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Fark NotNewsletter: Better late than ____________
Posted by DisseminationMonkey at 2017-11-14 12:25:48 PM (66 comments) | Permalink
More: FarkBlog

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1402 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Nov 2017 at 7:51 PM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



It's time for the Fark NotNewsletter! It's late this week, but so's your face. Enjoy!
 
 
Comment Mentions
 
The number of comments these words were mentioned in on Fark and TotalFark in the past week. Note: This does not mean they were the most-used words
 
Veterans Day - 63
Roy Moore - 3780
Louis C.K. - 361
 
 
Comment Votes
 
Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week
 
Funny:
Erma Gerdd posted some helpful bicycling hand signals
Mad Scientist had another way of describing what happened on that "missing" boat
Pocket Ninja described how police can tell a good guy with a gun from a bad guy
Prank Call of Cthulhu thought that a lion's goofy expression looked familiar
luckyeddie reacted to the phrase "mass shooting"
Claude the Dog found the moral of the Louis C.K. story
SkylineRecords reacted to Roy Halladay's death
JNowe shared a phrase that people should start saying
freddyV had a hat for Roy Moore
ZAZ proved that Farkers are just smartasses for voting "funny" on this quote
 
Smart:
dv-ous explained why being a teacher is more tiring than a regular office job
Voiceofreason01 compared static and dynamic analysis
RTOGUY noticed something about mass shooting statistics
4seasons85 analyzed Louis C.K.'s statement about his behavior toward women
Markoff_Cheney pointed out that times are tough for a certain type of person
hobbes0022 had some suggestions for stopping mass shootings
bigfatbuddhist discussed the role of religion in terrorism
Grand_Moff_Joseph listed possible thoughts some people have when a shooter turns out to be white
naughtyrev found the main flaw in a business plan
FormlessOne listed the many reasons why a restaurant failed, and what should have been the lesson from that experience
 
CSB Sunday Morning: Out of Time
Smart:
Man_Without_A_Hat had first-hand experience of the importance of winning over "hearts and minds"
Funny: Recoil Therapy bravely struggled through sleep deprivation
 
CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread where Farkers share stories based on a weekly topic. If you would like to suggest a topic for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please email dugitman.
 
Politics Funny:
RodneyToady explained why Donald Trump was right about Japan
derpes_simplex showed us Trump's reaction to Democrats winning in Virginia
Eddie Adams from Torrance wanted to hear more predictions
Markoff_Cheney didn't hold back when filling out a satisfaction survey
Angry Drunk Bureaucrat explained why Paul Manafort has to wear an ankle monitor
 
Politics Smart:
bloobeary agreed that the Republican Party isn't racist
FormlessOne discussed a woman's faith in Trump
Pocket Ninja gave advice on dealing with deplorables
AdmirableSnackbar advised someone who doesn't want to be called a bigot
FormlessOne thought that political parties should not allow white supremacists to join them
 
 
Contest Votes
 
Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down
 
Photoshops:
Herb Utsmelz just put a bandage on the problem
Yammering_Splat_Vector gave a peek inside the modern stone age White House
Yammering_Splat_Vector fixed a photo up like new
Iggie gave this robot a new friend to hang out with
ionthrust got pizzalitical
Tom G discovered that Farking can be hard on your pecker
Tom G knocked one out of the park
RedZoneTuba thought this was a kool map
Don_cos showed a scene from a prehistoric flood
Yammering_Splat_Vector made an arresting image
 
Farktography:
Lovesandwich won Farktography Contest No. 653: "Purple 2" with a purple city
 
Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, you can contact Elsinore or stop by the Farktography Forum.
 
 
Upcoming Fark Parties
 
See Farkers up close in their unnatural habitats
 
Saturday, November 18th: Seattle Fark Party
 
 
Fark Headlines of the Week (brought to you by Blythe)
 
Thank you submitters for another fun week, and thank you TotalFark voters for voting the funniest headlines to the top!
 
Every week, we take the top voted funny headlines for Headlines of the Week, and share some of our favorite runners-up here in the NotNewsletter.  We love all our green lights, and to make it to Headline of the Week it needs to be funny, creative, smart, look at a story sideways - the kind of headline that you can share with anyone and say *this* is Fark.  
 
Here are the extra headlines that we thought deserved a second look!  And check out the top voted winners in Fark Headlines of the Week!
 
Main - as always, Main has the most competition and it's so fun to see which headlines took your fancy and got voted to the top.  We took the top 12 this week, and we liked this obvious but funny Fark one - 
 
Groundbreaking has begun on Fark's new headquarters
 
Sports - this tab gave us plenty of chuckles this week, we took the top four headlines and there were quite a few more that we wish we would have considered.  Here is just one of the headlines that didn't quite make the cut but still made us laugh - 
 
Former MLB pitcher gets drunk and tackles country singer onstage, causing injuries. Browns considering making an offer
 
Geek - thanks to our Geek submitters, this is always a fun tab to check out, funny *and* smart.  We took the top five for Headline of the Week this week - and still had one more funny one to share here in the NotNewsletter: 
 
Writer uses 4136 characters to say why 280 is too many for Twitter
 
Entertainment - some great gems in this tab this week - and an extra that made us chuckle even though it didn't get the top votes
 
Marilyn Manson would like some attention please, thank you
 
Politics - thanks submitters for making politics - the headlines at least - funny.  We took the top 15 this week - take a look!
 
