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(Toronto Sun)   If you're thinking of leaving your girlfriend, you can choose a more opportune time than the day you win the lottery   ( torontosun.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Thibeault, Lottery, Robertson, boyfriend Maurice Thibeault, Law, Mr. Thibeault, Ms Robertson, Lotto 6/49  
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9369 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Dec 2017 at 9:50 AM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



184 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2017-12-06 09:39:55 AM  
And to think this guy had 50 other options, too.

Simon & Garfunkel - 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover (from The Concert in Central Park)
Youtube K4xoHjNjxus
 
2017-12-06 09:40:55 AM  
Can you though?
 
2017-12-06 09:41:34 AM  
So, what was his third wish?
 
2017-12-06 09:45:21 AM  
Maybe she should have been a better girlfriend.
 
2017-12-06 09:49:58 AM  
The old 'went out for a pack of smokes then jumped in a limo & off to a fancy hotel' routine, eh?
 
2017-12-06 09:50:11 AM  
You don't KNOW, subby. He had planned to do it that day anyway.
 
2017-12-06 09:51:37 AM  
Its better than the alternative.  Dumping her the day after you tell her.
 
hej [recently expired TotalFark]
2017-12-06 09:52:18 AM  
I challenge you to name one example, subby.
 
2017-12-06 09:52:21 AM  
"Guess what honey? Pack your bags, I won the lottery!" The wife squeals with delight and says, "That's great! Should I pack for the mountains or the beach?" He says, "I don't care, just get out!"
 
2017-12-06 09:52:29 AM  
I honestly can't see a better time. Maybe as you're packing, laughing like a hyena while telling her she can keep the POS car.
 
2017-12-06 09:53:50 AM  
securitiesdocket.comView Full Size
 
2017-12-06 09:54:56 AM  
files.explosm.netView Full Size
 
2017-12-06 09:55:44 AM  
$1M stuck in a regular checking account generates enough interest to pay the monthly equivalent of an above-median fulltime job. For the rest of time.

/Just sayin.
 
2017-12-06 09:56:01 AM  

Hack Patooey: "Guess what honey? Pack your bags, I won the lottery!" The wife squeals with delight and says, "That's great! Should I pack for the mountains or the beach?" He says, "I don't care, just get out!"


Came here for this joke. Leaving satisfied.
 
2017-12-06 09:56:26 AM  
A man comes home one day and yells "Honey! I won the lottery! Pack your bags!" She says "should I pack for the beach or the mountains?" He replies "I don't care. Just get out."
 
2017-12-06 09:56:53 AM  

MythDragon: A man comes home one day and yells "Honey! I won the lottery! Pack your bags!" She says "should I pack for the beach or the mountains?" He replies "I don't care. Just get out."


Oh dammit.
 
2017-12-06 09:57:09 AM  
They lived together for over 2 years and had shared previous lottery winnings and took turns buying them - yeah, she should get half.  He was a total pos to take off like that in an effort to screw her out of it.
 
2017-12-06 10:02:18 AM  

MythDragon: MythDragon: A man comes home one day and yells "Honey! I won the lottery! Pack your bags!" She says "should I pack for the beach or the mountains?" He replies "I don't care. Just get out."

Oh dammit.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-12-06 10:03:04 AM  

uttertosh: $1M stuck in a regular checking account generates enough interest to pay the monthly equivalent of an above-median fulltime job. For the rest of time.

/Just sayin.


It is kind of funny - safe bet if the ticket won $20, he'd probably have no problem giving her half - what's ten bucks (particularly Canadollars)?  It's along the lines of "Fifty percent of nothing is, let me do the math here, nothing into nothing, carry the nothin'..."

But now that he's getting millions, could retire (assuming he's not stupid with the money), travel, etc., etc., he can't bring himself to part with a few million more.

Not saying he is obliged to give up any of it - that's for the courts to decide - just that it's funny.

/But not funny like a clown
 
2017-12-06 10:03:57 AM  
"Ms Robinertson will have to rely on her own resources to ensure that she is heard fairly in these proceedings."

Mrs?

Lemonheads - Mrs Robinson
Youtube zvMFm5nKeUc
 
2017-12-06 10:04:08 AM  

idrow: They lived together for over 2 years and had shared previous lottery winnings and took turns buying them - yeah, she should get half.  He was a total pos to take off like that in an effort to screw her out of it.


Very trumpian.
 
2017-12-06 10:05:15 AM  
Christ, what an asshole! (Him)
 
2017-12-06 10:06:07 AM  
Am I reading this wrong? Didn't he agree to give her half?
 
