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(WCAX Vermont)   Kid brought butterknife to school. For lunch. So, obviously the kid needed to be taught a lesson   ( wcax.com) divider line
    More: Florida, butter knife, Maude Saunders, Butter, Maude Saunders Elementary, DeFuniak Springs, Principal Pamela Jones, peanut butter, school officials  
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6149 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Oct 2017 at 11:55 PM (4 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



87 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2017-10-19 11:23:18 PM  
frinkiac.com

Their hands are tied, there's nothing that can be done.
 
2017-10-19 11:26:37 PM  
Well, yeah, I mean the poor kid's eating stainless steel.  Someone needs to introduce her to pizza.
 
2017-10-19 11:48:34 PM  
Zero tolerance policies like this are an invention of the liberals.
 
2017-10-19 11:49:58 PM  
"We had an incident with a student in first grade that did have a butter knife in her possession," Principal Pamela Jones said. According to Jones, the student was found with the knife while eating lunch in the cafeteria. "The assistant principal acted on the incident, spoke with the parents and initiated the suspension for the safety and well-being of all our students," Jones said.

They busted a 6 year old.

Good thing she didn't have a Pop-Tart chewed into the shape of a gun. Lockdown, send her to Gitmo!

/if she's black, shoot her
 
2017-10-19 11:53:34 PM  

lycanth: Zero tolerance policies like this are an invention of the liberals.


And projection is an invention of conservatives.
 
2017-10-19 11:58:25 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-10-20 12:02:23 AM  
have they taken away all the pens as they make a good stabbing item.
next, the pencils....
the only thing they should have is crayons....and i don't trust them much either.
 
2017-10-20 12:03:43 AM  
The solution is to have a all school assembly.  Have a little play about the danger of knives (and peanut butter).  Then call little suzie up on stage and run her through with her own butter knife.  Have the other kids watch.  Tell them "this is what can happen if you bring anknife to school".  Also while she is on the floor bleeding out, gently stroke her face and whisper "look what you made me do".
 
2017-10-20 12:05:10 AM  
Zero tolerance leads to the criminalization of non-criminals.  I hope that principle gets herpes.  Why?  Because internet.
 
2017-10-20 12:07:03 AM  
No surprise this happens in GOP strongholds.  No surprise at all.
 
2017-10-20 12:07:46 AM  

WTP 2: have they taken away all the pens as they make a good stabbing item.
next, the pencils....
the only thing they should have is crayons....and i don't trust them much either.


I'd say this could be solved with iPads, but a pencil wound is preferable to being bludgeoned to death with a tablet.
 
2017-10-20 12:08:52 AM  
 
2017-10-20 12:10:45 AM  
How can an adult look themselves in the mirror and say "today, a little girl in grade one with a butter knife scared me, so I suspended her. I'm a good person who did the right thing".
 
2017-10-20 12:11:10 AM  

Boo_Guy: [frinkiac.com image 640x480]

Their hands are tied, there's nothing that can be done.


They're uncompromisin', enterprisin', anything but tranquilizin'
 
2017-10-20 12:12:32 AM  

Thong_of_Zardoz: How can an adult look themselves in the mirror and say "today, a little girl in grade one with a butter knife scared me, so I suspended her. I'm a good person who did the right thing".


They don't have souls.  Or reflections.
 
2017-10-20 12:13:10 AM  

Carousel Beast: backhand.slap.of.reason: No surprise this happens in GOP strongholds.  No surprise at all.

http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/20​16/jun/17/pop-tart-gun-suspension-uphe​ld-by-maryland-judge/


Stop making sense!
 
2017-10-20 12:13:38 AM  

WTP 2: have they taken away all the pens as they make a good stabbing item.
next, the pencils....
the only thing they should have is crayons....and i don't trust them much either.


If I could choose between a butter knife and a pencil as a weapon I'd definitely pick the pencil.

Though a butter knife would be better for popping eyes out.

[insert sloppy scooping sound effect here]
 
2017-10-20 12:14:36 AM  
Wow, politicized already.

Instead of blaming one side or the other, y'all should agree that zero tolerance policies are a failed experiment and work together to get rid of them. You'd probably get a lot of support from the middle.
 
