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Mon May 28, 2012
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(The Hollywood Reporter) Cool Upcoming CBGB movie is assembling a pretty cool cast. Bonus: Estelle Costanza  (hollywoodreporter.com) (10)
(Short List) Stupid Lifetime developing a new series based on Clarice Starling who they're planning to turn into a victim of rape, incest and cyber-bullying  (shortlist.com) (23)
(News.com.au) Amusing If you are beaten up by Justin Bieber and admit to it, doesn't that make you the world's biggest marshmallow?  (news.com.au) (52)
(Independent) Spiffy Ridley Scott is such a sci-fi badass he was scheduled to design the Daleks but he was busy that week  (independent.co.uk) (18)
(Gawker) Hero For this Memorial Day, 10 classic films to remind you that war is hell  (gawker.com) (54)
(YouTube) Video Happy 68th birthday to Billy Vera and thanks for the best slow dance song ever  (youtube.com) (24)
(Law and Order and Food) Amusing In the criminal justice system, takeout is considered especially tasty. In New York City, the detectives who investigate these dishes are members of an elite squad known as the Special Tasters Unit. These are their stories. *DOINK DOINK*  (law-order-food.tumblr.com) (12)
(Den Of Geek) Interesting Will Men In Black 3's worldwide box office success lead to Ghostbusters 3 after all?  (denofgeek.com) (40)
(Buzzfeed) Florida Former member of LFO spends his free time hanging outside of abortion clinics, either praying or taking pictures of women who visit and Tweeting about it  (buzzfeed.com) (110)


Sun May 27, 2012
(Fox News) Sad Michele Rodriguez fires up the knee-sharpener   (entertainment.blogs.foxnews.com) (127)
(Some Guy) Silly Cupcake returns for Star Trek 2, Worf doesn't get the callback  (comicbookmovie.com) (55)
(YouTube) Cool This week's SHMHC will push you, pull you, and destroy you  (youtube.com) (19)
(Blastr) Silly Hoff disses Samuel L. Jackson, says he's the best Fury ever. Begun the Nicks Fury War has. (Bonus: "Dick Fury")  (blastr.com) (58)
(YouTube) Cool A happy 90th birthday to Christopher Lee  (youtube.com) (40)
(Deadline) Followup The Avengers sets a new record even while slipping to #2, behind the ridiculously under-performing Men in Black III. I'm not saying it's aliens, but...it's aliens  (deadline.com) (150)
(TMZ) Dumbass Amanda Bynes pulls a third DUI and hit-and-run, with the suspect identifying her from a mugshot taken four days earlier for the same crime  (tmz.com) (121)
(HitFix) Cool They don't make them like this anymore: Fifteen unexpected summer movie blockbusters. Well, they still make them like Blair Witch Project, but that was a fluke  (hitfix.com) (78)
(Orange County Register) Spiffy German model shows up on the red carpet at the premier of "Men In Black III" wearing a dress made out of VHS tape. "She also happens to be the owner of some of the most plastic looking breasts we've ever seen"  (ocregister.com) (61)
(Some Guy) Florida Unnamed cable reality show trolling Craigslist for South Floridians who have "atypical relationship with food." The things people will do for an Emmy  (blogs.browardpalmbeach.com) (15)
(Time) Followup TIME: "We liked Star Wars before it was cool"  (entertainment.time.com) (87)


Sat May 26, 2012
(SeattlePI) Interesting Hottest movie sex scenes. Over 70 scenes designed to help viewers forget the rest of the movie (w/ SFW pics, slideshow)  (blog.seattlepi.com) (162)
(On The Media) Interesting A look back at the Max Headroom TV series, which saw 20 minutes into the future and then some  (onthemedia.org) (94)
(Entertainment Weekly) Fail Entertainment Weekly's readers have voted for the best Saturday Night Live host of the past season, and it proves one thing: we should not let them vote in the presidential election  (popwatch.ew.com) (39)
(BBC) Followup I carry a torch. Torches are cool  (bbc.co.uk) (95)
(Entertainment Weekly) Followup Eminem now working on a new solo record that threatens to be as massive as Marilyn Manson's comeback album  (music-mix.ew.com) (53)
(Some Guy) Interesting 15 celebrities who are older than you thought...Jennifer Tilly is 53?  (guyism.com) (115)
