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(Daily Mail)   A man was kissing a Dover sole in celebration of his catch when the six-inch fish wriggled out of his hand and jumped into his mouth, almost choking him. Moral: Never kiss a strange fish   ( dailymail.co.uk) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Charlie Bayliss, October 12, EDT, Mailonline  
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2622 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Oct 2017 at 11:11 PM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2017-10-12 05:09:10 PM  
so I guess he spits and doesn't swallow.
 
2017-10-12 05:51:31 PM  
This is why Canada's Newfies (rightly) kiss the Cod instead.
Bigger fish, less chance of kissing related choking.
 
2017-10-12 05:53:09 PM  
 
2017-10-12 09:19:34 PM  
That's not how the story goes. That fisherman was granted three wishes by a magic fish. We can only speculate what he wished for to make the fish jump down his throat, but those three-wish-thingies never work out well.
 
2017-10-12 09:20:53 PM  
Meh. Got me through college.
 
2017-10-12 09:32:43 PM  
Eventually on the sixth attempt, the fish was removed whole

For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own sole?
 
2017-10-12 10:05:24 PM  
Here is an artist rendering how it may have looked...
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-10-12 11:15:14 PM  

harleyquinnical: Here is an artist rendering how it may have looked...
[img.fark.net image 259x194]


kanye west - gay fish (south park)
Youtube ggiIhlD7ACw
 
2017-10-12 11:18:49 PM  
Not on the mouth, anyway.

/DON'T JUDGE ME.
 
2017-10-12 11:21:40 PM  

harleyquinnical: Here is an artist rendering how it may have looked...
[img.fark.net image 259x194]


Looks like he's trying to kick the fish in the nards.

/joke's on him, fish don't have nards
 
2017-10-12 11:21:41 PM  

Notabunny: Meh. Got me through college.


Once you get past the smell you've got it licked, eh?
 
AOW
2017-10-12 11:22:06 PM  
Yea, thats the story he told everyone anyway...

/it was a million to one shot doc, I tell ya
 
2017-10-12 11:24:21 PM  
I've heard of chocking the chicken but this is just ridiculous.
 
2017-10-12 11:26:05 PM  

Boo_Guy: I've heard of chocking the chicken but this is just ridiculous.


choking even.

*sigh*
 
2017-10-12 11:42:44 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-10-12 11:43:36 PM  

Boo_Guy: I've heard of chocking the chicken but this is just ridiculous.


Sometimes you have to, on a hill.
 
2017-10-12 11:48:06 PM  
Now he can say that he's a...

... sole survivor.
 
2017-10-12 11:56:40 PM  
So that's the image they chose to include?  Hey, I was attacked by a shark.  Here's a stock image of a bowl of shark fin soup.
 
2017-10-12 11:58:15 PM  
If it looks like fish or smells like fish, don't put your mouth on it.
 
OOF
2017-10-13 12:10:36 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-10-13 12:11:41 AM  

Bondith: harleyquinnical: Here is an artist rendering how it may have looked...
[img.fark.net image 259x194]

Looks like he's trying to kick the fish in the nards.

/joke's on him, fish don't have nards


Is that supposed to be 'nads'?  As in 'gonads'?  Because your high school biology teacher would like a word with you.
 
2017-10-13 12:16:03 AM  

hammettman: Now he can say that he's a...

... sole survivor.


Awesome. Totally awesome!
 
2017-10-13 12:27:30 AM  
So, bass to mouth?
 
2017-10-13 12:29:36 AM  

Bondith: harleyquinnical: Here is an artist rendering how it may have looked...
[img.fark.net image 259x194]

Looks like he's trying to kick the fish in the nards.

/joke's on him, fish don't have nards


media.giphy.comView Full Size
 
2017-10-13 01:41:04 AM  
A six inch fish? That's what you get for playing with your bait.
 
2017-10-13 02:11:31 AM  
That'll larn him to keeps hisuns mouffs shuts.
 
2017-10-13 02:20:01 AM  
Poor sole.
 
2017-10-13 02:28:52 AM  
Well, at least it wasn't a candiru...
 
2017-10-13 02:54:43 AM  
Luciano Pavarotti - 'O sole mio
Youtube d_mLFHLSULw
 
2017-10-13 03:30:29 AM  
That's what you get for French kissing a fish. The fish is now suing for sexual harassment.
 
2017-10-13 05:47:11 AM  
Was it named Ben, by any chance?
 
2017-10-13 06:26:32 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-10-13 06:48:53 AM  

trappedspirit: Bondith: harleyquinnical: Here is an artist rendering how it may have looked...
[img.fark.net image 259x194]

Looks like he's trying to kick the fish in the nards.

/joke's on him, fish don't have nards

Is that supposed to be 'nads'?  As in 'gonads'?  Because your high school biology teacher would like a word with you.


It's a perfectly cromulent slang term.  See the gif posted between this comment and yours.
 
2017-10-13 07:01:38 AM  
Wait.  He's going in for a kiss, where his mouth should be all puckered up, and yet there's enough of an opening for the fish to make a "nuthin' but net" shot and jump clear inside??

Something smells a little fishy.

/and it ain't just this guy's breath
 
2017-10-13 08:07:58 AM  
Don't kiss but definitely read.
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-10-13 08:08:37 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-10-13 08:51:22 AM  
I heard this wasn't an accident, that he is part of a tuna lick fringe.
 
2017-10-13 09:24:40 AM  
Could have been much worse.  Luckily for him, the "six-inch fish" was only four inches long.
 
2017-10-13 09:33:15 AM  
He's got sole, but he's not a soldier.

When a fish bites your knee, that's a morray. When you go for the kiss and you swallow it whole, that's a sole.
 
2017-10-13 09:53:41 AM  
When I get around a fish I just start kissing them, and when you're a star they let you. You can do anything, grab them by the adipose fin.
 
2017-10-13 12:03:25 PM  

secondpsych: So, bass to mouth?


+eleventy
 
2017-10-13 12:31:20 PM  
What no Tongue?
 
2017-10-13 12:31:31 PM  
Well, he didn't sniff it.

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2017-10-13 02:08:45 PM  
Tasty dish?
 
2017-10-13 02:19:38 PM  
Never mind, mate. Plenty more fish in the sea
 
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