2017-10-20 12:14:59 AM  

WTP 2: have they taken away all the pens as they make a good stabbing item.
next, the pencils....
the only thing they should have is crayons....and i don't trust them much either.


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
 
2017-10-20 12:15:34 AM  

skyotter: Wow, politicized already.

Instead of blaming one side or the other, y'all should agree that zero tolerance policies are a failed experiment and work together to get rid of them. You'd probably get a lot of support from the middle.


But if we don't blame the other side, how do we know if we won?
 
2017-10-20 12:15:48 AM  

Mugato: lycanth: Zero tolerance policies like this are an invention of the liberals.

And projection is an invention of conservatives.


Obfuscation is a tactic of the leftists.
 
2017-10-20 12:16:16 AM  
When asked how a masked man dressed in black and brandishing a sword was allowed to enter school property, officials cited their Zorro Tolerance Policy.
 
433 [TotalFark] [BareFark]
2017-10-20 12:19:07 AM  
I read it several times and I'm not sure even still if that is an excellent parody.
 
2017-10-20 12:19:48 AM  
So stupid. It was probably a plastic knife, too.
 
2017-10-20 12:19:53 AM  

Loose_Cannon: Mugato: lycanth: Zero tolerance policies like this are an invention of the liberals.

And projection is an invention of conservatives.

Obfuscation is a tactic of the leftists.


This sadly is the state of discourse in America today...

/You smelt it, you dealt it
//You denied it, you supplied it
///idontwanttoliveonthisplanetanymore.​jpg
 
2017-10-20 12:22:50 AM  
A long time ago my cousin told me strip searches were performed wit the aid of a butter knife.  She was pretty odd.
 
2017-10-20 12:23:32 AM  

WTP 2: have they taken away all the pens as they make a good stabbing item.
next, the pencils....
the only thing they should have is crayons....and i don't trust them much either.


Excellent...point
 
2017-10-20 12:24:03 AM  
But her knives!
 
2017-10-20 12:24:06 AM  

WTP 2: have they taken away all the pens as they make a good stabbing item.
next, the pencils....
the only thing they should have is crayons....and i don't trust them much either.


Don't be fooled, first graders would kill you if they had the chance.
 
2017-10-20 12:24:45 AM  
Any word if it was loaded with Peanut butter?
 
2017-10-20 12:24:49 AM  
A first-grade student at Maude Saunders Elementary School

Jebus I first read this as Maude Flanders Elementary school.... Late   and a little baked
 
2017-10-20 12:24:59 AM  

Tetrazphere: WTP 2: have they taken away all the pens as they make a good stabbing item.
next, the pencils....
the only thing they should have is crayons....and i don't trust them much either.

Excellent...point


Crayons come in defined colors.  There are no mixed color crayons.  Therefore they are racist.  So crayons are out.
 
2017-10-20 12:25:56 AM  
Csb. I'm a florida native. In elementary school, 1-5 grades back then. I was in 4th. One day I brought in a blow gun I hade made the night before. I took a golf club and cut it to length. Perfect tube. Then plastic q tip, cut off one cotton end and melt a needle into the hollow tube for perfect darts.
I was the cool kid for the first and second period. Caught this one guy in the buttocks full stride running away from me.
The principal barged in third class and dragged me out by the ear.
I was the first student suspended from Woodlands Elementary School.
What a jerk, I guess florida man in the making.
 
2017-10-20 12:26:23 AM  
I owe an "h"
 
2017-10-20 12:27:50 AM  
He spread the butter?

img.fark.net
 
2017-10-20 12:28:18 AM  
img.fark.net

"She pulls a butter knife, you pull a gun. She spreads processed cheese on a cracker, you send one of hers to the morgue! That's the Useless School Board way!
 
2017-10-20 12:32:21 AM  
keanu reeves - " pencil kill scene" john wick 2
Youtube XC9irJsAZQk
 
2017-10-20 12:33:18 AM  

lycanth: Zero tolerance policies like this are an invention of the liberals.


No, it is a frightened and litigious parent invention. Partisan politics has little to do with it.
 