(Daily Mail) Followup American Idol champion to undergo kidney surgery. Once again, another musical career starts after being influenced by the stones  (dailymail.co.uk) (8)
(USA Today) Unlikely Sixty-four-year-old Gregg Allman on his soon to be seventh bride, 40 years his junior: "This time, I really am in love"  (content.usatoday.com) (62)


Fri May 25, 2012
(Forbes) Fail Skrillex renders Forbes' Top 100 Most Powerful Celebrities list invalid  (forbes.com) (107)
(Gawker) Spiffy Not news: Bill Murray turns down fan's request for autograph. Fark: Bill Murray agrees to star in his short film instead  (gawker.com) (45)
(News.com.au) Obvious STOP THE PRESSES: Black Eyed Peas frontman Will.i.am admits he can't sing  (news.com.au) (32)
(USA Today) Spiffy Heidi Klum auctions off a back rub for AIDS research. Do I hear $75,000? YUUUP  (content.usatoday.com) (51)
(Spinner) Unlikely "Bob Dylan and Adam Sandler -- Celebrity Doppelgangers?" If you have glaucoma, yes  (spinner.com) (26)
(New Musical Express) Interesting Bridge from Red Hot Chili Peppers' "Under The Bridge" located in MacArthur Park. In other news, someone left a cake out in the rain  (nme.com) (58)
(Some Guy) Dumbass Britney Spears has to leave set of X-Factor after hearing someone other than herself butcher her song  (mega949.com) (40)
(Daily Mail) Scary Meg Ryan suddenly rockets to the top of the leader board for the most frightening arms in Hollywood  (dailymail.co.uk) (61)
(MLive.com) Obvious Childrens' Art Festival expected to draw hundreds of people. Mostly with stick bodies, big heads and scribble hair  (mlive.com) (11)
(TMZ) Interesting Wilmer Valderrama sued by neighbor for having loud parties, nailing every hot young starlet he can find  (tmz.com) (53)
(The Sun) Scary Dark Side of Kaboom  (thesun.co.uk) (31)
(Some Guy) Stupid In a move that will make you want to vomit split pea soup, The Exorcist is slated to be remade as a TV mini-series   (theclicker.today.msnbc.msn.com) (28)
(Fox News) Scary Deadliest Catch deck boss discovers that there's something even deadlier that you can catch  (foxnews.com) (40)
(TMZ) Dumbass Jenna Jameson blew a high number; also: gets DUI  (tmz.com) (55)
(Huffington Post) Followup The cover model for Blink 182's Enema of the State looked hot. Then she married Jesse James, got hooked on drugs, and now looks like a strung-out grandmother and poster child for poor decisions  (huffingtonpost.com) (164)
(Gawker) Strange Nicole Kidman will semi-erotically pee on Zac Efron in actual scene from actual movie that is real  (gawker.com) (76)
(FilmDrunk) Scary We haven't heard much from Matthew Fox since "Lost" ended. Let's check in and see how he's.....SWEET MERCIFUL GOD IN HEAVEN ABOVE, KILL IT WITH FIRE  (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) (56)


Thu May 24, 2012
(Yahoo) Asinine What's worse than proposing on live TV in front of millions? Being a big enough douche to advertise the jeweler during your proposal. "And, with the help of David Webb Jewelry, I have a way to make this fun last forever"  (music.yahoo.com) (60)
(Some Doc) Interesting Christopher Eccleston on his decision to E-VAC-U-ATE the role of Doctor Who  (digitalspy.co.uk) (220)
(FilmDrunk) Followup Woman who received brain injuries from "Transformers 3" gets $18.5 million. Now would be a good time for a class-action lawsuit  (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) (57)
(Paste Magazine) Interesting Need an excuse to waste more of your time online? Paste presents the 50 best movies on Netflix Instant  (pastemagazine.com) (235)
(Some Guy) Amusing A vintage look back at the long lost era of Vaudeville and burlesque performers. Midgets were exploited during the making of these photos  (awesome-robo.com) (56)
(Womc.com) Weird Amy Winehouse, Whitney Houston, Robin Gibb. Is Glee Predicting Musicians' Deaths Like A "Musical Nostradamus?"  (womc.cbslocal.com) (46)
(The Atlantic) Spiffy Happy 40th to ****, ****, FARK, ****, **********, ************, and ****  (theatlantic.com) (39)
(Retrospace) Amusing Wha - - -?  (my-retrospace.blogspot.com) (29)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Obvious Science Channel buys rights to air Fringe re-runs. And now you know why there's going to be a fifth season  (hollywoodreporter.com) (26)
