 2007
(Broadcastingcable) Hero Daily Show goes from the green screen to the green zone. Please be careful, guys (34)
Aint-It-Cool-News Cool "Entourage" and "Flight of the Conchords" renewed for 2008. Hug it out biatches (46)
(Some Guy) Silly "Harold & Kumar 2" trailer arrives. It's gonna be just like "Eurotrip" except it's not gonna suck (68)
(E!) Unlikely There should be a prize for kickass photoshop skills: Allure photos from the latest trainwreck Britney interview, and she's skinny and hot (43)
YouTube Video Remember the beach dancing breakfast cereal characters? They’re baaaaaaack. This time as rhythmic gymnasts dancing to the sounds of Frank Stallone (11)
IMDB Interesting "Super Troopers 2," not shenanigans? (42)
Starpulse Interesting First pirated copy of "The Simpsons Movie" traced to Australia. What'd you expect from the country that produced Arnold Schwarzenegger? (54)
(Some Guy) Cool Jessica Biel has a same-sex crush on Jennifer Aniston (67)
(Some Guy) Dumbass Jessica Simpson breaks her nose after accidentally hitting herself in the face with a gun (44)
LA Times Interesting Action star Steven Seagal wants FBI apology, claiming agency investigation hurt his career. No, Steven. That's on you, babe (23)
(Some Jedi) Interesting "George Lucas Land" rumored for Disney theme park. Look for Flannel Flume, Who Shot First? and free beard rides. You submitted this with a better headline, but we added CGI (37)
(Some Guy) Amusing Andy Samberg, talking about the time he tried to urinate out of a hotel window: "Suddenly, I felt this hand on my shoulder. It was The Rock" (43)
ABC News Sad The Beach Boys say they're not too old to rock and roll -- even though they have only one original member left, and he's the least talented one (52)
(Some Guy) Plug How these 11 nerds managed to score with the opposite sex is a mystery. (Sponsored Link) (45)
Reuters Ironic Prince of Darkness sets up Christian center (44)
(ET Online) Interesting Tracy Morgan gets community service and fine for DUI, blames sneaky Taiwanese tranny who stole his watch (18)
(Some Guy) Dumbass When you send your driver out to pick up some condoms for you, the night must be going pretty well. Just ask Criss Angel (53)
AFP Obvious Amy Winehouse cancels concerts for meth reasons. I mean, health reasons (38)
Yahoo Cool Steve McQueen's 1963 Ferrari Berlinetta Lusso fetches a cool $2.3 million at auction. Really, really want (17)
(VGB) Interesting MTV to invest over $500 million in video games. What could possibly go right? (62)
Yahoo Stupid Hollywood to ruin another classic film: Bruce Lee's "Enter the Dragon" to be remade (70)
(Cinematical) Interesting Seven teen sex comedies that DON'T suck (71)
The Sun Spiffy Seal officially has the best job in the whole world: Heidi Klum's butt-checker. The Sun is there (41)

Thu August 16, 2007
Yahoo Stupid R. Kelly's "Trapped in the Closet" gets even longer, and even more batschiat crazy (37)
(U. of Washington) Followup Disney to University of Washington: Retract news release on research on effects of "Baby Einstein" videos. UW President: Suck it (114)
Yahoo Interesting Filming delayed for new season of "24," because the writers need to catch up with plotlines and THERE'S NOT ENOUGH TIME (40)
Starpulse Interesting Matt Damon says Bond/Bourne comparisons are inappropriate, since Bond is a douche stuck in the 1960s (64)
ABC News Stupid Not news: Star Jones explains why she lied about the gastric bypass surgery that helped her lose all that weight. Farkin News: Who keeps asking her to do interviews? (21)
News.com.au Dumbass 17 year-old who was the naked baby on the cover of Nirvana album is now a "bit embarrassed". So, naturally, he does a lot of interviews for money in case anyone didn't know it was him (51)
CNN Unlikely Boomers in the media claim that their sagging, wrinkled, counterparts in Hollywood are still sexy (156)
