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Pilot fatigue traced to dragging Walton and Lanier up and down the court, skier wins competition on one ski despite paperboy, and Madonna skips adoption in lieu of marriage: Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 3/4 - 3/10 
Posted by Unfreakable at 2012-03-13 3:56:47 PM (10 comments) | Permalink
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2558 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Mar 2012 at 4:33 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Nothing really new to add this week, just some good headlines. I used to keep this until Tuesday, but I think I'm gonna start publishing it on Monday. What do you think?

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2012-03-04 to Sat 2012-03-10:

img.fark.net  Underdog candidate Vladimir Putin wins surprise victory in Russia elections    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Researchers aim to fill zoos with extinct species brought back via cloning. DID NONE OF THESE PEOPLE SEE JURASSIC PARK?    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Autism walk cut 7,920 seconds short due to nearly 27,154 gallons of rain, man    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  The Melvins are selling their van, which features artwork by Kurt Cobain on the side. I CALL SHOTGUN    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Badass three-year-old escapes from daycare after scaling seven foot tall spiked fence, making plans for next year's conquest of K2    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Suspicious white powder found at two DC schools and a downtown hotel. Marion Barry offers to test it for free    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Scientists measure first antimatter "atom", remarking that it appears very much like a normal atom except for the tiny little goatee    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Los Angeles high school under lockdown after racially-motivated brawl involving thirty students that left four injured and two under arrest, or as we use to call it at my alma mater, "recess"    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Safety committee suggests neighbors meet gang members and drug dealers. Go talk to Lord Humungus, he seems reasonable    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Two women to go 100% natural without makeup, hair styling, shaving for 60 days to experience rejuvenation, confidence, celibacy    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  One in four pilots fight fatigue, having to drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes    img.fark.net


Sports:

img.fark.net  Skier wins World Cup race on a single ski after terrifying pursuit by tenacious paperboy    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  49-year-old pitcher Jamie Moyer continues MLB comeback, pitches two scoreless innings, tests positive for Centrum Silver    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Indiana's Jones to miss the rest of the regular season, plans to visit a museum in his free time    img.fark.net


Geek:

img.fark.net  New species of catshark found, so named because of its habit of vomiting at least twice a day    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  M.C. Escher-inspired labyrinth video game wins technical excellence award for M.C. Escher-inspired labyrinth video game wins technical excellence award for M.C. Escher-inspired labyrinth video game wins technical excellence award for ∞    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Teen smoking now in epidemic proportions. One in four high school students now smokes regularly, the other three just like to light up after having sex with their teacher    img.fark.net


Entertainment:

img.fark.net  Adele fears her English country mansion is haunted. This sounds an awful lot like the time Scooby and the gang helped Mama Cass out of that haunted candy factory mess    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Madonna, 53, considering marriage proposal from 24 year old boyfriend. Tells close friends that marriage is an easier process than just trying to adopt him    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Aaron Sorkin will deliver commencement speech at Syracuse University this Spring. The speech will be delivered during a walking tour through campus hallways and include a lengthy aside about a Gilbert and Sullivan musical    img.fark.net


Politics:

img.fark.net  For those whore counting, that's 26 advertisers Limbaugh has lost now    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Romney mocks Obama's focus on renewable energy, saying "you can't drive a car with a windmill on it." Especially when most of your car's roof space is already occupied by your dog    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Mitt Romney: "I like grits". I assume grits is an acronym for Gems, Religion, Ivy league schools, Topiary gardens and Sailing    img.fark.net


Business:

img.fark.net  Maaden awards $1.5 billion contract to Hyundai. BOOM    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  After three years, Lehman Brothers emerges from bankruptcy. Company hopes to now achieve delicate balance between business irresponsibility and corporate fraud    img.fark.net

img.fark.net  Toyota recalls 681,000 U.S. cars for various problems. This year the only thing Toyota can't recall is the last time they made a car without any defects    img.fark.net
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10 Comments   (+0 »)
   
 
2012-03-13 04:40:24 PM
While I like the 'Airplane' one, its the Sorkin or Lehman brothers ones for me.
 
2012-03-13 04:41:51 PM
In before "submitted with a better headline..."
 
2012-03-13 04:43:51 PM
Melvins, Cobain, SHOTGUN = Epic. Win.
 
2012-03-13 04:44:10 PM
Am I the only one who read that as Potato Fatigue?
 
2012-03-13 04:47:00 PM

gwowen: While I like the 'Airplane' one, its the Sorkin or Lehman brothers ones for me.


Yeah, I liked both of those a lot as well, the rest of the headline was too long to make it work without butchering it when shortening it
 
2012-03-13 04:57:10 PM
I submitted "Fluke deflowers Rush." after he was dropped from proflowers.
I thought the world should know the genius that was redlighted.
 
2012-03-13 05:38:31 PM
How about just not 1.5-2 weeks late? mmkay?
 
2012-03-13 06:45:03 PM
Golf clap to the Airplane, and the autism ones.
 
2012-03-13 07:34:36 PM
Great better off dead ref
 
2012-03-13 08:00:38 PM
These made me laugh:

49-year-old pitcher Jamie Moyer continues MLB comeback, pitches two scoreless innings, tests positive for Centrum Silver
For those whore counting, that's 26 advertisers Limbaugh has lost now

/would've loved Jonathan Hohensee's
 
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