2017-10-20 12:33:32 AM  

imauniter: Csb. I'm a florida native. In elementary school, 1-5 grades back then. I was in 4th. One day I brought in a blow gun I hade made the night before. I took a golf club and cut it to length. Perfect tube. Then plastic q tip, cut off one cotton end and melt a needle into the hollow tube for perfect darts.
I was the cool kid for the first and second period. Caught this one guy in the buttocks full stride running away from me.
The principal barged in third class and dragged me out by the ear.
I was the first student suspended from Woodlands Elementary School.
What a jerk, I guess florida man in the making.


Also Florida Man. We used to modify the black mechanical pencils so that the center part (the eraser holder and down) would slide backwards, took the eraser out and cut a groove for a rubber band, attached the other end of the rubber band to the pocket clip, took the whole tip off. It would launch anything you could fit in the tube at an impressively high velocity, including several BBs at once.

This was like 2nd grade.
 
2017-10-20 12:41:48 AM  

lycanth: Zero tolerance policies like this are an invention of the liberals.


Until it's their kid.
 
2017-10-20 12:43:22 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2017-10-20 12:46:50 AM  
Seen breathing a sigh of relief:
img.fark.net
 
2017-10-20 12:47:24 AM  

Skeleton Man: imauniter: Csb. I'm a florida native. In elementary school, 1-5 grades back then. I was in 4th. One day I brought in a blow gun I hade made the night before. I took a golf club and cut it to length. Perfect tube. Then plastic q tip, cut off one cotton end and melt a needle into the hollow tube for perfect darts.
I was the cool kid for the first and second period. Caught this one guy in the buttocks full stride running away from me.
The principal barged in third class and dragged me out by the ear.
I was the first student suspended from Woodlands Elementary School.
What a jerk, I guess florida man in the making.

Also Florida Man. We used to modify the black mechanical pencils so that the center part (the eraser holder and down) would slide backwards, took the eraser out and cut a groove for a rubber band, attached the other end of the rubber band to the pocket clip, took the whole tip off. It would launch anything you could fit in the tube at an impressively high velocity, including several BBs at once.

This was like 2nd grade.


I would have been sitting next to you, helping you figure out how to make it even better. The teacher would find out and you'd get in trouble, but I wouldn't. The teachers never thought I had a bit of evil in me.
It was simply coincidence that the greatest pranks were always played by my desk neighbors...
 
2017-10-20 12:50:07 AM  
Sue the ever loving shiat out of them. That's the only way to really fight back against this craziness.
 
2017-10-20 12:51:03 AM  

girlygirlmpls: [img.fark.net image 225x165]


The most misquoted movie line ever next to "Luke, I am your father"
 
2017-10-20 12:52:06 AM  

Boo_Guy: [frinkiac.com image 640x480]

Their hands are tied, there's nothing that can be done.


You know this is because of parents, right?
 
2017-10-20 01:05:03 AM  

Skeleton Man: WTP 2: have they taken away all the pens as they make a good stabbing item.
next, the pencils....
the only thing they should have is crayons....and i don't trust them much either.

If I could choose between a butter knife and a pencil as a weapon I'd definitely pick the pencil.

Though a butter knife would be better for popping eyes out.

[insert sloppy scooping sound effect here]


A guy in high-school math class used to stab me in the back out of the blue with a pencil for shiats and giggles.  They're reasonably effective at being irritating, especially when the graphite breaks off under the skin.
 
2017-10-20 01:07:31 AM  
I am pretty sure that the school had much safer things that children can get their hands on if they feel like going on a stabbing rampage. Pencils, pens, or god forbid, scissors. Even the little safety ones they let the little kiddies use are on par with a butter knife as far ans any sort of danger is concerned. What a bunch of assholes. I always used to carry a Swiss Army Knife with me all the time and sometimes used it in class if I needed to. All the teachers and principal knew and it was not a problem. This was the early to mid 90's though before America got scared of itself...
 
2017-10-20 01:08:42 AM  
First grade is way too young for suspension to be an effective deterrent.

But this isn't really about punishing the kid. This is about punishing the parents. Now someone has to take the day off work or otherwise deal with having this kid around unexpectedly.
 
2017-10-20 01:08:44 AM  

lycanth: Zero tolerance policies like this are an invention of the liberals.


And yet here in Liberal Central (Berkeley, CA), my 7 year old takes metal cutlery in her school lunch every day and nobody says anything about it... Although her teacher did once mention that the steak she was eating looked really good.
 
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