NYPost Interesting List of unclaimed cash in Florida includes Justin Timberlake's Disney paycheck, Celine Dion's DirectTV deposit, and Britney Spears' endorsement checks for Cheetos, Red Bull and Marlboro Lights (3)
BBC Silly And once again, a U.S. network prepares to screw up a perfectly good UK TV show (40)
(Some Guy) Silly Katie Holmes may be set to fly her invisible DC-9 into volcano to save the universe (48)
Starpulse Obvious The Sci-Fi Channel learns that buzz from the Internet and comic-book geeks do not equal ratings (95)
(Cape Cod Times) Amusing Cape Cod author falsely claims that his book was a Oprah's Book Club selection (8)
iWon Sad Thirty years ago, Elvis Presley became the butt of jokes forever (106)
Telegraph Strange The network that brought you "Designer Vaginas" and "World's Biggest Penis" will entertain you this fall with their new television program, "Drug Binge TV" (52)
This Is Local London Strange The problem with celebrities flying commercial jets to reduce their carbon footprints is that regular people get to see how weird they are. Today's example: Madonna shooting herself up with vitamins mid-flight (44)
Yahoo Misc Jimmy Fallon prepares for his first divorce (26)
USA Today Cool One more day until "High School Musical 2" hits the airwaves. Like, ohmigod, I'm so excited (33)
NCBuy Weird Mary-Kate Olsen to kiss Ben Kingsley in next film, hopes to catch whatever it is that helped Gandhi stay thin (18)
Houston Chronicle PSA Elvis = totally not a racist (12)
(aceshowbiz.com) Stupid In an effort to shield their daughter from the public's eye, TomKat sign up Suri Cruise as the new face of Baby GAP (16)
Starpulse Cool Richard Belzer's character Detective John Munch has now appeared in 10 different TV shows (57)

Wed August 15, 2007
Guardian.com Interesting Sylvia Plath's unseen art found in attic, will be published for the first time this October. First printings are already hot out of the oven (27)
(Some Guy) Spiffy Lindsay Lohan looks soberiffic as she leaves her Utah rehab facility to huff fumes at the spray-on tanning salon. You'd hit it like a Mormon polygamist (80)
(MSN) Dumbass Russell Crowe to play villain in new "Star Trek" movie? KHAAAAAAAANNN (53)
ABC Action News Asinine Lou Diamond Phillps still makes over $600k a year (60)
NYPost Dumbass Billy Crystal threatens to start late night talk show. In other news, Billy Crystal is still alive (13)
(Some Guy) Dumbass ♪♫ Sharon Stone parks in the handicapped spaces ♪♫ While handicapped people ♪♫ Make handicapped faces ♪♫ (51)
MSNBC Dumbass It appears that Britney Spears is angling for Fark's much-coveted "Mother of the Year" award (51)
(Some guy) Amusing According to OK Magazine, Britney's new lover is former assistant, Shannon Funk. Something stinks about this story (19)
UPI Scary Peter Sarsgaard, come on down. You're the next contestant to contract Lyme disease (20)
Starpulse Dumbass Courtney Love claims her smaller figure is a result of fasting/colonics. It has nothing to do with blow binges. Her words for the actresses that say they credit their weight loss to broccoli and fish? "You liars. You bulimic liars" (17)
(Gamespot.com) Interesting One in 10 MMORPG players get lucky with each other... if you consider that lucky (46)
The Register Amusing Sony confirms that the Playstation Home network will be a nanny state run by PC Nazis (26)
Yahoo Interesting Matt Damon to lend voice for PBS show "Arthur," hopes to live down disastrous "Team America" performance (26)
News.com.au Strange Straight from the "on-screen hook-ups you never thought you'd see" pile: Michelle Tanner and Gandhi (16)
(Some Guy) Interesting From the "this would have been really hot in 1998" files: Britney Spears' recent sex partners include her female assistant and Jenna Jameson (20)