(Onion AV Club) Obvious Nicolas Cage has made one good film in his career, and that movie is Vampire's Kiss  (avclub.com) (132)
(People Magazine) Cool Phillip Phillips winner winner  (people.com) (42)
(New York Daily News) Fail A&E cancels "Dog the Bounty Hunter" after eight seasons, or 56 in human years  (nydailynews.com) (64)
(Celebitchy) Sappy Megan Fox, now 5 months pregnant, is expecting a girl. Publicist confirms she's excited, nervous, all thumbs  (celebitchy.com) (34)
(TMZ) Interesting Roy of Siegfried and Roy is accused of mauling his male therapists like he was a tiger and the therapists were Roy  (tmz.com) (24)
(Hartford Courant) Interesting If Jennifer Lopez quits Idol, Chaka Khan says she would take her place. Chaka Khan? Chaka Khan? Chaka Khan?  (courant.com) (45)
(SameSame) Cool Cate Blanchett to play lead in classic lesbian love story. In related news, bunk futures have just reached an all time high  (samesame.com.au) (27)
(Topless Robot) Silly The twenty lamest-looking villains from all of Star Trek. Pretty accurate list, but it's missing the Borg and Suliban  (toplessrobot.com) (158)
(Den Of Geek) Interesting NBC's memo to the cast of Community after Dan Harmon's 'departure' is leaked. They will wish it hadn't been. It, er, includes the scripted answers the cast should give to difficult questions  (denofgeek.com) (53)
(Radar Magazine) Fail Well I'm just shocked to learn Levi Johnston is broke and living with his mom  (radaronline.com) (72)
(Onion AV Club) Fail 60s Paul McCartney versus 80s Paul McCartney: an examination of the only bad thing McCartney did, Give My Regards to Broad Street  (avclub.com) (81)
(HitFix) Cool Gary Oldman will create Robocop in the upcoming remake  (hitfix.com) (61)
(Stuff.co.nz) Weird Victoria Beckham likes to get facials from New Zealand sheep placentas  (stuff.co.nz) (79)


Wed May 23, 2012
(Deadline) Followup Hip Hop Squares sets new ratings record for MTV 2. No, the other way  (deadline.com) (34)
(Deadline) Stupid G.I. Joe: Retaliation pushed back to 3/2013. Apparently the other half of the battle is 'post production 3D conversion'  (deadline.com) (59)
(Nerve) Amusing Ridiculous Tips for a Miserable Sex Life: May 2012 Cosmo's summer tips, Men's Health's sex-boosting foods, and so much more  (nerve.com) (55)
(St. Petersburg Times) Amusing Duckie, Andie and Blane renew Pretty in Pink rivalry on Twitter  (tampabay.com) (33)
(Houston Chronicle) Obvious "The Big Bang Theory" actor Jim Parsons reveals that he has no interest in bazingas  (blog.chron.com) (220)
(610 WIOD) Silly 'You're Dreadful' says Anderson Cooper as he kicked "Human Barbie" off his show, reducing his total audience in half  (610wiod.com) (80)
(YouTube) Video Bill Murray Gives a Guided Tour Of Moonrise Kingdom  (youtube.com) (33)
(Neatorama) Interesting Here's something to get the Whedonites all fired up: "Does Firefly Take Place In The Same Universe As Prometheus?"  (neatorama.com) (87)
(Big 1059) Cool Rolling Stones said to be honored, confused to hit 10 million Facebook fans, whatever those are  (big1059.com) (8)
(Excite) Dumbass Just when you thought The Beef couldn't sound any douchier, "I think I've become less corporate"  (apnews.excite.com) (30)
(Some Guy) Silly The biggest movie marketing failures. Meesa no like lollipops no more  (smosh.com) (14)
(Daily Stab) Interesting Snooki reveals there's a tiny penis growing inside her  (dailystab.com) (16)
(Den Of Geek) Interesting The evolution of videogames, as seen in 28 movie cameos  (denofgeek.com) (37)
(The Atlantic) Obvious "SNL needs to update itself and let go of old television parodies"  (theatlantic.com) (71)
(MTV) Interesting Kanye West, Beyonce lead BET award nominations. Both are nominated for Video of the Year if not OF ALL TIME  (mtv.com) (5)
(Breitbart.com) Asinine Why does SNL refuse to make jokes about the fact that Obama was born in Kenya?  (breitbart.com) (58)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Unlikely ALF's creator thinks he needs to be back, and not just in Pog form  (hollywoodreporter.com) (30)
(The Atlantic) Weird Seven-year-old girl is Japan's newest pop idol, starring in music, movies, and numerous commercials. Jesus  (theatlantic.com) (27)
