Dorner Kebab, and Kim Jong drops the big Un, and Chris Brown smashes his Porsche, but only because he loves it so much: some of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 2/10 - 2/16
Posted by Unfreakable at 2013-02-18 2:49:33 PM (6 comments) | Permalink
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2300 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Feb 2013 at 2:59 PM (1 year ago) | | share: more»
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Pretty good set of headlines this week. Well done, submitters.
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2013-02-10 to Sat 2013-02-16:
Fox attacks four-week-old baby. "Fair and Balanced" my ass
Men's friendships with women 'driven by sexual attraction' according to Dr. N. S. Sherlock of the Institute For the Study of the Forehead-Slappingly Obvious
Day 2: The situation has grown dire. Passengers have eaten the carved watermelon that once adorned the now-empty buffet table. Without leisure activities, factions have formed. The Indonesian room stewards have folded towels into improvised weapons
There's a good chance the next pope will be Canadian. Ehmen
Kim Jong drops the Big Un
Woman needs four organs to survive, still has one hand free
Interstate closed due to traffic yams
Crippled cruise ship Triumph finally docks in Mobile, Alabama. Upon realizing they were in Alabama, passengers demand to be put back out to sea
Woman marries man that killed her twin niwt reh dellik taht nam seirram namoW
Now sit ye lads and hear the lore, of the sea shanty singer killed by a falling door. His manager at his side was also doomed. Both of their lives, far too early were consumed. Aargh
Paterno family releases report that rips investigator Louis Freeh a new asshole, which Jerry Sandusky would like to see. NO THE REPORT
Alex Rodriguez confirms he will miss spring training. Yankees say it's an unusual move since he doesn't usually abandon the team until October
Runner's World asks: What makes a good rabbit? Subby would say long battery life, but she isn't sure that's what they meant
Last week: Porn star Ron Jeremy admitted to hospital. This week: Researchers announce breakthrough in bone generation technology. The nurses are STILL limping
Video game sales are dropping like cement shoes because gamers have discovered a thing called "real life" which includes neat skill trees such as talking, going outside, and being nice to strangers
Tiny mutation may have shaped modern humans, rise of Magneto
Chris Brown smashes his Porsche into a wall, but only because he loves it so much
Lady Gaga cancels her entire tour after doctors learn her hip was torn this way
Snoop Dogg Lion hit with $500k tax lien by the IRS. This is why you don't take tax advice from Willie Nelson
John Boehner saw a camera today, which indicates six more weeks of sequestration bickering
Hawaii state legislature kills bill that would legalize marijuana, says they're doing just fine with Meth and Spam
Canadian senator and John Travolta lookalike forced out of the Canadian senate to protect "the dignity" of the Canadian senate. In other news, the Canadian senate still has dignity
Four in ten Americans are now living paycheck to paycheck. The other six are still asking "What's a paycheck?"
John Deere 1Q up 22% on news that the unemployed have gone back to agrarian living
This slideshow of airlines that no longer exist will make you long for the days when beautiful Trans-World Airlines stewardesses would offer you some of their famed TWA Tea
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