2017-12-06 10:06:15 AM  
"Guess what honey? Pack your bags, I won the lottery!" The wife squeals with delight and says, "That's great! Should I pack for the mountains or the beach?" He says, "I don't care, just get out!"
 
2017-12-06 10:06:32 AM  
"Ms Robertson feels that she is now placed in a position of unfairness,"

Fark her.
He's been looking for an out for a while.
Life ain't fair, sweetheart.
Go dig for gold elsewhere.
You are not entitled to jack squat just because you are his "girlfriend"

Buy your own lottery ticket.

Or pay her half to leave you alone forever and ever.
May just be worth every penny since you can see her money grubbing soul through her crocodile tears.
Keep half, Make her sign an agreement that she never contacts you again.
Get a financial adviser.
When she blows through the money in a month, you'll still be wealthy and happily single.
 
2017-12-06 10:06:40 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size


The practice of harvesting scrap metal from tires past their prime, to be ground into folk medicines and aphrodisiacs, is still a common practice is many parts of eastern Europe.  Although technically legal, the practice is cruel and inhumane.
 
2017-12-06 10:07:17 AM  
I don't know Canadian law, but they weren't even married.

It's his.

You want supported for the rest of your life? Get married.
 
2017-12-06 10:07:30 AM  
Ex boyfriend should take his earnings and get tattoos on each inner bicep, on the right "patri" on the left "archy", then take whatever she would have earned and keep 25% of that, claim it as the pink tax and wage gap cap. When she complains, roll up the sleeves and flex at her. Then he can add salt on the wound and blame her for letting him cash it.
 
2017-12-06 10:08:18 AM  

hej: I challenge you to name one example, subby.


When flying through an astroid belt? Call me old-fashioned, but I like a dump to be as memorable as it is devastating.
 
2017-12-06 10:09:25 AM  

HailRobonia: hej: I challenge you to name one example, subby.

When flying through an astroid belt? Call me old-fashioned, but I like a dump to be as memorable as it is devastating.


Eat some Taco Bell.
 
2017-12-06 10:10:10 AM  

uttertosh: $1M stuck in a regular checking account generates enough interest to pay the monthly equivalent of an above-median fulltime job. For the rest of time.

/Just sayin.


Maybe 30 years ago.  You'd be lucky to get a fraction of 1% in interest now.  Those that advertise over that generally have a cap ("3% on balances up to $10000, 0.05% APY on higher balances").  CDs don't even pay 1% anymore.
 
2017-12-06 10:11:09 AM  

uttertosh: $1M stuck in a regular checking account generates enough interest to pay the monthly equivalent of an above-median fulltime job. For the rest of time.

/Just sayin.


At 1.25 percent interest, you would get $12,500 a year off a million bucks.  However, there are other investment tools that pay around 4 to 5 percent, which would be forty to fifty thousand dollars.

Interest rates being so low is why so many people do not have savings.  Also inflation is actually good, so long as wages grow with inflation, because it makes it easier to pay off past debts.
 
2017-12-06 10:11:36 AM  
There is a fifth character in the play who doesn't appear except in this larger-than life-size photograph over the mantel.

This is our father who left us a long time ago.He was a telephone man who fell in love with long distances; he gave up his job with the telephone company and skipped the light fantastic out of town. . . .The last we heard of him was a picture postcard from Mazatlan, on the Pacific coast of Mexico, containing a message of two words -

'Hello - Good-bye!' and no address.

Explains a lot.
 
M-G
2017-12-06 10:11:44 AM  

uttertosh: $1M stuck in a regular checking account generates enough interest to pay the monthly equivalent of an above-median fulltime job. For the rest of time.

/Just sayin.


I think you either need to check interest rates or your math....
 
2017-12-06 10:12:13 AM  

uttertosh: $1M stuck in a regular checking account generates enough interest to pay the monthly equivalent of an above-median fulltime job. For the rest of time.

/Just sayin.


Umm...have you seen interest rates lately?  0.10%.  You'd need a hell of a lot more than $1million for that.  Also, checking accounts rarely generate interest.
 
2017-12-06 10:12:23 AM  

idrow: They lived together for over 2 years and had shared previous lottery winnings and took turns buying them - yeah, she should get half.  He was a total pos to take off like that in an effort to screw her out of it.


Yeah, he's not a nice guy.
However, legally, there's no reason for her to get anything. From what I could see, they were not spouses, and "common-law" doesn't apply until people have cohabited for three years in Ontario (which closes a potential door on her claim.) Her argument is they had an agreement to share any winnings but I didn't see there was any evidence they had won anything previously, let alone split it. If she can prove that this was the case, then yeah-- she might have some luck.
 