(Bitten and Bound) Fail For the first time in the history of Idol, a finalist wimped out. The 16-year-old is too young to know about self fulfilling prophesies but she'll find out tonight. #hescoresshebombs   (bittenandbound.com) (38)
(Deadspin) Spiffy Once again, never underestimate the moves of an NFL player on DWTS  (deadspin.com) (45)
(Some Guy) Obvious Jeff Dunham's show in Savannah will be filmed for comedy special, contain no actual comedy  (mega949.com) (71)
(Wikipedia) Interesting Today's "ye gods, we're old" moment: Duff is 50  (en.wikipedia.org) (60)
(WESH Orlando) Florida Lead roles in upcoming Casey Anthony movie cast, unfortunately not into Hell  (wesh.com) (50)
(Daily Mail) Weird Ever seen a cat in stripper shoes?  (dailymail.co.uk) (35)
(Huffington Post) Spiffy I pity the fool who forgot to wish Mr. T a happy 60th birthday on Monday  (huffingtonpost.com) (25)
(TMZ) Weird Corey Feldman has 6 foot 300-pound woman that he met through Michael Jackson arrested for violating a restraining order...while living in his house  (tmz.com) (36)
(TMZ) Sad Ex-James Bond actor is pissed the new 007 sold out and replaced the signature martini with beer. Well duh. You must be some kind of idiot to endorse Heineken without some serious kickbacks  (tmz.com) (113)
(Rolling Stone) Caption Caption what Jack White is writing on this dude's arm  (rollingstone.com) (66)
(YouTube) Video The first trailer for "The Great Gatsby", in all its Art Deco glory  (youtube.com) (130)
(io9) Silly Remember how you said Hollywood has run out of ideas? Grant Morrison and Barry Sonnenfeld are teaming up to bring you Dinosaurs Vs Aliens. Suddenly that Gilligan's Island reboot doesn't seem so bad does it?  (io9.com) (57)
(New York Daily News) Scary Actor Michael McKean in critical condition after being struck by car while crossing street. No word if car was doing 11  (nydailynews.com) (93)


Tue May 22, 2012
(Perez Hilton) Video Glee star Naya Rivera's pole-dancing video, "leaked." By leaked we mean: by a guest on last week's episode, just before she graduates on the show, and from Spike TV, five years ago. May be Not safe for work. Cheerio  (perezhilton.com) (60)
(Warming Glow) Hero One ten-year-old's vision: "Hulk no like Kardashians. Hulk bugged by Kardashians. HULK SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH KARDASHIANS"  (warmingglow.uproxx.com) (38)
(Some Guy) Obvious Let's see how long it took Warner Bros. to create their new Dark Knight Rises poster  (25.media.tumblr.com) (123)
(Slate) Stupid Yes, somebody decided to fact check "Battleship"  (slate.com) (111)
(Comedy Central) Video What's better than $24k? Turning it into $48k on one hand of blackjack  (tosh.comedycentral.com) (38)
(Huffington Post) Obvious "Sex is a beautiful and magical thing," says Miley Cyrus. "Not that I've ever had sex," she continued with a sidelong glance at her father, seen here polishing his favorite shotgun  (huffingtonpost.com) (128)
(E! Online) Sad Howard Stern makes a little boy cry. This is what Parents' Television Council warned us about  (eonline.com) (97)
(Bitten and Bound) Obvious ABC: Can't get enough of Good Morning America? Okay then, how about Good Afternoon America?  (bittenandbound.com) (31)
(KARE 11) Obvious You're not going to believe this, but people are figuring out that paying $100/month for crappy reality TV shows isn't worth it  (kare11.com) (238)
(HitFix) Fail Men in Black 3 isn't a disaster, but will anyone remember it after Memorial Day weekend?  (hitfix.com) (55)
(Some Guy) Amusing Vince McMahon figures out the reason WWE Films aren't doing so well; there just aren't enough three-foot penises on display  (411mania.com) (74)
(USA Today) Silly "Hollywood Squares" reborn as "Hip Hop Squares." Yo, I'll take hologram Tupac in the center square  (content.usatoday.com) (21)
(HitFix) Cool Edward Norton explains why he still hasn't seen The Avengers  (hitfix.com) (98)
(Yahoo) Obvious Mila Kunis, Bar Raefeli and a sharp kneed drag queen take top spots at 2012 Maxim Top 100  (omg.yahoo.com) (60)
(TMZ) Fail Snooki announces she won't take part in season six of Jersey Shore. That show has had six seasons? Really?  (tmz.com) (23)