London Times Unlikely 10 reasons why Paris Hilton is a genius businesswoman... no, seriously (30)
(Some Guy) Cool Not news: you're photographed giving a BJ to your boyfriend, News: on a multi-million dollar yacht, Fark: you're Anne Hathaway (with Not safe for work-ish pics) (83)
(Some Guy) Spiffy Someone snuck a "Deathly Hallows" spoiler in the movie version of "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire" (w/ pic) (35)
Starpulse Hero While 50 Cent and Kanye West argue over whose album will sell more when they're released, in walks Kenny Chesney, who says, "I'm-a buss a cap in both yo asses" (36)
(Some Guy) Scary Creepy-ass Rob Zombie "Halloween" movie site, with trailer and some bugs running across my screen, screw this, man (31)
Local6 Hero Judge instructs his jury not to watch Nancy Grace (31)
MSNBC Interesting "I know there's deep inside (me) some lazy hippie who'd be perfectly happy to lay on the couch, smoke weed and watch `The Simpsons' all day." Tony Bourdain, get out of my head (37)
Maxim Silly Twelve hot women and the hideous men they love. They're rich, you fool, don't get your hopes up like that (42)
(mmoabc.com) Spiffy The 30 Defining Moments In Gaming (54)
(Some Guy) Scary Jenna Jameson looking like a Simpson character. She didn't need to use "The Simpsomaker" (bikini pics) (34)
(Zap2It) Cool Good news ladies, Lou Diamond Phillips is officially back on the market (12)
The Sun Ironic They tried to make Amy Winehouse go to rehab. She said "Yes, yes, yes." (56)
(Some Guy) Silly Howard Stern to remake "Porky's." Miss Ballbricker expected to ride the Sybian (44)

Tue August 14, 2007
(Some Guitar Hero) Stupid Completely batshiat insane Metallica sues video game companies for legally putting their music in their upcoming games. Dave Mustaine glad, once again, not to be involved (82)
WNBC Sick If you're into child porn, it's probably not a good idea to bring your computer in for repairs. If you're a "Law and Order: SVU" actor, that makes it even weirder (210)
(iF Magazine) Cool Nichelle Nichols joins the cast of "Heroes" as the mother of a new character in the second season. Insert your favorite "Star Trek"-related joke here (33)
Starpulse Dumbass Jessica Simpson is planning on adopting a Mexican orphan because daddy's having trouble getting her pregnant (49)
Yahoo Asinine "Today" show will soon only be 20 hours shy of its namesake (21)
Yahoo Followup Imus settles and may be preparing a comeback. Possible new radio-show titles include: "Ain't No Thang but a Chicken Wang" and "NappyHeadedHoSayWhat?" (113)
Yahoo Spiffy Joe Mantegna joins the cast of "Criminal Minds." Not bad for a four time Super Bowl champion (11)
The Sun Dumbass Mel B’s new husband is wanted by police after he bludgeoned a duck to death. The Sun is there (20)
(aceshowbiz.com) Sad First Jessica Alba may have herpes, now Justin Timberlake asks Jessica Biel to move in with him. Jessica trifecta in play (44)
Reuters Amusing "American Idol"-inspired musical closes one day after officially opening off Broadway. "My advice would be if you want to pursue a career in the music business, don't" (12)
(Some Guy) Cool Six actors who have no business being an action hero. Seriously? Whoa (65)
St. Pete Times Misc "Madden 08" hits stores today. Improvements this year include greatly-expanded product placement (105)
(aceshowbiz.com) Interesting LucasFilm has six titles in consideration for "Indiana Jones 4" (93)
Reuters Weird Rights to air Miss America pageant for the next three years purchased by... The Learning Channel? (33)
CBS 2 Lost Angeles Dumbass Actress Tawny Kitaen sued her former live-in boyfriend, alleging he cheated her out of more than $3 million in assets. In other news, Tawny Kitaen had $3 million in assets (41)

Mon August 13, 2007