2017-12-06 10:12:39 AM  
Two chicks at the same time.
 
2017-12-06 10:13:10 AM  

Sailing Starflower: I don't know Canadian law, but they weren't even married.

It's his.

You want supported for the rest of your life? Get married.


I don't know - she's claiming that they routinely purchased tickets together (each of them using their own money to buy tickets) and routinely split the winnings, regardless of who actually paid for the ticket.  If that's true, I'd say she has a good case (and she should be entitled to her typical share) if she can prove it.
 
2017-12-06 10:13:22 AM  

WinoRhino: idrow: They lived together for over 2 years and had shared previous lottery winnings and took turns buying them - yeah, she should get half.  He was a total pos to take off like that in an effort to screw her out of it.

Yeah, he's not a nice guy.
However, legally, there's no reason for her to get anything. From what I could see, they were not spouses, and "common-law" doesn't apply until people have cohabited for three years in Ontario (which closes a potential door on her claim.) Her argument is they had an agreement to share any winnings but I didn't see there was any evidence they had won anything previously, let alone split it. If she can prove that this was the case, then yeah-- she might have some luck.


This might make a good Judge Judy.
 
2017-12-06 10:14:04 AM  
Being a GF doesn't entitle you  to half of shiat. You want that go get a legal contract called a marriage.
 
2017-12-06 10:14:40 AM  
It is written that in the Dynasty of Khufu, the Goddess Shai blessed good fortune upon a man, whereupon he won 20 thousand hedj in a game of chance. He announced to his wife "gather up your travel goods, for Fate has awarded me a great fortune!"

Upon this, the wife inquired "shall I pack for traveling up the Nile or down the Nile" and the husband replied "I care not, just begone and banish yourself from my sight and abode."

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-12-06 10:14:56 AM  
I've seen this kind of thing before:

Man Stroke Woman - The Breakup
Youtube wR3nPbWnOyw
 
2017-12-06 10:15:21 AM  
Why did they show the guy's picture and not the girlfriend?
 
img.fark.netView Full Size

There. Now I can have an opinion.
 
2017-12-06 10:16:16 AM  
Ambivalence:
Umm...have you seen interest rates lately?  0.10%.  You'd need a hell of a lot more than $1million for that.  Also, checking accounts rarely generate interest.

Wrong. I bet a lot of people are going to be interested in his checking account soon.
 
2017-12-06 10:17:29 AM  

uttertosh: $1M stuck in a regular checking account generates enough interest to pay the monthly equivalent of an above-median fulltime job. For the rest of time.

/Just sayin.


Median income in USA is $59k. The best APR on a checking account I could find was 2%. That's $20k if you have $1m in there for a year.
 
2017-12-06 10:17:35 AM  

uttertosh: $1M stuck in a regular checking account generates enough interest to pay the monthly equivalent of an above-median fulltime job. For the rest of time.

/Just sayin.


In what world? Interest rates on better savings accounts are barely 1%. That gets you $10,000 a year. To hit 5%, or $50,000, you've got to do longer term investments, or take a little risk. Not that it's unreasonable to do so. But $1,000,000 in a regular checking or savings account isn't going to get you a good living on the interest alone.
 
2017-12-06 10:18:06 AM  

uttertosh: $1M stuck in a regular checking account generates enough interest to pay the monthly equivalent of an above-median fulltime job. For the rest of time.

/Just sayin.

You're at least two orders of magnitude off.

My checking account right now is paying 0.01%. For a $1M balance, that's about $8.33 a month in interest.

If you could find a checking account that paid 1%, that would net you $10k/year or $833/mo pretax, and if you know a bank doing that, please point me at it.

OTOH, a 5% yield is possible with a reasonable basket of dividend stocks and ETFs to draw about $50k/year.
 
2017-12-06 10:21:02 AM  
"Guess what honey? Pack your bags, I won the lottery!" The wife squeals with delight and pushes him down the stairs.
 
2017-12-06 10:22:58 AM  
OK,, she has to take a polygraph test first, on the question "if you had won the 6 million, would you have split it evenly with him?"
 
2017-12-06 10:23:08 AM  
This is a perfect example of how winning the lottery ruins lives.
These people were living together and now they're apart and fighting over money.  It's not like the money made them different people overnight, it  just made them THINK they were different people.

/if I won 6 million nothing would change in my family, only where we live.  Which is probably why I don't play the lottery.
 
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