(The Daily Beast) Spiffy Alec Baldwin is set to tie to the knot with hottie yoga instructor who tweets about what a good kisser he is. Damn, it feels good to be a gangster  (thedailybeast.com) (29)
(Some Guy) Stupid The invading force in Red Dawn (already filmed) is changing (post-production) from Chinese troops to North Korean troops because Hollywood doesn't want to offend China  (infowars.com) (267)
(Deadline) Ironic Pixar's John Lasseter: "Traditional animation is still very important"  (deadline.com) (41)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Asinine Kardashian's 7th season premiere brings in some big ass ratings  (hollywoodreporter.com) (25)
(Coming Soon) Asinine George Lucas talks Indiana Jones 5. Which is obviously crazy talk considering the fourth one never happened  (comingsoon.net) (131)
(Rolling Stone) Interesting Rolling Stone readers pick their 10 best beards in rock. There's some stupidity on the list, but anyone who tries to argue with #1 is a fool  (rollingstone.com) (90)
(io9) Spiffy First video from the third season of The Walking Dead  (io9.com) (78)
(The Hollywood Reporter) Followup The first half of the final season of Breaking Bad will begin airing on July 15th and end sometime in September, meaning we'll have to wait an agonizing ten months for resolution  (hollywoodreporter.com) (58)


Mon May 21, 2012
(Some Guy) Interesting Will House finally kill himself? Can it be Lupus? Should the show have ended after season 5? It's the series finale of House, "Everybody Dies", at 8 PM on FOX. In the meantime, here's a list of the best episodes of the series  (blog.zap2it.com) (366)
(Celebitchy) Followup John Travolta Grope-O-Meter: 7  (celebitchy.com) (68)
(Gamma Squad) Amusing Here are all 68 lines of Rihanna's dialogue in Battleship, not quite enough to fill a novella, ella, ella  (gammasquad.uproxx.com) (48)
(E! Online) Obvious Weak weekend numbers for Battleship movie. "Hungry Hungry Hippos, The Movie" now on hold  (eonline.com) (171)
(Short List) Cool For all those who felt morally opposed to the pirated version, here's the actual Anchorman 2 trailer. Insert overly repeated Ron Burgandy quote  (shortlist.com) (61)
(Mediaite) Stupid Former Daily Show producer says that he made liberals angry because he let conservatives state their opinion and look human  (mediaite.com) (85)
(Celebslam) Amusing "Anyone chosen to screen test with Leonardo DiCaprio will have to play the scene in the nude." The smartest man in show business, ladies and gentlemen  (celebslam.celebuzz.com) (53)
(Celebslam) Asinine Kourtney Kardashian parks in handicapped spaces while handicapped people make handicapped faces  (celebslam.celebuzz.com) (74)
(Entertainment Weekly) Spiffy The twenty greatest season finales of all time  (ew.com) (243)
(Stylist) Amusing Good news: Scarlett Johansson joins Hitchcock hall of fame. Bad news: She bucks the trend by wearing underwear on-set  (stylist.co.uk) (45)
(Some Guy) Interesting Final episode of iCarly is being filmed this summer, for those of you who would like to have a seat over there... in the studio audience  (hlntv.com) (62)
(Daily Mail) Strange At the Billboard Music Awards, Miley Cyrus wore what appears to be...some random dude's sports jacket  (dailymail.co.uk) (52)
(Den Of Geek) Interesting The Dark Knight Rises, The Amazing Spider-Man, Prometheus: which blockbuster has given the most footage away in trailers? Turns out it's not actually Prometheus  (denofgeek.com) (33)
(Short List) Cool The Skyfall teaser trailer is everything a teaser trailer should be but without that damn Inception noise  (shortlist.com) (53)
(Yahoo) Stupid Billboard awards show honors Donna Summer, but cuts off tribute for commercials. Guess it wasn't the greatest song in the world  (music.yahoo.com) (17)
(Guardian) Amusing West Staines Ghetto to be renamed West Staines-on-Thames Ghetto. Respect  (guardian.co.uk) (38)
(TMZ) Ironic The Gospel of Tebow apparently cannot include photos with actresses  (tmz.com) (62)
(Some Guy) Amusing Sacha Baron Cohen nearly killed by a group of rock-wielding "Hasidic nutcases" in Israel. At least they didn't throw him down a well  (ottawacitizen.com) (158)

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