Business - we had some great gems in this tab this week and a lot more funny headlines that didn't get votes - take a look in this tab and make sure to vote!  
 
Discussion - the tab has gotten really fun lately, tons of Live discussions on sports, TV shows, politics, more, and a lot of fun random topics.  For Headline of the Week the headlines have to be funny as well as fun, and we're getting some!  We make sure to consider both types of headlines that show up in the Discussion tab - the multi-sentence/ multi-question headlines, and the more traditional one-line topic headlines.  Keep them coming - both the fun discussions and try your writing skills at making them funny too!  Submitters, if you're looking for some positive reinforcement and less competition, try starting here and work your way up to competing in the funnier tabs!
· · ·

66 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2017-11-14 12:27:42 PM  
Fark YOu.
 
2017-11-14 12:28:45 PM  
   pregnant.
 
2017-11-14 12:30:30 PM  
Aborted
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2017-11-14 12:30:54 PM  
Bacon? Bacon? Where's the bacon?
 
2017-11-14 12:32:07 PM  
dead
 
2017-11-14 12:32:17 PM  
...leftover brussels sprout burritos! ;)
 
2017-11-14 12:32:28 PM  
Ezra.
 
2017-11-14 12:34:02 PM  
...diarrhea
 
2017-11-14 12:36:09 PM  
gravy
 
2017-11-14 12:36:13 PM  
penis.
 
2017-11-14 12:38:07 PM  
a swift kick in the nads
 
2017-11-14 12:38:15 PM  
Better late than

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-11-14 12:40:40 PM  
Natural Light?
 
2017-11-14 12:43:16 PM  
A poke in the eye.
 
2017-11-14 12:43:34 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size


You're dead to me, DisseminationMonkey...
 
2017-11-14 12:45:05 PM  
a pedophile
 
2017-11-14 12:48:13 PM  
Better steak than pleather.
 
2017-11-14 12:48:49 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-11-14 12:55:15 PM  
Ever.
 
2017-11-14 12:57:15 PM  
Underwear goes on the inside.
 
2017-11-14 12:59:03 PM  

ZAZ: Bacon? Bacon? Where's the bacon?


NO BACON???????

i0.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2017-11-14 01:00:37 PM  
...a trump indictment
 
2017-11-14 01:01:25 PM  

jim32rr: Underwear goes on the inside.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-11-14 01:03:25 PM  
Better Nate than lever
 
2017-11-14 01:04:45 PM  
orange crate
 
2017-11-14 01:05:04 PM  
Done
 
2017-11-14 01:06:00 PM  
...Roy "too early" Moore.
 
2017-11-14 01:07:33 PM  
Fark NotNewsletter: Better late than Bacon.
 
2017-11-14 01:08:33 PM  
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size


Fourteen
 
2017-11-14 01:13:16 PM  
A late newsletter?
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-11-14 01:16:40 PM  
clever.
 
2017-11-14 01:18:27 PM  
Bambinated?
 
2017-11-14 01:19:15 PM  
your mom.
 
2017-11-14 01:23:40 PM  
... a modmin.
---------------
... premature
 
2017-11-14 01:24:29 PM  
dead.
 
2017-11-14 01:26:50 PM  

cowgirl toffee: dead.


In all honesty, how would we know?
 
Boe [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2017-11-14 01:30:27 PM  
...pation
 
2017-11-14 01:32:24 PM  
Wait, why is my face late?
 
2017-11-14 01:33:59 PM  
Better late than Moderator.
 
2017-11-14 01:36:16 PM  
Better Late than Never (Flash Gordon) 1980
Youtube -Eb65RL4WFQ
 
2017-11-14 01:36:21 PM  

xxBirdMadGirlxx: cowgirl toffee: dead.

In all honesty, how would we know?


We'll all find out eventually, but I'm willing to delay it as long as I can.  :)
 
2017-11-14 01:47:34 PM  

cowgirl toffee: xxBirdMadGirlxx: cowgirl toffee: dead.

In all honesty, how would we know?

We'll all find out eventually, but I'm willing to delay it as long as I can.  :)


I already found out...there are more balloons than you'd expect.
 
2017-11-14 02:04:29 PM  
sober.

/Brought to you from Maker's Mark. Tastes Like Burning!TM
 
2017-11-14 02:09:42 PM  
neutered?
 
2017-11-14 02:12:57 PM  
...being marginalized.
 
2017-11-14 04:22:22 PM  
Roy Moore

/would also accept Jeff Sessions
 
2017-11-14 04:23:08 PM  
Your mom
 
2017-11-14 04:38:56 PM  
Moore
 
2017-11-14 07:53:26 PM  
Burma Shave
 
2017-11-14 07:54:39 PM  
In the butt
 
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