IOL Interesting The largest exhibit of Elvis memorabilia opened today... in Berlin. Apparently, black velvet paintings of the King do not enjoy American trailer park exclusivity (5)
(Some Guy) Silly Laura Dern to return for "Jurassic Park IV," fighting gun-toting dinosaurs trained by the government. Wait, what? (65)
(Some Guy) Spiffy "Sesame Street" started 38th season Monday, with guest stars Tina Fey, Brian Williams and CGI giant squid. Mr. Hooper still dead (155)
(TheSequitur.com) Amusing A review of Comedy Central's Flava Flav roast (73)
Mercury News Obvious Gossip columnists at a loss for words after no one in Hollywood gets drunk, arrested, or wrecks their car this past weekend (11)
AZCentral Dumbass Avril Lavigne says she likes to run around naked when she's drunk. At least, that's what I thought I heard between her shouting "PAY ATTENTION TO ME" and "PLEASE BUY MY ALBUM" (55)
(Cuzoogle) Obvious The seven: Hottest women of 80s movies (safe for work) (108)
NCBuy Spiffy New stamp to honor Jimmy Stewart. Well... well, I'll tell ya what that is. That's just fantastic, it's, uh, it's an honor, is what it is (29)
(Comic Book Resources) Sad Comic-book geek flags at half-mast as Mike Wieringo goes on to that great bullpen in the sky (17)
AZCentral Obvious Matt Damon believes that "bad choices" are what killed Ben Affleck's career. Meanwhile, Ben desperately hoping Jason Bourne has a sidekick in the next film (68)
ABC News Spiffy Don Imus being courted for a return to radio. "He's very much like Jesus. He's coming back and boy is he PO'd." (31)
(firstshowing.net) Cool George A. Romero releases stills from his new zombie movie, "Diary of the Dead" (123)
(NY Times) Cool Mark Mothersbaugh's new kids' TV show "Yo Gabba Gabba" debuts on the 20th (29)
(Some Cesar Nero) Sad "Doctor Who" Series 4 filming delayed because of huge fire on set (32)
(Some Guy) Amusing "Don’t call us, we’ll call you." K-Fed goes to movie set to start on new movie, only to find out he was cut from the cast (25)
(Metro.co.uk) PSA Gaming addiction support groups want warning labels on MMORPGS and rehab centers. Submitter would come up with a wittier headline but needs to get back to grinding (29)
(Some Guy) Cool Remember how I told you there would never be a director's cut of "Commando" on DVD? I lied (48)
Starpulse Obvious NBC wants you to see their 30-second promo for "Resident Evil: Extinction" tonight, so they put together a "'Heroes' cast favorites" special to get you to watch it (32)
LA Times Obvious "Rush Hour 3" tops at the box office. Now Chris Tucker can finally take a long-deserved break from his acting career (30)
(thinkfashion.com) Sad Jessica Alba may have caught herpes from Derek Jeter. You still have no chance with her (76)
IGN Cool Director announced for G.I. Joe live-action film. Snake-Eyes left speechless (43)
Daily Mail Unlikely Your (old) dream has been fulfilled: Britney Spears is hot with hair and toned abs (59)
Lancashire Evening Post Spiffy Man attempting to set world record for the number of live Elvis Presley tribute performances in one day (26)
(tPC) Obvious Fleshdance? Jennifer Beals' lesbian sex scenes in "The L Word"' turn her on. What a feeling (15)
(Cracked.com) Amusing Five unintentionally hilarious movie sex acts. In spite of it skipping "Showgirls" altogether, not a shabby list (NSFW) (30)
(Some Guy) Obvious "Monty Python's Flying Circus" named the most influential comedy series in British broadcasting history, slightly edging out "Benny Hill" and the British knockoff of "The Office" (80)
(NS4W.ORG) Interesting Kate Winslet looks absolutely stunning in this photoshoot (45)
(Some Guy) Obvious Coldplay's Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow announce plans to adopt baby. Hard to believe there isn't enough whining and crying in that house already (19)



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